Chapter Text
It felt like someone shoved a knife into his chest and turned it around, only to leave it there, letting golden liquid flow out. The only bad thing about being genuinely nice person, was that you tended to be that even if you felt angry or sad. The worst thing was that even if your heart was made from pure gold, you couldn't afford a bulletproof vest for yourself. Pure gold was too soft to protect itself on it's own. The words were the bullets, sometimes they were knives, forks, arrows... you name it. He needed to patch himself up only to get shot down again.
It was yet another, sunny morning. Birds were singing, flowers were blooming. Everything was wonderful.
"Go fuck yourself, Shittymatsu. Nobody cares what you think," was told straight to his face, cold, out of spite.
Or... Not?
Karamatsu stood there, silently. He was supposed to be used to this, it was nothing new in this household. Still, it echoed around his head, hitting every possible nerve. He smiled, by default. He didn't know what to say to his purple brother who was still staring at him. Was he expecting him to respond somehow? What was he supposed to do?
"Tsk, you're so fucking annoying too," his brother hissed before walking past him, showing him aside.
Karamatsu looked after his brother in confusion. He didn't understand why Ichimatsu was mad, why everyone seemed to be mad at him at any given time, and in all honesty, he didn't want to understand. It hurt enough to even think up reasons for their behavior, and the truth would probably hurt him ten times more.
The blue Matsu sighed as he walked back into kitchen where their mother was cooking some breakfast up. He offered to help, which the older woman accepted happily.
"I see that your dear younger brother woke up with foot at wrong side of bed," she sighed as she poured rise water out from the kettle. Karamatsu just hummed in response, washing the salad in other sink. "Don't let it get to you, Karamatsu. I know it must be hard."
"I try, mother," Karamatsu responded with his trademark smile. He appreciated his mother's attempt to make him feel better. She didn't have slightest idea how much worse things his brothers told him almost daily, and he was glad that she didn't know. It would probably break her heart. He felt her pat his shoulder before walking to oven to heat up some chicken and the sauce. Karamatsu looked after her a moment before turning his gaze towards the window.
The sky was slowly turning bright blue outside.
The breakfast went swimmingly. Or, as good as it would ever go. Everyone was too tired to start up any major arguments yet, so they ended up eating their food mostly in silence. Jyushi, of course, was soon his usual energetic self after getting some food into his system, and was soon bouncing up and down on his seat, Choro asking him to stop after a while. It was no use, everyone knew that. Totty was next to get up from the table, saying that they needed to go to work. Most of the brothers, expect Ichi, said goodbyes to Totty, before the pink Matsu disappeared from kitchen and the front door was opened and closed, leaving the five remaining siblings in silence of the apartment. Their parents had left to work early on, which wasn't surprising. They rarely even saw the two nowadays. Maybe hey had really gotten a divorce but agreed to not sell the house, for the sextuplets' sake. Who knows.
"I'm heading off to feet the cats," Ichi sighed as he got up from the table too.
"Ah, big bro, can I come too? I want to go to practice some baseball today!" Jyushi asked cheerfully. Ichi looked at him for a moment before rolling his eyes and making a motion with his hand that told him to hurry up. Jyushi laughed as he quickly finished his breakfast and got his dishes to sink, running upstairs. Choro tried to yell after him, to get him to stop running indoors. It wasn't working, since soon Jyushi ran back to downstairs with his baseball gear on.
"Have fun you two," Oso laughed as his younger siblings headed out from the door.
"See ya later, brothers!" Kara smiled, watching as Jyushi waved one last goodbye before disappearing to hallway and out of the door after their gloomy brother, leaving three oldest alone in the apartment.
"Well, I think I'm going to play pachinko and bet on some horses. Choromatsu," of course he asked Choro first, "wanna come with me?"
"No thanks, Oso. I'm going to go to library and get some books to read," Choro asked, shaking his head a bit. Their eldest really needed to get his gambling under control.
"Tsk... Well I'm going alone the- Wait... Karamatsu, do you have money?"
Karamatsu turned to look at his older brother after setting their dishes into sink. He looked at him for a moment before patting his pockets and fishing his wallet out, checking it. There was money, he had saved some in order to buy something for himself. He swallowed, mentally cursing this situation.
"Sorry, dear brother, I got only got few coins," Karamatsu explained as he started to put his wallet back to his pocket, but was interrupted by a hand that reached for it and took it. He looked up, when did has brother walked up so close? He hadn't heard or seen him move. He felt uneasiness settle in his stomach and make a nest for anxiety and fear. He had lied, and now he was going to be punished for it. What a sinful man he was.
"Oi oi oi, Karamatsu, you got more than enough here for your older brother to spend!" Osomatsu laughed as he counted the money, taking most of it and leaving enough for Kara to buy some snacks for them later. Kara wanted to speak up; it was his money after all! He had earned it by helping around the house and saved up. This was unfair ever from his beloved brother.
"I--- C-Can you give them back, please, brother?" He managed to ask, stuttering. Both of his brothers; Choro and Oso turned to look at him, the red one starting to laugh after a short pause.
"Oh man, Kara, you're priceless. As if I'm going to give you this back. Tell you what, if I win something today, you get your money back... Maybe," the red one snickered, starting to put the money into his own wallet. The blue Matsu felt something rise up to his throat, it burned and filled his mind. It was anger and he was scared.
"G-Give me my money back, Osomatsu!" he commanded louder than he intended to, trying to control his boiling self. He didn't want to get angry, he didn't want to shout and order people around. It didn't feel right.
"... Karamatsu," Oso sighed heavily, his voice heavy. "Which one of us is the older one again?"
There was silence, Karamatsu looking down at the floor in shame. Or at least, he felt ashamed, but what for he didn't know. "Y-You are, Osomatsu," he eventually answered. He gasped as he felt a tight grip on his wrist and his hand was pulled up to their head levels. Osomatsu was holding it tightly, way too tightly, and it felt like he was forcing Kara to look up only to meet his brother's upset, angry face. Every bit of his earlier emotions escaped his body, and the nest in his stomach got bigger.
"Don't you dare to rise your voice and tell me what to do ever again, you got that?" the red Matsu hissed, twisting Kara's wrist in his hand a bit. Kara bit his lower lip in pain.
"I think that's enough, Osomatsu!" Choromatsu finally stood up. Maybe he was the actual second oldest after all?
Osomatsu stared his blue, scared brother down a moment longer before letting go and letting out his usual, light and warm laugh, rubbing the spot under his nose with his index finger.
"Just joking! See ya guys later," he said as he left the room and out of the house, letting the awkward silence fell on top of the two remaining twins.
Choromatsu sighed as he walked up to sink to get some water.
"You should've just told him that you needed the cash, Karamatsu. I'm sure he would've understood," the green one explained, trying to keep his eyes off from his blue brother who still stood there like a deer in headlights.
A pat on his shoulder pulled him back to reality.
"Come on, let's go to library and café, Kara," Choro suggested, leaving the kitchen.
Karamatsu stared after him for a moment before looking down at his hands, they were shaking.
The pale skin on his right wrist was already starting to turn blue.