Archive of Our Own ^beta

It would be a lie to say that Asahi wasn’t at all sad at the fact that ArcLands collaboration with WonderlandsxShowtime was ending. They were a group that he admired greatly and they had been so kind and friendly towards him and the rest of his troupe mates. He hadn’t met too many troupes who would have spared him such kindness, and extend that kindness outside of the hours where they worked on their plays. Despite how much popularity he had gained, he would be a fool to not notice how other actors wouldn’t seem to be too fond of him, especially when he’s been observing people and their behaviours for so long.

That isn’t to say that all the actors he’s collaborated with were explicitly mean to him. He had only met five or maybe six people who had despised him that much. Most of which he had met before joining ArcLand when he hadn’t even entered high school yet. The actors he met when collaborating with other troupes would acknowledge him and his ideas, they would talk to him, respect him and give feedback and compliments where it was necessary or deserved. That’s how everything would often start. After a while it seemed that they would avoid him. He could remember the times where they would flat out ignore him when talking casually with his troupe mates. If they were speaking to him, there was a good chance it was only work related.

Asahi wasn’t one to pressure people into being friends with him. No matter how much he wanted to be friends with some of the people he worked with, there wasn’t a world where doing that would end well. He came to accept that they avoided trying to establish anything more than an acquaintanceship. He knew exactly why.

He was weird.

He wasn’t what they expected he’d be like.

He got too passionate about his line of work.

He took things too seriously.

He was childish.

He was a liability.

At least he remembers hearing all of those things being told to him at school by his classmates, teachers and some of the instructors at the acting workshops he would attend. In that sense he was very grateful that his own troupe accepted him for everything he was. He could confidently call them his friends and they called him their friend.

So to him, WonderlandxShowtime was a huge subversion of his expectations. He was ready to have left this collaboration, grateful that he had at least been able to meet and work alongside the theatre troupe he admired so much. Nothing more than pleasantries and perhaps a peak at their work ethic would be shared and that would have to be enough.

Instead he was leaving this collaboration feeling spoiled by the genuine friendship he had developed with them, mainly with Rui and Tsukasa if he was going to be honest. They weren’t like any of the other troupes he had worked with. He felt so seen, so at home with them. He didn’t want to be mean but he knows that if they had gone to the same school as him, they wouldn’t be spared from any of the comments and insults he had gotten.

Tsukasa was their leader and an incredible actor at that. He was quite the character just as himself. He never left a single interaction feeling bored and he seemed to match his energy. One day he’d have to see him getting all the recognition he deserves. As he put it himself, he’s a “future star in the making!”

Emu was an undeniable ray of sunshine. He certainly never felt like she saw him as someone she shouldn’t be befriending. She made sure to spark up friendly conversation whenever it was possible which made Asahi happier than he would be willing to admit to them.

Nene didn’t seem to want to talk much but Rui explained from the start that she was shy and it would take some time for her to warm up to them so he didn’t fault her at all. Again, if she didn’t want to be friends with him, he wouldn’t force her to be. She still interacted with him like he was a normal person. She wouldn’t single him out of anything. That was far more than enough to be happy with. She just wasn’t much for talking to people and that was entirely understandable.

Then there was Rui. Oh, he was something else entirely. He was elegant, sly, cunning, smart, kind, charismatic, Asahi could go on forever talking about him. How he looked like he was constantly plotting new ideas and his little Cheshire Cat like smile that made him look so smug and knowing of what he was doing. His outfit for Phoenix Wonderland looked amazing too. That colourful coat of his just fit him so well. It always looked weird when he took it off. He didn’t look bad in just the black button up waistcoat and blue undershirt but it looked so colourless and devoid of life that he had while wearing the overcoat. He just looked good in vibrant colors. Asahi ended up wondering quite a few times how he’d look with shades of turquoise in his outfits.

Not that he needed to elaborate any further on how much he likes the guy, Rui is a phenomenal director with a creative mind he can’t help but admire whenever they work. He wasn't biased towards anyone when casting or when giving lines and stage directions, he truly just wanted to make the best show possible with what could be provided. The exact thing he had seen from another director who had saved him when he was so little.

Asahi tensed.

He treasured that memory as much as he wanted it to be forgotten and never remembered.

He would have never become the actor he was if it hadn’t been for Tom Gray and his inspiring show. He would have never adopted the same worldview he had now or his goal to help make the lives of those who are suffering at least a little lighter. The various films and shows the director had created were masterpieces in their own right. An absolute marvel of modern film and theater. Someone whose works should be studied and used as examples of how to make an impression, how to connect to people. He found so much joy and comfort in all his works because of it. Sometimes when life got the better of him, he found himself rewatching his favorite films or shows from Tom.

At the same time he would have never had to put up with all the hate, prejudice and torment at school and at work if he had never gotten stuck in the crossfire of that stupid war.

He would have never developed that stupid disorder that pilots him like a broken marionette every time he even gets a slight mention of a war. Every scare of conflict in the news sends him in hysterics, every firework, firecracker, sometimes it even just takes the pop of a balloon to make him cry his eyes out until they hurt. He never would have had to hide a part of himself to avoid all the stares, insufferably ignorant or downright rude questions, hateful words or even attacks. He was sixteen when it all came to a head and he couldn’t hide it from his parents anymore. Up until then he had been too afraid of telling them. They finally took him to a hospital to get the official diagnosis and treatment.

“Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.”

He was disgusted by the label. It had only meant that everyone who had called him weird or a freak was right. Two years of treatment later and support from his friends and family, he managed to find peace with it. It was a part of him and denying it didn’t do any good. That being said, he didn’t exactly fail to mention it to WonderlandsxShowtime by accident.

He seconded the very show that would cause him to lose the most sleep in a month than he had since he went to his old school. Thanks to his classmates and acting skills he had learned how to hide his panic attacks for the most part. So long as nothing was done without him expecting it, he should be able to get away without raising any suspicion from any of them.

His troupe was understanding enough to talk to him about the selection of the show when they were alone. As much as they argued that they could ask to change the show without mentioning him whatsoever, Asahi wanted to keep doing The Two Androids. It meant he could prove he was normal. He knew the story, he had read it twice. He would finally get a chance to prove he wasn’t a liability to his troupe. They didn’t need to make sure a play didn’t have themes of war, explosion or guns.
They could do any show they pleased.

They ended up deciding that if they saw or thought that he couldn’t handle the performance at any point within the first week, they’d ask Rui to change the show to something else, no exceptions. They couldn’t risk performing a terrible show all because he wanted to prove something. Asahi agreed to the terms. He couldn’t let his wants ruin a play that they were working so hard on. It wouldn’t be fair to anyone, he at least knew that.

So with the watchful eye of his teammates they performed The Two Androids. Sure Asahi had many more nightmares but all everyone saw was that he ended almost each and every day tired from having put in so much energy into making the show come to life.

Even so, he had so much fun putting on that play. Even if his chest felt unusually tight in rehearsals, he still loved every second of it. WXS were that pleasant to be around. He got to help Tsukasa become a better actor and he got to improve some of his acting style too by observing the four of them working. Even if the flashbacks brought tears to his eyes, he would still be smiling at the troupe of teens and showering them with praise for their work.

That now left them at the end of their final performance of The Two Androids. Sad as always that the show must come to an end but hey, for once he befriended the troupe he was working with. He had even managed to get Rui’s number since they had been Emailing each other the entire time before. Rui had even given Asahi’s number to Tsukasa so they could stay in touch as well! Though it certainly scared him half to death when he initially saw a text from an unknown number talking in detail about their performance that day.

A small custom of theatrical performances was afterparties. A way of celebrating what had been accomplished. Every troupe does them differently but the same general idea still applies. The way Asahi saw it most of the time, it was a way to finally make peace with the fact that their work had come to an end while still being able to revel in it for a final time before eventually starting the new production. There was one small problem with the after parties held by his troupe.

Alcohol.

Asahi wasn’t of the age where he was allowed to drink. He was eighteen, still technically doing school and the legal drinking age of Japan is twenty. He had no problem with this. The drinks smelled horrible and according to every single person who has drank alcohol that he has asked, it tastes just as bad and even the sweeter ones apparently burn down your throat since they have a higher concentration of the stuff. Not only that but he would hate to become the stereotypical mentally ill person who turned to alcohol to cope with their problems. Both sentiments steered him far from ever wanting to touch a single beer, wine glass or cocktail. That being said, everyone else in his troupe was now of the age where they could choose to drink and they regularly held after parties at bars. It wasn’t inherently a bad thing. They never pressured him into drinking and in all honesty playing drinking games was fun. Without the drinking part, he was just playing games with his friends. The problem came when they all got drunk to the point where they didn’t exactly want to talk or do anything, or when they went to bars with other troupes.

Another important discovery was that people who don’t necessarily like you to begin with can be much more unpleasant to be around when drunk. He’s gotten told to go away, that he shouldn’t be allowed to be with all the adults or the rare occasions where they’d ask him if he was interested in trying a drink or mock him for getting a soda instead of something alcoholic. Usually one of his troupe mates would step in and tell them off for even suggesting that.

However, since everyone in WonderlandsxShowtime isn’t of age either, they can’t just bring them all to a bar and get drunk while they just sit there. Then came the golden solution. ArcLand holds their after party separate from WonderlandsxShowtime, with the exception of Asahi who joins them. Everyone agreed on it. He couldn’t be happier.

By the time they had finished their final performance it was too late in the day to hold a party. Considering how tired everyone was and how Rui, Tsukasa, Emu and Nene had to take the train back home and it wasn’t a short train ride either.

They had decided to meet up at the entrance of Phoenix Wonderland at four in the afternoon the next day. They hold their after parties at one of their houses and it was Emu’s turn to host them though she had something to take care of at PXL so she asked them if they could meet up there and walk to her place.

Asahi was impatiently waiting at the main entrance to the nation's famous park. He paced around in an area a few meters away from the crowds lining up to enter the park. He told himself that morning that he wouldn’t get paranoid about being late or if the party was cancelled or if they didn’t find him and end up going assuming he just didn’t show up. His worries quickly came to a close when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder.

”Hello!” Emu beamed. The sudden appearance startled him, causing him to jump but he laughed it off and gave his greetings to the girl.

“Oh hey! Didn’t see you there.” He chuckled, clutching his heart.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” She said in a friendly manner.

“Eh, it’s all in good fun right?” Asahi wondered if Emu had ever even had bad intentions. At all. The entire time he’s known her he’s never seen her in a state that wasn’t energetic and positive.

“Mhm!” Emu gave an energetic nod. “My brothers were in a meeting so I went over to give them all the cookies I made before we went to the sciences museum!” She recalled while placing her hands on her hips, clearly happy with what she’d accomplished.

“Aw well isn’t that sweet of you to do for them.”

“Hehe, yeah!” Her eyes widened for a moment before she fixed her gaze on him. “Oh! I just realized I never asked you if you have any siblings.” She tilted her head to one side.

“Oh, I’m an only child.” He said curtly. There was nothing much to it.

“Do you have any pets?” Emu asked, keeping the subject similar to the last question.

“My parents have fish back at their house. They keep a few different types of fish in there” He recalled times where he would simply watch the fish in all their serenity. How they’d swim around the tank or interact with each other. It was rather relaxing.

“That’s so wonderhoy!” She exclaimed. Stars almost seemed to light up in her eyes. “What kind of fish were they? Do you have the ones that are pretty with their fins all big and like wooshwoosh?” She used her hands to do some kind of flowing movement.

“No, we didn't ever have fish like that. Mom didn’t exactly like betta fish, thought they looked funny. The main fish there were guppies though we also had a couple of snails and a butterfly loach. It’s a kinda sucker fish. The ones that are all flat on the underside and stick to literally everything in the tank you know?.” Emu gave a nod and was watching him very attentively. Asahi found himself unable to not smile. “Though back to the guppies, they’re really small and cute but sometimes they zip around the fish tank so much that sometimes I thought they were racing each other around the tank.” He recalled fondly.

“Aww! That’s so cute! They’re the zippy zip zip fish then.” She seemed to make that a mental note.

“Exactly!” Asahi brought his hands close to his chest, brimming with energy.

Emu’s phone buzzed in her pocket. She picked it out to see the notification on her screen and promptly told Asahi that Nene and Rui would arrive shortly. By the time she finished speaking the two had popped up behind them like they had teleported to them for the sole purpose of scaring them. Yet again Asahi had jumped at the surprise.

“Oh, it seems we caught you off guard.” Rui teased with his signature smirk.

“That makes it the second time we’ve said hello by spooking him.” Emu giggled.

“Just wait until Tsukasa makes it a third time. Knowing how loud he is, I wouldn't be surprised if he sent one of us into cardiac arrest.” Nene scrunched up her face a bit but her words were meant light-heartedly.

At their arrival a painful memory re entered Asahi’s mind as he looked towards Rui. The evening before, where he had extended his offer for Rui to join ArcLand. At first he thought that offering such a position could do no harm. If Rui accepted, then ArcLand got a new and extremely talented member whose goals and aspirations in life aligned with his own. What he ended up noticing was that he had only given Rui the toughest ultimatum ever. To choose to be with his friends or follow his dream. He felt like such a jerk. A horrible person. He should have listened to his troupemates. He should have just asked them to change the play to something that wouldn’t cause him mental fatigue. He shouldn’t have offered Rui such a position only a day before the show and while he was in a different troupe consisting of friends he clearly cared about deeply.

He really hoped it wouldn’t have too much of an effect on him. He hoped he wouldn’t hate him for it. He hoped he wouldn’t end up changing his behaviour towards his friends in any way. He seemed like he was in pain thinking about having to leave his friends. He just hoped things could stay the same as they were. Asahi doesn’t need to think that hard about it to know how painful it must feel.

With all that being said, Rui looked normal. Nothing was off about him in any way.

He quickly shoves the thoughts to the back of his mind. He gave Rui until his graduation so that he would have more time to spend time with his own troupe and have a good think over it. Rui doesn’t have to accept the offer if he doesn’t want to so he and he’s given him plenty of time to decide. He shouldn’t regret asking. Besides, he spent too much time looking forward to seeing him again to be thinking about avoiding him.

Right at four, Tsukasa came sprinting to the group. He came to a halt right in front of them, only a few inches from crashing right into Nene.

“I’m so sorry I’m late! I was on my way before I realised I forgot my phone and then had to run back to get it and then run all the way here.” He explained with a defeated look on his face.

“Actually you’re right on the dot. It’s four o’clock.” Rui chuckled.

“Huh?” A nearby clock that was held up in the center of the entrance of Phoenix Wonderland. Its minute hand was pointed to the twelve and the hour hand was pointing to the four. “Aha! It seems I remain as punctual as ever!” Tsukasa stood up tall and put a hand on his chest.

“Well didn’t you arrive thirty minutes late to a-” The future star put a hand to Nene’s mouth before she could utter another word.

“That was under more dire circumstances.” He excused himself. Nene rolled her eyes before taking his hand off her mouth.

“Anyways, should we get going?” Emu refocused the group on what they even met up for. Everyone nodded their heads as the pink girl led the way to her home from the amusement park. In reality Asahi was the only one who hadn’t been to her house so he was the one who needed someone to point him in the right direction. They all let Emu lead the way regardless. Nene and Tsukasa walked a little behind her while Rui and Asahi were all the way at the back.

“It isn’t too long of a walk.” Emu directed that to Asahi as they turned a corner. He smiled and nodded in return.

“It’s a real shame we won’t get to work on any shows with you for the foreseeable future.” Tsukasa turned his head to look back to face Asahi.

“Yeah, it’s been so long since I’ve had this much fun partnering with another troupe like this.” Asahi remarked with a sad smile. Unbeknownst to him, Rui raised an eyebrow at the statement. “I just hope I’ll be able to hang out with you guys after this. You guys are all really nice to be around.”

“Let’s not get all sentimental before we’ve even started the afterparty.” Nene interrupted.

“Nene is right. Besides, I have no doubt that we’ll be able to do just that.” Rui put a reassuring hand on Asahi’s shoulder. That action alone gave him comfort to no end. Subconsciously or not, he leaned into the touch. “Maybe we should go see a show together sometime soon.”

“That’d be amazing!” Asahi almost jumped in excitement.

“Seems like a plan then.” Rui took his hand off of the boy’s shoulder and buried it in the pockets of his hoodie. “Now the question is which play we should aim to see.” He placed his other hand on his chin before flashing Asahi a playful smirk. All worries of Rui hating him dissipated.

A conversation around which shows, plays and musicals were being performed in the coming months and their opinions on each of the plays ensued. The rest of the world had faded to the back of their mind as they each delved into their shared interest. Tsukasa, Nene and Emu also weighed in their opinions every now and then, though they were also maintaining their own conversation which left the two boys to chat to each other mostly uninterrupted.

This was another reason Asahi liked Rui so much. They just got along so well. They not only liked shows but they both had an affinity for a certain director. Rui even admitted that his directing style was heavily influenced by Tom Gray. So with such a fascination for his works, Asahi inadvertently shifted the conversation to his films and they both gushed about their favourite films, certain scenes that left an impact on them or parts they just thought were really cool.

The entire time Asahi noticed that his gaze would linger on Rui longer than it needed to. He wanted to hold his hand or walk a little closer to him much more than he would have with his other friends. An unfamiliar feeling came about. He was completely engrossed in whatever the boy was saying and paid almost no attention to anything else. There were a handful of times where they bumped into Nene and Tsukasa because they had come to a crossing and the light was red. He was so focused on the conversation that before he had even realised it, they had arrived at Emu’s house.

Asahi figured that Emu’s family was pretty wealthy considering they owned Phoenix Wonderland. You can’t be the owners of a nationally famous amusement park and not be at least a little rich. Nonetheless, he still wasn’t prepared to be met with an entire modern mansion-esque building as they passed the gates that lead into a neatly decorated garden area. His mouth was agape at what was now the third shock he’s gotten that day.

Having noticed the surprised expression on his face, Rui took his hand and placed it under Asah’s chin and gently pushed up, closing his mouth.

“That was about the same reaction we had when we first came here.” He chuckled, his hand lingered for a second, fingers tracing against his jawline before he took his hand back. Asahi could feel his face redden at the touch. The inventor must have noticed it because he appeared like he was holding back laughter when looking back at him.

They entered the household and made themselves comfortable in the living room as Emu dashed off to the kitchen with Rui to get snacks and drinks. Once they returned, Rui took up a spot right next to Asahi. Without much thought he leaned on the taller boy, resting his head on his shoulder. In return Rui put an arm around his shoulders. Asahi took a mental note of how nice it felt to be this close up with him and how Rui seemed to be completely unbothered by how affectionate he was.

“The afterparty shall commence!” Tsukasa stood up from his spot on the couch next to Nene and opened his arms wide as if to present something.

“Shouldn’t Emu be the one saying that? It’s her house.” Nene grabbed the edge of Tsukasa’s blouse and dragged him back onto the couch.

“Hm, I don’t mind so long as everyone’s having fun.” Emu said through a mouthful of chips which got a laugh out of the group. “Should we put something on the TV or should we play something?” Emu asked them all.

“Well what games can we play exactly?” Nene asked.

“I know a few drinking games.” Asahi added. The statement raised a few eyebrows, mainly from Rui who still had an arm around the boy. He could feel his arm tense a bit around him.

“Drinking games?” He questioned.

“Ok it I know it sounds bad but to be clear I’ve never had anything alcoholic and my troupe has never pressured me to. I learnt the games from my troupe since they’re all allowed to drink but they’re pretty fun without the drinking part.” He clarified.

“I suppose that makes sense.” Rui’s arm loosened.

“You sure gave us a scare though.” Tsukasa had a relieved look on his face.

“Fair enough! I probably would have been a bit concerned if one of you guys said the same.” Asahi chuckled.

“Now I’m curious what drinking games are like.” Nene leaned forward in her seat. “I’ve never exactly played one, for obvious reasons.”

“Me too!” Emu cheered excitedly.

“It wouldn’t do any harm to try one out, no? The only drinks we have are different kinds of soda so it should be fine.” Rui reasoned.

“We can take out the ‘having to drink something if you lose’ rule. It’s still pretty fun regardless.”

“Alright then, what game do you have in mind?” Tsukasa asked. Asahi put a hand to his chin and hummed. He then snapped back to his usual state.

“Got one! It’s called ‘Spoons’ and it goes a little something like this,” He cleared his throat and began to explain the rules of the game.

“How it works is that you need a card deck and enough spoons for everyone except one person, like how in musical chairs you need to have enough chairs so that one person is left out. Everyone starts with four cards and cards are passed around the table. You can take a card or pass it on but if you take one you have to give one of the cards you have away so you’ll always have four. You have to try and get four of one card. So for example your entire hand could be made of six’s, king’s, ace’s or whatever. Once you do that you can take a spoon and once one person has taken a spoon everyone is allowed to take one and the person left without one loses. Does that make sense?” Looking around at everyone, they seemed to be a little puzzled over the works of the game.

“How about a practice round?” It would probably be the best course of action so that they could all figure out how it was played. Everyone agreed and Emu ran over to get spoons from the kitchen. A card deck was kept in a drawer with board games and such so Tsukasa simply fetched the deck from there as instructed to by the pink girl.

Being the only one who knew the game, Asahi ended up being the dealer who started the round. Four cards were given to everyone and he started by picking up a card, looking at it and passing it over to Tsukasa who was sitting to his left. Tsukasa picked up and inspected the card but in the meantime Asahi had already given him three more cards.

“A little warning, this game is normally pretty fast paced.” He handed over the fifth card to Tsukasa.

“Tsukasa hurry up before he ends up getting a set.” Nene elbowed Tsukasa who yelped in response. He swiftly exchanged one of his cards for the one he was holding and slipped the card to Nene.

The cards were passed around the table in a speedy clockwise chain. After less than a minute Nene hastily but discreetly swiped a spoon from the center of the table where they laid. She held it close to her chest and observed as no one else motioned for the center of the table. Looking around at everyone else they were giving their attention to the cards. It felt right to tell them that they were allowed to take a spoon but before she could open her mouth Asahi looked up and saw her holding a spoon and in the blink of an eye swiped another from the center. Two spoons left. At the metal clanking of the utensil everyone looked up from their cards. Now everyone finally noticed. Emu and Rui’s reflexes were fast enough to land them a spoon but Tsukasa was left without one.

“I was waiting for someone to notice.” Nene chuckled as she gave Tsukasa a playful side eye.

“It’s not my fault I lost! Rui practically pulled a spoon right out of my hand!” He complained.

“I pulled it off of the table. It just so happened that your hand was on top of it and had a weak grip.” Rui held the spoon out and pointed it tauntingly towards the blond.

“My grip was not weak! You yanked it straight out of my hand with the force of a thousand men!” The comment sent a wave of laughter through the table, causing Emu to drop her spoon on the floor momentarily.

“I’ve got to hand it to you Asahi, this is a pretty fun game.” Rui’s hand moved to place his spoon back in the center of the table and then to his chin as he turned to look at Asahi.

“I’m glad you think it’s fun.” A warm feeling started to embed itself in Asahi’s chest. It spread to his cheeks as Rui smiled back at him.

Similar words of approval were voiced by the rest. Even Tsukasa admitted that he found the game stimulating. With such a positive reception they all decided to play a few more rounds. They ended up playing six in total, some rounds were quicker than others. Tsukasa only managed to not lose once. Nene had the quickest reaction time which helped her secure a winning spot every game. Asahi was close behind since he actually had experience in the game. Emu and Rui were tied in reaction timing and Tsukasa ended up simply focusing on the cards too much and then losing track of the spoons. He only won a victory at the end because Rui managed to do the exact same thing and had only looked up from his deck after all the spoons had been taken.

It was a different troupe but Asahi still loved seeing everyone smile. The fact that a game he suggested was being well received was culminating into a bubble of pride inside him. He’d cherish these moments with his new friends.

After those rounds they decided to shift to a different game but before properly doing so they got side tracked by talking about the show they had put on. Asahi stayed quiet throughout most of it. He was able to hold it together during rehearsals but he worried he might break his character if the conversation stuck on the subject for too long or leaned towards the darker themes. It would have been a waste to have to go through hiding it all that time if he were to snap at the after party. In attempts to stop himself from reacting too strongly to anything, he ended up zoning out entirely. Staring a hole into the wall, or maybe the blank TV, or maybe a window? For all he knew he could be staring into Emu's very soul since she sat across from him. His mind had gone completely blank until there was an intruding sound of the snap of someone's fingers directly in front of his face.

“Earth to Asahi. Earth to Asahi.” Emu called out.

“What?” Was the only response he could muster. Rui stopped the snapping and retracted his hand.

“Geez, you’re even worse than Tsukasa.” Nene commented. Asahi tilted his head to one side. Did Tsukasa have a habit of zoning out? Giving it some more thought, he did notice that sometimes he’d be awfully quiet and with a very concentrated look on his face when they were rehearing The Two Androids.

“Wha- Nene!” Tsukasa stumbled on his words. He crossed his arms and turned his head away in mock annoyance. “I can’t believe you’d say something like that.” His tone was just overdramatic enough to tell he was acting. This elicited a laugh from Nene who proceeded to elbow the boy again, though it looked like she had barely even made contact with him. This was still enough to make Tsukasa jump in his seat.

“You’re such a drama queen.” The green haired girl teased with a smile. Although their antics had distracted the two of them, Emu and Rui still kept an eye on Asahi.

“Are you still tired?” Rui made it a point to make eye contact with him.

“No. What do you mean by still tired though?” He asked.

“How I remember it, you got tired after almost every rehearsal by the end of the month.” Emu put emphasis on the word ‘every’, stretching it out and making a great rolling motion with her head before turning back to look at Asahi.

“Not as much as us but it was still noticeable.” Nene added.

“Oh yeah. You are right about that though.” It’s not like he’d tell them why he was exhausted but if he admitted to at least remembering being tired then he probably wouldn’t raise any suspicion. “I got pretty sleepy there huh?”

“So much so that you fell asleep on me during one of the rehearsals.” A knowing smirk appeared on Rui’s face. He leaned forward and rested his head in his hands. Asahi blinked a few times.

“This isn’t some attempt to gaslight me right? I wasn’t that exhausted. I know that for a fact." He laughed off what the boy had said.

“No, no, no. Do you not remember?” His voice was laced with mild surprise.

“No? I don’t remember doing that.” He spoke cautiously. He didn’t know if that kind of a response would elicit more questioning or concern from any of them though he hoped to avoid it.

“I can confirm it did happen,” Nene added. “Because I went to ask Rui about something in the script and when I found him, I saw you sleeping with your head on his lap.” Asahi covered his face with his hands. The heat from them only helped his face grow higher in temperature.

“I am so sorry.” His voice was muffled but radiated embarrassment.

“No need to apologize.” He couldn’t see him but he chuckled while he spoke. “Besides, holding on to you wasn’t that much of a bother.” The play-flirting did not help whatsoever.

“Yeah you were petting his hair like he was a cat.” Nene continued to add details that Asahi wished she had kept to herself for the sake of his sanity at that moment. He still covered his face so he lost the opportunity to gauge Rui’s reaction to Nene’s comment though he could hear everyone else laughing at it except for him so maybe he was embarrassed by it in some way? Although he wouldn’t consider that action fairly intimate, he could tell that most other people would consider it so. If he was embarrassed maybe that was the reason why. He couldn’t immediately assume that Rui like-liked him.

Fortunately for Asahi, the others took pity on him, possibly even Rui, and changed the subject of conversation soon after. For that he was thankful he wouldn’t have to suffer through any more humiliation. They eventually landed on the idea of playing another game and this time they went with Emu’s suggestion. Werewolf, but everyone has to sort of pantomime a character based on what their card was. Since it would make the werewolf too obvious, the villager and werewolf roles were wildcards and could be any role the player chose to put on. Oftentimes, they would end up both playing villager roles, pretending they had a farm or cattle to take care of.

Asahi wasn’t quite sure that the game would play out too well but it was surprisingly fun, though he had come to expect such things with these people. He was convinced they could make anything fun if they set their mind to it. There was definitely fun to be had with the character whiplash that would occur. Tsukasa, who had been loud the entire time, being a scared little village girl and then being an overconfident sheriff was a blast. Although he had seen Nene be more outgoing it had been under a script so he was very curious as to how she would act when doing improv. Unsurprisingly, she did pretty well. Rui was also quite adept at fitting into the different roles but he maintained a consistent aura to him. Though that may just be because of the way he admires him, he couldn’t tell.

At one point Emu had completely strayed from her usual character. She spoke in a low, almost whispering voice and always stared just to the side of people which made her eyes look empty and made it feel like she wasn’t actually talking to them but something else behind them which was incredibly unsettling. He was so confused by it that his immediate assumption was that she was the werewolf, only to later find out she had been assigned as the psychic which made so much more sense he felt a little dumb for not getting that earlier.

Afterwards they played a few more rounds of various card games before settling on watching something on the TV once it got late. Since no one had any ideas of what to watch, Emu decided to go on Youtube and surf the recommended section until they saw something they liked or someone got an idea on something to watch that everyone was on board with.

“Why are there so many gaming videos in your recommended section?” Tsukasa questioned Emu with a confused expression.

“Nene came over a little while ago and showed me some Let’s Plays of some of the games she liked since her console was out of battery and the charger for it was at her house.” She explained casually.

“How many did you watch? There’s at least one on each row of videos!” Asahi couldn’t keep track of them. They were mostly fighting or combat oriented games, or at least that’s what they looked like from the thumbnails. He could recognize a few of them, namely Splatoon, Ultrakill, Genshin Impact and Final Fantasy which are normally classified more as an RPG than a combat game but there is a lot of combat involved.

As the others began to talk about the games, and by others it’s mostly Nene talking, Asahi began to disassociate once more. Although he could tolerate action and fighting, certain imagery or weapons irked him. Specifically the sight of guns and other firearms. They made him tense in his seat. Vivid images of fighting, gunfire and calamity flashed through his mind as he saw some of the thumbnails showcasing violent scenes he couldn’t help but associate to war. To avoid any further panic he fixed his gaze at the drawers below the television. His mind went completely blank as tunnel vision set in and he could only hope that he didn’t look off to everyone else again.

He couldn’t tell if a few seconds or a few minutes had gone by but he was brought back to the present time by Nene’s voice.

“Wait, the new Dying Light game is out already!?” She sounded positively appalled and her voice was much higher than usual.

“Dying Light?” Emu’s curiosity was peaked by the title though she seemed more interested out of some kind of fear. Maybe some of these fighting games scared her. Sad topics did seem to upset her easily enough. He remembered her reaction to the story of The Two Androids and although he could tell she found the story interesting and fun to play, she seemed a little put down by the darker themes in the tale. It reminded him of how he had reacted upon reading the story for the first time. He loved the writing and story telling but was crying while reading most of it. Even after reading it again to try and overcome his fear the tears he shed over the book only increased dramatically.

“It’s a zombie apocalypse type game. There’s parkour elements as well as fighting elements and I’ve had an eye out for it ever since they announced the new game but I haven’t even gotten around to playing any one of the previous games yet.” Nene began to complain.

“From what I heard the new game can actually be a good starting point for people who’ve never played any of their games before.” Tsukasa weighed in the information with a smile, in hopes of cheering Nene up a little.

“How do you know about Dying Light? I didn’t think those were your type of games.” Nene narrowed her eyes at the boy.

“You mentioned it in passing before and I looked into it since the way you described it made it sound interesting.” He put his hands up in defense under the scrutinizing stare of the girl.

“Well, was it interesting?” Rui asked.

“Actually it was. I watched a couple of Let's Plays of it and enjoyed it very much.” Tsukasa said in a ‘matter-of-fact’ way of speaking.

“Suppose that elicits the age old question doesn’t it?” Rui looked over to everyone else for a response. To his dismay, everyone only gave him a puzzled glance in response.

“What would you do in a zombie apocalypse? Wasn’t that obvious?” He raised his arms as if to say ‘duh’.

“That was not obvious at all.” Tsukasa deadpanned.

“Hasn’t everyone talked about that with their friends at some point though?” Rui continued to protest.

“Yeah but that isn’t the ‘age old question’.” Tsukasa air quoted while continuing to give Rui a deadpan expression.

“Then what is it?” The room stayed completely silent. “Then I say that title belongs to the question of ‘What would you do in a zombie apocalypse.’” He crossed his arms with mock annoyance just to be petty.

“It’s kind of just a broad term for questions that get asked a lot isn’t it? I’ve heard like a dozen speeches in class where the person speaking referred to a question as that before revealing what it actually is.” Tsukasa began to argue.

“Yeah like, we’ve all heard the age old question, and then insert question that’s asked a lot.” Nene backed him up.

“I’ve even used the saying myself for several different questions when we had to write speeches for class.” Tsukasa argued back. Asahi nodded along.

“Too late, Rui’s decided it now.” Emu joked.

“So can I start or?” The purple haired boy spoke up eagerly.

“Hey Asahi you’ve been quiet for a while, you wanna start?” Tsukasa said with an outgoing tone.

“You sounded like a teacher just then.” Nene deadpanned.

“EH- I did not!” Though it quickly dawned on Tsukasa just how his words did indeed come across as phrases a teacher would say and he promptly gave up on arguing back.

Asahi was hesitant to give his answer. He had known the answer for a while. It applied to all apocalypse or catastrophic events, fictional or not. They didn’t have to know that part though. He felt like if he told them it wouldn’t be too outlandish but he could also see the conversation turning in ways he wouldn’t want it to go. He could always stall.

“Uh I don’t know. Realistically I’d probably stay at home and block myself in. I’m way too much of a scaredy cat to even try to go outside.” He wasn’t exactly lying yet. It was a very typical answer so it shouldn’t warrant skepticism.

“Guess everyone does have that in their answer in some regard. One of the worst decisions to make during the start of a zombie outbreak is to go outside since there’s so much chaos that there is a much higher chance of being infected.” Nene mumbled.

“Yeah I guess I’d do that too.” Emu admitted.

“Same here.” Tsukasa agreed. Rui hummed and gave a curt nod.

“So then what exactly would you do afterwards?” Rui directed the question to Asahi.

He still hadn’t figured out whether or not he wanted to risk saying his answer. His mind drew a blank at any kind of lie. He could always pretend like he didn’t know but then they’d most likely pressure him to come up with an answer and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to come up with a convincing lie. He hated apocalypse scenarios. He tried to give them as little thought as possible because they reminded him so much of the dumb war he got caught in. How he felt like the world was ending, everyone had lost their humanity and acted cruel and hostile towards one another. Fear and paranoia haunted everyone as they simply sat and waited to be found, or for something bad to happen.

“Kill myself.” He blurted out the answer after having been quiet for longer than he would have liked. “I would kill myself.” All at once Asahi wanted to hit himself over the head with a wooden plank. The room went dead silent, he could hear the buzzing of the living room lights that they had turned on once it had gotten dark outside. Everyone was staring directly at him. They were completely speechless, eyes wide in shock. He felt sick to his stomach.

“I just don’t think I’d be able to handle a situation like that. I mean I can’t imagine how terrifying or painful it’d be to be mauled or turned into a zombie. Besides, if I’m already dead I can’t be turned into one right? Since they go after living brains. Guess it can really depend on the show or game you’re playing, but I’m pretty sure in most cases I wouldn’t be part of the horde. It’d give me some peace of mind to know I wouldn’t be the cause of someone else being zombi-fied.” He tried to talk his way out of the situation, explaining it in an awkward tone. Nervous laughter was the only noise that permeated the room.

“That is a fair argument. I guess the likelihood of us all surviving in an apocalypse isn’t exactly high.” Rui reasoned. Asahi couldn’t ignore how his eyes narrowed on him. It was like he was trying to see through him. To spot something off.

“I mean I know a lot of other people would probably do the same. Thinking about these kinds of scenarios just makes me feel kinda sad.” His voice dropped as his hope to save himself from the spotlight faded. The silence was suffocating him.

“So what would you guys do? I’m sure you’re much braver than I am.” He laughed anxiously. The last desperate attempt to direct the limelight onto someone else.

“Um, I’d probably move to Rui’s garage since that’s where he’s got all his robots and stuff, and I’m sure he’d be able to make some sort of anti-zombie robot or something.” Nene spoke up. Her cadence when she spoke was unsteady and she sounded unsure. If only it was possible to go back a few seconds in time like they were films. Such a reaction from them should have been foreseen. He brought his knees up to his chest and stared shamefully off to the side. He desperately wanted to avoid meeting anyone's gaze.

“Oh I just realized how late it’s gotten.” Emu exclaimed, glancing out the window only to be met with the panels of glass showing a pitch black plane like a TV would when it’s turned off. She then peered over to a clock in the kitchen. “It’s ten fourty-five, it’s really late. Maybe we shouldn’t watch something. I wouldn’t want to wake my family up.”

“Is it sleepover time then?” Rui asked.

“Guess so.” Emu visibly brightened up at the words.

“Huh?” Asahi looked around at everyone helplessly.

“Oh right, so most of our afterparties end up turning into sleepovers.” Nene explained quickly.

“Sorry we didn’t warn you before. We really try our best not to stay over too late but then we do and end up spending the night at the place of whoever’s hosting.” Tsukasa elaborated, gazing apologetically towards Asahi.

“I’m sure I have extra stuff for you if you want to stay the night with us.” Emu offered. Her eyes beamed at the prospect of having someone else join the after party turned sleepover.

As much as he wanted to leave with how poorly his last interaction had gone, he also desperately wanted to stay. By that point he was too mentally exhausted to want to leave. He felt warm in their presence anyhow.

Emu hastily made off to the kitchen to get something more nutritional then chips, cookies and other such snacks for them to eat. Even if it was a small meal she felt as if she had to give them all something to call a proper dinner. The others quickly texted their parents to inform them that they were staying over at Emu’s. By the fact that no one had mentioned earlier that their parents wanted them to leave at a certain time, Asahi could at least guess they had become aware of the pattern of afterparties turning into sleepovers.

Asahi thought he could text his parents too but remembered how late it was and didn’t want to wake them up if they were sleeping. They made sure to spend much more time with him after the whole incident with the war and had become even more protective and worried over him ever since they found out about his situation at school. Checking his messages there were a few texts from his parents.

Mom
How is everything going with WXS?
You sounded really happy when you were telling me and your dad about them

Dad
Are you having fun?

They would wake up if he sent them a text. Thanks to the fact that he had been working in ArcLand since he was fourteen, Asahi certainly had enough money to move out but hadn’t exactly gotten to it yet. He liked spending time with his parents and they wanted to spend much more time with him. That being said, his parents were aware of how late he would stay for work and he had his own keys to the house so they didn’t panic too much if he hadn’t come home by the time they went to bed. They would panic if he wasn’t there by the time they woke up though. He’d have to remember to send them a text by the next morning.

Emu had spare pyjamas for everyone and eventually they headed up to her room where she had set up a bunch of mattresses on the floor with very colorful blankets that had charmingly childish patterns printed on the fabric. The five of them had become visibly more sleepy after having eaten, changed and settled into the mattresses. Emu slept on her bed, Nene was the closest to her and parallel to her bed. Tsukasa’s mattress was at the foot of Emu’s bed and lined up against the wall. Asahi got a place next to the window, though by this point the pink curtains were drawn. Rui’s mattress was next to his.

Off went the lights once everyone said their goodnights to each other. The room became silent. Only the faint rustling of blankets could occasionally be heard anytime anyone shifted in their bed. Asahi closed his eyes. His eyelids grew heavy and so did the rest of his body. It felt like he was sinking into the mattress. His body and mind were completely relaxed. It was nice to be able to have moments like these. He didn’t have to be happy and he wasn’t plagued with sadness or fear. The matters of the world around him dissolved.

Right up until they came rushing back to him. His eyes shot open as he remembered a crucial but painful fact about himself. His nightmares.

Another ‘perk’ of having PTSD was nightmares. Safe to say that in performing a play that ticked almost every one of his triggers, he had gotten many more nightmares that month than he would have had on average. The thing he was worried about the most at the moment was his reaction to them.

Waking up in the middle of the night screaming was about the last thing he wanted to do. That was a nightmare in itself. Though he hadn’t done that since he was a small child. It was in the time after his parents had found and taken him back from the refugee camp and the first few months of living back in Japan again when he would wake up in such a violent manner from his nightmares. Even so he hesitated going back to sleep.

There was still the more likely possibility of him talking in his sleep. Going on crazed ramblings about how scared, lost and helpless he was. Pleading for his life. Hell, he might even start to straight up cry. When he had sleepovers with Sakurako she would wake him up almost every time because he was muttering in his sleep and she couldn’t get any rest because of it.

It would still be bad if they even saw him jolt up awake. They’d ask him if he was ok or if he had a nightmare. If he replied no then they’d ask why he looked so pale, what had caused to get up so suddenly or why he was breathing like he had just sprinted through a marathon. If he replied yes they’d ask if they were regular and the result would still end up with them concerned about him. They’d be closer to figuring out his secret.

Why did he keep it a secret from them?

He had been very open about it to other troupes on the condition that they tell no one else, and those troupes always ignored him or were even mean to him. Yet, WXS had been the nicest to him and he refused to tell them. What if the kindness stopped after they knew? His chest tightened at the thought. He felt like he had grown so close with them. An actual bond had formed. Tears started to form in his eyes. He blinked them back.

One thing’s for sure, they’d ask him why he seconded the suggestion of putting on a show that fit the exact criteria of everything needed to make him shatter mentally. That would only lead to him having to open up even more. Show how broken he actually is. He had to admit that he wasn’t as close to WXS as he’d like to think. He had no guarantee they’d be nice to him after that. Asahi wiped away the tears that formed in his eyes with his sleeve. He wasn’t going to sleep. He couldn’t. It’s not like he’d have trouble staying up all night.

He lay awake on the mattress, staring at the crack in the curtains. It was just wide enough for him to see through them. Unfortunately nothing but the white concrete balcony could be seen from his spot on the floor. Without any control, Asahi's eyes closed. They were so tired and heavy they closed on their own. Still unable to sleep, he lay there, worried he might wake anyone up otherwise. The tranquility of the room gave him no more comfort. There was no noise he could rely on to drown out his thoughts.

Whether minutes or hours had passed, he couldn’t tell. By that point he figured that everyone else should be fast asleep. Opening his eyes again, he could see a little more clearly in the dark. With great care not to make too much noise, Asahi got off of his mattress and crawled the short distance to the edge of the window on the far side of the room. Away from everyone else. Peering through the curtain, he still couldn’t see much from a sitting position. The tips of tree tops could barely be seen though the highest point of the faris wheel of PXL was visible. Lights decorated the metal wheel structure. The wheel spun around and the lights changed color. That was already enough to distract his mind. Once again fog clouded his head as all thoughts disappeared.

He rested his head against the window which only lulled him into a further state of dissociation with the rest of the world. Both mind and body were completely detached and both felt completely numb. An indefinite amount of time passed. A century could have passed and he might not have even noticed. The colorful dots on the faris wheel held his attention with the unrelenting grip a crab might have in its pincers.

“Asahi?” A soft voice broke the boy’s trance. It was only then he noticed how empty his eyes looked in the reflection of the glass. Turning around to see who had called out to him he saw Rui, sitting up on his mattress.

“I thought you were asleep. Did I wake you up?” A small voice in his head hissed at him, saying he hadn’t been careful enough.

“No, no. I was awake the entire time.” He whispered back. “I didn’t even notice that you moved until I turned around.”

“Oh thank god. You had me worried for a second.” Asahi put a hand to his chest as he let out a sigh of relief.

“Are you having trouble sleeping?” Rui asked abruptly. Asahi hesitated and looked back past the curtain. It was a good thing that the curtains prevented Rui from seeing his sullen expression in the reflection of the window.

“Maybe.” He chuckled. It was the only response he could come up with. The silence between his question and the reply was overbearing. “Are you having trouble sleeping?”

“No, not exactly. I’m a little more of a night owl. I don’t necessarily have trouble sleeping, I have trouble remembering to sleep,” Without warning Rui stood up and quietly walked over to Asahi’s side. “And I may or may not have been planning out various scripts and stageplays for shows in my head for the past,” He looked to the side of Asahi’s mattress and tapped on his phone screen to display the time.
00:24.

“Hour and a half.” He finished. Asahi suppressed a laugh, eyes still fixed on the view outside.

“That doesn’t surprise me if I’m going to be completely honest.” He glanced over at Rui. The small amount of moonlight that leaked in through the gaps in the curtain colored everything it touched in cool undertones. Rui was stunning in such lighting. His hair was muddled up. A few strands stuck out in all different directions. He’d never seen Rui like that before. A smile couldn’t help but form on his lips at the sight. He wished he could cuddle him or pet his hair but he figured it probably wasn’t the right time for that.

“Do you have trouble sleeping often?” Rui pressed further. Asahi only nodded. There was no point in lying about that. Rui had already been eyeing him with concern throughout the evening. The director hummed to himself before giving him a sympathetic look.

“Well I have a feeling I won’t be able to offer anything that will actually help you in any way. I’m sure if this is a problem you face often you’ve tried more ways of solving it then I can think of in this moment.” He turned around and pondered for a moment. “Is there anything you know will help that I could do?”

“Unless you have sleeping pills with you, then I don’t really know.” Asahi sighed. The plan was to not sleep so he wouldn’t risk anyone figuring out his secret but if Rui wanted him to rest then he should go along with it. Perhaps he would end up sleeping after all. Little sleep is still sleep. Rui stared at him for a couple of seconds longer before looking back at the others.

“Would it hurt you to go back to bed and try to sleep?” Rui motioned his head towards the mattresses. Not knowing what else to say, Asahi stood up and laid back down on his mattress. Surprisingly, Rui didn’t go to his bed but instead sat down next to him. For a moment he simply watched him. Then he took Asahi’s hand.

“Would it help if I stayed by your side or if I left you alone? You were out like a light when you fell asleep next to me but I really don’t know you well enough to know if it was because you were just that tired or if being near someone did help a little.” He rubbed his thumb over the back of Asahi’s hand. It felt nice. To have someone care for you, to have Rui hold his hand, it was a nice feeling.

“You don’t mind?” He checked if the director was really alright with doing that. Rui nodded in response. The director then laid down on his back at the very edge of the mattress. He continued to hold onto his hand. With the other, he picked up the blanket and covered the two of them in it, up to their shoulders. Asahi was lying on his side facing the other boy. He shuffled a small distance back to give Rui some more room on the mattress though he didn’t move any closer. Still happy about the outcome, he closed his eyes. A smile present on his face.

Unfortunately sleep did not come any easier. On a more positive note, he felt much more comfortable. More calm. Safer. Normally when he was having a bad night, Asahi would be restlessly tossing and turning in bed or would lay motionless uncomfortably for what seemed like an eternity. There was never any in between. This time though, he was perfectly snug where he was and had no intention of moving around at all. Not only that but with Rui’s presence being much more prevalent, a sense of safety washed over him as well. He could hear the boy’s breathing and matched it, their chests rising and falling with every inhale and exhale in synchronisation. A strange warmth began to emanate inside of him. It wasn’t strange because it was warm, it was strange because it felt different. It was familiar though he hadn’t been able to pinpoint why. The warmth was pleasant and soothing but there didn’t seem to be a specific cause of it. After some more thought, Asahi figured it wasn’t too important. No harm was being done so that mystery could be solved another day.

Not yet able to fall asleep, he continued to bask in this new cozy warmth and his mind always wandered back to his hand. Rui continued to hold onto it, albeit with an extremely loose grip. That didn’t matter though. What was important was that it was being held in the first place. With his mind preoccupied with happy thoughts, he was admittedly startled when Rui turned in what he assumed was his sleep. If at the very least Rui was still able to get some sleep, even if he was squeezed for space on a single mattress for Asahi’s sake, he would be happy.

Having already lost track of time since having returned to the mattress, Asahi zoned out yet again. He might have counted it as sleeping if it weren’t for the fact that he didn’t know how much time had passed and that he was somewhat certain that he was awake the entire time. The night seemed to drag on forever, though it didn’t bother him as much as the last two times. Every now and then he could hear the boy next to him shift positions. This unfortunately meant that he had taken his hand away from Asahi’s but he didn’t feel like making it a point to hold hands anymore. They were sharing a bed and a blanket already by this point. He was now certain Rui was asleep because a soft snoring sound was emitting from him. It was beyond adorable to hear.

Asahi opened his eyes for the first time after having cozied up next to the other boy. He hadn’t noticed that he had gotten closer to him. Before, Rui was on the other side of the mattress, almost teetering off the edge and his other side was touching the floor. Now he was on the mattress entirely, around center-left. The blanket had also warped its shape. Their chest was now exposed to the air of the room as the blanket sat below waist level.

More time passed. Again, unsure of exactly how much time was passing Asahi laid peacefully until he was interrupted by a sudden touch. Without any warning an arm wrapped around his waist. He froze in fear. Completely caught off guard, he opened his eyes wide to see who exactly it was. It was Rui. Feeling a little dim-witted for not realizing who exactly had managed to get so close to him he relaxed again and let out a sigh of relief.

Then he realized just what exactly the situation was. Rui, who was asleep, had managed to get a hold of him and now he was stuck in his embrace. It both pleased and distressed him. The warmth that had stayed constant had turned into an uncomfortable heat as he started to better grasp just how close they were and how they might have looked to an outsider. If Emu, Nene or Tsukasa woke up then and there Asahi was sure he would die of embarrassment right on the spot. He should probably try and get out of this predicament.

Cautiously, an attempt to lift Rui’s arm off of him was made. So far he only had a single arm draped around his waist area so it shouldn’t be too hard of a manoeuvre to accomplish. Despite this, Rui seemed to realize his arm was being moved and began to stir. Asahi nearly dropped his arm but hastily placed it back down instead. However, Rui’s grip on the boy only tightened. Now his face was almost touching the area around Rui’s collarbone. There was still only one arm holding Asahi but with the restricted space between them, it would be much harder to reach over and lift his arm off of him. To at least make an attempt, he gently lifted Rui’s arm but it wouldn’t budge. He couldn’t use enough of his strength to move it in this position and with how exhausted he was from the lack of sleep.

Asahi resolved to be stuck like this.

How had a situation like this even occurred? He could feel his face grow redder and redder with every passing second. He had to be dreaming. At some point when he was staring out at the faris wheel he surely must have fallen asleep. It made sense. Lots of people fall asleep when they’re in trances right? It sure felt like being hypnotised watching the slow moving lights rise up and then fall out of view from the spot in the balcony that blocked his view of the rest of the ride.

He wasn’t even able to see Rui’s face. To properly gauge if he was asleep or not. He was stuck staring at his damn neck like some kind of vampire. The weight of the other boy on him only served as a reminder of how close they were. No one he knew ever cuddles with someone like this unless they’re dating. He hasn’t even done something like this with his troupe mates or Sakurako.

After accepting his fate, the heat became more bearable, it shifted back to its original pleasant warmth. In return, Asahi placed an arm over Rui’s waist. He might as well lean into the touch if the director was going to be so persistent, even in his sleep. It already felt great to have his hand held while they slept but to be cuddled to this level felt amazing. Being cold was a completely foreign concept. He comfortably nuzzled his face into the crook of Rui’s neck. That was the position he chose to keep. Maybe he’d fall asleep after an hour. All he could focus on was the sound of Rui’s breathing and the arm he kept around him. The steady pattern of his breath was the last thing Asahi heard before peacefully drifting off to sleep.

Not surprisingly, Asahi woke up early. His eyes opened to a still sleeping Rui. With a little more light, he could see his face better. He looked so cute when he was resting so soundly. His hair was even more tangled and messy than it was during the night. The curtains still kept most of the light from entering the room but he could see the little light that came in was orange in color.

Rui still had an arm around him and he still had his face tucked away near the crook of his neck but a few things were different to how he remembered. One, was that he was far enough from him that he could actually see his face now. The most obvious was that the blanket had been almost completely kicked off. There was only a small sliver of it over his leg. Rui’s leg was also on top of his. The angle he was at, he was close to being on top of Asahi. They were almost intertwined. In one swift but careful motion, the brunette freed one of his legs and kicked the blanket over him so he could barely reach it. He then slipped his arm off of the director and picked up the blanket, covering the two of them once more. It was nicer to have the soft cloth over them. The warmth felt different again. Asahi could remember this sort of morning warmth. The one you never want to leave but you have to wake up to go to work or school eventually. Even if you stay in bed, it fades after a while. That or the warmth turns into an overbearing heat if it’s summertime.

In that sense he wouldn’t mind if he couldn’t go back to sleep. He finally had confirmation that time was moving. He’d have as much time to enjoy the comfort until Rui woke up. Maybe if he woke up early too they could enjoy the moment together. Even so, he closed his eyes. They ached too much, they felt too heavy. As beautiful as Rui was, he might as well get some rest. A way to pass the time was needed and so was any more minutes of sleep he could get. His arm found its way back around the side of the boy. His hand clung onto his back, making sure they were close together as if something would separate them. Now that he thought about it, Rui’s grip was more slack now then it was when he was trying to sleep. Nevertheless he felt safe in his embrace.

His mind wandered again. Would he ever be able to do this again? He had a feeling that if he asked Rui he might accept but at the same time doubts creeped in. He had been asleep the entire time as far as he knew. What if it only discouraged him from being close with him? Without realizing it, the hand he had on the director's back gripped the fabric of his borrowed pyjamas. He squinted his eyes when he kept on board the train of thought. It was broken when he heard the muffled sounds of bedsheets being moved around. Perhaps someone had woken up, or maybe they just moved in their sleep a lot.

Then he heard the click of a phone camera.

“Who was that?” Asahi whispered.

“Eep!” Curiously, the reaction that came as soon as he had opened his mouth was not enough for Asahi to tell who it was that had woken up. It wasn’t Emu. The voice would have been much higher pitched. The voice was too high pitched to be Tsukasa’s normal speaking voice but knowing him, he wouldn’t be all that shocked if it was him that made such a squeaky noise.

“I’m so sorry, I’ll delete the photo! I just wanted to rub it into Rui’s face when he woke up.” It was Nene. She sounded all too hurt from being caught. In all honesty he could imagine Sakurako doing the exact same thing she was doing, albeit with much more confidence.

“If it’s for messing with Rui then it’s fine by me.” He laughed quietly. “Just don’t go showing it around to everyone, ok?”

“Of course. That wasn’t what I was planning to do at all.” She sounded relieved and much less panic stricken.

“You know, I have a friend that I’ve known since I was little who, I am almost a hundred percent sure, would be doing exactly what you’re doing. Though to rub it in my face instead.” He reminisced.

“Really? Maybe we should meet then.” Nene sounded like she had returned back to a normal, although more tired voice than usual but he'd be surprised if she didn’t sound at least a little groggy. He could hear a quiet chuckle coming from her.

“You probably will. Maybe you even have. She’s also an actor and singer and works at Phoenix Wonderland.” He’d never heard them mention Sakurako so he could only assume that they had either never met her, or had only seen each other in passing.

“Hm, remind me to ask about her later.” Asahi heard another rustling sound. Nene had either gotten out of bed or back into it. For a few seconds there was silence.

“It’s kind of awkward being awake before the person who actually lives in the house is awake.” Nene mumbled. Asahi could only assume it was to herself but the room was so quiet that any sound cut through the silence like a knife.

“Yeah. Actually what’s the time? I’ve been completely lost the entire night.” It’d be best to try and regain at least some sense of time.

“Really? With Rui the night owl by your side, I would have thought he could have told you the time every five minutes knowing how late he stays up.” Her tone was teasing. If Asahi could eyeroll with his eyes closed, then he would.

“It’s like, six in the morning.” Nene informed him.

“Oh wow. You’re an early riser then.” He didn’t really expect any of them to like getting up so early in the morning but it seems like that was a misjudgement.

“So are you.” She called out.

“Fair point.” He could hear something being put down on the floor and the moving of the blankets where Nene was.

“I don’t normally wake up this early though. I’m just going to lay in bed until Emu or Tsukasa wakes up.” She said through a yawn. There was one more swooping sound of fabric and then there was quiet from Nene’s side.

“Alright then, good night. Or morning, I guess.” He said in a tired tone.

“Sleep well.” After that, Nene spoke no more. He made it a point to not make any sound either. So like he has been doing for almost the entire night, which by this point felt like a whole week had gone by, he laid in complete stillness and silence.

Asahi could go for hours daydreaming about different plays, scripts, shows, drawings, picture books or literally anything he liked without any problem but his patience was wearing thinner than normal. He continued to daydream about everything and anything that came to mind but he was coming to a point where he’d much rather share these ideas with everyone. More specifically Rui or Tsukasa but both were asleep. He supposed he could have taken the chance to talk to Nene but she wasn’t much of a talker, at least not to him, but more importantly it was a little hard to talk to anyone seriously when you’re being cuddled by your new friend who you don’t know how to feel about anymore. Especially when your face is on their shoulder for crying out loud!

The expression of “watching paint try” felt like a good comparison to make when he was waiting for someone to wake up. He could call himself an artist. He drew a lot in his free time and it became a hobby of his way back during elementary school. It was a way to express his feelings or even draw them out if he was having a rough time. Safe to say that in his time at school he drew almost constantly. It annoyed some of the teachers but his artistic skills only grew, now he could make picture books with quality that made them seem professional. At the moment he was already thinking of different scenes and plots to draw out into storyboards or a full on picture book. Still being unable to do much of anything, those thoughts simply stayed thoughts.

To get a better grasp on how much time had passed Asahi opened his eyes and looked around the room. It was brighter. Asahi wasn’t watching paint dry, he was watching the sun rise. He didn’t know which took longer. The days were getting longer in the coming seasons so it could only mean that the time the sun took to rise and set was increasing too.

Closing his eyes once more he tried yet again to find solace in sleep. It only evaded him once more. It was becoming infuriating. The urge to move, stand up, stretch, to do anything was turning into a prickling sensation that spread throughout his entire body. He did nothing but lay idly, nothing but the sounds of breathing and the occasional shuffling sound of fabric coming from where the other three were sleeping. It mostly came from Nene's place.

Finally someone else seemed to wake up. The unmistakable sound of an actual bed mattress squeaking gave away Emu’s awakeness. If not that, then it was the great yawn she let out. Asahi could only assume she was stretching.

“Morning Emu.” Despite having been awake for less time, Nene was the first one to speak to the pink girl.

“Good morning Nene!” Her voice was more muted than normal. He chalked it down to the effect of having woken up seconds ago. “Is everyone else aslee-” She stopped talking. There were a few seconds of silence.

“Yeah they’re doing their own thing.” Nene’s tone made it sound as if she was clarifying something. “And Asahi’s also awake. Or at least he was when I woke up.”

“Still awake.” He let out a muffled groan.

“Morning Asahi.” Emu was giggling while she talked to him.

“Morning.” He gave a short, tired response. He didn’t know how long he had slept for but clearly it wasn’t enough.

“Someone seems a little grouchy.” Nene teased. “Is the sleep deprivation catching up to you?”

“What’s the time?” He could hear the sound of someone picking up a phone from the floor.

“A little over six thirty.” She replied.

“It’s only been thirty minutes?” He complained. “I thought it had been at least an hour or two.”

“Did you not sleep well?” Emu spoke. She sounded concerned.

“Did I sleep comfortably? Yes. Did I sleep well? No.” He had to admit that having Rui by his side made things better but they didn’t magically increase the hours of which he slept. They did increase the hours where he was resting. Not asleep but not tossing and turning restlessly or overthinking things like he normally would have.

“Aww, that’s not good.” She sounded even more deflated. He felt a little guilty for making her feel bad.

“I would offer to wake him up for you but it’s six thirty in the morning. I know that Rui at the very least would not be happy to be woken up at a time like that.” Nene added.

“Especially when we went to bed so late.” Emu spoke again. Still dreary.

“Well that’s normal for Rui.” Nene cleared. Asahi had heard that from Rui himself.

“Should we go downstairs to the kitchen?” Asahi couldn’t figure out whether Emu was talking to the two of them or just Nene. One option was much more likely than the other.

“Sure.” Nene gave a short response and before he could figure out what to say, they were both gone.

He was stuck. Again.

The heaviness in his eyelids was lifted and he opened them again. There was Rui. out of the corner of his eye he spotted the Tsukasa. In the corner, still sleeping. Asahi had taken him for the kind of person to snore but he remained quiet which was something he wasn’t normally.

He could try and escape again. Rui’s grip has lessened but then came the issue of how to get him off of him. If he slowly pushed him off then he might be able to get away without waking him up. Would the blanket pose a problem in this plan? Asahi still made no moves to escape. He wanted to be able to move freely again but not a single muscle in his body moved to try and gain that freedom back. Getting up is the only logical thing to do. He had been awake for god knows how long and didn't seem to be able to go back to sleep but still, he stayed put.

Time passed. He had no idea how much but he knew it had to be passing. He could hear voices downstairs. From Emu, from Nene, and a few people he didn’t recognize immediately but he could make the ties and figured those were the pink girl’s brothers and sister.

An abrupt motion came from the corner of the room. A few seconds later came a great yawn. Rui was going to be the last one out of all of them to wake up. It made sense because of how late he went to bed.

“Hm?” A puzzled hum came from the place where the future star was sleeping. There was more rustling and then footsteps that grew louder and louder. They stopped a meter or so before the mattress he and Rui were in.

“Leave it up to Rui to get into the weirdest situations possible.” Tsukasa said with a sarcastic tone. Asahi found himself holding back laughter. Tsukasa didn’t seem to hear or if he did, he didn’t seem to care because he could hear footsteps leading away to the downstairs area. By the time he had managed to compose himself, Tsukasa had already left and he’d realized he’d forgotten to ask what time it was.

He still didn’t know if he wanted to wake Rui up. The need to wait any longer however, came to an end. The arm around Asahi gained life and gently squeezed him for a second. He opened his eyes for a moment to free the hand that he had around Rui. He nudged him to see if he was waking up, and if not he hopefully would. A quiet groan escaped him and without further notice, he sat up. Asahi felt so much lighter than he could remember being now that there wasn’t someone sleeping on him.

“When did I…” The director muttered indistinctly.

There was a short pause before a hand cupped Asahi’s cheek. With his eyes shut, he could only assume Rui thought he was asleep. Suddenly now that Rui was awake, he found himself frozen in place. He hoped the heat that swelled up in his face wasn’t something visible to the other boy.

The hand moved further back, running through his hair. His heartbeat rang out in his ears. With how loud it was to him, he was surprised Rui hadn’t realized that he was awake. What was he supposed to do now? If he announced that he was in fact conscious it would surely lead to one of the most awkward situations he had ever felt in his life but at the very same time did he want him to stop?

No, it felt too nice. The hand moved again, back to his cheek but this time his fingers curled under his jaw. Rui mumbled something, it was too quiet to hear. What he could pick up was his tone. His tone was warm. Perhaps fond. A thumb gently stoked the bottom of his lip.

Not only was he unable to move but Asahi found himself involuntarily tensing from the action. What was Rui doing? What did he want to do? Whatever it was, there was no way it could be platonic. Asahi was not a person who had ever dabbled in romance before unless watching and reading romantic plays and novels for theater purposes counted. He had never understood romance for his entire life up. In every single one of those stories, if a character did precisely what Rui was doing, it was always under the pretense of the character wanting to kiss whoever they were doing that to.

The idea of kissing Rui sent a wave of heat down Asahi’s body. The mental image flashed through his mind. Being pressed even closer to him. A hand running through his hair; holding onto the back of his head to make sure their lips stayed together until they ran out of breath.

“You know I’m awake right?” Asahi blurted out. In an instant Rui had retracted his hand. The mattress shook underneath him as if the boy had jumped like a spooked kitten.

“Sorry, I did not in fact know you were awake.” His usual teasing voice had an undertone of surprise in it. The laughter that came from him tried to cover that. Now looking at Rui awake for the first time that day, his face was tinted with pink around his cheeks and even his ears. For the first time ever he had seen Rui, the person who play-flirted with WxS and even Asahi almost all the time, was flustered.

“How long have you been awake for?” He narrowed his eyes.

“Since 6 a.m. at the least. Couldn’t check the time since someone wanted cuddles.” Asahi’s smile resembled an awful lot like Rui’s typical smirk. A pillow was promptly smacked across his face.

“Have some pity for me! I was asleep. Can’t I sleep in peace without worrying about being judged?” Rui complained in an over dramatic fashion, turning his head away in mock betrayal. He quickly checked his phone to check the time. Five minutes past eight in the morning. A smile grew on his face.

“If you did wake up at six then that would mean you have spent the past two hours here with me without having gotten up. The entirety of which, you were awake.” Rui leaned in closer to Asahi, their faces only inches apart.

“Wha- I didn’t want to wake you up!” Asahi attempted to defend himself all too quickly. The inventor had already begun to chuckle. It sounded so sweet. Maybe a kiss wouldn’t be a bad idea. He only had to lean in a little closer.

“Everyone’s already awake and are probably waiting for us, so how about we go downstairs already?” Asahi quickly changed the subject and for once got out of bed. The instant he took the covers off of him a wave of cool air hit him. Even if five people had been sleeping in that room, the heat inside the blankets and the temperature of the room were vastly different. Leaving the warmth of the bed so soon and so suddenly began to feel more like a mistake.

Rui followed the boy downstairs without a word. In the kitchen Emu, Tsukasa and Nene had already eaten breakfast though they had kept the food out so the two of them could get something to eat. Upon seeing Rui, Nene made it a point to show just how clingy he had been towards the ArcLand member. In seconds she pulled up the photo she had taken on her phone and showed it to Rui. In even less time he had decided that trying to defend himself was pointless.

“Shut up.” Was the only response the director could manage. Asahi knew that feeling well.