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She was thankful for his idea to walk the battlements, still not entirely sure what it was that she wanted to say to him. It probably shouldn't be so difficult to tell someone you like them, Greta contemplated, but it wasn't as though she knew he felt the same. She hoped he did, that she wasn't just reading too much into things, that she wasn't about to make an absolute fool of herself. But what did she know, really? Certainly nothing about romance or courting.
"It's a nice day." Cullen remarked, pulling her back from her spiralling thoughts. It occurred to her they'd crossed Skyhold now, walking the whole way in an awkward silence, one he was clearly trying to break. His voice was friendly enough, if a little hesitant, but she noted he'd raised a hand to rub the back of his neck, something he only ever seemed to do when he was stressed.
She opened her mouth to reply, but all that came out was: "What?"
"It's...." He started to repeat, before changing his mind. The friendly tone of voice disappeared now, becoming more formal, professional even. He revised his words, letting his hand fall back to his side with an inaudible sigh. "There was something you wished to discuss?"
"Certainly not the weather." Greta murmured, more to herself than as an actual response. She was already making a mess of this whole thing and she'd barely even said anything. Taking a deep breath, she found herself closing her eyes tightly, as though bracing for pain, and blurted out: "Cullen, I care for you, and, uh..."
The brief flash of surprise in his eyes caught her off guard, when she finally dared look at him, and she trailed off with a frustrated sigh. He stopped moving along the battlements, instead turning to face her, his expression difficult to read. She tried and failed to find the words to continue again, prompting him instead to ask, in a gentle voice; "What's wrong?"
"I just..." Greta started. She was afraid to voice her concerns, afraid that he would confirm them, but staring up into his eyes, she found her voice admitting; "I know you left the Order, but you were a Templar. And I'm a mage. I can't expect you to think of me as anything more than that."
Cheeks flushing with embarrassment over the whole situation, she readied herself to apologise for wasting his time, to ask him to please, Maker, never speak of this again.
"I could." He remarked, stopping her stream of thought dead in its tracks. She stared at him, dumbly, as he corrected: "I mean, I do. Think of you. And of... what I might say in this sort of situation."
She wanted to grin. Did he actually just say that? She'd been agonising over this, over her feelings for him, had devoted time that almost certainly should have been spent on other, more world-saving matters to trying to figure out if he felt the same about her. She had convinced herself he was going to reject her if she ever told him any of this. But the whole time, he'd been thinking about her too?
They became silent once more, Cullen clearly as unsure of how to voice his own thoughts as she was. Taking another few steps along the battlements, he turned to look over the parapet at the mountains surrounding Skyhold, leaning slightly against the stone walls of the fortress. She didn't take in their surroundings, instead looking at him, studying his face intently. Out in the bright sunlight he looked tired, hard lines clear on his face. She knew he'd been beating himself up over what had happened at Haven, and she wondered when was the last time he'd allowed himself any kind of rest.
"What's stopping you?" She asked, carefully, after a lengthy period of quiet.
He turned from the view, slowly, meeting her gaze. His response rolled smoothly from his lips, well practised, and she wondered if he'd reflected on this question before. "You're the Inquisitor. We're at war, and you...." He let out a sigh, cutting himself short. "And I didn't think it was possible."
"And yet I'm still here." She was still staring intently at him, finding herself a little lost in his amber eyes. He smiled at her words, and she felt him inch himself closer.
"So you are." He agreed. He'd moved, she realised, putting her between him and the parapet, and was already close enough that she'd had to tilt her head to maintain her gaze into his eyes. He continued, still, to move ever so closer as he spoke. "It seems too much to ask."
His expression was one of desire, eyes fixed on her face. She could feel the warmth of his body, he was so close. He leaned in towards her with each word, and she found herself completely captivated, everything else in the world fading away. "But I want to..."
Her lips parted in anticipation. She could feel his breath on her face. His hands rested gently on her waist, and she wanted nothing more than to melt into his embrace. He was mere millimetres from her, moving in for a kiss that she'd been wanting from him for weeks. She could almost taste...
"Commander!" Someone's voice snapped them both out of their spell. Cullen blinked in confusion, and she felt her cheeks turning bright red, suddenly too embarrassed to meet his eye. Someone stood a few feet away, she realised now, as the world blinked back into view, holding some kind of papers in hand. "You wanted a copy of Sister Leliana's report."
Cullen broke away from her, a deep frustration apparent on his face. He spun to face the poor recruit, who's name Greta felt sure she'd learnt at some point. Was it... James? John? Cullen snapped angrily: "What?!"
The young man- Joshua, perhaps?- held up the papers, still oblivious to the situation he'd interrupted, and trying to helpfully remind Cullen of the task he'd been sent on. "Sister Leliana's report. You wanted it... 'without delay'?"
He trailed off, finally meeting the Commander's face and seeing the glare directed at him. He took half a step backwards in surprise, and looked past Cullen, moving his attention to where the commander had been standing. Where she was still standing, pressed up against the battlements, face flushed with embarrassment, wishing the ground would just open up and swallow her. She tried not to meet the recruit's eye. Maybe it was Joseph, she wondered fleetingly. Jeffrey? Whatever his name, he looked from her to Cullen, and back again. She wondered how likely it was that Corypheus would launch another attack on them. Now would be good. She'd certainly prefer fighting his dragon again over this torment.
"...or... or to your office." Jim stammered, Cullen's glare still fixed on him, unrelenting. If looks could kill, Greta mused, he'd probably have died a hundred times over by now. He seemed to be fighting the urge to literally turn and run from the situation. "Uh...right."
Greta watched him leave, taking a few steps backward, afraid to break eye contact with his Commander, before finally turning and heading back through a door into the building adjoining the battlements. She quickly wondered how she might also leave, preferably without everything being incredibly awkward between herself and her advisor. She began speaking before Cullen had even turned back to face her, needing to excuse herself to avoid the mortifying conversation she knew was about to follow, the discussion of how they'd gotten lost in the moment, and how this was all a terrible idea.
"If you need to-" She started.
His lips were on hers before she realised, his right hand grabbing her waist and pulling her the couple of steps to him, as his left reached up to cradle her head. She let out a surprised gasp, arms flailing as he moved her. His tongue found hers, insistent and explorative, and she wrapped her arms around him, moaning appreciatively. Her fingers ran through his hair, and her body relaxed, everything else leading up to this moment completely forgotten. She wasn't sure exactly how long that moment lasted, but to Greta it seemed to be both forever and yet not nearly long enough. Cullen broke the kiss slowly, pulling back and brushing stray strands of hair from her face. There was a concerned expression on his face, and he looked awkwardly at the ground.
"I'm sorry. That was, um... really nice." He breathed. His voice was soft, unlike she'd ever heard it before, and it made her think he just might have enjoyed their kiss as much as she had. He looked up at her at last, eyes seeking her reaction, and a slight smile forming on his lips when he found it.
She grinned, then feigned an expression of innocence. "I... believe that was a kiss." She wanted to pull his hands back onto her body, to feel his touch again, to taste his kiss, but didn't quite dare make so bold a move. Instead she continued to tease, enjoying his smile, and wishing he did it more often. "But I can't be sure. It's all a blur."
His chuckle became a laugh, and she bridged the gap between them this time, pushing up onto her tiptoes to reclaim his lips. His arms wrapped around her once more, and in that moment, she relaxed for the first time in months.