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It was finals season. Students frantically ran around campus like ants in a disturbed anthill, their workloads much heavier than usual, especially for slackers like Richard Collins. Ricky was a prime example of how you should not be during the most important year of high school if you wanted to have a successful career of any sort. His very best friend Ben Brookes, on the other hand, was the exact opposite of him at this point in time.
Ben also used to be a slacker when they first met in junior year, not as seriously as Ricky, of course, but overall pretty bad since he would only try in the classes he was interested in. Art and English were, of course, the main interests for our creative individual. Math was definitely a sore spot… but he made the very smart decision to buckle up and focus so that he would pass the class. Biology? Not too bad once he actually started to take notes. History was a snooze fest, but the teacher was enjoyable to be around so the knowledge stuck in his head. PE was an easy class to not try too hard and get credits so he just skirted by. Home Ec… Ben didn’t know how he would pass that class. He was the type to burn cereal without even being near any open flames.
Now that it was Ben’s senior year, classes had changed up a bit and he had some more electives than subjects (he dropped home ec), but that didn’t make it any easier for the very final projects of the second semester, aka: the last semester until they were no longer considered high school students. Until they evolved from being teens to adults. When they graduated from this hell called high school. Literally just freedom! Ben was ready to spread his wings and use his free time for endeavors of his own choosing.
Unfortunately it wasn’t quite that time just yet. Since it was the beginning of the quarter, all the finals had been announced with their due dates being the week before the last day of school. English was an essay about some crap book they had been studying since the last quarter. He decided to take statistics instead of algebra, so the final for that was to make a presentation with a group of 4 about the semester's lessons. History was another big essay about the comparison of the current political and economical state of the world compared to now, and finally there was Art.
Ben had been interested in all forms of art since he was a kid, but painting was what stuck with him the most. The feel of the brush on the canvas allowed him to express himself in a way that no other medium could do. The delicate mixing of the water colors and the contrast of acrylics layered on top of them created eye-catching and beautiful pieces of art that were worth displaying on the wall of The Louvre (that may be a bit of an exaggeration, but a man can dream!).
He had been looking forward to this final since the beginning of the year so that he could prove himself better than the rest of the class, and with that, boost his ego along with raising his chances of getting into an art college. For the final, the teacher wanted the class to do a real life study or a still life, and make it so detailed that it looked like a photograph. Ben excelled in these kinds of paintings, but he needed to have the appropriate inspiration and scenery to actually get anything done. He had a couple spots in mind that he could try out, but he had a nagging feeling telling him that none of these places were going to work out.
+++
With Art being the last class of the day, once the bell rang, Ben snagged some small leftover canvases and shoved them in his bag to take with him so that he could scout the areas he had in mind and sketch some rough drafts of the sceneries. He first had to swing by his locker to get some extra art supplies in case he needed them. Lo and behold! To no one's surprise, a certain cigarette smoking, hair spraying, jacket wearing greaser stood by his locker with that iconic shit eating grin of his.
“Heya, Brookie! I feel like I haven’t seen you around all day!”
“Hi, Ricky,” Ben said, a smile playing on his lips, “Maybe it’s because I’m hiding from you since it feels like I see you everywhere I go?” he teased. He wasn’t lying though; he really did see Ricky everywhere. From school, his night walks, the park, and even his own bedroom almost nightly for over a year now. He didn’t mind it though, he enjoyed his company. He would never tell Ricky that, though.
“Agh! My heart! Don’t be like that Brookes! You know you love having me around!” he fluttered his lashes and pouted at Ben, trying to be cute. Ben just shook his head, smirking a bit, and nudged him to the side so that he could get into his locker for what he initially came here for. Ricky pushed up close to him and slung his arm over Ben’s shoulder, being nosey and weighing him down as he rummaged through his locker.
“What’s all this for?” he asked, propping his chin on Ben’s shoulder now.
“I need to paint a real life study and I decided that I would paint some scenery around town. I have a couple spots in mind, but I’m not sure which one I want to do so I was going to just visit all of them over time to help make a decision,” Ben responded, craning his neck a bit so that Ricky’s nose wouldn't be touching it. This sort of physical contact was nothing new to either of them, though. It came as naturally as when they woke up in the mornings, Ricky laying on Ben’s chest, cradled under his arm. They had come to the silent understanding that this is just what happens when you share a bed with someone, and they didn’t dare look into it more than that.
“Ah, sounds fun! I don’t have very many finals to do so I’ve been so bored!” Ricky groaned and started sagging his body weight down on Ben with an exasperated sigh. Ben stumbled a bit under him and shoved him off, eyebrows furrowed a bit.
“Don’t knock me over, you damn shitbird,” he looked at him in his deep blue eyes that held a sparkle of amusement in them at all times. Ricky grinned and put his hands up to show that he was innocent. Ben scoffed and closed his locker. His business there was done. He patted Ricky on the shoulder as a way of saying goodbye, but Ricky caught his hand in his. It was warm and calloused, and wrapped around Ben’s fingers gently.
“Do you want me to give you a ride around to your spots? I don’t have anything to do, and it would make it a whole lot faster for you to get everything done! Plus, we would get to hang out again since it’s been a while outside of school and at night in your room!” Ricky was pleading to Ben. It was almost as if he was having withdrawals. Ben took his hand back gently, there was no resistance. The only thing left was the warmth that was still lingering on his fingers and the prickly feeling that he got from the calluses rubbing against him.
“Ricky, I appreciate the offer, but I need to follow my own method of doing this. I’ll tell you if I change my mind though, catch you later,” Ben gave a small wave and turned, feeling Ricky’s gaze boring holes into the back of his head as he walked down the hallway and out the doors. He felt a little guilty. Like he was leaving a poor innocent puppy behind as he went off to work. ‘Such is life, I need to do this my way or I’ll never get this done,’ Ben thought, eyebrows set with determination.
“Let’s see…” he wracked his brain, thinking aloud on the sidewalk outside the school entrance, “I’ll start with the river park.”
+++
Ben sat at a bench in what seemed like the 100th spot, head in hands. Nothing was speaking to him, nothing was shouting at him to paint it. The canvases were all blank, save for one with evidence of eraser marks from failed sketches numerous times. He sighed deeply and stood up. It was getting late, the sun was about to set, and the mosquitoes were starting to come out. For some reason they always ate him up big time… maybe he had sweet blood. They always left Ricky alone though, guess that’s one benefit to having a nicotine addiction.
At the thought of Ricky, Ben pondered a bit, ‘ I wonder where he decided to go again today, we haven’t been able to hang out much because of finals… I hope he isn’t stuck hanging around his house or, even worse, finding solace with Bobby’s group,’ Ben shook his head as he walked to his home from the park. ‘There’s no way he would hang out with Bobby’s group anymore, not with the falling out they had last school year,” Ben was lost in thought.
Ricky hadn’t so much as looked at that group once he became much closer with Ben, and they stung him for it. Ricky didn’t really care though, he never truly fit in with them anyways, and Ben was more than enough of a friend to make up for all of them. Kenny wasn’t a bad guy though. Ricky still shared some classes with him and occasionally asked him for advice about stuff, which he then shared with Ben who laughed at the fact that Kenny was even answering his stupid questions. Ricky liked it when Ben laughed, it made his heart squeeze nicely when he saw how his eyes crinkled up. He’d never tell Ben that though.
Ben turned the corner on the street where his apartment was and looked up, noticing that the lights were out in his room. ‘Guess Ricky decided not to come over tonight,’ he thought. He felt a little disappointed. Maybe even a bit regretful that he declined Ricky’s offer to cart him around on his bike for the rest of the day. It definitely would have saved a lot of wasted time on his unproductive adventure. They would have even been able to hang out afterwards too, since it would have counted as a much needed rest from subject hunting. If this had been a year ago, neither scenario would have even been possible because he had been dating Lola. They’ve been broken up for a while, though, on good terms… at least Ben hopes.
Clank!
The sound of the metal rail of the fire escape clanging startled Ben out of his thoughts and he looked up again. He could barely make out the sole of Ricky’s boot in the gloom of the night. He heard a chuckle and saw his form stand up, the cherry of the cigarette he had been smoking flared orange with a puff and went out as he dropped it and squashed it with his shoe.
“I thought you weren’t coming home tonight,” Ricky called down quietly, “It felt like you were gonna pull a ‘me’ and sleep on a bench in the park or something,” he laughed again. Ben just shook his head, heart beating hard under his calm demeanor as he made his way up the steps. Whether it was beating out of fear or excitement, he couldn’t tell.
“Yeah well too bad for you I made it home, and you don’t get the bed all to yourself,” Ben looked up again at Ricky, he could see his face now. He smiled, glad that Ricky actually showed up and was waiting for him. It was always nice to have company in this house. His mom and sister weren’t exactly close enough to him to quell the small loneliness inside his heart. Ricky may be loud and obnoxious sometimes, but it wasn’t annoying to deal with. Another thing he would never tell him.
Ben finally made it up to his window and Ricky pushed it open for him, waiting. Ben glanced at him as he lifted his leg and climbed into the dark room, the temperature warm in comparison to the biting cold outside. Since it was spring, the mild days led to chilly nights, not unbearable, but still unforgiving if you weren’t dressed properly. Ricky vaulted in behind him, boots stomping on the carpet.
“So much for being quiet,” Ben grumbled, feeling along the wall, “I’m surprised you haven’t been caught yet with how loud you always are.”
Ricky just laughed again, “Well I know that no one’s gonna just come barging in here anyways. You’re a smart cookie, you can think of an excuse… my brookie cookie!” This time he burst out laughing. Ben was unamused. That nickname was so stupid, how did he even think of it? And he wasn’t his cookie, that makes no sense! If anything, he was his own cookie, but, no use pondering it now, it was kind of a stupid thing to think about when you can’t even see the space in front of your nose. ‘Why is it so damn dark in here, jesus chr-’
Ben bumped into something solid and warm and the light flicked on. Ricky was standing right in front of him, looking smug, finger on the switch. Ben had run into his chest a second ago, but he was too stunned to think about that at the moment. “How did you get over here so fast…” he mused. He looked down and saw that Ricky had taken off his shoes, therefore his steps were now practically silent on the carpet. He looked up and locked eyes with Ricky, glaring a bit, “This isn’t a race, you shitbird, what if I had yelled because you scared me??”
All smiles tonight, Ricky just laughed again, “Don’t worry, I would have made sure you wouldn’t have been able to shout.” ‘What the heck is that supposed to-” Ben got pushed out of his own thoughts again as Ricky tugged him to his dresser and took his backpack from him.
“C’mon, let's get ready for bed,” he murmured as he put everything where it belonged and got out a set of pajamas for Ben and one for himself. They had developed quite the routine in the year of him coming over almost nightly. He even had his own toothbrush stashed away in the back of the top drawer of Ben’s dresser, “I know that you have a busy semester ahead of you with all your finals and whatnot, so you need your rest. Even if I don’t have much to do, I want to make sure that you succeed so I can still have a place to crash, heh, don’t think too hard about it,” Ricky stated as if that was the most normal thing in the world. Which it was for them at this point. A very normal thing, indeed. It seemed like they would be together forever, which made Ben smile a bit.
Ricky caught it from the corner of his eye as he was fishing the toothbrush out of the drawer and felt another little squeeze in his heart. That had been happening pretty often lately. Maybe he needed to get that checked out. He just smiled and sat on the bed, waiting. Ben had slipped on his pj’s and was headed out his door to grab a glass of water for Ricky to go brush his teeth out on the fire escape. Didn’t want him to get caught by Ben’s mom or sister.
Funnily enough, Ricky’s only spat on one poor stranger that had been walking under at the wrong time… poor guy. Ben had bust out laughing at the time and Ricky just didn’t want the person to hunt Ben down since he lived here. Luckily that hasn’t happened… yet.
Ben returned with the water and shoved it at Ricky before he left again to go to the actual bathroom and get ready for bed. Ricky headed to the window and brushed while looking at the night sky through the grates above him. The stars weren’t very visible, but he could see the North star and the Little Dipper among other small unknown constellations. He was lost in thought when Ben returned and closed the door softly behind him.
“What’re you still doing over there? Finish up and let’s sleep,” Ben left the light on and crawled into his side of the bed. Yes, his side. At this point in time they both had their designated spots on the bed, although that usually didn’t make a difference considering one would always wake up in the other's arms. Ricky had no complaints, it helped him sleep better to have the warmth of another person pressed to him. Ben could say the same, but he would never actually say it. It’s more of an unspoken thing. No problems with that, though.
Ricky quickly rinsed and spit, closed the window, ran to turn off the light, and jumped into bed. It jostled Ben and he smacked him on the back of the head, “Stop doing that, damn shitbird, if you break my bed you're gonna pay for it,” he grumbled and turned away from him.
“Haha, of course I would! Don’t worry, I’m not gonna break it,” Ricky assured him, rubbing his head where Ben smacked him. He scooted himself under the covers and sighed happily, the scent Ben mixed with fabric softener entering his nose as he closed his eyes to sleep. This was the life, he wouldn’t want to change anything about it. A smile played at Ricky’s lips as he drifted off into a quick slumber, sweet dreams overtaking his consciousness.
+++
Ben lay there for a while, eyes closed, but unable to fall asleep. He rolled onto his back and looked at Ricky, face highlighted by the moonlight. He had a stupid goofy expression and Ben wanted to pinch his nose to make him sputter. So he did. Ricky just opened his mouth and started to snore from the back of his throat, though. ‘Ew,’ Ben thought. He let go of his nose and closed Ricky's mouth for him, teeth clacking shut, ‘Too bad, it would have been funny,’ he pouted a bit.
Ben studies him for a while longer and he starts to notice things in more detail than he has before. Ricky’s nose is very prominent. His browline is strong, the brows themselves bushy and full. His lashes are long and dense, and his jawline is sharp, and it curved pleasantly into his neck. It felt like he was looking at a sculpture. Now, that was something Ben hadn’t tried before. He felt like sculpting Ricky would be both the easiest and the hardest thing to do. He would be able to get his likeness, but he would never be able to put the soul into it. It wouldn’t be like Ricky, and if it wasn’t like Ricky, then what was the point? That was a career shot down into oblivion before it could even try to take shape. It’s okay, though, he still has painting to fall back on even if nothing else works out.
Ben turns to face Ricky on his side now, so he can look at him head on. He’s never really looked at him like this before. It’s always been stolen glances or magnetic eye contact with him. In all these years he’s just never really felt the urge to even look at him very closely, but now was different for some reason. His hand reached out towards Ricky’s face again, this time not to pinch, but to take a finger and lightly stroke down his forehead to his brows… to the bridge of his nose… and down more to his lips. His fingers splayed and pressed them down, feeling their softness and firmness at the same time. Strange. He would have thought Ricky to have chapped lips with all that smoking he does. He brushes his thumb across Ricky’s bottom lip once more, parting it slightly before moving his hand down again to his chin… then his jaw. He grips both sides with his whole hand a little aggressively, but Ricky’s breathing is still steady. It seems he hasn’t woken up.
Ben’s heart is starting to beat a little fast at this point, he was nervous Ricky would wake up, but he’s usually a heavy sleeper, so it would probably be alright, right? His hand continues its journey. He turns Ricky's head towards him, getting a full on view of the handsome man, his face peaceful and smooth of lines. Ben just stares for a while again, committing this view to memory as his hand starts to slide down Ricky’s neck. It’s warm, his pulse is strong and fast. It’s almost as if he’s nervous about something… the hand continues. It’s now at the collar of Ricky’s shirt, fingers playing with the hemline. Ben lets out a shaky breath and his eyes flick up to Ricky’s face again. He freezes.
Ricky’s eyes are wide open and staring at him. His lips are parted, and his breath is coming out quickly and shallowly. The waning moonlight is illuminating his flaming pink ears and highlighting the quickness of his pulse that’s racing through the vein on his neck. Ben feels paralyzed, hand stuck where it is on Ricky’s collar, the heat permeating his fingertips and travelling up his arm. He swallows thickly. Ricky’s eyes dart to Ben’s throat, laser focused, and they slowly travel up to land on his lips, making Ben lick them in nervousness. Ricky blinks. The spell is broken.
Ben snatches his hand back, but Ricky catches it before it can get far. There are still no words spoken between them. He holds it gently and firmly, making it clear that he isn’t going to let go. He turns his body to face Ben’s and squeezes his hand tenderly again. Ben shivers. Ricky smiles. Ben wants to fall down a pit and just disappear. His heart is thudding in his ears, his hand is getting clammy, even his toes are starting to scrunch up. He can’t take it anymore. He squeezes his eyes shut and draws his brows in. ‘If I pretend I’m not here, then maybe he won’t see me. Maybe he won't keep doing whatever it is that he's doing ! Why is he doing this?!”
The opposite happened. Ben heard Ricky shift towards him, and the bed dipped to the point that he started rolling forward… poof. Ben was laying against Ricky’s chest. Ricky let go of his sweaty hand and slid his arm under Ben and pulled him closer. Ben wanted to shout and kick him away! He wanted to get violent and punch him and smack that stupid face. The stupid face he didn’t even know the expression of right now. He was sure that if he opened his eyes right now to look, he’d regret it. He knew it. It was super obvious. Obviously. He’s not in denial about anything. Obviously. Right? Right.
So he just laid there and took it. Let Ricky manhandle him for once in his life. Ben felt a hand slowly run up his neck and sift through his hair softly, tenderly and it made a shiver go up his spine. He could hear Ricky’s heartbeat mixed with his own, thundering, booming. At least he wasn’t the only one going insane here. Maybe they both had a disease. That makes sense. Why else would they be doing something like this? Obviously.
Ricky pulled Ben in even closer to his body, they were stuck together like glue at this point. How close can you even get with someone before you start melting into them? This has got to be unhealthy. And yet, Ben still didn’t move away. If anything, he truly did start melting into Ricky, and Ricky into him. It was quite comfortable, if you didn’t think about it too hard. Quite secure too. He would definitely be able to sleep like this. Ben’s pride prickled a bit, feeling like it had been crushed down. ‘Honestly, Ricky shouldn’t be the only one calling the shots here, right?’
With that thought, Ben brought his arms up as best as he could in Ricky’s crushing embrace and wrapped his arms around him as well. It seemed impossible, but Ricky’s heartbeat started to get even faster. Ben’s face felt like it was vibrating as it was pressed against his chest. He giggled under his breath and clutched the back of Ricky’s shirt. Ricky laughed and brushed his lips on the top of Ben’s head. They hugged even more tightly, inhaling each other's scents. Ben still couldn't bring himself to meet Ricky’s gaze, but it was okay. Everything would be fine. With his heart still racing and mind still working overtime, exhaustion finally took him to sleep, and Ricky followed along soon after.
+++
That morning started with Ben untangling himself from Ricky’s limbs. Or at least he tried to. The other boy had him in an iron grip, his arms felt like boa constrictors around him getting tighter the more he struggled to break free.
“Ricky,” Ben ended up wheezing, “Let me go. I need to go pee,” he felt like he was about to pass out from loss of blood circulation, “I know you’re awake! Free me you bastard!” Ben started thrashing around like a madman, limbs breaking free from the vice grip and starting to fly with murderous intent towards Ricky. Ricky laughed and let him go, freedom at last! Ben gave Ricky a sharp look before darting off to the bathroom. Guess it wasn’t just an excuse after all.
Ricky lay in bed, feeling the warmth of Ben leave him and dissipate into the air. He lifted his hand and studied it. It was the one that had held Ben’s the night prior. It didn’t look any different, but it felt all tingly like he was still touching Ben. Just thinking about it had Ricky’s heart racing again. ‘Brookie…’ Ricky thought wistfully. He brought his hand up to his lips and kissed his palm once, sweetly. If only Ben would have looked at him last night, he would have… on second thought, maybe it was a good idea that he didn’t. Ricky’s arm flopped back down as he turned to lay on his back and stared at the popcorn ceiling, wondering what would happen after this.
In the bathroom, Ben was vigorously brushing his teeth and staring at himself in the mirror. His hair was mussed and crazy (especially in the back), his ears red, and his neck was flushed peeking out from under his collar. He hoped that Ricky hadn’t noticed his dishevelled appearance. He had an image to uphold! He glared at his reflection before he spat out the toothpaste and rinsed his mouth. Some image he had now. How was he gonna act when he went back in that room? How could he act? No matter what he did, something had definitely changed between them. His heartbeat stuttered a bit as he had that thought. He didn’t want to acknowledge it. Acknowledge what? Exactly. With that, he shot himself a final dirty look before composing himself as cool as a cucumber, fixing his hair, and heading back to his bedroom where Ricky was waiting for him.
+++
So it turns out that it’s easy for people to act like nothing happened after something definitely did happen between them. Ben and Ricky are pros at pretending, if it wasn’t obvious at this point. Only under the cover of darkness and moonlight would they ever bare their true feelings to one another. Even if it was just through actions and not words. Which is another thing that they were professionals at.
With the threat of his finals breathing down Ben’s neck, he decided to really take things seriously. Considering that he couldn’t focus at home with a certain someone always there, he chose to start going to the library whenever he had a free moment. Ricky was not a fan. Less time with Ben meant more time to figure out how to entertain himself. That was not something he could do well, so Ricky instead used his brain power to hatch a plan… a plan involving Ben’s childhood friend, Stuart.
With Ben in the library, Ricky found it almost laughably easy to approach Stuart after class ended. That was the easy part, though. The hard part would be to convince him of anything.
“Hey-a Stewey! Lookin’ sharp as ever!” Ricky sauntered up to Stuart’s desk with the confidence of a king. Stuart looked up at him, unamused.
“What do you need, Richard? You’ve only talked to me if it’s about Benji or if you want help with your work,so which is it?” Stuart raised an eyebrow and leaned back in his chair as he looked at Ricky head on. He was right on the mark. Ricky’s eartips turned red as he coughed awkwardly.
“Right on the money buck-o!” he said way too loudly, getting some looks from any remaining students in the room, “I need a favor if you could be so kind…”
+++
It had been about 3 weeks since Ben had started studying in the library, a nice and quiet space for students to agonize about their final projects, just like Ben was doing. It had also been about three weeks since he last saw Ricky. Truly, it was very odd and out of character for him to not be hanging around him 24/7 to pester him for attention. This did not help with Ben’s inability to focus, but he decided that Ricky being there would be more distracting than not, so he didn’t pursue the matter. It’s healthy for friends to spend time apart too… you can’t be together all the time, right?
Ben buried his nose in one of the many books in front of him. He was a little over halfway through his subjects, and it felt like he had gone through just about every book in the library at that point. He was just rereading the same sentence for the third time when the front library door slammed open. He and the other few students in the library jumped and their heads all whipped to the figure striding through the door, confidence basically dripping off of their every step. They didn’t even spare Ben a glance as they strode straight to the librarian, waving a lanyard in front of their face.
“Hey-a teach, I’m the new assistant,” Ricky tilted his head and smirked as he let the ID card drop on the counter, “is there anything ya need me for right now?”
The librarian looked up from her documents with a scary smile as she steepled her fingers in front of her, resting her chin on them, “Actually, yes I do! You came at just the right time!” She pulled out a huge stack of paper from seemingly nowhere and dropped it on the counter with a thud, “could you be a doll and go through these lists and make sure the books are actually here in the library, please? Thanks!” she sat down again and resumed her perusing.
Ricky stood there like a statue. Seemed like he didn’t expect that he actually needed to do any work as a librarian's assistant. Ben had to bury his head in his arms to hold in a laugh, so much for no distractions. What was Ricky doing here anyways? Being a librarian’s assistant was the last thing Ben could’ve imagined him as. He watched from the corner of his eye as Ricky dejectedly grabbed a paper from the top of the stack and dragged himself to an aisle to get started. Ben shook his head and got back to studying, Ricky’s pain being fuel for his motivation to work.
From the aisle Ricky was in, you could hear grumbling and the sound of a pen writing aggressively on paper, “Stupid freakin librarian, stupid freakin library, stupid freakin books… stupid freaking finals, stupid freakin school, stupid freakin Ben not paying attention to me… not even asking where I’ve been,” his lip was in a permanent pout, the confidence from earlier was left in a puddle at the librarians desk, “I did all this for him and he didn’t even care… I bet he didn’t even look at me. Stupid books taking all his time.”
While Ben had been studying, Ricky had taken it upon himself to insert himself where he could be with Ben all the time again. Obviously he missed his best friend! Who wouldn’t? Stuart had actually been no help at all, but Mr. Wilkins had overheard their conversation and suggested that he do community service in exchange for him asking a favor from the librarian since they were pretty close. Ricky had enthusiastically agreed, not knowing that he would be in for 3 entire weeks of scraping the gum from under the desks, picking up the garbage from the campus, washing the mirrors in the bathroom, and a whole lot more that left Ricky with PTSD whenever he looked at a toilet. He had been so exhausted that he had been going straight home and passing out until he had to go to school again the next day. Such is the determination of a boy with a will strong enough to move mountains when he sets his mind to it.
Ben closed his last book of the day and stretched his arms above his head with a groan. It felt like he had been sitting down all day (which he basically had been if you count being in the classrooms at school as well). He stood up and grabbed the books he had set out and went to return them to their spots. Everytime he passed the aisle Ricky was in it seemed like his grumbling just kept getting louder and louder. Ben purposefully didn’t look at him and that made him rage even harder. It seemed like that pen was going to rip through the paper soon. Hilarious!
At some point in time, Ben had to be in the aisle that Ricky was at. Ben peeked around the corner, and to his luck, Ricky had his back turned away from him. It was the perfect time to strike. Ben creeped up slowly behind him and raised his arms a bit, hands in position… and jabbed Ricky’s sides causing him to yelp and almost drop the papers he was holding. Ben started tickling his side vigorously and Ricky had to drop the stack in a hurry before he burst out laughing. His wheezing was already easy to hear since it was so quiet.
He grabbed Ben’s hands and pulled him forward, causing him to crash into Ricky’s back with an oomph. Ricky then wrapped Ben’s arm around his own torso and squeezed his hands tight. Ben was trapped. Ricky was elated that he was finally being paid attention too, but he needed to seem angry so he wouldn’t seem too desperate.
“What’s the big idea, Ben? You don’t see me for a while and then you don’t even say hello to me when I put myself in front of you? Talk about rude!” he squeezed Ben’s hands one last time and then let him go, turning around to face him, eyebrow raised in questioning.
Ben was looking up at him, eyes twinkling, and a small smile was hinting at the corners of his lips. Ricky could get lost in those green eyes of his. They were so beautiful. If he was an artist, those eyes would be at the center of all his paintings. As it was, most of his poems were about Ben anyways, what’s another thing to base around him?
“So, you came here on purpose then, Ricky? You chose to be the assistant so that you could be near me, is that it?” Ben took a step forward towards Ricky, whose back was pressed up to the shelf, his heart stuttered again, “You couldn’t handle me studying alone, so you decided to find me? You wanted to be in my sight at all times? Is it because you missed me, Ricky?”
Ben took another step. Ricky’s heart felt like it would jump out of his throat, he could feel the heat creeping up his neck as he looked at Ben, who had tilted his head to the side, and was smirking up at him. Internally, Ben was laughing his ass off. It’s not often you see Ricky this flustered. He was definitely going to savor this. He pointed his finger and pressed it to Ricky’s chest, right where his heart was about to explode, “Not gonna say anything, Ricky?” Ben laughed a bit.
Ricky steeled himself and snatched up Ben’s finger in a wave of boldness. I’m not gonna let him tease me when he didn’t even acknowledge me walking in here! He swallowed and stared back at Ben with a fire in his eyes, “So what if I did? Is it so wrong to miss your best friend? Why are you trying to tease me about it, Brookie?” he scowled.
They were both staring at each other. Ben’s heart started to race just as much as Ricky’s. He swallowed, apparently it was a nervous habit reserved for Ricky’s eyes only. Ricky’s grip on Ben’s finger loosened and Ben took a step back, both of them taking a breath.
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Ben looked at his shoes, ‘I missed you too…’ the words were on the tip of his tongue, but he didn’t dare say them. That would be too much.
“I gotta put this last book away, do you wanna go home together once I’m packed up?” Ben asked Ricky, changing the subject pretty abruptly. Ricky’s pretend anger melted away and he became elated at the idea of going home with Ben again after so long.
“Yeah, sure. I’ll be waiting by the door,” he picked up the papers that had been strewn on the floor and brushed past Ben, the scent of hair spray and tobacco lingering in the air. Ben stood there for a second and collected himself, he needed to get it together. He needed to act normal.
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They had gotten back into their routine of spending all their time with each other again. Both of them were overjoyed, to no one's surprise. The walk home on the first night had been a pleasant one, one’s shoulder had touched the other’s, hands had brushed together, their paths seemed to intersect one too many times, causing them to bump into one another. It was nice.
Strangely enough, Ricky’s presence in the library helped Ben blast through all his studying and notes he needed to take for his finals. All that was left was the real life study for art, which he was still stuck on. He massaged his temples and stared at the blank canvas in front of him. He was getting frustrated and was at the point where he would choose just about anything to get a grade. He sighed and started to pack up his paints that were laid out on the table when Ricky sleeping next to him caught his eye.
He was laying with his arms folded under him, the setting sun caressing his face and illuminating the highlights in his hair and lashes.The specks of dust in the air were softly dancing around Ricky, making him seem like some ethereal being deep in slumber. Once again, Ben’s eyes were drawn to Ricky’s strong outline, his sharp brows and delicate lashes, his straight nose and the soft set to his lips. Without thinking, Ben picked up the pencil and started to draw, so consumed that he was unaware of the thumping in his chest.
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The End :D