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“Ugh i’m so tired” said San, collapsing on the window seat of their car, Yunho, Mingi and Wooyoung climbing on the other seats.
“We’ll be home in 30 minutes guys, so you can rest a bit” announced the staff member that was driving the car, waiting for the other’s vehicle with the other members to start.
Wooyoung was in the front seat, which was a bit weird for him, since he always liked to sit on the middle seat in the back so he could rest his head on San, who always sat in the left seat.
What was even weirder was that they had been in the car for at least 15 minutes, and he hadn’t said one word, but the others were too tired to think into it, he had to be very tired too, right?
The thing is that Wooyoung never got tired so easily,
but he was already tired of the feeling that was creeping inside of him.
Another 15 minutes passed when they finally reached the shared living room of their dorm, not one word was yet spoken by wooyoung.
Right after crossing the door, everyone was collapsing on the couches, laying on the floor, taking out their phones to order some food, everyone except Wooyoung.
Wooyoung, after getting inside, rushed, almost tripping on his feet, to his bedroom, and closed the bedroom door with a loud shut.
The members looked at each other with worry on their faces, did something happen they didn’t know about?
“Do you guys know something? did he tell you if something bad happened? San?” Hongjoong was talking fast, always the first to worry about his members as a good leader should;
“He hasn’t said anything to me,he actually didn’t talk on the whole ride…I’m going to him-“ he was cut harshly by Seonghwa, who hadn’t talked until that moment, because he had quite an idea of what made woo so upset to just shut down like that.
“I think i know what’s up, and you’re probably the last person he wants to see right now.
Sorry Sannie, but it’s better if I’m the one who goes to him now” and he walked hurriedly towards Wooyoung’s room.
San’s expression changed, guilt starting to enter his gut, even though he didn’t really understand what he did.
“I...what did I do?…” he searched for the members, who were already looking at him
“I don’t-“
“BUT WHY SO MUCH?”
a pause.
everyone turned their heads towards Wooyoung’s room, and San realised.
“I think you know” said Hongjoong, with worry in his words.
“But I didn’t- he knows I was joking, he should know-“ a small tear ran down his face, and he stopped talking, because this was Jung Wooyoung, who had to tattoo “I am never alone and I never will be” to start to believe it a little, and now San ruined everything, and Woo probably thought that he didn’t love him anymore.
Yunho put his hand on San’s back, starting to do circle movements to calm him down, it didn’t really work, but San appreciated it.
“San, you two should talk, you need to talk to him before he gets his ideas” said Mingi, hurrying too for the both of them.
~
“Shh honey it’s okay, please calm down” Seonghwa talked softly, holding Woo, who was crying his heart out.
“He doesn’t love me anymore does he? I thought I was his, I thought I was the most important person of his life, but it’s not true.
Why can’t I be loveable? Why does no one really love me? Everyone hates me, I’m so stupid I believed I actually found people who loved me”
Wooyoung was talking between tears, his voice strained from sobbing so hard and screaming, he felt like throwing up.
“Youngie stop. stop saying that. everyone loves you.
Every single one of us does, San too, he loves you the most.
You two really need to talk, but please try to calm down honey”
~
On the opposite couch, Yeosang was staring at the floor.
It was his fault.
Everything was his fault.
He was the one San made the continuous comments about, he was the one who didn’t say anything about them.
Jongho, who was sitting next to him, noticed.
He always did.
He slowly put a hand on his hyung’s leg, reaching for his hand and holding it, making Yeosang wake up from his trance.
“Sangie, i know what you’re thinking, but it’s not your fault. it’s really not.” and he pressed a small but firm kiss on his cheek, a bit too close to his lips to seem casual.
Yeosang turned his head and smiled a bit.
Maybe it really wasn’t his fault, but two of his best friends were crying,
and he couldn’t do anything about it.
“That’s it, i’m going to talk to him” San said, and before anyone could stop him, he launched himself off the couch and ran to Wooyoung’s bedroom.
~
San climbed the stairs towards Woo’s room, and as he got closer he could hear the muffled crying and Seonghwa’s soft voice speaking.
He was in front of the door now, his heart beating fast and anxiety making its way in his whole body.
What if Wooyoung didn’t forgive him?
but he didn’t have much time to think now, so he just knocked the door twice, waiting for someone to open it.
“Wait Woo, i’ll se who it is” said Seonghwa calmly.
Wooyoung raised his face from Seonghwa’s lap and looked at him with heavy eyes “it’s San, i recognized from the knocking”.
Seonghwa examined his eyes and understood that he was ready to talk to him, so he got up and opened the door, offering a small smile to San, before walking his way downstairs
“Woo…” San said as he entered the room and closed the door, tears already forming in his eyes as he saw the state of his boyfriend.
“Why San-ah? why? i just want to know why you don’t love me anym-“
he was immediately stopped by San, who was in disbelief.
How could he think such a thing? San not loving Wooyoung? It was crazy.
“Woo, listen to me” he sat on the bed and took his boyfriend’s hands in his and continued to talk.
“I could never, ever, not in a million years, stop loving you. There is not one world where i’m not in love with you.
And I am so, so sorry about the thing with Yeosang, I didn’t want it to get this far, and I obviously didn’t think it could hurt you so much, either way I wouldn’t have said a word.
I love you Wooyoung, do you understand me? because I do, with all my heart.”
Wooyoung was crying now, the words going straight to his heart, his San was so pure, he was an asshole for thinking he would leave him, but was he so wrong? San knew everything about him, so it was okay for him to get a little hurt, right?
But he obviously forgives him, he didn’t do it on purpose and it showed.
“It’s okay Sannie, I’m not mad anymore, my mind was just blurred before, and I love you too, so much”
San got closer to him and wrapped him in the tightest hug, kissing his forehead and wiping the tears from his face.
“You’re so beautiful Young-ah, even when you cry”.