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The world seems to change entirely when it snows.
Birdie could feel the difference in the air before she even opened her eyes. Cool light from outside shined into the bedroom despite the blinds being shut, and the windows may as well have been open with how cold the room was. Birdie couldn’t feel the cold around her, however, as their body was covered with thick, soft blankets, and she was pressed against her wife, Amelia, who was still asleep, lying on her back with her arm wrapped around Birdie. Their faces were pressed together, and Birdie could hear her lover’s soft breaths as she continued to sleep, her expression as peaceful as the world around them. The two had been together for many years now, inseparable no matter what the world threw at them. This fact was visible even in small moments like these, their limbs tangled together and their bodies so close it was nearly impossible to tell where one ended and the other’s body began.
Birdie slowly opened her eyes, staring at Amelia and reaching their hand up to put it in her hair. The strands were soft beneath Birdie’s fingers as she ran her fingers through it, gently so as to not wake her. She seemed to be at such peace while asleep, her job as a Captain usually leaving her in a stressed state. It was nice to see her so calm, her features entirely relaxed. It was something no one saw. No one except Birdie. Amelia’s body was warm against theirs, and it felt as if the two could stay there together, completely still, for the rest of their lives. There was nowhere to go, as the snow was too heavily piled up on the roads and sidewalks, so there was no obligation to do anything today. Time was still. There was no yesterday, no tomorrow. It was today, and it seemed as if it were always today, and would be today forever.
Amelia eventually began to open her eyes, blinking them a few times before shutting them and stretching out her limbs, finally waking from sleep. She flipped onto her side with a tired groan, her eyes meeting those of her wife. Almost immediately, she pulled her lips back into a soft smile, and before Birdie could truly process it, Amelia’s lips were against hers in a short and sweet kiss that carried the same amount of love as it would if it were any longer.
“Good morning…” Amelia smiled against Birdie’s lips, to which she responded with a soft noise. They were still half asleep, the weather invisible to them yet still having such a profound impact on her mood.
Amelia sat up, the blankets falling off her body. Even she looked much more exhausted than she usually did, likely due to the fact she had just gotten home from a long mission the night before. It was likely that, as a Captain, she hadn’t taken much care of herself during the mission, much to Birdie’s dismay. She didn’t know if that was the case, as the two had wordlessly melted into each other’s arms when Amelia arrived home last night. Separated for months, the two were finally reunited, their hearts fonder than ever before. They hadn’t left their embrace until that moment, Amelia leaning away from Birdie to open the blind next to their bed. The sky was white, and so was the ground and everything else in between.
“Darling… look.”
Birdie lifted her head to get a glimpse of the outside world. The world around them had transformed into a winter wonderland overnight, piles of snow coating rooftops and treetops and the roads, and yet still snow continued to fall from the sky in small, fluffy snowflakes that moved so slowly and yet were gone so quickly, indistinguishable from the millions of others in piles of snow. There was no one outside, no lights on in the homes that surrounded theirs. The world was so perfectly still, yet in motion at the same time. Birdie’s head flopped down on the pillow again, shutting her eyes once more. But Amelia did not follow her. Instead, she continued to stare out the window like a cat watching a particularly interesting bird, her eyes fixated on the world around her. After a bit of not feeling the warmth of Amelia’s body next to theirs, Birdie opened her eyes.
“What are you looking at?” She asked.
Amelia turned her head back, her eyes softer than normal.
“Nothing. I just missed this.” She turned her body away from the window at last, laying back down. “I missed you.”
She climbed into Birdie’s arms, burying her face in their chest and taking a deep breath. She laid there for a few moments, Birdie’s hand once again stroking her hair. Then, Amelia lifted her head, her eyes staring into Birdie’s as she kissed up her neck, kissing her skin as if they had been separated for years, perhaps a lifetime. It had certainly felt that way, and yet, in that moment, with their bodies pressed together, not a thing felt lost. It felt as if they had never been apart. The time in which Amelia was gone had never happened, it seemed. Finally, Amelia’s face found a resting place in the crook of Birdie’s neck, and it stayed there as she breathed in her scent. The scent she had missed for so long was now right in her reach, the person she yearned for all throughout her mission was right there.
“I thought of you all the time.” Amelia sighed. “Every moment, I thought of you. I don’t ever want to do that again… I don’t want to be apart for so long ever again. I love you, my darling.”
Her voice, with its soft British accent, was the only sound in the bedroom. The bedside lamp was still on from the night before, and its warm light shone on Amelia’s face. She looked like the sun, her eyes and skin glowing in the lamp’s dim light. She was beautiful. Soon, Birdie found her lips against Amelia’s, the two lost in a sleepy yet desperate kiss, as if they would never see each other again. Amelia’s arms moved to wrap loosely around Birdie’s neck as their hands grabbed her hips, holding each other close and hoping to never let go. The two lovers were lost in each other’s touch, to put it plainly, as they lazily kissed for what felt like hours.
Yet, after just a few minutes, they parted, opting to simply lay next to each other. They were at peace, shutting their eyes and cuddling close to each other. The world around them felt dreamlike as Birdie drifted off into a state that was not quite sleep, yet wasn’t full consciousness. It was somewhere in between, that blissful state in which one’s mind stops yet they are still aware of their surroundings: in Birdie’s case, the warmth of Amelia and the feeling of her arms around her. It felt as if this was existence, and it would stretch on forever this way. Again, the world seems to change entirely when it snows, with no yesterday or tomorrow, only now.
This peace was disturbed as Birdie felt Amelia’s warmth leave her as she sat up.
“Alright, come on now. Let’s at least go to the couch so we can feel like we did something…”
Birdie opened one eye and gave her wife a disapproving look, but Amelia was having none of it today. She crawled out of bed before standing on two feet, reaching back onto the bed to grab Birdie and carry them in her arms. She was strong, though this strength wasn’t surprising as she was in the Navy, and a Captain at that. She picked up Birdie’s body, blankets still wrapped tightly around her, and carried her out to the living room. Birdie’s eyes remained shut as she was gently set down on the sofa, the soft cushion sinking down as they were set on it. Amelia moved a pillow to prop up their head ever so slightly so that she was comfortable before walking away.
As Birdie laid on the couch, she had no idea what Amelia was up to on the kitchen next to her, hearing the sounds of kitchenware as Amelia presumably moved around the room. What she was doing, Birdie had no clue, but they kept their eyes shut, still half asleep. The warmth from bed and the scent of Amelia’s clothing lingered on Birdie, and she began to drift off into sleep before being awoken once more.
“Love…” Birdie felt a kiss on their cheek as Amelia sat on the couch next to her. “Sit up.”
With a little grunt, Birdie pulled herself into a sitting position on the couch, opening her eyes to be greeted with the sight of a mug full of hot chocolate. They sat up, taking the warm ceramic mug into her hands, its heat a welcome contrast from the cold house. The mug was technically Amelia’s; it was a birthday gift from Birdie, and it had a ginger cat on it with the text “You’re a purr-fect wife!” engraved on it.
“Let it cool for a little, it’s still hot. I don’t want you burning your tongue.” Amelia gave her a small smile, getting under the blankets while carefully holding her own mug.
The two were together again, their bodies pressed together as Amelia reached for the television remote. Clicking the buttons on the remote, Amelia navigated the controls on the television, turning on a channel that was currently playing reruns of old, cozy, animated movies, ones that reminded the two of their childhoods. Birdie took a sip of the hot chocolate handed to her earlier, the marshmallows mostly melted on the surface, adding a creamy texture to the already perfect hot chocolate. The temperature was perfect. Everything was perfect. Though tired, Birdie was at peace, her lover by her side, watching movies and drinking hot chocolate together as snow continued to fall outside. She dozed off a few times during the hours they spent watching movies together and woke up to the feeling of Amelia’s lips on their cheek, gently waking them from their sleep. Snow continued to fall from the sky, yet time seemed to stay still.
There is nothing that feels more like heaven than the gentle, mindless touch of a lover. Birdie could feel Amelia’s arm wrapped around her waist, unconsciously trailing her fingers up and down their side. Birdie had her head resting against her shoulder, close enough to Amelia’s face for her to crane her neck down and give her occasional kisses, gentle like a snowflake landing on their skin. There were millions of words spoken through those gentle touches they shared together that afternoon, cuddled up together on the couch as if they were the only ones in the whole world.
After hours of simply cuddling together and watching old movies, Amelia stood up from the couch, grabbing both of their empty mugs and bringing them into the kitchen. Though Birdie dreaded the loss of her lover’s warmth, they knew she would come back soon.
“Mmm… love?”
“Yes?” Amelia’s voice, so smooth and calm, called out to Birdie.
“Do we have any cookies?”
They heard the sounds of the old pantry door opening before it shut just moments later.
“No… we can make some.” Amelia turned around, smiling. “C’mere.”
Birdie stood up from the couch, walking the short distance from there to the kitchen counter, taking a seat at it as Amelia gathered ingredients from the pantry. Bags of flour, sugar, and chocolate chips piled up as Birdie grabbed a bowl, setting it on the counter. Amelia grabbed their recipe book, one they started on their wedding night and have been continuing since. In the pages, which were beginning to yellow on the ends due to years of use, was Birdie’s favourite chocolate chip cookie recipe. They were just the perfect amount of sweetness that left them wanting more, and Amelia would always make them whenever they had a bad day. Amelia took a seat next to her at the counter, opening the recipe book to the specific page and beginning to measure out ingredients. The sound of old movies playing on the television provided some comforting background noise as the two began to mix ingredients together, spilling flour all over the counter in their attempts to measure the perfect amount. As they did so, Birdie glanced out the window, watching as the snow continued to fall at a steady pace. At this rate, the snow would be a foot high by nighttime.
“When do you think the snow will stop?” She asked, turning back to look at Amelia.
“Mmm… I don’t know. The weatherman said it should stop around 8, but he has no clue what he’s talking about most of the time.” She gave a little chuckle before her voice softened. “I hope it keeps snowing into tomorrow so you don’t have to go to work.”
Birdie gave a little laugh at that, yet the idea was appealing. Spending another day at home with Amelia, nothing to do, sounded like heaven, and she would give anything in the world to spend another day like this one. One glance at the clock showed that it was 3:45 in the afternoon, and they wondered where the day had gone. It seemed as if just a few moments ago it was 9 in the morning, and she was fading in and out of sleep, cuddled up next to Amelia, safe and sound. Amelia didn’t seem to notice this seemingly quick passage of time, instead measuring out chocolate chips in measuring cups.
“No, no, don’t measure them.” Birdie insisted, taking the bag from Amelia’s hands. Amelia met her with no resistance, letting them take the bag from her hands.
“Do you… plan on dumping the entire bag in?”
“No, but you have to measure them with your heart. You determine how much is the right amount. Here, look.”
Birdie took the bag of chocolate chips and began to pour it into the bowl, spilling them in until they accidentally lost control of the bag and ended up emptying the entire bag in the dough. With a quick glance to Amelia’s eyes, she began to laugh, Amelia following shortly after. It was moments like these Amelia lived for, fought to get home for. It was moments like these that made her want to quit her job as a captain entirely and retire for a life like this with Birdie, made her want to spend every moment for the rest of her life this way. It was moments like these in which she fell deeper in love with Birdie than she could have ever imagined.
Before they knew it, the cookie dough was in small balls on a cookie sheet, being put in the oven to bake. The smell of them baking quickly filled the warm home as the sun began to set, the snowy sky beginning to darken. The warm overhead lighting gave the kitchen a homey, sentimental feel. Amelia walked over to the old record player they kept on the kitchen counter. She liked to have music playing when she cooked, and it was a wonder why it wasn’t playing already. She scanned a few records before her eyes landed on a particular one. She pulled it out of its case before carefully placing it in the record player, lowering the needle gently.
As soon as the music began to play, Birdie’s head shot up, recognising the song immediately. Of course they recognised it; it played at their wedding. “Bug Black Car” by Gregory Alan Isakov. The song that, no matter what, always reminded them of Amelia. She still remembers that first dance together. The day seemed to come back to Birdie as the music began to play, and they got off their seat at the counter to move into their wheelchair. The gentle strums of guitar were like heaven to her ears.
As Isakov began to sing, Amelia took Birdie’s hands in hers, pulling them close to her. Birdie couldn’t stop the wide, goofy grin that spread on her face when Amelia gave them that signature smile that was nothing but loving. Pure adoration in such a simple gesture. Isakov’s soft, quiet voice was the only sound in the room as the two dance. Amelia spun Birdie around in their wheelchair, held her hands so carefully as if they were they most precious things in the world.
There were many years to come, they realised. For the rest of their foreseeable lives, they would be able to do this together. Simply existing and being in the presence of each other’s love. Day after day. Year after year. And maybe, hopefully, lifetime after lifetime. Where they ended up didn’t matter so long as they found each other again and again.
Amelia took Birdie’s face in her hands, leaned down, and planted a soft, loving kiss on her lips. The house was warm and safe, Birdie was warm and safe under Amelia’s gentle touch. Snow continued to fall outside.
“Just me and all of my plain Jane glory…”