Chapter Text
George: Looks like *some* of you need a reminder on what leaving room on track means. Please review the rulebook before the next race. The manoeuvres today were unsafe.
Lewis: Yeah guys, it was just unsafe today. Please imagine what your families would think of you putting your life in danger like that.
Zhou: my mom would chase me with a slipper if i did that
Yuki: omg me too
Charles: wtf
Alex: me too #justasianthings
Max: my dad would leave me 5 hours away from home
Yuki: omg me too #justredbullthings
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Alex: Zhou, Yuki, to the other groupchat!
Yuki: 🏃🏻
Pierre: You have another chat?
Zhou: Asian trio only back off
Oscar: let me innnn LET ME INNNN
Alex: for the last time australia is not in asia
Oscar: im 1/16th chinese you're being racist
Zhou: i cant argue with that
Yuki: i say we let him in
Alex: fine but you can only send a message once every 16 messages
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George: *video link*
Interviewer: Ayumu, this was your first time in the car this year. We love having you on track and it was great to see you having some little battles even in a practice session. How was it to be out there with your countryman Tsunoda?
Ayumu: Tsunoda.
Interviewer: Pardon?
Ayumu: It's Tsunoda. You said it like Suh-no-da.
George: Yuki... have we all been pronouncing your name wrong this whole time?
Yuki: a little bit but its ok
Lewis: No it's not. Why didn't you correct us?
Yuki: its fine. i know its hard for people to pronounce. same reason i am called yuki in english
George: ....
George: ????
George: Your name isn't Yuki??
Yuki: yes and no
Alex: HE'S BEEN IN THIS SPORT FOR 5 YEARS AND JUST DECIDES TO DROP THIS LORE ON A RANDOM FRIDAY
Charles: This is so ominous??? wdym yes and no???
Yuki: well... my name is 裕毅 which is spelt yuuki but 2 u is hard for english
George: Oh my! We've been spelling your name wrong all these years
Yuki: no its ok i chose yuki so its ok
Alex: HOLY LORE DROP DID ANYONE KNOW THIS???
Isack: I did!
Liam: ☝️ weeb
Liam: but yeah I knew. I was there when he decided to drop a u
Charles: Pierre did you know?
Pierre: ...no 😔
Zhou: oh so now we care about how to pronounce names???
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Lewis: OK. I'm planning the end of season grid BBQ. What sauces and salad dressings do people want?
Oscar: i like french dressing
Esteban: wtf is French dressing????
Pierre: yeah i have never seen French dressing in my life???
Yuki: i'd like to see a french undressing
Esteban: ?????????
Yuki: what??? who said that????
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Yuki: bitches love my yarms
Pierre: wtf are yarms????
Yuki: they're on the side of my yody. near the yiddies.
Charles: ????
Yuki: the yody is above the yighs
Max: can someone help my teammate??? something is clearly wrong with him
Yuki: the girlies love the yussy too
Pierre: !?!??!!
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Yuki: Oscar, your mum says you need to buy milk on your way home
Oscar: ????
Oscar: Yuki????
Oscar: Yuki what are you doing in my house????
Yuki: Nicole invited me
Oscar: what the fuck
Yuki: she also says you need to blow up the air mattress because i am using your bed
Oscar: ??????
Yuki: I'm the favourite son now bitch
Oscar: ???!???!!
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Kimi: *photo*
Kimi: yuki... why is the media sharing photos of you in the mercedes hospitality??? am i losing my seat??? should i be talking to other teams???
Ollie: no bc why was i sent a photo of him in haas last week???
Ollie: *photo*
Charles: I saw him in the McLaren hospitality on Friday too!
Kimi: how many teams is he talking to????
Max: Yuki, are you leaving Red Bull?
Yuki: huh?
Yuki: what are you even talking about?
Yuki: i was just eating lunch
Max: In other team's hospitality?
Yuki: yeah
Kimi: WHY?????
Yuki: why not? you dont do that?
Kimi: NO????
Kimi: are we even allowed to do that????
George: Not unless you're invited. Yuki we need to talk about this.
Yuki: i WAS invited. each week the catering people for each team invite me to taste their food. they take turns.
Yuki: none of you get invited?
Kimi: no????
Ollie: no wtf
Max: Does Red Bull know about this?
Yuki: of course! they save catering money bc i always eat somewhere else
Esteban: That has to be a cost cap scam!! Someone report this!!!
Yuki: nooooooooo please don't report me! sauber are having satay chicken next week
