Archive of Our Own ^beta

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It has been two years since the events of Weirdmageaddon, and Stan and Ford have been at sea tracking down massive anomalies, only stopping once in a while to stock up on supplies. It was something they enjoyed doing for the past two years, of course, but they eventually grew seasick. It wasn’t the sea itself really, but the two felt a yearning to take a break from the sea and take a gander at the land anomalies again.

The two decided to take a quick stop back at Gravity Falls to check up on everyone and see the condition of the Mystery Shack before driving out to a place of interest that Ford had detected in upstate New York. After further investigation and research, he had gathered online (with some help from Soos, since he wasn’t entirely sure how modern computers worked, although he was able to catch on rather easily). He found out the following about the property where they had detected the anomalies:

“Guests had reported things going missing, feeling like they’re being watched, strange noises coming from the vents, and seeing things pass in the hallways. They claim to see ghosts and indescribable beings roaming around the property.” Ford looks away from the computer and towards Stan. “Seems promising enough, don’t you think so, Stanley?” Stan shrugs. “Sounds pretty average to me.” Ford nods in agreement. “Yes, but the readings surrounding the property are stronger than I’ve ever seen before. Of course, not as big as the readings here in Gravity Falls, but they’re not easy to ignore.”

“So, you doods aren't staying for much longer?” Soos asks. Stan shakes his head and pats Soos on the shoulder. “Nope, sorry, Soos, but we've had this planned for, what, a week now?” Ford nods. “Yes. Anomalies of this size are just signs we can't ignore.” Soos sighs, clearly distraught. "Aw, come on, are you at least going to stay long enough to say hi to the twins?” Stan and Ford stare at Soos, mouths agape. “Wait, you mean Dipper and Mabel are going to be here? When? How?” Ford asks. Soos shrugs.

“Yeah, they were calling all year long, and they asked to visit for the summer, and I couldn’t say no to them, dude!” The brothers give each other a look, and they nod clearly in agreement that they should at least stay for a while to visit their great niece and nephew.

They don't have to wait for long, because the bus pulled up at least 5 minutes later. The twins pile out, Dipper hauling their luggage as Mabel hugs a very plump Waddles to her chest in a bear hug. Dipper groans as he pulls the luggage off the bus. He sighs in relief and glares over at his twin.

“You know, you could've grabbed your bag and let Waddles walk off the bus himself.” Mabel laughs in response. “Oh, Dipper, he's gotten too big to get off the bus without falling!” Dipper gives her a blank stare. “He literally walked to and got on the bus without any help. He would've been fine getting off the bus by himself.” Mabel rolls her eyes and sighs. “Psh, okay party pooper.” Waddles wiggles out of Mabel's arms and immediately walks over to Gompers and joins him in eating some grass.

“Hey, there's my favorite griece and grephew! The twins gawk at the sounds of the raspy voice. They immediately turn to see their great-uncle Stan standing near the main shack entrance. “GRUNKLE STAN!!!” The two drop everything and throw themselves at him, toppling over as he returns their hugs.

“Is Gunkle Ford here too?” Dipper asks. Ford steps outside and nods. “Yep. We won't be here long, but we still wanted to stop and say hello.” Mabel frowns. “Aw, why not?” Ford clears his throat. “Well, Stan and I have noticed a lot of activity at a property in New York, some place called the Undervale Hotel. There were reports of things disappearing, mysterious noises, and sightings of ghosts and creatures that have not been identified.”

Dipper gasps. “Really? That's crazy, how much activity?” Forda sighs. “More than I've seen anywhere else, only beaten by Gravity Falls.” Dipper grins, excitement flowing through his veins. “Can I come? Please?” Mabel scoffs. “Dipper! You know you can't leave without me!” Ford shakes his head. “I would love for you both to come, but…” Stan interrupts Ford almost immediately. “Hey, I don't see any reason why they can't come!”

The twins start to get giddy, but Ford shuts it down. “Stanley, it could be dangerous to bring the twins there. I mean, we don't know what will happen!” Mabel shushes him. “Grunkle Ford, we get where you're coming from, but we've been through more in one summer than most kids go through in their entire life!” “Yeah, Grunkle Ford,” Dipper chimes in, "we literally went through an apocalypse, I think we can handle whatever that hotel throws at us.”

Ford tries to find an excuse, but he eventually succumbs to defeat. “I suppose a… road trip wouldn't hurt.” The twins and Stan whoop in celebration, absolutely ecstatic about a summer filled with new adventures.

“Hey, you guys aren't going anywhere without me!” Of course, standing behind them to hear the conversation was Wendy. Stan shakes his head. “Nope, you're not coming on a family road trip with us.” Dipper coughs and cuts in. “Hey, I think it'll be fun! I mean, it's better to travel in a bigger group, uh, just in case?”

Everyone sort of sighs at Dipper's proposition, but Ford nods in agreement. “I do think it'll be good to have an extra pair of hands just to be safe.” Stan sighs, but picks himself off the ground and gestures to the car. “Well, then let's get everything packed into the old Stanley Mobile and get to it!”

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Katherine sits at the front desk, staring at the door. It doesn't move, but sits still and is void of guests as per usual. She sighs. I mean, what was she expecting? They hadn't had a guest for a week already, and she was hoping for one guest who wouldn't run out screaming.

Nathan walks through the wall to find her rubbing her forehead, distressed. “Hey, what's got you all mopey?” Katherine groans and drags her hand down her face. “Nathan, we haven't had a guest in a week, and the last one ran out before they were even here an hour! We need new business soon, or we're going to have to cut back on the water bill again.”

Nathan puts his hand on Katherine’s shoulder, even though it passes through, though the intent is still obvious. “Oh, come on, Kathy, you're too hard on yourself! I guarantee we'll get some visitors by next week.”

Katherine sighs again and tries her best to give her brother a genuine smile. “Yeah, you're right. We’ll have to get one eventually.” She takes a breath in and straightens herself up. “Okay, I'm going to take a second to get something to eat. Tell me if someone shows up, okay?” Katherine heads into the kitchen and goes to grab a bowl from the drying rack when Abaddon opens the cabinet under the sink.

“Hello, Katherine.” Katherine just eats at Abaddon and nods. “Hey, Abaddon. Please tell me you're not drinking the chemicals again.” Abaddon shook his head. “No, do not worry, I have already been thoroughly fed.” Abaddon pulls himself back into the cabinet, shuts, ting it behind him. Katherine shrugs off his behavior. Since it’s his usual behavior, she just grabs a random box of cereal to eat before doing any more work around the hotel for the day.

Down the hall, Esther was shuffling through a new book she had found while perusing through a trunk of books she had found stuffed behind a secret passageway. She eventually pulled out a dusty leather cover that featured a symbol of a triangle with a sing1700s stamped into it. The small words engraved underneath the symbol read “Secreta Bestiae Unoculicae ex Inferno.” Esther was immediately intrigued with it, filled with hope that it contained mysterious spells and dark magic.

With a g, rin, she immediately opened the book, closing the passageway behind her, but the book, written there only in Latinweirder thingslize how rusty she was at it. She had learned some to understand the meaning of a few things her books labeled, but to her frustration, she was having more trouble than usual. Ben Cowhere mes in while looking for a new book for Annabelle, since she had been insisting that she needed a new one to read.

“Esther, what’s that? Because it doesn’t look safe.” He asks. Esther scoffs. “Oh my god, don’t be a buzzkill, Ben. It’s just a book. Evenings with her and the book. “A book about what?” Esther shrugs as she skims through it, trying to read it. “I don’t know, looks fun though.” She mumbles under her breath as she tries to read it and eventually slams it shut with annoyance. “UGH, who writes this sloppily?” Ben walks over to take a look at it. “I don’t even know what language this is.”

“Perhaps I could pinpoint it.” The two took a quick look at the doorway where Abaddon was standing, holding a ball in his hands. Ben narrows his eyes at him. “But you can’t even read?” Abaddon clenches his hand in a fist. “I can still listen.”

Esther waves Abaddon over. “Yeah, I can totally read it out to you. So, do you know what Secreta Bestiae Unoculicae ex Inferno means? It’s engraved on the cover.” Abaddon takes a moment to think it out. “I believe it would be translation for ‘Secrets of the one-eyed beast from hell,’ how vague.” Esther grinned with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “Oh ho, jackpot!” Ben stares at the book for a second and gulps. “Well, I’m going to go see if that dress Annabelle wanted finally got here.” And Ben scurried away. Esther chuckles and starts reading the pages aloud for Abaddon to translate.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, as Katherine is finishing some cereal, Nathan runs through the wall panting. “Hey Kathy, Stabby Paul just let me know we have guests, 5 of them! Come on, let's get them checked in!” Katherine didn’t seem to trust her brother, but she still pushed the chair out and headed straight for the front desk.

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Katherine rushes to the desk, fixing her hair in a hurry. She arrives at the desk, just as the door flies open. The Pines family (and Wendy) pile into the hotel, Mabel tucking Waddles into her chest while Dipper pants, pulling in his and Mabel’s luggage into the hotel. Katherine looked at the scene with hope and confusion. Stan and Ford whispered hushily while taking in the scenery. Eventually, the elder duo ends up at the desk, Ford clearing his throat, as everyone else pulls luggage inside.

“Hello, welcome to the Undervale. I see you have a family of 5, plus a…” Katherine pauses to look behind the brothers at Mabel putting Waddles on the floor to carry her luggage towards the front desk. Ford looks back at Mabel and back towards Katherine.

“Yes. 5 separate rooms, if you could.” Ford pulls out his wallet. “I’m also willing to pay a fee for the pig, as an apology.” Katherine nods, glancing down at Ford's hands, noticing the extra finger. Katherine shakes it off and smiles. “Yeah, I think we could do that.” She turns her head and calls for Esther and Ben, and turns back to the group.

“Sorry, we just need to see which rooms are available.” She smiles as Ben comes down the stairs, and Esther slumps in with Abaddon following her, holding the book she had been reading. Katherine tells them to look for some free rooms, and they leave Abaddon and Katherine behind, taking only a walkie-talkie with them.

Dipper drops his bag and walks up next to his Grunkles. He examines the hotel as Stan starts to make small talk with Katherine, so they can ease into talking about the strange readings from the location. He observes the hotel, scanning through it just to take it in. Maybe also looking for something suspicious, but he didn’t really notice anything until his eyes landed on Abaddon, holding Esther’s book and looking straight at Dipper.

Dipper glares at the kid. He didn’t look like Katherine and her kids, so he could be her nephew or something. Dipper was immediately put off by the clothes the kid was wearing. Why was he dressed like a kid from the 1700s? The knee-high socks and buckled shoes told Dipper that something was immediately off. Abaddon narrows his eyes at Dipper. It’s clear, they didn’t trust each other.

“Abaddon, stop trying to intimidate guests.” Katherine chimes at him. With that, Abaddon breaks his gaze from Dipper to look at her. He scowls and scurries down the hall, followed by the sound of a vent closing. Katherine shakes it off and looks back at her guests. “Sorry, my nephew is a bit… eccentric.” She taps the table, and the walkie-talkie buzzes with life. “We got 114, 116, 117, 124, and 126 open.” Ben’s voice crackles from the device, and Katherine quickly turns to grab the keys from behind her.

Ford takes the opportunity to speak up. “You know, this place looks beautiful. I'm surprised you don't seem to have more guests based on the number of keys.” Katherine drops the key pole on the desk and sighs. “Well, people are just more drawn to the air b&b in town.” She lies.

Ford nods and hands a key to everyone and hauls his luggage over his shoulder. “I see, well, thank you.” Everyone hauls their luggage up the stairs, opens their rooms, and makes sure to settle their luggage down and rest for a moment; it was a long drive after all.

Eventually, the five of them all huddled together in Ford's room to discuss what to do during their visit. When to look for things, how to document them, etc.

“Now, kids, the owner might be trying to distract us from strange things happening, so we should try and look at night. I haven't seen anything too suspicious yet, but I can feel something is going on.” Dipper raises his hand. “I saw something suspicious. That kid dressed like he was from the 1700s was sure off.” “Psh,” Mabel starts, petting Waddles, “The owner said he was her weird nephew, him dressing like that makes sense!” Dipper shakes his head in disagreement. “Look, I know what's weird, but that's uncannily weird! Plus, when I looked at him, I could swear his eyes turned red while he was glaring at me!”

“Dipper, there's definitely weirder things here than a boy with an outdated fashion sense giving you dirty looks. Even if there was something up with that kid, we would be able to handle it.” Dipper slumped into the armchair where he had taken his seat.

“First things first, we need to come up with how we split up. Stanley and I should go out the latest since we're older; it would probably be less conspicuous. Dipper and Mabel, you'll leave your rooms at around 7 in the evening, walk around acting like you're just talking. Take note of any movement or strange objects and head back at around 8 or 9. Wendy, you leave at around 9, act like you're going to take the car out to get food, but investigate the outer perimeter of the hotel for about an hour or two, hopefully until 11. Stan and I will head out around 10 to take readings of the lobby and floor that we're on, hopefully making it to the second floor by 12. Once we've examined everything, report back here at 12:30 with your examinations.”

Everyone nods, though the twins give each other unsure looks. Mabel raises her hand, and Ford nods at her. “But, Grunkle Ford, what if we run into something dangerous, like a monster! Shouldn't we have a signal or call if we need help? Just in case?” Stan scoffs. “Mabel, I've seen you guys face off a dream demon all by yourself. I think you guys are capable of anything.” Ford buts in with “Yes, though you are right, we can never be too careful. If something happens, you'll turn on your walkie-talkies,” Ford pulls 5 small walkie-talkies from his bag and holds them out as he continues on “to channel 30, and give us the word ‘Pines,’ and your location, and we'll be there in a snap. Though I think you guys will be able to take whatever comes at you.”

The twins nod in agreement with their great uncles. “Yeah, we're going to be fine,” Mabel states. Dipper chuckles and scoffs, “Yeah, I mean, we can take whatever this hotel throws at us!” In response. Wendy raises a fist in the air and whoops in cheer for their plan.

From the vents of the room, Abaddon peeks his head out from the vent, eyes narrowed and confused. He only heard the end of the conversation, so he didn't have very much built-up context. What were they planning? Whatever it was, he wasn't going to let them do anything that could harm his family. Abaddon slunk back into the vents and redirected himself to head towards Esther's room.

He pulled himself out of the vent and looked up at Esther, who was attempting to read the book she had found earlier again. Noticing Abaddon, she waved him over. “Hey, Abaddon, could you translate what this says? I think it's a summoning spell!” Abaddon stares blankly at the book before speaking.

“I think the guests who arrived earlier have wicked intentions. I've heard them conversing about handling whatever the hotel throws at them.” He turns away dramatically and clenches his fist. “I especially suspect that boy to be planning something nefarious. Something about him infuriates me in a way I don't understand.”

Esther gives him a look of confusion. “What about that guy specifically?” Abaddon grimaces. “I'm not sure, but I can sense he doesn't take a liking to me either, now, are you not concerned with what I've just told you?” He sighs and turns back to Esther fully. “If you help me with this investigation, I promise to translate the deepest secrets of the book you hold.”

This immediately causes Esther to slam the book shut with enthusiasm. “Hey, you had me before your promise! Come on, let's see if you're right about the guests.” “Alright,” Abaddon opens her door and gestures towards it, “we'll stake out their rooms until they leave and thoroughly search them.” Esther nods in agreement, and they rush down the hall.