Work Text:
Dear Blackbeard Edward,
I apologize for the context of this letter. If you’re reading this, Bonnett gave it to you. If When I die, he was to give you this. So that means if you’re reading this, then you know what happened. This letter will summarize what I couldn’t tell you. There’s a lot to it and a lot I wish I could’ve told you.
I love you. I always loved and admired you. You never liked to have personal relationships like that though. Not until Bonnett at least. I didn’t want you to see me as weak or yourself for my feelings so I didn’t said anything. There were and still are days when I wish I did tell you. I don’t think I would’ve been good for you though. I saw how you’ve lightened up with Bonnett. It was something I resented because I saw the love you had for him. I saw how you changed and I didn’t like that. I didn’t like the change happening in my own eyes. That’s why I pushed you to be Blackbeard. Because I wanted back the man who I fell for.
That brings me to my next part, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I forced Bonnett to duel for the right to stay. I’m sorry I pushed you to take your anger out on me. I know you’d probably say that I didn’t deserve it if you were hearing me say this. But some part of me did deserve it. I pushed you past your breaking point and only egged you on more. I made you turn on the crew and everyone. I’m sorry for even sending the English and Jack back to you. Everything I did, was out of jealousy. And hope that maybe, you’d see how I felt.
Currently, it is Tuesday, February 7. You told me to kill myself. Some part of me wishes that I had. I realised after that that I should make a letter to tell you what I can’t tell you. I do wish that you had done something different but you’re grieving. You're grieving what I caused you to lose. I wish that you realised how absolutely awful you’ve been since Bonnett left.
And for Bonnett, protect him. He is as fragile as he is thick. He can handle everything but will break emotionally. Don’t leave him again, lest everyone feel his wrath again. I wish you and Edward a good life together. I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you. Treat him well.
Your Co-Captain,
Israel Hands