Work Text:
Change is something that happens to everyone, Lou knew this all too well. They were a different person when they met her, she changed them, left scars that would always be etched into their skin long after she left. It was that change that made them seek out a solution to their pain, the scars and sleepless nights. And they found it in the CMP.
It brought that closer Lou had been looking for, that healing that allowed her to move on from everything that happened and live again. It was exactly what Lou needed at the time, and Lou would always appreciate everything that was done for them, it was why they kept wearing the mask once everything ended.
However this came at a price, they couldn’t talk about what had happened. They couldn’t mention the CMP by name, what they did, the people they talked too and bonded over, the pain, the healing, the fear, the end. It was all something that would be held a secret, locked away and hidden from the world, as if it had never happened in the first place, a fantasy in a story that would never be told.
They try to understand why they couldn’t talk about it. Certain things that happen would be controversial and looked down upon, and that was understandable for Lou. They didn’t have to talk and that was fine with them. But they didn’t understand why they couldn’t talk to the other CMP employees that were there. Surely still talking to one another outside the CMP should be fine? Would it really be that bad to keep those connections she’d made?
It was hurtful, to say the least, that she would have to be kept away from them, that she wouldn’t be allowed to say their names, or hold them again. To be able to know that there was at least one of them that she could talk to about everything that had happened, instead of keeping it a secret till she became nothing with everything else.
It hurt, but she could live. Maybe one day she’d run into one of those friends out in the wild and befriend the person they were outside of the CMP, and start something new with them. Or be lost in the footnotes of that time they shared together. Maybe she can find a loophole like she had done before and keep in contact with them. Or maybe defy the rules all together, and risk it all for them.
She’d done it once before; she could do it again. And that thought made her happy.