Work Text:
Jack knocked quickly on the door of the conference room before opening it. "So, General where's the fire?"
He was vaguely aware of everyone else already being assembled, Teal'c and Carter as well as the general. Plus four other people he didn’t bother looking at straight away because getting dragged out of bed at five a.m. on a Saturday suggested a crisis and no doubt everything would be explained later.
"No fire, Colonel." Hammond was looking a little anxious about something all the same. "Is Doctor Jackson with you?"
"Yes, he's just – " Jack put his head outside the door and shouted, "Daniel, will you get a move on!" He pulled his head back in and gave Hammond an apologetic shrug. "He went to get coffee, sir. You know how he is."
"I tried Doctor Jackson's apartment several times but I kept getting his machine."
"He was staying with me, sir. Friday night is hockey night. Daniel comes over and…"
"And you watch the hockey game?"
"No, sir. What happens is Daniel talks all the way through the hockey game about the program on the other side he'd much rather be watching right now, or else he talks about the last mission, or the next mission and all the fascinating artifacts he either did find, didn't find, or is hoping to find. What we absolutely never get to do is watch the hockey game. However, I live in hope. There you are." As Daniel came into the room Jack gave him a look of exasperation.
Daniel held up the chipped mug apologetically. "Sorry, sir, but Jack was out of coffee." There was disbelief as well as accusation in Daniel's tone as he shot Jack a reproachful glance. "I can't believe you ran out of coffee."
"I had beer. On a boy's night in, one traditionally drinks beer."
"You knew I was coming over and you ran out of coffee?"
"Gentlemen…?"
Jack and Daniel both started guiltily as General Hammond's mild reproach reached them.
"Sorry, sir." Jack sat down in the first chair he came to and found himself with an empty chair between himself and Carter. Teal'c was sitting beyond her.
"Sorry," Daniel murmured and hastily sat down between Jack and Sam. He banged his elbow as he did so and slopped some coffee onto the table. "Sorry. Sorry."
Jack handed him a Kleenex in long-suffering silence then looked up to find he was staring straight at…himself.
"Jack…?" He heard Daniel say his name faintly beside him, so knew they must both be seeing the same thing. He made the huge effort necessary to wrench his gaze away from his own face to look down the far side of the table. Two Teal'cs. Two Carters. Two Daniels. Another Jack O'Neill. Same uniform, same hairstyles, or in his case, same amount of grey in the hair. Mirror images, every one.
Daniel said quietly, "Jack, what the hell was in the beer you gave me last night?"
"You're not hallucinating, people," Hammond said reassuringly. "This is SG-A from an Alternative Universe. And as you have probably already surmised this is Colonel Jack O'Neill, Doctor Daniel Jackson, Major Samantha Carter, and Teal'c."
"I'm on the Stargate program in your dimension?" Daniel brightened visibly. "In both of the last alternative dimensions we visited I wasn't. Actually, I was dead as well, but even when I'd been alive I hadn't been part of SG-1."
"And I'm in the Air Force." Sam was also smiling. "And I have the same rank. Isn't it incredible?"
Daniel peered down the table at the alternative Teal'c. "And you joined us against Apophis in your dimension? In the last two you were still on the other side." He turned to their Teal'c. "Isn't that great?"
Teal'c gave him a look that denoted no particular enthusiasm. "Indeed."
Jack frowned and looked back at his counterpart. "So everything's the same in your dimension? There's no difference between us at all? Wait." He darted a glance at the alternative Carter before looking back at his own counterpart. "So, if the Carter in your dimension is in the Air Force I'm presuming there's none of this silly being engaged/being married nonsense going on between you?"
"Thanks a bunch, sir," said Sam good-humoredly.
"Well, it was…disconcerting, you have to admit."
"Extremely," she admitted.
The alternative Daniel's jaw dropped. "Jack and…Sam? You're kidding me?"
Daniel nodded. "In both the alternative universes we've encountered so far Jack and Sam were..."
"Doin' it," Jack put in expressionlessly.
The alternative Carter pulled a face. "Sorry, sir, no offence but…yeuch!"
The alternative O'Neill grinned. "None taken, Carter, and right back at you."
Jack relaxed. "Well I'm very glad to hear I'm not sleeping with my team-members in every universe except this one."
"Oh…" The alternative Daniel shot a quick look at his commanding officer before glancing back across at his other self. "I thought…I mean…we assumed…"
Jack looked blank. "What?"
There was a hint of accusation in the alternative O'Neill's voice. "You came in together after all."
Daniel's brow creased in confusion. "Sorry, I'm not following you."
The two Carters were already looking at each other for enlightenment. So, after an initial hesitation, were the two Teal'c's. As realization hit Sam she gasped and looked to her counterpart for confirmation. The other woman gave her an apologetic shrug as she nodded.
"Holy Hannah!" Sam exclaimed.
Teal'c's raised eyebrow asked a question the alternative Teal'c's almost imperceptible nod of the head confirmed.
"What, Sam?" Daniel pleaded. "I don't understand."
General Hammond cleared his throat. "Um, Colonel O'Neill, Doctor Jackson, it appears in the alternative dimension from which these people have come, the two of you are…romantically involved."
Sam wondered if Daniel was ever going to close his mouth again. He looked as though someone had hit him round the head with a baseball bat, then marched him out onto the freeway stuck him in front of a line of oncoming traffic, turned everyone's headlights onto full beam and shone them straight in his face. The Colonel seemed to be coping slightly less well.
"You…what?"
"We…what?"
"What?"
"What?"
The alternative O'Neill appeared perplexed. "Is there a problem?"
Daniel made a huge effort to regain control of his jaw. "Um…no…it's just a bit of a surprise."
Jack nodded gravely. "Yes. Exactly. In the way a pink elephant landing on the bonnet of your car would be a bit of a surprise."
"Oh." The alternative Daniel looked chastened. "But when you said the other me was staying with you…"
"On the couch," Jack assured him. "Can't really stress enough here how Daniel always sleeps on the couch."
Sam looked across at her other self. "You see, our Colonel and Daniel just act like an old married couple."
"I resent that analogy, Major!"
Daniel swallowed. "Well it's an analogy I can live with. Name me one old married couple you know who are actually having sex, Jack."
"Good point." Jack nodded to Sam. "I withdraw my objection."
The alternative Daniel looked at the alternative O'Neill and the man gave him a good-natured shrug, clearly suggesting he should handle it. The alternative Daniel turned to his counterpart. "Is this…awkward for you?"
"No…" Daniel began automatically.
"Yes!" Jack put in emphatically.
Daniel tried to be tactful. "It's just – you know – Jack and I we don't really see each other…that way."
"Oh." The alternative Daniel frowned. "Why not?"
Jack and Daniel exchanged a glance and then looked away. Daniel shrugged helplessly. "We just…don't. I mean he's just…Jack."
"Yes." The alternative Daniel looked at the alternative O'Neill and his face lit up into a smile none of SG-1 had seen in way too long. He had to drop his gaze quickly, but the smile refused to be suppressed.
The alternative O'Neill grinned at him, mischievously, like he knew damned well why the man was smiling but was going to tease him anyway. "Something wrong, Doctor Jackson?"
"No. Thank you, Colonel O'Neill. Nothing at all." The alternative Daniel made the obviously huge effort to wrench the smile from his face. He cleared his throat and then looked back at Daniel. "That's what I mean. He's just…Jack." His expression clearly stated: How could you not be in love with him? He didn't need to state it aloud.
Jack looked to General Hammond with a flicker of desperation. "Sir? Is there some…strategic purpose to this meeting we could be moving along to right now?"
General Hammond cleared his throat. "I think that would be an excellent idea, Colonel."
Through the whirling of his brain, Jack had been vaguely relieved to discover that there was no crisis as such. SG-A's dimension wasn't under any imminent threat from the Goa'uld and the alternative universe they'd come from just had a different kind of daylight saving which meant their seven in the morning was the same as three in the morning on this world. General Hammond had sent out for reinforcements because the possibility of two of his men canoodling in front of him had been too hot a potato for him to want to handle by himself. Jack didn't even blame the man for panicking. He'd thought finding out he was married to Carter elsewhere had been as embarrassing as life got until now.
The alternative Daniel automatically sipped the coffee Hammond had sent out for, tongue flickering over his lower lip as he thought.
"So you see, it took us a lot longer to discover the naquada mirror than it obviously did you. And our first thought was that we should use it to try and pool information with our other selves on ways to defeat the Goa'uld. So this is really more of a…" He looked at the alternative O'Neill. "Jack, what are those missions called where you just go somewhere to find out stuff?"
"Reconnaissance? Fact-finding mission?"
Daniel nodded and gave General Hammond a shy smile. "What Jack said."
Sam had to hide a sudden smile of her own. She caught the eye of her alternative counterpart and saw the woman was also biting her lip to stop herself from grinning.
As Sam reached across to hand her other self a pen, she murmured, "They're so sweet together."
The alternative Carter whispered back, "I know."
As Sam sat back down, Daniel said without looking at her, "I heard that."
She winced. "Sorry, Daniel."
She realized she'd missed what the general and Colonel had been saying. The other Colonel was speaking now; he seemed to be suggesting a few informal meetings, and she couldn't help studying him to try and spot the differences between him and the Jack O'Neill she knew. Her first impression had been that they were identical but she could see tiny things now: he was definitely more relaxed, a little more confident, didn't seem to feel the need to take refuge in sarcasm, and, of course, he was wonderfully laid back with the other Daniel, whom, without wearing his heart on his sleeve in anyway, she was beginning to suspect he adored. She couldn't think of any other cause for how happy the other Daniel looked. With the kind of quiet contentment and confidence that came from not just being in love but knowing you were loved, absolutely and without question.
Besides these two, the Colonel and Daniel she knew looked much more stressed, edgy, and tired.
It was the alternative O'Neill's suggestion that he and his counterpart should confer while the two Daniels briefed each other on anything of anthropological significance they might have discovered.
"I mean," he gave the alternative Daniel a rueful look, "it's not like I'd understand anything the other Daniel was trying to tell me anyway."
The other Daniel smiled again. "Well, come to that I think the other Jack filling me in on military thingummies might be a bit of a waste of his time as well."
Jack nudged Daniel and then deliberately dropped his pencil on the floor. He gave Daniel a significant look and they both bent down to pick it up. Out of eye and earshot of the rest of the table, Jack whispered, "Is it me, or are those two so damned cutesy together they make you want to hurl?"
"I know!" Daniel hissed back. "God, do they put 'Just Married' on the back of every MALP they send through?"
"Even if you and me were doin' it, I bet we wouldn't be that sappy about it."
"Damned right."
They both straightened back up, Jack holding aloft the pencil in explanation. "Got it."
Daniel cleared his throat before saying, "I think that's an excellent idea, Colonel. Why don't…Doctor Jackson and I go and look at some of my mission reports while you and Jack talk about…" He bent his head towards Jack's, murmuring, "What did he want to talk to you about again?"
"The Goa'uld," Jack covered for him quickly. "We'll go talk about the Goa'uld."
Out of the corner of his eye, Daniel was aware of the alternative Carter leaning across to murmur something to Sam. He just caught: "Your two are pretty sweet together as well." By the way Jack was gritting his teeth next to him he figured the older man had heard that one as well. He gave Jack a sideways look and the man gave him a reassuring pat on the arm. "It's okay, they can only stay a few hours."
Sam collected herself and addressed her other self: "Oh, that reminds me, are you aware of the problems of entropic cascade failure?"
The other Carter's eyes widened. "I had theorized it could be a problem but the physics of alternative dimensions is so new that I wasn't really…"
The two Jacks were on their feet in an instant.
"I really think you Carters can talk that one through without the rest of us," the other O'Neill said quickly.
"But, sir, you need to be aware that…"
"You said we could only stay a few hours before we set out, right?"
"Yes, sir, but Major Carter has just confirmed that…"
"And you're still saying we can only stay a few hours, right?"
"Yes, sir, but…"
"So, Colonel O'Neill and I really didn't ought to waste a minute then, did we?" The other O'Neill looked at General Hammond and said politely, "If that's okay with you, sir?"
General Hammond nodded, "Be my guest, Colonels. Doctors Jackson."
The two Jacks were out of the door so fast even the two Daniels were a little taken by surprise. The other Daniel looked at the other Carter and Teal'c. "Are you two going to be okay if I go and talk to…myself for a bit?"
The other Teal'c gravely inclined his head. "My other self and I will compare our knowledge of the Goa'uld in our respective dimensions, Daniel Jackson. It may be that we each have information the other does not."
"Sam?"
The other Carter nodded. "They've been studying the physics of this for longer than we have so I'd really like to get a look at their data." She and Sam were already immersed in another discussion on entropic cascade failure before the other Daniel had turned to his SG-1 counterpart. "Shall we?"
Daniel had thought it would be weird talking to himself but it was almost worryingly easy to get used to. He'd thought the effort of not asking the obvious questions: What about Sha're? When had the other Daniel started seeing the other Jack that way and why for crying out loud? would make it difficult for him to concentrate on anything else, but the anthropological and archaeological discoveries each had made were so fascinating they quickly absorbed all of his attention. For the first time he could discuss the Minoan culture preserved in the Land of Light with someone who understood what he was talking about, had been asking the same questions and in some cases who had come up with slightly different answers. It dawned on them both at the same moment: this might be the only chance they ever got to have a conversation with someone who really understood what they were talking about, and both couldn't help a sudden grin of pleased recognition spreading over their features.
Daniel darted a quick look at his watch and said with a sigh, "We aren't going to have enough time for this."
The other Daniel helped himself to coffee. "We need to concentrate on the differences we've discovered. Do you have any cookies?"
"Sure," Daniel pushed him the jar as he turned the pages in his early journals, "So okay you went to P34…"
They had covered most of the main points now. Compared notes on Nasty Goa'uld We Have Encountered. Swapped weapons – the two zat guns looked identical, so did the MP-5s, and the examples of hand devices, and the various weapons SG-A had brought with them seemed to be able to function perfectly well in a different dimension. Jack had passed over all the information he had on every hostile or friendly they'd encountered that SG-A hadn't and how the other team should go about contacting them or avoiding them. As far as he was concerned, his duty was pretty much done.
The other O'Neill was looking at him with a wry expression on his face as he finished his coffee. "You don't like me, do you?"
Jack shrugged. "I don't know you."
"Colonel, I'm you, there's nothing you don't know about me…except for the obvious difference between us, and so I'm figuring that's where the problem lies. Is it?"
Jack returned his gaze expressionlessly. "As you're probably aware, Colonel, I was never very good at guessing games so I think you'll have to spell it out for me."
"Okay. I'm guessing you have a problem with me having sex with a man. Am I right?"
"Nope."
Jack said it with such complete conviction the other O'Neill frowned. "Come on! It's been burning you up since I got here."
"You can sleep with all the men you like, makes no damned difference to me."
"So this isn't the: 'How could you do it? You used to be a married man!' speech then?"
"Nope. I'm presuming Sara left you the same way she left me. After that I figure what you did was up to you."
"So what's the problem? Don't tell me there isn't a problem because I know damn well there is. If it isn't the fact I have sex with a man on a fairly regular basis, what is it?"
Jack gritted his teeth. "You don't have sex with 'a man', Colonel. You have sex with Daniel."
"And so?"
"Daniel."
As O'Neill stared at him in perplexity, Jack shook his head. "Oh come on, we both know who we're talking about here. Doctor Daniel Jackson. A guy so innocent he is barely safe to be let out without a keeper. Someone who, after his wife was stolen and his life was stolen and who came back home to Earth to find he was legally dead and had no home, no job, and no identity, was sleeping on your couch because he had nowhere else to go. Someone who trusted you. Someone who relied on you. Someone who would have believed any damned thing you chose to tell him."
"What's your point, Colonel?"
Jack glared at him. "I'm just saying I know the score. I know when Daniel first joined SG-1 he was so out of his depth, so spaced out on too much caffeine and not enough sleep, the only thing he still knew for sure was that we were going to get his wife back and he could trust me to take care of him. Christ, if I'd told him to take off all his clothes so I could lather him in baby oil because it was a special Air Force waterproofing technique for wet weather conditions, he would have believed me…!"
"Oh boy – " Daniel's hand had been outstretched to tap lightly on the open door when he'd heard the end of that sentence. He backed up to find the other Daniel standing there with his mouth open and his eyes very big and blue with astonishment. Daniel winced apologetically, "Jack gets a little…you know – "
"Oh – I know."
"So that's what this is about?" O'Neill put down his empty coffee mug. "You think I 'took advantage' of Daniel?"
"I know damned well you must have done! He was a married man. He loved his wife. No way would it have ever occurred to him to go off and have sex with you unless you told him to. Damnit, he trusted you!"
" 'Told him to'? You think Daniel is so easy to manipulate he'd go and have sex with someone just because they told him to – ?"
"I'm saying you were in a position of trust and you abused it! Christ, his parents are dead, his wife is missing, he's in a very emotionally vulnerable state and you're the only person he even recognizes. And he gets drunk after one bottle of beer, which you must have known very well – "
Daniel emitted a soft groan and began to bang the back of his head gently against the wall.
The other Daniel was still looking wide-eyed. "Boy, and I thought my Jack was a little over-protective, but your Jack is seriously…"
"I wish you'd stop calling him 'your Jack'," Daniel protested faintly.
"You want me to call him 'the Jack from your dimension' every time?"
"Well – it would be less open to misinterpretation." Daniel winced again. "They're getting very loud in there."
"…and I think your words show a fundamental lack of understanding of and respect for both of our Daniels. The Daniel in my dimension would never allow himself to be manipulated, persuaded or emotionally blackmailed into doing something he didn't want to do and I don't suppose…"
"Well they look pretty damned similar to me and the Daniel in my dimension would, okay? You just don't want to admit you took advantage of someone you knew it would be a piece of cake to get into bed!"
"I resent that on Daniel's behalf as well as my own!"
The other Daniel looked at his counterpart in mild indignation. "So your Jack thinks we're what – ? Easy? Stupid?"
"Innocent," Daniel sighed. "He thinks we're innocent and inclined to think people have better motives than maybe they do."
"Why the hell would he think that?"
Daniel tried not to look embarrassed as images of himself being married to Sha're and not even knowing it were followed in quick succession by memories of being seduced by Hathor, Shyla, Kira… He cleared his throat. "Well, you know Jack. He gets an idea in his head and he just can't shift it."
Hearing the two Jacks come to a temporary pause in their argument, Daniel hastily knocked on the door. "Jack? Colonel? According to the Sams our visitors' time is pretty much up."
The door was opened to reveal a Jack who looked less than happy but was clearly making an effort to disguise it. "Hey, Daniel. You okay?"
"Fine. You?"
"Fine." Jack looked past Daniel's shoulder and nodded to the other Daniel. "Doctor Jackson."
"Colonel O'Neill." The other Daniel looked past Jack to the O'Neill from his dimension, expression at once questioning and reassuring.
Although he still looked angry, the other O'Neill had a smile for 'his' Daniel at once. "So did you two have fun?"
"Well we've certainly managed to exchange a lot of information, but it would be helpful if we could continue this discussion somewhere – or rather somehow – and Sam suggested a way we might be able to meet up at least one more time…" The other's Daniel's voice trailed off as he saw the pained expression on 'his' Jack's face was matched only by the grimace on the other Jack's.
"How?" Jack said at once. Seeing the other Daniel wilt a little at his abruptness he turned to the Daniel he knew. "I mean…how?"
"Sam suggested we visited their dimension, Jack. The entropic cascade thing would still kick in but we'd have a few hours. Apparently Teal'c and Teal'c are building up quite a nice rapport and Sam and other Sam are solving all kinds of astrophysics problems and Doctor Jackson and I would certainly like a chance to compare notes for a little longer, so as long as you and um Colonel O'Neill…"
Jack grimaced again. "Oh Colonel O'Neill and I have been getting along like a house on fire, Daniel."
The other Daniel was giving the other O'Neill a pleading look Daniel recognized immediately. It was one he'd found generally worked on the Jack he knew so he wasn't exactly surprised when O'Neill sighed in defeat before saying, "Well as long as Colonel O'Neill has no objection, why don't we invite everyone to the SGC for dinner next week?"
Jack turned to look at the other man. "How very civilized."
"The other members of our teams would apparently find it useful."
"Well I'm certainly not going to be the party pooper, Colonel. As long as my General and your General are agreeable, we gratefully accept your cordial invitation."
It took less than ten minutes to have the departing SG-A rounded up and assembled on the ramp. The co-ordinates for the place where the mirror was had been given to Sam and Daniel, both of whom waved off their other selves with genuine affection and regret at seeing them go. The two Teal'c's nodded impassively to each other in a way that nevertheless seemed to denote deep respect. Jack and O'Neill shook hands briskly, determinedly not making eye contact as they did so.
"Until Friday then, Colonel."
"8pm your time."
"We'll look forward to it."
The four team-members headed up the ramp and disappeared into the blue light. The wormhole lingered for a moment and then evaporated.
Jack gave a visible sigh of relief. "Jerk."
"Jack – " It was the mildest reproach and warning from Daniel.
Jack gave him a stern look. "Don't start with me, Daniel."
"I'm just…saying."
"I don't care."
Carter said quickly, "The other me says he's a wonderful commanding officer, sir."
"My alternative counterpart also holds him in high esteem, O'Neill."
"Don't care." He held up a warning finger to Daniel. "And don't even think about telling me how much your other self likes him."
"I really don't think he made the other me do anything he didn't want to do, Jack."
Seeing a whole bunch of airmen around who were clearly all agog to hear more, Jack glanced around and then nodded to Daniel. "Can we take this somewhere else? Like my office? Somewhere with a door that closes?"
Daniel wished Jack wouldn't do that: stride off determinedly like Daniel was a dog that didn't always come when he was called but might follow as long as he kept walking. Trailing after him reluctantly, Daniel murmured, "Because of course a closed door is going to be so much use when you start yelling."
Jack shot him a suspicious glance over his shoulder. "What?"
"What?" Daniel countered, face a careful blank.
Jack pulled open his office door and waved Daniel inside. He didn't actually say 'Sit!' but the way he pointed at the chair came close.
Daniel gave him a speaking look before sitting down, wanting it made clear he was doing this because he wanted to and not because Jack had told him to. Then he waited resignedly for Jack to start exercising his lungs.
"I'm not going to yell," Jack said at once.
Daniel looked unconvinced.
"I'm just saying that if we go there I don't think you should be alone with that guy."
Daniel frowned. "The other me?"
"No, Daniel. The other me. For reasons that I would hope would be obvious."
"I think he's very happy with the Daniel he's got, Jack. Or were you thinking he might want the matched set?"
"Who hasn't had a fantasy about doing it with twins?"
"Well…me for one."
Jack frowned. "You're kidding me? Never? Not even Swedish ones?"
Daniel gave him a level stare. "Don't judge everyone by yourself, Jack."
"But this guy is me, Daniel, and I do want to do it with twins, so you don't get to be alone with him, okay?"
"But, there are still differences between the two dimensions that…"
Jack held up a finger. "Sorry, didn't I make myself clear? That wasn't a request. That was an order."
"I'm just saying he seemed like a perfectly decent human being to me."
"Rubbish. He probably handcuffs the other you to the bed every chance he gets."
"What? So you're into bondage as well as doing it with twins?"
"No. Well…none of your business. Just stay the hell away from him, okay?"
Daniel looked at him for a long moment and then nodded. "Okay, I know what this is. You think just because the other you and the other me fell in love with each other the other you is somehow going to be able to persuade me to fall in love with him as well. In three hours? Jack, could we possibly have a reality check here?"
"Well if we're talking reality, those two did not 'fall in love'. What happened was the son-of-a-bitch other me totally took advantage of the other you while he was emotionally vulnerable and the other you is staying with him because he's so damned insecure and in need of respect and validation…and why the hell are you looking at me like that?"
"Because sometimes you are just so…"
"Insightful? Right?"
"Tactless and wrong." Daniel glared at him and then folded his arms. "And how come you're so sure the other you seduced the other me? Maybe it was…mutual. Or just maybe the other me seduced the other you. Did you ever think about that?"
"Oh don't be silly, Daniel."
"Why is that silly?"
"Have you ever seduced anyone in your entire life?"
Daniel was about to make a vehement assertion that yes, of course, he'd…when memories of his love-life asserted themselves so strongly that he had to scowl, grit his teeth and mutter, "Well…no, actually. Not in this dimension anyway. Have you?"
"Yes," Jack told him unhesitatingly.
Daniel felt even more deflated. "Oh. Well I still resent the suggestion that the only reason you and I aren't together is because you chose not to seduce me. I think I might have had an opinion on the subject as well and… And we really shouldn't do this, should we?"
Jack met his gaze with an embarrassed look of his own. "We definitely shouldn't do this."
"There all kinds of…"
"Snares. Pits."
"Reasons why this is something we really don't want to do."
Jack nodded. "Okay, let's change the subject. Tell me what you and you managed to learn about cultural development type things?"
Daniel gave him a sideways look. "Why? Are you desperate to catch up on your sleep or something?"
"Are you trying to suggest I might not find everything you say interesting?"
"Jack, you want to hear about what the other me and I have deduced about Minoan culture like I want to hear how a zat gun works in an alternate universe."
"Daniel you know how a zat gun works in an alternate universe: you got zatted in one."
Daniel blinked. "That's a point."
"What?"
"I wonder if the other me has to pretend not to be bored by all that weapons talk you go in for. I mean they're a…couple, aren't they? And couples are supposed to be interested in everything the other one says, so I guess he probably does. Poor guy."
Jack considered the point. "Well I hope the other me has to fake an interest in anthropology every damned night to get his…" He darted a glance at Daniel and then coughed. "Well, I hope he does anyway. I hope the other you makes him listen for hours. It would serve the exploitative son-of-a-bitch right."
"I wonder if the other you has ever given the other me the lecture on why SG-3 have M-15s instead of MP-5s."
"M-16s, Daniel, for the forty-fifth time."
"Because I have to say that one is unbelievably tedio…" Daniel suddenly realized what he was saying and coughed. "I'm just saying there have to be a few downsides to having a partner with whom you have…"
"Absolutely zip in common?"
"In fact, I'm finding it a little difficult to think what the upside could possibly be."
"Don't ask Carter because she'll probably tell you."
Daniel looked at him sideways. "How would Sam know better than you or me?"
"Daniel, just think a minute. Supposing, in this dimension, you met someone, thought you'd fallen in love and started sleeping with them. Who would you talk to about it?"
"Sam."
"Exactly. And she would ask for all the gory details, because women do, and you'd probably tell her because it wouldn't occur to you not to. And then when Carter met up with herself in an alternate universe she might just go ahead and tell herself everything you'd told her because it wouldn't be breaking a confidence to tell yourself something like that, now would it?"
Daniel pulled a face. "So you think Sam may know…?"
"Everything there is to know about when, where, and how often. So, please don't ask her, for both our sakes."
There was a pause before Daniel said, "And you're going to be okay about this dinner on Friday night?"
"I'm sure I can survive it."
"And you're not going to be…" Daniel hesitated, trying to think of a tactful way to say 'all weird and over-protective', "um…stressed and hostile?"
"Am I ever?"
Daniel darted a glance at the man, but Jack's face was unreadable; impossible to tell if he was joking or not. He cleared his throat. "Right. Silly question."
***
"So?" Colonel Jack O'Neill of SG-1 picked up his fork and then put it down again.
"So." Colonel Jack O'Neill of SG-A moved his wine glass two inches to the left.
"This is a little…"
"Unusual?"
"See, I was going to say 'awkward'."
Doctor Daniel Jackson of SG-A looked up at that and gave SG-1's O'Neill a reassuring smile. "It's only awkward if we let it be, Colonel."
Jack's return smile was chilly. "A little difficult for it not to be awkward, under the circumstances, wouldn't you say?"
Daniel kicked Jack smartly on the ankle and the man barely stifled a yelp of pain.
Glaring at Daniel, Jack deliberately dropped his fork on the floor, jerking his head at Daniel as he did so. As they bent down out of eye and earshot, Jack hissed accusingly, "You kicked me!"
Daniel hissed back, "Leave the other me alone. You're scaring him."
"Why? I'm not the one who wants to rip his clothes off and…"
Daniel held up a warning finger. "Don't go there."
"Too late, I think the other me already did." Ignoring Daniel's most withering stare, Jack added in a hiss, "And this is a complete waste of time."
"You only have to be civil for two more hours, Jack, I would have thought even you could manage that."
Jack and Daniel both straightened back up, gave each other another glare and then turned back to their dining companions with expressions of calm plastered onto their faces.
Sam said quickly, "So, Doctor Jackson, unlike our Daniel, you didn't pass through the naquada mirror on P3R-233?"
"No, that's right. We went there and Sam and I – I mean our Sam and I went in there and saw at once that it had to be some kind of museum because it was full of all those incredible specimens."
"A treasure chest of artifacts from diverse human cultures," Daniel put in quietly.
"But then Jack said it was time to go, so we left."
Jack frowned. "So – Doctor Jackson, let me get this straight, when…Colonel O'Neill told you to pack it up out of there, you went?"
The other Daniel blinked in surprise. "Of course."
"You didn't bitch about it? You didn't figure you needed to go and fill a bag full of things first? You didn't feel an overwhelming urge to go fiddle with that mirror rather than doing what you'd been told?"
"Well, no, I mean Jack had just told me the whole place could be radioactive and so…"
"Oh!" Daniel sat up straight so fast he banged his legs on the table, making the unused cutlery dance and everyone's wine slop against the sides of their glasses. "So - Colonel O'Neill told you why he wanted you to leave?"
"Well, of course." The other Daniel turned to the other O'Neill in obvious confusion.
The other O'Neill shrugged. "Teal'c recognized the symbol the Goa'uld had left warning anyone who came after them the place wasn't fit for anything except a microwave graveyard, so my first priority was to get my team out straight away. I told Carter and Daniel what was going on and we got out of there."
"But you told them why?" Daniel stressed. "You didn't, for instance, just say 'We're out of here' or," Daniel darted 'his' Jack a steely glance before turning back to the other O'Neill, " 'Daniel I don't want to hear it.'."
The other O'Neill half-smiled. "Yeah, like Daniel would really respond well to that when he's just found a room full of artifacts. Even I could see what he had there was a significant find. The people there had basically done our work for us, going out and stealing from so many different civilizations and then obligingly labeling them for us." He glanced back at the other Daniel for confirmation and the man nodded emphatically. O'Neill went on, "So, once I'd got everyone home safely, we sent the Geiger Counter bunnies in to check that room out, and then everything was brought back and decontaminated. You had a lot of fun with that, didn't you?" He looked at the other Daniel fondly.
The other Daniel half-smiled as he looked at his plate, "Oh yeah, like a whole bunch of Christmasses had come at once."
The other O'Neill looked across at Daniel. "So, it didn't pan out that way for you then?"
"No. Not exactly." Daniel moistened his lips. "I got to go through the mirror, see the world destroyed and get shot in the shoulder by an alternative Teal'c. Which was another way to go."
The other Daniel gaped at him, "You didn't get to examine the Etruscan artifacts from what we think was P2Z-677?"
Daniel forced a bleak smile. "No, I never did. Our Medical Containment people just grabbed the mirror and nothing else. It was decided it was too risky bringing anything else back when we didn't know what it might do."
"We also got to save our world from being destroyed by Apophis thanks to Daniel going through the mirror," Sam said quickly. "If he hadn't, we'd all be dead by now."
The other O'Neill inserted the tip of the corkscrew into the next bottle of wine and began to twist the handle. "Sounds like it turned out well for both of us then."
"Doesn't it hurt?" The other Daniel looked across at his counterpart. "Getting shot by a staff weapon? The one time it happened to me I was dead before I hit the floor so I can't say I really felt it."
"Oh boy yes," Daniel said then stared. "What? You've never been shot by a serpent guard?"
"Don't put ideas in his head," the other O'Neill said, pulling out the cork. He offered Daniel more wine. "There are some new cultural experiences that are better left untried."
"I couldn't agree more." Jack leaned across to Daniel and murmured, "No more wine, Daniel. You know you can't drink."
Daniel had been about to refuse a second glass but now he smiled at the other O'Neill and said, "Thank you," before giving Jack a glare in return.
Teal'c raised an eyebrow. "So, how then did you know the co-ordinates to defeat Apophis?"
"We were sent a message Daniel deciphered telling us to beware the destroyers and the 'gate address they came from." O'Neill offered Teal'c wine politely which the Jaffa equally politely refused. He just raised his eyebrow at the Teal'c from his own dimension. "Can I tempt you from that kel no reem path of temperance and clean-living just this once, Teal'c?"
The other Teal'c tried and failed to suppress a smile. "No, O'Neill."
"You're too damned virtuous. Puts the rest of us to shame. Carter? You're not going to turn me down now, are you?"
The other Major held up her wine glass. "Depends on what you're offering, sir."
He gave her a wicked smile in return as he filled her glass. "Now, now, Major, keep it clean. Remember we have two young and impressionable Daniels here tonight."
"So you 'gated to Apophis' ship?" Sam put in a little impatiently, wanting to get the conversation back to parallel physics and its consequences. "The same as us?"
Discussing the details of the two missions, they seemed to be identical up until the moment when Jack had left Daniel in the corridor. "…so I left Teal'c to guard the corridor and…"
"Why Teal'c?" Jack demanded. "The corridor looked like being the safest place."
"Well we just always have Teal'c guarding our rears on missions. He seemed the obvious choice. And it was lucky I did because three serpent guards came straight round the corner and I don't think anyone except Teal'c could have taken those guys out without getting shot in the process. Why? You did something different?"
Daniel looked at Jack's bleak face and said quickly, "Well, it sounds like the end result was the same. You blew up his ships and all got out alive and so did we."
Sam gave her other self a pleading look and the other women said, "Of course, we couldn't figure out the purpose of the mirror for a long time because we didn't realize the hand device was what activated it. They weren't made from the same substance and there seemed no obvious connection between them. I was struggling with it for years before I got it to work."
Jack said to his other self, "Did you go to Hadante?"
O'Neill nodded. "Yeah." He deliberately didn't look at his Daniel, keeping his gaze on Jack. "I think that's when the grey hair really started to kick in."
"Know the feeling."
The other Daniel frowned. "It wasn't that bad, Jack. I mean it was…creepy, but…" He shrugged. "We've been in worse situations, I never know why you and Teal'c always make such a big deal out of that place." He looked across at Daniel. "Jack just went into manic leader overdrive on Hadante. Talk about hit the ground running. He was so keen to get out of there, he wouldn't listen to a damned thing I told him."
Daniel put down the wine glass. "Ditto."
"I told him Linnea could be dangerous."
"I told our Jack the same thing."
"We were only there…what? An afternoon?"
"I know, would it have killed him to wait a little longer and try to find a safer way out of there?"
Jack and O'Neill exchanged an expressive glance. "Well maybe we had our reasons," Jack said. "And, if you remember, Daniel, in that afternoon you managed to pick a fight with the biggest, ugliest guy on the planet and damn near get yourself killed."
"Oh, come on, you totally over-reacted to that place, Jack, and I can't believe you still won't admit it."
Jack and O'Neill exchanged another look. Jack said, "I'm sorry, I have to ask. What effect did Shyla have on…you know…didn't it cause any arguments between you?"
"Who?" said O'Neill.
"Who's Shyla?" the other Daniel frowned.
"Who's…?" Daniel looked at him in guilty astonishment. "You don't know who she is?"
The other Daniel shook his head, "No. Should I?"
"It doesn't matter," Jack said quickly. "Forget I asked. It was a stupid thing to bring up anyway."
"No. I need to know what happened," Daniel put in. "Are you telling me you never went to P3R-636?"
The other Jack and Daniel exchanged a glance of bewilderment and then the other Daniel sat up straight and looked guilty. "Oh God, Jack, that was the place where I stopped that girl killing herself and we all got thrown into the naquada mines."
"And this had slipped your mind?" Jack demanded.
"Well we weren't there very long." The other Daniel looked at O'Neill. "What was it? Twenty-four hours?"
"Twenty four hours?" Daniel echoed. "We were there for days! I mean, they were in the mines, I was in the…"
Jack put a hand on his arm and stilled him. He addressed O'Neill: "The escape plan worked for you?"
"Yes." The man looked surprised that Jack even had to ask. "The second day, when they came to unchain us, Teal'c and I jumped the guards and we got the hell out of there. Carter and Daniel were in the infirmary for about a day afterwards because their blood sugar had dropped a little, but apart from that it wasn't too bad. Of course, it didn't do my knees a lot of good, but…"
"The second day?" Jack pressed. "Why not the first day?"
O'Neill frowned as he tried to remember. "Well in our dimension the guard who was unchaining us took so long doing it the moment had passed. There was a time I did think about jumping him but Daniel was still chained up and he was really beat, there was no way he was going to be able to make it and I figured we'd get another chance if we just sat tight a little longer and the next day we did."
"But the next day he'd have been even more tired." Realizing that he was sounding way too agitated here, Jack cleared his throat. "I mean that was what I figured."
"Well Teal'c and I helped Carter and Daniel out as much as we could the next day and I told him in plenty of time what we were planning to do so he was ready for it. And, let's face it they're both pretty tough and determined, aren't they? We were lucky, I guess, but it worked out for us and we got the hell off that world."
The other Daniel was looking at his counterpart's stricken face. "Did something different happen with you?"
"You could say that." Daniel put down his fork in a way that suggested he wasn't going to be picking it up again.
"What happened?"
"I screwed up," Jack and Daniel both said it in the same breath and then looked at each other.
Jack tightened his grip on Daniel's arm. "I screwed up. I rushed the escape, Daniel was still chained up and he damned near got killed. That bitch of a princess you both went out of your way to save got him addicted to the sarcophagus. It really messed around with his head but he still managed to persuade her father to let us go. So we all got to go home as well, just not as fast."
"That wasn't how it was, Jack," Daniel said quietly.
"Yes. It was."
Daniel looked across at his other self. "Jack's missing out the part about me leaving them down in the mines to nearly die of overwork for ten days while I played around with Shyla. Not to mention the moment when I put a gun in his face and nearly pulled the trigger."
Jack winced. "Danny, let's not do this now. I should never have brought it up. I'm sorry."
After a moment's awkward silence, the other Daniel said suddenly, "You call him 'Danny'? Jack only calls me 'Danny' when we're…" He broke off abruptly, faked a very unconvincing coughing fit and got pounded on the back by the other O'Neill.
The other Daniel kept his gaze fixed on the tablecloth as he said in a small voice, "Could I have another glass of wine, please, Jack?"
"I think you've had enough," the man told him good-humoredly, but he nevertheless reached across and filled his glass for him.
Sam was afraid to look at either Jack or Daniel and was aware of Teal'c sitting next to her studiously avoiding the space around his counterpart's ear.
Daniel risked a quick sideways glance at Jack and saw at once that the 'Danny' thing was bothering him a lot less than his own tactlessness in having brought up Shyla. Before he could think of a change of subject to make the man feel better, the other O'Neill said conversationally, "So, anyone? Your least favourite Goa'uld? And you can't all say 'Apophis' because that's just too damned easy."
Jack looked relieved at the change of subject. "Well, Hathor is at the top of my Most Happy She's Dead list."
"That bitch." The other O'Neill looked momentarily murderous.
The two Daniels exchanged a guilty glance. The other Daniel said tentatively, "Did she try to turn your Jack into a Goa'uld as well?"
"Right in front of us," Sam said, to save Daniel having to answer. "I was so happy when the Colonel turned her into a Popsicle."
"Yeah, that was fun." The other O'Neill shot a brief glance in the direction of his Daniel. "Payback always is."
"Well, I really hate Nirrti," the other Carter said.
"I'm with you on that," Sam nodded. "Another total bitch."
"Cronos," ground out the two Teal'c's in unison.
"Looks like Sokar barely made the top five." Jack finished his wine. "Boy will he be pissed."
Daniel leant across the table and looked at his other self. "I'm sorry, I have to ask. Is Sha're alive or dead in your dimension?"
The other Daniel looked at his half-empty plate. "Dead."
"I'm sorry."
The two Teal'c's looked across at each other in a brief moment of recognition and then averted their eyes.
"It's okay." The other Daniel made the effort to meet his counterpart's gaze. "I knew she was gone. I knew that was it from when she looked right through me the second time. Apophis said 'Kill the rest' and she didn't even blink. That's when I knew she was gone and Amaunet was in charge. I think I did most of my mourning a long time before she died. Now, I'm just relieved that she isn't having to endure that terrible half-life any more. But I knew from the beginning I'd never get her back. I knew she was gone."
Jack and Daniel both noticed the way the other O'Neill automatically put out his right hand and rubbed the other Daniel's back as he was talking, not even seeming to know he was doing it.
"I didn't," said Daniel.
The other O'Neill raised an eyebrow. "I'm sorry?"
"I didn't know I wasn't going to get Sha're back. I really thought I was."
O'Neill said again, "I'm sorry," but very gently this time.
"I was lucky," the other Daniel rallied. "I had Jack to get me through it."
"So did I," Daniel returned with emphasis. After a slight pause he said, "And Sam and Teal'c, and even General Hammond and Janet Fraiser did their best. I had a lot of people helping me get through it. I got through it." He read in the other Daniel's eyes that the man thought the assistance Daniel had been given had nevertheless been inferior to the support of 'his' Jack.
After another awkward silence, the other Daniel said, "Do you suppose there are any more of Machello's little booby-traps out there?"
"Machello?" Daniel looked up.
Jack was also on alert in a second. "You mean the psycho-slugs from the page-turning device?"
"Oh you've met those as well, have you?" The other O'Neill drained his glass. "Weren't they a barrel of laughs?"
Daniel shivered. "That was not a fun trip."
The other Daniel also looked pale. "You're telling me. I really thought I was losing my mind."
"The dead Goa'uld on the ramp."
"The event horizon in the closet."
"The Goa'uld trying to get into Jack."
"Oh that was the worst."
"The footsteps. The dead Goa'uld next to Teal'c." Daniel shivered again and then looked up to find the other Daniel and O'Neill frowning at him in perplexity.
"What?" the other Daniel said.
"When the others came to see you? You didn't hear footsteps?"
"No. What happened with me was that Doctor Mackenzie and Janet diagnosed me as having schizophrenia, but of course Jack wasn't buying that. He thought it was just stress."
"Absolutely," Jack nodded. "I thought the same thing."
"So they medicated me and put me in one of the VIP rooms."
"Same with me."
"And, obviously, Jack stayed with me to keep an eye on me and see that I was okay. And then I saw this Goa'uld climbing up his arm and with one part of my mind I knew it wasn't real but there was this other part thinking 'What if it is? This is my last chance to grab it.' So I tried to grab it and then Jack knew I was really having problems. I remember feeling really sick and faint, and him helping me lie down on the floor, and then there was all this yelling…" He looked at the other O'Neill, "And you remember this way better than I do so you ought to tell it."
The other O'Neill shrugged. "Well, basically, Mackenzie and Janet wanted to pack him off to a padded cell. They wanted to pump him full of drugs and lock him up for his 'own protection'. So, of course, I told them no way in hell were they doing that to Daniel. They could carry him back to the infirmary and they could find out what was wrong with him and they could keep damned well looking until they came up with a better answer than 'Daniel's a schizophrenic and it's caused by 'gate travel.'"
Daniel was afraid to look at Jack and yet he had a terrible compulsion to do so; it was like driving past an accident, even though you knew the sight of it would horrify you, something tugged at your left eyeball trying to make you look that way.
It was the other Daniel who happened to glance across at Jack and so saw the stricken look on his face.
Daniel saw his counterpart's expression change, the realization and compassion in those blue eyes which were suddenly turned in his direction. He knew he was probably looking a little pale and shaken as well. The other O'Neill was still talking. Telling them about all the tests he'd made Janet run, how they'd finally seen that little slug under Daniel's skin and realized that it must have gone into him in the Linvris chamber.
Sam abruptly got to her feet. "Sir, I'm sorry to break up the party, but I think we should be going."
Jack also stood up. It seemed to take him a moment to find his voice. "Thank you, Colonel, for a very interesting evening. If our Carters can ever get this ectopic what-ever-it-is sorted out, perhaps we can meet up again."
***
Daniel was barely aware of anything except Jack as they made their way to the 'gate room. He knew how hard that last exchange must have hit the man. They'd both thought Jack had done everything he could to help him through that Linvris business given how far he was out of his depth, but now Jack would be thinking he should have insisted on Daniel being kept in the infirmary the way this other O'Neill had done. Daniel wondered if there was any way to convince the man he was actually glad now that…
"Doctor Jackson?" Daniel started as he realized someone had been saying his name gently for a little while now. He collected himself and looked up to find the face he saw in the mirror every morning gazing at him compassionately. "Can we talk?"
Daniel checked his watch. "Now?"
"Sam says we have a few more minutes. I think there's things you maybe need to know; things you might always wonder about."
Daniel nodded and followed his other self into an office which he realized was very like his own, except that dotted around the picture of Sha're on the desk were half a dozen photographs of the other Jack or the other Jack and the other Daniel together. He picked one up and examined it. It showed the two of them standing underneath the pyramids at Giza with their arms comfortably around each other's shoulders, hair disheveled by the wind. "This is nice. Were you on holiday?"
"I took Jack to Egypt last winter. Much to his surprise he had a pretty good time."
Daniel put the photograph back down on the desk. "I hope he didn't make you pay for it by watching a million hockey games while he explained all the stupid rules for the hundredth time."
The other Daniel gave a little smile. "Um – I've pretty much weaned my Jack away from the Friday night is hockey night thing."
"Really? How?" As the other gave him an amused glance, realization kicked in and Daniel held up a hand. "Okay, I get you. Don't tell me how."
"Don't you want to know how we got together?" The other Daniel prompted gently.
Daniel sat down on the other side of the long table and wrapped his arms around his chest. "I don't know. Do I?"
"Your Jack certainly seemed to have got the wrong end of the stick."
"He was just looking out for my – your – our best interests and he always thinks the worst of himself. Which, in this instance, meant that he thought the worst of the Jack in your dimension as well."
"That's what I told my Jack when I got back. I pointed out to him that if before we'd got together we'd traveled to an alternative dimension and found a Jack and Daniel who were together, he would have been the first person to leap to a whole bunch of erroneous conclusions about how that had come about. He'd have probably presumed the other Jack was a completely selfish bastard who'd emotionally blackmailed me into bed and was always making me do things I didn't want to do."
Daniel realized the other Daniel thought of him and Jack not as two people who were not together but as two people who were not yet together. He wondered if there was any point in putting him right about that, but then decided to hold his breath. This Daniel was clearly very happy with 'his' Jack and no doubt wanted to believe every Daniel in every dimension was one day going to find the same happiness with the Jack they knew. Why spoil the fantasy for him by pointing out that wonderful as it must be to have your best friend for a lover, that there were always losses to balance the gains?
Daniel said, "You were going to tell me how the two of you…got together?"
"Oh yes. You remember Nem?"
Daniel swallowed as the remembrance of pain tightened in his mind. "Vividly."
"You remember he said the memory device might be fatal?"
"Yes."
"That was when I realized I was in love with Jack. Because, I didn't care, I knew anything was better than never seeing Jack again. That I would definitely rather be dead than never see Jack again."
Daniel nodded. Not very different then. He'd had a vivid recollection of everyone who mattered to him in that moment: Sha're, Jack, Sam, Teal'c, and had come to the same conclusion, that life without them literally wasn't worth living. With this Daniel it had clearly just been focused on Jack – a tiny difference which had created a pretty significant divergence.
"And then you went home?" he prompted.
The other Daniel nodded. "But I couldn't stop thinking about that realization – that somehow I'd stupidly let myself fall in love with Jack and I was so scared and miserable, I can't tell you. It felt like the end of the world. I didn't know how I was going to go on working with him. I was so afraid he'd realize and hate me or despise me. I couldn't bear the thought of losing his…"
"Respect." Daniel said the word softly. Not even troubling to make it a question.
"Yes. Exactly."
"Well, I don't want to leap to any rash conclusions, but I'm figuring that didn't happen?"
The other Daniel couldn't repress a grin. "No. What happened was I couldn't bear it any longer. I got out of bed and went round to his place at three in the morning and told him we needed to talk. He was kind of weird with me at first – and I thought he'd realized, you know…Turns out when he'd thought I was dead he'd realized he was in love with me. So, he was thinking I must have noticed how odd he was behaving and come round to challenge him about it. Meanwhile, I thought he was being so off with me because he'd realized I was in love with him…Oh boy. Yeah. Took us a while to get that one sorted out, I can tell you."
"I can imagine."
"But once we had…" the other Daniel dropped his head a little but Daniel saw the flicker of that smile of remembrance. "Wow!"
Daniel smiled himself. "I'm happy for you. Jack's a very decent human being – in any dimension – and you seem to have yours particularly…well-trained."
"Well he's always been pretty laid back and good-tempered," the other Daniel shrugged.
"Laid back?" Daniel raised an eyebrow. "Good-tempered?"
"And although he's not that interested in archaeology, he's always willing to listen."
"Really?" Daniel stared at him blankly for a minute before understanding hit him. "He doesn't want to…take it into the bedroom every time you start talking about hieroglyphs then?"
The other Daniel opened his mouth to say something then frowned. "Um…well…we do end up there quite a lot, but I don't think it's an avoidance tactic, or anything."
"No." Daniel kept his face a careful blank. "That wouldn't be Jack's way of handling a situation at all."
The other Daniel looked reassured. "No. It wouldn't."
Daniel looked at his watch to hide a smile. "I really think I have to get going."
The others were waiting for them in the 'gate room. The two Jacks in close conversation. Daniel could see no hostility between them now. The Jack he knew was just nodding every now and then while the other O'Neill talked. Jack still looked a little pale, like someone had slapped him hard before showing him a lot of photographs of a particularly grisly traffic accident And he'd put his sunglasses on, despite the fact they were indoors, and were 'gating to an indoor chamber from which they would be 'gating home. The sunglasses being worn indoors was always a bad sign.
The other O'Neill seemed to be explaining something. Teal'c and Teal'c were standing near each other in respectful silence. The two Carters were talking incredibly fast and Daniel wondered if they would have to tow Sam gently up the ramp to drag her away from this clearly fascinating conversation about extra-dimensional astrophysics.
"Poor Sam," the other Daniel said beside him. "The only person who can follow her thought process at the same kind of speed and it's theoretical astrophysics which won't let them be in the same space together for any length of time. When you're a theoretical astrophysicist that has to really hurt."
"Nice for our Teal'c to find there are other Teal'cs who've left the service of Apophis," Daniel offered.
"Is your Jack going to be okay? He looks a bit peaky?"
Damn, Daniel thought, trust another Daniel to notice how even a Jack from a different dimension was less than happy. "Maybe it's the entropic cascade failure thing?" he offered.
The other Daniel looked concerned at once. "Jack?" he called across. As the other O'Neill turned to look at him, he pointed at his watch.
The other O'Neill nodded. "Daniel's right. You should be going before you start feeling ill."
Before Jack could protest his perfect health, Daniel said quietly, "You don't look so good, Jack. And it might hit you first because you're the oldest."
"Teal'c's older than I am."
"But he's got a symbiote. It might not even affect him."
The other Daniel blinked in surprise. "I didn't know Teal'c was older than you, Jack."
The other O'Neill said, "What? You didn't know that? The guy is like…ninety or something. Why do you think he shaves his head? It's nothing to do with being a Jaffa tradition, you know, it's just to hide the grey hair."
"That reminds me," the other Daniel turned to his counterpart. "Talking of old Jaffa – has Bra'tac ever said word one to you?"
"He told me could snap me like kindling once. I think that was about it. He usually just ignores me."
"See?" the other O'Neill put in. "I told you it was nothing to do with me and you."
"Great, he despises me in every dimension, that's really comforting."
"Just think how much more impressed he's going to be when he finally realizes the truth about what a great little warrior you really are."
Jack drew Daniel a little to one side and murmured, "If I ever start saying stuff like that to you, shoot me, will you?"
"Gladly," Daniel assured him. "In fact if you ever so much as think about calling me a 'great little warrior' I will definitely shoot you, without needing any prompting."
Daniel tentatively shook hands with himself. He could see how his other self was overflowing with compassion for him; seeing Daniel as someone trapped in his loveless world with no Sha're and a Jack whom the other Daniel clearly considered inferior to his own. There wasn't enough time to explain the truth and even if he did there was no guaranteeing the other Daniel would understand what he was telling him. Deciding that being pitied was just something he was going to have to put up with, Daniel gave the other a fond smile of farewell and then turned and headed up the ramp. He was aware of Jack at his elbow, the way Jack was always at his elbow.
He said quietly, "You okay, Jack?"
There was a pause before the other man said, "Are you talking about that cascade…?"
"No."
"Then I'll tell you later." Jack paused and looked over his shoulder. "Come on, Carter. The second you get home you can work out how to e-mail through alternative dimensions, right now we need to get back to our own universe."
The two Carters embraced in farewell and then she was hurrying up the ramp after them, Teal'c striding along behind her.
Just before he stepped through the wormhole, Daniel paused and looked back. The other O'Neill had his arm around the other Daniel's shoulders and the other Daniel was looking after him anxiously.
Jack said quietly, "Don't look back."
"I'm not Eurydice, Jack," Daniel protested. "Or Lot's wife."
"Okay, I have no idea what you're talking about now."
"What were you talking about?" Daniel demanded. As Jack stepped through the wormhole, he stepped after him, hardly noticing the now familiar sensation of being poured down a funnel and dissolving into light before being jammed back together and hurled through the 'gate the other end. As Daniel staggered on landing, Jack's hand was on his elbow, holding him up. "What were you talking about?" Daniel repeated.
Jack gave him a sideways look. "Well, it's Friday night so I figured the second our backs were turned those two would be excavating each other's tonsils, and there's no way either you or I want to be seeing that."
"I thought what you liked doing on a Friday night was watching hockey?"
"Not when I was married, Daniel. Which they kind of…are."
Daniel shrugged. "Yeah well, you're right. Apparently the other me likes hockey about as much as I do, so he tends to try and keep the other Jack's mind on…other things come Friday night."
"I bet the other O'Neill lets him think he needs to be tempted away from the TV as well. That's what I always used to do with Sara."
Daniel darted him a quick sideways glance. "You mean…?"
Jack gave him a pitying look. "Daniel, believe me, no one likes hockey that much." He stepped back as Carter and Teal'c came through the wormhole, Carter talking animatedly about something astrophysical while Teal'c nodded gravely.
As Carter pulled up level with them and opened her mouth to speak, Jack said, "Carter, you do remember which Jack O'Neill you're talking to right now, don't you?"
She looked puzzled. "Sir?"
"I mean you do remember that I don't know zip about any of the stuff you just said to Teal'c and, what's more, I don't want to."
"Well according to the other me, sir, the other you is just the same."
"Oh, really? Mr Perfect has a flaw?"
"Not really a flaw, Colonel. I think both Major Carter and myself just think of it as an endearing eccentricity."
Jack gave her a narrow look. "You are so close to being pushed into the next puddle we come across, Major."
" 'Laid back'," Daniel murmured. " 'Good tempered'."
Jack frowned, "What?"
"Nothing," Daniel said at once.
Jack gave him a suspicious glare and then walked over to where the mirror was sitting on its plinth, shimmering quietly, the others following him. Jack looked at the mirror without liking. "And they're going to come and pick this thing up, right?"
"In an hour, sir."
"Because anyone could wander into our dimension right now."
Daniel prompted gently, "Including us, Jack."
"Oh right." Jack looked around at his team-members to see if they were ready. "Okay?" As everyone nodded, he counted to three and then they all reached out and touched the mirror.
***
Daniel tapped tentatively on Jack's office door. It was Monday morning. There was no mission scheduled for another three days so he and Sam could input the data they'd learned from those conferences with their other selves. But it was what Jack had carried away with him from the alternative dimension which was worrying him right now. The man had taken off as soon as they got back to the SGC and his machine had been fielding all calls throughout the weekend. Daniel had thought about going around to Jack's place but had decided against it. He didn't know himself if it was because of the thought in the back of both their minds of what that other Jack and Daniel would be doing over at the other Jack's place in the alternative universe, but he thought it had a lot more to do with not wanting to invade his best friend's personal space than it did that…other stuff. He'd left three messages on Jack's answer phone and the man hadn't called him back which had seemed like a pretty clear indication that any thinking Jack wanted to do, he needed to do by himself.
"Jack?" Daniel tapped again, still gently. "Are you in there?"
"Come in, Daniel."
Jack sounded both weary and resigned and Daniel's heart sank a little, but he opened the door and went inside. "Just wondered how you were?"
"Fine. You?"
"Fine."
Daniel tentatively sank onto a chair and looked across at Jack. The man was sitting at his desk shuffling papers about. He could be writing reports, of course, but he looked more like someone who was just pretending to be writing reports to give himself something to do with his hands.
"So," Daniel cleared his throat. "Friday was pretty weird, wasn't it?"
"Pretty much, if only because I like to think of myself as unique, then suddenly I find Jack O'Neill's are a dime a dozen. And I'm not even the deluxe version."
Daniel darted him a quick look. "Meaning what?"
"What?"
"What do you mean you're not even the deluxe version?"
Jack shrugged. "You know."
"No, Jack, I don't know. I've met three Jack O'Neill's from three different universes now and I know damned well which one I like best."
There was a long pause before Jack said: "I let them put you in a padded cell."
"Jack, you and I aren't sleeping together."
Jack looked around pointedly. "Daniel, are you talking to the wastepaper basket or something? Because I think you and I both know that, don't we? Or is there a really wild party I don't remember which has left some kind of doubt in our minds?"
"I'm just pointing out that our relationship is not the same as theirs. The Jack O'Neill in that dimension is the Daniel Jackson in that dimension's next of kin. He's his…life-partner. That gives him the right to kick up a stink when they try and stick the guy he's sleeping with in a padded cell. They had to consult him. Did anyone consult you? Did anyone say 'Here's where you sign to pack Daniel off to a padded cell?'"
"No, but I could have…"
"You could have what, Jack? You could have been there when I woke up? You could have asked to hear my version of events? You could have told anyone who would listen it was just stress? You could have kept me company to try and stop me going loco and called for medical help when I did? You could have come and visited me when I was in the padded cell and tried to get me to tell you when and how it had started so you could maybe think of what had caused it? You could have come and got me the second Doctor Mackenzie said I might be cured? Given the fact you and I are not 'doin' it' and you therefore had no power and no authority over what Janet and Mackenzie decided to do with my medical treatment, what else could you have done that you didn't do?"
"I could have told Mackenzie to stick his stupid medical orders where the sun doesn't shine, told Teal'c to pick you up and carried you the hell out of that place. I stood there while they held you down and stuck you full of drugs, Daniel. I just stood there and watched them do it."
"I stood there and watched Hathor put a Goa'uld in you, Jack. I'm not exactly proud of that myself but I can live with it because you don't blame me. But where in our friendship contract does it say we always have to be right? That we always have to do the right thing? That we're never allowed to screw up? I've got it wrong just as often as you have."
Jack ran a hand through his hair. "Daniel, Mr Perfect over there never got it wrong. He made the right decision every time when I made the wrong one. We both know that."
"I don't know that."
"Then you weren't listening."
"You know those two may have the perfect romance going over there but they don't have what we have."
"Meaning?"
"See, I know that you have always been the best possible friend to me, that you could be, Jack. Because when I disobeyed your orders and went through the mirror and damned near got myself killed, I remember the look on your face when I came back. At the time I was so full of what I'd seen I didn't think about it that much. But I've remembered that look a lot since. And all you were was glad I was alive. And I remember the same look on your face when I came around in the infirmary and started telling you we had to go through the Stargate and save the world. And there are all those other things about you that other Daniel doesn't know."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "Um, Danny – Daniel, I really don't think you and I know each other better than those two do."
"Don't you?" Daniel returned his gaze levelly.
"No, to be honest, I definitely think they have the jump on us there."
"Well as the other Daniel's Mr Perfect never makes any mistakes, the other Daniel doesn't know how much it would tear the Jack he knows up inside to have to leave him to die. He doesn't know how he'd be so happy to see him alive again that he'd hug him in front of a whole bunch of macho marines. He doesn't know that even if he lost all humanity and decency and self-respect and betrayed their friendship and tried to kill the Jack he knows, the guy would still forgive him, in an eye-blink, completely and absolutely and never utter a word of reproach afterwards even though, God knows, he deserved to get his head chewed off for acting like such a total jerk. And he doesn't know that the Jack he knows would leave a dying friend's bedside to drive all across the city with his foot to the floor to come and get him out of a padded cell even though the Jack he knows didn't think the theory that Daniel was spouting made any more sense than the total crap he'd been talking when he was hallucinating." Daniel met Jack's gaze then. "And what he especially doesn't know is that the guy would do all that for him only because he cared about him, and was his friend, and for no other reason. And he's never going to know that, because they are sleeping together which makes everything they do for each other something they're doing for themselves as well. And I think that Daniel missed out on a hell of a lot, because those 'mistakes' you made, Jack, they add up to some of my best memories."
"And your worst memories, Daniel," Jack protested quietly. "Knowing what it's like to be left alone to bleed to death on a ship that's about to blow up is not a good memory."
"Coming back to that welcome is a very good memory though."
"Getting addicted to the damned sarcophagus and going through all the pains of hell is not a good memory."
"You being there for me when the world collapsed around my ears is one of the best memories I have, Jack."
"The padded cell?"
"You got me out."
"You got yourself out."
"But you came back for me."
Jack ran a hand through his hair. "I wouldn't have had to come back for you if I hadn't left you there in the first place."
"All I know is I wouldn't change the Jack O'Neill I know for anyone and I'm very proud to call him my friend."
Jack had to stare fixedly at the papers in front of him for a moment as they became disconcertingly blurry. He hastily wiped his eyes and looked up in time to see Daniel blinking quickly, those blue eyes suspiciously bright as well. Jack swallowed hard then said gruffly, "Damnit, Daniel, now we're being as sappy as they were."
Daniel quickly scrubbed at his eyes with his sleeve. "Rubbish. We could never be as sappy as those two."
Jack wiped a stray droplet from his jaw before saying conversationally, "You know it's no wonder that other me is so damned 'laid back and good-natured' – he's got a sex life."
"Good point. Unlike you and me who haven't been getting any in…"
"Way way too long."
Daniel sat up straight. "Incidentally, did the other Jack tell you how they knew they were…you know? And is it just me or was that a really dull story?"
"Tell me about it. Four hours chewing over how they felt about each other. I mean what the hell was that about? If someone I had the hots for turned up on my doorstep at three in the morning with only an overcoat on over his jammies and told me we needed to talk I'd be able to work out I'd just got lucky without needing to bend the guy's ear until dawn."
"I know! I figured all the other me needed to do was ring the damned doorbell then throw his arms around the guy's neck and kiss him. What does that take? Thirty seconds? But that other me was definitely none too quick on the uptake."
"Really?" Jack turned and looked at him curiously.
"I think the other you has him right where he wants him. It's obvious that every time the other me starts talking about archaeology the other Jack just drags him off to the bedroom to shut him up."
Jack sat up straight and slapped his hand on the desk. "See! Something, I have never done, however boring you were being."
"Exactly!" Daniel frowned. "What?"
"I meant to say – however far over my head the conversation got."
Daniel looked slightly mollified. "Right. And that other Daniel seemed a bit kind of…passive to me."
"Oh, definitely. Very passive. You could see he'd just wait around on missions for the other me to do all his thinking for him – no initiative. I don't think they had what anyone could call a really equal relationship."
"I thought that too. And the other Daniel told me they never argued about anything, well that isn't normal, is it? People need to have disagreements sometimes, it tests their boundaries."
Jack nodded. "You know who I think that Daniel was – that was the Stepford version of you."
"Yes!" Daniel got up and went over to where the coffee jug was. "Exactly. And he had that other Jack up on such a pedestal I'm amazed the poor guy didn't have vertigo."
"And let's face it, we're talking about a pretty big age difference. When that Daniel's forty that other me is going to be…what? Fifty? Fifty one? With those knees? The other you's still going to be wanting to make Friday nights special when the other me really does just want to watch the hockey game."
"And I think they have a fundamental…" Daniel broke off and frowned into the empty coffee jug in his hand. "Damnit, Jack, you never have any coffee."
"There was enough for one mug. I didn't know I was going to be having visitors."
"What, it was too much trouble to walk all the way over to the sink and turn the tap on?" Daniel matched the action to the words as he said them.
"Daniel, why don't you just get Janet to give you a caffeine drip and be done with it?"
"All I wanted was one cup of coffee." Daniel turned the tap off with a jerk of the wrist and carried the jug back over to the hot plate.
Jack heaved a long-suffering sigh and gave him a sideways look. "Okay, so I was wrong about how and why those two got together. What was your theory anyway?"
Daniel shrugged and went and sat back down as the coffee began to drip through the filter. "I figured it was the other Daniel's idea."
"Why?"
"I thought he was probably just trying to stop the other you telling him about the rules of hockey for the hundred and fiftieth time and was willing to try anything to distract him."
Jack darted him a glance in time to see one of those maddening little smiles playing around Daniel's lips. He said pleasantly, "How about the next time we meet up with Bra'tac I tell him what a 'great little warrior' you are?"
Daniel said equally pleasantly, "How about I kill you right now, bury your lifeless body under the Stargate, and tell General Hammond you've retired to Florida?"
Jack grinned and sat back down. "Now I bet that other me never gets any snappy comebacks from the Daniel in his dimension. See, me – I'd miss that."
Daniel bowed his head to hide another smile. "Jack, are you telling me that you wouldn't swap me for a Daniel Jackson who always obeys orders, never argues, and thinks the sun shines out of…the back of your head?"
"Actually I think that could get very old very quickly. As would I if I had some hot young geek wanting me to tie him to the damned bedposts every five minutes and lather him in whipped cream. So, no, Daniel, even though you do argue constantly, seem to have no grasp of following orders whatsoever, and have never shown any signs of wanting to afford me the hero-worship I deserve I will still choose you over Stepford Daniel Through The Looking Glass every time."
"Gee thanks, Jack." Daniel went and picked up the coffee jug, pouring himself a mug before automatically refilling Jack's cup. As he sat back down, he held up his coffee in a mock-toast. "Here's to us – two screw-ups together."
Jack leaned across and clinked his mug very gently against Daniel's. "To friendship," he said.
"To friendship," Daniel echoed quietly.
They drank their coffee together in companionable silence.