Chapter Text
“Hmm… Ughhh… I just– Fuck, I don’t get it!” Annabelle Sylphide cries at her desk, grasping her hair in frustration. She’s been awake, just sitting there in her room for hours. Her circadian rhythm begs for rest, but constant feeble attempts by her brain to process a wealth of new information acts as the fuel that keeps her heart racing.
Just a few hours earlier, she had been at the Ito residence with Chiko, a fellow KKIA enthusiast and definitively the most positive and inspiring girl Anna has ever met. The two had spent a really nice time together watching anime and making parfaits (Chi being the more impressive baker of the two by a mile). Right when they’d finished up, Simon – Chi’s brother and Anna’s boyfriend – came home from his shift at a local bar to greet them. It was a strange greeting, they were both close enough to the boy that they could tell immediately. While everyone discussed their days, Simon was ineffectively trying to hide his concern. Eventually it became too much to bear, and Anna finally asked what was bothering him.
They should speak in his room, he said, though with a reluctant demeanor like he wasn’t sure he was allowed to. Normally this would be perfect material for Chi to tease the two over, but she understood long beforehand that this wasn’t the time. Simon swiftly proved her right when they got upstairs, hurriedly closing his bedroom door and immediately turning around, visibly on edge. “Anna, uhh… I just learned something important at work today. I… I think you should know.”
It was quite out of character for Simon to tell the truth this sincerely right out of the gate, to say he could be trusted to keep a secret was an understatement. It wasn’t like Anna wasn’t glad he was telling her: If she’s honest with herself, this amount of trust and openness from Simon? It actually meant a lot. That said, whatever it was about this news that had to be shared so urgently certainly didn’t quell the developing tightness in her stomach.
“Wh-What’s up? You can tell me anything Simon, you know that, right?” She responded.
“Yeah, I know.” He took in a breath, and finally, the build-up ended.
The gist of the story was… Felicia is likely long dead. That is, the true Felicia Arison died in a car crash eight years ago, and for whatever reason that Anna thinks can’t have been grief or love, Arison Corporation wanted her back to life. So, they kidnapped a girl named ‘Lilian’. Lilian, who was the best friend and sister to Mayuka, Simon’s coworker. Lilian, whose identity they tried to wipe. Lilian, whose body now holds their friend’s… who now holds Felicia Arison’s mind.
Then there’s Feli. Feli, who might be complicit in kidnappings of innocent people and, Feli, who might be completely under the control of Arison Corporation and, and… Feli… It’s all just too much, isn’t it?
No, it’s not. Anna is perfectly able to comprehend it. She is not, by any means, stupid. She has a logical brain and she knows how to use it when she wants to. Maybe this simply isn’t one of those times. Perhaps to wrap her head around it is to accept what’s going on, to accept that she didn’t clock what was happening sooner, and most of all, to accept how much it hurts to think that Feli might have been betraying her.
But it’s not Felicia’s fault either, right? She didn’t choose all this. That’s right, it’s all that damn Arison Corporation’s fault. They stole Lilian! They stole Anna’s dad! Then Felicia wasn’t even stolen, because she never even had a chance. After all, she’s been under that company’s influence since a baby.
It hurts to think about now, of course it does. They haven’t even known her for very long, but she easily made her way into Anna and Simon’s hearts. Surely Chiko would’ve loved her too, had they met.
Maybe… This hurt can be something positive. Maybe nobody’s fate is sealed. Maybe if Anna can just talk to Felicia a bit, she can get through to her. She can get through to Lilian too, like how Simon did. That’s it, since Simon did it before, that means it’s possible again!
Anna did not get much rest that night.
Felicia Arison wakes up in her standard bed in her standard room. Standard not by other teenagers’ standards, she guesses, for the lavishness of it all would likely supersede anything else about it to their eyes. But she knows intimately how perfectly soulless and devoid of personality it is, just as everything from her crib to her death bed will be.
She’s used to the drill by now, too. Eat a perfectly healthy breakfast, walk to school, do perfect work in every class, then start whatever task her father deems most important for her to do today. It’s strange, for a man who so rarely sees her, one might say he has too many opinions about what she does every day. But to wish he’d ever acknowledge that she’s more than capable of handling her responsibilities as an Arison on her own would be a futile waste of thought.
The last few weeks have had a new step added to the usual routine. Her whole life, Felicia’s simply gone to school for basic education and to be a walking promotion of the Arison Corporation’s flawlessness. To interact with the other students more than necessary would be a distraction, simple as. This rule she spent so long abiding by seemed to need updating however, when her father instructed her to ‘befriend’ two classmates by any means necessary.
The targets? Simon Ito, male, 17, and Annabelle Sylphide, female, 17.
They’re regular teenagers, by all means. Why they’re targets in the first place is a simple matter of being caught in the crossfire. Really, it’s not their fault, it’s all about convenience. That’s what Felicia thinks anyway, what she can gather from the sparse info she’s been given.
Convenient was indeed an apt description of how her mission began. Felicia became a pleasant and friendly person, someone who was out of touch, but forward in all the right ways to attract endearment. Within a week, she got them fooled well enough to receive a nickname from the two. Trained in acting since before she could crack a single genuine smile, being “Feli” came as naturally as breathing. Everything about the task was simple for someone as well-trained as Felicia Arison. That is, every variable within her control.
“Lilian” should be gone, erased from this vessel’s mind for good. Felicia knows exactly the processes they used on her, she’s seen the footage and records countless times and can never pinpoint a single mistake, not a trace of the girl’s identity should be left behind. Yet somehow, despite years of radio silence up until the mission began, her mind’s ear has slowly been infected with one familiar voice.
We’re seeing Anna and Simon today, yay!
Ignore her.
Come on Feli, I know you like them too~
Ignore her.
Especially Anna, right?
Ignore her.
You can’t act all cold and distant like this forever…
Just focus on walking.
So she did. Felicia has ignored every single word out of that thing from the start, and she doesn’t plan to stop soon. She can only stick to her standard, unchanging, perfect routine to keep any peace of mind.
Oh don’t act like you actually enjoy being Arison’s little doll, you clearly have way more fun as Feli than Felicia Arison!
Lilian’s insistence on pestering Felicia about how there’s something wrong with what she does every day is… frustrating, if nothing else. She goes on and on about how Felicia’s not perfectly in control of her own life or how she doesn’t truly want this. She does. If she didn’t want this, if she wanted to be a regular teenager, she’d be no different than the targets, no different than Lilian. She is not like them.
Felicia’s reassurances to herself end when she walks into the classroom.
“Hello Simon, Anna,” Feli says with her friendly tone and perfectly formed smile, “I hope you two are well today.” In front of her, she’s met with the two variables that she was so sure were independent when the mission started. She’s come to know better however, that Lilian’s mere presence makes it a risk to continue growing close with them, the central idea of the mission.
“Hey Feli!” Annabelle responds with a wave. From an external perspective, her joy is indistinguishable from Feli’s. This girl, she’s certain, is perfectly safe to interact with. Felicia knows she has connections to Arison Co. from the business party, but she lacks any influence even within her own family. Plus, Lilian doesn’t seem to care about her as much as she does the boy.
“Hi Felicia, how are you?” asks Simon from the seat next to Annabelle. Now this is the dangerous one. Somehow, he managed to bring Lilian to the forefront of their mind on the night of the festival, something that admittedly had Felicia shaken. Plus, she's done her research. She knows he works with someone who was very close with Lilian, a fact Lilian herself is luckily still in the dark about. It’s the one blessing about this predicament Felicia can count, that Lilian seems to remember very little about her past life: just names and emotions.
“I’m doing well, thank you for asking. How about you two?”
So, the day starts.
Any means necessary. That’s what Anna has pledged, to ‘reach’ Feli and Lilian no matter what it takes. The troubling part is figuring out exactly what ‘reaching’ them actually means and exactly how to achieve it. In other words… The hard part is all of it. Someone who enjoys logic puzzles of all sorts though, she quickly gets to work on a solution. She decides that relying only on studying, time in school, and the occasional café adventure is impractical. She must think outside the box to find the most straightforward possible answer that’s still worth exploring.
“Sooooo~, what do you think of staying over to watch Kira Komachi with us tonight Feli?” Anna asks, grinning at the girl next to her while walking home from school on a Friday evening.
She pitched the idea to Simon first, who agreed it would be a good way to earn Feli’s trust in a group situation where she wouldn’t be able to try any funny business even if she wanted to. Plus, Anna secretly hopes that Chiko and Kira Komachi’s similar infectious ambition will leave an impression on Feli. …Or Lilian. Or both? She’s still unsure how it actually works and how much of the two exist inside that brain, that’s something else she hopes to learn about.
‘Feli’ casually hums with a finger to her lip in thought, “Why not,” she responds with a giggle, “it couldn’t hurt, right?” Without a second to prepare after answering, she suddenly feels a warm embrace and has to turn her heel to stay balanced as she’s tackled by Anna into a hug.
“Yay! Oh, we are going to have so much fun. You even get to meet Chiko, you’re gonna love her, I promise.”
“Oh don’t worry, I believe you. She sounds most pleasant from what you two have told me.”
“Mhm. Plus it’ll be nice to spend some more time with you in a more, hmm, informal scenario y’know?”
“I don’t believe I understand. Have our interactions been too ‘formal’ up to now?” Feli cocks her head.
“No, no. It’s just,” Anna takes a pause to think, “it’s harder to really get to know someone while you’re at school. Like, there’s only so much time in the day, it’s such a strict environment, and most of the conversations just revolve around classes. We– No, I wanna get to know you, Feli. The real you. I still don’t really know what kind of person you are when you let loose and all…”
Feli seems quite taken aback by this response. “Ah, I see. Are you sure?”
“Uh, yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Anna responds as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
Feli laughs nervously. “Well, I think you just might be disappointed… I don’t believe I’m much different when I ‘let loose’.”
“Now I know that’s not true, you were clearly a lot less uptight than normal at the festival, right?”
“I-I was? My sincerest apologies for usually being so uptight in that case.”
Anna lets out a genuine laugh. “Whaaat? You don’t need to apologise for that! It’s one of your most endearing traits, honest.” She looks down at the ground, slightly embarrassed. “Look, I just… I want you to feel like you can be yourself around us, alright? We’re your friends now, there’s no going back!”
The way the golden sunset shimmer reflects off her eyes right now, the gentle floral perfume she wears, the way her tone of voice which normally seems so well-controlled wavers just a little bit when Anna’s questions catch her off-guard. Once she starts noticing, she can’t stop. For the first time in this conversation, it all makes the information Simon shared with her come to the forefront of her mind. It fails to bring about a sense of loss or betrayal, however. Instead she asks herself, is this really a girl who would let child abductions happen? She’s starting to doubt it, to consider that there’s something more behind those violet eyes. Just because she’s the CEO’s daughter doesn’t mean she can’t have been left in the dark about the company’s activities all these years. After all, it’s not like her own father tells her any more official company business than exactly what he can use her for.
Anna knows this isn’t something she can entertain if she wants to be safe with such a potentially dangerous group involved. But whether it’s Felicia, Lilian, or both, she just can’t help being honest with herself about how much she wants to keep growing closer to them with everyone else. Maybe… Maybe they were too quick to form ulterior motives and secret plans after all.
Hours pass and Feli finds herself remarkably warmed by Annabelle’s body next to her on an otherwise chilly night. Both are currently sat on a couch in the Ito residence and surrounded by the faint outlines of a passed out Simon, Chiko, and Kiki, the latter two cuddling together. The cool glow of KKIA paused on the television reluctantly works together with the lamp’s soft, orange light beside the couch to act as the only two things keeping total darkness at bay. The remnants of Chiko’s slightly greasy cooking that still linger in the air have mixed with Feli’s mostly faded perfume, creating a quiet sensory clash. By now, it’s been about 15 hours since she became ‘Feli’, with almost no break in between. Whether she feels any weary after so long of putting up this front is something she doesn’t think about.
“Hey hey, I think everyone’s fully asleep now!”
Feli laughs, “They have been for a while now, Anna.”
“Well yeah, but not deep sleep. If I were to pull up Simon’s eyelids right this moment, I bet you could see the creepy old things under it ‘rapidly moving’!”
“I suppose you’re right. Though pray tell, why is that important in the first place?”
“We get to gossip now, duh!” Perhaps that initial description was wrong. The warm glow emanating from Anna’s grin acts as a third source of light within the sitting room.
Feli lets out a breathy gasp that she almost worries will wake someone up, “Gossip? I don’t want to talk bad about anyone!”
Anna waves her hand dismissively. “Nonono, it’s nothing like that! Just, you know, girl talk!”
“Well I– …I don’t actually know what girl talk is like.”
This gives Anna pause for a long moment, before she suddenly lights up again. “Then we’ll just have to change that! Hmm, let’s see… Oh, you didn’t hear how the festival concert went down, did you?”
Feli already knows how everything happened of course, but why not entertain her? “Well Simon did tell me some, but what did you think?”
Anna doesn’t give her a moment to question why the words out of her mouth didn’t quite match what she meant to speak. Those jade green eyes sparkle with a beautiful passion as she practically yells “It was–!” They grow wide in embarrassment now, hearing just how loud her voice is for the circumstance. She corrects it to a whisper-shout as she continues. “It was absolutely incredible! Oh man, Chiko and everyone shone out there! I was absolutely bawling by the end, especially with the original song she wrote about Simon,” she emphasises. “Insane work. Thank god too, right before it all happened Simon finally decided to tell her about his job. Oh right, he never told you either, I forgot. Simon works part time to pay for her club, but he kept it a secret from her for a whole year.”
Feli leans forward to react, “Wow, really? That’s quite incredible of him, I didn’t even know.” She did, of course. She just… felt like saying that.
“Right? Him and Chiko are both… they’re just incredible, there’s no other way I can say it.” She stops talking for a moment, caught up in the moment. Her smile may not be as wide while she’s thinking, but the glow her cheerful energy gives off hasn’t faded one bit. The room doesn’t feel dark, but instead as if they’re the only two people lit up in an otherwise pitch black world at this moment. Anna speaks low now, no longer whispering, “So are you, Feli. Of course your performance at the business party was breathtaking too, but I don’t like you because you’re ‘perfect’ or whatever they make you feel like you have to be. I’m really glad you joined us tonight, you’ve been so nice to have around.” She looks directly into Feli’s eyes and smiles, “Thank you for being my friend.”
Felicia’s guts twist. This feeling calls to mind memories of watching behind quadruple glazed glass as fully conscious AMI patients are disemboweled. What is this? Nothing good, surely. She’s spent years building up and priding herself on her identity. What a businesswoman – and what a good actress needs is not just a shell of solid iron, but a core that’s attuned to both hard blows and gentle touches, that won’t buckle in a fistfight or under appeals to sympathy.
Yet, right now, it feels as if something has somehow buried its way deep past her shell and into the centre of her core without so much as a peep. What lies there, even she doesn’t know. It’s a black hole, a gap in knowledge she didn’t know existed, it’s not her at all.
…That’s it, this can’t be her! She’s felt a similar way once before, and although it’s different this time, she knew back then too that it really wasn’t her who could ever be so weak. That means the same as last time, that this is someone else entirely after all. Someone else is…
“Thank you too, Anna!”
Lilian clasps the girl’s hands in hers, wearing a smile so wide it stresses muscles that haven’t seen use in years. It’s like a piece of long forgotten machinery, forced back to life years after it’s gathered all sorts of rust and decay. “Thank you for being such a good friend, it means so much.”
Anna is speechless. “Y- uhh, yeah! No problem dude.” she responds in a stupor. Holy shit, it’s actually happening now, she thinks. What should she give away? How much is okay to let Lilian know? Is it okay to lie to someone she’s so close with? But even then, is this the person she’s so close with after all?
She knows these are questions she should’ve been asking herself long before this moment, but suddenly they all rise to the surface and beg for attention. However, the cacophony in her mind doesn’t pull her attention away from what’s in front of her, Lili’s presence far too reminiscent of a car accident for Anna to look away.
“Yay, I love you Anna!” she exclaims without hesitation, tackling her target down into the couch, then pushing up on Anna’s shoulders to lean over her. Anna is at a complete loss for words, much less actions. The waves of ebony locks falling by the sides of her head and the face staring intently down at her are stark reminders of two truths at once. They are Feli’s physical features indeed, that can’t be denied. But that’s unmistakably not who’s above her.
“P-please let me go.” is all she can get out.
“Hmm,” Lili pouts, “Only if you tell me something.” Anna raises an eyebrow. “Did… he tell you about me?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, I’m sorry, F-Feli.”
Lili sighs and looks down in disappointment. “You know that’s not my name. I thought friends weren’t supposed to lie to each other… Are we not friends, Anna?”
“What? No, I–”
“I knew it! I knew we were! So you have to be honest then, Simon told you exactly who I am, didn't he?”
Anna looks away, into the dark of the room. “...You're Lilian.”
“Yes, you got it!” Lili’s eyes light up, an indecipherable emotion behind them. So similar to Feli, yet so different.
“Hey, I promise it's okay,” Anna reassures, “I don't have anything against you, and I wouldn't tell anyone else okay? So just please let me go and I'll stay here with you to talk it out.”
“Fine, fine. You promise?”
“Yeah, I promise you.” She nods, looking directly into Lilian’s eyes this time.
“Woah… Anna, you’re really pretty,” Lili says, only breaking eye contact for a moment to climb off Anna and hoist her back up. “Feli might not say it, but I know for a fact she finds you stunning too.”
“Oh, wow, you really think so?” Anna laughs bashfully “Well, you’re one to talk!” So strange, she can’t help but think, it’s like a repeat of that conversation with Feli back at the café all that time ago, only Lili doesn’t seem to have the same sense of déjà vu at all. Come to think of it, just a month ago Lili didn’t even seem to be cognizant of the present, so why does she know exactly who Anna and Feli are now?
She has to get more information. “Lili, how–” she starts, before getting cut off all of a sudden.
“Oh, you used my nickname! Wow, that really brings back memories…” her sentence drifts off, mouth left ajar as though she’s completely lost in her own mind. The silence is eventually broken with sudden movement that makes Anna jolt.
“Annabelle, tell me now,” Lilian demands, a flash of danger in her expression like a sort of warning, “Do you know anything about Yuyu – my sis, Mayuka?”
Fuck, man. This is all far too much for her to process at once, and even more than that Lilian’s unpredictability makes it a nightmare to keep up in the first place.
“Awuhhh, I mean–”
Lili covers her mouth with a shrill gasp. “You… You do, oh my god.”
“Wait no, I didn’t say–” But she’s loudly shushed, never allowed to get a sentence in around Lilian. Lilian, whose breath has now quickened in panic.
“Anna, tell me everything you know about her, now.” Lili holds her in place once more, against the back of the couch this time. Tears and desperation start to take shape, “Please, I’m begging you, Anna! Quickly!”
But all Anna can let out is a whispered shout, “Hey, let go of me Lili!” In accordance with that cry, the absence of any pressure on her shoulders makes itself known.
Looking up, she sees Lili… or maybe it’s not Lili. There’s a dark haired teenager standing up straight in the cold, dark room. She’s barely highlighted by the low, icy light behind her. The girl bows politely and speaks in a deeper, businesslike voice Anna hasn’t heard for a long time. “My apologies for the trouble. I’ll be taking my leave now.”
“F-Feli?” Anna calls out weakly as the girl glides elegantly towards the door, her own body remaining paralysed as though still pinned down by grips of warm flesh.
The girl stops right before she reaches towards the door handle. Without turning around, she says with a barely audible crack, “Goodbye, Annabelle.”