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Kyujin first noticed it during dance practice in October.
Jiwoo unnie was demonstrating the chorus moves, her hair tied up messily, sweat marking the collar of her practice shirt. Nothing special. They'd been training together for years, but when Jiwoo laughed at something their instructor said, throwing her head back, Kyujin's chest did something weird.
She ignored it. Probably just tired.
"Kyujin-ah, you coming?" Jiwoo called from the doorway after practice ended. "There's a new street food stall near the convenience store."
"Yes, unnie." Kyujin grabbed her bag quickly, maybe too quickly.
The autumn air bit at their faces as they walked. Seoul at night always felt alive, even in their quiet neighborhood near the company building. The street vendor had a small cart with sweet potatoes roasting over hot stones, steam rising into the cold air.
"Two please, ahjussi." Jiwoo said, already pulling out her wallet.
"Unnie, I can pay."
"My treat." Jiwoo smiled and handed her a warm sweet potato wrapped in paper. "You worked hard today."
Kyujin held it carefully, the heat seeping into her palms. They sat on the curb outside a closed shop. Jiwoo peeled her sweet potato, taking a big bite.
"This is so good," Jiwoo mumbled through her mouthful. "Worth every calorie our trainer will yell about tomorrow."
Kyujin laughed, peeling her own. The inside was golden and soft. She took a bite—sweet, warm, perfect. But she couldn't stop glancing at Jiwoo, who was focused on her food like it was the best thing in the world.
That's when Kyujin knew she was in trouble.
Winter came fast. Practice intensified as their debut date got closer. Kyujin started to notice Jiwoo more.
"Does Jiwoo know?" Jinsol whispered during a water break.
"There's nothing to know." Kyujin took a long drink, avoiding her unnie's look.
But there was something to know. Every day it grew bigger, harder to ignore. When Jiwoo touched her shoulder during formations, Kyujin's whole body went electric. When Jiwoo texted her goodnight, she'd read it five times before sleeping. It was stupid and hopeless and Kyujin hated it.
February brought their debut showcase. The night before, Kyujin couldn't sleep. She found Jiwoo on the practice room floor at 2 AM, running through their routine alone.
"Unnie, you should rest."
Jiwoo looked up, breathing hard. "Can't. What if I mess up tomorrow?"
"You won't." Kyujin sat beside her. "You're the best dancer here."
"You're just saying that."
"I mean it."
Jiwoo met her eyes, and for a second, Kyujin forgot how to breathe. The fluorescent lights made everything too bright, too real.
Jiwoo smiled. "Thanks, Kyujin-ah. You always know what to say."
She stood up, offering her hand to pull Kyujin up too. Their hands fit together so naturally. Kyujin held on maybe a second too long.
Debut went perfectly. But some things stayed the same—practice, exhaustion, and Kyujin's feelings that wouldn't go away no matter how hard she tried.
Schedule after schedule, performance after performance. One night after a final music show, they finally had a few days off. The group scattered, some to the dorms, some to see family.
"Want to grab food?" Jiwoo asked Kyujin. "I saw that sweet potato stall is still there."
Kyujin's heart jumped. "Yes."
They ended up at the same curb as before, eating roasted sweet potatoes under streetlights. It felt like coming home.
"Remember when we were just trainees?" Jiwoo said. "Feels like forever ago."
"Five months ago, unnie."
"Still." Jiwoo bumped their shoulders together. "I'm glad we debuted together. I don't think I could do this without you."
Kyujin's throat tightened. "Me too."
Jiwoo was looking at her phone, scrolling through their group chat. "Oh, Minjun oppa asked if I wanted to get coffee next week."
"Minjun?" Kyujin tried to keep her voice normal. "From the crew?"
"Yeah. He's nice, right?" Jiwoo was smiling at her screen. "Do you think I should go?"
Something cracked inside Kyujin's chest. "If you want to."
"I don't know. Maybe?" Jiwoo looked up. "Have you ever liked someone, Kyujin-ah? Like, really liked them?"
The question hung in the cold air. Kyujin could say it. Three words. Right now. But Jiwoo was looking at her so openly, so innocently, waiting for advice about some guy.
"No," Kyujin lied. "Not really."
"You will someday." Jiwoo finished her sweet potato and stood up, brushing off her jeans. "Come on, it's freezing. Let's go home."
Jiwoo went to coffee with Minjun. Then dinner. Then coffee again.
Kyujin watched it happen in real-time, the texts that made Jiwoo smile during practice, the phone calls she'd take in the hallway, the way she started mentioning him casually in conversation.
"You okay?" Jinsol asked after practice one day. "You've been quiet."
"I'm fine."
"Kyujin."
"I said I'm fine." She grabbed her bag and left before Jinsol could say anything else.
She walked without thinking and ended up at the sweet potato stall. The ahjussi recognized her.
"Just you today?" he asked.
"Just me."
She sat on their curb alone, the sweet potato warm in her hands but tasting like nothing. A couple walked past, holding hands and laughing. Kyujin looked away.
Her phone buzzed.
JJyu unnie: Minjun asked me to be his girlfriend!! What do I say?? 😊
Kyujin stared at the message until the screen went dark. She should be happy for her. Jiwoo deserved good things. Jiwoo deserved everything.
She typed and deleted five different responses before settling on: That's great unnie! He's lucky
The reply came fast: Thank you!! You're the best ❤️
Kyujin locked her phone and took another bite. The sweet potato had gone cold. She ate it anyway, every last bit, sitting alone under streetlights that made everything look washed out and distant.
Above her, the winter sky was cloudless and full of stars she couldn't quite see through the city lights. She wondered if this feeling would ever go away, or if she'd carry it forever.
Life would go on. Kyujin would stand beside Jiwoo like always, holding this secret close, letting it burn slow and steady like coals under roasting sweet potatoes.
She finished eating and stood up, throwing the paper away. The walk back to the dorm felt longer than usual. Inside, she could hear the others laughing about something. Jiwoo's voice rose above the rest, bright and happy.
Kyujin took a breath and opened the door, smile already fixed in place.
"Kyujin-ah! Where were you?" Jiwoo called from the couch. "We're watching that show you like."
"Just went for a walk." Kyujin sat down, leaving one seat between them. "What did I miss?"
Outside, cold pressed against the windows. Inside, Jiwoo laughed at something on screen, and Kyujin memorized the sound like she memorized everything else carefully, knowing it would never be enough and loving her anyway.
Sweet potato season would come again next year. Kyujin would probably still be in love with her then too.