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Chapter Text

Octavia was staring outside of her room, reading a book. But she looked outside somberly. "Don't worry, dad... I'll prove it's all possible to everyone."

"You okay?" A voice asked, making Octavia jolt up slightly, she looked up to see Loona.

"Oh. Sorry... I was just looking outside."

"Yeah, I saw. I was just standing over there." Loona explained, pointing to the doorway

"Sorry. I got worked up after finally opening this place. Dad told me he believes in my ideas, he said that mum does too. I'm just not sure..." Octavia explained.

"I know." Loona sits down next to her sister. "Don't worry. I really believe in you."

"I know you do..." Octavia replied, looking away from Loona, but she smiled, and tried to hide it. "And thanks..."

"Hey, I will do anything for you." Loona said, standing up again. "Alright, come on. Blitz said that he has something to show us." She began to walk out of the room.

Octavia watched Loona leave, a loud bell rang throughout the city, and she turns to the Bell Tower at Heaven Embassy. She looks on with sadness, knowing that it's another year before the Extermination comes again.

"I have to do this." She whispered to herself, and went to walk out as well.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Angel was holding a black and red crossbow in his hands. In front of him is a picture of a smiling family: a father, a mother, a baby and two children. His arms are shaking really badly.

"Angel, stop shaking!" His partner, Husk, said. "You're gonna shoot our only receptionist!" He pointed to the couch.

Vaggie was laying on a gray couch, while holding up the family picture in one hand and her phone in the other. And she looked deadpanned.

"Wow. I feel soooo loved here you know." She said, rolling her eyes.

"Just take a deep breath," Husk inhaled to make it more cooler. "and let it all out!" He exhaled, and smiled at his partner.

"But... I-it's a family! Under what circumstances would we ever need to kill a human family?.." Angel asked, trying to make his case and point.

"I mean, if that's what the client wants." Husk just shrugged.

"Maybe like a shitty dad." Angel scratched his head. "Or a mob family." He does the 'italian hand motion', and he speaks with an Italian accent. "That's understandable." He starts to speak normally again. "But to eradicate an entire innocent- well, seemingly innocent- upper middle class family bloodline?.."

While Angel was talking, Vaggie looked at the the picture as she thinks for a moment. Then she looks back to the two.

"Hey! You don't know they're innocent!" She, only kind of, yelled, and she pointed to the boy in the picture. "This kid probably sets dogs on fire," Then she points to the girl. "maybe this girl gets off to bullying Australian kids online," And finally, she points to the father. "and this guy... This guy definetly jerks off to the worst stuff."

Husk had his eyes closed, and nodded in agreement to what Vaggie told. "Exactly!" He opened his eyes and looked at Angel. "Humans are full of secret nasties. It's why so many of them end up here." He puts a hand onto his shoulder.

"But-"

"Guilty and innocent aren't our business, Angie." He said and he cups Angel's cheeks as he shakes them. "Killin' who we're paid to is our business. Shoot the target now." He gave Angel's cheek a little kiss.

Angel aims his crossbow back at the picture. "I just think it's a bit excessive, and we could be a bit more selective, is all." He was barges into the room followed by Mrs. Mayberry.

"I want you all to meet-"

A startled Angel accidentally fires his arrow and it ricochets around the room. Husk jumps into Angel's arms as the arrow hits a computer. The arrow then flies and creates a hole in the family picture that a stunned Vaggie is holding. The arrow then hits the bottom of a tank with eels and the tank starts to wobble dangerously. The arrow flies towards Mrs. Mayberry, but Alastor catches it with one hand, with a smile.

"... Our newest client!"

The eel tank falls down. Glass and water spill onto the floor. The eels fall out and bursts into electricity, setting the room on fire.

"Oh for fucks sake, Angel Dust! I just bought those eels!"

Outside the building, imp firefighters carry the eels away and head into a red fire truck. Mrs. Mayberry drives off in a yellow taxi cab as Alastor akwardly waves goodbye.

"Byyyyye! And, don't worry, we'll get that skank in less than twenty-four hours or your first kill is freee." Alastor said and he waved as the car drives away.

"Since when do we have that deal implemented?" Angel asked.

Alastor turned around to face Angel with a glare.

Alastor began to talk woth a smile on his face. "Since you set fire to my office in front of a" Alastor grabbed Angel by the collar of his shirt and began to yell. "CLIENT, YOU FUCKIN' DIPSHIT!!!" He grabs Angel's face and pushes him away to calm himself down. "I sincerely hope that the book is still intact!"

Vaggie was still typing on her phone. "Ya' mean... Our only ticket to the other side?" She asked, pulling out the book. "Yeah. Got it."

"And that's why you're my favorite." Alastor leaned down to Vaggie, and he started to do a baby talk voice. "You get a tweat, now!" He holds up a biscuit to her.

"Ew. Stop."

Alastor throws the treat into the air and catches it instead. He pulls it into his mouth and chews.

Vaggie looked disgusted, but, she ended up opening the book. "You are so gross!"

Husk was drawing a pentagram with chalk on the wall. It glows red and creates a portal to the human world.

"Awwww, stop it. I get enough of that from my subordinates." Alastor cooed. Vaggie rolled her eyes and left to go back into the office building. Alastor puts his hand on Angel's face, who struggles to walk to Niffty. "Now, let's go lick some ass!"

"The expression is 'kick some ass'..." Husk corrected his boss, and then pointed some finger guns at him. "Al." He snaps her fingers at him as he walks through the portal.

"Mine's a better version." Alastor walked through the portal as well, finally letting go of Angel's face.

The demon just sighed. "Aw, fuuuck..." He went to walk through the portal too.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

"So, what do you think?" Blitzø asked.

On the couch, Octavia and Loona were suprised, he made a commercial for them, but it was super offensive rather than inviting.

"I'm sorry. What the fuck was that, Blitz?!" Loona asked angrily.

"Uh, Yeah. One note about it. I mean, thank you for making this..." Octavia began. "But um, maybe the tone is a bit... Off?.. We want people to want to come here. This makes us look... Uhm..."

"Bad. The word you're looking for is bad." Loona completed Octavia's sentence for her, crossing her arms.

"Funny. I wanted it to be hilarious." Blitz explained.

"It didn't explain ANYTHING about how we're trying to save demons from extermination, which is the whole fucking point." Loona angrily yelled.

"Loona is right Blitz, the commercial was to let sinners know we are trying to help them be redeemed." Octavia declared.

"Well. You two should be happy I didn't try to make it a horny little ad." Blitz said, making hand motions to something sexual. "Those fucker sinners would rampage right into this tacky little shithole." He put one of his elbows onto the TV. "But instrad, you wanted a 'normal' ad."

"Oh really?" Loona growled angrily, standing up from the couch, and she began to walk towards Blitzo. "Do you think that this is a fucking joke?" She asked. "Well, this is not what we want to represent us!" She poked Blitzo's chest, still angry. "When you showed up here a week ago, you told us you would help run this hotel. Instead, you're mocking us like it's a waste of time!" She was about to do slap him, when Octavia ran up to her and put a hand on her shoulder to calm her down. Loona sighed and decided to back off, and she sat down to the couch again.

"Let me guess, he tried to make fun of you?" Another figure, Fizzarolli, asked Loona, leaning down to face her, who nodded, still looking angry.

"You don't know how much I wanna slap him." Loona replied to Fizz.

"As expected of him."

Octavia looked at her sister in arms nervously until jer phone rings, and it was from her father.

"Hold that thought! I'll be right back." She excused herself, and she walked off.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

The three stand infront of a small red house by the lake as the sun sets. Alastor and Angel lean against the side of the house, rising from bushes. Alastor stands up and peers into the window.

"That's gotta be her." He chuckles darkly. "This is gonna be too easy. Angel, do you want this one?"

Angel suddenly lookes pleasantly surprised. "Me?.." He asked.

"Yeaaaah, this one's simple enough for you to handle." Alastor explained.

Angel stands up and peers through the window. His faces falls as he looks at the family having dinner.

"It's just a happy mother who just got out of the hospital." Alastor said the obvious out loud.

Martha and Ralphie affectionately rub each other's noses. Martha holds a dinner platter in her hand.

Angel hesitated at the window because of the sight.

"You snooze, you lose." Alastor said, which made Angel turn to him.

Martha's face is seen in a reflector, her doe eyes wide and blinking innocently.

"Aaaand I've got you now, bitch."

"Wait... Are we actually killing a family?!" Angel asked, stressed.

"Noo. Of course we're not!" Alastor shook his head. "We're just killing the mother!" He corrected Angel. And he positioned his rifle to be ready to shoor. "We're ruining this family!"

"But... Ho- Hold on, hold on! Let's just think about it..." Angel hesitated, and he lifted up Alastor's gun just as he fired at the woman. The bullet not only missed, but it hit a glass mirror inside the house. All four family members gasp in fear.

This caused Alastor to stare into space for a few seconds, he was fuming in THAT much anger. "What the fuck was that, Angel?!" He yelled.

Angel wheezes anxiously, eye twitching. He lets out a croak with his snake-like tongue out. He then falls to his knees, hands over his face. "I'm so sorry! They just seemed so wholesome and happy!.." Tears start to fall from his eyes as he takes more breaths. "I just panicked..."

One of Alastor's eye twitches and he facepalms. "Oh, nobody is innocent, Angel! From the moment of birth, you're already a parasite leeching off your momma's tits!" He leans in and pokes Angel's head. "Get the over yourself already, you"

A blast shoots through the wall and hits Alastor in the arm, blood flying out.

"AAAAH! A new hole! SCATTER!"

Alastor and Husk flee the scene and Angel hides in the bushes. Another hole appears and part of the wall explodes. Ralphie and Martha grin and leap through the large hole with guns drawn. Angel peers out from the bushes and rapidly looks around. A child's hand grabs Angel by his leg and he yelps.

Ralphie fires at Niffty who flips backwards and dives into the lake.

"Where'd you go, little critter?! Y'all can't hide long from me!"

Husk has his head above the water under the dock. A knife is in his mouth. And he breaks through the dock and lands on it, with his knife and a grin. Ralphie swings a glass bottle and Husk runs behind him out of the way. He jumps up in the air, knife in both hands. Ralphie swings his bottle upwards, knocking Husk in the head. He cries out and falls to the ground. He struggles to stand, but collapses onto the dock, unconscious. His eyes twitch. Ralphie smiles evilly down at her as the cloudy sky spirals red.

Angel opens his eyes and gasps with a squeak to find himself tied to a stitched up dead body in a chair. His face falls in fear as he looks at the girl and boy. Both their eyes are red and devious sharp grins form on their faces. And he tries to defuse the situation.

"Oh! Well, hello there, little ones. Ain't ya' two a bunch of cuties?.."

Both kids speak in low creepy tones, the boy finishing seconds after the girl, speaking instantly after Angel.
"It's nice to have a new critter to play with."

Amgel glances up in fear at a red light above him. The light reveals a human head high up and several limbs on plaques. The wooden walls are stained with red blood. Two plaques hold stitched up faces of skin. A larger plaque displays a dead man with long white hair, arms crossed, eyes and teeth bulging out. His upper chest is connected to the plaque. A picture frame made of bones reveals another face made of skin inside it. Human skin is tacked to the wall with 'Bless this mess' stitched onto it. Angel looks and sees a dead human body on a platter in front of him, an apple in the human's mouth. Organs are in a nearby bowl.

"Ohhhhh... Fuck meeee..." Angel whispered to himself.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

The scene comes back to Octavia, and after the phone call, she seemed really happy with the news her father brought to her. "Yeah. Totally! Yeah. I'll head over there right away. Okay?" She told her father, and she hung up the phone happily, and in excitement. "Yes... YES!" She giggles in excitement when she hears about the news until she calls Loona in gibberish, waving very franticly. "LOONA HOLY SHIT!"

Loona jolted up, slightly freaked out. "Ah! What?" She asked, looking concerned.

Octavia waves her to come to her for some exciting news. "Get over here!"

Loona just sighs happily and she walks to Octavia, while she is jumping around in a very happy mode.

"What's going on?" Loona asked.

Octavia breathes in and out to calm herself down so she can explain it all. "My dad just called me, and he said that the leader of the Angel Army wants to meet us. He asked if I could go instead of him."

"But-but, the extermination just happened. What could they want this soon after-" Loona trailed off, but Octavia was in the mood to get her hotel project to work, and remains so hopeful that she even starts singing.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Four gunshots were ringing out in the woods. Alastor dashes through a bush. Martha's evil laughter follows as he runs through the forest. He slides down a hill and catches his breath at the bottom.

"I know you're hurtin', little devil!"

Alastor takes deep breaths as he leans against a tree. His eyes go wide as he covers his mouth. A silhouette of Martha is shown walking through the woods.

"I promise, that I can make that pain go real quick! Just come let Mama Martha put a bullet in your pretty little skull!"

Alastor sighs in relief before his staff starts to yell out "LUCIFER IS CALLING YOU!" Alastor tries to grab hold of the staff, eventually doing so, then he holds it to his ear. "Duckie. This is a really bad time."

"It's always a bad time for you." Lucifer replied to him through his phone.

"What do you want?" Alastor demanded an answer, he was annoyed already, he didn't need another annoyance now. He suddenly hears a rifle clicks. A bullet flies through the tree where Alastor was moments before. A shadow of Martha with red eyes and mouth appears through the hole.

"I can HEAR you, darlin'!"

"Shhhit!" Alastor cursed and he ran away.

"What's going on over there?" Lucifer asked.

"'Oh nothing. Just getting chased by a crazed lunatic lady." Alastor replied.

"You're WHAT?!" Lucifer was now shocked.

"Do not fear, duckie, I will take care of it all." Alastor told him, trying to calm his nerves.

'LUCIFER. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING TO?! IS IT THAT RED WHORE AGAIN?!' A female voice on the other side disturbed their conversation.

"Nobody! I gotta go. Bye!" Lucifer sent a kiss sound to Alastor. "I will explain what I wanted to tell you later." And with that he hung up the phone.

Alastor stared at his staff, before he drops it, because he is pinned to the tree by the butt of Martha's gun.

"Gotcha! So, you're a little devil, huh? Come to drag me and my kin to Hell? Well... NOT TODAY, SATAN!" She presses the gun harder into Alastor. "Gonna send y'all back where ya came from!"

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Octavia has finally gotten to right where she wants to be, the Heaven Embassy with the watchtower. She opens the door to peek inside.

"Hello!" Her voice echoes in the hallways. As she enters through the door and finds the whole embassy deserted. She walks to the front desk to check in. "Hello?.." Her voice echoes again. "Creepy..."

Octavia comes to the front desk with no one but a single bell. She taps the bell to ring it, and at the instant, a golden scroll and feather ink pen floats from above over to her.

"Oh, okay..." She signs the papers. "Also creepy."

The scroll and feather flies up before disappearing. Right then, the twin doors slide open to show Octavia the meeting room, and she enters inside the dark room with no one around.

"Uh...hello? Is anyone here?.." Octavia called out.

The lights suddenly switched on, revealing two angels at the end of the room, with one being a exorcist lieutenant, Lute and the big boss leader of the Angel Army, Adam, who is eating a rib in his hand.

"'Sup!" Adam called out.

"Oh shit!" Octavia yelped. And she immediately fell down after getting surprised by the sudden appearance of two angels in the room. She gets back up and readjusts herself to introduce herself properly. "Oh... Sorry... Hi, I'm Octavia. My dad asked me if I could meet you..."

"Yeah, I know." Adam replied.

"Okay, well..." Octavia began, but all Adam was doing is eating his rib like a buzzsaw. "It's so nice to meet you two..."

"Totally. It's nice to meet you, too." Adam replied, and he reaches over to give Octavia a handshake, and as she was about to shake his hand, her hand slips right through, revealing him to be a hologram, fizzing on and off after being touched, which freaks Octavia out. "Ha! I fucking got you!" Adam turns to Lute. "Did you fucking see that?" He asked, and Lute nods once. "Hah! Good shit."

Octavia was trying to get something straight with Adam being a hologram. "Uh... So... Wait. You aren't here?.."

"Fuck no, you think I'd come down there?" Adam laughed mockingly. "No, I mean, I love the vibe, totally, I love your tunes. Pretty fucking hardcore, don't get me wrong. But! it's such a bummer! man. Everything down there's just so 'eugh', ya know?" He chuckles. "It's all so Ew."

"Right. So, I'm happy we've got this opportunity to meet. There's a project that I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about-" Octavia began, but Adam cut her off.

Adam puts his finger on Octavia's lips to quiet her down for a moment. "Hey, hey, hey, hey, slow down. We've got time. How about we get to know each other a little. Mmm. How about lunch? You hungry? I got you." He takes a plate of ribs he's been eating toward Octavia. "Here's my personal favorite. You'll love it."

"Oh. Uh... Thanks..." Octavia thanked him, and she goes to take a piece of a rib, but her hand passes right through them, also revealing it to be a hologram too.

"I got you again, bitch!" Adam laughed. "Oh, this is fuckin' hilarious!"
Octavia makes a small unamused chuckle alongside Adam's hyper laughter, but it's too clear that she's uncomfortable.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Angel was struggling to free himself from the rope, his hands tied behind his back. He looks up and gasps as he sees fires being lit from outside. A hangman's noose hangs from the wall.

"Husk!" Angel yelled.

Both of the kids stare at Angel with wide evil grins. Angel grunts and struggles again. He notices the girl pull out a sharp knife. He looks at the blade and then glares with determination. The girl raises the knife but Angel pushes the chair backwards, knocking her to the ground. He frees himself with the knife. A silhouette of Angel appears as he breaks through the window, holding his gun. A 'Live, Laugh, Love,' sign hangs from inside the room. He races outside through the forest, where red symbols hang from tree branches. There are torches in rows and tents.

Husk and Alastor are tied to a stake decorated with spikes at the top. Ralphie laughs as he pours gasoline on the ground under their feet. Nearby, a grinning Martha holds a torch in her left hand.

"I had that fucking shot. God dammit, Angel!" Alastor cursed Angel, who he knew was not there yet, out loud.

"Satan! We return your FILTHY creatures back to the pits of Hell!" Martha said her mantra. And she rises her torch as Alastor and Husk struggle to free themselves.

"May the root of evil remain honored as we continue thy WORK!" Martha grunts as she tosses the torch to the ground, where it lands under Alastor and Husk. Evil laughter from Martha follows after all of that.

The flames rise up around Alastor and Husk, but they remain unharmed.

"Yeah, that's not exactly how it works, lady. Sorry, your fire doesn't really hurt us anymore." Alastor explained, with a mocking smile. Husk just kind of, smirked, at what Alastor said. Martha stares at the two in confusion.

"Oh. Shit." Martha curses, and she rolls her eyes. "Well... I'll just shoot you in your smart-ass mouth!" She grins and pulls out her rifle.

"That would be more effective." Alastor replied.

"Alastor!" Husk yelled angrily.

Martha laughs evilly again as she aims her rifle at the demons. Both sinners close their eyes and flinch. Martha then yelps as a gunshot is heard. Martha's eye flies from her socket and she collapses to the ground. It was Angel, holding his gun.

"Angel!" Husk called out happily. Angel quickly runs over and unties the rope, freeing both of his colleagues.

"You're so not gettin' your paycheck for this one." Alastor said, before he fell down. Angel and Husk smile at each other and embrace. They both move their heads. Ralphie trips backwards on Martha's body before fleeing the scene.

"Oh, yeah, thanks! I'm alright!" Alastor sarcastically remarked. Which caused Angel to hurry and help Alastor up and supports him.

"I'm sorry." Angel apologized to his boss.

"Apology accepted." Alastor bowed, but he looked straight into Angel's eyes. "But do that again, and it won't end so good for you." He stands up properly and he pulls out his staff again. "Now that the job is done, let's go home."

"Ehhhh, yeah. Give me a moment. I need to get something I left at the house." Angel excused himself.

"Okay, fine. But, hurry up." Alastor told Angel before he spoke into his staff. "Vaaaagieee. We're ready to come home, dear!" He said.

Angel runs through the woods with a determined look on his face.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Back with Octavia's meeting with Adam, she's looked bored, propping herself on her elbows while listening to Adam exaggeratingly boasting about himself and his sex life.

"So, I was playin' this gig, and for some fuckin' reason, this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer, and it's like, 'do you know who I am? I'm fuckin' Adam. I'm the original dick!'" He says, pointing to his genitals down the table. "All dicks descend from me. You think you want drummer dick?" He turns to Lute, who shakes her head. "No way! I'm the Dick-fuckin' master!" He eats a mouthful of ribs sloppily. "So, anyway, then we fucked, and it was awesome. What'd you do this weekend?.." He asked Octavia.

"Wait, your name is Adam?" Octavia asked. "Like the first man Adam?.. That means you... Oh..." Octavia puts the pieces together. "That explains so much."

"I know. I fucking rock." Adam comimented himself as he holds up his hand in the sign of the horns.

Octavia brushes off the awkwardness from Adam and gets to her subject of matter in hand. "Well, Adam, sir. Mr. Adam, sir."

"Call me, Dickmaster." Adam told Octavia, with a smirk on his face.

"Adam." Octavia refused to call him that. "You seem like a smart-" She said, but she paused. "...well, stand up guy."

Adam was beginning to start picking his teeth. "Uh-huh."

"And I know you are the leader of the angels. And you are a big thinker, a revolutionary. A- A genius!" Octavia complimented Adam, just to get to her subject.

"I mean, your words, babe."

"Who would really love to put his name on something so cool." Octavia explained.

"I fucking love putting my name on some cool shit! Some cool shit is the best thing!" Adam replied.

"It's a solution to our biggest problem of all time!" Octavia said.

"Oh, herpes. Yeah, that's a bitch." Adam nodded.

"No! Our... OTHER biggest problem." Octavia corrected him.

"Oh...uh... Ugly people? Math? Global Warming?" Adam asked her. "Nah, wait, that's Earth's problem." He corrected himself.

Octavia stares at Adam with deadpan annoyance at how ignorant he is.

"Ummm..."

_________________________
Meanwhile.

The two kids being lifted into their father's arms in the corner of the house. Angel points his rifle at them. The girl and boy look scared and the girl has a teddy bear with her.

"Don't move!" Angel ordered them, glaring at the three of them.

"What are you gonna do little guy? Kill us?" The human man asks Angel.

"Maybe I should!" Angel replied. "You people are monsters!" He motioned to everything. "But... you should have a chance at a life, and a purpose with it. Look at your children for example. They have their whole future ahead of them! They should be free. But you, sir. You are going to face your crimes justly! And your children will be put at the right hands of care." He picks up something. "I will call the police, and they will make sure you are dealt with fairly. I'm handling this... My way." He explained, pressing a button, and the television turns on. Angel looks surprised and glances behind him. "Oh, shit..."

Angel glances at the TV remote, the buttons looking like eyes and a face.

"Uh... Do you, uh... Do you have a phone to call 911?"

The man motions his thumb behind him. "Yeah, it's in the kitchen."

"Then... what is this for?" Angel asks, pointing to the remote with his free hands.

"It's a universal remote. Got it for the kids." Ralphie hugs them as Angel smiles, his eyes shining.

"Awwwww." Angel cooed. "That is so cute."

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Octavia was now looking exasperated with another of Adam's sexist rants of women and his masculinity.

"You know when you take her out for the fifth time and she still expects you to pay the check but you're like," He starts to speak in a high pitched-voice, 'Hey, I thought you wanted equality.'"

"NO! Our shared problem of overpopulation in Hell!" Octavia corrected him, annoyed a little now.

"Ohh." Adam pauses, then he laughs. "Well, that's not a problem! We got that covered!" He says, turning to Lute. "Lute, how many demons did you kill this year?"

"Got a good 275 this year, sir." Lute told him.

"275? Woah! Badass! Awesome job, danger tits! Pound it." Adam raises a fist for Lute to make a fist-bump, which she does.

"Uh no! That's bad! Terrible even!" Octavia corrected them again.

"Oh yeah. That must suck... For you!" Adam says, bursting into laughter.

"But these are souls... Human souls just the same as the ones you have up in heaven." Octavia said.

"They are not the same. They had their chance in their lives and they earned damnation." Lute corrected Octavia.

"You're wrong. Sinners made mistakes, sure, but everyone makes mistakes."

"Angels don't make mistakes." Lute told her.

"You really think that?" Octavia questioned the liutenant.

"I know that."

"Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life." Adam added.

As Lute comes around the table. "The only reason you're still here is because Lucifer gave your Hellborn kind a pardon from an exorcist blade." She told her. "How does that feel, to know how little you matter?" She asked.

"Oops, almost out of time. Guess we should get into it." Adam said.

"Oh, right!" Octavia rushes to present her plan as fast as she can, taking out a stack of papers to the table. "Okay, I've got a lot to get through and not a lot of time, and I feel like you weren't hearing me before as well."

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Angel arrived at the portal with Alastor and Husk at night.

"There he is!" Alastor said. "See you at the office!" He immediately went into the portal, not even caring about Angel for another second.

Husk places his hand on Angel's cheek. "You doing okay, sweetie?" He asks.

"Better now, honey. I think I just needed a minute to process." Angel explains.

"You have a good heart, honey." Husk said. And he playfully pinches Angel's nose. "Just a fuzzy head!" He kisses Angel. Husk walks through the portal after a few seconds.

Angel turns around and notices two police cars and a helicopter outside the house.

A loudpseaker voice was heard. "We got em', boys!"

A helicopter fires a missile through the roof and the house explodes in an massive inferno. Something hits Angel in the head. He looks down to see what is left of the teddy bear head. He looks stunned as Alastor grabs his neck and pulls him through the portal.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

Octavia sadly returns to the hotel. Loona runs up to her and hugs her.

"Via! Sooooo. How did it go, did they listen?" She asked her sister.

"Oh, they sure did... hear it. But, um-"

"Oh, come here! We have something exciting to show you." Loona began to leas Octavia to the couches, and to the group. "Blitz pulled some strings and it's about to air." She explained.

"Wait, the commercial? You all made a new one?.." Octavia asked the group.

"Yeah, one of my better performances if I do say so myself." Fizzarolli motioned to all of himself.

Octavia smiled at that, beaming with happiness, and she's even rearing up a little. "That's... that's amazing..."

"Sshh, it's starting." Fizz shushed Octavia.

'Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel-'

The TV cuts to a breaking news report.

Loona, Octavia and Fizzarolli get annoyed and angrily complain. While another member of the Hotel, Millie, just claps and giggles, and Moxxie just stares at them.

"Breaking news in Hell today! We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy that the next Extermination is happening sooner than ever before. Do you know what that means, Tom?" Katie Killjoy asked her colleague in the TV.

"No, Katie. What does that mean for us?" Tom asked back.

"It means we're all royally fucked!" Katie says, as her eye twitches.

Screaming can be heard from Sinners as the time on the Clock Tower reduces to 176 days until the next Extermination.

"Wait, what? Why?!" Fizzarolli asked, turning towards Octavia.

_________________________
Meanwhile.

The asassins and Mayberry are celebrating their victory. A white banner reads 'killed the bitch' in red letters. Vaggie and Mrs. Mayberry are each holding pieces of cake on their plates. 'We did it! :)', is written on the cake in light blue icing. Alastor has his arm in a sling. Everyone is wearing party hats. Everyone laughs and cheers except Angel, who sits with a distressed look on his face.

"Ahhh, did you see my little spider?!" Husk asked excitedly, hugging Angel. "We did it! I'm so happy!" He cheered.

"Well, here's to another mission accomplished! And Angel finally learned not to fuck up." Alastor said.

Husk rubs Angel's head affectionately. "And he learned that killin' people isn't that big of a deal if they try to kill you first or back!"

"That's messed up. But, I paid for it!" Mayberry said, laughing it all off.

Everyone except Angel laughs it all of. As if nothing has happened in the last few hours.

Chapter Text

"So. You ready to go, applepie?" Lucifer asked his daughter, who hated just being there.

"No." Charlie replied, tired, and annoyed.

"Oh come on. It's Lu Lu World! Aren't you excited?" Lucifer asked again, trying to cheer her up.

"I'm not five anymore, dad." Charlie responded.

"But it will be so much fun! And-" Lucifer began, but he got cut off by Lilith screaming in the background, smashing the houseplants.

Charlie grabbed a box of cereal on the table and she began shoving handfuls of it into her mouth. "Are you two done with the screaming for today?"

"Well..." Lucifer wanted to say something, but he shook his head. "You know what? I will call some security backup!" He explained.

"Security for a theme park?.." Charlie asked. "You're the King of Hell. You can protect us."

"Of course I can! But it's our special day together! I want to spend it with just you, without having to worry about all of that." Lucifer said. Charlie looked at him in slight shock, she looked away, and smiled a little, but she hid it.

"I'll be right back, sweetie!" Lucifer told his daughter, before rushing off to get the phone.

Charlie groaned and pulled her beanie down to cover her eyes. "I hate when he acts like that!"

Cut to the Assasins' Headquarters, where Alastor is busy doing things in his office, involving representations of Husk and Angel out of office supplies that he puppets around and speaks with. Between them is a framed photo of a deer, since Alastor still won't let anyone take a picture of him.

"'Oh, Alastor. You're such a good boss!'" He impersonated Husk. Then he did the same with Angel's voice. "'Yeah. The best boss ever!'"

"Why thank you, you two!" Alastor 'thanked' the two figurines, but, just as he laughed at it all, his office phone rang. "WHAT?!" He angrily asked.

"Why hello there, deer man." Lucifer said into the phone. "I have a special request for you~"

"Aw... Look, I don't feel like doing anything to you tonight. So. Not gonna happen."

"It's for my daughter. I'm taking my her to Lu Lu World, and I was hoping you brave little guys would accompany us!" Lucifer explained it.

"We're assassins, not bodyguards. Don't invite us to things unless someone is gonna die." Alastor also explained their careers and jobs.

"I'll pay you~" Lucifer said.

"Pay with what?" Alastor asked.

"Moneyyyy~"

"Done!" Alastor yelled happily, and he hung up the phone, and accidentally broke it. "Ffffuck." He cursed, but then shrugged and took out a megaphone. "HUSKERDUST, GET IN HERE! WE'RE GOING TO LU LU WORLD!"

Alastor's door opened and Husk looked inside the room. "Lu Lu World?.." He asked, very confused.

Angel excitedly smashes his head through the office door's glass. "Lu Lu World?!" He asked, more excited than Husk.

"THE LU LU WORLD!" Alastor also cheered excitedly.

"THE FUCK YOU SCREAMING FOR?!" Vaggie yelled.

"WE'RE GOING TO LU LU WORLD!" Angel cheered, excited to go.

"The fuck is Lu Lu world?" Vaggie asked. Which earned her a look from Angel and Alastor each. Husk just didn't care.

"You've never been there?!" Angel asked, grabbing Vaggie's shoulder and shook her.

"The people I was with were never into theme parks." Vaggie explained, trying to get out of Angel's grasp, which je did notice, and let go of Vaggie.

"Everyone. Let's get to the car!" Alastor ordered, standing up already.

"Do you even have a license?" Husk asked.

"Yesn't." Alastor replied with a smug smirk, and he walked out.

They got into their van, and drove over to the Morningstar's palace.

Angel and Husk got out to open the door for Lucifer and Charlie, the latter looking less excited than her father.
She took the window seat, just to get as far away from anyone else as possible. "Ugh..."

"Are you okay, your highness?" Vaggie asked, turning around from her seat to face Charlie.

"Yeah... Whatever..." Charlie waved her off.

"It won't be so bad. Maybe you'll enjoy it?.."

"I doubt it. I hate going to theme parks now..." Charlie explained.

"It will be okay, and if it won't, you can always tell your dad, right?"

"As if he'd listen. He desperatly wanted to go. And I didn't wanna dissapoint him with saying no." Charlie explained, groaning.

"Hey... Uh... If you want, I can tell Alastor, and he can convince your dad to not bring us there." Vaggie offered.

Charlie just shook his head. "He won't listen to anyone about this."

Once everyone was done getting into the van, and they drove for a little while, they all finally pulled into the rather empty parking lot. Angel exits the van first and opens the side door. Lucifer excitedly gets out of the Van. His daughter follows, albeit, far less excitedly. Lucifer puts on an apple-themed hat and gestures toward the park gate.

Charlie covers her head with her beanie so nobody would associate her with him, but she walked to the entrance.

"Now, remember: this is work and work only. Alright?" Alastor explained to Lucifer.

"Hey... Dad... Do we really have to-?" Charlie began to ask.

"Okay, yeah. Hold on right there." Alastor told her, before turning back to Lucifer. "If you try anything in this park. I swear to fuc-"

"You are so adorable when you are serious!" Lucifer cooed to him, booping him on the nose.

"I'm literally gonna be sick." Charlie said, disgusted at what the two infront of her were doing.

"Oh, shit! I knew today would be a lot! What do you need?" Husk asked, rummaging in a small bag he has, throwing out several pill bottles as he lists off his inventory. "Anti-acids? Ibuprofen?" He shows Charlie several hypodermic needles of a glowing, acid green substance. "Morphine?.."

"That was figurative." Charlie said, crossing her arms and walking away, annoyed. "What an old man." She muttered under her breath.

Husk chuckles sheepishly as he discards the needles. "She did say literally..."

"Wooooow! I haven't been to this place since I was a little kid!" Angel cheered, excited.

A large letter falls off the sign of a nearby ride, crushing the teenage imp underneath.

"It hasn't changed one tiny bit!" He said. Then he grabbed his partner, and shook him, pointing somewhere. "Ohhh! LOOK! It's Big Woobly!" Angel gestures toward a hideously malformed animatronic dinosaur, which opens its mouth and lets out a terrifying, demonic shriek.

"That is... unsettling..." Husk said.

"Oh, come on! It's fun! You've never been here?"

"No. Theme parks always disturbed me, especially the mascots."

Alastor suddenly appeared behind the two lovers. "Say. Why don't you two go and have your fun time? Vagatha and I will take care of everything else!" He offered them.

"Seriously?" Husk asked, looking at Alastor with suspicion.

"Yes. Go and have your fun."

"Oooh! We gotta do my favorite ride!" Angel exclaimed, picking Husk up and running off.

"If we are going to be out of their business. Why did we come along?!" Husk asked, to which he got no response to by anyone.

In another part of the park, Lucifer was walking along the path. Alastor was sneaking around with a rifle to protect them.

Meanwhile,Charlie was still tired of this all, walking with her father, slouched, and her posture is really bad.

"Princess?.." Vaggie asked Charlie, walking back towards her.

"I'm fine. I just hate it here..." Charlie said, looking at Vaggie.

"I get it. I don't like being here either." Vaggie told her. "Fuck them theme parks."

Charlie smiled at that a little. "Yeah. Fuck them theme parks." She agreed.

A gunshot disturbs the two's conversation.

The two girls look over to see a group of imps holding up Lucifer, while also holding up ropes, knives, and pitchforks at the ready. They quickly scatter when one of them got their head blasted clean off.

"You know, it's quite thrilling to see you on the job, deer man~" Lucifer patted Alastor's head.

"Save it, bitch. I'm working." Alastor replied, holding his gun close.

Charlie's mood instantly dropped. "You both need to get a room."

"Hey. I am offended. And I do not fick in the living room in the morning."

A woman walking nearby with her baby glares at Alastor before continuing on in a huff.

"What? I just said I'm not one!" Alastor yelled at the woman.

Lucifer suddenly gasped. "Oh! Look Charlie!" He points excitedly at the circus tent. "You used to cry such tears of happiness at this show!"

"Oh, no..." Charlie whispered and stared in shock.

"What's wrong?.." Vaggie whispered to Alastor.

"I have no idea." Alastor replied.

"I hate that clown." Charlie muttered.

"Hey... Your highness?.." Vaggie walked to Charlie.

"Just call me Charlie..."

"Okay... Charlie... Do you wanna go somewhere else?.. Maybe out of here?" Vaggie offered.

"That would feel like Heaven compared to being here."

Once ger father entered the tent alone with Alastor following after her. The two girls sneak out of the park.

After a while. The show was over. Abd Lucifer was clapping happily. "Ah hohohoho ho ho ho ho ho, how delightful! Did you like it, applepie?" He asks, turning towards the seat next to him. "Applepie?.. Charlie?.." He looks around, starting to panic. And he lets out a gasp. "MY DAUGHTER'S GONE!"

Alastor turns around to look at the panicking Lucifer. He rushes over to him to try and calm him down.

"Where the FUCK is my daughter?!" Lucifer grabbedAlastor by the collar of his suit. "TELL ME!"

"Okay, I have no fucking idea." Alastor replied, pushing Lucifer away.

Lucifer, who still hadn't calmed down, takes his phone out to text his daughter. "Sweetieeee. Where are you?.."

He waited, and waited, but he got no response back. He immediately grabbed Alastor by the back of his suit, and started to run off.

They went by Husk and Angel, who were playing a game.

"Hey. We'reofftofindhisdaughter, ifyouwannacomealongthendoit. Okay. Byeee!" Alastor explained while Lucifer kept running and dragging him.

"What?.." Angel asked. Husk just shrugged it off, and they went back to play.

As Lucifer sprinted across the cracked asphalt of the theme park, dragging Alastor like a manic kite, the deer demon managed to yell over the rushing wind, “You do realize this is entirely your fault, right?”

“My fault?!” Lucifer barked. “You’re the one who's the security!”

“I was shooting people! What else do you want me to do, sniff her out?!” Alastor shouted back.

Lucifer stopped suddenly, causing Alastor to slam into his back with a painful thud. Lucifer snapped his head back to look at him. “She’s my little girl, Alastor. If we don't find her," He began, turning around to face Alastor completely. "I will personally cremate you body!" He said angrily, as his horns popped out.

Alastor quickly nodded and looked kind of panicked. "Yeah... Totally. We'll find her. I'm sure. Yeah..."

Meanwhile, at some diner in the City. Charlie and Vaggie sat across from each other, sipping milkshakes in silence.

“So…” Vaggie started. “Think he’s noticed you’re gone?”

Charlie blinked once, sighed, then looked at the clock on the wall. “By now? He’s probably tearing the park apart.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right.”

“I didn’t mean to just ditch him,” Charlie admitted, leaning forward. “I just... I needed a break from him. Every time he tries to make me happy, it’s like he doesn’t actually see me anymore..." She explained.

Vaggie softened, placing her hand over Charlie’s. “He’s trying, even if he’s doing it in the dumbest way possible."

“I know,” Charlie said quietly. “But it’s exhausting pretending I’m still that little girl who loved clowns and those dumbass roller coasters.”

“Well... Atleast you don’t have to deal with that horrifying animatronic dinosaur anymore.”

Charlie laughed for the first time that day. “Big Woobly,” she groaned. “That thing still haunts my dreams.”

Back at the park, Lucifer was on his knees in the middle of the park. “I FAILED AS A FATHER!” He cried dramatically.

“For the love of Satan, would you get up?” Alastor hissed, yanking him by the arm. "You're making people stare."

“Oh, now you care about attention?” Lucifer snapped, standing up. “You literally announced yourself with a sniper rifle earlier!”

“I have a brand, dearie.” Alastor retorted back.

Before the argument could escalate further, Husk and Angel approached, both holding stuffed toys and cotton candy.

“Uh,” Angel said, “you two look like you just went through a breakup.”

“We might as well have,” Alastor muttered.

Lucifer whirled around, grabbing Angel by the shoulders. “HAVE YOU SEEN MY DAUGHTER?!”

Angel blinked. “Uh… Is she the blonde and depressed?.. Nope.”

“She ditched you,” Husk said flatly, taking a bite of his cotton candy.

Lucifer froze. “What?”

Husk shrugged. “Yeah, saw her sneak out with Vaggie. Didn’t stop ‘em though.”

“YOU WHAT?!” Lucifer screamed again.

“Hey, don't blame me. Alastor doesn't pay me enough to care,” Husk grumbled.

Lucifer growled and turned toward Alastor. “You. Find her.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re the best tracker I’ve got right now.” Lucifer explained.

“Oh, I am so flattered,” Alastor said, rolling his eyes. “Fine. But if I find her in a bar, I’m charging double.”

Lucifer nodded, wings flaring out behind him in frustration. “Deal.”

Charlie and Vaggie were now walking along the boardwalk just outside the park gates. The lights of the park flickered behind them.

"Do you think he’ll actually find us?” Vaggie asked.

"Yes, he will. He’s Lucifer. He’ll probably crash the park gates any minute now."

A blinding flash suddenly illuminated the street, and a second later Lucifer appeared.

“Applepie!” he shouted, his voice echoing. “WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?!”

Charlie groaned, dragging a hand down her face. "Because you think I'm still a little kid!"

Lucifer floated down, looking guilty. “I… I just wanted to relive when we were close, sweetheart."

Charlie softened, crossing her arms but smiling faintly. “You don’t have to force me to be happy, Dad. Just… be here. That’s enough.”

Lucifer paused. Then, gently, he smiled. “Alright. No more theme parks. I finally understand that you hate them so very much!"

Charlie laughed a little, and then she hugged her father. "Thanks dad... You're cool sometimes too..."

Chapter Text

At the Hazbin Hotel Octavia was pacing back and forth while panicking about everything that has happened since yesterday.

"Okay. So, the extermination is coming in six months instead of a year! No big deal, just a little setback. Nothing we can't handle. Just angels cutting our timetable in half, but who needs a whole year to save souls, am I right?!" Octavia says. And she starts to panic even more. "And next time when they cut the time in half again, and again, we'll just handle it, right?!"

Loona then stands up and she grabs Octavia, calming her down. "Yes. Yes we will."

Suddenly, the doors flung open. Fizzarolli burst into the room, holding up a flyer. "Guess what?!"

Loona threw Fizz a glare that said 'Not the time!'.

"Sorry..." Fizz begins to walk away. But Octavia looks up.

"No. Don't. What did you wanna say?.." She asked.

"Oh. It's a concert that THE Verosika Mayday. She's performing here. It says here that it's to, 'cheer up the crowd'." Fizzarolli explained.

Octavia and Loona looked at the flyer, then back at each other.

"Maybe it will ease your mind if we go to the concert?.." Loona asked.

Octavia looked a bit conflicted. But ultimately, she nodded. "Yeah. Let's go to see it!"

"Eugh. She's just a bitch who is a showoff." Blitz commented, taking a bottle of whiskey and drinking it.

"Blitz. Shut up." Loona ordered. "We are going."

"Yeah! And we will enjoy it!" Octavia added.

"Blitz doesn't like her because they're exes!" Millied yelled, Blitz quickly shoved a bottle into her mouth to shut her up.

"Wait what?" Octavia asked, tilting her head to the side a bit.

"Wow. Not even I knew about that." Fizzarolli commented.

"Because you just shoved up here! And-" Blitzo began, but he just ended up groaning. "Look. I am not going along."

"Oh yes. You will." Loona told him, growling at him again.

"For fucks sake- Fiiine!"

"Great. Then let's get ready for it!" Octavia cheered. "But one minor question, when is it?" She asked.

"It's gonna be at..." Fizzarolli quickly looked at the flyer. "Nine PM."

"Cool." Octavia nodded, and ran off to her room to get her jacket.

"I'll bring the drinks, sir." Moxxie said, pulling out an entire box of drinks with a britht smile.

"Moxxie, shut up." Blitzø said, scowling.

"Oookay..." Moxxie replies, then his smile returned once he spotted Millie looking at him.

"Great. I'mma go get my stuff." Loona said, before walking to her room.

Once the hound reached her room, she suddenly heard commotion outside of the hotel.

"The fuck?" She whispered, looking outside of her window. She saw an imp and a Hellhound carrying stuff, but their car was broken. "Hey. You two! Shut up, you're on private property-" She began to yell, the two figures staring up at her, she stopped once she spotted the hellhound, he was a dark grey hellhound.

Loona blushes and her eyes widen. "Nevermind! Sor-ry! Keep doing whatever the fuck you were doing!" She yelled out again, before shutting her windows.

Later that night. The all reach he concert arena, sporting cool, and dark outfits. Apparently, tonigth's concert wasn't a pop one. But rather, a rock concert. Which wasn't weird per-say, but it was a bit odd for a popstar. But, oh well. What could the group do againts it? Nothing much really.

"I do not want to be here..." Blitzø complained.

"Well. You have to be." Loona retorted, her arns crossed.

"Just so you know, I WILL hate all of it." Blitzo complained.

Behind the two, Octavia was talking to Millie. "I mean... I'm not a fan of pop music. But I love her as a person."

"Yeah. She's cool." Millie agreed, nodding her head.

The audience suddenly cheered once the lights turned off.

Spotlights cut through the darkness as the stage lit up in pink colors. The platform on the stage suddenly rises.

"Helloooooo, Pentagram City!"

The crowd erupted in cheers. Verosika appeared onto the stage, she had heart-shaped sunglasses on with.

Octavia's eyes widened, her earlier panic fading for the first time that day. "Wow... she's still amazing in person."

Loona smirked slightly. "Told you this might help you calm down."

"You said 'still amazing in person', by that you mean-?" Millie asked.

"I once met her person, my parents brought me a concert ticket a few years ago."

"Oho shiiit. Good for you." Loona nudged Octavia's shoulder, then they all looked back at the concert stage.

Fizzarolli was practically bursting with happiness next to them, bouncing on his heels, camera out to record everything. "Oh my Satan, I haven't seen her perform since... Ever!"

Blitzø groaned, crossing his arms tighter. "Yeah, yeah, she's great. Look at her, prancing around like she owns the place."

"Technically, she does own the stage," Moxxie said, trying to joke. Blitz gave him a death glare. "She most likely had her crew bringing it with her, since this place had no stages outside."

"Shut the fuck up, Mox."

Millie elbowed her husband. "Don't mind him, honey. He's just jealous."

"I am not jealous!" Blitz started, but froze mid-sentence when he felt Verosika's eyes flicked across the crowd and landed on him. A smile spread across her lips.

"Oh-ho... look who slithered into my show tonight," she purred into the mic. "Didn't expect to see you here, Blitzy."

The spotlight suddenly turned toward their group. The crowd whispered in excitement.

"Oh, for FUCKS sake..." Blitzo muttered under his breath.

Loona facepalmed. "You gotta be kidding me."

Fizzarolli bursted out laughing. "Oh, this is so worth coming for!"

Verosika giggled on stage, twirling her tail. "Don't worry, Blitz-o, you won't be the laughing stock tonight. You always are already, just by existing!"

The crowd laughed. The final nail in the coffin was Loona bursting out laughing for Blitz.

"Loona!" Blitz yelled at his daughter.

"Oh come on, live a little." Loona replied.

"This IS kind of a mean thing for her to do..." Octavia whispered.

"Ah- See?! She agrees!"

As the beat dropped and Verosika sang her first song, the lights danced across the arena.

Loona smirked. "I mean, kind of, logically speaking, Via's not wrong, but it IS kind of hilarious."

Verosika danced across the stage, microphone twirling in her hand. "But seriously, folks, I see some familiar faces tonight. Oh shit. Is that Fizzarolli?" She asked, squinting at the crowd on purpose, though, this time, it wasn't out of spite for said imp performer. "The Fizzarolli? Damn, Hell's gotten smaller to see him here."

Fizz blew a kiss dramatically. "Love you too, sugar lips!"

Blitz groaned. "I am never leaving the hotel again."

Loona rolled her eyes. "You say that every time you embarrass yourself in public."

Octavia giggled, her earlier anxiety melting away into genuine amusement. "You guys really do know everyone, huh?"

"Unfortunately," Blitz muttered, glaring up at the stage at Verosika.

Loona then looks around and spots the same hound from before. She then starts walking towards the hound. Blitzo notices, and his fatherly dread quickly turns to seething anger. She quickly checks her makeup before stepping nervously near the guy.

"Heyyyy… you…"

"Oh, hey. You're that hound that yelled at me and my coworker earlier."

"Yeah..." Loona chuckles. "Sorry if that was a weird thing..."

"It's cool." The hound replied. "We DID fall onto that hotel's property."

Loona smiled nervously. "Yeah! Totally cool. It was whatever. I was the one who overreacted. I'm Loona by the way!"

"Okay." The guy mimics her nervous tone and smile. "I'm Vortex!" He laughs, but not at her.

"That's hot... I mean, like, literally, y'know, 'cause vortexes... y'know, they give off heat. Probably. Right?" She tries to to be cool, but she comes off as even more nervous. And she bites lip nervously.

"Uh, yeah." Vortex chuckles. "I guess, but my friends call me Tex. You can call me that too if you want."

"Oh, yeah? I wish I had friends." Loona admitted out loud on accident, then she chuckled nervously. "Imean... No, I mean, I don't... I… I don't have friends... Really..."

Blitz snakes over to them and arrives and stands between the two hounds. "Am I... interrupting something?"

"Nah, man. Just having a conversation." Vortex replied nonchalantly.

Blitz then leans up and pokes Vortex's chest. "'Conversations' can lead to sex!"

Moxxie, Millie, Fizz, and Octavia meanwhile, just stare at the scene infront of them. Not even caring about the famous popstar infront of them.

"And... we've lost him." Moxxie sighs.

"Shouldn't we go over there and try to make Blitz stop?" Octavia asked the couple, pointing at the scene.

"I mean, if ya' want to. Ya' can." Millie replied, shrugging it off.

"Blitz, I was having a conversation! Get the fuck out of my business!" Loona growled at Blitzo.

"I just wanted to see what was so important that you'd leave your group alone." Blitzø replied.

"What, I can't have a moment of peace away from you?" Loona asked him angrily. "You don't even wanna be here! Why do you even care?"

"Because I don't want you hanging out with someone who works for Verosika!"

"Hey, dude. Why don't you chill out?" Vortex asked the imp, trying to calm him down.

"Why don't you stay out of it?! Okay? This is none of your business!" Blitzø replied.

Loona groans in frustration. "Fuck you, Blitz! Why can't you stay out of my face for, like, five minutes?!" She asked angrily.

"Because, I you're my daughter! And that should mean something!" Blitz angrily told Loona.

"Well, it doesn't! I didn't need you then, asshole!" Loona retorted back, crossing her arms (paws?) in anger. "I really don't." She added.

Blitzø looked a but shocked and sad, but before he could respond. Octavia got inbetween the two, and stopped them.

"Okay! Okay. Let's all calm down. Take deep breaths. Okay?.." She asked. Putting a hand onto both Blitzø's and Loona's shoulders. "Besides. We don't want people staring at us anyways. Soo." She began pulling the two towards a more secluded area.

Octavia led the two away from the crowd, bringing them to a much quieter corner, where the lights of the concert barely reached. The music was still audiable, but it was faint, and in the distance.

“Okay, there,” Octavia said, exhaling. “Let’s not make Miss Mayday's concert your next family drama episode, alright?"

Blitzø rubbed his temples. “Yeah, sure, great, except maybe I wouldn’t have to cause the damn drama if my daughter didn’t go flirting with strangers who work for my insufferable ex!”

Loona rolled her eyes. “You mean you wouldn’t notice if you weren’t so fucking controlling all the time!”

“I’m not controlling! I’m trying to be protective of you!” Blitz snapped nack at her, his tail flicking.

“Yeah, well, it’s the same thing when you don’t trust me to talk to anyone without losing my mind!”

Octavia sighed, glancing between the two like a mediator holding back a storm. “You both need to stop yelling!"

Loona turned away with a growl, muttering under her breath, “Maybe yelling infront of people would finally make him famous again.”

Blitz froze, the words hitting him harder than he wanted to admit. “You think I don’t know how much I screw things up, Loona? I’m trying, alright?! Maybe I just don’t want you making the same mistakes I did.”

Loona looked at him, her glare faltering for a moment. “…Yeah, well, maybe you should let me figure that out on my own.”

There was a brief silence, just the muffled sound of Verosika’s voice echoing through the walls, followed by another wave of cheering from the crowd.

Fizzarolli suddenly popped into the room. “Sooo… Are we done emotionally imploding yet, or should I give it another five minutes?"

Blitz and Loona both turned their glares on him. “Fizz, not the time,” Octavia said, a bit annoyed at him for interrupting.

“Alright, alright,” Fizz said, backing up with his hands raised. “Just checking! Oh, by the way, Verosika’s about to perform that new unreleased song, so, y’know, maybe stop screaming at each other and enjoy it before she decides to roast Blitz again on stage.”

Loona sighed and brushed past Blitz. “Fine. But this isn’t over.”

Blitz watched her go, the fight in him deflating. Octavia stayed a moment longer, giving him a small, knowing look.

“You care about her. That’s too obvious by now." Octavia said, looking down to Blitz. "But if you keep trying to protect her from everything, she’s just gonna keep running away from you.” She explained.

Blitz looked at her, a rare flicker of genuine guilt behind his eyes. “…Yeah. I know it.

Octavia smiled softly. “Then start showing her that you trust her, not that you’re afraid for her.”

After a long pause, Blitz sighed. “…You sound like my therapist.”

“Maybe you should listen to them,” Octavia replied dryly, before turning to follow Loona back toward the crowd. "Huh... Maybe therapist should be my job now."

Fizz then appeared and nudged Blitz. "So? You gonna do anything harsh again?"

Blitz just groaned. “Fizz, I swear to Satan-"

“Relax, Blitzy! You’re doing fine. Maybe next time you’ll let her finish a sentence for once."

Loona thrn walks back to Vortex, who places a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You okay? You were angry with him."

Loona just blushes. "Yeah, I'm fine. It's all fine." She said. "He'll get over it. He always does."

"I'm glad you could stick up for yourself, at least. That can take guts."

Loona nodded her head. "Thanks..."

Vortex sees her face, which showed little to no happiness on it. "Hey, if you're ever down to party, I'll give you a ring sometime." He offered.

Loona looked up at him, hope in her eyes. "Really? I mean, heh…yeah. Yeah."

"Yeah! My girlfriend throws a ton of crazy hound parties."

Once Vortex mentioned his girlfriend, Loona's expression shiftsx into dejection. "Nice. Can't wait for my first real one."

Vortex laughed a little. "Let's get you some friends, girl." He gives her a playful punch before walking away.

Loona looks down sadly, but once she looks up again, she walks back to her group. Octavia, upon seeing this, pulls her into a hug, trying to comfort her, to which Loona returns the hug. "Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Chapter Text

Up at Heaven's golden gates, they open and 'Cherub Towne' is shown. A Cherub, Cletus, flies in front of a camera.

"Well, howdy! I'm Cletus! Welcome to Heaven!" Cletus greeted. "Guess you did somethin' good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessin's!"

The Cherubs appear on a small, old-fashioned TV as they almost begin to sing, but Alastor blasts the TV with a shot gun, and it explodes before the cherubs could even start.

"Nice one!" Angel complimented.

"Gimme another TV, Husker." Alastor said.

Husk sweeps away the flaming debris of the previous TV, and he puts another old-fashioned TV onto the stand. He turns it on with a scared look on his face. The 666 News logo appears.

"Eh, nah. Not feelin' it." Alastor said, fixing up his gun.

Husk rolls his eyes and he switches the channel. A demonically dressed Betty Boop appears in black and white, dancing while holding a pitchfork. But botu Alastor and Angel look bored.

"Uh-huh. Keep going, keep going, keep going..." Alastor ordered.

Husk switches the channel again.

An ad for an episode of a tv series. "This week's episode of 'Yeah, I Fucked Your Sister, So What?', brought to you by VoxTek. Trust us with your entertainment!"

"Bingo!" Alastor yells, and shots the TV, even happier that it's his biggest rival's TV shows.

"You're on a roll today, Al." Angel said, putting his legs onto the table.

Suddenly, the ground starts rumbling which also knocks her cup over.

"Guys... Do you feel that?.." Vaggie asks, sitting up in her chair.

"Is that a hellshake?" Alastor looks up from his gun.

"That's a possible thing?.." Husk asks

"Alright! Don't panic!" Angel yells, grabbing Husk by the shoulder.

Husk stiffens from being startled by Angel's sudden outburst. "I'm not 'panicking,' because hellquakes don't even exist."

Vaggie grabs Husk roughly, and she shakes him. "STOP GETTING HYSTERICAL, PENDEJO!" She slaps Husk in the face, sending him flying against the wall and slightly dazing him.

Husk is then knocked down further by what appears to be a wrecking ball made of black tubes Part of the wall crumbles on top of Husk, crushing him. As the dust clears, the wrecking ball untangles into multiple robotic tentacles and a supervillain-esque demon uses two of them to hoist himself into the room through the hole, covering himself with his cape.

"Do not be afraid!" The man grins and extends his robotic tentacles.

"Please tell me you got that insurance thing." Alastor asks, his smile faltering.

Vaggie instinctively takes out her spear and points it at the man. "Who are you, and what do you want?!"

The man extends a tentacle into a loop-de-loop and slides along it to the other side of the room.

"I am Loopty Goopty!" The man introduces himself. Then speaks in a singsong voice. "Dastardly inventor of all things loopy and loopiiiiiish!"

"You could have just used the door, dude. Doesn't need to be this whole thing." Angel explained.

"I am eccentric and must therefore do eccentric SHIT!" Loopty Goopty does a wavy dance.

"Ugh! You reek of the living world. Did you just die?" Alastor covers his nose, extremely disgusted by the man's smell.

"YEEEEES! Moments ago, in fact! Which is what brought me HEEEERE!"

"Just sayin'... the front door would've gotten you here fine." Angel said.

Loopty holds up a finger to silence Angel, which is actually his middle one. "Shut up, spider boy." He then turns to Alastor. "This is the man I'm gonna need you to kiiiill!" He holds up an old photo of an old bald man in a bed. Alastor takes the photo from him.

"Not even a shit's length of time in Hell and already plotting revenge. I can respect a man with that sort of passion! Alastor, An overlord of Hell, pleasure to be meeting you." He shakes the man's hand. "Quite the pleasure."

"What's an Overlord?"

"Aww, you'll find out anyways." Alastor said, while he cleans his hands on his suit in disgust. "Now, what's the tea, my dear?" He asks.

"The TEAAAA?!"

Husk's arm appears as he struggles under the weight of the debris. "Guys, help!"

"Yeah, why are we killin' this guy?" Alastor elbows Loopty. "I mean, what did he do to you?"

Husk's arm inches back and he squeals in pain. "LOSING... OX-!"

"He was… my business partner! We Robotics, a technological empire! Earlier today, we were testing a new machine intended to stop, or reverse, the aging process! It could've saved all three trillionaires! But we neglected to test the machine on the poor, like we usually do. We were too sure of our own genius! But the machine was accidentally set FORWARD! By the time we managed to get out... it was too late! At least... for me! Now, that evil son of a bitch is going to take over the empire WE BUILT TOGETHER! Without me to share it with, he'll make all the goddamn money in the world and become the fourth trillionaire... and get ALL the credit!"

"Hm. I'm not sure that's really counted as evil." Alastor commented. "It was your fault anyways."

"It's evil towards meeee!"

Cuts to Husk, still stuck under the rubble. He weakly reaches his hand out for help. "Everything… is going… dark-"

"Oh shit!" Angel cursed and ran to Husk to pull him out.

"Now, get your asses up above and send that heartless, no-good son of a bitch to Hell, where he belongs!"

"Eh. You do know, Poopty-" Alastor began.

Loopty seethes at the name. "Looooptyyyy!"

Alastor waves his hand. "Yeah. Yeah. Whatever." He said. "If we do kill him, and when he ends up down here... y'know, you will be stuck with him. For all of eternity."

"Oh trust me..." Loopty summons an array of weapons from his back on a series of mechanical armatures: a pistol, a rifle, a missile launcher, and a circular saw blade. "I'm counting on it."

"That's kinda hot." Angel says, as he pulls Husk out of the rubble.

"Hey, is there a chance I could go with you guys this time?" Vaggie asks.

"Absolutely not, my dear." Alastor shook his head, and he walked to Vaggie. "Do you know how many freaks up there would try and 'change' a poor, little, helpless, and weak lesbian like you?" He coos and hugs Vaggie.

"I'm not any of those things!" Vaggie says and she tries to pull away. "Besides the lesbian part. But you know that I hate being down here alone. Or with a client. Especially one like this." She pointed her thumb at Loopty in disgust.

Alastor smiles wider, tightening his grip around Vaggie before finally releasing her. "Oh, I know, my dear, I know. But we can’t have your blood pressure shooting up," He pinches Vaggie's cheek a little, which annoys her. "Just because some mortal monkey annoys you too much. Leave this all to the professionals."

Vaggie glares at him, brushing herself off. "You’re a psychopath. You're not a 'professional'..."

Angel shrugs, dusting off his fur and checking his reflection in a broken shard of glass. "Takes one to know one, sweetheart. Now, let’s go kill a rich old geezer."

"If he does or touch anything, kill him." Alastor whispered to Vaggie, pointing a finger at Loopty, before quickly leaving the room.

The crew were now wearing wigs and disguises on a tour bus in the humans world.

Husk looks through binoculars at Lyle's mansion. "Gee! I wonder whose house this is..." He sarcastically said.

"And to your right is the home of famous inventor, Lyle Lipton!" The tour guide said.

The crowd "oohs" and takes pictures with their cell phones. Alastor removes his sunglasses, he put on a pair of heart shaped ones, he stole them from Angel, the latter can't have all the fun sunglasses all for himself.

"Let's do it, gang!"

All three of them pull out their weapons, and jump over a fence and land in poses.

"Let's kill this fuckin' rich guy!" Angel said, abd as soon as he did, the three race over toward the windows.

"And here you'll find three freakish attempting a murder! Things happen to famous people like this, all of the time!" The tour guide said again, with no concern in his tone whatsoever. And the people snap pictures.

The three dash over to the window, Angel peers through the window.

"Wow..."

Alastor and Husk join him in looking through the window.

Inside of the room. Lyle Lipton is lying on his bed, with an IV bag attached to him. A heart rate monitor sits on a shelf next to the IV bag. A TV screen and video player sit at the other side of his bed, connected to the bed itself. Lyle is holding a framed picture in his hands, looking at it sadly.

"That machine really did a number on him." Husk commented.

The three see Lyle putting a framed picture down and grabs the tube from his IV bag and begins tying it. "All the riches of the world can't fill the emptiness I'm feeling now that my shitty old body can't do anything of value."

"Oh, fantastic! He's gonna do the job for us for free!" Alastor said, genuinely happy.

Lyle finishes making a noose out of the tube, pulling the knot taught.

"Maybe we could help him?" Angel asked.

Lyle is about to put the makeshift noose over his head as the Imps watch with drinks and popcorn. The noose glows white and a concussive force knocks the Imps back. Lyle adjusts to the light and sees the three Cherubs floating down gracefully in three rays of light.

"Oh lord, ugly orphan children are in my house!"

Outside, the three recovered from the sudden blast of light.

"Who the fuck are they?!" Alastor asked angrily.

"Those are those cherubs we saw!" Angel said pointing to the inside of the house.

"We are Cherubs, Mr. Lyle!" Cletus introduced himself and his three buddies.

"I hate filthy orphan children!" Lyle commented.

"We're here to convince you not to kill yourself, sir." Collin bowed his head. "To grant you a blessing, on behalf of those in Heaven... Benefited by your amazing technological advances."

Alastor was now angry when hearing this. "Oh, HEEEELL no!" He rolls up his sleeve, pulling out a pistol. He then marches in through the window, smashing the glass instantly. "Don't let them-"

Not knowing where the floor is in relation to the window, Alastor face-plants onto the floor. Angel enters through a door, Husk peeking in.

"Lyle Lipton, it is our-" Angel began, then he glanced down at Alastor, before looking back at Lyle. "Very humble opinion that you should continue the process to commit dying."

"What do you expect to do with all this money now you're this old?" Husk asks in disgust.

"Is that a serious question?" Keenie asks back, adjusts Lyle's bedsheets, taking out his wallet that is full of dollar bills. "He can help spread his wealth around with the people of the world! And do so much good with it! And be so fulfilled!"

Keenie flies around, grabbing Lyle's wallet and happily throws the dollar bills in the air.

"Nnnno!" Lyle mumbled.

"He could pay for new hospitals and schools!" Collin said happily.

Lyle grips his blanket. "Why won't you let me die?.."

Alastor leans on the desk next to him, all smugly. "Oh, sounds like you need help with ending yourself there, huh? Angel, show the weapons he can use."

Angwl reaches into his coat and tosses a variety of weapons to the two. "I have some assault weapons, crossbow, a bow and an arrow. Some tommy guns, old-fashioned shotgun, knives, an AK47, a Korean Bayonet-"

"He's classier than that!" Collin cuts Angel off. But then he sees Lyle points the assault rifle into his mouth, before Collin takes it away from him. "There are still plenty of reasons to live, Mr. Lyle!"

"Yeah, right. Like debt and alcohol addiction." Husk comments.

"Life can be beautiful at any age!" Cletus cheered.

"And we'll show it to him!" Keenie added.

And the three Cherubs cheered.

"NO-"

The three cherubs roll Lyle in his bed outside to a hill overlooking a forest and a lake.

"Look around, Lyle." Cletus pointed at the forest. "God's gift of nature is a wonder to behold, regardless of age!" He winks. "Or wealth!"

"If you were to end your life, you'd be missing aaaaaall of this!" Collin added.

Alastor appears in a tiger costume. "Mm-hm. You're gonna buy all of that from a baby and the sheep it sleeps with?" He does a suggestive gesture with his fingers.

Keenie covers her mouth and gasps. Collin blankly stares in disbelief, and Cletus gives a disappointed look.

"That is so inappropriate!" Keenie yells.

"Oh, kiss our ass, prude!" Angel flips a double bird.

Alastor shoves Lyle aside in the face and sits next to him.

"Aaaanyway, take it from me, a fellow genius here. Nature is no picnic up close." Alastor says and he grabs a pair of binoculars from somewhere.

Lyle looks through the binoculars and sees an adorable group of bunnies and squirrels together. The critters are suddenly torn apart and eaten by a pack of hungry wolves.

Collin tries to tug his binoculars away. "S-Stop looking!"

Lyle holds onto the binoculars and not letting them go. "I CAN'T stop! I've never wanted to die more than I do now!"

A bear swipes a wolf to the ground. It raises a paw to attack but is then crushed by a falling tree, cut down by a beefy logger with a chainsaw. A beehive lands on the man's head and he screams, flailing his head to get the hive off while also throwing his chainsaw into the air. The chainsaw comes back down, cutting both of the man's arms off and causing him to scream harder, before his body is skewered from behind by the antlers of a charging stag as lighting flashes dramatically.

Everyone freezes in horror, Alastor fames it before grinning smugly.

"Uhhh, let's go check out someplace else!" Cletus said, his words shaking a little.

Husk and Angel fistbump smugly.

In a shopping mall. Lyle in his bed is pushed through the door hard enough to destroy both it and part of the wall surrounding it.

"Oh, Lord! Where are we now?! Just let me perish!"

"We're here to show you another thing life is worth living for: childhood wonderment!" Keenie said, motioning t9 a crowd of kids cheering by a sitting Santa Claus.

"Why... look at those sweet, disease-ridden vermin." Lyle said. "Th- Their joy comes from innocence, unspoiled by the burdens of adulthood... and their middle-class existence! Such simple joy they have. It is inspiring." He clutches his blanket, then looks at the Cherubs. "Thank you for showing me this."

"Hey, dipshit." Alastor yelled. Him and Angel dressed up as elves for a disguise, while, it's obvious why, Husk is dressed up a reindeer. They stand by Santa with a kid in his lap.

"Wanna see whose lap you're sittin' on?" Alastor grabbed Santa's beard and rips off the costume. "Santa" is revealed to be an ugly, sweaty gnome wearing a '#Cuties' shirt and underwear, making a gnome noise. The kids scream and run in terror. Lyle sobs like a baby as Collin and Keenie cover his eyes. A concerned Cletus pushes the bed away.

Later in the woods next to a wooden sign reading 'LOVERS' LOOKOUT'.

"Egh! This place reeks of TEENAGERS!" Lyle complained.

"Lovers' Lookout, sir!" Cletus cheered. "We're here to remind you about possibly life's greatest joy of all!"

Lyle makes, a kind of trembling, grabby hands. "Money!"

"No! Love." Collin corrected.

"I've never been in love before. I imagine it's quite nice!" Lyle dreamed about it.

Collin leaned closer to Lyle. "It's not too late, sir! You can still find-"

"HA! Nice try, ugly." Alastor laughed, he, Husk and Angel, the last one enjoying their outfits, were wearing dresses and wigs to look like women. Alastor then pulls out a megaphone. "Hey, horny lovers!" He yells. "Which one of you would FUCK with this old man?!"

All the cars speed away in an instant. Lyle deflates, dejected.

Collin gets into Alastor's face. "You know, you three are so utterly c-c-cruel! We're just trying to give hope to someone in need!"

"Oh... And you three are so superior to us just because WE want some selfish, greedy capitalist DEAD!" Husk throws his hands out for emphasis.

Alastor walks up to Husk witha spray bottle. "You're makin' things too real now, Husker." He sprays it into Husk's face.

Later, inside of an auditorium. A woman dressed as a Viking is singing opera on stage while wearing a fake unicorn on her lower torso. A well-dressed man plays a grand piano behind her. The cherubs and the audience are also well-dressed, though Lyle only wears a bowtie over his simple hospital gown.

"Behold! The wonder of art and music!" Cletus pointed at the stage. "Somethin' always there to comfort, entertain, and live for!"

Up above the stage, the three sinners look down from a catwalk near the ceiling.

"So… how do we make this be bad?" Angel asks.

"We can't." Husk replied.

"Unless we ruin opera somehow!" Alastor commented, and he grabbed the spotlight and moved it away from the singer. The singer pauses and follows the light, resuming her song. Alastor moves the spotlight again, and the singer pauses to follow it again.

Alastor chuckles evily, and moves the light faster and faster around the stage as Lyle and the cherubs narrow their eyes in suspicion. Alastor wiggles the spotlight around aggressively, then he looks shocked all of the sudden, because he realized he accidentally broke it off entirely.

The woman sings a final high note before the light crushes her on stage, smashing her to pieces and splattering blood all over the stage. The audience, Lyle, and the cherubs scream, while the pianist nervously tries to keep playing, his face drenched in sweat.

"Well, at least we made it bad." Alastor shrugged it off, unbothered by the fact he killed someone.

The three cherubs fly angrily up toward the sinners.

"THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD IT!" Cletus yells. "You three monsters have messed with us enough!"

"We're just trying to do our j-j-job!" Collin stammered.

"Well, so are we!" Angel yelled.

"EEENNNOOOUGH!" Cletus yelled, and him and the two other Cherubs summon golden crossbows and aim them at the sinners. "We are saving that old man's life, whether he wants it or not!"

"Well, someone wants that fucker dead, okay?" Alastor yelled back at the Cherub. "And he paid in advance, so I spent it all on this for my favorite worker at my company," He explained, pulling out a little exorcist keychain that has a target point on it's stomach and head. "so he's gotta go!"

Keenie flies into Alastor's face. "You all are such disgusting, loathsome beasts!" She insults Alastor. "Sinners are nothing but dirt, that commited terrible crimes when they were alive! Shitty dead people tread you! And now, you're meddling with the lives of HUMANS! Who could do so much good in life!"

Husk grabs Alastor and pushes him aside to face Keenie. "So are you! So why don't you shut your mouth. Because you are judgmental," He pulls Keenie by her necklace and snaps it back. "cotton candy haired, classist, SLUT!" He snapped.

"FILTHY DEMON!" Keenie yells and tackles Husk.

And so, they all begin to fight, Keenie and Husk roll over in a 'cat' fight (haha. Get it?). Cletus and Collin shoot golden arrows at Alastor and Angel, who run away, taking out their guns in the process. Angel jumps off of the catwalk, grabbing and swinging on a rope. He aims his pistol at Keenie, who is still fighting with Husk as they fall. Angel aims up and fires at a rope which releases a sandbag that slams into Keenie, separating her and Husk. Angel swings over and catches Husk as Cletus and Collin chase them down while firing their crossbows at them.

"Thanks, hon." Husk looks at Angel and they stare into each other's eyes.

"Don't even mention it." Angel said, and they started to make out while swinging above the stage.

Husk pulled two machine guns out, and firing them as the the two sinners spin rapidly. Alastor climbs onto a catwalk while the bullets hit and kill various audience members in the first two rows, but they all miss Lyle.

"It's all starting to make sense now! Life is worth living because we only get one! We must cherish it!" Lyle said. "If these creatures from bith Heaven and Hell are going through these lengths over my life, then certainly it's worth living! Killing myself is not the answer! Plus… I'm still rich! I can just buy all the things!" He pulls out two wads of cash in triumph. "I NO LONGER CRAVE DEATH!"

The audience claps happily for Lyle. Husk and Angwl, while spinning and firing their guns and being chased by Collin and Keenie, accidentally shoot a woman in the audience in the eye, killing her instantly.

Alastor runs along the metal scaffolding with his pistol. He jumps onto a bit of scaffolding holding some spotlights attached to the ceiling with a rope. He and Cletus point their weapons at each other. Alastor attempts to fire but finds his gun empty, looking at it in shock, his smile dropping a little. With a wide-eyed glance at Cletus, the deer demon throws the pistol into Cletus' face.

"Oof! You fucker!" Cletus yells, while momentarily blinded, he recklessly fires an arrow, severing the rope holding up the scaffolding Alastor is standing on and the one which Husk and Angel are swinging from. The three sinners all fall with the metal scaffolding as is smashes onto the floor of the stage, narrowly missing the pianist.

That same pianist is startled and stops playing, then straightens his bow tie, drops his stool down onto the stage, and uses it to drop down from the bent floorboard. The board then sends the piano flying through the air, breaking in the process. The Sinners and the Cherubs follow the piano with their eyes as it falls. Lyle turns to see the piano flying straight towards him, screaming like a girl and scrambling out of his bed into a seat. Unfortunately for him, the piano shifts to his new location and crushes both him and a few corpses that were there.

Husk grins as he sits tied up to Angel. The couple and their boss grin smugly. "Well, well. Would'ya looook at that?" Husk commented smugly. "You did our job for us!"

Angel smirks and gives the cherubs two middle fingers.

The Cherubs are staring at Lyle's unfortunate death in utter shock. Collin gasps in horror.

"Ohhhh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my Gooood!" Collin rambles, while panicking.

Keenie grabs Collin by the shirt and slaps him across the face a few times. "Get a hold of yourself, Collin! And do NOT use the Lord's name in VAIN!" Keenie yells at him.

Cletus angrily points at the sinners. "THIS ISN'T OVER!"

Keenie creates a portal to Heaven and the cherubs fly through, only to be pushed back.

"WHAT THE?!"

A group of cherubs descends, with two bees, two sheep and Deerie, the leader. The deer conjures up reading glasses and a clipboard. "Mmm, yeah, no, sorry, Cletus, but I'm afraid your actions resulted in the death of a human." Deerie explained. "I'm afraid you can't re-enter Heaven. Yeaaaah, noooo..." She shook her her head.

Cletus, Collin, and Keenie stared at them in shock. "WHAT?!"

Deerie smiled condescendingly. "Yeaaaah, mmmmm, sorry! Yeaaaah, no…"

"Is there… anything we can do?.." Collin asked.

Deerie files her hoof. "Yeaaaah, nooo!" She chuckles. "Noooo, no, no." She points her hooves at Collin, Cletus and Keenie.

"Bu- But, we didn't mean to!" Keenie stammered while trying to explain stuff. "We'd never! It was them-" She points to the spot where the sinners were, only to find them gone. All three cherubs stare wide-eyed, Keenie's pointing hand trembling.

"Anyway, sorry, guys. But those are the rules! Yeaaaaah. Byyyye!" Deerie does a happy wave before she and the group vanish through the portal.

"Wait! But-" Cletus flies toward the portal but it closes. Cletus breaks down into tears and cries.

Back down in Hell in their office, Alastor claps his hands together. "Welp, the old man wanted to live again and we didn't kill him, so we failed. Thanks to those fuckin' cherubs, he's probably up in Heaven now, so... It's a shame." He shrugged a little. "All our client wanted was eternal revenge on his business partner. And now the two are forever separated, and now we gotta face the fire of fuckin' up."

Vaggie was looking at the keychain she got, while stabbing it's head with a little needle. "When are you going to tell the client?" She asked, not looking up.

"Oh, I already had Angel send a text, and... we're in good hands, 'cause texts don't make people angry." Alastor explained, holding up Angel's phone.

Vaggie instantly looks up to Alastor. "You what?!"

The wall suddenly explodes. Loopty is slowly descending from an escalator. "Alastaiiiir!"

"We can explain everything. I was-…" Alastor began, but he got cut off by another metal escalator crashes through the wall and Lyle, now a mechanical demon with piano keys for teeth and a rolling ball in place of legs, arrives with a grin.

"Lyle Lipton?!" Angel and Husk ask, shocked and confused.

"I don't understand. We thought you went up to Heaven." Angel said, scratching his head.

"Heaven?! You don't make millions in technological advances in robotics by NOT experimenting on the poor!" Lyle said and laughed.

"Oh, you no-good, HEARTLESS son of a BITCH!" Loopty also laughed, then he turned to Alastor. "Thank you for reuniting me with my best friend!"

"The only question now is what do two old genius robotic inventors do now that we're in Hell?" Lyle asked.

"Everyone, STOP FUCKING UP MY WALLS!" Alastor yelled. "Husker is gonna have to fix it at the end of the day!"

"Excuse me?.." Husk asked, tilting his head a little in confusion.

"Oh, chill out, Husker." Alastor waved his hand at Husk, and rolled his eyes. "Now, everyone that doesn't work for me. Get out of the building."

"I'm not fixing up your walls." Husk said, taking out his drink. "So go and fuck yourself, bitch."

Chapter Text

At the hotel, Octavia and Loona were getting ready to go out to invite more guests.

"Okay, so we are so ready for this!" Octavia exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips haplily.

"Oh, please, you had less then half a chance when you started all this bullshit." Fizzarolli commented, plopping down onto the couch. "All you have here are a bunch of hellborns. No sinners whatsoever. There's no silver lining this time, toots."

"Sure there is! We just...have to look a little harder for it!" Octavia responded.

"Well, while you're lookin', the rest of this ring's going nuts." Fizzarolli waves his phone in their faces. "People are already freaking out about the news. Look at what's happenin' in the Doomsday District." He scrolls down an article with the bottom showing a demon screaming in front of a fire. His phone suddenly gets a notification, and Octavia accidentally reads it.

"What does 'Come now or I'll-'" She begins to read it, obviously correcting the misspellings in the text.

"Aah, heh, nothin'. Mammon just says he is freaked out about the news too. Since I am in this ring and all of that." Fizzarolli explained, fumbling it all a little. "And like I said, everyone's losin' their shit over all of this." He added.

"Yeah, that's true..." Loona nodded her head. "Sinners are desperate right now..." She suddenly looks hopeful. "Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the exterminations?.."

Octavia gasps, realizing what her sister in arms said. "This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!"

"Cute idea and all, but you really gonna go out in all of this?" Fizzarolli asked again.

"Well, it's not like people are just gonna show up on our doorstep." Octavia said, before going to her room to get ready.

About an hour went by, Octavia and Loona were getting ready to go out.

"Alright. I got the flyers, my coolest jacket," Octavia listen off the things. "And of course, you, to back me up." She pointed happily at Loona.

And so, they went out to find guests.

Out on the streets, Octavia waved at a demon who was holding a newspaper before she catches his attention, she holds up a flyer.

"Hi, mister!" She greeted, and so, she began. "Are you interested in redemption? We do trust exercises, and-"

"Go fuck yourself!" The demon yelled at her, which earned him a big kick from Loona.

"YOU fuck yourself!" Loona yelled at the sinner.

"That's okay! It's just one sinner. There's millions of more down here. Maybe some of them will try." Octavia said hopefully.

But as they kept going on, they were either ignored, rejected, or insulted, that last one always caused Loona to be really mad, and attack the ones who did that.

Hours later, the two have just returned, Octavia threw herself onto a couch, she was exhausted.

"Soooo? How'd it go?" Fizzarolli asked.

"Not. A. Word, clown." Loona replied, sitting down and sighing.

"Yeah well, who wouldn't wanna use their last days fucking and fighting?" Fizzarolli asked, a smug look on his face.

As Fizz checks his phone, they hear a knock on the front door. Octavia groans, bt gets up from the couch and she walks over to it and opens the door, only to find Sir Pentious behind it, holding his hat.

"Why, hello my dear."

"Oh! Hello!" Octavia greeted.

"I heard that you're helping people. People who want to be better?.." Pentious explained.

Octavia lets out a gasp and runs over to grab his hand and lead him to the door of the hotel.

"Then you heard it right! Welcome to our home of healing, our resort of restoration, our-"

"Via, who is this?" Loona asks.

"This is a slithery... Uhm... Slimy... Special little man!" Octavia said. "You didn't tell me your name..." She looked up at the snake.

"Sir Pentious," He bowed his head. "Your majesty."

"Aww. No need for formalities," Octavia waved her hand. "Just call me Octacia. Via for friends."

"I came here after seeing your flyers iut on the street." Pentious explained.

"How do we even know that we can trust him?" Loona asked, crossing her arms.

"I... Uhm... Don't actually know?.. But he doesn't have any weapons, or a war machine with him. And he came alone." Octavia explained.

Loona sighs. "Fine. But if he does anything, I will beat him."

Octavia runs up and hugs Loona. "Oh! Thank you thank you thank you thank you!" She let's go of her. Then looks at Sir Pentious. "Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!"

Octavia starts to lead Sir Pentious to the inside of the hotel.

"Oh no darling! Thank you! You won't regret this." Pentious nodded his head, and followed Octavia, not that he had a choice to do anything else, she was holding his hand.

"Atleast no wall exploded this time." Moxxie whispered.

"Can you believe it? I'm so proud of her for finally getting a real sinner guest here!" Millie cheered, clapping her hands happily.

"And he's actually someone who's interested in redemption!" Octavia cheered too.

Sir Pentious nodded his head. "Of course I am."

"I bet he is as harmless as a little small puppy." Millie commented.

"'Harmless?'" Loona raised an eyebrow. "This guy once tried to level an entire block with an army of steampunk airships."

Sir Pentious huffed, puffing out his chest. "Ah, well, bygones, bygones! Every great mind has its... explosive tendencies!"

Octavia giggled awkwardly. "Right! But we’re all about new beginnings here! No explosions, no death rays, no doing... Evil science things."

Fizzarolli peeked from behind the couch, smirking. "Oh, this is so gonna end with fire."

"Fizz!" Octavia snapped, but Fizz just shrugged.

"Hey, I’m just sayin’, snake boy’s got that 'mad inventor about to relapse' look."

Sir Pentious fixed his tie nervously. "I assure you, my inventing days are temporarily suspended, because of... Reasons... I will only start again when my genius is needed in a moment."

Loona groaned. "Yeah, well, it better not 'require' anything that explodes."

Octavia smiled brightly, stepping between them. "You’ll see! This is a big step forward. If he can change, anyone can!"

Pentious blinked at her optimism, his tail curling nervously behind him. "Indeed… I shall go on a path to prove myself worthy of your sparkly-eyed faith."

Octavia clapped her hands. "Great! I’ll show you to your room!"

As they disappeared down the hallway, Fizzarolli leaned toward Loona, voice low. "You think she realizes she just invited a Victorian supervillain into this place?.."

Loona sighed. "Nope. But honestly? After today, I’ll take any sinner who doesn’t tell her to screw off."

Fizz chuckled. "Fair point. Still, I give it two days before his room turns into a science lab."

"Two?.." Loona smirked. "You’re being real generous here..."

Meanwhile, in the hallway, Octavia led Sir Pentious past the crimson walls and ornate lights of the Hazbin Hotel.

"This place... Has quite the aesthetic." Pentious murmured, his eyes darting over some portraits.

"It’s meant to feel welcoming," Octavia said. "Even if you’ve done bad things, it’s never too late to make something good out of it."

Pentious hesitated, his hand resting on his hat. "No one’s ever told me that before..."

Octavia smiled softly. "Then I’ll be the first to do it!"

A flicker of warmth crossed Pentious’s face, strange and foreign. "Perhaps… redemption isn’t as ridiculous as I once believed."

"See?" Octavia said, beaming. "That’s the spirit! You’ll fit right in here."

A beat later, a loud crash echoed from downstairs, followed by Loona's voice yelling, "I just said don’t throw the chair at Moxxie, Blitz!"

Octavia sighed. "...Mostly right in..."

Sir Pentious blinked. "I see this establishment has character..."

"Yeah," Octavia said, grinning. "And now, so do you."

Sir Pentious gave a theatrical bow, his hat sweeping low. "Then I shall go on to be a distinguished addition to your little sanctuary."

Octavia laughed softly. "Good attitude! Oh, and your room’s just through here." She pushed open a door to a cozy bedroom, with gold-framed lamps and a bed that looked like it belonged in an over-decorated mansion. "We tried to make it feel a little like home."

Pentious looked around, blinking. "It’s... quaint," he said, as though unused to the word. His tail curled around a bedpost. "No brass, no gears, no pressure gauges..."

"Yeah, no experiments, remember?..." Octavia said. "You’re here to rest that brain of yours now."

He gave a nervous chuckle. "Ah, yes, of course. Rest. That thing that happens when one isn’t crafting anything."

"You’ll get used to it." Octavia laughed a little. Then she began to leave the room.

Downstairs, Loona was cleaning up Blitz’s mess, Fizzarolli lounged nearby, tossing a stress ball back and forth.

"So, how long do you think it will take before snake boy starts building death traps again?" Fizz asked.

"As soon as Octavia turns her back." Loona grumbled, throwing a broken lamp piece into the trash.

Millie popped in from the kitchen, beaming. "Aww, give him a chance! Everyone’s gotta start somewhere!"

Fizzarolli snorted. "Yeah, like prison."

"Fizz!" Millie scolded, hands on hips.

Octavia came down the stairs just then, clasping her hands together. "Okay! Sir Pentious is all settled in. He’s actually being really sweet!"

"Sweet?" Fizzarolli raised an eyebrow. "Did he hypnotize you?.."

Octavia ignored the jab, grinning proudly. "We did it, guys. We actually got a sinner who wants to try redemption!"

Fizzarolli chuckled at what she just said. "Yeah, one down, infinity to go."

Loona leaned back in her chair, arms crossed. "Still more than we had this morning."

"I'm just glad that us trying to help is working." Octavia said quietly.

The next morning, Octavia started putting up a banner that reads 'Happy first day here, Sir Pentious!'

"That looks perfect!" Octavia said, while squeling in joy. "I am so excited that Sir Pentious is staying at the hotel! And he hasn't tried to pull any overtaking at night either!"

Just as soon as she said it, Sir Pentious comes in, rolling in a new machine that his Egg Boiz are sitting on.

"What the hell is that?!" Loona asks, pointing at the machine.

"Oh, hello, hound girl. It's my new invention, the Skin Flayer 11,000! I'm really looking forward to shooting the other residents!" Pentious explained.

"What? Why?" Octavia asked, Loona crossing her hands again.

"Everyone is being too nice for hellborns!" Sir Pentious said, while looking around in suspicon. "Obviously it must be a lie. I can sense that they are planning to kill me. But when? How? I must be prepared!" He explained. "Ooh, the new parts of my machine are here."

Two sinners come in, wheeling in boxes of weapons. Pentious slithers over to them.

One of them holds out clipboard. "Sign, please."

Pentious signs the clipboard while the other sinner wheels in the boxes.

"Thank you for your business. Enjoy your Carmine purchase."

The two sinners walk out of the lobby as Pentious takes the crate full of parts and weapons for his machine.

"Carmine? As in, Carmilla Carmine?" Loona asks. "You are buying parts from an overlord?"

Sir Pentious nods his head rapidly. "Uh, of course. She's the top weapons dealer in all of Hell."

"Okay, well that stops right now." Loona takes Sir Pentious's boxes away.

"Hey! It hasn't even started yet!" Sir Pentious complained.

"You absolutely cannot build weapons in this place." Loona said, glaring at the snake.

"Pentious, noone is trying to kill you." Octavia put a hand on the snake's shoulder. "People are being nice because they want you to feel welcome."

Sir Pentious peeks over his machine to scowl at the other residents and workers.

"Hmm, I have my doubts." He says.

"Well, it's true. You have to trust us." Loona explained, putting her hands on her hips.

"But I don't." Pentious complained.

"Well, why don't we focus on that for today's activities?" Octavia suggested.

"Not before we lay some ground rules." Loona said. "No more building weapons, and no more plotting against other guests."

Octavia nodded enthusiastically. "Exactly! Today, we’re going to do some trust exercises and team activities. It'll be fun, I promise!"

Sir Pentious folded his arms, looking unconvinced. "Trust exercises, you say... Involving what, exactly? Are these exercises... A safe thing?.."

"Safe-ish," Loona muttered, muttering the -ish part under her breath. "Mostly safe though."

Octavia clapped her hands together. "Great! Let’s start with something simple. A game of 'Two Truths and a Lie.' It's a great way to get to know everyone's personalities!"

Sir Pentious raised an eyebrow. "A game? In my experience, games lead to betrayal."

Fizzarolli snickered from the couch. "Welcome here then, buddy. Betrayal is kind of our... thing."

Loona rolled her eyes. "It never was, Fizz. Stop it already."

"Exactly!" Octavia said, spinning toward Sir Pentious. "You don’t have to trust everyone at once. Just start small. And hey, I’ll go first!"

She clapped her hands again, excitement radiating. "Okay! Two truths and a lie about me: I can play the cello, I once fought a demon over a parking spot, and I’m secretly a champion in competitive knitting!"

Sir Pentious squinted at her, his tail flicking. "Hmph… Competitive knitting sounds far-fetched. That must be the lie."

Octavia gasped dramatically. "No! That’s true!" She laughed. "I actually fought over a parking spot with a demon. The lie is the cello, I can barely play ‘Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star' on that thing."

Pentious tilted his head, looking both impressed and skeptical. "Intriguing... Perhaps these exercises aren’t entirely useless..."

Loona crossed her arms. "Don’t get too comfortable. You break the rules again, and I won't hesitate to put a stop to it."

Pentious nodded, trying to hide a grin. "Understood Miss Loona. I shall comply."

Octavia clapped her hands again. "Perfect! Now, let's bring in some of the other residents. Time for everyone to introduce themselves and try the game!"

Pentious swallowed nervously. "Very well... I shall participate!"

Octavia beamed. "Yes! Welcome to your first day of redemption, Sir Pentious. And you're already doing so good at this stuff! Let's see just how far you can go!"

Loona sighed. "This is gonna be an extremely long day... But seriously, no. More. Weapons."

"You got it, Ma'am!" Pentious quickly stood put his hand to his head as a way to salute to Loona a little, and then he sat back down.

"Hmm... Let's see... Millie! It's your time!" Octavia said.

"Okay." Millie said. And sat down next to them. "Hmm... I love my husband, I used to be a wanted criminal, and I hate Loo Loo Land!"

"I think it's that she was a Wanted Criminal." Pentious said.

"Nope! It's that I hate Loo Loo Land! I love that place!" Millie corrected him, smiling sweetly.

"We're about 90% sure she's harmless." Octavia said, laughing nervously. "Totally harmless."

"Oh come on! Millie would never hurt anyone on purpose or for fun!" Moxxie said, shaking his head at the thought that anyone would belive his wife can hurt anyone.

Chapter Text

Octavia in the hotel lobby, panicking and planning out everything with lots of paper with strings attached with everyone else watching her, disturbed by her behavior.

"I'm just not quite understanding why it's not working. Okay, okay, think Via. Think, think, think, think, think, think, think, think. Okay if I do this, it's going to be-" She gasp. "I have trust falls every single morning. We can do-" She gasps again.

"Yikes..." Fizzarolli grimaced at the sight.

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, Octavia! Think!" Octavia yells at herself, grabbing her feathers in a panicked state.

"You, uh, you good there, Via?.." Loona asks. Octaica looks back with a sleep-deprived, insane look in her eyes that red veins are in her sclera.

"Nope, no! Not really!" Octavia responds, bursting out in a maniac like laughter for a second. "I've been up all night trying to figure out why the hotel isn't working." She explains, crushing the paper that was in her shaking hands. "We've done trust falls. We've tried sharing our feelings. We only have a couple months left before the angels come-" She turns into demonic form and laughs maniacally again before turning back to normal. "And at this rate, we will not be able to do anything!"

"Maybe we could call-" Blitzo began, walking to the couch.

Octavia gets up close to his face, holding his face desperately. "DON'T SAY IT!"

"-your parents." Blitz finished anyways, as Octavia groaned and let go of his face. "Look. I know you don't want to. But Stolas asked us, especially me, to watch over you, and to make sure you're well. And right now, you aren't well."

"Pluus. Maybe he could get you a meeting with Heaven!" Moxxie added, trying to lighten the mood too. But this caused Octavia to gasp in shock.

"Good job, asshole." Loona glared at Moxxie.

"Didn't she already try that?" Fizz asked.

"It was a happy gasp! And the first meeting was with Adam, he was a huge asshole. But he isn't in charge of Heaven itself!" Octavia explained, throwing her hands up in happiness. "We could go to the top! There's sure to be some angels who will listen to me." She takes out her phone and scrolls through her contacts. "I'm sure my parents would love to help me!"

Octavia's feathers ruffled as she scrolled rapidly through her contacts, muttering numbers and names under her breath. "Yes! Yes! If I call them, we can bypass all the nonsense! They'll understand!"

"Via," Loona began cautiously, "maybe you could slow down a bit? You're kind of... Vibrating."

"Vibrating?!" Octavia screeched, throwing her hande in the air. "I need to move faster! The hotel's collapsing in inefficiency right now! If I don't act, if we don't act-" She paused, her eyes wide, darting around the lobby as if the walls themselves were scheming against her. "Everything will crumble!"

"Your highness?.. If I can say... I'm sure nothing bad will happen." Sir Pentious said.

"Yeah... Maybe you're all right..." Octavia mumbled, scratching the back of her neck. "I'll just call my dad and mum... And they can try something..."

Elsewhere, at the Goetia's palace. Octavia's parents, Stella and Stolas were sitting at their dinner table, talking to each other.

"Andrealphus got so much in trouble for what he did." Stella laughed at the memory.

"How fun it must have been." Stolas replied, reading his book and eating the food that was infront of him.

"Yes. It was funny." Stella said.

Suddenly Stolas' ringtone plays. he picks up his phone, and was shocked who was calling him.

"What? Who is it?" Stella asked, leaning closer to see who was calling Stolas.

"Daughter? Daughter calling us!" Stolas yelled, as if it was an emergency.

"Uhm-uh... Try to be nonchalant!" Stella replied, also panicking. "Like... Hello, Via! H-Hey, heyyy, hey~ Or something!"

"Oh, this is the first time she's called us this year! This has to go perfectly!" Stolas shouted out, and he took a deep breath before he picked up phone. "Hey, sunshine!"

Stella and Stolas both immediately facepalmed at what he just said.

"Satan why?!" Stella groaned.

"Hey, dad... Mom..." Octavia said into the phone.

"Hey! How are you?!" Stolas asked nervously.

"You know exaxtly how I am, Dad. Running my hotel and all of that..." Octavia said.

"Right! Yeah! You told us before!" Stolas replied.

"Listen, Dad, I've got... kind of a big ask from you and mum..."

Stolas coughs and sets down his tea. "Yeah, of course." Stolas replied, nodding his head despite knowing Octavia can't actually see him do it. "Anything in my power is yours for the asking."

"I need to speak to Heaven. Well, whoever's in charge up there, above Adam, above anybody. I need to go to the top." Octavia explained.

"Oh, no. No~" Stella suddenly took the phone from Stolas' hands. "No, no, no, no, Via, no, no, no. That's, uh hah, no. Sorry sweetie... But that's... Not really possible for us to do... Sooo..."

"Look, Mum... I don't ask you for much, I never have, but this is really important to me. It's the most important thing I've ever done. And I... need you two. I need your help..."

"I don't know, Via... It's not in our control to do anything like that..." Stella replied sadly.

"Please, just come see what I'm trying to do here... You'll see why it's a really good idea. And Heaven is bound to agree if I get the chance to talk to them. Please..." Octavia pleaded.

"Wait. You're... inviting us over?!" Stolas asked, his mood turning happy now. "Absolutely! Hoh! We'll be there in like... An hour or two!" He then hangs up the phone. "Our daughter wants to see us!" He yelled excitedly.

"Fuck yes!" Stella cheered as well, then rushed off into the bedroom to get ready.

Back at the hotel. Everyone was looking at the phone in Octavia's hands.

"Welp, we have an hour or two until my parents get here..."

"Okay people," Loona said, everyone looked at her. "A prince and princess are on their way here. So, we are going to get this place presentable and we are going to make an amazing impression." She ordered everyone. But she saw nobody moving an inch. "Now!" She said more angrily this time.

Everyone scattered off to get the place tidy and ready. Sir Pentious and Millie bake cookies, while Moxxie cleans around. Blitz walks in and watches everything.

Octavia sighs, putting her hand onto the doorknob of one of the Hotel's doors. "Okay everyone, it's showtime!" [She opens the door, Stolas rushes into the Hotel.

"Viaaa!"

"Hey, Dad-" Octavia doesn't get to finish because Stolas hugs her really tight like a bear.

"Oh, it's so good to see you!"

Octavia let out a strained gasp. "It's uh, good to see you, too, Dad..." She gets Stolas off of herself, and takes a deep breath. "Welcome, to the Hazbin Hotel!"

Millie pops some party poppers as a warm welcome.

Stolas walks into the lobby, looking around.

"Where's mum?.. Didn't she come with you?.." Octavia asked.

"She's at home. She said that she will come a little later. You know how she is." Stolas explained.

Octavia just nodded, understand that her mother needs to get her stuff ready.

"Oh, Blitzo." Stolas said, notcing Blitz. "Are you helping my little girl?" He asks, then he turns threatening. "You better be."

Blitzo froze, one hand halfway to his mouth with a cup of coffee. "Heh... Y-yeah, totally helping! 100% devoted to the cause, big guy!" He said with his usual forced grin, glancing nervously at Loona for backup.

Loona rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah. He's been... Super helpful." She said flatly, crossing her arms.

Stolas' glare softened instantly. "Wonderful! I’m so proud of you, Blitzy! Helping my precious Via with her dream!" He clapped his hands together, feathers fluffing with excitement. "Oh, I knew you had it in you!"

Blitzo blinked. "...You did?"

"Yes! Stolas replied with a dramatic flourish. "Deep down beneath the self-loathing and chronic avoidance issues, there beats the heart of a very capable imp."

Loona muttered under her breath. "Wow, that's generous towards him."

Octavia exhaled through her nose, trying not to smile. "Okay, okay, let's not make this weird, dad, please. I really do want to show you what I’ve been working on. This place is-" She gestured to the slightly polished lobby, where Sir Pentious and Mocxie were frantically trying to hide cookie crumbs under a rug. "is the foundation of something big. Something that could change everything between Heaven and Hell."

Stolas tilted his head, curious. "Oh? Do tell, my little star."

Octavia walked him toward the center of the lobby, where a messy whiteboard full of diagrams, angelic runes, and coffee stains stood. "The Hazbin Hotel's mission isn't just redemption, it's reconciliation. I’ve been trying to find a way to prove to Heaven that demons and sinners can change. If I can just talk to the right people, someone above Adam, then maybe… Maybe they'll see reason."

Stolas’ smile faded a little. "Via… Darling, that's very ambitious. But Heaven has never been particularly reasonable."

Octavia's mood drooped slightly. "I know. But that's why I need you and Mom. You have influence, connections! Someone up there has to listen if a Goetia shows up."

Before Stolas could respond, a voice echoed from the doorway. "Did you seriously start without me?.."

Everyone turned as Stella walked into the lobby in full dramatic fashion, feathered cape, jeweled crown, and a smug grin. Her heels clicked sharply against the floor.

"Mum!" Octavia said, both surprised and slightly panicked. "You actually came!.."

"Of course I did," Stella said smoothly, sweeping her daughter into a hug. "I couldn't let your father have all the glory of showing up first."

Stolas sighed. "You look radiant as always."

"Don’t push it," Stella warned, brushing past him to survey the hotel. "Hmm. Cozy. Smells like desperation and cleaning chemicals."

"Thank you!" Moxxie called proudly from behind the front desk.

Stella blinked. "That wasn't a compliment."

Octavia rubbed her temples. "Okay, okay, focus. Mom, Dad, if we can pull this off, it could save everyone here. And maybe... Maybe even prove to Heaven that not all of Hell deserves to be wiped out."

There was a long pause, both Stella and Stolas looked at each other.

Finally, Stolas stepped forward. "If it means helping you, Via, then I’ll do everything I can. I'll talk to old contacts. Maybe even find a way to reach someone higher."

Stella crossed her arms, thinking. "This is insane. Dangerous. And completely beyond our jurisdiction..." She looked at Octavia. "But I have to admit... It's bold. And maybe that's what Hell needs right now."

Octavia's eyes lit up. "So you'll help me?"

Stella smirked. "Let's just say you’ve convinced me to consider it. For now."

"Yay." Octavia cheered. "But how will you do it?"

"I can ask King Lucifer, we get along quite well," Stolas explained, thinking about it. "Once he hears it's for you, he might consider it."

"Oh- Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Via cheered and ran up to hug her parents.

"But, we won't be able to go with you." He said.

"I'm sure I'll be fine." Octavia said.

"Good luck, my little owlette." Stolas said, and with that, him and Stella turns into their demon forms, before disappearing away from the lobby.

Shortly after they left, Loona walked over to Octavia. "This next part is going to be scary. You ready?"

"I'm ready," Octavia exclaims happily, and hugs Loona. "Because you'll be with me."

"In spirit, right?" She asks, hoping that she doesn't need to actually go.

"Nope. In Heaven." Via corrected.

"Uh... Yay!" Loona's face winces.

"I'm gonna go pack up!"

Chapter Text

Alastor and Lucifer were walking out of the Morningstar's palace. Something definetly happened in there...

"Look. I'm sorry for having to move our date earlier. I have an engagement this month, it was an emergency." Lucifer explained, walking next to Alastor.

"When this happens, I complain about it. You know that." Alastor replies. "But, do you really need me to be here for you, just for some farm party bullshit?" He asks, shaking his head.

"I know, it's shocking." Lucifer said. "But Prince Stolas is too busy with helping his daughter with stuff, he loves his child, and you know that I love my daughter too, so I can't let him not visit her as a father." He explained. "He's one of the only Goetia's who's actually likeable for me." He added, mumbling.

"Uh-huh." Alastor nodded, rolling his eyes.

"And The Harvest Moon is a very special event! Charlie and I once went to one of them, and she liked it. So I took the opportunity to be the one showcasing it instead of him," Lucifer smiled and did little jazz hands. "It's in the Wrath Ring."

"Wrath, huh?" Alastor asked. "So it's in a different ring? Then we can't go." He shook his head, sliglty glad that he doesn't have to go with Lucifer.

"Yeah..." Lucifer sighs. Then he realizes something. "I just realized! I'm still the King of Hell! So," He does a little wave with his hand towards Alastor. For a moment, nothing happens.

"What was that for?" Alastor asked, looking down at Lucifer in confusion.

"Congrats! You can now travel rings with your workers!" Lucifer cheered, smiling and closing his eyes. "Courtesy of yours truly." He bowed, taking his hat down. The he looked back up to Alastor. "You're very welcome."

Alastor's smile remained on his face, but he looked at Lucifer, still in shock. And he blinke. "Excuse me?.."

"Consider it... Special access from me~" Lucifer purred, and leaned up to Alastor.

"Look, I told you, we're not bodyguards." Alastor shoved Lucifer away a little. "Okay? That was a one-time thing, and we still fucked it up."

Lucifer recovers from the shove and stands up properly, fixing his hat that almost fell off.

"I'm simply offering you a free day of fun!" He explained. "I feel quite safe with you already, so I believe that you and your little pals should come with me too."

"Well if you promise this isn't some fuck fest invite," The deer demon pointed a finger at Lucifer accusingly. "it does sound like it could be fun."

"Yay!" Lucifer clapped his hands together happily. "I'll get you guys a place to stay at!"

Meanwhile at the office, Angel, Husk and Vaggie were doing their own things, altough, they were confused as to why Alastor wasn't in the office yet.

Vaggie was eating her food, when her phone rang, she saw that it Alastor was calling her. "Hey. Why aren't you here yet?"

"Heeey, I hope I didn't disturb you, I'm just with Lucifer here." Alastor explained.

"Oh. Now it makes sense why you aren't here." Vaggie responded.

"Anywaays. How would you and the others react if I told you we can now travel rings?"

"We what?" Angel asks.

"Stop listening in on peoples conversations!" Vaggie told Angel, before speaking into the phone again. "But yeah. We can what now?.."

"We sort of have to go with Mister King of Hell here because he wants to feel safe and all of that. So he granted us some special bullshit." Alastor explained again. "You wanna come along?.. I mean. Not like you can say otherwise."

Vaggie sighs. "Last time we went with the royal family anywhere, it ended up with Lucifer breaking down crying."

"But it will be different now!" Lucifer said, snatching the phone from Alastor's hands. "Promise! Besides, Charlie seems to like you! And she's coming with us too, she'd be even happier if her first real friend came along!"

"I guess... Fine." Vaggie accepted. "Let me just ask Angel and Husk."

"You're the best, my dear!" Alastor replied. "Call me once they told you their answers!" And with that, he hung up the phone.

The asassin's van pulls up infront of a ranch. They all get out and are welcomed by two imps, Lin and Joe.

Lin waved at the group. "Well, I'll be damned. The Morningstar himself actually showed up."

Joe squinted, crossing his arms. "You weren't kiddin' when you told me about this, Lin."

Lucifer grinned, brushing a bit of imaginary dust off his coat. "No need for formalities." He waved his hand.

Alastor stepped forward. "Ah, charming company, I see!"

"Please don't start narratin' again." Husk muttered under his breath.

Angel looked around, unimpressed. "So this is the Wrath Ring?.."

"Anywho... Thank you two lovely imps for letting us stay in your home." Lucifer said.

"It's no trouble." Lin replied. "Anything for the royal family. And their... Bodyguards?.."

"Not exactly... But it's a maybe." Lucifer replied. "You see, I'm here to showcase the festival."

"I thought Prince Stolas does that?.." Joe asked.

"Oh, you know... He was busy with his daughter. So I took over for him." Lucifer explained, all nonchalant. "Anyways. These are my favorite people."

"Greetings." Alastor leaned down and, like the gentleman he is, shook Lin's hand. "Alastor, pleasure to meet you. Quite the pleasure."

Lin blinked a few times at the unexpected gesture. "Well, aren't you just fancy." She said, laughing a little.

"Why, thank you. I do not need to try." Alastor's grin widened, voice dripping with theatrical charm. "One must maintain a standard."

Joe snorted. "You're gonna melt in that suit by midday."

Angel chuckled, folding his arms. "Please, he'll melt before he ever admits he's uncomfortable."

"He didn't wanna wear anything other than his suit." Vaggie commented flatly.

"Oh, don't be silly," Alastor replied cheerfully. "I thrive in every environment!"

Lucifer's eyes gleamed as he looked at the imps' house. "Now then! Where's the lovely staging area? I'm thinking fireworks, banners, maybe a float shaped like my face-"

"-Please don't do that." Vaggie interrupted flatly.

Lucifer blinked at her, then smiled wider. "Fine, our faces. Team spirit! Yay!"

Husk rubbed his temples. "Why did I agree to come again?"

"Because I promised free drinks too." Lucifer said.

"Oh..." Husk muttered. "That'll do it for me..."

"And these right here are Husker, Angel Dust," Alastor introduced his two workers. "And Vaggie!" He said her name with much more joy than when he said Angel's and Husk's names.

"Heeey." Angel said, waving his hand at the pair of imps.

Their conversation was interrupted when they heard horse hooves clop rapidly on the ground.

"That's our new help, Striker." Joe explained.

The group looks at the direction, and they see an Imp wearing a cowboy hat rides a black hell horse with a fiery mane. The horse leaps over a fence. The horse rears up and roars in front of the group.

The imp tips his hat in greeting, a stalk in his mouth. "Well, howdy!" Striker gets off the horse and walks towards the group.

Alastor tilted his head, intrigued by the swaggering imp before them. "Well, well," he said, his grin widening as Striker approached. "A dramatic entrance! I do love a good show."

Striker smirked, his sharp teeth glinting. "It ain't no show." He glanced around the group, sizing them up. He reached his hand towards Alastor, who ended up shaking the imps hand.

"What're y'all doin' so far away from the Pride ring?" Striker asked, taking the stalk out of his mouth.

"We're just visiting for the festival." Lucifer explained, walking next to Alastor. "I am here to fill in for Prince Stolas." He motioned to himself. "He couldn't make it."

"Y'know... You boys should enter the Pain Games!" Joe said.

Alastor looks over to Joe. "What games?"

"Every harvest festival, there's a competition to be the roughest, toughest bastard in Wrath!" Joe explained.

"Wouldn't it be unfair?" Vaggie asked. "They're sinners. Death by a simple object doesn't really affect us, unlike you Hellborns."

"It would make the games more interesting, little lady." Striker commented.

Vaggie raised an eyebrow at him, crossing her arms. "'More interesting?' You must mean suicidal."

Striker chuckled, tossing the stalk back between his teeth. "Ain't much difference 'round these parts, sweetheart. Wrath's all 'bout showin' what you're made of."

Angel smirked, leaning on his elbow against Husk's shoulder. "Oh, I love showing what I'm made of." He gestured to all of his body. "Unfortunately, it's mostly glitter... And something sexy."

"Yeah," Husk muttered, shrugging him off, "and none of that's gonna help you in a fight."

Lucifer's eyes lit up like fireworks. "Ooooh, but it's a competition! That sounds fun!"

Vaggie groaned. "Lucifer, we're supposed to just watch the festival. Not get torn apart in it."

"Oh, nonsense!" Lucifer said with a grin. "It's called the Pain Games, not the Die Games. It's all in good sports!"

"Though, that'd be kind of unfair if Vaggie played in the games." Angel commented. "She's still an ange-"

Vaggie slapped her hands onto Angel's mouth to shut him up. "We talked about this. We do not reveal stuff about each other in public!" She said through gritted teeth.

Angel blinked, eyes wide as he mumbled through her hand, "Mmf- fine! I get it, jeez!"

"You're a what?.." Lin asked.

"Nothing!" Vaggie said quickly, pulling her hand back. "He was just being... Angel Dust like usual."

"Which means stupid." Husk added flatly, taking a drink out.

Lucifer smiled knowingly. "Well, whatever you are, Maggie, you'll be the best audience member!"

"Lucifer," Alastor interrupted, chuckling lowly, "you're getting that look again."

Lucifer blinked in confusion. "What look?.."

"The one where you forget we're not starring in a Broadway production."

The Morningstar gasped, clutching his chest. "Perish the thought! Everything's a stage, Alastor! And you," He poked him in the chest "are my favorite co-star."

Alastor brushed the poke aside with a chuckle, his smile widened a little. "Careful, Morningstar. You might make people talk."

"Oh, let them, I couldn't care less." Lucifer purred, leaning up to Alastor's face.

Everyone was looking at the two.

"Are you two gonna... Like... Fuck now?.." Angel asked, a smug smirk on his face.

"Do we have to join?.." Vaggie asked. "Because... Uhm... I just did my nails, and I don't think blood goes with black!" She said, trying to come up with an excuse.

"You think blood cares what color your nails are?.." Husk muttered.

"Actually, black goes perfect with any form of blood." Angel said. "Any form. Really. Black, red, blue, gold-"

Vaggie glared at Angel to make him shit up on that last part. "I'd rather just watch." She said, still through gritted teeth.

Striker laughed, folding his arms. "You folks sure talk a lot, are ya'll sure you'd survive?" He laughed.

"Oh. We would!" Lucifer said, pointing his cane at the imp. "You're forgetting who you're talking to! I survive a ton of things."

Alastor chuckled, folding his hands behind his back. "Now, that I can appreciate about you."

"Lucifer, this isn't a vacation anymore, this is a suicide pact!" Vaggie snapped.

"Speak for yourself, Vags," Angel said, checking his reflection in a compact mirror. "If there's cameras, I'm in."

Striker suddenly stepped closer to Alastor. "You'll fit right in, fancy boy. Just don't trip over your own smile."

Alastor stared at the imp, for a moment, nothing happened. Then he bursted out laughing.

"Oh- You think-?" Alastor began, but laughed, then he leaned into Striker's face threateningly. "Trashtalk me again, and you will die."

Striker's grin faltered for just a moment, a flicker of unease were in his eyes. But then his smirk returned.

"'Careful there, fancy boy," he said, his voice low and steady. "Threats like that usually end with someone bleedin' in the dirt, even if they're an Overlord."

Alastor's grin only widened. "How delightfully promising!" He clasped his hands together. "It's been ages since anyone's threatened to kill me without screaming first!"

Lucifer, standing between the two, clapped his hands once. "Okay, gentlemen, let's channel all this murdery foreplay into the festival, hm? Save the theatrics for the audience!"

Vaggie pinched the bridge of her nose. "You're actually encouraging this?"

Lucifer winked. "Of course! What's a festival without a bit of tension?.."

Angel chuckled, leaning toward Husk. "Tension, huh? That's one word for it. Kinda hot, actually."

"Christ," Husk muttered, "it's way too early for this." He took another swig from his flask.

Lin, still standing beside Joe, looked between all of them with a raised brow. "You sure they're gonna survive this?"

"Oh, we'll survive," Vaggie muttered. "Whether or not we want to is another question. I'm more worried for everyone else. Lucifer will kill everyone if one of us dies." She said dryly.

Joe gave a low whistle. "Well, that's... comfortin'."

Lucifer turned to them with his usual radiant grin. "Don't be so dramatic! I'm here to celebrate, not annihilate..." He spun his cane once. "Maybe if someone really ruins the mood. Then maybe just a tiny bit of annihilation."

"Of course," Vaggie muttered. "Because murder's your version of a bad Yelp review."

Angel giggled. "I'd kill for that kind of power, literally! Imagine it: one-star date? Boom! Smited!"

Husk just grunted. "You already blow things up enough."

Lin clapped her hands once, breaking through the mounting chaos. "Alright, y'all. Save this all for the games. The festival prep's this way."

As they walked, Alastor tilted his head, taking in the fields, the faint rumble of laughter and shouting in the distance. "Charming," he hummed. "It's like stepping into a different century."

"Try the wrong one..." Husk muttered.

Striker shot a sideways glance at Alastor. "You talk like you've never been dirty before."

Alastor's grin didn't waver. "I prefer civilized filth. It's more... Refined than dirt!"

Vaggie sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "We're so gonna fucking die here..."

"Eh. What's the worse that could happen?" Angel asks, shrugging. "I think I can do this."

"Yeah. You can so dying right, you mean." Husk 'corrected' him.

Later, everyone went around to see different stuff. Alastor went off to see the different stuff the imps sold, and he managed to creep some of them out. Husk and Angel found some imps to talk to, Lucifer was getting ready to go on stage to start everything. And Vaggie was just walking around the place.

She was just walking around, looking at different stuff, when she bumped into someone, which caused her to fall to the ground, and she looked up to see a tall imp woman.

"Shit. Sorry." The imp held her hand out to help Vaggie up, who took her hand.

"No need to be. I wasn't paying attention." Vaggie said while fixing up her hair. When she noticed a bag. "What's that?" She asked, pointing at said bag.

"A dead body." The imp said, nonchalantly.

"Fuck... I promise I won't tell anyone. On my life-" Vaggie began, but the imp cut her off.

"Nah. I don't kill randomly." The imp said. "Name's Sallie May." She introduced herself.

"Vaggie."

The two looked at each other for a little, then they silently just decided to walk together.

After a few minutes, they came face to face with Husk and Angel.

"Oh hey, Vags! You finally found a friend?" Angel asked.

"Ya' can say that." Sallie May just shrugged.

"We're friends now?.. We've just met." Vaggie commented, she was npt againts the idea, but it was weord to say they were already friends.

"That's how it works for meh." Sallie May said.

"Okay... Cool..." Vaggie nodded her head.

"Good for you, kid." Husk muttered under his breath.

"What was that, Husky-poo?" Angel asked, leaning closer to his boyfriend.

"I said 'Fuck you, Angel'!" Husk 'corrected' himself.

"Yeah, sure~"

"You work with them?.." Sallie May asked, pointing to the pair, and looking at Vaggie.

"Yup." Vaggie nodded. "They're cool once you get to know them, really."

A few hours later at the Harvest Festival. Another imp, Wally Wackford stands on stage with a microphone and speaks dramatically. "Welcome, I say-a, welcome-a... all to Wrath-a Ring's-a annual-a Harvest-a Moon-a... a-Festival! To kick things up, we have the great King of Hell, Lucifer, here to usher in this Pain Games!"

Lucifer takes the microphone from Wally. And he chuckles. "How kind, Wackford. Greetings, Wrath Ring Imps! I hereby welcome you all to another year of celebrating your labor that continue to feed the citizens of Hell! Which I must thank you for." He says, laughing a little. "I'm happy to kick off the start of these games that will challenge the toughest Imps to show their skill in dominance. And this year, the challenges are gonna be harder. Sinners are also playing this time. So... I guess... Good luck to you all!" Lucifer then waves at Alastor. "Yohooo."

"Ugh. Fuck me." Alastor mutters under his breath.

"I bet Angel's gonna get trampled so much." Vaggie commented.

A gun goes off and the games begin.

The games didn't really look bad. Obstacle courses, racing, tug of war, wrestling. It was relatively normal for a game called 'The Pain Games'. But for some odd reason, Angel ended up on last place, which did not add up, he has the advantage, he was a sinner, stronger than imps are, sure, Angel wasn't the strongest, but he had strenght, and normal weapons can't even harm him either.

"I say, I say, for the first year ever, we have a tie for winner of the Harvest Moon Pain Games!" Wally says into the microphone.

Lucifer takes the microphone from Wally. "The winners are... Striker, aaaaand the best sinner ever, Alastor!"

Alastor walks onto the stage and stands next to Lucifer.

Angel, Husk and Vaggie watch from the bleachers.

"Alright. I get it." Angel says, while he has scars all across his face. "I shouldn't have played. Stop giving me that look, Vaggie."

"Yeah riiiight. I wasn't even giving you any looks though..." Vaggie said. "I'm just gonna go and find Sallie... Why couldn't you just listen to me? I will never understand." She stood up and walked away.

"Singing is what I'm awesome at doing anyways." Angel said, pointing at himself with all four of his hands. "Who needs some stupid games to validate you anyways? And I think it's just-"

"I'd like to take this opportunity to sing a quick song I wrote just now, about me winnin'." Striker said while strumming a guitar he pulled out.

"Oh, WHAT THE FUCK?!" Angel yelled, and crossed his arms with a pout.

Alastor arrives and sits next to Husk and Angel at the bleachers. "Isn't this guy just neat?"

"It's a false statement." Angel responded.

"It's gonna be nice workin' with him." Alsstor says while he pulls out a severed finger from his pocket and he eats it.

"Working with him...? WHAT?!" Angel yells.

"Yeah, it's worth a shot you know?" Alastor explains. "Besides. If he does anything wrong, Vaggie can just kill him."

Angel looks at Alastor in slight shock. "Why would you do that?! That guy was shoving me around during those games on purpose! And nobody paid attention to it!"

"I think you've had enough of this for today." Husk said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Let's head back to that house and get you cleaned up. Okay?.."

Angel looked at Husk in slight anger, but he sighed and calmed down. "Fine. Yeah. You're right... Let's go."

The two made their way back to the imps' house, the festival noise fading behind them slowly.

"I still don't get how Striker managed to win againts me!" Angel complained.

"To be fair, you are shoveable sometimes." Husk replied. "But yeah, it is very weird."

"I don't really get it..." Angel muttered. "I'll be right back... You can just go back to everyone if you want... I'd like some privacy right now."

"Are you sure?.." Husk asked, Angel just nodded. "Alright... I love you." Husk said, and he walked out.

After watching Husk leave, Angel went upstairs and into the bathroom, after knocking to check if anyone was inthere, of course. Once he got out of the bathroom, he notived some light shining through the bottom of a door. "The fuck?.."

Angel went up to the door and opened it slowly. He notices the light coming from a box. He walks over and sees a rifle with glowing designs in an open gun case. He ran his hand along the side of the rifle. "Carmine-Crafted Blessing-Tipped Rifle?.." He muttered. "How the fuck does someone like him get his hands on one of these?.."

"Why don't you ask the owner?"

Angel turned around to see Striker leans against the door frame behind him.

"Shit! Why do you even have this? You do know this thing kind can kill-"

"Demon royalty?" Striker cut Angel off."

"Yes. That." Angel responded, pointing a finger at the imp.

"No shit," Striker flicks his wheat stalk away. "That's the point of it." He runs his claws along the door. He closes the door and walks menacingly towards Angel.

"Okay. Well I'm concerned by the fact that you own this thing. And I'm also glad my instant dislike of you has been-"

Striker suddenly grabbed him by the throat. He wraps his tail around Angel's neck. He tosses the sinner hard against the wall. He chokes him on the floor as Angel tried to fight nack. But Striker manages to hold him down. Angel kicks the table and the lamp crashes into Striker.

Outside, Vaggie was talking with Sallie, but then she heard the crash that happened inside the house.

"I'll uh... I'll check out what happened." She said, excusing herself to go.

"It's fine. Probably an accident." Sallie said ,waving her hand. "I'll wait."

Vaggie nodded and ran inside the house.

Back inside, Angel stood up and ran toward the door. He pulls the door open but Striker roughly pulls him back by his tail. He covers the spider's mouth and begins to strangle him. He chuckles evilly as Angel begins to lose consciousness.

"You are pathetic." The imp said. "An imp can beat you this easily."

But that victory didn't last long, Vaggie appeared behind Striker and hit him on the head with a bottle, which caused him to let go of Angel.

"Why didn't I bring my spear?" She asked herself, then began to stab Striker in the arm several times. She then takes out a hand knife and leaps onto his back and holds it at his neck, but he breaks from her hold and stops her at the last moment.

Striker then slams Vaggie off against the wall. But she quickly gets back up.
Vaggie stumbles to her feet, panting. "You picked the wrong house to start fucking around in." she growled, pulling a small blade from her boot.

Striker chuckled darkly, spinning his revolver in one hand, his arm bleeding from where she stabbed him. "Heh. You got some bite. Ain't half bad." He stepped closer, tail twitching.

Striker fired the gun, but Vaggie dove aside, the bullet grazing her arm and splintering the wooden wall behind her.

Vaggie picked up the lamp cord from the floor and threw it over Striker's arm, yanking it back. The revolver clattered to the ground. She kicked it away and tackled him into a table. "You don't get to kill any royal."

Striker snarled, flipping her off him with a strong kick. "You don't save Hell by lettin' weaklings run it!" He grabbed the knife that had fallen nearby. "Your King ain't no better than any Goetia or Overlord."

"You don't even know Lucifer," Vaggie spat back. "You're just another trigger-happy psycho who thinks murder is a revolution!"

"You ain't any better." Striker commented. "That golden blood on ya' I see?"

Vaggie froze for a moment, her hand instinctively flying to tue wound on her arm to cover it.

Striker smirked. "Thought so. Ain't no sinner bleeds gold. You're an angel, ain't ya'?" he hissed, voice low and venomous.

"Shut. Up." Vaggie lunged forward, swinging her knife.

"Ha! Thought so," he taunted. "No wonder ya' travel with that Morningstar. One fallen feather protectin' another. It's pathetic!"

"You don't know anything about me!" She said, ducking under his next swing and slashing upward. The blade tore across his shoulder.

Striker's tail snapped around Vaggie's ankle, yanking her to the ground. He stomped down on her wrist, forcing her to drop the knife. "An angel down here's got more reason than anyone to wanna end his reign."

Vaggie looked up at him in sheer anger. "You're just another coward."

Striker replied with nothing. He just grabbed both of them by their hair and tossed them down into a cellar. "I'd kill y'all, but I feel like there's more leverage with your fuckass boss if I don't! Plus, you ain't worth a cleanup."

Angel runs up the stairs, but Striker closes the cellar doors. He tries to push the doors, but they won't budge.

He runs down the stairs to Vaggie in concern. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Are you okay?! You fucking leg's broken!" He explained, looking around to try and find anything to help his friend with.

"I'm fine! I have felt worse when my ex tore my wings out." Vaggie laughed at the memory. "You just have to get out there, and fuck up that cocksucker for me!"

"But I can't break through it. I'm not strong enough to do it." Angel said, running his hand through his hair.

"Not with your hands. Pull our what you're good with!" Vaggie replied.

"You think I'm not good with my hands? Have you even heard what Husk always tells you?" Angel retorted, offended, and not understanding what she actually meant.

Vaggie eaises an eyebrow with an unamused expression.

"Ohhhh. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Pull out what I'm good with. Yeah..." Angel realized it. And then... He pulled out a pistol from his chest fluff, and fired a hole in the door. He pushes them open. "I probably should've thought about what you said..."

"You know I love when you joke around, Angie. But fuck you for being dumb!" Vaggie replied, trying so hard not to drop her smile after what Angel just said a moment ago.

Outside on the stage.
"My dear commoners of the Ring of Wrath! I," He laughs to himself a little. "King of Hell, Lucifer, hereby curse this year's harvest with the glow of the true Harvest Moon."

The clouds swirl as Lucifer creates a portal. The portal reveals a glowing orange full moon in the sky. The crowd oohs in wonder.

Meanwhile in the house. Striker chuckles darkly as he aims the rifle at Lucifer's forehead. But a clicking sound stopped him before he can do anything.

"Excuse me? What the FUCK?!"

Striker turns around and sees Alastor holding his pistol.

"Radio Demon, I thought you were still at the ceremony!"

"You thought I wanted to stand around with a buncha hillbillies excited about corn, and I can't even eat a single one of them?" Alastor explained.

Striker slowly stood up. "Huh. And now you seem disappointed in me."

"I'm not a fan of someone I offered a job to about to off my easiest ticket to Earth behind my back. I need that guy with me for more reasons than one." As Alastor spoke, the light bulbs flickered. "I do enjoy a good brawl, but killing Lucifer tends to ruin my mood too!" Alastor said cheerily. His shadow stretched out. "You see, when someone tries to assassinate my dear old pal Lucifer, it tends to becomes very, deeply personal!"

Striker stands up and walks up to Alastor, and he pins him to a wall, which, let's be real, Alastor decided to humor the imp, heck, he even bends his knees a little to seem smaller.

"Ooh, now this is what Angel usually calls hot." The deer man commented.

Striker growled, his breath hot against Alastor's ear. "Keep runnin' that mouth, fancy boy, and I'll tear it right off your face." His claws pressed just enough to draw a thin trickle of blood from the Radio Demon's neck.

Alastor chuckled lowly, the sound crackling like static. "Mmm, now that's the spirit! But you see, my dear Striker, there's a difference between talking tough and actually surviving me."

In an instant, the air around them went cold. The lamps nearby flickered and warped with distortion. The static buzzed louder, crawling into the ears of every nearby imp. Striker stepped back instinctively, rifle in hand again.

"I'm all in for a good power struggle too," Alastor went on, his grin widening unnaturally as his pupils thinned, "but I don't take kindly to being betrayed before the first handshake has even settled."

Striker's smirk faltered for half a second, but then he grinned again, sharp and wild. "Heh. Figures a showman like you'd talk a big game. Guess we'll see if there's more to ya' than just noise." He fired his gun.

Alastor looked unbothered, he just moved his head slightly to the side, the bullet almost hitting his eye. The deer demon looked at it with mild amusement, then gently flicked it aside. "Cute trick. Noone has managed to hit me with a bullet this close before. But you're in my frequency now, cowboy."

The shadows lunged. Striker barely dove aside as a silhouette of antlers appeared around him. He froze in place when he heard a click. He looks back and sees Angel with a rifle.

"Took you long enough, Anthony! Ha-HA!" Alastor laughed then, kicks Striker in the stomach. "Wow, you should've seen your dumb little face! You really thought you could fight me." He continues laughing.

Striker snarled, staggering backward from the kick, clutching his gut. "You son of a-" Before he could finish, Angel cracked the rifle against his jaw.

"Language, sugar," Angel hissed, cocking the gun again. "Wouldn't wanna be rude in front of an Overlord."

Striker wiped blood from his lip. "Tch. Shoulda known this'd turn into a damn circus."

"Oh, it already was one," Alastor chimed, stepping closer, his shadow still slithering across the ground like ink. "You just tried to shoot the ringmaster." His grin widened even more. "And that makes you the clown."

"Keep talkin', pretty boy," Striker snarled, raising his revolver again.

Alastor looks down to see the revolver. "Wow... Cliché much?"

Striker points the revolver at Angel, who just blocks the bullet with the side of the rifle. Alastor leans down and bites at Striker's arm, who shrieks back in pain.

"Hmm... Tasty." Alastor commented. Then the antlers on his head grew slightly. He then elbows Striker in the face. But he just slams Alastor into Angel, both of them falling to the floor in the process, Angel sees the rifle on the floor and reaches for it. Striker steps on arms with his boot.

"You dumb fucks lost the upper hand fast, huh?"

"Ugh. Where the fuck did Vagatha dissapear?" Alastor asked. "She'd kill this imp.

"He broke her leg." Angel replied.

"He..." Alastor began, his eyes showing anger now. "What?!"

Striker's smirk widened at the reaction. "Yeah. Your little wingless friend put up a fight, I'll give her that. But she ain't walkin' right for a good while."

For the first time that day, Alastor's grin flickered. It wasn't gone, just became tighter, sharper.

"That," Alastor said slowly, his voice layered with distorted frequencies, "was a mistake."

Striker took a step back, tail twitching. "Oh, don't start actin' all righteous, fancy boy. She's still breathin', ain't she?"

Alastor's shadow began to rise, stretching across the room until it loomed over Striker like a massive, antlered silhouette. "You hurt one of my employees," he hissed, every word echoing like a dozen voices through a broken speaker. "And I take that very personally."

Angel blinked, glancing up from where he'd been trying to pry Striker's boot off his arm. "Oh, shit..."

"Stay back, Angel," Alastor said, his tone dark but controlled. "This one's mine."

Before Striker could raise his revolver, black tentacles lashed out. They wrapped around his arms and yanked him upward, pinning him to the side of the wall. The imp struggled, but the darkness only coiled tighter.

Striker spat, blood running from his mouth. "You think scarin' me with parlor tricks makes you powerful? I've taken down worse than-"

Alastor snapped his fingers. At that motion, Striker's revolver crumbled to ash in his hand.

"Let me correct your little delusions," Alastor said, stepping closer. "You've taken down lesser than me. But I am not lesser."

Striker strained against the shadows, baring his teeth. "You really think the King of Hell gives a damn if I blow your head off?"

Alastor leaned forward, his grin sharp enough to cut. "Maybe not. But I do. And that's what you should be afraid of."

A harsh crack filled the air as the wood behind Striker splintered from the force of the shadows. The imp groaned in pain, but his defiance didn't waver.

"You're gonna have to kill me first." Striker spat.

"Hmmm... Tempting." Alastor said with mock cheer, tilting his head to 'consider' the offer. "But alas, alas, etc. Etc. The King might frown upon me for making a mess on his big night." He turned away, snapping his fingers again. The shadows vanished instantly, dropping Striker to the floor.

"Besides, you are not worth the cleanup." Angel leaned down to give a smug smile to the imp.

Striker narrows his eyes and he shoves the sinner aside and heads toward the open window. "You'll regret not killing me."

A few hours later, Alastor was hugging Vaggie's head while Husk was bandaging up her leg, oh yeah, he was too busy protecting of Lucifer while Alastor was not there.

"Oh, my dear! I am so glad that you are fine!" Alastor said, hugging Vaggie close and brushing her hair with his hand. "You will be alright! Just don't go into the light!"

"Al, my leg's broken. I was not stabbed." Vaggie responded, trying to shove Alastor off from herself.

"You better not die." The deer demon ordered her. "The only one who has the right to kill you is yourself." He explains, hugging Vaggie closer.

At this point, Vaggie just gave up and let him hug her, while letting out a sigh.

"Let's just head home." Husk commented, already opening the car door.

Alastor scoops Vaggie up and places her into the car. What a fine gentleman.

"Why didn't you actually kill him?.." Angel asked, looking at Alastor.

"Oh? Should I have? Yes. Did I want to? Also yes. But, if he remains alive, I can torture him."

Back at the Pride Ring, Lucifer entered his palace. "Charlieee!" He exclaimed happily.

Charlie walks by, listening to her music, "Hey... Dad."

"Where's your mom?.." He asks her.

"In the dining room." Charlie replied flatly, then walked away. "I think she's angry..." She mumbled under her breath.

"Okay sweetie! Thank you! Love you!" Lucifer said, walking into the dining room.

Lilith was drumming her fingers on the table impatiently while on the phone.

"You better not fail me! I want this prick dead! I don't care who you have to go through, MAKE IT HAPPEN!" She yelled into the phone. After getting an 'Understood', she hangs up the phone.

"Hey, Lili!" Lucifer greeted his wife happily.

Lilith stared at him in anger.

"Did I... Do something wrong?.." He asked.

Lilith took a deep breath to calm herself down. "No... Someone just made me incredibly mad."

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll get what's coming for them." Lucifer replied, still smiling. "Love you, Lili!" He waved to his wife and walked out of the room, unware of his wife's angry glare towards him.

Chapter Text

Someone is pointing at a monitor screen.

"Right there! This was the first sighting." An agent said.

"They are definitely from Hell. They must use this dark magic to cross over into our world..." A second agent replied. "And they seem to be killing specifically targeted people. But, why?.."

"They always attack at random, aaaall over the country. There's no way to predict where they'll show up next!" The first agent said.

A loud clattering noise is heard from outside, followed by a stock angry cat sound. The two agents immediately glance over to a barred-up window obscured by heavily damaged blinds. The first agent makes a gap between the blinds to the outside to see what made that noise. The agents then see the source of all the racket: Alastor, standing on a box and a dumpster while holding the dumpster lid open. He looks around suspiciously.

"Ahhh, well... That's convenient." The second agent commented, as agents one and two smirked.

Outside, Alastor is standing on trash bags and holding a dumpster lid open.

"Shhhhh! Remember, we can't be seen." He ordered his employees. But he slams the dumpster lid loudly, but then he falls backwards into a pile of trash bags. Angel silently chuckles at his predicament, then walks away.

"Sorry for saying this, but currently, you're being the loudest out of any of us." Husk commented.

Alastor jumps up out of the garbage pile covered in trash; he has an old newspaper on his forehead. "I said shuuush your pie hole, dear Husker."

Husk steps away from his boss for a short moment, as he notices a portal opening behind him. Vaggie is on the other end and Angel jumps into it happily, waving to Husk, he begins to walk towards the portal, when suddenly...

"GET DOWN!" Alastor yelled and tackled Husk to the ground, barely missing a net being shot their way.

Agent One cocks his net launcher, readying another capture net. Alastor looks behind him and sees Agent Two jump down on a rope from a building, landing in front of the portal.

"VAGGIE! CLOSE THE PORTAL!" Alastor yelled.

"Wait, no!" Angel tries to run through the portal before it closes, but fails.

Husk, upon seeing the portal close, is distraught at first but quickly shifts to angry, pulling out a pistol in an attempt to fight off the two agents while Alastor hides off. Husk jumps off a wooden pallet to dodge both a tranquilizer dart and a capture net and prepares to fire. However, he is hit in the neck from behind by a tranquilizer dart. He stumbles, mumbling incoherently, then falls to the ground.

"Husker!" Alastor grabs Husk, knocking down the trash can he was hiding behind, and runs away with him. He smacks Agent Two in the face with Husk and keeps on running through the alleyway.

Husk was feeling very weird, and his eyes looked at two directions. "I can hear... the air..."

Alastor eventually reaches a dead end. The agents waste no time in cornering him. The radio demon raises his gun, ready to fight them off.

"Back off, you tuxedo-wearing FUCKS!"

Him and the agents both ready their guns and prepare for a firefight. But just as Alastor is about to fire, Agent Two pushes a button on her gun, causing both sinners to be electrocuted. Husk is shocked out of Alastor's grip and he is zapped a second time from residual charge, dropping his gun and going down for the count.

Agent One chuckles confidently. "I'd like to see the suits at corporate callin' us losers now! That was pretty badass!"

Agent Two cocks her gun. "Super badass!"

Down in Hell, Angel furiously punches the wall, tears in his eyes and making vicious demon screeches, before falling to his knees devastated.

"SHIT! Shit, shit, shit!" He curses, and starts crying. He wails with his head and hands on the floor.

Vaggie stares at him in shock, not knowing what to do to comfort him. Angel suddenly stands up, startling Vaggie a bit.

"What are you doing sittin' there?! The boys are in trouble! Open it again!" Angel ordered his co-worker.

"Al was using a total of zero swears, sarcasm, or flair. That means it was serious," Vaggie pointed out. "which means I don't open it until-"

Consumed by rage and worry for his partner and boss, but mostly for his partner, Angel grabs Vaggie by her shirt and yanks her up to face level.

"Open the fucking portal, now!" Angel yelled, his six other eyes under his main two opening slightly.

"You do realize that we'd need guns and gears. Right?.." Vaggie asked.

"Right..." Angel nodded, calming down and putting Vaggie back down to the floor.

They both start gearing up for a rescue mission. Vaggie opens the portal again, and Qngel leaps out and lands in a pose while Vaggie steps through nonchalantly.

"They aren't here!..." Angel looks around, dropping his axe he was holding, and falls to his knees again, tears welling in his eyes. Before he can start crying again, Vaggie grabs and lifts him up.

"They went this way..." She explained.

"How do you know that?.." Angel asks in desperation.

"Angel senses I guess..." Vaggie just shrugged it off, dropping Angel in the process of doing so. "Come on... Let's find our dumbasses.

They both start running towards the location of the two.

Meanwhile, in an unknown location, Husk wakes up and looks around groggily. He notices that both him and Alastor are tied to chairs. Husk panics and briefly struggles to get out, until Agent Two grabs the lamp over their heads and brings it close to Husk's face, causing him to flinch away.

"Finally awake, huh, little fella?" Agent Two asked, releasing the lamp. "Your partner has been for a while now."

"Look, it takes a lot to keep me down, alright?" Alastor explained. "So-" He suddnely flinches as the lamp is shined in his face by Agent One.

"Tell us, demon scum! Who do you work for? Satan?!" Agent One asks as Agent Two grabs the light again. They begin grabbing it back and forth as they interrogate the two sinners.

"Satan and Luci aren't even the same with us..." Angel whispered, which caused him and Alastor to quietly giggle.

"How did you get to our world from the afterlife?!" Agent Two questioned.

"Why are you killin' humans?!" Agent One asked again.

"When did you show up here?"

The two agents stop passing the lights as Alastor decides to interrupt the two agents.

"Okay, I'm gonna stop you right there. First of all, we just woke up from a veeeery nasty shock. Literally. And I'm still feeling a little woozy right now," Alastor explained. "so, I'm gonna request you fetch us some coffee before we get into this. I mean, everyone gets coffee in those movies with scenes like this, especially the ones my rival makes, am I right?"

"Rival?" Agent Two pushed the lamp back into Alastor's face.

"Fucking... TV bitch..." Alastor cursed under his breath, and used his antlers to smash the light bulb.

"Fuck..." Agent Two cursed.

Agent One ran out to activate 'some emergency back up lights for shit'.

Agent Two leans up close to Husk's face while One is out. "If we have to, we are willing to resort to torture methods to get answers outta you nasty hell beasts!"

"When you say 'torture', do you mean physical or psychological? Physical seems counterproductive; we would likely tell you anything if it meant an end to the pain, and you would have no way of knowing what was true!" Alastor commented.

"Or we might like it too much. And then you've got a whole new thing to deal with." Husk added, smirking smugly.

Agent One returns to the room, and he instantly points accusatorily at Husk. "What do you mean by that?!"

"So you're stupid, huh? I can work with stupid. Daddy Husky likes dummies." Husk commented, living in one house with Angel really taught him how to be flirty.

Alastor squirms in his chair, trying to hold in his laughter, he never wants to admit that he liked the joke, but he ended up laughing anyways. "Good one, friend! 'Daddy Husky', hah! Bet that's what Angel calls you!" He commented, raising his eyebrows knowingly.

"Angel who?" Agent One asked with a dumb look in his eyes. "It must be an angel from Heaven!"

"You two better stop laughin' at us!" Agent Two ordered.

Agent One grabs Alastoe by the collar of his suit. "Yeah!" He pulls an amused Alastor closer. "You are the ones at our mercy!"

"It's hard to resist, I'm really sorry. I mean, considering your approach thus far, you've had us tied here for what, hours?" Husk commenrs. "And you haven't even had us confirm what exactly we are!"

Agent Two leans down to face Husk curiously. "What are you then?"

"Not a Virgin! That's for sure!" Husk says, with a smug smirk.

"HAH!" Alastor laughed.

Agent One froze for a moment, his brain visibly buffering as the words processed. Agent Two pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed deeply.

"Ohhhhh, a smart guy, eh?!" Agent One shook his head. "They sent sex jokes at us! What do we do?!" He turns to Agent Two.

"I know what to do." Agent Two said. "One more quip outta you and we'll shut you up!" She grabbed Husk's shoulders.

"Ooh, someone's getting kinky." Husk comments.

Both agents recoil in shock and horror.

"WHAAAAT?! We aren't playin' into your vile demon kinks!" Agent One yells angrily.

"I mean, that's what it sounded like back there, you sickos." Alastor says.

"Please don't give them ideas, boss!" Husk said sacrastically, while trying to play coy.

"Stooop! We are" Agent One leans towards Husk, pointing at him. "NOT gettin' kinky!"

Agent Two grab Agent One and pulls him back. "Calm down, One! Don't let these monsters get to you!" She yelled. And the two agents start to walk away.

"Heyyyy, aren't we gonna get our telephone calls?" Alastor inquires.

Agent One leanes down slightly to look into Alastor's eyes. "Well, that entirely depends! Who are you gonna call? Hmmm?"

"Your father, maybe."

"Nice try, demon!" Agent Two began. "His father's not in his life!"

Agent One starts crying into his own arm.

Outside of the D.H.O.R.K.S. building, two guards armed with naginata stand outside the entrance. Four security cameras loom over their heads. Angel and Vaggie peek around the side of the building, looking for a way to sneak in.

"This where they ended up?.." Angel asks, looking up.

"I think so. It looks more like a dump than an office." Vaggie nodded. "But it does look intense. How are we gonna get in?.."

Angel keeps looking up and sees a small vent over their heads and points at it. "Think you could fit inside?.." He asks.

Vaggie raises her eyebrows, but she looks at the vent, and with sizing up the vent with her hands, she nods. "Yeah, pretty well actually."

Angel picks her up the instant she said those words, Vaggie opens the vent and crawls inside. She opens the side door from inside the building and lets Angel in.

"Nice one." Angel gave thumbs ups with all four of his hands.

They sneak through the halls trying to find the cat and deer, completely unaware that a D.H.O.R.K.S. guard can see them on the surveillance camera. The guard spits out his coffee in surprise, unintentionally soaking another guard, and sounds an alarm to alert the other guards of the trespassers.

Vaggie and Angel come to a halt upon seeing a bunch of agents holding several Japanese melee weapons. An agent holding a naginata runs toward Vaggie and Angel and swings it at them. They instantly duck, avoiding the blade. Vaggie jumps up, swings the axe, chopping off an agent's leg while Angel shoots him twice with twin pistols.

Vaggie throws the axe at another agent's face where it sticks. Angel climbs the agent's body and removes the ax from his head, jumps to avoid yet another guard's katana swing, then chops the katana-wielding agent in two vertically.

Vaggie runs into an agent with twin nunchaku and attempts to split kick him, but he avoids it. She then rolls back and jumps to avoid his strikes. An agent swings his kusarigama at her, but Vaggie just ducks low to the ground, allowing the nunchaku guy to be decapitated instead. Angel sneaks up to the now surprised kusarigama-wielding agent and snaps his neck, and as he falls to the floor face first. Vaggie then grabs Angel who then grabs the axe from the floor, running towards another set of three agents inside a large doorway.

One agent hits a button attempting to stop the pair by closing the blast door on them. The other two reveal their shuriken and proceed to throw them at the two, though they miss entirely.

"Throw me!" Vaggie commands Angel.

Angel does as said, as he picks up and throws Vaggie quite easily.

Holding her axe in front of her, Vaggie flies toward the group of agents, landing with a roll just as the blast door labeled 'CAUTION BLAST DANGER' closes behind her. Screams of agony can be heard as Vaggie slaughters them. The blast door opens back up to show Vaggie surrounded by dismembered corpses and blood splattered on the walls and ceiling.

Angwl,walks into the room, impressed. "Damn! You did good for a little girl."

"I'm only like... A few years younger than you!"

Meanwhile, Agent One yells at Alastor while he responds by playfully sticking his tongue out at him.

"Stop insultin' my father!" One yells at the deer sinner.

"Hey, hey. Let's just leave them here until they feel like talkin'." Agent Two said.

The two agents exit the room, slamming the door behind them. Alastor glances at the door just to be sure, then immediately tries to struggle in his bonds for a couple second before giving up with a sigh.

"Don't worry, Husker. If we keep being obnoxious, they'll eventually slip up and we'll get a chance to get out. Let's just keep fuckin' with them until they get so frustrated, they stop thinkin' clearly. It usually works."

"Can't you just use your powers to bust us out of here?" Husk asks.

"I would. But I enjoy this a tad bit too much too. And because I got electrocuted too. That still hurts." Alastor explained.

As Alastor speaks, Agents One and Two watch them through the screen, unbeknownst to the two sinners.

"Hmmm! So, the demons wanna play games, huh? Well, we can play games..." Agent Two chuckles and hits a button between 'HAHA GAS' and 'BITCH JUICE'. As she lifts her fist away, it is a glowing, bright green and is revealed to be labeled 'TRUTH BOMB'.

"Heh! Yeaaah." Agent Two laughed.

Back with Alastor and Husk. Alastoris still struggling against the ropes to no avail.

"I'm just worried about Angel... He'll be on his way by now, I'm sure!" Husk says.

"Ugh, he'll be fine, Husk. It would take a roided-up hippo to take down that man when he's upset." Alastor comments.

"We've never dealt with the human government before! He's most likely in danger!"

As they speak, a green gas begins filling the room.

Alastor's eye twitches, abd he suddenly turn angry. "Do you ever honestly shut up about him?! Even when he's right nex to you, you worry! Like he's gonna dissapear if you let go of his waist!" He yells. "It's so pathetic."

"That... was oddly personal." Husk comments.

Alastor's eyes widen in surprise. "You're right! I don't know why I just let my guts spill like that."

Husi glances at the floor and sees the green gas surrounding the two of them, eyes widening in fear.

"'Oh no! They're filling this room with something!" Husk yells.

"The hell is this?!" Alastor asks. "Fuuuck. It's a truth gas. I know it!"

"Riiight. Smartass." Husk comments.

"Well, if you're so smart, ask me something specific I wouldn't normally tell you." Alastor orders his employee.

Husk tilts his head, squinting through the green haze that’s now rising up to their faces.

"Alright, deer boy," Husk said, his voice sluggish from the gas. "You ever actually like anyone, or are you just some showboat psycho who can't stand the silence?"

Alastor lets out a forced chuckle, one that sounds more like a sputtering radio static than laughter. "Ahaha! Now, that’s a silly question, Husker. I-" He freezes mid-sentence, eyes darting back and forth as the gas forces the truth out of him. "Yes."

"…Yes what?" Husk presses, raising a brow.

"Yes, I've liked people before. Liked. As in... Last tense. They all die, one way or another. It's… bothersome to get attached." His smile stays plastered on his face, but his voice falters near the end.

Husk looks at him for a moment, surprised. "...Damn. Didn't think you'd say that."

Alastor glares at the ceiling, visibly annoyed that the words escaped him. “That’s exactly why I don’t.”

The gas grows thicker, swirling like fog. Husk coughs, the effect starting to hit him harder now. His eyes flicker gold for a second.

"Your turn, cat." Alastor leans forward slightly. "Why keep working for me. You could've left. You wanted to, didn't you?"

Husk sighs. "Yeah, I did. But... Angel kept makin' me drinks, kept talkin' to me like I was still worth a damn." He grumbles, looking away. "Guess I just... didn't wanna go back to bein' alone."

For once, Alastor doesn't laugh. "How... Sentimental."

They both snicker briefly, though their laughter sounds weary.

The two suddenly start crying hysterically. Once again, the two agents watch them through the cameras.

"Oh, God, Husk! I've always lied to you! I don't care about your soul! I just wanted to beat you in that poker game!" Alastor admitted.

"And I actually like your Jambalaya! I just say that I hate it to make you feel miserable!" Husk also admitted.

Agent Two chuckles. "This is gonna be a gooood night!"

Alastor coughs and he sees the room wobble and distort, changing into something else. He shakes his head and turns back to face Husk angrily.

"Dammit!" Alastor cursed under his breath.

"Al?" Husk asks, also seeing the room distort.

Husk wakes up in a place, and he stands up, the ropes falling away from him, and he walks forwards into purple fog. As he walks into the fog, and his outfit changes into something classically appropriate, and the cat looks around in confusion.

Husk coughs. "Alastor? I- I can't see you! God, this smells awful! What's that music? Is that you? Is this a prank? Because I swear to Lucifer-!"

Husk's rant is interrupted by a figure behind him standing at an organ at the top of a staircase that slowly pans into view. The other figure appears to be Alastor dressed like Jack Skellington.

"IT IS NO PRANK!"

"Why do you sound like that?!" Husk asks.

The hallucination Alastor plays a note. "Because YOU, my precious little bitch boy are feeling like you smoked too much weed!"

The shiny organ pipes act as a spotlight and points at Husk, who flinches. He then grabs a candelabra and ascends the stairs, beginning to talk-sing.

"No! What?! How could this be?!" Husk begins. "And why am I talking in rhymes? I hate this, it isn't me!" He complained. "I've never tried acid, shrooms, or DMT! It's a bad trip! Of course, this would be your fault! I can't bear this! It feels like a flip! My lungs are full of honesty! Would you promise me that you won't judge me?"

"Yeeees!" Hallucination Alastor dramatically plays his organ again.

"Not trying to divulge too much. But, I'm in too deep. A secret I can't keep: FUCK YOU!"

"What?!"

"Typical of you! Pulling me into this zoo! 'Cause if you're here, causing frustration, I'm torturing you in your hallucination!"

Inside of Alastor's hallucination, he finds himself sitting on a chair in a strange, wasteland made of ink. He looks down and he sees that he is wearing his biggest rival's suit.

"Why?!" He asks himself.

Four globs of ink appear and float around him in swirling motions. He stands up, almost falling over backwards from the softer terrain. The red glob becomes a six-eyed monster and screeches at Alastor, dripping a bunch inky sludge on him. He looks at his hands, now coated in the red ink. The ink monster comes up behind him screaming. Frightened, Alastor stumbles and falls backward into the black ink ground.

The ink monster lands and morphs into a version of Husk. "I simply follow your orders! It isn't my fault that your orders are dumb!" The hallucination Husk explained.

"Why are you talking like that? What does that even mean?!" Alastor yells back.

"I am simply speaking plain English! Perhaps you should crack open a dictionary some time!" The Hallucination Husk explains. "And then maybe you can understand half of the frivolous things I carry on and on about on my many rants about-"

As the Husk hallucination was speaking, Alastor looks up at the three other ink glob creatures circling around them.

"SHUT UP ALREADY!"

Back with Husk.
"Why do you hurt me so?" Husk asks.

"I knoooow"

"Why must you push your friends away?" Husk looks at the Hallucination Alastor. And he starts talk-singing. "It does it seem like a recurring theme! That you alienate with your toxic routine?.. Cause you're thoughtless and cruel. And you'll end up alone!"

Back in Alastor's hallucination again. He is standing motionless while the remaining ink creatures swirl and drip in the air above him.

"Admit it, my dear boss; you don't know what you are doing half the time..." Hallucination Husk said. "And you depend on me and the others to manage your foolish flights of fancy."

"I don't need you! I can do this shit on my own SO easily!" Alastor replied angrily.

The brown ink creature grabs him by the neck and throws him on the ground. It then morphs into Angel. "You do everything so poorly alone though. Have you ever considered that you don't deserve anyone near you?.."

More brown sludge grabs Alastor and tosses him up into the air, then the grey ink creature morphs into a version of his number one enemy, Vox. "You tried the solo act. It worked for you so well! Which just proves that you don't deserve anyone in your sad little life for all of eternity!"

Hallucination Vox winds him up and throws Alastor to the ground. Alastor coughs as the pink ink creature lands on the ground, morphing into a hallucination of Vaggie. "Yet you still try to keep people with you. Until they WILL get tired of you, and leave you to live with someone better than you."

Alastor then sees a staircase forming from the ink behind him. The stairs transform into pristine white stairs with golden railings. Alastor runs up the ink-covered stairs as shiny, glowing white feathers fall onto the stairs and dissolve the ink away. He trips on some residual ink and looks up, seeing Lucifer sitting on a throne at the top the stairs getting fanned. "Are you afraid to love anyone?" Hallucination Lucifer grins at the sinner. He begins to climb the stairs on his hands and knees. Two of the glowing feathers fly onto his wrists and turn into golden shackles, while his costume turns into his normal suit with a flash of light.

"I believe your subconscious is trying to tell you that you simply cannot fathom proper intimacy, but... also crave it as well." Hallucination Husk explains. "It's rather unfortunate, considering it's often how you treat those who stand by you... such as myself."

Lucifer pulls on the chains, pulling Alastor close to him and grinning mischievously. At the bottom of the stairs where the Vox, Angel and Vaggie hallucinations are gathered around hallucination Husk as he monologues. They then turn back into inky sludge again and flu off.

"Are you worried I may have enough of it one day as well?"

"STOP TALKING, ALL OF YOU!!" Alastor yells.

Hallucination Husk gets angry and closes his fan as he dissolves into gold dust and blows away.

Back at the D.H.O.R.K.S. interrogation room where Alastor and Husk are drooling, locked in their respective trips. Agents One and Two look at them from behind the glass, drinking soda and eating popcorn.

Meanwhile, Vaggie and Angel are walking up to a three-by-four 12-digit keypad. Millie walks closer and sees that the 1 button is the only one that shows any wear, while the other buttons are untouched.

"Try 1."

Vaggie presses 1 five times. The door slides open, revealing a reception desk. The girls look to each other in affirmation and run inside. Angel runs over the desk as the door slams shut behind them.

Now that their respective trips have worn off, Alastor and Husk slowly wake up. Alastor glances up to see that the truth gas is no longer being pumped into the room. Both are silent for a moment.

"That was.. Something else..." Alastor comments to try and lighten up the mood.

Husk doesn't look at him. "Do you remember what you said to me after my first day at your company?.."

"Weeelll..." Alastor cringes at himself for forgetting.

"I remember. You told me that I did a good job and that I was a good match for you... You told me that you wanted to work with me... You took my soul, sure, but I lost againts you... It was earned, I guess... And you did say that you'd give it back if I 'I don't succeed'." Husk explained.

"I'm hard on you, because I know what you're capable of. I took your soul because it was part of our deal, I'd give it back anytime, but, I am not allowed to unless you pay all of your debt back. So just. I guess. Keep doing a good job. Okay?... You shoot and kill good, you escape things easy... You can be strategic and cold-blooded when you need to, aaaand don't expect any more compliments. I hate giving them."

"Thanks..." Husk nodded.

The two suddenly look up as they hear a muffled pounding coming from the ceiling. Angel crashes through the ceiling, landing with a pose.

"THERE'S my Angel!" Husk exclaims.

Angel runs over to Husk and Alastor and begins to untie them.

"Hmm... Quite Impressive. How did you get here all by yourself?.."

Angel and Husk have a tender reunion but are rudely interrupted when Vaggie smashes through the one-way window using Agent Two as a makeshift battering ram.

"VAGGIE?!" Alastor asks, shocked.

"Get your asses out here! More of those fuckers will show up!" She yells, throwing Agent Two at Agent One as he stands behind her in shock. She crouches, and leaps. When she lands, she drops her backpack and Alastor and Husk grin maniacally at each other. Angel pulls out four submachine guns while Alastor takes out his pistol, flicking the hammer.

Agent One weakly presses a button, setting off an alarm. The group turn as a few disposable mooks drop from the ceiling holding Japanese weapons, before even more slide in from the sides and encircle them. The group hold fighting poses, ready for a smackdown.

"Ooookay, I've had one too many emotions for today." Alastor complained, then he turned to the others. "Let's fuck them up!"

A fight scene starts as one agent attempts to strike Alastor with the sickle end of his kusarigama, only for Vaggie to catch it and yank hard, throwing the wielder across the room to hit an agent with a katana. A female agent attempts multiple strikes at Vaggie with her naginata, but she deftly dodges and, with the kusarigama sickle she took, and she stabs the agent through the throat. She releases the kusarigama and grabs the chain in her hands while running, wrapping it around another agent's neck and yanking hard enough to decapitate both him and the agent with the sickle end in her throat, sending both their heads flying.

Angel swings both SMGs in opposite directions, shredding through two agents charging with katanas. Bullets flying off of the metal walls, sparks flying as he spins dramatically and kicks one in the gut. "Didn't your mom teach ya' not to bring a sword to a gunfight?!" he taunts, laughter echoing through the chaos.

Vaggie slices an agent’s legs out from under him with her axe before driving it clean into his chest.

Angel fires, and uses the back of his gun to bash another agent in the jaw. He lands next to Husk, who's already emptied half a magazine into an agent's armor before reloading with a flick of his wrist.

Alastor, meanwhile, casually walks forward, his grin stretching ear to ear. "Here's a little reminder as to why you don't mess with the radio demon!" He laughs evily. And with that, he expands his tentacle tendrils outside where one smashes multiple Agents at once. "I will devour each and every one of you!"

As the two agents' severed heads fly, Vaggie jumps and twirls in the air with her axe and goes for an agent wielding a katana. He tries to block but is unsuccessful as the axe easily breaks through his sword and he is cleaved in half, splattering blood and brain matter around her. Vaggie then sees an agent with a two-handed sword running toward her, so she runs up to him and dismembers him in two quick swings. She uses her axe to deflect incoming shuriken and swings at their thrower, but he backflips away as another agent with a sword runs at her. She jumps and flips in the air and lands with a pose, then briefly clashes with the sword-wielding agent before taking off his entire lower half. The shuriken thrower makes a second attempt, but he is easily cut down.
Vaggie stops once she spots Alastor looking down to her. "What?.."

"I am just so proud of you!" Alastor coos, and ruffles Vaggie's hair a bit. "Byey sweetheart!"

Husk unloads his guns before throwing them as Alastor hands him two golden revolvers that he uses to great effect. Alastor, meanwhile, pulls out a knife and runs off, stabbing one agent to death while decapitating another. He quickly conjures up a camera and takes a picture of the severed head.

"Seriously?" Vaggie asks, while ripping of a head.

"Yes. It's for the memories." Alastor replied, then he tosses the head away.

Angel was still firing his guns until they ran out of ammo. At that, he just ends up viciously beats one agent to death with the back of one before discarding them. Alastor picks up a pump-action shotgun, fires off a shot, then hands it to Angel, who blasts two more agents with it. He and Alastor turn to each other and nod before running in opposite directions. An agent carrying nunchaku runs at Alastor but is blindsided and knocked away by the agent Vaggie just threw. Alastor turns to see Husk cut down two more agents and twirl it with a flourish. "Hey, Husker."

"Hey. Just one sec!" Husk jumps and swings, decapitating one agent. He cuts a leg off of a female agent holding sai, relieves a male sai-wielding agent of his lower torso, then twirls. Alastor appears to the side and offers him a pump-action shotgun.

"Do you need a gun or anything?" Alastor asks.

"Nah, I'm good!" Husk replies, and spins to the side, taking off the lower legs of a female agent with kusarigama then eviscerating her. He leaps onto another female agent, wrapping his legs around her neck and decapitating at least two more agents. Husk then severs the leg of the agent he's held onto, who then collapses.

"How about some water then?.." Alastor asks, offering a bottle.

"Sure!" Husk replied.

Husk snaps the agent's neck. "Thanks, Boss!"

"No problemo."

As Husk runs off to murder even more agents, Alastor pulls out a submachine gun and a shotgun.

"Oh, how much I missed this carnage!" Alastor laughs maniacly.

"Why don't you just use you pow-" Vaggie was about to ask, but Alastor put his finger on her lips.

"It's much more entertaining this way." He replied.

Agents One and Two are attempting to flee the building. The grenade explodes, and they duck and cover their heads in fear. They then see the corpse of an agent hit the floor, a femur sticking out where his leg should be and his katana falling down and impaling him in the chest.

"Good God! Why are we only usin' weapons from Japan's Edo Period?!" Agent One asks, panicked.

Agent Two grabs Agent One by his suit. "Hey! The Edo period was badass, and you know it!"

"Dammit, you're right."

"LOOK OOOOUT!" Agent Two yells. And she pulls Agent One down to the floor down with her.

Vaggie turns around firing her rifle at more agents. She fires at agents offscreen as Agents One and Two pull themselves along the floor towards the exit. They are stopped by an agent's freshly severed head landing in front of them. An agent with twin nunchaku runs at her only for limbs and blood to spatter, one nunchaku-wielding arm comically flying up to the ceiling like a helicopter before falling to the floor.

Husk stands on a pile of agents, blasting the agents with his shotgun and screaming bloody murder. He flips one agent into the air with his tail, causing him to spin, then he blasts him away. More agents run at him, only for Husk to flll them with buckshot.

"Bitch."

Alastor suddenly appears next to him. "Hey."

Startled, Husk drops his shotgun and it lands on its buttstock, accidentally going off but hitting an agent in the crotch. The unfortunate agent weakly reaches a hand up at Husk.

"Ohhh, wow. Really goin' for the dick there, ain't'cha?" Alastor smugly asks.

"What can I say? They keep comin'." Husk replies.

"Hah!" Angel laughs while tearing the limbs off of another agent.

"Here, I got it for you." Alastor says, using his tentacle tendrils to stab the Agent and splatter his blood everywhere. "Eugh."

"Are none of you hurt?" Vaggie asks, running up to the three.

"Nope." Alastor replied.

"How's THAT for demon scum?!" Husk yells, laughing, getting stares from the other sinners. "What? Can't I act like not myself for once?.."

"Eh. It's actually hot." Angel replies.

Agents One and Two are hiding under a desk, Agent Two nods at Agent One, signaling him to hit a red button next to him that is labeled 'RED BUTTON', causing alarms to blare.

"Come on! Let's blow this place up!" Alastor yells, him and Vaggie run for the exit. Husk picks up Angel off the ground and they join the rest of the group.

Before they can leave, the doors close in front of them. A set of iron bars lowers in front of the doors.

"Quick! Open the portal!" Angel yells.

"Shhhit! I can't... I can't read the spell in this light!" Vaggie looks up at the others, worried.

Alastor searches himself for more weapons but comes out empty-handed. "Looks like we've now we're out of badassness."

Agents One and Two walk infront of them menacingly.

"Ha! You demons aren't goin' anywhere now!" Agent Two mockingly said. "Let's start with killing the lady."

"Oh yeah. Ladies first after all." Agent One added.

At that, Alastor's eyes widened, and his smile hardened, his ears plopped back a little in anger.

"Don't you dare." Alastor growled angrily.

Alastor's antlers grew slightly as he stepped in front of Vaggie. His shadow stretching unnaturally across the room. Husk, Angel, and Vaggie instinctively moved closer behind him.

"You'll touch her over my dead body!" He snarled, his grin sharp.

Agent One raised his weapon, but Alastor's shadow wrapped around the agent’s legs and yanking him forward with a bone-crunching crack. The agent went down screaming.

Agent Two got up and lunged at Vaggie with a blade, but Husk spun around, twirling the golden revolvers in his hands. He fired both shots, simultaneously disarming and knocking the agent off balance. Before she could recover, Angel slammed into her from behind, sending her crashing into a wall.

"What part of 'Over his dead body' did you not understand?" Angel asked, staring down at the Agent in anger.

"I can protect myself just fine." Vaggie commented.

"We don't care." Husk responded.

Before the anyone can do anything again, they begin noticing strange things around them. The gang's shadows growl and meld into a beast.
A screen suddenly turns on and flickers, rattling around aggressively before turning off, then showing the agents' reflections and the four-eyed silhouette of a being who wasn't there before. The agents are startled as the screen breaks off of the wall, falls at their feet and slides away. Two more screens then break off of the wall while the rest shudder and display static.

"Who daaares threaten my little sinners?"

"Who said that?!" Agent One asked as the agents look at the floor, where lines appear coming towards them. Another monitor bashes Agent One in the face, removing his shades and knocking him to the floor. He turns to look at Agent Two. "Agent Two?"

Agent Two doesn't answer, as her head is spasming, her eyes wide, and red, her mouth slack in shock and horror. Around her, dead bodies stand up, eyes completely black and empty. Agent Two tries to stop her head spasming with her hands but fails. The black-eyed bodies kneel. Agent One stands back up, his shades returned to his face, and attempts to approach Agent Two. She removes her own glasses and her head twists around to look at Agent One. She now has sharp teeth, bloodshot eyes, and her mascara has formed sharp streaks down her cheeks.
"What's the matter, demon hunter? Never seen a REAL demon before?"

The dead bodies draw a summoning circle around Agent Two in their own blood, which is now dripping from their eyes and mouths. She chuckles maliciously, eye twitching and nose bleeding. Agent One looks on in terror as Agent Two's head whips back to its normal orientation. Her eyes have rolled back. She throws her head back and vomits shadowy sludge and feathers.

Agent One and the gang watch as the shadows coalesce into a giant snake monster. The shadow beast approaches the two agents, screaming and roaring at them as they huddle together out of sheer horror. It pulls back and turns into a figure with wings, and eyes on it's suit, while the two main eyes are glowing red. It turns into noone other than Lucifer, looking at the agents with disdain. He turns away from them and clicks a button, shutting off the alarm and the red light as well.

The series of doors start to open, as Lucifer walks up to the gathered group, stopping in front of Alastor.

"Lucifer? Wha-... A- Wh- Hold on, how did you know that we needed help?" Alastor asks.

"I have my ways, darling." He steps closer, pulling Alastor down by his suit, gazing into the deer demon's eyes as he places a hand on his cheek. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Alastor replies.

Lucifer stares into his eyes softly. "Mm. Good." He caresses Alastor's head. But he suddenly pulls his hair a bit roughly and his tone turns sharper and angrier. "Now. How the FUCK. Did you get caught by humans?! Hm?! Are you not being careful up here?! You know, if you-" He boops Alastor's nose. "get in trouble, I get in trouble! WE-" He grabs the sinner's cheek. "do not want that! Now do we?!"

Husk pulls Lucifer's hand away from his boss' cheek. "They... caught us off guard. That's all."

"Yeah, you can just calm yourself, my dear. It's not gonna happen again. Got it?" Alastor responds.

"Luckily for you most people don't believe the words of the demon-obsessed lunatics." Lucifer says calmly. "They are seen as kooks!" He giggles and looks actually happy with himself. "Kooks! Such a silly word!" He claps his hands together. "Now! Let us all go back home!" Lucifer then opens a portal back to the the demons' office.

"Yes, please. I'd like to get back to the correct hellhole as soon as possible." Angel whines and hops through and helps Husk also get through, and Vaggie walks into the office building, looking at the book.

"Am I going to get any thank you for the rescue, Bambi?" Lucifer asks, turning to Alastor.

"Fine. Fine. I'll take you out to a 'candle-light dinner' tonight." Alastor rolls his eyes and slumps his back.

"Yes! Fuck yes! Haha!" Lucifer cheers. Then closes the portal once the both of them step through it.

Back at the D.H.O.R.K.S office, Agents One and Two watch as they leave. "So... What now?.." Agent Two asks. Agent One looks excited.

"What now?!" He walks off to the computers. "We finally got the evidence we needed to be taken seriously!" He pushes some rubble away before typing on the keyboard.

Four monitors go from static to showing security camera footage of the events of the last few minutes. Agent Two walks up and the two agents put their shades back on, smiling confidently. "Nobody in corporate is ignorin' this." Agent One chuckles victoriously.

Chapter Text

Vaggie is otside of a bus stop, looking out at the road and checks the time the bus is supposed to arrive.

"It's usually here by now." She mumbles, sratching her head in confusion.

Once the bus finally arrives, she does a little haply dance, and then sees the person she was waiting for step out of it.

"Charlie!" She exclaims, and runs over to hug her.

"Hey..."

"You finally made it. But what took thus long?.." Vaggie asks.

"The bus just ran late..." Charlie mumbled. "'That's all."

"Come on, I got the whole day planned out for us."

"Really?.." Charlie asked.

"Yup. We're gonna go to the spa, arcade, get coffee. And much more." Vaggie lists off, taking her phone out. "Where do you wanna start?.."

"We could... Start with a day spa..." Charlie replied. "Mom usually takes me to those places, but only when she wants to..."

Upon hearing that last part, Vaggie's eyes widened a little, then her smile returned. "But, luckily for you, she's not here. Now come on! Let's enjoy this day together." She takes Charlie's hand and heads off to a direction.

Once arriving at the spa, the workees dropped everything they were doing when they saw Charlie, and took them to somewhere.

Soon after that, the two are laying in bathtubs filled up with mud, and holding fancy glasses of wine in their hands. A worker is buffing Charlie's right hands fingernails.

"Do you come here often?.." She asks, looking at Vaggie.

"Well, no. I came here once when Alastor wanted me to relax, he says 'Your blood pressure will rise if you don't'," Vaggie explains. "It's actually really relaxing."

"Uh-huh... I like it too." Charlie smiled a little.

"What do you wanna do after this?.. We could get food, or new clothes?.." Vaggie suggested.

Once everything was finished, the two girls went inside the store besides the spa.

"Alright. What do you wanna go for? Pastel colors?" Vaggie holds up a few stacks of clothes. "Warm colors? Really bright colors that will hurt your eyes?"

"Maybe something... Gothic?.." Charlie whispered.

Vaggie looked at Charlie for a second, then she smiled. "Gothic's perfect! I love it already!"

"How about..." Charlie looked around, then took out a black dress with white spots on it. "This one?.."

Vaggue looks at the dress and claps her hands together with a smile.

"Let's try it onto you!" She cheered, then took Charlie into a dressing room.

Later at the arcade, the two are playing many different games inside. Vaggie accidentally stabs a machine with a chainsaw while playing a VR game, they take a bunch of pictures together.

"I'm taking this." Charlie says while taking a big, pink, fluffy teddy bear, and hugging it close. She instantly blushes once she sees Vaggie staring at her. "What?.. Can't I have secrets and hobbies?.."

Vaggie smiles and shakes her head. "It's just too adorable..."

The two laugh while leaving the arcade.

The two soon leave and arrive at a park in the city, with some drinks.

"See? Best day ever, right?" Vaggie asks. "I told you you'd enjoy yourself. You needed a break from home."

"Yeah. I guess... I needed time outside of the palace..." Charlie mumbled, hugging the bear. "One day isn't even enough to do all of this..."

"I'm really sorry for everything that happens..." Vaggie puts a hand onto Charlie's shoulder. "I'm here for you, every moment, you can just... Call me."

"I think I'd like that." Charlie says and takes out her phone to write Vaggie's phone number down.

They both look up into the sky as they sit on a bench.

Later that night, they get into a movie theatre and grab some popcorn to watch something.

"I'm really glad to have you in my life now..." Charlie whispered, looking at Vaggie. "You know... You could come to a party with me." She says out loud.

"I don't know. I don't like parties." Vaggie replied.

"Come on, it's gonna be awesome." Charlie said.

Vaggue looks at Charlie, and sighs, deciding to give in with a nod. "Fine."

Chapter Text

Octavia is packing clothes into a suitcase while Loona sits on the bed, looking troubled because Octavia is overpacking a lot of things to the point she has a closet-sized suitcase, a guitar case, two extra large suitcase luggage, and a small handbag.

"Ok, I have my warm weather clothes and my cold weather clothes. I have a light jacket, flak jacket and rain jacket-" She looks around the room. "Wait, does it rain in Heaven?.."

"You're only going to heaven for a few hours." Loona commented.

Octavia just stands up and paces around a bit. "WE are only going to heaven for a day. And I just want to be prepared! It's our last chance to convince heaven a soul can be redeemed."

"I really don't wanna go..." Loona mumbled, looking away from Octavia.

Octavia walks over and takes her hands. "Loona, you're my best friend, I need you there with me."

Loona sighs and rolls her eyes. "Fine..."

"Yes!" Octavia cheers and hugs Loona.

Down at the lobby, Pentious and Fizzarolli are sitting together, Fizz is trying to teach him how to play a video game.

Millie and Moxxie walk into the lobby, Millie wearing black dress, and Moxxie is in a suit.

"Wow! How gorgeousss." Sir Pentious complimented.

"Thank ya'." Millie bowed a little.

"Oooh. Is this that anniversary shit you have?" Fizz asked, pointing at the pair.

"Actually, yes." Moxxie nods. "It's our one-year marriage anniversary. So, I'm taking Millie to Ozzie's in the Lust Ring!"

Millie gasps. "Ozzie's?! No way! That place is always booked!"

"Yeah, well I've been planning it for quite a while."

At that, Mullie jumps into Moxxie's arms and kisses his face before they both start French kissing and making out.

Blitzo walks into the lobby, and upon seeing the scene, he groans. "Ugh, can you two not?"

"I'm sorry, sir. But, it's our Anniversary." Moxxie explained again.

Octavia and Loona walk downstairs with their bags.

"Awww. Have fun you two." Octavia coos. "The portal to Heaven is about to open in..."

Just as she predicted, the portal to Heaven opens in the middle of the lounge.

"Now!" She grabs Loona with both arms and throws her into the portal, and as she steps a foot inside, she turns back to the guests and workers and waves them goodbye. "Bye guys!"

As soon as the two left, Moxxie and Millie also leave, Blitz follows them.

Fizzarolli and Sir Pentious stare at each other.

"Want to go to a party?" Fizzarolli asks.

Pentious shrugs, and they begin to also walk out.

Infront of the golden gates of Heaven, Octavia and Loona are outside as the portal closes behind them.

"Look at this place! It's so beautiful! Isn't this amazing?"

"Yup, super cool." Loona comments, sarcastically. "Heaven. Wooow."

They shortly approach the front desk where St. Peter pops up from behind his desk.
"Hiya! Welcome to Heaven! Can I get your name, please?.."

"Oh! Uhhh, uh, uh, Octavia Goetia!"

Peter opens the book of reservations that are supposed to be a list of names they've cataloging for those who are to enter heaven.

"Octavia, hmm," Peter starts mumbling names from list. "I'm not seeing you on my list here, that's so odd."

Octavia looked slightly shocked. "Uh, um, my dad's friend got me this meeting. Maybe-"

"Oh. Family friend. Okay!"

"Try Lucifer... Morning... star?" Octavia looked a bit meek.

Peter realizes who Lucifer is. "Oh, fuck!" Peter chuckles nervously. "Yeah, hoooo, hehehe. Yikes, am I right? Are you sure you're in the right place? Because I think you might be a little lost."

Peter nervously flies down from the desk to Octavia and Loona. Vaggie is unamused of St. Peter, crossing her arms in disappointment.]

Vaggie: Oh, here we go.

"No, uh... We-We're here for a meeting, and-" Octavia began, when she was interrupted.

Just then, high above the three of them, Sera and Emily suddenly appear in their angelic forms before turning into their humanoid forms as they land in front of the three.

"St. Peter. We can take it from here." Sera said. "Greetings, heir of the Ars Goetia. I am Sera, the high seraphim of heaven." She introduces herself as Emily squeals and laughs in excitement. "You are gifted to be here."

Emily runs forward to greet them. "Hi! I'm Emily, the other seraphim, though you can call me Em! Emmy, E, whatever you want, I go by whatever." She giggles. "Welcome to Heaven!"

The gates of Heaven slowly open. Octavia and Loona take in the sight of the place.

"It's so clean." Octavia looks around.

"That's kind of the whole point!" Emily cheers. "Here in Heaven, everyone is happy, all the time. No crime, no worries, no struggles. Just eternal peace and joy." She gestures to the city ahead, where angels are happily going about their day. "We've got the best community, the brightest minds, and- oh! Almost forgot! Check out our decor!" Emily gestures to elaborate golden structures. "You're gonna love it here!"

"I love it already." Octavia said.

"Yeah, no shit. It's... Okay..." Loona muttered.

"Of course, it's just temporary." Sera cut in, puttign a hand onto Octavia's shoulder. "I'm sorry you can't stay."

"Buuuut while you are still here, we hope you enjoy yourselves! Have fun!" Emily looks to Octavia and touches her cheeks. "Every single day in Heaven is a happy day!" She happily holds her hand. "You won't even wanna go back to Hell after this!"

They begin to walk away walk

Octavia and Emily run hurriedly, while Loona just walks calmly, unexpectedly passing Adam, who is drinking a soda, and Lute. They both immediately pause as they see the Hellborns.

"Holy fucking shit balls, am I seeing who I think I'm seeing?" Adam asks.

"What are they doing here? How did hellborns even get up here?" Lute also questions.

"Who cares? I'm handling this shit right now." Adam goes to challenge the two demons, but Lute stops him.

"Wait! You want to start a fight on the promenade in front of everyone?"

"Better than waiting for the fucking extermination!" He groans.

Lute immediately grabs Adam by his collar and pulls him to shush him harshly.

"SHHH. Sir, what was the Seraphim's one rule?.."

"Uuughhh, 'No one but the exorcists can know about the exterminations'. I know, fine." He slurps his drink. "Don't fucking shush me, bitch."

Just before they can settle this, Sera suddenly appears behind them both, teleporting them to an office-like building with just one sway of her wings. The light goes white on the screen before reappearing to show Adam and Lute being confronted by a stern Sera.

"You should listen to your lieutenant, Adam."

Adam turns around and looks at Sera with shock. "Fuck! Sera! You can't sneak up on a guy like that, jeez."

"Your highness, forgive me, but what are the hell-spawns doing here?" Lute questions.

"Well, you failed to control the demons' unrest, and now royals of Hell are involved, setting up an audience for his misguided daughter. I never would have agreed to your..." as she speaks, Adam slurps his drink. "'yearly activities', if I thought it would bring trouble to our doorstep. Keeping Heaven safe was my only reason for allowing it."

"What do you want from me? I'm just one guy."

"I want you to do whatever you need to do to keep this problem from getting any worse." Sera leans down to look closely at Adam. "Are we clear?"

Adam just sighs. "Yeah. Got it."

Back with Emily, Octavia and Loona, they were still walking around.

"So. I was thinking. We could go to the petting zoo first! We could go see some Thylacines! They're extinct on Earth. But we have a ton of them here in the petting zoos! The animals here even have little wings to fly around with! And they don't eat each other anymore!" Emily explained, sighing dreamily.

"Those sound so adorable!" Octavia replied. "You know... I always wanted to see a Woolly Mammoth and a golden toad!" She said.

"We have a ton of those here! Come on!"' Emily quickly grabbed Octavia's hand and dragged her away.

Loona just had her arms crossed and stared at the two, she couldn't lie, she loved seeing Via happy, but she also felt out of place in Heaven, so much. Especially when some cherubs came up to her.

"Aww. A puppy! Look, Rachel! A bug puppy!" A bee like cherub pointed at Loona.

"She's so cute and pretty! Let's ask her if we can pet her, Honey!" The other cherub replied.

"No. You can not!" Loona growled at the two.

"Aww..." The two cherubs looked sad.

"I really wanted to pet the puppy..." The first cherub said sadly.

"Let's go pet the dachshund babies!"

And with that, they flew away, and Loona covered her face in birh anger, and embarrassment.

At an angelic courtroom, Octavia and Loona sit down. Adam walks by on his way to his seat with Lute.

"Oh no, not him again!" Octavia groans.

Adam flies up and sits down beside Lute. "What up, baby? Saw that you went to my manager. Low blow, Karen."

"We are gathered here today to determine whether or not a soul in Hell can be redeemed into the heavenly realm by the means of this 'Hazbin Hotel'." Sera explained. "Princess Goetia?"

Octavia sighs. "Thank you, Seraphim." She nods and clears her throat. "Webster's dictionary defines redemption as-"

"Objection," Adam raises his hand. "lame and unoriginal."

"Sustained." Sera nodded. "No further dictionary references please."

"Right, ok, uh, uh... uhhmmmm..." Octavia shuffles through multiple cards, all have various dictionary references on them.

"If you have actual evidence, then show it to us already." Adam complained.

"Well... We have a patron right now who is making incredible progress!"

"Who?" Adam asks.

"His name is Sir Pentious."

"Who?!" Adam asks again, "Regardless. A sinner is totatlly worth redeeming." He blows raspberries at Octavia. "Plus, that shithole only has demons like you, and those hellborn dumbasses."

"Well, if you know so much, what do you think it takes for one get into Heaven?" Octavia retorts back.

"Uhmm... w-w-well... Uhh..."

"Is everything ok, Adam?" Sera asks, everyone in the room looking at Adam.

"Give me a fucking minute, ok?!" Adam scrawls something down on a golden piece of paper, before teleporting it over to the two.

Loona looks at the paper and reads itm "'Act selfless, don't steal, stick it to the man'. Are you fucking serious?" She asks.

"Uh, yeah. Sure got me here, didn't it?" He laughs nervously. "Right, Sera?"

"He was the first human soul in Heaven..." Sera explained.

"Well, I bet Pentious is doing all of those things right now!" Octavia said, crossing her arms.

For almost an hour, they all went back and forth, especially Adam.

"Well, then why isn't he here? Hm?" Adam questions, looking down to Octavia.

"Yeah, why isn't he here?.." Emily asks too, turning to Sera.

The angels observing the court all murmur together.

"Wait... none of you know what gets a soul sent to Heaven?"

Sera abruptly stops the angels around. "This questioning stops now. We know when a soul arrives, we know when they pass divine judgment, it is our job to ensure these souls are safe."

Emily conjures Adam's list and looks over it. Three things on Adam's list are crossed out. "B-But she's right! She has a point!" Emily flies up and shows the orb. "He saw the light!"

Emily flies with the orb and asks the other angels observing the court. "We all saw it!"

"It's not that simple, Emily." Sera says, as Emily flies back up to her, who takes her hands. "We can't change the fate of sinners-"

"But that's not fair!" Octavia yelled. "Can't you see that he has tried to change himself? He has not harmed anyone! Or built weapons." She listed off.

"I understand that you wish this could happen." Sera replied. "But some things just can't change."

"We don't need change." Lute yells fron her seat. "That slimy fucker is just another sinner that we-"

"Lute, stop." Sera orders.

"But honestly, we just can't wait to..." Adam flew down to Octavia.

Sera's eyes widen. "Adam. Stop."

"Kill all of 'your people'." He laughed at the word 'people'.

"They do what?.." Emily asks in pure shock, and she flies down and lands in front of the orb, which now displays an silhouette of an exorcist standing among frames, staring sadly. "You... Kill them?.."

"Whoops!" Adam said mockingly.

"Guess we can't keep a secret." Lute added.

"What's the fuss?" Adam asked.

Emily looked up at Sera. "Sera, olease tell me that you didn't know about this!"

"I'm the older one. I thought I have to bear all of this!" Sera explained.

Emily covered her ears. "No!"

"Please, listen Emily!" Sera flies down to Emily and takes her hands. "It was hard to decide it for me too! It took so hard to..." She takes Emily's hand and forces a smile, the fire from the orb reflecting in her eyes. "Do what was required."

"And to think I could ever look up to you!" Emily tugs out of Sera's grip and flies upwards. "You don't have to protect me! I'm not a child anymore!" She turns in the air and questions Sera directly, before she lands in front of the orb next to Octavia. "But I guess it's just my fault that I believed you would heed the morals you preach."

"And that's I've been saying." Octavia said, holding Emily's hands.

The members of the court are shown to be horrified.

Sera inhales to keep composure. "I'm sorry... But this court finds that there is no evidence souls in Hell can be redeemed." She looks down to where Octavia, Loona and Emily are.

"Oh, FUCK, YES!! I WIN!!! SUCK IT BITCHES." Adam yells in victory. "You better save the date, cunts, 'cause guess what? We're coming to your hotel FIRST." Adam snaps his fingers, reopening the portal to Hell.

"What... NO!! NO!! You can't-" Octavia began.

"You... Motherfu-"

Octavia and Loona scream as they are transported back to Hell through the portal.

"Octavia! Don't give up on this! I'll figure something out, I promise!" Emily yells after Octavia.

"That was uncalled for, Adam." Sera said.

"Yeah, But did you see the looks on their fucking faces, it was.... d-d-" He starts stammering. "Sorry..."

The court, Adam, and Lute fly away.

"Extermination... Of human souls?!" Emily crossed her arms and flew up to Sera. "Demon or not there is NO reason to be doing this!"

"They were uprising, Emily! It is my position as the head Seraphim to protect our people at all costs. And it's your position to keep them happy and joyful." Sera leans forward, putting her hands on Emily's shoulders.

"How can I bring joy when I now know we are bringing misery to thousands of innocent people?"

"Heaven needs us, Emily. Everyone looks to us... And we can't doubt ourselves or worry about the fates of demons when we have our own souls to protect. Please.... If you start to question... you could end up like Lucifer: Fallen." Sera flies to Emily and holds her hands. "I couldn't bear to see you suffer that fate, so please, let me worry about this, okay?" She kisses Emily's forehead. "I'm sorry." She walks away.

Saddened, Emily puts a hand on Adam's list. "I'll help her regardless."

Chapter Text

At the office, Vaggie is a magazine called 'IMP GOSSIP' with Verosika Mayday on the front page and drinking out of a glass bottle. She places the bottle on an open page of the book Lucifer gave them, and it rolls off the table. The page of the book glows and creates a portal to the human world. A tree falls through the portal, along with a severed head.
"Woo, that was a ton of lumberjacks!" Alastor exclaims and walks into the office.

Angel crawls across the floor like a crab, with an axe between his teeth. "I'm still so fuckin' jazzed up!" He snaps the axe in half and laughs. And he walks over near the rest of the group.

"Well you better stay jazzed." Husk points finger guns at Angel. "Because, guess where I'm taking you tonight?"

"I wanna know where!" Angel yells, excited.

"I'm taking you to Ozzie's in the Lust Ring!"

Angel's eyes sparkle and he squeals in happiness, then gasps. "Ozzie's?! No way! I've heard that place is always booked!"

"Yeah, well I've been planning it for quite a while. And since we can travel there, I asked miss Princess for help getting in." Husk enplained.

Angel looks happy, but he still got one question. "But why? It's not even our-"

Husk puts a finger onto Angel's lips to shush him. "It's just for a date."

Angel squels in happiness and jumps into Husk's arms and kisses his face before they both start French kissing and making out, much to Alastor's distain.

"Ugh, can you two not infront of me?"

"I'm sorry, boss." Husk apologizes, putting Angel down.

"No, it's fine." Alastor replies, shaking his head. "I'll just be with Vaggie right here." He puts his arm around her.

"Actually," Vaggie slightly pushed Alastor's hand away. "I also have plans... You see, Charlie invited me to the Gluttony Ring." She explained. "You can come too, if you want. But it'd be a bit... Awkward..."

"No, of course, it's totally alright!" Alastor replied, and walked out of the office building.

"Anyways," Angel looks at Husk with a flirty look. "Let's go... Clean this blood off."

Husk blushes, obviously flustered. Angel drags his finger down from Husk's chest and makes a seductive purring sound as they walk off holding hands.

"Ugh. Can you not?" Vaggie asks, looking away.

Later, at an Elevator systems, Hell's version of a subway station, Angel is wearing a red dress, and Husks is wearing a black suit jack, they sit in the seats at the Elevators, when an intercom voice is heard. "Elevator 666 departing for Lust in 5 minutes."

Husk fixes his bowtie. "You ready?" He asks, offering a hand to Angel, who takes it, and they both walk off together.

Meanwhile, back at the Pride Ring, Alastor walks to Lucifer's castle, and let's himself inside.

"Lucifeer!" He cheers.

"Oh. Hey, Al." Lucifer chuckled nervously. "Why uh... Why are you here?.." He asked.

"You know, my employees are going to the Lust Ring, to some fancy place called 'Ozzie's," Alastor explains, leaning againts a table. "and my darling Vaggie is going to the Gluttony Ring with," He boops Lucifer's nose. "Your daughter."

"Oh yeah... Charlie did mention something about that..." Lucifer mumbled. "She said, she's missing her aunt."

"So, I had the thought of coming to you!"

Lucifer raised an eyebrow, and blinked in confusion. "Coming to me... For what exactly, Alastor? You planning a little... bonding session?"

Alastor grinned, letting the grin stretch just a touch too wide. "Oh, nothing like that, my dear Loo-cifer."

"Then I know what you want!" Lucifer points a finger up to Alastor's face.

"Really now?" He asked.

"Yes." Lucifer nods, crossing his arms together. "You want to... Take me to the Lust Ring too!" He cheers excitedly.

"What?" Alastor asks again, tilting his head to the side a little.

"Yeah! You obviously came to me, because you are jealous of your employees going to Ozzie's. So you want me to go with you, as a plus one."

Alastor's eyes twitch a little. Buut before he could react, Lucifer grabs his hand. "Let's get you new clothes, Bambi!"

And with that, Lucifer runs off to his room, and opens the doors to his walk in closet.

A little while later, Alastor is standing the middle of the King's room, wearing a black tuxedo, with red stripes, and a small tophat that has a little grey snake on it. "I hate this."

"Oh, Chill out, Al." Lucifer says, spinning around to reveal to Alastor that hebis wearing a white suit, simmilar to his usual one, the only differences is that he put on a... Cape, which has... Snakes and apples as prints on it.

Lucifer grabs Alastor's hand and they both walk off together.

Lucifer practically skips down the marble hall, dragging a deeply unamused Alastor behind him, who looks more like a reluctant toddler that is bored in a clothes shop.

"Must you hold my hand?" Alastor asks, trying to tug his fingers free.

"Yes," Lucifer answers instantly. "Because if I let you go, you're going to poof yourself away in a cloud of smug smoke like you always do when you get uncomfortable."

"I do no such things."

Lucifer raises a brow.

Alastor clicks his tongue. "Fine. I do, sometimes."

They finally reach the castle entrance.

"After you-!" Lucifer gestures grandly.

Alastor sighs and steps out of the castle.

One Elevator trip later, and they've arrived at the Lust Ring.

As soon as Lucifer sees the place, he rushes over to the entrance with Alastor they enter Ozzie's, Alastor looks around to find a table.

"Oh, MY! This place sure did uh... Change much." Lucifer said as he looked around. "Oh, but how romantic is this? Right?" He looked at Alastor.

A waitress comes over to their table. "Can I get you two off- I mean, start you two off with some drinks?"

"Yes actually! Maybe some apple cider could do. You know, it's a. Hah. Special occasion." Lucifer says to the waiter. Then looks at Alastor. "So. How was your day?"

"It was fiine. We killed a bunch of humans."

"Oh... Uh..." Lucifer chuckles a little. "That sounds fun! How did you kill them?"

"How? You know. With ripping their faces off." Alastor said nonchalantly. "I even kept one of them."

"Was that... A reference to anything?.." Lucifer asked, and Alastor just shrugged it off.

"A what?.." Alastor looks confused.

"Right, right... You don't know what it those are." Lucirer nods and coughs nervously.

They keep talking until music starts playing and several dancers descend from the ceiling.

"Ew..." Alastor mutters at covers his eyes.

"Ladies and gentlemen! I see some sexy faces around here tonight!" They turn to see Fizzarolli descending from the center stage. "Welcome, welcome, to Ozzie's: Lust ring's number 1 place for all kinds of sick twisted fantasies. Put on display for all you 'Sleaze' and 'Sleazettes'. The gin joint of Asmodeus himself! C'mon, give him some LOVE!"

"Wooo! I know Asmodeus! Haha!" Lucifer cheers while everyone claps.

"Eugh. Stop that." Alastor says.

"I am the one and only Fizzarolli! Some of you may recognize this dashing clown face from my numerous toy-botic replicas across the rings of Hell. Gloriously designed by the big man himself and uh," Fizzarolli rolls up a sleeve, revealing a cybernetic arm. "ribbed for your pleasure tonight."

"So, without wasting any more time, our little opening act is a fresh one! Coming at us from a little imp from the Wrath Ring, give it up for Moxxie... With no creative stage name whatsoever."

The audience applauds, as Moxxie gets up with his guitar before kissing Millie on the cheek. Fizzarolli moves from his spot to another, as Moxxie takes the stage.

"Hello, everyone-" Moxxie says, when feedback from the microphone causes him to flinch a little. "Oh!" He clears his throat. "Hi, thank you for letting me be here. It's an honor to play."

"Uh, hurry up, boy, and, uh, SING, boy! I say, I say-"

"This song is for my beautiful wife, a surprise for our first anniversary." Moxxie says. "I love you Millie." He starts strumming his guitar as he begins to sing his song.

"Huh. A love song in Lust." Lucifer mutters. "How adorable!" He claps his hands together.

During the song, everyone looks with a confused look on their face. Meanwhile, Millie is just touched by the song playing, and Fizzarolli looks at his companion hidden in the shadows with a smug look while his companion glares.

While Moxxie is singing the same "I love you" over and over, this is drowned by Fizzarolli and Asmodeus say the same thing over him, and their silhouettes start laughing right behind his back, and they appear from the smoke.

Lucifer raises his fist in happiness. "Woo! Asmodeus! Yeah!" He cheers. "Good golly! He sure hasn't changed. At all."

"Uh-huh... He doesn't look so-" Alastor begins, but looks at Lucifer, who gives him a death glare to watch his tone. "So... Not weird?.."

"Yayy!"

"Little Imp, if you came here to sing your serenade~. Well, then we got a saying that's popular in these parts." Asmodeus leans down to Moxxie to poke him.

"Only little bitches strum the strings of their hearts!" Fizzarolli says too, shaking his finger infront of Moxxie.

"You wanna hang around this lustful town? Ditch the lovey-dovey before we knock you out!" Asmodeus shoces Moxxie a little.

"Isn't this a tad bit too excessive?" Alastor asks, pointing at the stage.

"Well, that's Asmodeus for ya'." Lucifer comments. "Once you actually get to know him, he's actually a cool and chill guy." He notices Asmodeus looking at their direction, and he waves at him.

Asmodeus' gaze sweeps the crowd until it lands squarely on Lucifer's frantic waving. The towering demon freezes mid-gesture.

"Hold on a sec. Lu?" Asmodeus squints. "Lucifer?"

Fizzarolli does a double take. "Wait what? THE Lucifer? King Apples himself?!"

Lucifer beams and taps Alastor on the shoulder. "See? Someone appreciates my presence!"

Alastor pinches the bridge of his nose. "Oh, joyous day to live."

Asmodeus steps forward, looming over the audience. "Well DAMN! If it isn't the King of Pride showing up at my club. Didn't think you were the type for public outings, Lulu."

Lucifer shouts back with a bright smile. "Just taking my friend here out on the town! Isn't it wonderful?"

Alastor opens his mouth to protest the word friend, but Lucifer pats his cheek before he can.

Fizzarolli leans into Asmodeus' side, eyes sharpening with mischief. "Ooh, so the King brought a date too! A fancy one!"

Alastor stiffens. His radio static crackles a little. "I am not his date."

"Sure, sure," Fizz snickers, balancing on the stage with a flip. "Whatever helps you sleep at night, string bean."

Lucifer cackles loudly, nearly falling backward in amusement.

Up on stage, Moxxie tries to keep singing, but his voice wavers as Asmodeus' attention returns to him.

"Now where were we?" Ozzie taps his chin dramatically. "Oh, right! Us telling you how your little honeymoon lullaby is killing the mood!"

"Hey!" Millie stands up from her table. "There ain't nothin' wrong with a sweet love song!"

Fizzarolli folds his arms. "Oh, sweetheart, there's nothing wrong with love! Just not in this club!"

Millie growls and Moxxie tenses, but the crowd roars with laughter.

"He's such a limp-dick imp, really killing our vibe!" Asmodeus groans at Moxxie. "Get a load of this dweeb and his unsatisfied bride."

The audience starts to make fun of Moxxie even more.

"You were saying about him being 'cool'?" Alastor looks smug now.

"Shut up, Bambi."

Lucifer rolls his eyes and goes back to watching the performance, but Alastor can feel the imp's embarrassment. And he loves it.

On the stage, Asmodeus and Fizzarolli continue to make fun of Moxxie. That is, until Millie interrupts them by smacking Fizzarolli with Moxxie's guitar.

"I think you were trying to sing something for me, Mox." She hands Moxxie his guitar back.

"Yeah, I was. Yeah." Moxxie then strums his guitar once more.

Asmodeus rushes over and tends to a knocked out Fizzarolli.

Moxxie and Millie lean in for a passionate kiss. The audience applauds.

"Aww. How sentimental." Lucifer coos.

"You know what? Fuck this, I'm out." Alastor stands up. "Too much sex and romance for me."

"Oh. What? Why?" Lucifer asks.

"I do not like being called your date, and I do not like strip clubs." Alastor exolains, putting his hands up.

"Right. Of course... Yeah." Lucifer sighed, and walked out.

And the two of them leave the building.

Later, at Lucifer's palace.

"Thank you. You know, I enjoy spending time with you. I really did like this place." Lucifer says, trying to smile at Alastor softly. "You know, I have some wine in the house. Charlie is still out with her friend. Lilith is busy. So, we could-"

"I'm not doing anything with, or to, you tonight, okay? I'm really just-" Alastor sighs. "I'm really not in the mood."

"We could talk, or... watch a movie, or... maybe cuddle a little? I- I could show you my duck collection."

Alastor rolled his eyes. "Oh, don't act like what we have is anything but you wanting me to ne with you, okay?" He points a finger at Lucifer accusingly. "You make that really clear all the time. But, I just won't tonight."

Both of them look at each other with sad looks on their faces.

"I'm... Sorry." Alastor finally blurts out.

"Okay... Uhm..." Lucifer sighs sadly. "Then... I guess... Goodnight..."

"Yeah. Goodnight." Alastor turns into a shadow and dissapears from him.

Lucifer also teleports onto his balcony, and falls to his knees in sadness.

"The fuck are you doing?.."

Lucifer flinches slightly, then stands up to see Lilith walking up to him.

"I am... Stressing..." Lucifer replies, holding back tears.

"Well, stop it. It's annoying to see you so pathetic." Lilith comments.

Lucifer looks shocked a bit. "Why are you speaking like that?.. I mean... I love you. But you-"

"I like to remind you of what you did to me." Lilith points a finger down at Lucifer.

"But... Why?.. I... I love you, Lili. And I know you-"

"Oh, stop it already! You are nothing but a double crosser, and a flifthy cheater!" Lilith yells back. "You know, I tried to imagine all my life, what it would be like, without you. Before you left me for some... Red, deer bitch to fuck."

"Well..." Lucifer looks shocked, but then decides to talk back to her. "I tried so many years to treat you like a Goddess. And for this family to stay together. But I guess you can go out to party every night, and I have to stay home and not have one actually real friend I can count on. But sure! You can have friends. Seems like I sure can't! Judging by your logic." He does little hazz hands. "The only reason I have endure your insults nowadays is because I don't want Charlie to feel even worse about herself! Heck, I never even slept with Alastor! He's an ace in the hole! And I... Heh. Can respect that." He takes his top hat off and fixes up his hair. "And if I have to do this all on my own... Then... Then I can't do it anymore..." He says, pointing to the door behund Lilith. "I want you out of here. Now..."

"What do you mean, 'out. Now'?!"

"I mean out!" Lucifer yells angruly, his horns popping oit for a second, but he takes a deep breath and his horns dissapear. "Out of this palace, out of my life! Forever!"

Lilith's eyes widen in anger. "How dare you?!" She steps forwards, and she pokes Lucifer in the chest with her finger."What do you think the rest Hell will think?! Of what Charlie will think?! Hm?!" Her hand moves towards Lucifer to backhand his face. "And Eve too-"

Lucifer gets ready to be hit in the face, but then catches her wrist, stopping her hand before it can hit his face and cutting her off.

"I don't care what anyone else besides Charlie will think! And the only thing that I tried to do in this marriage is make YOU feel good!"

The two stare at each other intensely, until Lilith pulls her wrist out of Lucifer's grip.

"Fine. I have no desire to stay in the place of an embarrassment." She comments. "You have fallen not just from Heaven, but from what little grace you had, and I know you'll pay for it." She walks away back into the house.

Lucifer sighs, collapsing onto the balcony again, and he looks up at the sky.

Meanwhile with. Alastor, he plops down onto the couch, and tries to sleep. When his phone rings.

"Ugh. Who the fuck is-" Once he sees who it is, his eyes widen, and picks it up immediately.

Chapter Text

Vaggie is sitting in the back of a car. Her phone buzzes, and she looks down and sees Alastor trying to call her. She declines the call.

"You want me to drop you off here?" The driver asks.

Vaggie glances out the window. "Oh! Uh! Yeah. Yeah, this looks right. I, uh haven't actually been here before."

Vaggie steps out of the vehicle and she hears music from the inside, as the car drives off. She looks down at her phone and texts Charlie.
*'Hey, I'm her.' 'Fuck.' *'here, sorry :).'*

Vaggie looks around nervously until Charlie calls out to her, waving her hand. "Vaggie! Hey! I'm happy you're actually here."

"Yeah, hey. Thanks for inviting me." Vaggie replied.

The two walk into the mansion, where the party is taking place.

"Of course I would. I want you to meet my aunt! All of my friends meet her." Charlie explains. "Hey, everyone! Meet the new face!" She does a playful mock-howl in excitement, prompting everyone else to do the same. "Do you wanna drink something?.."

"Uh... Yeah, totally!" Vaggie replies, when Charlie walks away, she drops her fake smile.

Vaggie starts walking around to see all the hounds around. She spots a bunch of hellhounds, and tries to go over to them.

"Hey-"

A female hellhound with fluffy hair covering her eyes, and wearing two big earring, smiles at Vaggie. "Aw. Hi!"

"Uh... Can I... Sit down here?.." Vaggie asks, pointing at the empty seat.

"Duh. That's why it's empty!" Another hellhound, with black fur, also covering his eyes, said with a laugh.

"T-Thanks..." Vaggie nods and sits down. "I'm... Vaggie."

"Well. My name's Gigi, and this is Russ." The hound, Gigi, said, pointing to the other hellhound.

"I... Like your earrings." Vaggie comments.

"Thanks, they were a gift." Gigi says, holding a bottle. "You want some?"

Vaggie quickly shook her head. "No thanks... I have never tried... Uh..."

"It's Beelzejuice." Gigi said, then shrugged. "Your loss. But you know. If anyone bothers you, sweetcheeks, call us. And we'll handle them! You are officially gonna be protected by us!"

"Yeah!" Russ raised his fist in agreement.

"Is that... Do you really make friends this quickly?.." Vaggie asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Yup." Both of the hounds said in unison, and with a nod.

"Oookay... I appreciate it..."

A voice suddenly booms through a microphone, attracting most of the partygoers. "Haha! How're my dirty bitches doing toniiiiight? Awooh, awooh! Y'all ready to party with the Queen Bee of Glu-tto-ny? Come on!

The demon reveals herself to be none other than Beelzebub, who was twirling around the disco ball as she hypes up her audience of partygoers.

"Hell yeah! 'Cus the honey is flowin' tonight! And this bitch 'bout to get fuckin' wild! Let's get it started!"'

Beelzebub grabs onto a pole. And starts singing a song.

"That's your aunt?!" Vaggie asks once she sees Charlie returning with drinks in her hands.

"Yup. My auntie Beelzebub." Charlie nodded.

Once Beelzebub ended her performance with a firework of confetti and the hellhounds cheer.

"Awooh, awooh! Heck yeah!" She flies over the hellhounds, and spits Charlie. "Shiiit!" She yells and scoops Charlie up. "Applepie!" She cheers.

"Oh! Applepie! I love you so much!" Beelzebub hugs Charlie close.

"Auntie... Stop... I don't like hugs anymore..." Charlie tried to shove her off.

"Sooo... Who is she?" Bee asks, pointing at Vaggie.

"This is my best friend, Vaggie." Charlie grabs Vaggie's hand.

"Aww. My sweet baby finally has more friends!" Beelzebub coos.

The party is buzzin' now! Fuck!" She dusts herself off. "I feel like I went a little too hard with the confetti this time though. I have like," She materializes a mini rainbow. 'a rainbow... in my vagina right now."

"She's a fuckin' cutie! Where you been hiding girl?!" Beelzebub laughs, and pinches Vaggie's face. "It's time my little apple baby got herself a girl."

Both Charlie and Vaggie's eyes widened.

"She's not-"
"I'm not-"

"Anywhooo. I would've thrown a bigger party, but I couldn't convince Belphegor to let me break into her stash of party drugs. So fucking lame! I mean, I usually just steal them, but Belle changed the locks." She conjures a bottle of beer. "She says I'm a total jackass for trying. But, hey... I'm proud to be a total jackass." She drinks from the bottle.

"Anyway, girls, you have a good time tonight." Bee looked at the two girls again. "Get some sweets, get some eats. Drink it. Whoo." she walks over to some party guests. "Cheers, honey! Thank you for coming. Do you need anything? Are you having fun? Are you good? Are you drunk?"

A hellhound with a cone full of Beelzejuice nods in response.

"Okay, good. Okay, great..." Bee walks off.

"Yeeeah, I'm gonna go home."

"What? Why?!" Charlie asks. "It just started!"

"I..m You wouldn't like me when I party..." Vaggie crossed her arms, and began to walk out, and takes out her phone, and calls someone.

"Hey uh... Could you... Maybe pick me up?.."

And as soon as she said that, a van pulled up.

"Whqt's wrong?! Are you hurt?!" The person jumps out of the van and looks around Vaggie's face.

"Yeah I'm fine. I just wanna go home..."

"Of course! We'll go home right now."

"Woah! Look! It's the Radio Demon!" An Imp says, pointing a finger.

"Fuck! Never expected a fancy overlord like you at a party!"

"You... Know Al?..." Vaggie asks.

"Pfft. Yes! Lots of us loved hearing those overlord screaming sounds. We still re-play the saved footages for fun!" Another imp explains. "My parents still love those radio shows."

"Regardless. I'm not staying. I'm here to pick up my daughter." Alastor says, putting a hand onto Vaggie's shoulder.

"Aww maan. You're leaving already?" Gigi suddenly appeared at the doors. "Fuck. But we were having so much fun! Come on! I'm sure you'd enjoy it. It just started." She leans againts the Van's door.

Vaggie looks at Gigi, and sees one of her eyes, and sees how pretty her eye is. "I mean... Maybe we could stay a little longer?.."

"Didn't you just wanna leave?" Alastor asks, rasing an eyebrow.

"Well, these people like you! They just said that they love your radio shows too! You always said that you wanted people to know your name more again."

Alastor starts to think about it. "Hmm... Fine. But I will not drink."

"And plus... I think I owe Charlie a goodbye before I even leave." Vaggie adds, looking down again.

Just as he said that, a few minutes go by... Nothing has happened.

Seriously, nothing happened...

Maybe except that Alastor is currently condradicting what he just said. And drinking out of entire bottles, like... Maybe... 5... or... 4?... Exact number is... 20.

"Yeah! You did awesome!" Vaggie cheered.

"I... Don't think that it's healthy..." Charlie comments.

The hellhounds howl to also cheer for Alastor.

"And I am still sober." Alastor says, with a smug smirk. "Give me a real challenge next time." He leans down to a Hellhound who 'challenged' him.

"Fuckin' awesome!" that same Hellhound cheers.

Beelzebub then appears behind Alastor. "Oh, yeah? Wanna fucks with the big bitch, sinner boy? I got a challenge for ya'."

"Oh... He's gonna die." A poshy accented Hellhound comments.

"Charlie, honeypie, can you do it for me?" Bee asks, looking at her niece.

"Yeah." Charlie nods and uses her hands to put two kegs down to the floor. "From Bee's personal supply, the hardest drinks she has." she explains. "And what she never let's me drink out of..." she crosses her arms, and Bee just ruffles Charlie's hair.

"You don't have to do this... Sir..." Charlie whispers to Alastor.

"Oh, but I will." Alastor's grin turned wider, and tries to open the keg that is infront of him.

Beelzebub uses her powers to lift the kegs and prep nozzles for them. And she laughs. "Alright, shit talker, but there hasn't been a soul yet who can beat me at my own game." She smirked, and crossed two of her arms. "So, you better bring the fire, baby."

"Oh, is Queen Bee too scared to lose to someone lower on the Hierarchy?" Alastor mocked, still grinning.

"Oh, okay. Let's get it on, you little bastard!"

Charlie signals for the contest to begin, and both of them start drinking.

"Come on, Al! Fuck her up! You can do this!" Vaggie cheers.

Alastor rips off the nozzle and chugs the whole keg while two eyes closed, surprising Beelzebub, who looks at him in concern.

"Who's the queen now?!" He yells.

"Yeah! That's my father!" Vaggue exclaims happily.

"Well fuck me! That's a first. I haven't had a first in a while. Since like... Levi and Athan..." Bee muttered. "That was magical, seriously, impressive. I tip my crown to you, deer man. "She bows before Alastor. "Major respect." She howls, prompting the other party guests to cheer as Alastor passes out drunk, as he gets carried off as Beelzebub and Charlie look at each other in concern.

As the party continues, the guests continue having fun and chatting, Vaggie is laughing with a Gigi and Russ, and Charlie taps her on the shoulder.

"Hey, Vaggie?.. I don't mean to be a buzzkill here. But your uh, dad... guy dude... Is um... He's seeming a bit..." Charlie began, when Beelzebub then comes up behind him looking also concerned.

"Out of control, like... A total mess." She says.

"Yeah, it's worrisome. You wanna maybe check on him or something?.." Charlie asks.

"He's like... Causing problems on purpose. So, I feel like, you should check up on him at least... Just to see what's up." Bee explains.

Vaggie’s smile falters. She glances between Gigi and Russ, who are still laughing about something, and Charlie and Bee, who both look genuinely worried.

"... Yeah. Yeah, okay. I'll go see what he’s doing." Vaggie sighs.

"Call if you need help." Charlie whispers.

Bee adds. "Or if you need me to yeet him into a wall. That works too."

Vaggie forces a tiny smile before heading off down the hall where she thinks Alastor wandered.

She finally hears a familiar, warped static crackle coming from one of the rooms. Vaggie winces at the thought.

"Oh no..."

She pushes open a door opening slowly, only to be met with complete chaos.

Alastor is on top of a massive dining table, microphone in hand.

"And NEXT UP on tonight's festivities, THE SACRIFICE OF BAD MUSIC TASTES! YOU THERE! YES, YOU, WITH THE BAD HAT! COME FORTH."

The imp with the hat looks absolutely thrilled as he crawls onto the table.

Several hellhounds are chanting. "Radio! Radio! Radio!"

Vaggie slaps a hand over her face. "Oh my fucking God..."

Alastor beams down at her. "Ah! That's my daughter! Come join the revelry!" He almost tips off the table. Barely catches himself. Then immediately loses balance again and falls off the other side.

Vaggie rushes forward. "Al-!"

He lands, laughing hysterically. "I'm fine. The table angled itself to hit me. Rude."

"It didn’t even move." Vaggie deadpans.

The hellhounds cheer anyway.

Before she can pull him up, Charlie and Bee arrive behind her.

"Oh thank Satan," Charlie breathes. "Is he okay?.."

Bee squints at him. "He's either drunk off his ass or experiencing the best night of his afterlife."

"A little bit of both," Alastor mutters, still on the floor.

Vaggie grabs his arm. "Okay. That's it. Party's over for you."

"Noooo," he whines, actually whines, as she hauls him up. "But the peasants LOVE me!"

"You need to drink something other than Beelzejuice." Vaggie says.

"Uuuugh, no. I don't!" Alastor whines.

Vaggie carries Alastor to the van, and buckles him up, then her new friends wave her goodbye, ans she waves back, then she gets in the van and drives off.

"Do you need to throw up?" She asks.

Alastor has his arms crossedy with a pouty look on his face. "Mmm... no...

Vaggie scoffs and rolls her eyes. "Yeah, you do."

Vaggie drives them home to their apartment, she turns on the lights and puts Alastor onto the couch, then gets a glass of water and a blanket for him.

"I had a really bad day..."

"Oh yeah? Is that why you drank like five gallons worth of Beelzejuice?" Vaggie asks, smiling at the memory.

Alastor closes his two eyes. "I don't know what I'll do..."

"What?.."

"I'll just die alone. Just an old, withered, waste." Alastor muttered. "Lucifer's most likely mad at me..." He mumbled, then looked up to Vaggie. "Will you be there for me?.."

Vaggie's eyes widen a little in shock. "Be where?.."

"Here... With... Me..." Alastor mumbled.

"I'll be here for you... Dad." She drapes the blanket over Alastor and pats his head. "Now go to sleep... okay?" She turns off the lights. She takes one last look at Alastor before heading into her room