Work Text:
Bureau Ent. ✅ @B_ent
Grapes 5th Album “push and pull” is out now! Check it out now on all streaming platforms.
#Grapes #push_and_pull #Grapes_push_and_pull
— Omg??? Grapes finally released a new album? so suddenly?? omgomgomg I'm so hyped!
┖ ikr!!! i'm blasting it rn!
┖ omg… its so good!!!!
— AHHHH GRAPES-AHHH WELCOME BACK MY KING!!!
— woah, grapes-ie's voice is as good as always, i almost cried
┖ almost? i CRIED listening to it. who hurt our baby??
┖ YES! THIS!!! WHO HURT HIM???
— stream push and pull!!!
click to see more replies
Grapes #1 fan @Grapes_is_my_wifey
Grapes' newest album, push and pull, hits number 1 on all charts!
— WOOO I KNEW OUR GRAPES CAN DO IT AGAIN!
— This newest album is really Grape's masterpiece, he said that it was supposed to embody finally breaking up from a toxic relationship and omg… it really does. I can really feel the hurt and confusion and the feeling that he wants to go back but he knows that it's bad for him. Who on earth treated our beloved Grapes so badly???
— the song really is a banger and im happy that grapes finally escaped whoever he was with but the stuff he is describing in the lyrics is just straight up abuse 😭
┖ FIND THE MAN RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS AND BEHEAD HIM. NOW!!!
┖ ayo, man?
┖ you act like grapes doesnt look like he wants a man
┖ … you're right
— STREAM PUSH AND PULL!!! WE NEED TO WIN ALL THE AWARDS!!!
┖ wow aren't you guys being too greedy? don't you think that other groups also deserve an award
┖ stfu, no one cares, ur fav doesn't even come close to our grapes
click to see more replies
Baek Saheon had seen the tweets. Grapes had released a new album!!! A stream of oh my gods had taken over his mind when he saw the video preview and he made a mistake in his report that he was promptly chewed out for.
But that didn't matter, he was just so excited! He wanted to listen to it. Now. But as he searched his desk for his earpiece, he realised that— he had forgotten to charge them.
Fuck.
It was a stupid mistake that he was now beating himself up over.
No…
He buried his head in his hands.
He couldn't listen to it now?! He was devastated.
The rest of the work day was spent in a daze as he daydreamed about the new album, until it finally ended and he could rush home. He quickly packed his things and almost made a run for it.
If he didn't care about appearance at all, he honestly would've ran for it. Unfortunately, he did — he had a reputation to maintain — so he could only walk as fast as he could, catching the bus that almost left without him, and taking the stairs two at a time until he reached his apartment.
Panting, he unlocked the door and rushed in, not bothering to take his shoes off or to put his bag down. He ran over to his laptop and opened it, putting on his headphones onto his sweaty hair as he waited impatiently for it to boot up.
If you couldn't tell by now, Baek Saheon was a fanboy, a stan, a megafan of the singer Grapes.
He buys 3 of every album Grapes had released in the 3 years he had been active, had collected his photocards obsessively, and hoarded every other merch he could get his hands on, even the weird ones — Grapes had released boxers with one of his albums once and he placed them carefully into clear plastic display boxes that now reside in the underwear drawer of his wardrobe, greeting him whenever he went to retrieve or put in his underwear.
He has an entire wall lined with 5 shelves dedicated just for Grapes' merch and was overflowing with it. He was also planning on repurposing another wall for them.
If he had to say so himself, he would've been Grapes' number 1 fan if he had more money to spend on him — his office worker salary barely allowed him to buy all the merch he wanted, and he had to hide out in the toilet during office hours to fight for merch just to avoid paying scalpers for them. And even then, he couldn't buy as many as he would've liked.
He just really liked Grapes. He was so talented. His voice was angelic and could easily lull him to sleep. Yet at the same time, he could also perform powerful songs well. Baek Saheon really admired him, and it really didn't help that Grapes was also exactly his type.
Messy black hair framed his face in a way that made him look soft and delicate. Bright doe eyes that hid behind a pair of round glasses that made him look way too innocent and cute. This combination was lethal whenever Grapes did aegyo on the stage. Baek Saheon could feel his heart trying to explode in his chest whenever he did.
Ughh. He wishes that he could be one of the girls inside those wattpad stories and marry Grapes already. It was a pity that that was fiction and not the reality he wanted, so he remained a sad lonely bachelor living in a rented apartment alone. At least the apartment wasn't that bad for the price, he guesses, although he might be overpaying for it by a bit…
Whatever, all that didn't matter. What mattered was Grapes' newest album!
The laptop finally booted on after what felt like forever, and with practised motions, he opened up Youtube and went into Grapes' channel. At the very center of the channel was his newest MV that was already the number 1 trending video on Youtube and sat at over 500 million views in just 4 hours. Baek Saheon's fingers trembled to click on it. He was just so excited!
Finally, his finger pressed down, and the video began to play.
His neighbours came knocking on his door with noise complaints a few minutes after that.
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
GRAPES AHHHHHH
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
HOW CAN YOU BE SO PERFECT
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
I WOULD FIGHT SO MANY WARS FOR YOU
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
COME TO ME, I WILL TREAT YOU BETTER THAN THAT BASTARD EVER COULD
— yo, are you good???
┖ nah this is normal for him dw
No one in Baek Saheon's life knew that he was a fan of Grapes. No one, except maybe his neighbour next door, who had seen his merch collection when he was moving in. Baek Saheon hopes that he didn't know, because who knew what that bastard might do with that information?
His neighbour, Kim Soleum, was the most creepy, insane, and terrifying maniac he could ever meet. Baek Saheon didn't know what he did to offend him or why he had chosen him specifically for his… shenanigans, but from the moment he moved in, Kim Soleum had been constantly creeping him out.
Who in their right mind calls their neighbour over in the hardware store to get their opinion on which rope was better to tie someone up? Who??? Baek Saheon had bought 3 bolts for his door that day.
If only he hadn't signed a 3-year lease… he would've already moved out by now. Unfortunately, he was stuck here for another 2 years with that creepy bastard.
The worst part was that Kim Soleum never acted this way to the other neighbours, at least from what he had seen so far. He was perfectly normal and polite to Go Youngeun. It was only towards him that Kim Soleum acted up.
Baek Saheon really wanted to confront him and ask why, but…
Kim Soleum was just too scary!
One time, he bumped into Kim Soleum while leaving his apartment for work and Kim Soleum had looked like someone out of a horror movie with his messy hair and dark circles. The morning sun also gave his eyes a particular red glint to his pupils that looked terrifying when directed as a glare to him.
Normally, that was fine. He had a high tolerance for horror. But it was what that maniac said next that made him creeped out.
"Watch out for serial killers."
Who says that?! Much less to someone they barely knew?!
Baek Saheon had spent that week paranoid, flinching at every sound near him and looking over his shoulder at every corner.
Ugh… He really hated that bastard.
He also didn't know why he decided to stay in this apartment building too. Kim Soleum was rich. It was obvious from the clothes he wore. Who the hell wears Prada to the supermarket???
This apartment building was so far below his tax bracket that he had no idea why that lunatic was here. It felt like he was here just to flex his wealth to his perpetually broke ass. Baek Saheon itched to rob his apartment just to afford more Grapes merch. Maybe this way, he could finally buy enough albums to win the lucky draw for a place in Grapes' fansign. He was always unlucky and always lost the fight with the richer fans for the spot.
He honestly would've tried, if it weren't for the fact that he knew that the maniac wasn't above booby trapping his house for fun.
Seriously, that lunatic was somehow so rich that he could've bought this apartment building without batting an eye. He could've stayed in any other building but he somehow decided on this one?
Crazy bastard.
Suddenly, a realisation strikes him.
Fuck. Why did he never think of this?!
If Kim Soleum was so rich that he could easily move to any building he wanted, then it meant that if Baek Saheon could somehow manage to make him want to leave…
…
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
Does anyone have any recommendations for private investigators?
— … are you trying to stalk Grapes now?
┖ IM NOT
The private investigator he hired was utterly garbage. He shouldn't have trusted Twitter for advice.
What did he mean by, I couldn't follow him into the building? It was his job???
The only thing he got in the end was candid shots of Kim Soleum going about his day-to-day life, which were worthless to him. What was he going to do with them? They didn't have anything useful as blackmail. Was he supposed to use them as toilet paper?
He should've used the money on more merch instead of hiring this useless idiot. What a waste!
He flung the packet of photos onto his table. They scattered across it, creating a mess.
Ah fuck. Why did he do that? Now he had a mess to clean too.
With a heavy sigh, he quickly picked them up one by one, collecting them into a messy crinkled pile in his hands.
One by one, they were slowly cleaned up, but Baek Saheon really had to wonder, why on earth did that idiot take so many photos?
Yeah sure, that bastard was attractive when he actually put on makeup. Baek Saheon could admit that. But was it really needed to take so many photos because of that?
Finally, Baek Saheon had collected all but one. The last photo had somehow slid across his table and landed in front of his framed limited-edition autographed photocard of Grapes doing aeygo with a blush on his face that he had paid a good fortune for.
He picked it up. But before he could retract his hand to add it to the pile and burn it, he realised that—
Kim Soleum looked a lot like Grapes. Like, a lot.
With a trembling hand, he slowly held the photo beside the photocard.
Black messy hair with the same strands that curled to the left by 15 degrees and to the right by 12.
Black eyes with their unique red glint in the pupils when the light hits them just right, with a 6.05cm distance between them and a positive canthal tilt of 6 degrees.
Fingers measuring 6.9cm, 7.7cm, 8.5cm, 7.8cm, and 7.2cm from the thumb to the pinky, with a vein curling across the middle finger knuckle and down to the ring finger knuckle.
His mind was rapidly doing mental calculations as he quickly realised a lot of things he hadn't noticed before.
Grapes was 181cm tall. He had extrapolated that from full-body shots using objects in the background and cross-checked it with other fans to determine that answer. And Kim Soleum… was also 181cm.
He hastily did more comparisons between them.
Waist and hip circumferences, shoulder and chest width, and shoe size. They all matched perfectly. Apart from the way they styled their bangs and Grapes' glasses, they were practically mirror images of each other.
…
There was no way, right? He thought faintly, legs suddenly losing strength and he had to clutch onto the table with one hand to not fall, the other safely and gently deposited the photos onto the table, now knowing the value they held.
Holy fucking shit.
Grapes is MY wife @Viper_fangs
OH MY GOD