Work Text:
Flashes of incomprehensible colours burst through her eyelids demanding to be witnessed, closed as those eyes are- turned away for just a moment as blinding light takes another friend's life.
Am I doing the right thing? Is it worth it to throw my own friends at that... thing just to be consumed?
It never stops, moving forward towards the sun that lies behind her- far away yet ever too close.
Are they truly gone completely? She said that O....--That monster hijacked the connection but is it doing more? Have I... ruined them? If I fail will they never again be?
It died.
It came back.
The words came out of my mouth not of my own accord, it felt like the spider that she was staring at put the words into her mouth demanding to be said. Demanding her to proclaim that she was lesser than it, that everything humans have ever done, ever made, ever accomplished was meaningless in the face of that One Radiant Thing. It was a monster, and it was unbeatable. We lost.
Kukulkan and with her the Malla came, and saved the day but I swear still it looks at me.
Alive and well, and ready to devour me whole.
And so the day starts off with a nightmare for the Master of Chaldea, on the way to Antarctica to find out what the deal is with Chaldeas. What Daybit said...
I don't know. I don't know. It's been a day, and ORT is still there. In my mind, my heart, my soul, I- I don't know. It's like ORT is still there in the back of my mind but its gone ORT is
Still
Alive?
Wait
No
The memories, ORT exists in Proper Human History, rather it exists even now. She said that. Is ORT bleached? Is ORT still in the Crystal Valley? Or is it bleached away? I can't... Its still here on Earth? Its here? It sherehereits he ehreh its here Its not dead iits not deat ITS DNOT DEAD ITS ALIVE ITS SLIVE ITS HEREITS ON EARTH TYEREISNOTESCAPE.
The door knocks. Once, she doesn't hear it. Twice she doesn't hear it. Thrice. She doesn't hear it.
"Senpai?" Mash stands there, looking concerned. I must've worried her not opening the door instantly, I'm usually better at this."Hey Mash!" I say with a smile. Smiling in spite of everything is a virtue right?
"We're planning a party with everyone later, Director Goredolf thought it was a good idea, especially because we have no idea what we'll find in Antarctica. He thinks we all deserve a break- and cake especially is what he said!" She looks... happy, maybe. Thinking of a reply would be too much effort so the words erupted out of my smiling mouth instantly.
"Sounds like a great idea. I'll be there." Mash looked bright and left. I am left alone in my room.
I drop down onto the bed.
And I think if smiles like that can still be had then everything must've been worth it right? Even after everything, a world where the spider still exists could still be a world I could live in right?
Right?
I scream into my pillow, so nobody can hear me break.