Chapter Text
Aegon needed to ask his wife this question now, before she was in her sensitive months. For now the swell of her waist was slight and besides her mild nausea, she was still her bubbly self.
He couldn't let more months pass him by. Because by then, she'd be further along in the pregnancy and such a question could cause her grievous stress. If he was right, she may panic at the revelation of her and if he were wrong, she'd be offended and insulted. One thing for sure he would never stress her like that so late in the pregnancy. Not when stress cut his own infant sister's life before it even started.
Why exactly was he acting like he had to ask her this question before she delivered their baby? Well he didn’t exactly have an answer. Perhaps it was the start of a new chapter, a new era for their family and the realm. Perhaps he needed closure before stepping into it. But the thought gnawed at him, the way old memories always did. Honestly with this unanswered question clawing at his mind, drawing at all his senses, he felt like he was ruminating over details from the past, more than he usually did. And if there was anyone that loved to sit in the past, it was Aegon. But he'd been going over hundreds of records and paintings and asking people odd questions. People answered of course, because they wanted to make him happy. Happiness was a stretch because he was Aegon, afterall, but they wanted to at least please him in the moment. They answered with pitiable gazes, little did they know that it was the rare occurrence of Aegon stewing in his family's tragic past, not for grief's sake but for the search of answers.
Aegon loved his wife fiercely but he hated how broken he was and how he couldn't fully express the depth of feeling he had for her. She was the light in the darkness of his mind. The anchor that stopped him from drowning in his emotions. His wife treated him like he wasn't a burden. Like there actually was hope for him. In the beginning, he feared he would make her bitter like him if not by her taking up his manners, then at least from being shackled to a cold and sad ghost of a man. But he was wrong. He was very wrong. She couldn’t become embittered. She was a light — bright as a burning sun. And a burning sun, he knew, could never be extinguished.
Perhaps his eternal grief— the same grief that stuck to him the way smoke stuck to skin— was driving him mad and making his imagination run wild. Was it a fool's wish or was he actually right to suspect what he did. Aegon was obsessed with the past. So maybe he was pulling on a tether, trying to reach for dust just to make himself feel somewhat whole again. Or maybe as a near silent man always in his thoughts he had made observations and noticed one too many coincidences that couldn't be just mere coincidences anymore.
Where could he start from? From the earliest days when he just met her to the most recent times, everything felt like it was pointing to one conclusion. He couldn't write all of them down for they were a lot, but he knew the ones that were most haunting.
Last year, they celebrated their wedding anniversary with a grand ball. As the night progressed, everyone trooped to the dance floor including members of his high table. Aegon hardly danced. In fact, anything concerning celebrations wasn't his thing. He gave exceptions to his beloved sisters and his sweet lady wife. He would endure a couple stiff steps just to make them happy.
But even festivities could not put a stop to his kingly duties. His brother, Viserys called him outside to discuss matters regarding trade with Dorne. When he turned back to return to the now almost deserted High table, he saw something he probably should not have seen. Over the sea of heads on the dance floor, and over the swinging limbs in tune with the music, he saw his lady wife place her crown upon his sister's head. His sister looked surprised and immediately captured her in a tight hug. What made it all the more peculiar was that his sister's eyes started to tear up— a very rare sight indeed. He shouldn’t have seen it. He shouldn’t have looked. But he couldn’t stop. The moment was so intense, so beautiful and yet felt so heavy with the concept of many unsaid things, but what were these things? What did they mean? Why did she do that?
The crown incident was curious. But the tangerine morning— that was proof that defied coincidence.
The Royal family broke their fast as usual, though it happened to be Viserys’s name day. As expected, his brother wanted no festivities that their sister suggested — only his favorite foods served all day. Aegon forgot this at the table and reached for the plate of orange pudding. So did his wife.
They ate spoonfuls until both of them lunged for the jug of water. Aegon’s mouth burned as if he’d swallowed fire. His nose was already running. Tangerines. He’d forgotten they were Viserys’s favorite.
Viserys laughed. Aegon did not, though the sound pleased him; laughter never came easy to the young King. But then Viserys laughed harder— this time at the sight of the Queen. She too was gulping water, fanning her tongue, her eyes watering.
“A match made in heaven, are you two not?” Viserys quipped.
He always said Aegon’s reaction to tangerines was absurd. The sweetest fruit in the world, he called it. How could it taste like pepper to anyone? But now the Queen was the same. And Viserys didn’t tease her. He only smiled.
Aegon wanted to ask if he found it strange, the coincidence of it. Because only one other person in all the world had shared this reaction— and that person no longer lived in it.
The only difference was in the tears. The other person who suffered from the allergy responded just like Aegon but with tears. And here the Queen teared up from the citrus fruit. He watched the Queen dab her eyes. And it was like watching his memory replay itself from the depths of his mind. Coincidence, he told himself. It must be a coincidence.
Further on his list was the fact that people loved to look at his Queen. And Aegon couldn't blame them. The word “beautiful” was too small. She was so breathtaking that court records of the maiden day ball officially noted her as “Surpassingly Beautiful”. A term given to no one else. As time went on, countless songs had been written about her. The Queen was everything good of course, but gosh, her appearance was just too consuming that it left people either speechless, stuttering or talking endlessly and writing songs about her across the entire continent.
They called her a fitting Queen ever since the maiden's ball, scandalous talks would often say that Jaehaera was too plain looking and Aegon pitied her for she didn't make herself and she deserved to rest in peace. But with them comparing the two girls he couldn't help but think how truly nobody compared to his Queen. Was he clouded by his love? Maybe but at least from other people's comments, it was evident that she was considered the most beautiful woman in the entire known continent. They called her a Diamond of the first water in a song composed by a popular crooner and since then, the nickname diamond of the realm stuck.
Aegon couldn't help but think how the last time there was such a famed beauty in Westeros it was his own mother. Aegon wanted to think with facts so he turned to meticulous research for his theory. He sat for hours in the night, seven nights in a row, going through several types of books. He even went through the Royal inventory of gossip sheets. Truly, he was correct. The last most acclaimed beauty was the Realm's Delight.
There was only a close second, if one could call it a second. The only other beauty during his mother's lifetime was so close to being considered a tie by the public. Even she had her own name carried by songs. A nickname that his brother's grandsire later gave to his brother but some records claimed it was the beauty herself who declared her nephew the new successor of her acclaimed title. This beauty was none other than the Pearl of Driftmark, Lady Laena Velaryon, rider of Vhagar and daughter to Princess Rhaenys and Lord Corlys. Sister or aunt to his master of Ships, he didn't really care for whichever story Lord Corlys settled with. But his Admiral was not much of a looker anyway. Not in the way The Pearl of Driftmark and his brother's father was noted to be.
So days after his research he'd think about the Realms delight and the Pearl of Driftmark, famous royal best friends and cousins whose exotic looks exalted them above other women folk. So beautiful that men still drooled after them despite the dangerous, and some would say blood thirsty man they were both married too. Those three names rang in his head for days:
The Realms Delight,
The Pearl of Driftmark,
And his own Queen,
The Diamond of the Realm.
This could mean nothing, right?
Consequently, thinking about appearances made Aegon dwell on the Queen’s features. Compliments always equated her eyes to diamonds because they sparkled whenever she smiled. Her eyes bounced against the light and made her stand out. There was someone who also had glossy eyes in Aegon's life but as Valyrians, such markers are bound to happen in a tight knit race right? Though when he tried to explain away the eyes, the fact that they were paired with dimples slightly unnerved him.
As if physical pointers weren't enough, the universe pushed behavioral ones into the mix. The Queen was left-handed. That wasn't too common among nobles, especially since the faith of the Seven waxed on with their sermons about how right handedness was closer to the gods and to purity. Courtiers knew better than to hassle her about such nonsense. Regardless, she cultivated the habit where she would momentarily switch to depending on her right hand in public. Simply to keep up appearances that they gave a fuck about the faith. He told her she didn't have to do it but she insisted.
“It's a rare skill to be able to make either hand dominant,” Viserys always remarked when he saw the Queen trade hands, using the term “ambidextrous” when close friends marveled at her.”
Viserys was a well read man and Aegon always vouched for his intelligence but this fact, Aegon knew, was taught to them by the only other person they knew to be ambidextrous.
Once upon a time they would sit cross-legged and look on with immense awe as this two handed fellow wrote hundreds of reports with both hands and still produced writing as beautiful as art. Now his Queen did that same thing and he watched with similar awe. How could Viserys not be curious about it. Perhaps just another coincidence, right?
Despite it all, Aegon grappled with letting these things go. He spent days debating within himself the strength and the weakness of his theory. But something that almost pushed him off the edge, was walking in on the Queen lounging on her sofa with Ser Max, or as Viserys liked to call him, Maxwell.
When the Queen ran around shouting after her white short-legged but oddly fast dog, many would think she chased after a man or a knight because of her funny choice in name. Aegon was the one who gave her the overactive pup. He often felt bad that he couldn't meet her with the same level of cheerfulness so a furry companion came to mind. He prayed he made the right choice and he had. She loved him, sang to him and groomed him herself. Aegon noted within himself that he would take over the grooming when she became too heavy. They had servants but he's sure she'd appreciate him doing it personally even though many would say it wasn't kingly, he really could not give a fuck what they thought. But when he walked in on his Queen petting Ser Max to sleep as she sang a sea shanty, he felt the air leave his lungs and gooseflesh appear on his neck.
He shouldn't be surprised. She grew up by the sea, on a land spilling with Sailors. But this wasn't any sea shanty. It had the tune of a common shanty that Sailors sang to celebrate the sun coming out after a storm at sea.
What truly scared Aegon was the fact that she sang the familiar tune but with lyrics expressing joy over a difficult poop that finally departed an aching anus. Silly words that could only be formed by children. Aegon knew this because he knew the two children who swapped the lyrics and taught it to him to the amused displeasure of his mother.
He used to love singing that song but he hadn't in years. Neither had Viserys because it wasn't funny anymore, only painful. Yet here his Queen lay on her sofa singing it with ease. Aegon's heart raced the more he listened and he knew he had to get out of there before she discovered he heard what he did. How could it be? Why, after so many years, was he hearing this song again? And why on blasted earth was he hearing it from the Queen?
Finally, the most unsettling affirmation of his theory came not from a coincidence, but from the eyes of others. He knew his lady wife was beloved but the way certain people regarded her was different.
For instance, Lady Jeyne Arryn, his mother's cousin and one of his former regents was an iron fisted woman. The combination of her grief and years fighting off lousy male cousins made her icy to others. She suffered no fools and spoke harsher than actual army generals. But Jayne always had a soft hand when dealing with him and Viserys, even now that they were grown men. Also by extension, his sisters. But similarly, she had that softness for his Queen.
As far back as the maiden ball, she disliked all the girls vying for his hand but advocated so vehemently for his Queen. She said to the hearing of others that all the girls can dash their hopes because the true contender had arrived. Aegon was younger then but didn't look too much into it. He knew this utterance angered Unwin Peake who wanted his daughter to be chosen but Jeyne was more than ready to fight him physically for trying to talk down on her choice in future Queen. Peake himself asked “What's even in it for you? At least I'm here fighting for my daughter. What's your motivation?” All Jeyne said was that it was her duty to the realm, leaving Unwin to huff and puff out of the room.
Then Lord Corlys was more peculiar. He held on to the then little Queen as if she might disappear. The Sea Snake had always been very endeared to his Queen. He would sit and hold her hand and hold her cheek as if she were his daughter. For a while after knowing her for just a few weeks, Aegon wondered whether his Queen was his secret daughter. The fact Lord Corlys didn't ask him to legitimize her like Alyn made him throw that thought away. He told himself he was young and silly to think that. Aegon knew the Queen had a father but only entertained the wild thought because Lord Corlys was so sensitive towards her.
However, the Lord of Winterfell gave the most eerie reaction of them all. He once promised Aegon he would try to check in on him regularly. So when Cregan fulfilled his promise, it made Aegon feel like he had an older brother once again.
Cregan was a man of honour and diligence. But the moment he saw the Queen, he stopped. And stared.In fact, he stared at her for the majority of his visit.
Aegon had seen people stare at her a lot but the way his eyes were fixed on her wasn't about looks or anything superficial. He looked at her like if he looked away she might turn out to be a mirage. Cregan would turn quiet and watch the Queen with a slight sad furrow to his brow. Aegon asked Cregan what his thoughts were, and he merely shook his head with a small sad smile as if he wanted to shake something from his mind. And that was that.
This was the culmination of years of curiosity, that he naively shrugged off.
Aegon by nature ignored things, but this could no longer be one of them.