Chapter Text
𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐢 𝐝𝐨 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮? (𝐨𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮’𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞)
My lover, no. friend, is dying.
I know it, he knows it.
Today he is especially weak,
nevertheless, he wanted to go out on a walk.
It was a cold November evening,
We both sat down on an old, slightly damp park bench.
I said, “look Chuuya, it's snowing in November, how odd is that...?”
He replied with, “what are you talking about Dazai? It's always snowing...”
Ah of course, I had forgotten.
Hallucinations were just another symptom to his illness.
Quietly, i said, “your right... It is always snowing.”
That conversation felt too much like a goodbye.
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I was putting flowers on his grave when I suddenly remembered that conversation.
I never told him how i really felt, but i hope he knows it.
Someday ill see him again, hopefully completing my goal of suicide.
Goodbye Chuuya Nakahara. I miss you more than anything.