Chapter Text
-[ Around Noon ]-
“He’s dead.”
He’s dead.
He’s dead.
He’s fucking dead.
He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead.
He’s…
Dead…
How.
How?
How???
HOW????
HOW DARE THEY KILL HIM?
HOW DARE THEY KILL HIM??
HOW DARE THEY KILL HIM???
KILL. KILL. KILL. KILL. KILL.
Xiao could feel his face contorting into an ugly scowl, his eyes glaring daggers into the bearers of bad, fake, blasphemous, utterly disrespectful news to him.
How dare they?
He can’t be dead.
He can’t be…
“How could this be?” Xiao whispered harshly, each word losing its venom as his mind succumbed to the throes of grief and all its sorrow, trailing off at the end. Xiao felt the stone-cold barriers surrounding his heart crack. Anymore, and it would simply shatter, leaving him in shambles, picking up the thousands of shards on the ground as the world blurred.
Perhaps it was fate that I must be the last one left, that I will be the only one still alive after all this time.
Immortality… a curse in disguise as a blessing.
~ ~ ~
The featherlight breeze tickled Xiao's face, playing with the loose strands of his dark hair as he looked into the white-streaked sky, clouds painting the brilliant blue canvas in milky puffs, ambling along to an unknown destination; the bright egg-yolk sun casting its gold luminance over every crack and crevice in the stone and earth, tinting all that was below in its honeyed radience.
As if “he” were casting “his” divine, golden gaze onto the land below the heavens.
As if “he” were still alive.
Xiao shook his head, clearing it of those troublesome thoughts as he sat stiffly on the rooftop of the building, amidst the towering branches and leaves of the great tree, his spear so tightly gripped in his hand that the knuckles were white and his elongating nails, now closer to claws, were digging into the spear’s handle.
Dead.
Dead.
Dead.
As if to break Xiao's heart further, or just as a cruel deed enticed by the goading, bloodthirsty voices, his mind flashed him an evanescing image of a tall, faceless man wearing a white sleeveless robe, with the hood covering his handsome face and his long, dark brown to bright amber hair tied back into a long, unbraided Manchu queue with the front cut into an asymmetrical layered pixie cut instead of being shaved off.
The man’s hands were orange, bleeding into a similar dark brown like his hair, with elaborate pale yellow markings traveling up both arms that made Xiao's fingers twitch, wishing to trace the tattoos that adorned the man’s arms.
Another image flashed by, this time of those two. The two who had told him of “his” death. (But was it true?)
They were finally gone.
Gone…
Just like “him…”
Why?
Why?
Why did this have to happen?
Why???
The wind gave no answers.
And neither did the earth.
No one replied.
So Xiao dissipated his spear into golden, sun-like sparks that glimmered and shone in the light (so much like “his” powers) before dissolving into nothingness.
He pulled his legs towards his chest, letting his dark bangs fall over his closing, burning eyes, hugging himself tightly with well-toned, battle-scarred arms, and finally, letting the tears fall.
Pathetic.
Weak.
Useless.
Worthless.
They chanted in Xiao's mind, screaming how he had utterly failed his duty, how he had failed “him,” their anger reverberating and echoing, filling up his mind with white-hot rage as he shook and trembled quietly on the rooftop, his eyes squeezed shut.
The pain was sharp and almost unbearable as each word stabbed and tore through Xiao's mind and heart, ripping it into slivers of mere flesh and consciousness.
Xiao's teeth were grinding together so hard that he knew his jaw would ache later, and as Xiao lost his precious control, his teeth sharpened into fangs that dug into the tender flesh of the inside of his mouth, and he could taste the salt from the rivulets streaming from his eyes on his tongue.
Ba-dump. Ba-dump. Ba-dump.
Xiao's heart beat just as loudly as the voices, pounding in his chest as if it would rip itself out, lying in a puddle of red and red, and if agreeing, he could feel his throat grow a heart-shaped lump in it, thick and hard to swallow.
High above, the sun warmed Xiao’s body with rays of light as if it were “his” hands comforting him.
That thought speared through Xiao’s shattering heart, and he lifted his head, his eyes closed against the warmth of the golden celestial jewel amidst the sea of stars, soaking it all up like a drowned man gasping and gulping for fresh, fresh air, shakily breathing as if the air itself was a valuable, priceless treasure.
For now, Xiao would pretend.
Pretend that it was “him.”
* * *
“The view… I have never truly appreciated it before.” Rumbled the tall man standing beside Xiao, his stoic face contrasting heavily with the shimmering light in his amber-gold eyes, filled with an innocent child-like wonder that seemed impossible for a war-scarred god like him to possess.
An innocence that had long been robbed from Xiao.
How was it that someone like him had it, yet Xiao couldn't have it?
How? Why?
How??? Why???
As if sensing his troubles, the earth murmured beneath his feet, sending soft vibrations through Xiao's body, full of warmth, comfort, and safety.
Ah, how he wished to simply melt into that sensation. To just feel. To be content. To be with “him…”
“Him…”
Yes, that was what he wished for.
Xiao felt a weight pressing onto his shoulder, and when his head jerked to the side, he saw that the tall man was leaning on Xiao, a faint, ghostly smile adorning his usually sharp face.
How beautiful… Thought Xiao as he merely hummed contentedly, leaning back onto the solid figure, bodies shifting closer together.
Safe… safe… safe…
His eyes fluttered shut against the fading light, the sky brightening into vibrant reds, oranges, and pinks, and then into lengthening shadows, darkness expanding and enlarging as the sun fell from its high chariot position, hovering for a few breathtaking moments of awed silence before sinking below the peaks of darkening stone.
Yet “he” was still by his side, each breath stable and welcoming, as stars winked into life, small, insignificant pinpricks of light bathing the gloomy, early night in color.
“He” was always by Xiao's side.
Until “he” wasn’t.