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As I sit here and reread the post on your blog I can’t stop the tears, memories flashing of when I found out about you. I was seven and my first song was Helena but then it was Famous Last Words.
When you guys took your four year break I didn’t listen anymore, but in 2009 when Desolation Row was made I found it on Music on Demand and I listened until it went off of the MOD. In 2010 when Sing was on the radio I went back in again but only for a while, it wasn’t until 2011 when I was fully back in, it was the time I needed you guys the most.
I was back in public school again and everything was fine so far. It wasn’t until the half of the school year. I was slowly becoming depressed and I felt alone, suicidal. I remember in a school meeting where they showed us a bullycide video, this girl told about her story and why she felt this way and suicide but then another video of a boy. I broke down crying. I was sent into the counselor’s office and she talked to me, she made me feel better but it was only a little. Slowly as the school year progressed depression gotten worse, my seizures were coming back and my friends started leaving me, bullying me. I was in the counselor’s office for what seemed like every day.
I remember one day in December when I found out my friend had anorexia. I was afraid of losing her, and I went to school crying, I wound up in the counselor’s office. But it was only the next day when my friend cut off the relationship herself, she said in an email and I went to school. In second period—math—that this boy picked on me for crying I wanted to hit him but I couldn’t so I stormed out of the classroom and went to the bathroom. I threw my stuff to the floor because I was angry and sad; the counselor found me and took me to her office.
Anger welled up inside me and so did sadness, I couldn’t control it and I knew I was going to pop. I wanted to die—I wanted to blow my brains out. I knew there were no guns in my house and I’m still kind of a minor.
I tried to OD, didn’t work.
I tried everything but none of it worked, I turned back to you guys and now that it’s 2013 and your gone you guys crushed my hopes and dreams.
I dreamt of meeting you, I dreamt of being in the crowd singing your lyrics but now you’re gone and never coming back.
Hope your proud of yourselves, the entire fandom is destroyed and you left us with shit.