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Robin Buckley does not like parties. Like, at all.
What was so appealing about loud music and making small talk amongst hordes of drunk college students, she would never know. It seemed everyone was either having the time of their lives or throwing up in a shitty bathroom, but however many people were crushed into the apartment, she never lost the sense that she was alone in her own bubble, separated from any emotion the party was meant to elicit.
She always got home feeling exhausted, as if the constant assault of light and noise were a physical burden that she had had to carry for the evening.
Needless to say, Robin was not exactly thrilled when Steve insisted she came along to this one.
She sighed, resigned to another few hours of making small talk and dodging the advances of men just drunk enough not to care about her strange fashion or obvious awkwardness. Wandering aimlessly through the crowd, she scanned the faces around her for anyone familiar who might take pity on her.
Instead, her eye caught on a girl, just visible through a part in the crowd.
She was dancing like no one was watching, belting out the words to the tune as she waved her arms above her. Her brown curls cascaded wild and carefree in all directions, whipping across her face before settling back on her shoulders.
Her dress suited the image perfectly: the delicate pinks and purples and yellows suited her soft features, but the chaotic pattern made it obvious that she was not all business. The skirt was short, just barely brushing the cap of her knee, and it rode up ever so slightly as the girl moved with the music.
Robin caught herself staring and blushed. But she couldn’t look away from the girl. It felt as if a magnet was pulling her eyes toward her, and would not let her go, no matter how hard she tried.
What was it about this girl that captivated her? She was beautiful, yes; probably the most beautiful person Robin had ever seen, if she was being honest.
That wasn’t it though. Something about the way she danced, as if she did not give one single fuck about what anyone else thought of her. As if she were dancing for herself alone. The look of pure contentment on her face lit up her blue eyes so much that Robin could see it halfway across the room.
And then those gorgeous eyes were turned on Robin. The skin around them crinkled, and she was smiling – at her. At Robin! – as if she knew.
The moment was shattered as a young man about their age came up behind the girl, tugging on her arm. Robin kicked herself. Of course she had a boyfriend.
Robin was too busy trying to hide her burning cheeks to notice the last look the girl threw back at her as she was pulled away.
A few moments later, a familiar figure sidled up beside Robin. ‘Hi, Steve,’ she muttered dejectedly.
‘What’s up?’ His easy smile at seeing her quickly hardened at her expression. ‘Those dickhead guys haven’t been picking on you again, have they? Because if they have, I’m going to–’
Robin shook her head quickly. ‘No, no, nothing like that.’ She sighed and lowered her voice. ‘It’s just that… well, there's this girl here, and she is just gorgeous, like truly, breathtakingly beautiful.’
Steve looked delighted. ‘Why didn’t you say so? Charming the ladies just happens to be my specialty, you know.’ He winked. ‘Just go up to her, say hi, talk a little. And then–ask her to dance. Boom!’ He clapped his hands, clearly very pleased with himself.
She groaned. ‘It’s a little harder for me than for you, dingus. I’m pretty sure she has a boyfriend.’
‘How do you know that?’
‘I don’t know, he just…came up behind her, and they looked like they were really close.’
‘Being ‘really close’ does not a boyfriend make.’ He gestured pointedly between them, and Robin had to admit he had a point. ‘Just go say hi to her. If you get the feeling she’s already involved or not interested, you can just say bye and come back here.’
Robin shook her head. ‘I can’t just go up to a stranger and start flirting!’
Steve took her by the shoulders. ‘Yes you can. Please, Rob? I’ll tell you what–you go say hi to her, and you can have total control of music in the apartment and car for a week.’
She considered this for a moment. ‘Fine. But only so I don’t have to hear Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! yet again.’
Steve smiled widely and spun her shoulders around to face the dance floor, giving her a not-so-gentle push. ‘Go get the girl!’
The crowd pressed in on Robin as she scurried along the outer edge, every now and then standing up on tip-toes to see over the sea of heads. She craned her neck, trying to get a better look at the dance floor where she had seen the girl earlier.
This is stupid, she thought. She’s probably gone home or something.
Robin was still scanning the crowd distractedly when she crashed into something warm and soft. Suddenly her shirt was wet and sticky with spilled drink as she instinctively clutched onto the figure she had run into, trying not to topple over. ‘I’m so, so sorry,’ she began. ‘I was looking for someone and I wasn’t watching where I was going and–’ She stopped abruptly when she finally looked up and saw the girl’s face.
It was her.
Blazing heat tingled up Robin’s neck and into her cheeks. What was that thing with holes opening in the ground? One of them would be great right about now. ‘Um,’ she squeaked. ‘I…’
The girl opened her mouth, but Robin spun around and pushed her way through the crowd, not wanting to hear whatever insults about her clumsiness the girl was bound to hurl at her. The girl’s gaze burned on her neck until the crowd closed in and she was back with Steve.
His grin dropped when he saw her face. ‘I need to go home. Now,’ she demanded.
He took her hand, pulling her into a corner. ‘What happened?’
‘Oh nothing, it’s no big deal I just literally fucking ran into her and spilled her drink everywhere and now she probably hates me. So yeah, it went great!’
‘Woah, woah. It’s okay, I’m sure she doesn’t hate you.’
‘How would you know?’
‘Well…look, can you see her now?’
‘I’m not going up to her again.’
Steve sighed. ‘I know, just point her out to me.’
Robin surreptitiously looked about the room until her gaze found the girl again. She gestured over to the drinks stand, where she was grabbing some napkins to dab at the drink stain. ‘Over there. In the purple and yellow dress.’
Steve’s face erupted in a grin. ‘What?’ Robin demanded.
‘I don’t think you have to worry about her being mad at you. That, my dear Robin, is Nancy Wheeler.’ Steve rubbed his neck. ‘We, uh, went to high school together. Anyway, she’s basically the nicest person you’ll ever meet, there’s no way she’ll be upset about you running into her.’
The panic that had been building in Robin’s chest eased a little. ‘You really think so?’
‘Absolutely. In fact, I think you should go try again.’
Robin shook her head. ‘There is no chance in hell that I am going up to her again.’
‘Come on Rob! Did I tell you about the time she dressed up as a goblin or something for her little brother’s D&D campaign? She made little pointy ears and everything!’
Robin tried not to show the endearment she felt hearing that. She crossed her arms. ‘I’m still not asking her to dance.’
Steve huffed, clearly realizing he was fighting a losing battle. ‘Fine. If you’re not going to ask her to dance, at least dance with me? How do you like this move?’ Steve shook his hips and twirled his hands around his head, all the while wearing a goofy grin.
Robin bit her lip, trying not to laugh. It would only encourage him.
She gave a dramatic sigh and took his proffered hand. ‘I suppose I’ll dance with you if I must. On one condition.’ She grinned right back at him. ‘Do not do that move ever again.’
He opened his mouth to reply, but promptly shut it again when his eyes snagged on something over Robin’s shoulder. She spun around, and nearly tripped into Nancy Wheeler’s arms for the second time that day.
She managed to right herself again, but only just. Damn her clumsiness!
‘I’m so, so sorry about your dress! Sometimes it's just like just like my feet have a mind of their own and my brain can’t control them and the same thing happens to my mouth and it's like my brain is telling it to shut up but it just keeps going and I ramble, usually when I’m nervous, oh my God I’m doing it now aren’t I? I’m sorry I–’
Nancy’s unexpected grip on her arm was enough to cut short her rambling. Robin expected the girl to hit her, or at the very least tell her to get a grip (she had heard that particular command enough times from her mother), but Nancy just laughed softly and said, ‘It’s okay. Really! You’re Robin, right?’ Her voice was soothing, much lower and calmer than she’d expected.
Robin’s eyes were fixed on the little crease between her eyebrows. She couldn’t comprehend that Nancy Wheeler was speaking to her, let alone that she knew her name. She managed a dumb nod, and Nancy’s face broke into a smile. ‘Well, I was wondering if you’d like to dance? I overheard the end of your conversation with Steve, so it's no problem if you’d prefer to dance with him, but–’
‘No, no,’ Steve cut in. He lowered his voice conspiratorially. ‘I have just noticed a very attractive young lady over there keeps looking at me. I’ll see if I can charm her with my–’ He snapped his fingers into finger guns. ‘I will see you ladies later.’ He gave them a two fingered salute, and then winked not-so-subtly at Robin, who rolled her eyes back.
She turned back to Nancy, who was looking at her expectantly. ‘Um, y-yes, I would love to dance. With you,’ she managed to say.
Nancy’s face lit up, as if Robin had made her day by accepting her offer. As if it were possible for her to say no. The other girl grabbed her hand and led her to the dance floor.
The space was filled with college students, all ranging from tipsy to pleasantly drunk, talking and laughing and dancing. Fairy lights and pulsating music filled the space.
The two of them stepped into the crowd. As Nancy started to dance again, Robin glanced down at her own feet, as if unsure what to do with them. Her eye caught on the other girl’s footwear; she was wearing pristine white converse, but above them poked a pair of pink and yellow socks, which reached nearly halfway up her calf. Robin couldn’t help but laugh. Her mother would have killed her if she ever wore something so ‘tacky’, but on Nancy they looked like they belonged.
The girl in question followed her gaze, and she too broke into a laugh. ‘I’ve been told I look like an overgrown eight year old when I wear long socks with sneakers, but I like them.’ She shrugged, as if the opinions of those people really meant nothing to her.
Robin stared at her. She felt ridiculously out of place with this cool, confident young woman. ‘You seem like you really don’t give a shit about what other people think about you,’ she finally said. ‘How do you do it?’
Nancy’s smile faded a little. ‘I spent my whole life doing exactly what everyone expected of me. I wore what all the other girls were wearing, I studied hard, I never broke the rules. When I got to high school, I dated the most popular boy at school–Steve.’
Robin choked. ‘You dated Steve?’ she exclaimed.
Nancy laughed. ‘I can’t believe it myself sometimes. Anyway, the point is I always did exactly what was expected of me. I was the perfect daughter, the perfect student, the perfect… Well, everything.’ She smiled ruefully. ‘Until I wasn’t. Long story short, I realized I was bisexual, and I guess I wasn’t seen as so perfect anymore. So I figured I might as well be completely myself.’
Robin swallowed. ‘Is-is it hard?’ she asked.
Nancy sighed, her eyes shining a little. ‘Honestly, yeah. Everyday it feels like there’s someone criticizing me for something about myself. But it’s better that than not being myself at all. And it shows you who your real friends are.’
Robin nodded slowly. ‘Is that who that boy was before?’ Nancy looked confused. ‘The one with the dark blonde hair? Is he your friend, or, like, your boyfriend, because I really don’t want to get in the way of something–’
The brunette cut her off. ‘You mean Jonathan? No, we aren’t dating. We went to the same high school, and after Steve he was my boyfriend for a bit, but we decided we’d be much better off as friends. He’s been good to me.’
She lowered her voice conspiratorially. ‘Also, our brothers are dating. They’ve been best friends since kindergarten and they’re so ridiculously in love it's disgusting.’ She wrinkled her nose, but Robin could see the hint of a smile under it. ‘Every time I’m in the room with them, I never fail to realize how single I am.’
An odd feeling stirred in Robin’s stomach at the mention of Nancy’s singleness, but she laughed nonetheless. ‘Yeah, I get that.’
Nancy’s answering smile was so full of something that Robin could only describe as tenderness that her heart skipped a beat. She couldn’t help but glance at the other girl’s soft, pink lips.
Suddenly, the music changed to an upbeat tune, and Nancy squealed, her eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree. ‘Oh, I love this song!’ she exclaimed.
She returned to her energetic dancing, and the sight of her was so beautiful that Robin couldn’t help but stare. She was even more of a mess than she had been when Robin had seen her dancing the first time; her hair was frizzy and her cheeks flushed, flecked by tiny clumps of mascara and glitter that seemed to have appeared from nowhere.
But her smile set her whole being glow, as if an aura of pure happiness and freedom surrounded her, just for this moment. Those perfect lips mouthed the words to the song under her breath, and Robin realized distantly that she would never again be able to hear this song without thinking of this moment.
Their eyes caught, and then Robin was lurching forward, pressing her lips clumsily to the beautiful angel who was standing before her.
Her mouth tasted slightly of alcohol, surely mirroring Robin’s own. Those pink lips were soft, so very soft, like what Robin had imagined the beautiful velvet dress she had once admired in a shop window must feel like. Always just out of reach, never to touch. But I’m touching her now, Robin thought distantly.
The angel in question gasped softly, and Robin’s senses came back to her in a rush. She pulled away, her cheeks scarlet. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said to the stunned girl. ‘You’re probably not interested and I really should have asked and–’
She was startled into silence by Nancy’s finger pressing to her lips. ‘You have nothing to be sorry for,’ she whispered, barely audible above the crowd still dancing around them.
Nancy gently took the lapels of Robin’s jacket in both hands. Then, very slowly, pulled her towards her, giving her plenty of time to pull away. She wants to kiss me, she realized distantly.
She looked the girl in the eyes and nodded.
Nancy had just enough time to smile before she pulled Robin into a kiss.
This time, underneath the alcohol, Robin could taste the faintest hints of strawberry lip balm. It reminded her of summers of her childhood, lazing in the sun and being chastised by her mother for eating the strawberries too quickly. This felt like another forbidden delight.
Except that it wasn’t. Nancy had kissed her: she wanted this as much as Robin did. Her heart jumped as she felt Nancy’s lips part, a tongue gently prodding at her lower lip. Robin opened her mouth, a gentle sigh escaping between them as she wrapped an arm around Nancy’s waist, pulling her in even closer.
The music and the talking faded to a soft, comforting buzz: the backing tune to a perfect moment.
When they finally broke apart, Nancy took her hand and squeezed it. ‘I really like you, Robin.’
‘I really like you too, Nancy Wheeler.’
They stood gazing at each other for a moment longer, until Nancy huffed out a laugh.
‘What is it?’ Robin asked.
‘Nothing, I just…Now I have one more reason to love this song.’
Robin returned her smile, tucking a stray brown curl behind her ear. ‘I never really got this song,’ she said. ‘But now…I think I do.’ And she kissed her again.