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It was a decidedly colorless room, that she woke up in. That was the first thing she noticed. The second was the needle stuck in her arm.
“Ah, careful,” a voice interjected, when she reached to pull out the needle. She looked up. The voice came from a woman sitting on a swivel chair nearby, carefully monitoring what looked like a very complicated setup of documents and measurements on a computer. Her jacket had a nametag, but from this angle, all that could be seen on it was “A.”
All of this, even the woman herself, seemed so colorless, so bland.
“Where...am I?”
“The hospital,” Ms. A replied. She typed something on the computer. “I know you’ve only just woken up, but could you tell me…what is your name?”
Her name? Yes, her name was… was…
“Pomni.”
It didn't feel quite right, but it was all that came to mind.
Ms. A paused a moment, as if waiting to hear more. But when no further response came, she slowly typed Pomni on her keyboard.
“Alright then, Miss…Pomni. Do you remember anything about how you got here?”
Here. To the hospital. She thought that she would remember something so important. She never visited hospitals. Or did she? Why did she think that? The third thing she was now noticing was that her head felt oddly light. Like there was supposed to be more substance to it than there was currently.
Perhaps her confusion was a bit too visible on her face, because Ms. A’s brow furrowed a little and she typed something else on her computer before turning back and saying with a gentle sigh, “Let’s move on from that question for now. I’ll just inform you of your condition. All of your vitals are stable, and your blood work came up clean, but brain scans show a surprising amount of unusual activity. Amnesia is a distinct possibility. We’ll probably be keeping you here for …”
The words started to fade out. Pomni looked around the room, her head spinning. The lack of color was oddly disorienting. And that in itself was odd. She didn’t remember being bothered by colors before.
“...rest up, and I’ll come back soon with the doctor,” Ms. A finished saying. She waited for Pomni to acknowledge, but when she was met only with a blank stare, she got up and left the room, the door shutting softly behind her.
Pomni lied back on the hospital bed. She was certain she was not supposed to be here. It was too colorless, too quiet. But she hated loud noises, didn’t she? How odd. She could have sworn…
Her vision blurred again. She drifted off to sleep.
~~
“Pomni!”
It was dark, complete blackness. The air felt hollow. Pomni turned around wildly to see where the voice had come from. She knew that voice.
“Kinger?”
“Pomni.”
“I can’t see you, Kinger…” she started to take a step forward, but hesitated, unsure whether the darkness was safe to move around in.
“Pomni.”
She whipped around. Kinger was right behind her.
“Kinger, I-”
She started to cry. Why was she crying? She took a step towards Kinger, but he moved back, like a radius was extended from Pomni and he had to keep to that distance.
“Pomni,” in the gentlest tone he had ever spoken in, “Pomni. Keep her safe for me, won’t you?”
Pomni sniffed to keep in the tears. “Keep- Keep who safe, Kinger? What’s going on? Why can’t I…” She took another step, and he moved back accordingly.
“Keep her safe, Pomni.”
“Kinger-”
He vanished into the darkness, like he had never been there to begin with.
~~
She woke up crying. It was dark now, too, but not the all-encompassing blackness that had surrounded her before. Through the cracks of the blinds over the window, there were hints of moonlight streaming into the hospital room. The needles in her arms were gone, patched over with bandages. She must have been asleep for some time.
Notably, she was not alone. In the darkness, she could hear someone humming, faintly. A woman’s voice. She couldn’t place the tune, but it was reminiscent of an old video game. One she was certain she had never played, but felt nostalgic nonetheless.
“What song is that?” she called hesitantly across the room, where she could make out another hospital bed in the darkness. Had there always been another patient in this room? She had been so disoriented earlier that she hadn’t paid any attention.
The woman across the room stopped humming. Her eyes glinted in the dark as she turned towards Pomni.
“Oh, hello,” she said gently. “You’re finally awake again. The doctor did a real number on you, huh?”
“I…guess so?” Pomni answered hesitantly. “...What was that song? It sounded so familiar.”
The woman shrugged. “Don’t know. It’s been in my head for a long, long time. Can’t seem to shake it. None of the doctors here can tell me what it’s from. A real shame. None of them seem to have any particular interest in entomology, either, which is an even greater shame. I’m an entomologist, you see.”
Pomni stared for a moment. Maybe striking up a conversation with this woman was the wrong idea. She seemed to be a little crazy. Then again, Pomni was feeling a little out of sorts at the moment as well.
She took a deep breath and hopped out of her hospital bed, stepping carefully across the floor so that she wouldn’t knock anything over or alert anyone that she was awake. She wasn’t particularly hoping to run into any nurses or doctors right now.
“I’m Pomni,” she said, when she reached the woman’s hospital bed. She held out her hand. “What’s your name?”
The woman’s gaze slid over to Pomni; she had the most beautiful brown eyes Pomni had ever seen. They were dazzling. And her stare felt oddly comforting, in a way.
“The doctors told me they found my records, that I have a name. But it doesn’t feel right to me. Nothing’s felt right since…” she trailed off, her eyes unfocusing slightly. But only for a moment. “If it’s alright with you, would you call me Queenie? It’s my favorite name, but no one here will call me that.”
Pomni nodded. Queenie. Where did she know that from?
Queenie cocked her head. “Pomni. Oh dear, you’re crying…”
So she was. But why? Pomni reached a hand up to her face and wiped the tears, but they kept flowing anyway.
“Queenie,” her voice was hardly a whisper. “I just want to go back…”
There was a pause, and then Queenie reached out, wrapping her arms around Pomni and pulling her close into a hug. Her hold was soft, warm, it felt motherly, in a way.
“I’ve been trying to figure out how to get them out for the longest time,” Queenie spoke quietly, “but I haven’t had any luck. You’re the first I’ve really talked to since I got out. There were…” she paused, a slight shake in her voice. “There were others, but they were discharged already. They didn’t want anything to do with that place. But…he’s still in there, I know he is…”
Pomni tried to suppress a sob, but only half succeeded. Earlier she had been so confused about what she was doing here, in the hospital, but now, in Queenie’s embrace and surrounded by darkness, the memories were coming back to her. The circus, Kinger, Gangle and Zooble, Ragatha and Jax. The adventures. The pain. The hope, and the hopelessness. Had she really abstracted? Was that really the end of all of it? Was there really no way to return? Did she even want to return?
“But it’ll be ok,” Queenie broke the momentary silence. Her hand gently brushed over Pomni’s hair. “You’re here now, and I’ll do my best to help you. And perhaps, we’ll get them out of there, too.”
Her touch was gentle. Pomni relaxed a little, her cries quieting. Maybe it would all be ok. Maybe there was a way back, or a way to get the others out.
Maybe she would wake up and this would all be a dream.
The digital circus is a strange place, after all.