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“Let’s watch a slasher!” Saeko said with such a joy in her voice it almost made Ichiban chuckle.
“Sure,” He answered a bit awkwardly. Scary movies weren’t really Ichiban’s thing, let alone slashers. Movies where a bunch of teenagers hang around waiting to get totally slaughtered like animals? And the worst part is they’re usually a group of close knit friends and only one of them survives. One! Usually a ‘final girl’ which is a staple of the genre but that’s horrible! One girl all on her own surviving while all of her friends are left as rotting corpses? No thank you.
But it was Halloween, not just that, it was their first Halloween. Together. As a couple. A legitimate couple too! Saeko calls him her boyfriend, Ichiban calls her his girlfriend, they’re working on finding a place and moving in together, they’ve gone on dates and did things on those dates like kissing and hugging! They were a legitimate couple and legitimate couples watch movies together even if they’re scary! So Ichiban was just gonna have to suck it up and pray to the Zenith Dragon that she picked the least gory and violent movie.
“The Hannya Man 2: The Haunted Cabin!” Saeko held up the plastic DVD box up to Ichiban with pride, her newly fanged grin to accompany her vampire costume shining. The blue DVD box had the overlay of a Hannya mask with a knife over a group of teenagers with flashlights and cellphones, their faces all horrified as an ominous cabin looms behind them.
“This one is supposed to be the goriest!” Mukoda continued, “One of the actors, I think the main character, was absolutely DRENCHED in blood!”
“Cool…” Ichiban gulped down his drink with one hand and tugged on his fake wolf ears with the other (he decided to dress up as a werewolf to accompany Saeko’s vampire). The party decided to throw a Halloween party at Survive.
He tried to change the subject, “I didn’t know you could still get movies. Physically, I mean.”
“I got it online, I thought it’d make it extra special since it’d be our first scary movie together as a legitimate couple.”
She said the words so easily, sing-songy even. How could he say no to that face? Her big brown eyes full of warmth, the way her fake fangs peeked out from under her top lip, her cute little costume cape bouncing with her, she was so happy. Just suck it up, Ichiban. It can’t be that bad. It won’t be that bad.
It was that bad.
When they returned to Saeko’s apartment and she put the movie on, it was all over. The movie was about five teenagers going to a cabin during their summer vacation while a serial killer, the Hannya Man, was on the loose. The main character was a stoic, no-nonsense guy with a caring girlfriend, his best friends were an obnoxious party animal who brought along his exasperated girlfriend and an intelligent and logical dork that always called the group out on being morons.
“This the place?” asked the main character. “Looks…bad.”
“Yeah!” the party animal confirmed. “Trust me, it looks better on the inside!”
“Where did you even find this place?” the main character’s girlfriend groaned.
“He’s always doing this…” sighed the girlfriend of the party animal.
“Great. Five teenagers in a cabin in the woods, you know the Hannya Man is on the loose right? This is a slasher movie just waiting to happen.” said the intelligent and logical dork, and the rest of the group groaned.
“Oh, it’s one of those movies that’s self aware.” noted Ichiban.
Saeko chuckled, “Yeah, it gets a little obnoxious sometimes. It’s borderline fanfic writing but that just makes it all the more fun.”
“Fan…fic?”
“Right. You don’t know what that is.”
As the group of teenagers entered the cabin, the Hannya Man emerged from the bushes outside. With a flash, the tires of the teenagers’ ride were slashed. No way out. Ichiban gasped and Saeko giggled.
“You’re gasping already? C’mon, the car’s always the first thing to get sabotaged in these kinds of movies. Bet that they don’t have any signal either.”
The main character pulled out his phone, the phone case being a light grey with a red dragon. He raised his phone to the air as if showing it to the cabin itself. He pulled it back to him and sighed.
“No signal.”
“Called it! These teenagers are demon food!”
Ichiban wasn’t sure if Saeko’s joy was cute or uncomfortable. Her eyes widened as the movie continued; the teenagers were checking out the rest of the cabin, the camera being very deliberate in closeups when needed. Ichiban hated that. As an ex-yakuza, he knew that anything could be a weapon, anything. Every time the camera lingered on an object too long; an electrical socket, a counter corner, a doorknob, he squirmed in his seat. He knew what was coming but didn’t like it.
The main character’s girlfriend was checking out the bedroom she’d end up sharing with her boyfriend. The closet doors had shutters, like a window. She linger a little bit too close to the closet when the doors flew open and she let out a scream.
Ichiban stiffened.
The party animal laughed. “Haha! Got you! You should see the look on your face!”
The main character’s girlfriend huffed. “You’re such a dick! Why were you hiding in the closet?!”
But the party animal kept laughing.
Saeko laughed with him. She wrapped her arm around Ichiban’s as she pointed to the screen.
“They always do these fake-outs so early! Imagine being scared by that! You’d pass out once the real shit starts happening! Hahaha!”
“Yeah…right. The real shit.”
The real shit wasn’t too far behind. The Hannya Man sabotaged the fuse box to the cabin, so it was lights out for the protagonists.
“Let’s split up,” said the logical and intelligent guy, “try to find a light source before our phones run out.”
“Yes…” purred Saeko. “Split up! Easy pickings!”
Each member split off into various rooms; the main character went to the kitchen, the logical guy searched around in the living room, and the party animal, his girlfriend and the main character’s girlfriend went to the bedrooms. A crash of lighting and a roar of thunder. Every flash of lightning, the masked man with his knife would inch closer and closer to the cabin.
It’s normal. It’s a scary movie. It’s meant to be scary. It’s fake. It’s fiction.
His heart was beating, faster and faster.
He squeezed his hands tightly, feeling his skin get cold.
Breathing seemed harder. His throat felt tighter, tighter than ever.
Go. Run. Run away.
The murderer, the danger, is coming.
Run. Now.
Run. Now.
RUN! NOW!
Ichiban jolted from his seat, almost knocking Saeko off the couch as he forgot how close she was.
“I gotta use the bathroom!” he announced loudly before leaving the room with a hurried shuffle.
“Okay, do you want me to pause the movie?” Saeko called out.
“No! That’s fine! Keep watching without me, it'll be fine!”
Saeko picked up the remote and fast-forwarded the movie a bit to a faster part.
“Well, this isn’t going like I planned…” she thought.
A common trope; put on a scary movie so you’re forced to cuddle. It worked all the time in manga, anime and romance movies. The plan was simple; Saeko and Ichiban watch a scary movie, Ichiban gets scared, Ichiban cuddles Saeko for warmth and safety, success! Ichiban seemed so shaken up though, too shaken up. Maybe he’s playing it up? She thought. Possible. He liked getting into the spirit of the holiday, she’s seen the movie before but he hasn’t. He jumped at an obvious fakeout jumpscare, he had to be playing it up, right? If he wasn’t, she looked really bad for purposefully scaring him shitless just for some cuddles. She could’ve asked.
But, how would that have looked?
‘Ichiban, can we cuddle?’ Okay, well, it’d just look lame. Wouldn’t it?
She turned the TV off and laid down on the couch, pulling up the large quilt over her head.
Ichiban returned to the scene. He knew it well.
“Oh no, where’s Sachan?” he asked in the supposedly empty room. She giggled quietly from underneath the blanket.
He leaned down and tossed it aside.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I felt bad that you freaked out over the movie.” She sat up. “It was…sort of a ploy to get you to cuddle me.”
“What? Why didn’t you just ask?”
“Because this was supposed to be our special first Halloween together and I thought ‘okay if I put on a scary movie, he’ll get scared and cuddle me for protection and warmth!’.”
“Well…that’s pretty sound logic.”
“Right?”
“But we can cuddle without a scary movie. We can just watch a fun Halloween movie and cuddle.”
“...Okay.”
“Okay.”
They watched a spooky but not scary Halloween movie, cuddling underneath the large quilt. It was a pretty happy Halloween.
Save for the demon-masked slasher outside the apartment.