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𖦹 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁
Parties. Rokuro hated Parties. He had no idea why he let his classmates drag him all the way here. It was some rich kid's home that everyone liked but Rokuro was way too anxious to actually want to go, he just did. Shiki insisted and Ikari was the one to pull him all the way. So annoying. The white haired guy knew he probably had some bruises on his upper arm from how strong his friend - if he could call him that way - pulled on him. Horrible. The bruise could turn into a squeezed blood vessel and pop and he'd die. Oh god.. he'd just die. Well, maybe then he wouldn't have to endure this horribly loud gathering of young adults in this horribly big house in which he just couldn't walk inside.
Everything was way too huge for his liking, the ceiling was way too high above his head - it felt like it would just drop on top of him, crushing his body. The doors looked heavy, as if they would just rip out of their hinges and burst through the way onto the ground taking everything - the floor, the couches, the TV, vases - with it down. Horrible.
Sazanami was the one who handed him a drink very violently, now his chest was burning from the alcohol. And his throat was itching. Is he going to get sick? Will he die now?? And why was he feeling so hot? Oh god, he never had alcohol before, what if it's alcohol poisoning settling in already!
Rings.
Rokuro's eyes noticed you standing across the room, drink in your hand, hair messed up, hands decorated with big rings. You had a few piercings in your ears, you looked so cool in his eyes. He could never wear piercings. What if it got infected? His body rejecting the metal? What if he'd die from it?! Horrible. Just horrible. But here you were, with your piercings and a smile on your lips.
Of course had noticed you before, he was very observant. He had to, or he would die. What if someone attacked him? Or someone got sick? Or a fight opened up?! He had to be ready. Of course his eyes were everywhere at once.
You were in his class too, at least in his biology class. He loved those lessons, Rokuro would inhale all the information he needed, everything he had to know about bacteria, wounds, body, animals. Everything is biology. At times he'd get sick though, when things were too disgusting but you managed just fine. You didn’t even gag when the Professor decided to do a dissection of small animals - frogs, birds (those were super difficult), even fish sometimes, or bigger animals like a cat but then only one while the entire class watched. Horrible. During those lessons, Rokuro always wore a mask too, he had to be safe from viruses. His immune system was weak.
Part of him was jealous of you too, you were always so brave, talking to the teachers, starting arguments, asking questions, you knew your stuff. He wished he could do this too but Rokuro was just good during tests, he rather just put everything on paper than having to speak up. What if his voice cracked? And it turned out his throat was about to explode? You never know what things are in food, especially cafeteria food. It tasted well but maybe someone poisoned him — Rokuro only realized he was staring when you turned to him and smiled.
And oh god! You noticed him, you noticed him. Panicked, the boy quickly turned left and right, trying to escape your beautiful eyes catching his awkward self. He has been staring, being buried in his thoughts and worries for a good five minutes. How didn’t he notice it sooner?! ANd why would you even look back at him!? With the drink spilled from moving too quickly, Rokuro finally found Shiki and the others, he hid behind Kougasaki - another classmate of his that had joined the party very unwillingly.
“What?” He questioned, turning slowly around to the scared boy but Rokuro just waved his hand and whimpered in fear. The others were also confused, and chuckling a little bit.
“Y/n saw me staring at him!” Rokuro whined and shook his head, he aggressively handed Shiki his drink and pulled his red scarf upwards to hide his face. This was horrible. Absolutely horrible. His stupid heart was racing, his face was burning and his chest was still so hot! The alcohol just didn’t go away. Would he have to suffer through- he couldn’t even finish his train of thoughts hearing his classmates laugh. At him! They were laughing at him.
“So you just ran away?” Shiki asked and tilted his body to the side to look at Rokuro, he nodded. Of course he ran, he didn’t want to be perceived as weird.
“What else should I have done?! He is way too cool.” He sighed and shook his head. This was so unfair, especially because the others also agreed! They just agreed that you were too cool for him! How mean! But Rokuro didn’t want to say more, he just wanted to hide in his scarf and never look at you again. This had to be some kind of torture, he knew it. It was, definitely was emotional torture. Bullying!
Then the group started to ignore Rokuro and just let him stand by their side, hiding away from you. You had seen it of course, you watched him leave and go back to his friends. It was a weird sight, like a deer caught in the headlights. You’ve known Rokuro had raging anxiety, but it was also a bit funny – cute even. During classes, he was the same. Always staying in the background, always quiet and doing his work perfectly.
Your hand traveled through your hair and you played around with your lip piercing while some stranger was talking to you, you had never seen her before and you weren’t that interested either. You wanted to talk to Rokuro. He was cute. Your attention laid on him even while you couldn’t really see him anymore, the house party was crowded but you still tried to catch a glimpse every time someone moved around. It was a game of luck but you didn’t mind it at all.
Music was ringing in the air, you’ve been here long enough to say it stopped bothering though and it was just in the background, the beat making your heartbeat thump loudly in your chest. It was rare for you to go to parties as well, especially ones you barely knew anyone. You loved raves though, you loved dressing up and spending days jumping to loud rhythms and beats that let your blood feel like it was part of the universe. The house party was just because you felt like you wanted to do something more relaxed today but not sit at home.
You would’ve preferred going for a walk the first hours you spent here but now Rokuro was there as well and your interest was piqued ever since. Despite your "aggressive" looks, as your parents had called it, you were shy at times. And Rokuro was one of those cases. You loved being a punk, you loved the overly excessive jewelry and chains, the piercings, the movement. There was something that had pulled you into the community from a very early age but your parents had planted doubts in your head. And part of you didn’t want to scare off Rokuro by just talking to him. There had to be an opportunity.
𖦹𖦹𖦹
The party was still going, and had been for hours. It was close to midnight by now too. Rokuro and his friends moved over to the couch, other people already went home and now there were just around 20 people left, the music was quieter now, everyone was able to hear the other’s conversation without having to stand close by. It felt more like a gathering now and everyone kind of knew each other.
The couch was occupied, the floor covered by the others who didn’t make it to the comfort of the cushions before. You were holding your drink – just a monster – in your hand, legs stretched out in front of you while you talked to Mikado. He was the one who threw the party, his parents were gone over the weekend. He was okay, not your favorite but he was a nerd when it came to movies.
Rokuro was watching you, his chest still aching, it felt like his ribs were crushing inside his lungs. It hurt. He couldn’t tell why though. Why did he feel so lost while you talked to Mikado? And why did he want you to talk to him instead? With puffed up cheeks hidden behind the scarf around his neck, Rokuro just listened to Shiki ramble about some date he went on with Mikado and Jin seemed to sulk about it. Ex boyfriend or something. Messy relationships, Rokuro thought to himself, luckily I don’t like guys.
“Ey, who wants to play some games?” Mikado called out then, you startled a bit – you just talked about a horror movie just now and you just took a second to take a sip from your drink. With a sigh, you sat up more straight and crossed your legs underneath yourself.
“Which ones?” Shiki asked and sat up more on the couch as well, Rokuro kept his eyes on you, even though they were partly covered by his scarf. He didn’t want to play games, he always messed up and embarrassed himself. It was the worst.
“We can start with seven minutes in heaven, I got an empty bottle.” Mikado held up his beer and finished drinking it before placing it on the ground. The smell of alcohol was hanging deep in the room, you just ignored it for most parts. The small crowd muttered and agreed, the ones on the ground scooted closer, the group on the couch stayed where they were.
“Nice, let’s start. So first spin is the one who has to go, second is the one to join.” Mikado reminded everyone and spun the bottle, hard, and fast. Rokuro was fixated on the bottle turning on the ground until it stopped at Shiki. He exhaled, thank god – Rokuro would have not survived if he was the first to go. What if he tripped? And hit his head on the TV drawer?! Or fell right into your arms?! Oh that would be catastrophic! That would be humiliating. No chance.
The second spin stopped at Jin. That was it, Rokuro would die from the impact these two will have while fighting each other instead of kissing. “You know what, the ones who don’t want to go with the chosen one have to take a shot.” Mikado quickly said and clicked his tongue.
That was just worse! They all will get drunk and start puking everywhere and Rokuro will catch a virus and die from a liver failure of Hepatitis A!! It is settled, Rokuro will die today. Oh god. He pulled his precious red scarf up his face and shivered from just the thought of all of them here getting sick from alcohol. Why did he agree to go again? Oh right, he didn’t! This was all Shiki’s fault and Ikari’s too!
Both Jin and Shiki downed a shot. Then the game continued. A few girls had to go together, so that’s what they did. A set of guys and girls went, then guys and guys again, a few more still shot down some drinks instead of not going. In the meantime, during those seven minutes, the others were playing UNO, that the cards were enough was actually a miracle but it was a bit more fun than having to sit and wait for the others to finish doing whatever they were doing in the closet.
And then the bottle stopped again, the head of the bottle pointing at Rokuro. Loud, it was screaming at him. Screaming to embarrass himself by going with someone who didn’t like him, screaming at him for getting up and leaving because nobody would go into the closet with him. His heart spiked again, rushing into his ears, he could hear the beat of it ringing in his throat. You were watching Mikado spin a second time, part of you was praying to stop at you, the other part was screaming no.
It stopped. Pointing at you.
You lifted your head to Rokuro who was staring at you with red blinking ears and cheeks. Was he embarrassed to go with you? Would he take the shot? Or get up. You did. With your hands pressed on the ground, you pushed yourself upwards and then patted your ripped black jeans smooth again. You would go, of course you would go. Even though your heart was speeding between your lungs.
But Rokuro did the same the second he saw you get up. A small round of “Ohhh” went through the circle and you opened the door to the small closet, it was a jacket and shoes storage room. The light was not very bright and casted shadows on Rokuro’s flushed face. It was kind of cute.
“Hi.” You said, your hands patting the side of your legs while standing awkwardly in the tight space. Rokuro tugged on his scarf, clearing his throat.
“Ahem- hi, hey!” He panicked slightly, quickly looking away. This was so embarrassing. Oh god. He was in here with you! With YOU. The you that he stared at earlier! The you he had a few projects with before, the you that was so smart and funny, the you that argued in politics class – it wasn’t one of your main lectures but you joined at times. And Rokuro did too. It was an accident one time but he was too scared to get up and leave.
And you had called out the teacher for something wrong he said, Rokuro still remembered the surprised, slight shocked face on the professor at the front of the room while you were sitting there, just a few seats beside him, in your punk jacket, pins and chains decorating it, the anarchy sign sewed on the side of your sleeve, ripped fabric hugging your hair. You wore a bandana that day. After that Rokuro always noticed you in the halls too, during breaks, even in the cities. And he always hoped to see you in politics classes, even though he would never tell that to anyone.
“You weren’t in politics in a while.” Rokuro blurted out before he could stop himself. Shit.
“Huh? Oh, yea, I guess I wasn't.” You commented and looked him up and down. He’s so tense, you thought. You wanted to ease him up somehow but you had no idea why.
“Sorry- if that came off… like I was stalking you-! Oh god! Not that I’m stalking you! I just mean that I noticed you during the lectures a few times and you always argued with the teacher! Not that that was anything bad- the opposite-” Rokuro rambled, you stared at him. Oh he was cute. But Rokuro felt like he was about to pass out. Will he die from humiliation?! He felt like a stalker. Oh god… What if you called the police on him for stalking?? That would end up with more humiliation and worse– he would have to pay money, leave school– leave the entire city!
“I didn’t think you were stalking me.” You chuckled and leaned against the closed door, hands behind your back, they were itching to reach out to him. But you didn’t.
“You didn’t?” Rokuro asked back and bit nervously on his lip below the fabric. He was so nervous and you could feel it through your clothes, the heat of being embarrassed and possibly a bit tipsy.
“Nah, I know I’m very noticeable, you’re probably not the only one who noticed I was gone, don’t worry.” You claimed, trying to defuse his anxiety but honestly the fact he noticed you were gone – noticed your absence, made your face heat up. There were times when you always wondered if someone would notice when you weren’t there, constantly questioning if you were wanted. It had stopped not a while ago and you almost forgot about it but now Rokuro brought back memories.
“Yeah! Probably, not a big deal.” The other boy quickly said and chuckled nervously. Shit, he was so cute. You did want to spend the seven minutes kissing him but you were too afraid to ask too. A silence fell over the two of you, the music was in the background, muffled and quiet outside the door.
You still weren’t over the fact Rokuro noticed you didn’t join politics in a while, you have been busy with other projects that going to lectures that weren’t your major would just be too much. But knowing he missed you practically – okay, you didn’t want to be delusional but you were already in your mind, imaging things. How Rokuro would sit at the desk in the back, just a few seats away from your usual seat, looking over, thinking how you didn’t show up, maybe even worrying. It was rare, it felt rare, something unusual.
The past few years were spent trying to get away from home, trying to find a community but never worked, never stuck to the people around you, they left, they broke contact, stopped texting. You had lost hope, just focused on college and protesting when you had enough time, sometimes you’d find a small job at a bar or similar. Just to get some money into the wallet while living in the college dorms. That was it. Always alone.
It didn’t bother you, you didn’t mind being alone, you had no issue sitting in silence in your room, reading a book, watching an anime, movies, studying. You had no issue going out, talking to people for a few hours in a club and leaving again, never seeing them again. The same goes for raves, you find your people at the place, when you arrive at the rave, the music hits your body like waves, letting loose of studying and for once feel like nothing mattered.
Yet, Rokuro.. This weird, panicked and worried guy that wore masks in the classroom when the professor cut open a cat, or talked about diseases so much that Rokuro went all green one time – He noticed you. Not the goth girl who wore those platform boots that made her taller than the door, not the smart guy, the teacher's pet of the class who always finished assignments first and wrote the longest essays, you loved debating with him though.
It wasn’t like you haven’t been close to Rokuro before, the few projects you two did before were spent in the dorm rooms, sitting on the ground, talking nervously, brainstorming, researching cell bacteria, making postnotes about the powerpoint, in which order it’s supposed to go. You had been in his room before, it was minimalistic, not too many things, only the necessary drawers, closets and clothes. You knew he had a book shelf, he probably liked to read, though you never came across to ask.
Rokuro could feel your eyes on him, looking him up and down, judging him. He felt so strangely light though, in a way he hasn’t before. Maybe it was the alcohol. Knowing himself, he had never been drunk before. But here he was, feeling all light and suddenly the tightness in his chest loosened up and the worries in his mind flooded away all at once.
“I really like your piercings.” Rokuro mumbled shyly, just because his anxious assumptions were gone, didn’t mean he still wasn’t shy.
The compliment made you freeze for a second, you hadn’t expected that but then you smiled and tilted your head to the side, feeling easier now. “I did them myself, so they’re not very even everywhere.”
“Really? They look even to me. I could never have piercings, I might die if my body rejects them.” Rokuro claimed and sighed, sometimes he really did want a piercing but for now he couldn’t.
“What? No. You won’t die if your body rejects a piercing, you might get an infection and have to take it out but that’s about it.” You explained and chuckled softly at his worries. It was a bit strange, you couldn’t deny it but piercings are things for themselves.
“No no, I would die. I just know, I can’t handle pain at all.” He quickly said back, waving his hands, trying to convince you he was totally sure he knew what he was talking about. And you had to laugh again.
“Honestly, it took a while until I got used to the pain. But it wasn’t as bad as I thought.” You told him and watched him fiddle around with his red scarf, it was still hiding most of his face, protecting him from the outside world.
“Oh, alright. Well, uh- do you have other piercings?” Rokuro asked shyly and scratched the back of his head. The space in the closet felt tighter now, why did he ask that?! But you chuckled and nodded.
“Yea, wanna find out where?” You leaned in closer, a teasing, flirting undertone in your voice. Rokuro’s cheeks flushing red all the way to his ears and he looked away. Oh god! Why would you ask that? And why like that? Why in that tone?! You were flirting with him! Oh god- His heart was about to explode in his chest. Oh no oh no, he’s going to die from embarrassment!
“Uh well- I just- I just wanted to ask!” He stuttered out and pulled the red scarf higher up his face. This was all too much! And how long were these seven damn minutes! He swore it was already over but it just didn’t end.
“Don’t be shy now, I can show you.” Honestly, you didn’t really know where your confidence suddenly came from, probably feeling a bit tired already. And also, Rokuro’s red flushed face, it was cute. And it did things to you. Your stomach churned and quirked.
You stepped closer to him in the small space, his back hit the wall behind him and stared down at you. He wasn’t that much taller but the difference was noticeable once you two were close enough. He whimpered a little – and oh, the sound of it made your head spin. It was soft, muffled by the cloth wrapped around him but you could hear him clearly anyway.
“What- What are you planning on doing–?” Rokuro mumbled, pulling his shoulders up. It’s not like he never kissed before, he did. Many times and more too just not- just not with a boy. And especially not you! You were so cool and brave and he was just this scared loser. Oh god, you were coming closer, your hand lifted carefully to his scarf.
With a gentle touch, you pulled the scarf away from hiding his face, he turned his head to the side, afraid of your proximity, he could smell the monster from your breath against his own and the alcohol mixing into your clothes. Rokuro had forgotten how it felt like having someone this near to himself, he avoided it. He hated big crowds, he hated having others around him too much.
Yet, when your nails grazed his cheek, his heart fluttered again, doing this scary flip between his ribs. It was weird, it hurt even but he let you turn him back to you. Softly. Gentle. As if he would break under any touch, any weight put onto him. Rokuro certainly felt that way but you didn’t know that, you only saw his closed eyes, his red cheeks and ears behind his long grayish hair.
“Can I?” You asked as the tip of your nose brushed his. In panic, his eyes widened and he stared at you. Shit. Shit shit shit. His heart didn’t stop racing and his mind felt dizzy, like he was about to pass out. He wouldn’t, of course – well, maybe he would. You were warm, aware of how nervous the boy in front of you was but it didn’t matter.
Part of you had been dying to kiss him for a while, the projects spent together, lessons and study sessions in the library, small class trips the professor planned. You were always nearby, always watching him. He had attracted your attention so quickly, not even for a reason. You just wanted to know how he felt underneath your fingertips, how his voice sounded when he wasn’t nervous, you wanted to see him being confident for once.
“Kiriyama?” You whispered against his lips, waiting for an answer. He breathed out, deeply, loudly, mixing with your own soft breathing pattern but he didn’t answer. Your heart wanted to just kiss him, wanted to taste him, feel the wetness of his tongue against your own but your brain screamed to back away. To give him space.
Before you could do either, the door to the closet was ripped open and Rokuro pushed you away, his hands on your chest and you tripped backwards in the little room. Mikado looked confused for a second but then was also pushed away by Rokuro running out. Oh wow… It hurt, you had to admit. Being rejected like this. But also, you understood, you were definitely too much in his space.
You pushed yourself past Mikado and went back to sitting on the ground, Rokuro was comfortable on the couch again and hid himself away. You could feel the tension still lingering but tried to ignore it, even though your brain kept replaying how he looked at you. So scared but there was something underneath, you saw it. You knew it was there. The desire, he wanted it too.
Rokuro sulked himself into the couch between Jin and Ikari, just sitting there, bouncing his leg. What was wrong with him?! Why did he actually… Why did he want to kiss you? Why did he feel like if he just leaned in all of those fears and worries would’ve disappeared? No, no, no, no. None of that, he wouldn’t kiss you! He couldn’t. He didn’t like guys, right? Or well, he never … tried it. Would it feel the same as kissing girls? Would it feel better? All these questions and worries and Rokuro couldn’t calm down, he just wanted some fresh air.
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁
You found Rokuro outside after engaging with the game for 2 more rounds, but you wanted to check up on him. He was the only one who left the group, and nobody else really noticed, or at least didn’t care much about it. You did. You felt like you had to apologise, you pushed him too far too quickly. If you had to just waited.. A soft sighed left your lips as you opened the door to the backyard, the cold air hitting your skin. It was nice, it was way too hot inside.
With your arms wrapped around yourself, you approached the other sitting by the pool, he didn’t put his legs inside, he just sat on the edge and stared down on the water. The moon was glistening in the reflection, stars softly glowing down onto you and him. He was beautiful. And for once Rokuro looked calm, he was breathing evenly, his long hair falling over his face, covering his eyes, resting on his shoulders. The tips of each strand were black. It was an adorable sight.
“Hey, you good?” You asked, slowly lowering yourself down next to him. You didn’t want to startle him by just sitting down without a word, knowing how quickly he can get scared.
“Mh? Oh, yea! Yeah, I’m okay.” Rokuro replied quietly but he was far from fine the second he heard your voice. His heart picked up on speed immediately, and his hand rested flat on his chest. This was not normal. Not at all. He must be dying, having a heart attack soon.
“Nice, I just wanted to check in.” You said and fidgeted around with your rings on your fingers. You were a little nervous, but hoped he didn’t notice. You still haven’t really figured out why you were so nervous around him sometimes. Maybe it was because you wanted him to like you? Maybe it was because you knew people judged you and you didn’t want him to judge you. He was way too kind for that, yet you still kept that in the back of your mind.
Rokuro didn’t answer you, also fidgeting with his scarf, scared and anxious. Why were you still talking to him? He pushed you away, he literally shoved you back and ran out of that damn closet like a scared fucking bunny. That was far from cool. You were cool, he wasn't cool. For a moment though, he lifted his head and looked at you looking at him.
This time though, he didn’t turn away. Nobody was here, nobody would see the two of you right now, nobody would gauge at him and you sitting here, talking quietly, nobody would disrupt him and you. Not now. They were inside, you two were outside. The moon shining down and making Rokuro’s hair shine white instead of its regular grey, each strand, each little curve of his soft waves was glowing in the light of the night.
“I really wanna kiss you right now.” You mumbled— shit. Rokuro gasped, you really just said that?! Into his face?! Nobody said that before- not to him, not now when he was this mess of a nerve. Yet you did, you said it. You didn’t ask him, it was a statement and it made his heart race even more, made it jump into his throat. He couldn’t answer, didn’t know what or how or why. He stared at you, quietly, observing your widened eyes.
You didn’t say anything anymore, too afraid to push him away again. Too afraid to feel that stinging disappointment of rejection inside your chest. It hurt a lot. And even though you were used to it, used to disappointment, to rejection, to not being wanted – it hurt a lot more than usual.
However, you couldn’t hold back anymore either, your brain was screaming to kiss him now, Under the moonlight, under the stars. Your heart was aching to taste him. The way he bit on his lower lip, still so nervous, still unsure of what to say or do. But that didn’t even matter right now. It didn’t matter to you because you noticed the way his breath hitched, how he stopped for a moment, waited and thought, and felt.
Rokuro let himself feel. But not scared, he didn’t want to feel scared anymore. Ever since Ruru died, all he knew was pain, fear, and anxiety and guilt. Guilt that was eating him up. He didn’t want to feel it anymore. He didn’t want to be this scared person anymore, this mess. Instead he for once let his heart fill with warmth from your touch, your hand finding his cheek and he leaned into your palm. It was soft, gentle. You were soft, gentle. The rings on your fingers were cold on his warm skin but Rokuro didn’t mind at all.
“I’m sorry if I pushed you away earlier.” You apologized quietly, holding your face so you couldn’t turn away. His dark brown eyes met yours in the softly dimmed garden. The wind was brushing against his hair but he didn’t bother, he didn’t care if he were to get sick, he didn’t care that his scarf had fallen lower and down against his chest, not protecting him anymore. He didn’t need it anymore. Not with you.
You apology made his heart skip a beat from its racing rhythm before he felt your lips laying on top of his own. Tender. Lightly. Like feathers brushing against each other, and Rokuro could feel your piercing against his lower lip, the metal resting there between them for a moment. And the world seemed to stopped, nothing worried him anymore. Eyes closed, feeling your warmth, the warmth in his chest.
The kiss ended as fast as it came, it felt longer though. A lot longer. Like two whole minutes. Once you brought the little bit of space back, Rokuro opened his eyes again, looking at you. How close you were to him, not backing away. And the rush of the first kiss died down, you needed it again. He tasted sweet, after alcohol. He had a cocktail earlier? Maybe. You didn’t know but it didn’t matter. Not right now.
“Can I kiss yo-” You barely got to finish the sentence as Rokuro just closed the small gap again and pressed his lips against yours once more. You melted into the kiss, melting as his lips moved against yours, soft breaths between each kiss, one by one. Your heart in your ears, blood rushing into your cheeks, making your face feel hot.
This time neither of you pulled away that fast, your tongue brushed over his lower lip, asking to push past and he parted his mouth. He could feel your piercings nudge over his own wet, warm tongue. Fuck you had a tongue piercings– a quiet whimper escaped rokuro’s throat, his hands grasping onto your wrists as you held his face close against his own.
With a gasp, you two finally broke off again, this time more rushed, more flushed, more out of breath. “You have- your tongue-” Rokuro panted slightly while pointing at his own mouth and then back at yours.
“Heh.. Yea, I do.” You mumbled back, feeling a little dizzy from not getting enough air, but it slowly calmed down and you grinned from ear to ear, watching Rokuro’s eyes sparkle, wide and surprised. And he looked so fucking hot right now, staring at you like this. Staring at you like he just had the best kiss his whole life.
“It felt .. weird. Not in a bad way! I mean in a good way– like a good weird! Like it felt nice– good, it felt good! I liked it-” Rokuro stumbled over his words and then groaned annoyed with himself and how he was acting around you. He was being so embarrassing. How could you even look at him!? But you just … laughed, a little, a chuckle beneath your breathing, mixing with the softness of the wind on your skin.
“I liked it too.” You claimed and let your head tilt to the side, smiling at Rokuro brightly. Just seeing you so content and happy about the kiss made him pull his scarf above his face again and he hid shyly behind the fabric. You were just so … so you. It felt freeing that you were sitting with him here. Outside, breathing the new sizzling feeling inside his chest turning into a fuzzy warm one. One he could handle, one he could used to even.