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The Leech twins were overjoyed to see Azul. His thinness frightened them, but apart from that, he was getting better.
As always, Idia observed from a distance, quietly recording every reaction. Azul chatted with the twins about the restaurant and the school. But in front of his parents, he cried. It was as if he was releasing all the pain he had carried while being kidnapped by Rollo.
His speech was returning to normal, even his old mannerisms began to resurface. Azul no longer hid in his little fort. They gave him back his usual clothes and allowed him to leave the cell, but the collar stayed for safety.
Azul refused to speak about Rollo or the captivity. Whenever someone mentioned him, Azul’s expression shifted. Fear flickered in his eyes, and he fell silent.
Even his eating habits had changed. Idia hadn’t paid much attention at first, but eventually he noticed that Azul never finished his meals.
Idia didn’t know how to start that conversation. He went back to his usual comfort, story-driven video games and visual novels, and wrote down what he could or couldn’t say.
During another card game with Azul, Idia finally spoke.
“Have you thought about changing your menu?”
“I’m fine with it,” Azul replied.
“Then why don’t you finish your meals?”
Idia heard Azul swallow hard.
“You’ve gotten a lot thinner, you know.”
“Stop,” Azul interrupted, setting down his cards.
Idia regretted bringing it up. He regretted coming at all.
“You… don’t know?” Azul wrapped his arms around himself.
“I… know they tortured you,” Idia said.
Azul lowered his head and took a shaky breath.
“Can you… arrange a meeting with my mother and the psychologist?” he asked. “I… I need to tell everything.”
“Azul, are you sure?” Idia asked. — This isn’t like a video game. You can’t reload a save anytime you want. Well, depending on the game, I guess.”
“I-I’m sure.”
A tremor ran through Azul’s body.
Idia didn’t know what to do. Ortho had told him that sometimes silence was better, so Idia just sat there, wondering how long he should keep sitting.
***
Idia once again decided not to be present during Mrs. Ashengrotto’s visit. He watched everything through the surveillance camera in his room.
At first glance, everything seemed fine: Azul was glad to see his mother, he met with the psychologist, and everything looked as if he was healed. Ready to return to school without concern.
Idia noticed the change again today. Seated at the table, Azul’s confident smile faltered. His clasped hands began to tremble.
Idia switched on the audio feed and put on his headphones.
“Azul, you don’t have to…,” said Mrs. Ashengrotto.
“Mom, I must,” Azul replied.
“You don’t need to do this.”
“I-I can’t keep it in anymore… I-I have to… to tell…”
Idia thought this was a mistake. He was sure Azul would break down again, crushed by the memories.
“R-Rollo… he… he…,” Azul covered his eyes with his hand.
“Azul, you’re safe now,” the psychologist said softly. “Rollo can’t hurt you. He doesn’t know where you are. He doesn’t know about the island.”
Azul nodded, drew a deep breath, and lowered his hand.
“He made me an offer,” he confessed. “One I couldn’t… refuse. B-because I… wanted to become… h-human…”
Idia switched cameras and caught Mrs. Ashengrotto’s stunned face.
“You accepted it?” she asked.
“F-forgive me…,” Azul bowed his head, shutting his eyes. “I don’t hate you, Mom. I hate myself. I… I…”
Azul hid his face in his hands and began to cry.
That was exactly what Idia had predicted. Azul couldn’t bear to tell what had happened.
“We can stop here,” said the psychologist gently.
“No!” Azul dropped his hands, his eyes blazing through tears. “I need to continue! I have to…”
Idia shook his head and covered his mouth. It felt like watching a scene from a tragic visual novel where the protagonist finally confessed his pain. But this time, it wasn’t fiction.
“When I said “yes,” Azul continued, “Rollo s-said he would… make me a real human. But in exchange, I had to… to give him a part of myself…”
Idia frowned, curiosity mixing with dread.
“They b-brought an axe… or something like that…,” Azul’s hands clenched tighter. “They… c-cut off my… tentacles…”
Tears streamed down his cheeks.
Idia pressed his hand harder over his mouth.
“They… ate them. Ate them! Ate them!” Azul cried, clutching his shoulders. “I begged them to stop! I told them I’d gather magic for him myself, that I’d become Rollo’s weapon willingly! Anything to make it stop! But he kept eating! Eating! Eating!!!”
Unable to hold back any longer, Azul buried his face in his palms and screamed.
Now everything made sense. Idia wasn’t surprised. Anyone in Azul’s place would have gone mad and become a fanatic.
Idia watched as Mrs. Ashengrotto gently wrapped her arms around her son, stroking his hair as he sobbed. Through the crying, Idia couldn’t make out her words.
“I d-didn’t want to h-hurt anyone…,” Azul wept. “I just wanted them to stop! I’m sorry, Mommy! I’m sorry!!!”
His voice changed. It grew thin, high-pitched, fragile. Idia had never heard him sound like that before.
“Oh gods,” Ortho said, peeking from behind the chair. “He’s regressing.”
“What?” Idia pulled off his headphones.
“It’s a defense mechanism. When the mind can’t handle trauma, it reverts to childlike behavior.”
“So Azul will act like a child now?”
“For a while, yes. It’s not dangerous. It’s part of recovery.”
“I’m sure if Azul knew that, he’d never have opened up at all.”
***
That night, Azul couldn’t sleep.
He was relieved to have finally spoken the truth, yet exhaustion weighed on him so heavily that tears kept slipping down his face.
He didn’t know what had been harder: confessing to his mother that he had wanted to remain human forever or reliving the torture itself. Either way, he feared how she would see him now.
But she hadn’t pushed him away. The whole evening, she had held him close, stroking his hair. The same way she used to when she found him crying many years ago.
Now, what worried him was how to return to his old life. Eating still made him sick. Every attempt to focus ended in memories of Rollo, of pain, of the sound of his own screams.
Azul closed his eyes and wished the sea monsters would drag Rollo to the bottom and tear him apart.
The door creaked open, and a quiet voice called:
“Azul?”
Idia stepped closer to the bed, where Azul lay curled up, knees to his chest. He sat down on the edge.
“I know you’re awake,” Idia said. “So, uh… how did it go?”
Silence hung between them. Idia shifted, ready to leave, until a trembling, desperate voice broke through.
“I-I thought… it would make me feel… b-better… I just w-want to be… the w-way I was…”
“You don’t go back to what you were,” Idia said quietly. “I know that.”
“H-how… how could you know?”
Idia took a deep breath.
“When Ortho died, it felt like something inside me was being ripped apart. That pain never stopped. I thought that if I brought him back, maybe it would go away. Sometimes I think… if Ortho had lived, I’d be different. Not an otaku, maybe… I don’t even know what I’d be. I was just a kid back then.”
Azul turned toward him. The faint blue glow of Idia’s hair washed over the room. Looking at it, Azul stopped seeing the torn tentacles, the blood and the cruel smile of Rollo.
“Will you stay?” Azul whispered.
“Yes,” Idia said. “I’ll just… play my game here. It’s got hot demons and a sex scene.”
“I don’t care. I just don’t want to be alone.”
Idia smiled faintly.
***
All night, Idia played his video game, not noticing when Azul had finally fallen asleep.
It was only by dawn, after finishing a long quest, that Idia lay down beside the little tent. Just as he heard quiet sobs. He turned and saw Azul trembling.
“Azul?” Idia asked softly, touching his shoulder.
“I shouldn’t have agreed…,” Azul curled up tighter. “I shouldn’t… I shouldn’t have…”
“What shouldn’t you have done?”
Azul opened his tear-streaked eyes and saw Idia’s anxious face lit by the glow of his burning hair.
“I wanted to be human… with all my heart,” Azul whispered. “I thought I could outsmart Rollo, but… idiot!” He covered his face with his hands. “I’m the biggest idiot!”
“Hey,” Idia said, gently patting his shoulder. “It’s all right. I tried to make a deal too”
Azul lowered his hands.
“When Ortho died, I went to the King of the Underworld,” Idia said. “We made a bargain: Ortho would live again if I walked through the tunnel without looking back. But at the very end, I turned around… and lost him forever.”
“You were just… a child…,” Azul sobbed. “I’m seventeen…”
“I know,” Idia said. “But I think… I’d do the same thing again if I had another chance to make that deal. I get it, Azul. When you’re desperate enough, you’ll make a pact with anyone. Just to stop the pain.”
Azul wiped his eyes and sat up.
“I don’t know what to do with myself.”
Honestly, neither do I,” Idia admitted, sitting down beside him. “Guess we’ll just have to live with it.”