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“Why would I, the head chef of the most successful-”
“-No doubt helped by the criminally high price of your shumai,”
“and respectable fine dining establishments-”
“also known as a restaurant”
“in the country want to go gallivanting with you to some backwoods tavern full of peasants?!” Yuan Shao spat the words as though they were food that had molded over lifetimes. He arched an affronted eyebrow at the man so oftentimes found to be the source of his ire. Cao Mengde.
Cao Cao jabbed an unimpressed chopstick at the exorbitantly priced dumplings. They were arranged in a formation pleasing to the eyes of the clientele frequenting this establishment. The fanciful – and inedible – garnish occupied more space than the dish itself. Lustrous gold flakes, delicate petals of a vibrant violet shade, fresh herbs shaped into quaint spirals all placed with maddening attention to detail. Cao Cao moves the gold dipped leaf before the soy sauce can soil it. This looks less like sustenance and more like a decoration affixed to that god awful lamp Sun Jian purchased at last week’s antique auction. Yuan Benchu’s aggrieved stares and melodramatic rants he could handle. Welcome even. Being surrounded by people expecting his friend to entertain them like a fool was another issue in and of itself. Cao Cao chews on a dumpling expressionless.
“You are unable to appreciate my food? Is that it?” snapped Yuan Shao.
Cao Cao met Yuan Shao’s eyes for the first time since suggesting they drink elsewhere. Beneath the glare he’d witnessed send disrespectful customers and incompetent staff cowering, there was something akin to hesitation. Three decades of knowing the man had conditioned Cao Cao to pinpoint the emotion at a glance. Self-doubt. Fear of rejection. Adulthood had not changed him from the boy who had cried when the ever-unimpressive Gonglu berated him. If Cao Cao were a sentimental man, his heart would have stopped. Moved him even to reassure his oldest friend that his cooking was one of the few things that brought him comfort without fail; but Cao Mengde was anything but sentimental. He was, in fact, a menace.
“Calm yourself, Benchu. I had only meant that I am simply unable to appreciate anything when surrounded by all of this formality. Not everybody is as accustomed as you are to extravagance of this level after all.” Cao Cao sipped on his wine innocently as Yuan Shao murmured to himself, letting the words marinate. He let out a satisfied hum. As expected.
“Oh but of course you don’t! Spending time with those rabid-”
Cao Cao stuffed an entire dumpling into his mouth stopping him mid-lecture. He then chewed with his mouth open to maximize his irritating potential. The offended scoff the act elicited amused him more than it should have.
“Yes yes, I am nothing but an uncultured wretch.” Cao Cao ate another dumpling and continued with his mouth full. “Please be patient with my apparent lack of manners as I am trying to educate myself. I am but an unlearned Cao after all, so it will likely take another three decades of observing you to attain your level of refinement.”
The smugness creeping on his face could no longer be withheld. With that, Yuan Shao raised his spatula. Cao Cao’s response was to carelessly pop another dumpling into his mouth, now smacking his lips as obnoxiously as possible. Thank you, cousin for demonstrating how to eat like a wild dog instead of a grown man. He glanced up. His victim was deep in thought – considering if the beaten eggs on the pan undergoing immolation would be worth the momentary satisfaction of smacking the infuriating man lounging on the kitchen counter. The oil popped and Yuan Shao exhaled sharply. His decision is clear. The eggs have been rescued and Cao Cao escapes once again: consequence free. As usual. The notorious Cao Mengde chortles to himself at yet another victory. Yuan Shao refused to admit defeat however.
“Is this what you came here for then? To beg for a free meal and not even seconds later, bite the hand that feeds you?” Yuan Shao demanded. He folded the egg with masterful precision in spite of the blood boiling smile Cao Cao directs his way. A true testament to his dedication to the culinary arts.
The man responsible for Yuan Shao’s torment lifted a hand to his chest. “I did no such biting!” He gasped in mock offense. “You dare confuse me with Lü Bu? I am the one who should be insulted!”
“But you do not deny that you stormed into my kitchen begging for a free meal like some vagrant?!”
“Oh, Benchu. You should be flattered! It is rare I find cooking so delicious I stoop to such desperate tactics.” He meant every word which seemed to infuriate the man before him even more.
Cao Cao hopped off his stool and strode toward the irate chef folding an immaculate omelet. Teeth are nearly ground to a fine powder when the ingrate throws an arm over his shoulder.
“You should rejoice!” Yuan Shao scowled when Cao Cao lifted his other hand in a manner he reserved for his army. “Not only have you graced this poor barbaric soul with your generosity, you have also provided me with amusement - dinner and a show! For free! Your reputation truly precedes you, Benchu!”
Yuan Shao refused to stare at the self-satisfied man gloating in his ear. “Cao Mengde” He warned. “If you do not unhand me at once-”
“And to repay you, I shall buy you a drink!” Cao Cao continued. He flashed Yuan Shao the most innocuous smile he could muster to meet the older man’s confusion.
“Wh- a drink?! You dare assume I would accept one from you?!!! After this insult to propriety you have forced me to endure for the past hour?!!”
Cao Cao’s lips twitched into an unashamed smile that rarely, if ever, indicated good things to come. “Yes.”
“You insolent fool!”
“But-” Cao Cao began.
“After all my years, I have never met”
“Yuan Shao-”
“Someone as foolhardy as you-”
“Benchu.”
“A drink from you?! How stupid do you think I am??!!”
“Yuan Benchu-”
“What, Cao Aman?!”
Cao Cao cleared his throat. “Would it not be rude to reject my show of gratitude?” He said. His arm remained wrapped around Yuan Shao as he continued. “You are a man of nobility after all.”
Yuan Shao was rendered speechless at the gall. The cheek. The absolute nerve. The fact that he had been outplayed at his own game. But he could not ignore the obvious truth that lay at the heart of this matter. “All this foolishness…just to go out drinking with me?” He asked in exasperation.
It was Cao Cao’s turn to be at a loss of words. He could say a million things. Of course not- This is just an excuse to get a laugh at your expense as always- I do this to everybody, so it’s not as though you're special- It’s just been a while since we've gone drinking together… But he cannot find it in himself to lie. “Is it so wrong to want to spend time with a friend?” The words came out more genuine than he’d wanted. Cao Cao chose to say nothing more for fear of giving away more. He only stared at Yuan Shao, waiting for his response. He didn’t understand why seconds became hours while anticipating the answer.
Yuan Shao put the spatula down and let out a bone deep sigh. His full attention now directed towards Cao Cao and smiling in weary exasperation, he answered. “Very well.” The relief that flooded Cao Cao would have been humiliating if it was anybody else. “Only one.” Yuan Shao added.
Cao Cao laughed at that. He knew it wouldn’t be one. It never was. Even after all these years, things hadn't changed one bit. And for that, he would always be grateful.