Work Text:
isagi let out a exhale that sounded more like a sigh of exhaustion. which he was, practicing for multiple hours was harder than it sounded. he patted his icy and damp face with one of the soft towels that blue lock provided. making his way out of the bathroom — the halls were quiet for the most part, as if the entire building was sound proof. because isagi knew no one here would be asleep at 10pm. far too early for the chaotic bunch.
making his way towards his shared room — he already hears muffled voices , it almost felt like a routine. he’d walk in on his peers doing something completely unthinkable and random, he’d sit in bed watching the eventful scene unfold and then rin would walk in — towel around his neck due to just showering, with a look of confusion, concern and irritation to whatever was going on.
but this time was different, isagi opened the door, everything was normal at first — a positive, lively energy from his teammates . the only slight difference was rin already in his bed. facing away from everyone — as if the wall was such an eye-catching sight. isagi raised his eyebrow. usually he’d just leave him. but because it was rin , and so unusual for rin to change his routine, he couldn’t help but attempt some form of verbal communication.
without trying to draw attention from everyone else in the room. isagi sat on his bed which was ironically a few feet away from rins - simply staring at the back of rin, his viridian hair and slender but tough figure. isagi was probably just jealous that rin had such a good physique - because it meant better skill at football obviously. he almost forgot that he was there to bother rin.
“gosh, you must be tired” isagi initiated, his tone flat but laced with tease. rin immediately wanted to bash his head into a wall “mhm.” he responded. in a slightly passive aggressive manner. isagi tilted his head in confusion
“you work out to much? im not shocked you’re exhausted. your routine is too hard man…” he sighed. remembering the time he attempted to copy rins workout , not really succeeding….
“yup.” rin responded. isagi felt like something was missing. like rin had just paused mid sentence. “you really that tired just from your normal routine?” isagi poked. “yeah? im not some sort of super-human y’know.” rin responded sarcastically. isagi always took his harsh comments lightly. slightly smiling, he spoke back “oh come onnnn. i’m not stupid!” isagi went on.
rin simply sighed. choosing to ignore the boy, who was slowly getting more and more on his nerves. there was silence for a good 10 seconds. before rin felt a small weight at the end of his bed. immediately being able to sense isagis gaze. he spoke “you have your own bed y’know” rin mumbled. “my beds off limits until you tell me whats wrong” isagi replied teasing, despite having pure intentions.
“like i should tell you anything.” rin scoffed softly. “you should tell me stuff! who knows, maybe letting stuff off your chest will help you become the best striker in the world” isagi continued, his voice progressively growing a tone of sarcasm. which resulted in rin shooting him an evil glare. isagi exhaled softly with a giggle keeping his eyes on rin for a moment as his face fell into a gaze of more gentleness and worry. “y’know its not hard to tell when you’re worried?” isagi asked — though it sounded more like a statement. there was a moment of silence before rin turned over. still not looking at isagi - but in his direction , where isagi could see rins face. rin always had a look of gloom on his face. his teal blue irises constantly empty but so full of…. something. something isagi noticed, but he could never fully put the pieces together. “… why do you care?” rin asked. not even in a harsh, avoidant way. “..because i know you” isagi responded. oddly casually. rin had never felt his heart beating like this besides his unforgettable reunion with sae — ugh…. he hated thinking about that. but this feeling wasn’t bad. he didn’t feel as abandoned , useless and humbled as he did during that match. he couldn’t identify the feeling exactly. but it made his eyes tingle. fuck. he had rarely cried. sure when he was a kid, and the few other acceptable moments… but definitely not now — if he let one ounce of vulnerability show , he’d be humiliated for life . no exaggeration. rin visibly looked more tense. and his gaze looked strongly fixated upon his hands. “you dont.” he managed to mumble out. speaking quietly so any hint emotion that he was feeling as of now, would not show. rin couldn’t lash out on isagi, because recently he found that hard to do. he couldn’t do anything but lay their, his arms laid close to his face, almost in a defensive, protective manner. attempting to cover his face. he hated the idea of vulnerability. someone having complete control over how you feel. any slip up and it changes everything. or maybe that was just rins view on it. maybe it was rin that was the problem. he didn’t even realise isagi saying his name. until he felt a tingle in his eyes.. trying to blink it away , bringing his forearm to his eyes. he was pathetic. why couldn’t he control himself?? why was isagi such a pesterer, if he had just left him alone - rin wouldn’t look like an idiot right now. rin couldn’t see anything, as his arm was covering his eyes in attempt to stop or hide his tears. rin felt empty. cold, embarrassed, broken. so many things at once. that was until he felt shuffling on his bed. assuming isagi had left — before he felt a presence near , and two arms wrapped around his shoulders from behind. a warm, gentle pressure of touch on his back. rins legs went numb in shock. normally he would’ve immediately forced isagi off him and yelled. but he couldn’t. rin felt weak. he immediately broke down, all that was audible as of now was occasional sniffles from rin and the whispers that isagi spoke to the vulnerable one. rin turned around, wrapping his arms around isagi, so tight incase he tried to leave. burying his face in his chest in a mix of humiliation and affection. maybe if he didn’t move from isagis chest he’d suffocate and not have to wake up tomorrow completely embarrassed and exposed. but at the same time he couldn’t bring himself to even lie about not wanting to be in isagis arms right now. “its okay… i’ve got you…” a gentle voice reassured. rin hugged him tighter. he had never felt so connected to another. he wanted to stay here until they both died. so their bodies could rot as one. disgusting way to say he didn’t want to leave isagi any time soon… isagi was far too kind. rin had been dismissive to him, and here he was — holding the pathetic boy in his arms, whispering to him… rin wanted to apologise, and he also wanted to push him away. rin didn’t deserve this. what had rin does that was so great, that he was blessed with someone like isagi? although, selfishly, he refused to let him go. did he love him? maybe. maybe he was being dramatic — or maybe love was just too much of a simple word. because he wasnt in love. he loved isagi. rin knew the difference, as he felt it so deep. he would eventually tell the boy how he felt. just not now. rin couldn’t say anything — never mind his need to constantly be around isagi and treasure him forever. rin had never felt more warm in his life… isagis skin was soft. rin almost felt like he could feel the blood rushing through isagis skin. he wanted to feel more — in a literal way. not sexually. he didn’t care for that. he didn’t knew if isagi felt the same, but he didn’t care. all he cared about right now was the lullaby of isagis heart beat and the calmness of his touch. “i dont deserve you.” rin accidentally mumbled. but it was to late to take back now. isagi paused the hand that was stroking rins hair. he moved back slightly to look at him, which made rin hold him a little tighter just in case .. “what are you talking about…?” he asked, his voice a mix of confusion and guilt. rin almost looked like he was in a trance . he looked numb, but also as if something had him hypnotised. “i dunno…..” rin nuzzled his head back into the crook of isagis neck “ignore me… just stay here..” he mumbled, sounding exhausted . isagi softly smiled, he adored how rin was suddenly so clingy and needy… “go to sleep, silly…” he whispered softly. playing with his hair carefully. rin immediately listened - not wanting to risk isagi leaving his bed. there was comfortable silence for a moment.. rin could feel himself slipping into a deep sleep.. “i love you, isagi..” he whispered. “dont leave.”