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This wasn’t supposed to happen.
Kai only wanted to get away just for a little bit with Morro. Just a little stroll, just a small change of pace. Besides, the guy needs to experience some greenery. His face looked famished from life, he needed to see nature.
They were out at a party before they came outside, watching the night sky as the earth made their noises. He and Morro lingered there for a while as Kai debated whether to go back in or not, he was sure Lloyd would be looking for them after they stormed out like that—when another pair suddenly stumbled out of the manor.
Neuro and Shade.
Kai and Morro were buried between the trees and under the shade. The ghost didn’t even seem to care but he took notice when the red ninja’s eyes shot open, completely alarmed.
He didn’t have much problem with the pair themselves, it was just that… Kai wanted peace. He couldn’t really have that when he witnessed how both mind and shadow masters leisurely made their way out, clearly going out to breathe some fresh air. Like how Kai and Morro were.
Even though they didn’t notice them, the feeling of intrusion pricked on Kai’s skin.
So of course, now they are here. Fallen leaves, the scent of earth, crooked trees—everywhere around them. Away from the manor, the party, just for now.
“Didn’t think you’d follow my suggestion,” Morro gave a smug smile. Kai’s feet crunched on the small branches and twigs. “You want to hide from people too?”
Kai’s mouth instantly twisted. “It’s just for now, okay?” He whipped around to face the floating man, “Don’t you miss to see some green every now and then?”
Morro’s eyes trailed the trees, the sky, the dirt. He was like that for awhile, as if feeling everything in.
His gaze softened. A flicker.
Slowly, his smile shrunk. The smugness faded away, replaced by something Kai can’t quite name. “...I guess.”
Kai’s attention lingered on him a moment longer than intended.
They continued ambling through the forest. They weren’t in much of a hurry, the night was long, the dark sky was cloudy. The restfulness and serene scene gave Kai’s head some space, unneeded or not, his thoughts drifting into shards. A creak, a slip, a trickle of regret seeped into his tight bones.
He glanced towards Morro’s way, whose head was facing the other direction. The trickle intensified.
Immediately noticing, the other turned to lock eyes with Kai, startling him a little. His instincts haven’t rusted at all, that’s for sure. But when he did, he saw that he was chewing something.
“Uh…” Kai trailed off, awkward. “You’re eating? How the hell are you eating?”
It’s not like he chewed off some leaves, right? If that’s the case, he wished he had his phone. Camera zoomed in on the ghost, focused on his dumbfounded face: the cunning mastermind of the Cursed Realm exposed to be a total dumbass! Saved in his gallery forever. He half-wishes.
Morro handed out his palm and revealed a few wrapped chocolate candies. “Skylor gave some,” he muttered, “said I should try these out.”
Kai stared at Morro, unimpressed. He ignored what he said and reminded himself that he did have a taste-testing thing with Skylor, with all of the candies back at the party. He just didn’t think the man would involve himself this much.
For some reason, his ashen hand slightly nudged forward. Just the smallest push. He’s offering Kai. Is he shy?
His eyes narrowed towards the selection of candies. It’s wrapped in golden foils. Oh, it’s Ninjasey’s chocolate. Wait, ew—it’s Ninjasey’s chocolate!
“Yeah, no,” Kai backed away with a wince, “My tongue is made more for the salty ones.”
Morro shrugged and opened another one, plopping it into his mouth. Of course he likes what he despises.
“...You’re still cold?”
His eyes shot towards the fabric around Kai’s shoulders. The white sheet, the one Morro gave him. A sudden thud, it was his heart. Simply out of habit, his expression scrunched, as if it could ease down his pulse. “This?” He says, “Why? You want it back?”
Hearing his snarky tone, Morro seemed to consider it enough of an answer. He didn't say another word and walked away.
“Hey, wait!” Kai dashed to catch up to the other. This guy’s the same as ever.
A cold droplet hit his nose.
He heard a small hiss from Morro, who instantly halted in his tracks, as if pained.
Then, another.
Kai snapped his head up, his heart caught in his throat. Light drizzles of rain began to descend from above.
His eyes widened. Morro’s arms shot up to cover his head, but as if that’s going to do anything—what’s he thinking?! The red ninja doesn’t waste anymore time, and before he could think, his body moved.
“We’re going back now,” Kai snatched Morro’s hand and dragged him to where they came from. “I told you this was a stupid idea!"
More and more droplets fell, burning patches of Morro’s skin. The small, stifled noises from the ghost didn't escape Kai’s ears, he had never sounded so absurd and ridiculous. “What are you doing?” His head whirled around, hissing, “grab your blanket! Don’t tell me you’re actually worrying about me catching a cold over you vanishing into thin air!”
Morro replied blankly, even though he’s dying right now. “I’m more worried about your vocal cords.”
“Take the damn blanket!” Kai clutched at the fabric over his shoulders and threw it at Morro’s face. He fastened both of their paces, forcing the other to match up with his speed. They came from this way and then that way, then left, then right—
Huh? This isn’t where they went through.
He swallowed. Wind rushed at their faces, following their feet as they tried the opposite direction, just to find an unfamiliar path. Only a stretch of trees before them.
Morro glanced at Kai from underneath his sheet. “Are you sure?”
“What do you mean am I sure?” Kai grits out, “I must’ve gone in the wrong direction. That’s all.”
Disbelief painted over Morro’s face. “I’ve seen this before.”
“No!” Panic pounded in Kai’s chest but he didn't give up. There was no use in thinking the worst. He pulled on Morro’s hand and dragged him to another direction, he didn’t have any problems with it. Small droplets began to pelt down the branches, his blanket (the thin shield that’s edging between life and death for Morro), and down his figure.
Kai raised his voice, assured and of conviction. Maybe a bit of desperation. “We’re not lost!”
“So… we’re lost.” Morro basically summarized, plucking the fabric off of him. “Atleast it was just a drizzle.”
This should be fine. He’s a ninja. This kind of incident is his everyday.
His pulse doesn’t stop racing though, no matter how much he tells himself that he’s gone through this before. Perhaps being lost itself wasn’t the main problem here, it was getting lost with Morro. Stuck with him. Trapped with him.
He thinks back. Was it because he was frantic? Did he not focus enough on where they were going?
Guilt stabbed him in the back, gutted his stomach, and seeped into his sweaty hands. “What did I tell you?” Kai snapped to the ghost, “What were we thinking? Why did we even go here?!”
Morro wasn’t panicking at all, as if he knew exactly where he was. Of course, why would he?
Wait. That’s right. Why would he?
“I’m sure you’ve been here before,” Morro frowned. “Stop whining and think.”
“Shut up, shut up!” Kai uncontrollably snarled, everything was racing in his ears, then he tried to calm himself down. Cold fire. Cold fire. Remember, cool down.
He slowly exhales. “Listen, you’re a ghost.” Kai said, “can’t you just… I don’t know, fly up and scan the area?”
Morro looked at him like he was stupid. However, his mouth doesn’t open.
“Uh… can you?” Kai asked again.
His hand gestured in a zipping motion to his lips.
Kai rolled his eyes. “I didn’t mean for you to actually shut up,” he spat, “c’mon. We’re in a tough situation here.”
Morro still doesn’t open his mouth, his gaze held no recognizable emotion. He kept it shut. Then, he turned away and headed off to a path of his own, bending down to pick up the small sticks laying on the dirt.
“Wait what? No, we’re not going to camp,” Kai hurriedly to follow after Morro. He continued to pick up random leaves and twigs. “Morro, we’re getting out of here now! We’re not camping!”
Morro doesn’t listen. He went through the motions of bending, picking, shifting the pile in his arms like second nature, as if he’s done this a thousand times before.
Kai says, “Is this about what I said?”
He turns to Kai. Again, he gestured to his zipped mouth.
“I didn’t actually ask you to shut up, you know,” Kai clarified, “you know how I get.”
Morro stared at him.
“Morro, stop messing with me.” Kai’s brows furrowed, “We’re lost. And can get out of here now. We literally have powers!”
The ghost doesn’t seem moved. Seeing that, Kai clenched his fists. He’s really going to make me do this, huh?
He tries to calm down. It’s nothing. It isn’t much. He just has to do this.
Kai swallowed, trying to ignore the flashbacks. He looked away for a moment before steeling himself. “Fine, I’m… I didn’t mean it when I said that,” he mumbled, “you like that?”
In response, Morro’s face cracked a bit, accidentally letting out a breathy chuckle in surprise—as if instantly catching himself, he ceased everything that he let out.
That was already enough to silence Kai to his heart. Standing there. Frozen.
He quickly switched back to his usual face. That impassive, vacant expression. A smirk tugged at the ghost’s lips. “You’re simpler than I thought,” Morro finally spoke out, his mouth then turned down. “But I’m doing this because it’s our only choice.”
So he really was just playing with me. “What’s that about simple? I—“ Kai retracts, shaking his head. Don’t give in. Don’t be too easy. “Forget that. You’re a ghost with wind powers! What the hell do you mean camping is our only choice?! Just fly up!”
Morro shifted the pile of twigs and sticks closer to his chest. Dead-eyed on Kai, like it’s obvious. “You’re a ninja,” he said, “can’t you just summon your dragon? Or use your fire to boost yourself up?”
“That’s…—“ Kai spluttered, “that’s different. I can’t just do that. I’m in a forest. My powers are a hazard.”
His head shifted away, continuing on another trail to collect random shit from the ground. “Thought so,” Morro clicked on his tongue. “It’s getting cold too.”
“But you’re a ghost,” Kai kept on, “and even if you can’t, can’t you just use your wind? It’s not that hard to use your powers, you can make me fly with that.”
Now that he thinks about it, the last time he used his powers was when they were at Stiix. When he literally blew Lloyd off of a flying piece of wood during the battle.
That was almost… a year ago.
Morro’s movements paused, almost momentarily frozen. Then he continued to bend down, collecting a stash of twigs, placing it into his arms. He doesn’t answer.
And the silence went on, making it clear he wasn’t going to respond.
Is this guy serious?
Normally, he’d be cursing at him or take out all his stress on the other. He didn’t have the energy to do that though, not anymore.
The air was slowly filled in by the forest’s rustles, distant cricketings, and a strained atmosphere. He doesn’t bother to interrupt it with his noises.
He stared at Morro’s back, who was continuing to pile up his collection. No intentions of stopping. Kai’s mind told him to keep going, to keep fighting, but he simply stood there. A gaping hole in his stomach, one that considerably grew throughout this night.
I’ve caused enough.
He swallowed an exhale, heading in the opposite direction to help Morro gather more things for the bonfire.
They piled it up. Large rocks, sticks and twigs, leaves. One more spark for the second-last.
“I wonder who said their powers are too dangerous to be used in a forest.” Morro commented, watching the fire flaring up on Kai’s index finger, letting it spread through the mass of nature.
“This is different,” Kai grits out. He placed in a few logs as the orange flame began to rise through the cold air. “Like, for this specific moment. Different.”
His mouth curled downwards, side-eyeing the ghost. “And if you’re worried it’s going to rain heavily this time, you could’ve used your wind.”
“I’ve learned the sky,” Morro said so confidently, “it won’t.”
A scoff shot out from Kai. “If you say so.” He settled himself near the fire, crouched on his knees. He probably can forecast the weather from his years’ worth of exploration experience or something like that. He could’ve seen the light rain coming.
It doesn’t matter now.
Kai sniffed. His eyes were still incredibly dry. He didn’t exactly feel cold—he’s literally the elemental master of fire, why would he—but the flame burning before them was the only light in the obscurity around them. Perhaps it’s only human instincts, or because he was the one who brought it to life, but he felt the urge to stay by its side.
Warmth enveloped his hands. The same time a wave of exhaustion really hits, as if it finally came to surface the second he relaxed. Just for a second. So many things happened.
Wearied, Kai’s head lazily turned upwards. The night was getting dark as the orange illuminated brighter. The trees surrounding them slowly became faint shadows, fading into the landscape. And the most important note, a tiresome, almost-comforting silence stirred between them.
Crimson eyes looked through the fire, to the other side. In the ghost’s hands, he was unwrapping another chocolate candy. Damn it. Kai swallowed, his stomach wasn’t aching in hollowness. Nope. Not at all.
Morro notices his stare. He then rolled his eyes and tossed one of his candies towards Kai’s side. So sudden and unexpected, which made the red ninja yelp in surprise when it fell on his lap. “You’re such a baby.”
“Excuse me?” Kai glared. He glanced between the man and the thrown sweet. “I didn’t ask for this.”
“Really?”
Somehow on cue to humiliate himself, his stomach growled. Loud enough for four ears to hear. An alarmed look towards Morro, who simply jerked his chin forward, eyeing the candy. It’s Ninjasey’s chocolate. He threw up as a kid once because of this stupid thing.
The emptiness in his center overtook his thoughts though. He hadn’t eaten at the party at all. Reluctantly, he took the candy and decided to fuck it.
Nutty. Almonds. Sweet.
It was… kinda good.
Kai immediately covered his chewing mouth with his hand, fearing that the other would see through. A smile arched itself on Morro’s lips - the satisfied, knowing kind. “I know,” Morro said. Fuck, he saw through him. “Not going to give you another one though.”
Once he swallowed, Kai stuck his tongue out. “You wish. Don’t need it.” He needs it.
Despite what they both just said, Morro’s arm suddenly shot out, throwing another one over to Kai’s side, to which he perfectly caught it. His smile turned victorious.
As if it could sway the mood, he said, “A-Anyway,” Kai unwrapped the chocolate and ate it. Good. “You’ve camped before? I mean, obviously. But you know.” Anything to change the subject.
Morro crossed his legs, setting his knuckles under his cheeks. “Yeah, Kai, I’ve camped before,” he said, like in sarcasm, “you know.”
“You were already going to make a fire the second we realized we’re lost.” Kai said firmly, “Obviously, it means you’ve gotten lost before, right? You’ve been through this time and time again?”
The ghost just shrugged. “You?”
Classic. Kai can take it. “Not me,” he starts, “not when I was little at least. It was my sister.”
He ignores the quiet jab at his chest.
Morro tilted his head—the odd thing was, he seemed genuinely interested in hearing what he had to say, all of his focus and attention pointed towards Kai. There was no absency or some sort of distance that’s usually present in his expressions.
“I remember being busy arranging things back at the shop, then she just ran off.” He said, “Followed some butterflies and got lost in the middle of the woods.”
Morro hummed.
Kai continued, “After going through dirt and mud, there I saw her, crying and sobbing. She immediately came clinging to me and went on about how much she missed me and loved me and…” He trails off, not even realizing he was smiling, “...stuff.”
When he came to, there was Morro looking at him with a weird face. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“It’s just…” Morro leaned backwards with a half-assed smile, “who’s clinging to who now?”
It wasn’t really mockery, but it still pierced him like it was. “You shut up,” he scowled, “you know what? I don’t even know why I’m telling you this…”
Morro said, “Kids are stupid. I get that part.”
“I really don’t want to hear that coming from you.”
His smile remained on his face for a while. Then, his eyes lowered as the strange fondness seeped away, gazing straight into the fire.
When Morro spoke, he was quiet. Hesitant.
“It was…” Morro said, “…your Sensei for me.”
Confusion puzzled Kai. Maybe too evidently as Morro noticed it.
“This whole thing,” the ghost eyed their surroundings, “We used to come to forests like these to train whenever I got bored of the Monastery.”
“It’s peaceful, with lots of animals and insects, and… there’s rarely any other people. It’d just be us two.”
Kai spat, “Of course you’ve already hated people as a kid.”
Morro looked up, smiling wryly. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” He then went quiet.
A second. Then two. He doesn’t continue.
“…And then?” Kai raised an eyebrow, “No story?”
“Oh,” Morro’s both brows shot up in playful surprise, “so you do want to know more.”
“Of course I do! I—” He immediately stopped himself when the other’s tone clicked. Kai slapped a hand over his face as he groaned. “You’re so fucking cunning.”
Morro doesn’t look a bit apologetic. An amused hum, almost like a faint chuckle came from his throat.
But before long, his head stirred away. “Whenever there was a good day of training, he used to take me downtown…” He hung low, “Even though there were lots of food stalls, he always treated me to the same sweet ones. I didn’t complain though.”
He kept his sights on the scenery in front of him; of how the flame’s light reflected on Morro’s gaze, as if memories were playing before his eyes.
“He sounds different back then.” Kai muttered under his breath. “He almost never takes us out. Now experience is the reward. Or so he says.”
“I assume every person is different when they’re in their twenties and their elder age, but…” Morro’s voice shrank, weighed down, “I guess.”
The fact that Morro didn’t once look him in the eye as he told all of this doesn’t go out of Kai’s notice. He’s seen this before. He’s felt this before.
Rawness. It grabbed at his chest like he was pulling Kai into the sea of indescribable fragility with him. The ghost was facing away, staring down at his hands. Like there’s something terribly wrong with it.
It doesn’t help that the guilt started to whisper in his ears, seeing such a sight.
Kai wanted to reply. But before he could, Morro spoke.
“He looks at me so differently now… like I’m something else. And I saw you all.” The ends of his mouth curled - bitter, regretful. “So I made a promise.”
“...Promise what?”
“To stop being myself.” His eyelids swept downwards. “The one you all had to fight against. Well, the me that everybody remembers.” He said, “I stopped using my powers. Stopped being angry all the time. Stopped being loud.”
Between them, the fire continued crackling.
“Using my powers would just remind me of everything about who I was.” His eyes tightened. “And no one wants to see that. …I don’t.”
A twinge, in all the drowning ache flooding his chest. Maybe it was confusion, guilt, or regret. He was feeling this way?
“How?” Kai said, cracking a little. “You were livid with your powers. If I couldn’t use mine, I’d go insane. I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t know who I’m supposed to be anymore.”
Then finally, Morro looked at Kai. Facing him in the eye.
“You know who I am, Kai,” Morro murmured. Kai tensed. “You know I do a better job at hating than embracing anything else. Even now, there’s still… a deep burn inside me.”
All of him were fixated on Kai. Every inch of his gaze, so much he could feel he was seeing right through him. “...That’s why you treat me the way you do,” Morro said, leaning forward slightly, “you know deep down, don’t you?”
Kai’s breath was caught in his throat.
It was a callout. But there were no hints of resentment, or any stings of spite to poke at him. Nothing. If anything, Morro sounded like he knew all along, but never minded any of it.
Morro’s gaze softened. There must’ve been something in the open cracks of Kai’s expression—because he backed away, might even be a little sheepishly, shifting his stare towards the fire instead.
He wanted to say something. He needed to say something. Something like you could still move forward as new, or something such as your powers don’t make who you are.
No words come out of his mouth. Lodged in his throat. He just looks at how the campfire is reflected in Morro’s dim eyes. Maybe it was too out of his own taste or maybe, after everything, the jaded space in him tells he doesn’t get to be the one to say that.
If he really wished to, if Kai wanted sincere and genuine words, grown from his heart, then he had nothing to say.
Deep down, everything he did sunk into the depths of his stomach.
When Kai wanted to sleep, Morro offered to keep watch. It didn’t seem to bother him much but it did bother Kai. The ghost then proceeds to say that he almost never sleeps, so he doesn’t mind. Does that mean he was just awake, pacing around or lying down on bed during all that time he confined himself in his room?
He shifted uncomfortably, under the white-now-dirtied cover Morro gave him. He didn’t really need it since he’s the elemental master of fire for master’s sake, but Morro just threw it at him anyway.
Kai tried to sleep. Let the drowsiness swallow his consciousness. Everytime he closes his eyes though, he sees Morro’s expression. Morro’s face.
There was so much grief, leaking out from each word that he said.
He tried to swat the thoughts away, to shake off the painful feeling. The pinpricks of the grass and cold dirt grubbed at his skin, through his clothes. It doesn’t work.
Giving up, he squints his eyes open a little. There was Morro. He’s sitting near the fire with one leg up. He doesn’t seem to notice that Kai’s still awake.
He didn’t know what he was expecting. Morro was gazing at the fire, not disturbed a bit by how it’s probably burning his eyes, his face lit faintly by the swirling flame. And, Kai saw how he looked.
He looked… tired.
It instantly reminded him of when he turned away from Kai’s hand to dance. But this time, he could see it for what it really is. The weight to his expression was heavy, but the lines were no more than soft. It wasn’t from physical exhaustion or one bad night, it’s the kind that slowly accumulated by time. The kind when you weary from a lifetime. Engraved into him.
Kai suddenly thought back. Throughout all of his cold and indifferent gazes—it wasn’t out of arrogance. It wasn’t out of superiority.
It was a result. A lifetime carrier of hatred and contempt, he could somehow see it. Of how exhausting it is. But no matter how desperate, it can’t truly be let go of.
The sight humanized him.
He saw it all again. What he called Morro, what he yelled at his face, at her face, how he treated him and everything else. It made Kai the biggest asshole there is.
And for a fleeting moment, this was scarier above all else.
Then, Morro shifted slightly, noticing that he’s still awake, watching him. A moment of surprise. It didn't last long before he was facing him with a faint smile. “Can’t sleep?”
The stab doesn’t go away. The regret made space, trapped in his mind. His knuckles whitened, gripping the edge of the blanket, then Kai turned his body to the other side. Away from Morro.
He was supposed to feel infuriating. He used to. Instead, he made Kai swallow the lump in his throat.
He thinks about tonight. All the small fights, all the things that he said, all the things he didn’t say…
He spoke.
“I’m sorry.” Kai whispered.
No answer.
His voice was a bit hoarse. “…For everything.”
He could see Morro’s reaction if he turned around a little bit. But he doesn’t. He remained there, still stuck in his frozen state of cowardice, rather to face away from what really matters.
Morro doesn’t reply. Kai didn’t need him to. That was already enough.
As the fire continued crackling, Kai slept heavily throughout the night.
—
There’s a distant voice. A bright light that’s burning beyond his eyelids. So harshly.
“—ai!” Worried shout. “Kai…!”
A louder one this time. “Kai!”
Kai instantly jolted awake. His mind conscious, everything from last night flashing before him. “Morr—“ wait.
What greeted before him wasn’t him. It was Lloyd. The sun’s rays shone down, beaming brightly behind the younger boy’s back. Kai squinted his eyes open. It’s Lloyd’s face.
“Kai, finally,” he relieved a sigh, his hands drawn back from Kai’s shoulders. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you two!”
He was groggy. Something didn’t make sense. He tries. Kai sat up in a snap as his eyes darted around the forest, “Morro! Where’s Morro?” He looked everywhere but found no signs of him. He wasn’t floating anywhere.
“…Morro? I’ll explain later, but…” Lloyd’s eyes dragged Kai’s sullied clothes up and down, “look at yourself. You need to take a shower, you’re smellier than Jay’s socks.”
Kai frowned. “You smell like our bathroom whenever Jay’s finished doing his business.”
“What the hell, Kai? That’s disgusting,” Lloyd stretched his hand out, to which Kai took it and stood up. “You smell much more like— nevermind, we had to go through every corner of this forest to find you two! Do you have any idea how worried we were?”
When Kai was on his feet, he realized that Morro’s blanket was still on him. The fire had also been put out.
Where did he…?
Noticing the worry crippling Kai’s face, Lloyd said, “Morro already left. He’s already going back to the Bounty right now. The others wanted to accompany him but he said he was fine going alone.”
What? “What do you mean? We literally got lost! Why didn’t you go after him?!” Kai hissed, “What are we doing just standing here?! We need to find him!”
Just as he was about to run off, he was abruptly held back by Lloyd’s hands, who stopped at Kai’s shoulders. “Wait, wait, calm down,” Lloyd said, hasty, “we secretly had the falcon follow him… Don’t worry, he’s safe. He’s going the correct way.”
He just heard the sound of his own mind buzzing a little. “But that— that doesn’t make any sense. That would mean…”
“…He knew the way back…?” Kai figured. This whole time?
There was something indistinguishable in Lloyd’s expression. He briefly looked away, unsure, uncertain before he spoke out. “He told me ‘take care of Kai’ when he left…” A mumble came after, “you two sure have gotten close.”
The urgency slowly faded. His words sinking in. “…He really said that?”
Why? Why did he leave on his own like that? Especially after last night?
A tightness. Did he not want to face Kai? …Did I say something wrong?
Lloyd’s voice snapped him out. “Kai, everyone’s worried about you,” he said, “we need to quickly get back. You can see him there once we’re home.”
His eyes lingered on Lloyd, the only one he could look at right now.
Kai looked down and swept up Morro’s blanket in his arms. He bit on his lower lip when he felt the fabric.
Reluctantly, he slowly nodded. And began to walk out of the forest.
There, he should be able to see Morro again.