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Hoth was cold, cold as ice. But not all the time. Sometimes it was warm, sometimes it was downright hot! Or maybe that was just to Sabine?
I could go and read your mind,
Think about your dumb face all the time.
Living in your glass house, I'm outside.
Sabine sat in the common rec area in the back of the base. Sometimes people would hang out there to relax when they were off duty or just needed some time to be alone. The walls were all ice, white and boring, it would drag on Sabine's nerves. But you can't paint in frozen water. She wished she had water color. Wait, would that work? Ugh, she needed a distraction! The only others in the room right now were starting to annoy her. Did they not see her? Were they pretending to ignore her? It pisses her off. She felt herself getting hot. What were they doing, what was he thinking? Damn you, Ezra Bridger.
On the other side of the large room on a beat up yet still somewhat comfy couch, compared to the other hard and stiff sitting arrangements on base, Ezra sat talking and laughing and sitting close to one of their friends they had made since coming to Hoth. Her name was Vio, she was a med assistant and she had gotten into a lot of fun and mischief with Sabine and Ezra, she was one of the few others on base who was their age, and so they all gravitated towards each other. But right now Vio was gravitating dangerously close to Ezra, and Sabine didn't like it.
Looking into big blue eyes,
Did it just to hurt me, make me cry.
Smiling through it all, yeah, that's my life.
Sabine didn't like the way they were looking at each other. The way Ezra leaned in when Vio spoke or the way she put her hand on him when he laughed out loud. Ezra suddenly caught a glance of Sabine out of the corner of his eye and gave her one of his classic big goofy grins, his big blue eyes sparkled like they were just for her. Sabine just groaned internally and rolled her eyes at the poor attempt at flirting, she was not in the mood. Vio glanced over too and gave Sabine a slight smirk and wink before they both turned back to each other. Sabine's heart froze. What was that, what did that mean? She frowned, she didn't like it, it felt like a threat. The anger grew in her stomach, what was this burning uncomfortable feeling? It was starting to hurt. She didn't like that either.
You're an idiot, now I'm sure.
Now I'm positive, I should go and warn her.
Stupid Ezra, Sabine thought to herself as she watched Vio get up and go over to the refreshments area where drinks and ration snacks generally were. She went to go get them both something to drink. She was giving him these eyes, why did they look so seductive? Ezra just gave her a flashy smile and a childish laugh. Sabine began to scowl. She didn't like this. He was hers! Wait, she paused. Did she really just think that.....?
Ooh, bet you're thinking, "She's so cool."
Kicking back on your couch, making eyes from across the room.
Wait, I think I've been there too.
Suddenly Sabine flashed back, to a time when they were younger, still having adventures on the Ghost before ever being a part of the rebellion. They were both sitting in the common area on the couch by the dejarik table. They were alone, talking and laughing. About what exactly she didn't remember. She playfully slapped Ezra on the back and he cried out in pain. Sabine froze, the hit wasn't hard and Ezra wasn't acting like he was playing around. He was hurt. He was hiding an injury, again! Feeling frantic, Sabine began to try and take off Ezra's top, he freaked out and tried to stop her from doing it. Finally she forced him to do it and he gave in, letting her pull it off so she could examine the injury. Sure enough he had an old blaster wound that was looking like the skin was burnt and painful. Sabine frowned and her heart sank as she looked him over and saw a lifetime of scars and wounds from old injuries never healed properly. Was Ezra feeling ashamed for her to see them, to see that side of him? She let out a sad sigh and placed her hands on his shoulders in quiet support. Ezra flinched slightly at the sudden and gentle comfort, and he finally allowed himself to relax and sink into the moment together, realizing it meant more to him than it did to her.
Back in reality Sabine saw Vio sitting next to Ezra again, a drink in both of their hands. Ezra was laughing and looking flush. Was he blushing or was he drunk? ....or both? Since 98% of the rebels were all adults, any alcohol they had was available without concern. But right now, Sabine felt concerned. Was Vio trying to get Ezra drunk? Why? She froze as she saw Vio reach over and begin to take off Ezra's shirt. She tensed when she realized Ezra didn't flinch or fight back, he was letting her do it. Sabine couldn't breathe. Were they about to do what she was thinking they were about to do? Right in front of her? Kriffing kriffers!
What'd she do to get you off?
Taking down her hair like, oh my gods
Taking off your shirt, I did that once....
Sabine bit her lip in thought.....
Or twice.
She began to shake, her very core trembling. She couldn't understand. Was this happening for real right in front of her eyes? Why was Ezra doing this? And why was he doing it with Vio? Wait, who was the player and who was the game? Was Vio making a move on Ezra? Was Ezra trying to flirt with Vio since he was so touch starved? Sabine began to feel tears burning behind her eyes. Was this her fault? He should be doing this with her!
No, I know, I know I'll kriff off.
But I think I like her, she's so fun.
Wait, I think I hate her, I'm not that evolved.
Sabine began to feel defeated. She was friends with Vio, she was friends with Ezra. But is that all they were? She liked them both, but were they good together? Sure. But Ezra was much better with herself. That's the way it should be! This was wrong, so wrong! She had to stop it. So why couldn't she move? Was it already too late?
I'm sorry she's missing it, sad, sad boy.
Not my business, but I had to warn ya.
Suddenly the world around her froze. She felt it. Something within herself snapped. She couldn't breathe, couldn't move, was her heart even still beating? Was that what snapped, what broke? Her heart?
Ooh, you've got me thinking, "She's so cool."
But I know what I know, and you're just another dude.
Ooh, that's so true.
Then the fire came. The frigid temperature of Hoth was gone. She was hot, blazing, like the fires of hell. Her life began to flash before her eyes, her bloodshot tear filled eyes. Was this what it was like to die? Is this how the great Mandalorian warrior dies, of a broken heart? But there was something about the memories. There was nothing from her life on Krownest, nothing of her family, not even anything from the rest of her Ghost family. Everything was of Ezra..... It was him, he was her life. She knew that now, she could see it all too late. All those playful attempts he made on her that she ignored, now she was paying the price, a life full of regret. Suddenly she felt her frozen heart beat and she gasped for air as she returned to reality, seeing topless Ezra sitting on the couch across the room with Vio. Sabine frowned. No, that was her topless Ezra. She finally found the strength, the burning desire within her, she stood up angrily. She had to take back what was hers.
Made it out alive, but I think I lost it.
Said that I was fine, said it from the coffin.
Remember how I died when you started walking?
That's my life, that's my life.
I'll put up a fight, putting on my helmet,
Don't you know the vibe? Don't you know the feeling?
You should spend the night, catch me on your ceiling.
That's your prize, that's your prize,
Well.....
Sabine stopped. She had only made it half way across the room, her mind and emotions had consumed her thoughts and she had totally missed her surroundings. She saw Vio and Ezra, completely oblivious to her and the inner turmoil she had been battling. Sabine opened her eyes to reality and saw what was in front of her.
Ezra was whining pitifully as Vio was stitching up a wound on his shoulder. Sabine blinked in shock. She had no idea he was injured, but then again, he was classic at hiding them. Vio was grumbling at Ezra about his complaining and ignoring his injury and letting it get infected. She sprayed it with some medicine and Ezra cried out dramatically. Sabine almost started laughing at the pathetic sight. Vio went back to stitching him up and growling at him to hold still, Ezra continued to whimper and squirm at each needle poke on his skin. Sabine chuckled to herself. Her Ezra was such a baby. But he was still her baby. She realized Vio was not a threat, she was not making moves, she was just trying to treat her difficult patient. As Vio finished she looked up and finally noticed Sabine.
"This guy, I tell ya." She smiled and chuckled.
"Oh please." Sabine rolled her eyes, feeling her shoulders relax. "You haven't seen anything! You have no idea what I had to put up with, all of his injuries and illnesses on the Ghost. Good luck trying to treat him, better luck if you even find out he's hiding something."
"For real." Vio scoffed and sat up once she finished stitching. "Do you have any idea how long he's been hiding this?" She glared at Ezra. "Hmm?" She slapped him on the injury.
"Owwwww, stop!" Ezra complained loudly, partly him being a baby, partly him being drunk.
"Trying to make friends with a wild blue furred ice Tooka and it didn't go so well. You should've seen him diving face first into snow dunes." Vio rolled her eyes and stood up. "Well Bine, I leave him in your care." She patted her on the shoulder and turned to go. "Good luck."
Sabine watched her leave and smiled. Ezra continued to moan and groan huddled on the couch. Sabine chuckled to herself and finally sat down next to him. The fire within her was put out, but she felt a different kind of warmth now next to Ezra. After all this time, such a long, long time, she finally knew why.
"You really are pathetic." She rubbed her hand through Ezra's hair, happy it was growing back out again. She missed it. She missed this. Ezra closed his eyes and leaned his head back with a whimper. She smiled, "But I guess that's just one of the many reasons why I love you."
The room froze. Ezra snapped open his eyes, his big beautiful blue eyes. He looked up at Sabine and she smiled back at him. Ezra blinked a few times, making sure this was not a dream.
"I must really be drunk." He finally spoke up in shock, his voice barely above a whisper. "Did you just say you loved me?"
"I did. Because I do."
Ezra began to breathe hard, his own heart pounding in his chest. This was real, this was finally happening. He sat up and they both looked into each other's eyes.
"Sabine, I....."
"I'm sorry it took so long." She admitted quietly.
Ezra smiled softly, "Better late than never."
Sabine laughed, "That's so true."
Mmm, bet you're thinking, "She's so cool."
Kicking back on your couch, making eyes from across the room.
Wait, I think I've been there too, uhh.
Ooh, you've got me thinking, "He's so cool."
But I know what I know, and you're not just another dude.
Ooh, that's so true, ooh, oh.