Chapter Text
He was aware of the way other students were talking about him.
He was the scary, moody guy who should only ever be approached with caution. He wasn’t exactly someone to mince his words and hide his true thoughts – and those tended to be rather unkind and negative most of the time.
But was it really his fault that everyone around him was annoying, dumb and as interesting as watching paint dry?
At the beginning of his first year of high school, many girls showed interest in him because of his looks and excellent grades. But they soon started to avoid him like the plague once they got a taste of his personality.
Practically everyone soon started to keep away from him and not bother him unless it was an urgent matter, and he much preferred it that way.
Everyone but one girl.
There was this bakery that he frequented where they offered the softest bread and most aromatic coffee in the area.
Behind the counter, there was this awfully friendly and bubbly girl with bright, orange hair that always wore a big smile on her face.
Whenever he would come to get his usual order, she would try to strike up friendly conversation with him, and no amount of rudeness or dismissiveness was able to stop her.
Every time he entered the bakery, she would happily greet him with an excited “Ulquiorra-kun! The same as always?”.
He had insisted on her ceasing to call him that, and refer to him only via his last name, but to no avail.
At first, she irritated him, just like everyone else, but when she refused to give up on treating him kindly, no matter how nasty his attitude towards her, he started to grow interested in her.
What made her react so differently compared to other people?
Why was she so insistent on being friendly with him?
Why did she not simply give up and avoid speaking to him like everyone else?
He had to find answers. He had to know.
So it happened that he started to ask her questions.
“Girl”, he started, avoiding calling her by her name as usual. “Why aren’t you afraid of me?”
“Afraid?” She looked at him in astonishment. “Why would I be afraid of you?”
Now it was Ulquiorra’s turn to be puzzled.
“Everybody else usually is”, he answered bluntly.
So why not you? What makes you special?
“Hmm…”, she cocked her head to the side a bit and a frown was forming between her brows while she was in thought. “It is true that you don’t have the friendliest personality, but…” She grew silent for a few seconds before continuing.
“I have seen much, much scarier things.” Her expression grew solemn for a moment.
Ulquiorra had never seen her make a sad face before, and for some reason he couldn’t comprehend, he could feel something weird inside of him. Something that made him want to reach out, to make that downcast expression disappear somehow.
What was wrong with him?
Then, her smile returned, and she continued. “So a grumpy customer is really not something I can’t handle.”
He blinked in confusion at this sudden mood change.
Seems like she is a girl with strong spirit.
After that, he got his usual order and left.
He mulled over this interaction and what caused the weird reaction in his body for the rest of the day.
From then on, his visits to the bakery became even more frequent, and he started to engage in conversation with the orange-haired girl more.
He even toned down his unfriendly demeanour and had semi-friendly interactions with her.
He would regularly ask her questions in the name of his quest to understand her better.
She was really intriguing, that girl.
However, he never got to figure out what made her look so sad that one day, and never saw an expression like that on her face again.
Some part of him felt… relieved about that. Was it relief? He wasn’t sure as he used to just shut down and ignore his emotions until that point.
But now, he started to also be fascinated with the way certain things made him feel, and tried to understand himself better, as well as the girl.
“Hey, Ulquiorra.” His seat neighbour bumped his elbow to get his attention during a school break.
Ulquiorra let out a frustrated sigh.
Not this guy.
He hated that blue-haired guy with every fiber of his being. He was loud, obnoxious, impulsive and overly confident – so basically an amalgamation of every personality trait that Ulquiorra despised.
“What is it, Grimmjow?”, he answered with an annoyed tone in his voice.
The other started to grin, showing his sharp teeth.
“So, people have started whispering behind your back.”
“Yeah, as if that’s something new”, he scoffed.
“Yeah, but now, they are talking about how you seem so different all of a sudden. Almost somewhat cheerful.” He grinned. “Did something good happen to you lately, or what?”
Ulquiorra was puzzled.
He was the same as always, wasn’t he?
It’s not like he started to greet people, or changed anything about his habits that had been stagnant since… well, always.
“Nonsense”, he muttered as an answer.
“Huh?” It seemed like Grimmjow hadn’t heard him properly.
“I said it’s nonsense!” Ulquiorra almost yelled, which he had never done before. He usually was able to keep his calm.
Weird.
Why did this bother him so much?
When did he even start to feel bothered about things at all?
He decided that he needed some fresh air to calm his mind, and left the classroom.
The next day, he found a letter in his locker.
Curiously, he opened it. It was an invitation to meet in private to talk about something.
Ulquiorra recognized it as a love confession letter.
Strange. He hadn’t gotten one of those ever since his first week of high school. Before everyone had started to dub him the “Black-haired Ice Prince”.
He ripped it apart and threw it into the nearest trash bin before continuing on with his day as usual.
“Girl”, he started.
The orange-head let out a performative and playful sigh. “Will you ever call me by my name? I’ve told it to you several times. It’s Orihime.”
“Girl”, Ulquiorra insisted. Then, he continued on with a question. “Do I seem different to you?”
The orange-haired girl blinked at him in confusion.
“Different how?”, she asked.
“I don’t know”, he answered truthfully. “Just different somehow.”
“Hmm…” She started thinking, with that little frown appearing between her brows like it always did when the gears in her head started turning.
“You seem a bit less… How should I say it? Less like you hate everything and everyone. Almost… Almost content.”
His eyes widened in shock and disbelief.
How? Why?
When did this happen?
Noticing the look on his face, Orihime started talking again in a very fast pace, almost stumbling over her words. “But that’s nothing to worry about! It’s a good thing! I am happy for you!”
Then, she showed him the most beaming smile he had ever seen on her before. It was radiating, almost burning like the sun. “Really, I am.”
He could suddenly feel an intense, weird feeling in his chest.
It didn’t feel unpleasant, however.
It almost felt… warm.
Just then, he could hear the sound of the door being opened, and a new customer coming in.
“Yo, Orihime!”
The person entering was a tall guy with orange hair, similar to that of the girl behind the counter. He appeared friendly and familiar with her.
Ulquiorra instantly hated him.
“K-Kurosaki-kun!”
A slight blush was forming around the girl’s cheeks, and she started fidgeting nervously.
Ah.
I see what’s up.
While he had never experienced something like it before, Ulquiorra was not uneducated on the subject of romantic love on an intellectual level.
For some reason, he started to feel extremely uncomfortable, and felt an intense urge to leave the situation.
Without even ordering, he immediately turned away from the counter and left the bakery with big, fast steps, slamming the door behind him.
“Wait, Ulquiorra-kun!”
He could hear her call after him the moment he closed the door, but he didn’t turn his head to look back at her.
He just walked away in the direction of his home as fast as possible.
He just wanted to escape.
Escape this new feeling of throbbing pain in his chest.
This new emotion was one he hated, and never wanted to experience ever again.