Chapter Text
Step 1: awareness
Moonbin cannot stop staring at Eunwoo’s lips. They’re quite nice lips, mind you, and they look ridiculously soft – but obviously Moonbin didn’t tell you this, nor can he confirm its fluffiness because that requires venturing into some blurry territory of friendship and romance that Moonbin refuses to acknowledge he has fallen into. He just has a deep admiration and appreciation for Eunwoo’s lips. Scratch that. A deep as the sea admiration and appreciation for Cha Eunwoo.
In fact, Astro’s resident puppycat can’t not pay attention to Astro’s visual and his best friend.
He doesn’t know since when this became an obsessive habit of his. Sanha claims it’s been since he met Eunwoo. MJ helpfully says ‘since forever’. Rocky calls him smitten. And Jinjin just snorts when he asks him why. He hates to state the obvious but he has such helpful bandmates. Helpful bandmates that smirk with knowing glances every time he gets paired with Eunwoo for an activity. Bandmates that whisper amongst themselves and always ever so conveniently leave him alone with Eunwoo whenever they have free time.
With a sound akin to a puppy whimper, Moonbin smushes his face into his pillow, hating the fact that a free day has digressed into a day of restless confusion and continual pouting towards a certain Cha Eunwoo. Of course Eunwoo took this in casual stride and spared Moonbin any questions, only to every so often pat the dancer on the head with a silent “are you okay?” look that made Moonbin feel weirdly warm inside.
“Moonbin, can you help me make dinner?” Eunwoo’s head pokes in through the crevice of the open doorway, cute and twinkling eyes looking hopefully up at Moonbin who was currently wrestling with his blanket in the top bunk. Wait what. Cute?
Getting caught in this silly war with his trusty pillow and blanket and feeling embarrassed for calling Eunwoo’s eyes cute (what is he going to think next – that Eunwoo’s toes are adorable?), Moonbin stills and hesitantly pops his head up from the twists and tangles – much like how he feels about his love life.
“Yeah sure, give me a minute.” He blushes a bit when Eunwoo, instead of leaving him alone, pushes the door open further and makes his way over to him with a helping hand ready to intervene.
“You look adorable Bin-ah but I think you may need my help getting yourself out of that.” Eunwoo chuckles, leaning over the top bunk to pull the blanket off of Moonbin.
Flustered by the sudden closeness of his hyung and the side compliment, Moonbin quickly tries to disentangle himself on his own, avoiding any direct physical contact with Eunwoo’s hands, and successfully manages to do so. But as he climbs his way down the ladder, two steps at a time, he loses his footing at the last step and feels himself falling backwards. Thankfully for his dancer instincts, he twists to avoid falling on his back but instead finds himself pushing against a warmer body which he holds onto unconsciously as gravity pulls him and the other towards the floor.
A loud oomph and a groan later, Moonbin ends up lying chest to chest on Eunwoo with his hands gripping Eunwoo’s shoulders and something warm holding him at his waist.
Freaking Cha Eunwoo’s pretty fingers loop surreptitiously around the belt loops at his waist and Moonbin wants to dig a hole to bury himself in embarrassment. He tries to get up but the fingers now tighten around his hipbone (when did his shirt even lift up??) and his legs, entangled with Eunwoo’s, seemingly forbid him from detaching himself from the gorgeous boy lying underneath him. Instead he falls back onto Eunwoo with a groan, accidentally faceplanting the skin between Eunwoo’s neck and collarbone. While Moonbin’s dying in mortification with his face hidden in the crook of Eunwoo’s neck, he’s also painfully oblivious to the fact that Eunwoo’s blushing furiously at the boy in his arms.
They probably would have stayed frozen in that position had Eunwoo not taken ahold of himself and mumbled a soft ouch that tickled Moonbin’s sensitive ear. Moonbin hastily rolls over to his side, afraid of having hurt his hyung in his fall, and kneels beside Eunwoo with immense worry and dread showing on his face.
“Hyung! Where does it hurt? I’m so sorry I fell on you,” Moonbin rambles, tentatively placing his fingers randomly over Eunwoo’s face, cupping his cheeks, checking his head, etc. If any of the other members walked in on them now, they probably would have laughed at how crazily worried Moonbin was acting since he was usually the chill member of the group. But rather than responding to Moonbin’s questions, Eunwoo smiles fondly at him with his eyes curving into crescent shapes, stunning Moonbin’s rambling into cute stutters as he grows fidgety under the older’s warm gaze. Instead, Eunwoo opens his arms wide as if asking Moonbin to hug him (actually, he was just asking the younger to pull him up by the arms) – but Moonbin awkwardly leans over and wraps his arms around Eunwoo’s midriff, to which the visual confusingly looks down at the fluff of brown hair blocking his vision. Weird. If Eunwoo’s asking for a hug, why isn’t he hugging him back?
“Um Moonbin, I kind of needed you to pull me up by my arms,” Eunwoo quietly says after his arms had finally reciprocated the hug. Moonbin barely registers the other’s words, having gotten too comfortable in Eunwoo’s embrace, and wow was that the same soap he uses? Why does it smell so good on Eunwoo?
But alas all good things with his favorite person come to an end in the presence of a certain group of four people.
“You know, when you two ended up winning the two-person bedroom, we didn’t expect you guys to get this intimate,” MJ remarks.
Moonbin, whose eyes were closed as a result of Eunwoo’s soothing presence, blinks open at the sound of a giggle right above him. He twists his head and sees Rocky smiling at him, with Sanha by his side, who can barely keep quiet with his giggling.
“Okay lovebirds, making out time is over. We require your assistance in the kitchen.” Jinjin drawls from the doorway, eyes glinting mischievously when he sees both Eunwoo and Moonbin’s face flush red as they try to simultaneously detach and put distance between themselves.
“We weren’t making out!” Moonbin protests, shooting Rocky a glare when the 99liner laughs. MJ only raises a delicate brow in response.
“We’ll be right over there, guys.” Eunwoo consolingly says, shooing everyone out of the room with his hands. He chuckles when Sanha sticks out a tongue in defiance but being the obedient maknae he is, he leaves the room dragging along MJ and Rocky. Jinjin shakes his head in amusement and makes his way to leave too but not before quipping, “Better not be cuddling like lovesick fools next time I catch you two.”
If Moonbin’s face could get any redder, then it would be as red as Eunwoo’s lips after a day of photoshoots and lip biting.
Eunwoo finds it cute. Moonbin begs to differ.
“Hyung, do you need help getting up?” Moonbin his head to one side, wondering why the older was still sitting on the floor. He, himself, was already on his feet, bouncing on the balls of his heels as the earlier restless feeling returns to his body.
“Yeah, if you don’t mind.” Eunwoo says, instinctively lending out his arm. Moonbin smiles mischievously at him before swooping down and hugging Eunwoo by the waist and sneakily pulling him up.
With a cute laugh and perhaps fingers that linger a bit longer than necessary at Eunwoo’s waist before grabbing Eunwoo’s hand playfully, Moonbin grins shyly at Eunwoo and says, “I bet I could get to the kitchen before you!” before taking off and leaving the older boy in the room.
And if either of the two felt a tingle when their fingers brushed, neither mentioned it because they both believed it was their imagination and not something to dwell upon. After all, they were just best friends.
Right?
Step 2: hand touching
The concept of hand holding has never been a surprise to Moonbin. Whether it was for fanservice or just a genuine offer of stability in times of stress and emotional turmoil, Moonbin would never turn down the physical and mental comfort other’s hands hold.
But lately Moonbin notices something about Eunwoo that seems to directly correlate to him and hand touching. Whenever they’re on camera or off camera, the older finds a way to keep a comforting hand near Moonbin, varying from a casual arm placed around his shoulders to the delicate grasp of Moonbin’s wrist in Eunwoo’s soft and pliant palm.
Moonbin understood it at first when the camera lens focused on him and Eunwoo, and the older boy trailed his fingers up Moonbin’s spine playfully before settling perfectly on a shoulder as if it belonged there from the start. Of course the first time Eunwoo did this, Moonbin almost choked on his words while speaking to their AROHAs but he faked it to be a cough and side-eyed the surprising audacity his hyung seemed to have. Now, it’s as if he expects Eunwoo’s palm to be there, open and ready to receive Moonbin in case he stutters over his practiced script or needs a reassuring push to face the millions of unknown, judging faces behind the camera.
Slowly these shoulder hugs become light arm and wrist grabs, and occasional leaning into his personal space. Which Moonbin finds less disturbing than the honest fact that he doesn’t mind the growing, physical closeness with his favorite hyung. More times than not, he returns these favors and smiles shyly, even in response to the constant teasing he gets from the hyungs.
So in a light-hearted retaliation against the others, it unconsciously becomes a race between the two of them to see who can pull off the most casual side hugs and fanservice touches in the longest period of time without looking awkward. Ignoring the maknae line’s pretend gagging, it almost becomes a full on broadcast of just cuddling between Moonbin and Eunwoo at one point, and Jinjin had to intervene and force the two to stand on opposite sides of their team line for some time. While Moonbin still had the physical comfort and shoulder to lean on from whomever stood next to him that day, he couldn’t shake off the feeling that it wasn’t the same. That it didn’t give the same effect Eunwoo gave him.
So Eunwoo and Moonbin had to tone it down for Jinjin to allow them back together as the center duo again. And the two called a silent truce in the likes of love and war. How silly Moonbin thought that it would just be over like that.
Unfortunately for Moonbin’s health, Eunwoo had increased his physical affections off-camera and took many opportunities to sneakily jumpstart Moonbin’s calm heart into uncharacteristic throbbing, which Moonbin deems probably highly unhealthy.
For example, Moonbin was on dish duty with Sanha, having lost four rounds of rock-paper-scissors. Rocky had been extremely gleeful upon finding out he didn’t have to wash the dishes, finally able to skip out on the traditional maknae line dish duty and spend his free time doing something else other than seep his hands into dirty water.
Moonbin however had to accept his fate, and followed the overly hyper maknae into the kitchen, balancing six dishes precariously on his hands. The chore passed by quickly, with Sanha acting like the playful beagle he was and drawing out laughter from Moonbin every once in a while.
Moonbin was about done with the last dish when he felt a puff of warm air against his ear and familiar, firm arms wrap around his waist. He squeaked, to the amusement of both Sanha and the invader and Moonbin hears sweet-sounding laughter.
“Yah, you startled me Eunwoo-hyung!” Moonbin pretends to be mad as he scrubs the plate slightly harder, but he was actually just blushing and trying to hide his embarrassing squeak. Sanha sees the scene before him and chortles over the absurdity of the situation. When Eunwoo refuses to let go of his koala-bear hug and even dares to place his forehead against the back of Moonbin’s neck, the poor boy almost flings his plate at Sanha's face.
And yeah, Sanha’s seriously cracking up.
“Hyung, Moonbin’s face looks like a ripe tomato. You should totally see it!” Sanha teases, dodging his way out of the range of Moonbin’s arm and just barely avoiding the water thrown his way.
“Sanha, do you want to die? – No, hyung, don’t look!” Moonbin brings his wet hands up to his face with a shriek, trying to escape Eunwoo’s gaze. He swears he’s going to punch Sanha later in the privacy of a room. But right now he has his dignity at stake.
Eunwoo spins him around and Moonbin stumbles into Eunwoo’s awaiting embrace, face still covered.
“Bin-ah, you’re getting your face all wet. Sanha-ah, can you fetch me a dry towel?”
Moonbin hears Sanha leave the room and he’s ready to remove his hands and face Eunwoo only to feel sudden pain in his eyes. Eunwoo sees him flinch the same time Moonbin realizes what’s going on.
“Moonbin! Did you get soap in your eyes?!”
Eunwoo’s troubled eyes even look beautiful, Moonbin thinks as his eyes water a bit and he blinks rapidly at the other. “Maybe?” He chuckles, slowly becoming nervous when he sees Eunwoo’s expression curl into a frown.
“Oh baby, what am I going to do with you?” With a sigh, Eunwoo turns Moonbin around and proceeds to turn on the water. For a minute, Moonbin scarcely remembers what happens as Eunwoo practically washes the soap from his eyes out for him. He knows his face is flushed from the nickname Eunwoo had nonchalantly called him, but he keeps having to tell himself it doesn’t mean anything special.
“Ah here, Eunwoo-hyung. I’m going to leave you two alone now.” Moonbin hears a voice from his left, and had he not been stunned from Eunwoo’s use of ‘baby’, he would’ve grabbed Sanha by the arm and given the maknae a nice, little pinch as a present.
After a few more minutes of running water to fully wash out the soap from Moonbin’s eyes, Eunwoo turns off the faucet and the kitchen becomes abnormally silent.
“Moonbin-ah.”
Eunwoo’s voice is as soft and gentle as his ministrations towards Moonbin as the older boy lightly dabs at the water on Moonbin’s face. If Moonbin had opened his eyes, he would have seen a pretty, natural pink dust the visual’s cheekbones. But like anything in regards to Eunwoo, Moonbin felt like jelly in his legs and heart, and embarrassed that he was possibly reading too much into Eunwoo’s kind care.
He wouldn’t know how his reflexive little tongue peek, to wet his lips, would have such an impact on the visual. Neither would he know that maybe Eunwoo cared a bit more for him than for the others.
Instead when Moonbin opens his eyes, he decides to immediately look abashedly down at his slippered feet and to idly play around with his now soap-free fingers.
“So what were you and Sanha talking about?”
There’s a weird tone to Eunwoo’s voice and Moonbin forgets about his earlier embarrassment to look up at Eunwoo quizzically.
“Huh? Me and Sanha? Oh you know, what we usually joke about. Like funny things the hyungs did today.” Moonbin grins, recalling one of Sanha’s incredibly realistic imitations of MJ-hyung.
Eunwoo, to Moonbin’s surprise, frowns. “Was it that funny?” His confused face was so cute that Moonbin couldn’t help but laugh. “I would tell you hyung but Sanha’s better at it.” Eunwoo grumbles about something but to no avail, Moonbin couldn’t catch his words.
Oh.
“Don’t worry, hyung! You’re unintentionally funny. Like that time when you – “
Moonbin couldn’t finish his sentence as Eunwoo hurriedly covers his mouth with the palm of his hand, “Yah, that was so embarrassing. Don’t bring up old war memories Moonbin.” He tries to hiss threateningly but a blush starts to spread like a brushfire across his cheeks.
Moonbin’s eyes crinkle as he laughs at Eunwoo’s adorable response. “Fine fine, I won’t mention it but since you already remember it, I guess I got my point across.” Eunwoo pouts and Moonbin has a strange urge to capture the teasing bottom lip in between his own lips.
Woah there Moonbin, just what are you thinking??
Moonbin blanks out and everything that happens next feels like a haze.
Eunwoo had grabbed Moonbin’s hand and carefully interlaced their fingers together, whispering something.
“Sorry, I guess my point was that I got jealous seeing you and Sanha laughing together like that.”
But Moonbin probably imagined Eunwoo saying that. Just as he imagines Eunwoo hugging him close and confessing that maybe he cares a little more about Moonbin than he does for everyone else.
Step 3: cuddling
The first snow had fallen for the boys since debut. Along with the sudden chill of the dorm came rosy cheeks and heat packs. Eunwoo, for one, liked to go around joking that he’ll give a heat pack in exchange for a kiss and Moonbin had to ignore the strange clenching of his chest every time Eunwoo laughed as Sanha pretended to kiss his hyung on the cheek, begging for a heat pack. Heat packs became a necessity even in the dorm ever since the manager declared that their heater, which broke, would be fixed in a week.
And this is why Moonbin finds himself cocooned in a blanket on the living room floor next to MJ, as they monitor their latest performance. The floor was cold and rather a poor choice compared to the couch, but Rocky had unceremoniously pushed Moonbin off earlier, claiming his joints hurt and he needed the whole space to lie down.
Moonbin watches as the snow flutters down, a gray sky filled with bits of white, and is hit by an idea.
“Hyung, can we watch a movie tonight?”
MJ contemplates the thought for a second, “Seeing as we don’t have any schedules after 8pm, I don’t see why not.” The two boys share a grin between themselves before refocusing their attention back to the video.
“Be ready in ten minutes, we have an interview!” Jinjin’s voice resounds through the dorm. With a groan, Moonbin begrudgingly gets up, blanket draped across his shoulders. “I’ll let Jinjin know,” MJ says as he puts the tablet away and heads to the bathroom.
The interview flies by quickly and soon they are piling hastily into the car, puffing out breaths of hot air as they try to keep themselves warm standing out in the snow. As per usual, Moonbin sits in the back, between Eunwoo and Sanha. He’s preparing to take a short nap to save himself from falling asleep later during movie time, which Jinjin had officially declared when everyone was seated in the car, but feels something warm prod his cheek. He blinks an eye open wearily, seeing Eunwoo beaming a bit too brightly for the cold weather, pressing a hot pack against his cheek.
“Is this for me?” Moonbin asks, eyeing the warm object in confusion.
“It is if you give me a kiss,” Eunwoo nudges Moonbin’s shoulder with an impish upturn of his lips.
“Hyung! Appa and umma are flirting again!” Sanha shouts from his corner. Moonbin has half the mind to pinch the maknae’s cheek but he hears Jinjin respond back with a “That’s normal!” that effectively shuts him up.
“You won’t give it to me for free?” Moonbin pouts, slowly gearing up his aegyo to win Eunwoo over. He widens his eyes in the cute manner that Eunwoo claims can win over many fans, and smirks inwardly when he sees Eunwoo’s smile falter a bit. But the other's wavering stare promptly steels with a glint of mischief.
“Nope, nothing in this life comes for free Bin-ah,” Eunwoo sagaciously quotes, sitting back and holding the heat pack possessively to himself with a self-satisfying smug look that Moonbin really wants to wipe off his face.
Moonbin hardly considers the consequences when he surprises himself and everyone else in the car by leaning over and pecking the area dangerously close to the corner of Eunwoo’s mouth, his lips ghosting over the corner before he sits back in bashful glory.
“My payment?” He places the palm of his hand up, refusing to look at Eunwoo’s reaction. He catches Rocky’s eye, and sees him mouth something with a discreet finger pointing in Eunwoo’s direction.
Moonbin turns his head in bewilderment and oh.
Something sweet and supple is pressing against his lips.
The car is silent, save for the half squawk, half choke MJ lets out. And then it’s chaos as Eunwoo jolts back. Jinjin’s yelling something while MJ is still quietly screaming and squealing to himself. Rocky repeats ‘oh my god’ like a mantra and Sanha’s quietly stunned by the scene.
Eunwoo silently pushes the heat pack against Moonbin’s cheek, looking outside the window. But when Moonbin places a hand over Eunwoo’s to receive the heat pack, he feels a jolt. Maybe Eunwoo does too because the heat pack falls onto Moonbin’s lap and both boys dart slightly to opposite sides, looking everywhere but at each other.
Thankfully MJ gets the hint and stops his weird dying animal noises. He launches into a funny story that happened that day, trying to ease the awkward atmosphere brewing in the back of the car, and Sanha gives Moonbin a worried look.
From the corner of his eyes, Moonbin doesn’t miss the curious gaze the maknae sends Eunwoo.
The rest of the ride goes by like a blur and Moonbin feels colder with the heat pack than without it. Subsequently, Eunwoo’s careful to not make any physical contact with Moonbin in the car, and Moonbin’s heart sinks at the situation, leaning against Sanha’s side to seek some comfort. They arrive after an excruciating half hour, and the cold bites Moonbin in the face as he jumps out of the car. Moonbin listlessly shuffles into the dorm, allowing Sanha and Rocky to pull him in. Similarly behind him, MJ’s patting Eunwoo on the back and Jinjin has an arm flung out around Eunwoo’s middle.
Fast forward an hour later, the gang is lounging in front of the TV with Moonbin curled up in the corner of the couch, MJ sitting in the middle with his legs stretched out, and Eunwoo quietly seated on the other side. Sanha’s already stuffing popcorn into his mouth, sprawled on the floor next to Jinjin who keeps trying to steal some kernels from Sanha’s personal bowl.
“Since I won the game, I’m choosing a horror movie.” Rocky says from his perch on the couch next to Moonbin.
Everyone groans.
“Yah, you and Sanha better bring out all the pillows and blankets then.” MJ warns, grumbling about Rocky’s choice of movie. Moonbin’s shooting daggers out of his eyes at Rocky. He hates horror movies, and he knows he’s going to end up screaming or trying to hold back tears. So much for Rocky trying to make him feel better. Hearing none of Moonbin’s telepathic pleading, Rocky shows no remorse as he pops in the CD and kicks back at the foot of the couch, after fetching the pillows for everyone.
With a sigh that sounds more like a whine, Moonbin hugs his pillow to his chest, half obscuring his view of the television screen. He buries himself further into the couch as the movie starts.
The beginning sequence is not scary at all, with Moonbin’s pillow half-forgotten at his lap. A happy family moves into a new house in a small, rural town. Moonbin’s smiling a bit at the cute kids in the family as they run up and down the stairs of their new two-story house.
Of course the real horror kicks in after the first twenty minutes.
Moonbin’s image lies forgotten as he bites his pillow for the umpteenth time, blocking his vision from the second jump scare. They weren’t particularly horrible because Moonbin expected the two. But suddenly there’s a scream, one coming from the TV, and another mirroring it from MJ next to him. And with a shriek, MJ falls off the couch and onto the floor. Moonbin’s laughing at the flabbergasted face MJ’s sporting and is hardly aware that Eunwoo had moved over, replacing MJ’s vacant spot on the couch. It’s not until he turns his head to the screen and sees a horrible face that Moonbin also yelps and shakes in fright, face smushed into his pillow.
The ghost of a touch on his arm has Moonbin ready to smack whoever just startled him but instead when he turns his head, he sees Eunwoo giving him a concerned look.
“Are you scared Moonbin?” He softly asks, looking away from the screen and away from Moonbin, staring fixedly at the pillow suffering under Moonbin’s tight grasp.
Moonbin stutters.
“Am not!” He whispers back, harsher than he intends but refusing to show his weakness, and resolutely stares back at the screen.
Some ten minutes have passed and there’s a horrible scream accompanied by a gruesome picture on the screen and Moonbin throws all resolve out the window.
He drops the pillow onto the floor and clenches his trembling fingers onto Eunwoo’s shirt, burying his face in Eunwoo’s reassuring presence. Eunwoo says nothing, only pulling Moonbin onto his lap and bringing a blanket around the two of them so they stay warm.
Moonbin forgets about the movie and only pays attention to Eunwoo’s bodily warmth and the random shapes the older draws onto his back. The screams and shouts from the screen sound far away. And he could scarcely recall the events that led up to the last scene. Instead, with the steady beating of Eunwoo’s heart close to his ear, Moonbin drifts to sleep.
When Moonbin wakes up, it’s the next morning, and the first thing he sees is Eunwoo’s face lying a few inches from his own. He wants to bolt and pretend nothing from yesterday had happened but when Eunwoo opens his eyes and smiles at him, he bites his lips in embarrassment and shuffles closer to the other.
And if anyone notices that he ends up sleeping with Eunwoo for the rest of the week, his response is, “It’s cold without the heater and Eunwoo’s really warm.”
Step 4: pecks
Something changed in the relationship between Moonbin and Eunwoo. A vague area of what seemed acceptable that was constantly regarded whenever the two shared a glance.
A year ago, Moonbin would have without second thoughts pushed off anyone who dared to carelessly sit on his lap, not wanting to suffer the weight of another muscle pig. The Moonbin now bites back his words when Cha Eunwoo plops down on him as a second chair. His initial, natural instinct was to shove the visual off but with one look at Eunwoo’s puppy eyes, his itching fingers still and Moonbin concedes.
Moonbin refuses to call himself whipped, as the other members have also taken an interest to the new skinship-loving Eunwoo. They coo at the visual, maybe even rub it in Moonbin’s face when Eunwoo’s showing them his aegyo instead of Moonbin.
Of course, Moonbin doesn’t take their bait and admires Eunwoo from afar, reveling in pride at how Eunwoo was slowly growing to be more outgoing and open on shows and in the public. His fear though lies in wondering if he’s as close to Eunwoo as he had been in the past. What if things have changed? What if Eunwoo doesn’t need Moonbin anymore?
His deep thoughts can’t remain hidden forever and it’s only until Jinjin calls him out on it one day as he and the leader go on a convenience store run.
“Moonbin, you’ve been sulking the whole day. Is something bothering you?” Jinjin asks, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder as they walk out of the store.
The question catches Moonbin by surprise and he stops walking. He’s not sure how to exactly fully phrase his question, nor does he truly understand what he feels upset about. So he opens his mouth hesitantly and lets his words fall.
“Hyung…do you ever worry that someday you’ll matter less to the one person you care about the most?”
Jinjin purses his lips and guides Moonbin to the curb, pulling him down gently so they both sit down. The blonde-haired boy is silent for a minute or two before heaving a sigh.
“Sometimes relationships fall apart because they aren’t meant to stay together. You can try fighting for it, but if one side doesn’t care, it’ll only bring pain to the other side. But in your case, Moonbin-ah, I think the other person still cares just as much about you as you do for them.”
Jinjin chuckles, “Actually there’s usually only two situations where you could possibly feel this. Either it’s a strained friendship or couple relationship….or you’re just jealous and quite possibly in love with someone.” The leader grins as Moonbin’s face grows warm.
“Me? In love? That’s not possible,” Moonbin retorts, already getting up and grabbing their bags of snacks. “No way, I’m not in love with him.”
Jinjin snorts, “So you do have someone in mind.”
Moonbin offers no response and stalks off with the groceries.
“Yah, pesky kid and your long legs. I’m only slightly kidding Bin-ah! Yah, don't just carelessly swing the bags like that!” Jinjin shouts from behind him.
A week passes and Moonbin can’t shake off the weird feeling of being watched. Every time he turns his head, he can’t catch the culprit and he bemoans the fact that his own daily musings and thoughts about Eunwoo have slowed down his usually quick reflex.
They’re on break after a grueling five hours of dance. Sanha and MJ were in the middle of a prank involving the leader and Moonbin burst out laughing at Jinjin’s late reaction: an incredulous, kicked-puppy face.
There it is again. He snaps his head to his right, catching Eunwoo’s stare before the other hurriedly looks away. Moonbin furrows his eyebrows; well he supposes, he wasn’t the only one acting weird. But the dancer has no time to dwell upon the potential reasons behind Eunwoo’s stares because Jinjin has cut break short, drawing groans from the two pranksters.
It’s not until 2am after dance practice, when the sun has long set and the artificial beams from the overhead lights are the only source of brightness in the room, that Eunwoo confronts Moonbin, body strategically sliding between the door and Moonbin’s outstretched hand on the door knob. The others have already headed off, Jinjin dragging Sanha and MJ by the ears, complaining about being hungry but really just ready to dole out some form of punishment for the two. Rocky followed silently after, but not before throwing Eunwoo a look.
The empty practice room falls mute to the outside street sounds and with the way Eunwoo’s curiously studying him and giving the dancer his undivided attention, Moonbin is rendered momentarily speechless, all questions lodged in the back of his throat.
“Is there something going on that you’ll like to talk to me about?” Eunwoo whispers, interlacing his fingers with Moonbin’s and leading him slowly to a seat on the ground.
He doesn’t say anything and just looks at Eunwoo, taking in the prominent eyebags but still bright eyes, the sweat but still glowing complexion, the chapped lips dying to be quenched but now misplaced with a pretty little frown. He doesn’t realize he stares a tad bit longer than necessary at Eunwoo’s lips until the other jolts him out of his thoughts.
“You know that I’m always here, Bin.”
And with Eunwoo’s simple words, Moonbin finally understands. Understands that people grow and change, that they may drift in and out of relationships, but that he and Eunwoo are constant and it’ll take a lot to change that.
Yeah, I know.
“I think I get it now. It’s nothing, Eunwoo.” Moonbin lets a grin slowly grow on his face, feeling for the first time in weeks a hundred times lighter, “I was sad and worried about something silly but I think, I think I finally got it resolved.”
What he doesn’t expect is for Eunwoo to let out a deep sigh or for the older to fling his body onto Moonbin, encompassing the surprised boy in a tight hug and nuzzling the side of Moonbin’s head in relief and happiness. It’s ticklish and Moonbin can’t hold in the little giggle he ends up letting out.
“Thank goodness, you had me really worried that I did something wrong or that you were angry.” Eunwoo mumbles weakly, “I thought I lost you as my best friend.”
Moonbin forgets, in that second, that he was the only one hurting over these thoughts. That Eunwoo had also been dealing with it from his side, and Moonbin tries to swallow the bubble of guilt suddenly creeping up on him. He tightens his grip on Eunwoo’s sleeves.
“I’m always your best friend, Eunwoo.” Moonbin quietly says and in a moment of bravery, he turns his head and kisses Eunwoo quickly on the cheek.
Eunwoo pulls back immediately and puts a hand on the aforementioned spot, and stares back at Moonbin quizzically? Embarrassedly? And something else that Moonbin can’t recognize as a flurry of emotions assault his thoughts and oh no, did I just ruin everything?
But Eunwoo smiles shyly and surprises Moonbin by leaning in and pressing his lips against the same spot, but on Moonbin’s cheek, lingering slightly longer. Neither of the two mention anything when Eunwoo pulls back.
“Now we’re even.”
And Moonbin laughs.
By the time Jinjin calls them, screaming about a destroyed kitchen and “Oh my god, are you guys making out??”, Moonbin and Eunwoo had snuck a total of eight innocent pecks.
Step 5: acceptance
Under their unspoken rules of bro code, Moonbin and Eunwoo agreed that kisses are okay as long as they weren’t on the lips. Emphasize the bro, and Moonbin would tell you that it’s totally platonic with no strings attached other than those of broship.
At least that’s what he tells himself whenever Eunwoo sneaks a peck when they’re alone and leaves Moonbin’s heart pit-pattering against his chest.
Moonbin considers the pecks to be playful and to have no meaning so when Astro’s manager declares that Astro will be going on a camping trip and that he already designated who would be pairing with whom in the tents, Moonbin thinks part of his soul may have just left his body.
Eunwoo and…Moonbin! Okay boys, start packing your bags. We’ll be leaving tomorrow!
He gulps and catches Eunwoo’s attention, and tries to steadily return the bright smile thrown his way.
They wake up at seven in the morning with the manager blaring his handy-dandy air horn right near Moonbin’s ear. The poor boy nearly falls over his top bunk in shock but Eunwoo had reacted fast enough and barricaded Moonbin from following. His sleep-addled mind only remembers nodding his head to Eunwoo as thanks.
Moonbin sleep walks to the van and randomly sits next to the first person he sees in the van. Judging from the voice and stature, he finds himself unconsciously leaning into MJ’s side, the elder surprisingly awake and already chattering about how to catch fish to anyone who was awake enough to listen. Despite the noise, Moonbin snuggles deeper into the eldest’s side and falls back to sleep, just as Eunwoo boards the car last.
By the time they arrive to their campsite, Moonbin had slept an additional total of four hours more or less. He had woken up periodically, either from MJ’s grabby hands whose owner took liberty in playing around with Moonbin’s hair and cheeks in his sleep or from Sanha’s long, poking fingers. One time they had to stop and get lunch, a welcome distraction from his constant slumber, because he had skipped breakfast. He gobbled the food down and from there on, fell into a food coma. The last time he woke up in the car was when Eunwoo had woken him up and handed him a mirror, from which Moonbin saw a very detailed flower on his cheek. The whole car erupted in laughter when Moonbin yelped, Rocky laughing the hardest – proud of his latest artistic creation.
“Okay, now that we’re here and the sun is about to set in two hours, give or take, I suggest you guys pitch the tents and look for firewood. I’ll leave some food but you might want to go fishing tomorrow.” The manager says while casually placing the ramen and snacks on the group with the tent supplies.
“What do you mean we need to fish?” Jinjin asks in a deliberate manner, reflecting everyone’s confusion.
The manager ignores his words and continues rambling, “And here’s the first aid kid if something happens, which I hope doesn’t because you boys are smart. Now I’ll be leaving you guys here for four days on your own. Have a fun vacation boys!” The little flag he hands to the speechless Jinjin says the words Secret camera success! on it and Moonbin visible pales.
“Hyung, how can we survive on our own for four days?!” MJ shrieks. Sanha, sitting on a log next to the hyperventilating MJ, is frozen in shock.
“You can do it. Fighting!” Their manager or rather their ex-manager, in Moonbin’s eyes, gives them a thumbs up and begins to board the van. “Return to this spot at approximately ten in the morning on the fourth day. Today marks the first day!” and with an encouraging shout, he leaves in the van. The boys are still in shock and no one attempts to run after the car, demanding for answers.
“No way…” Rocky whispers. The boys have grown silent, with Jinjin probably having a mental breakdown as Moonbin worriedly looks over to the leader sitting on the ground despondently, probably contemplating his life choices.
Only Eunwoo is at ease, already moving the food items to one side and picking up the tent equipment. Everyone stares at him.
“What? Don’t tell me you guys didn’t expect this?” He says in an innocent fashion. No one has the heart to be angry at him when he nervously smiles.
Setting the tents and finding firewood wasn’t difficult. By the time night has fallen, the six boys have gathered around the fire with stomachs full from ramen. Because it was summer, there were bugs everywhere and Moonbin swears he probably has six bites already laying claim to his body.
“After seeing the stash of food and snacks manager-hyung left us, I predict it’ll only last us another two full meals. Breakfast and lunch tomorrow. He wasn’t kidding when he told us to fish…” Jinjin says with a sigh, pulling out two fishing rods.
“Wow, they really pulled out the full stops for this camping trip,” MJ whistles, taking one of the rods in his hands and turning it around to examine it.
“So should we split the tasks for tomorrow?” Rocky asks, slapping his ankle because of a mosquito.
“Ooh hyung, I want to go fishing!” Sanha exclaims. Since there are two poles, that means…
“Same, can I also go?” Moonbin volunteers. He might as well try fishing while he has the chance. He can’t possibly be that bad, right?
Jinjin nods his head in affirmation, “Then I suppose Rocky and I can go gather more firewood and scope the area. Is that okay with you two?” He looks at MJ and Eunwoo expectantly.
“As long as I can go fishing the day after,” MJ shrugs and then tilts his head up to see the sky. “Yeah, it’s no problem hyung,” Eunwoo says, “I’ll probably be in charge of cooking the fish anyways so I don’t mind resting while waiting for you guys.”
“Alright! We have a big day ahead of us so we should head to bed now.” Jinjin claps his hands together, in an attempt to liven the mood.
Moonbin gets up from his spot on the log, stretching as he yawns, and walks towards his and Eunwoo’s shared tent. Earlier when they were pitching the tents, Moonbin noticed that they were rather small for two people. Not wanting to imagine what could possibly happen in a cramped tent with Eunwoo, he flips open the flap and crawls in. It would get cold at night so there were two sleeping bags to serve as makeshift mattresses and a large fluffy blanket to share between the two campers. Moonbin flops onto the left side and carefully takes off his shoes to place them outside the tent. He hears a rustle as the flap opens again and Eunwoo clambers in.
“Shall we take a selca to celebrate being stranded?” Eunwoo proposes good-humoredly, already bringing out his phone without its signal and cellular data to check for good lighting.
“We should take some silly ones and then upload them later,” Moonbin laughs. He’s relieved that it isn’t awkward between the two of them and that Eunwoo’s acting as if the two didn’t have a competitive, kissing streak going on.
They take a few photos, one where they’re pouting and pretending to cry and another in mock surprise. After the third cute photo, Eunwoo pockets his phone and scratches at his arm.
“Weird, I didn’t have that bite before entering the tent.” The older says, eyes growing slightly bigger with a look of horror on his face.
“Moonbin, I think we have a mosquito in this tent.”
Moonbin groans. “Hyung, I don’t want to get up though.” He emphasizes his point by plopping down at the foot of Eunwoo’s legs, wriggling like a fish out of water.
Eunwoo scowls, which is quite the sight to see.
“Bin-ah, you know I hate bugs! And before you say I went to New Caledonia and should be fine with them now, I’ll have you know that I still don’t like them.” Eunwoo lowers his ranting to an ominous whisper, “Especially the bloodsucking ones.” And he shudders, much to Moonbin’s amusement.
Eunwoo’s clutching the blanket and Moonbin can’t stand how cute his hyung is acting, scared of a little mosquito, so he pretends to be reluctant in getting up. From the corner of his eyes, he sees Eunwoo’s eyes light up in gratitude and Moonbin briefly chokes on a dangerous, non-platonic thought. Fortunately Eunwoo isn't looking at him and Moonbin makes a quick mental recovery from his dark thoughts.
Moonbin silently eyes his surroundings, taking care to check the corners of the tent. The insides of the tent are pristine, thanks to Eunwoo, making it easy to find a suspiciously black spot. Moonbin’s eyes hover towards the light and he sees it, sitting cooly right above the portable light. Staring too much into the light causes Moonbin to see some dark spots so he blinks away and smirks a bit in Eunwoo’s direction.
“Found it princess.” He teasingly says, edging slowly up to the light to swat the mosquito, and missing the blush blooming on Eunwoo’s cheeks.
Moonbin smacks the top of the tent but when he brings his hand back to check, he sees nothing.
“Yah, where is –“
“IT’S ON YOUR ARM!”
Moonbin yelps and blindly slaps his arm. After four slaps, he finally sees the gross mosquito leftovers and winces, both at the mess and how red his arm has gotten. Eunwoo laughs and hands him a sanitary wipe.
“What a charming prince I have,” the older boy jokes, fondly patting Moonbin’s cheek.
“Now my arm stings,” Moonbin complains, flopping down onto his sleeping back in resignation, “Are we clear to sleep now, hyung, or do I need to exterminate more bugs for you?” He scrunches his nose in distaste.
Eunwoo leans over and leaves a gentle press of his lips on Moonbin’s nose. Boop. As Moonbin’s face flushes, Eunwoo by coincidence turns off the light.
“Nah, we’re fine. Go to sleep Bin-ah, thanks for everything.”
Morning comes and Moonbin wakes up to an empty tent. Knowing Eunwoo, the other had probably woken up an hour earlier, bustling around outside on camp grounds, doing something to prepare breakfast.
Sanha was already sitting on the logs, carving something out of a chunk of wood with the spare pocketknife Jinjin kept around.
“Is that a fish?” Moonbin asks as he settles down next to the maknae.
“Yay! At least someone understands my art,” Sanha sticks his tongue out in Eunwoo’s direction and the others puts his hands up in mock surrender.
“To be fair, what you showed me was just a block of wood so.., ” Eunwoo points out.
“Fine hyung,” Sanha says with a harrumph, tongue sticking out a bit as he returns to working hard on his ‘masterpiece’.
“Hyung, do you need help with breakfast?” Moonbin calls out, rubbing his eyes to get rid of any trace of sleepiness.
“It’s about done, but wake up the others please.”
Morning passes by with no commotion. They go on a small hike just before lunch and return in time to finish the last of their food supplies.
“Now we really don’t have food.” Jinjin says as he hands a bucket, bait, and two rods to Moonbin and Sanha.
“Come back before the sun sets because the forest will be dangerous after dark. Rocky and I will head out the other way for wood.” Jinjin cracks his knuckles.
“Now let’s get down to business.”
The river isn’t hard to find, the group having scouted it earlier during their hike. It flows into a clear lake and if Moonbin had no pressing responsibilities, he wouldn’t have minded spending the rest of the day just playing in the waters or sunbathing by the rocks. Alas, the burden of three meals lies on his and Sanha’s shoulders, and with a grunt Moonbin surveys the spot.
They find a well-calculated spot where there are several fishing eddies. The two place down their supplies and find flat rocks to sit on, throwing in their lines.
“Hyung, how are you and Eunwoo-hyung?” Sanha blurts out after half an hour of silence. They have caught two fish so far and the elongated silence was getting awkward for the usually hyper maknae and restless dancer.
“What are you even talking about?”
Sanha gives him a judging look – who taught the maknae that? “You two are acting weird. Either you’re really touchy with each other or ignoring each other. I don’t know what to think.”
Moonbin purses his lips and pretends to be focused on fishing. “Isn’t that how we usually are? I’m close to him but I can’t give all my time to him, Sanha-ah.”
“Oh but isn’t that where you’re wrong, hyung?”
Huh. Does he really think that?
“I don’t really know what’s going on either. I like him but I also don’t mind the way things are now.” Moonbin admits, looking away from Sanha’s surprisingly piercing gaze.
“Hyung, I think Eunwoo-hyung is like a fish and that you’re the bait.”
Moonbin laughs at the weird comparison, “Yah, what are you saying-“
“Shh hyung, don’t interrupt my genius metaphor. So he’s the fish you’re trying to catch. You know there’s more fish in the sea but is that what you truly want? What if he gets attracted by another bait?”
Moonbin stills, protest on the tip of his tongue, “But-“
“Sorry hyung, I’m going to interrupt you once more. Just think about it soon, okay? I don’t want either of you two to be upset in the long run.” And with that Sanha goes back to concentrating on snagging fish.
Moonbin stares agape at the other, “Wow, you’re lucky I like you Sanha-ah. Interrupting your hyung twice.” Sanha only grins cheekily back at him.
But what does Sanha mean? How do I even attract Eunwoo? He’s just being silly…
They return before sun sets with enough fish to spare. By the time Sanha and Moonbin have settled by the fire, listening to Jinjin’s random account with an animal, Moonbin had forgotten what the younger had said.
He only recalls the maknae’s words once everyone has gone to bed, with Eunwoo gently touching his shoulder reminding him that he needs to sleep soon. Now he gazes into the fire listlessly, with only MJ by his side, the other boy scribbling something into his journal.
“Hyung, would you believe that I think too much or too little?” Moonbin says out of the blue. The scratching of pencil against paper stops as MJ looks up at Moonbin curiously.
“Most of time, you think too much. Is this about Eunwoo?” MJ asks, returning back to his writing, not aware that he dropped a figurative bomb on the younger boy.
“Maybe,” Moonbin shyly says, scratching the back of his neck nervously, “Sanha said something earlier that made me think too much about my relationship with Eunwoo.”
MJ hums to himself as he turns a page. “Frankly, I’m not too worried about you two. You’ll work something out because you two are precious to each other that I doubt anything can really ruin your current relationship.”
“But you don’t know what I’m capable of doing?” Moonbin questions, the words falling out of his mouth before he could put a filter through them.
MJ chuckles, actually putting down his journal and pen to face Moonbin directly.
“And what exactly are you talking about?” There’s a devilish glint in his eyes that Moonbin catches briefly before all that Moonbin eventually sees are stars from the night sky reflected in the eldest’s eyes.
“I d-don’t know.” Moonbin mutters.
The other boy sighs before falling sideways onto the log, placing his head under his arms, “I think we should just observe the stars for a while. We probably won’t get another chance to do this, Bin-ah. Especially since things will change once we leave this place.”
Moonbin silently assents; once they get busier with their idol lives, such an excursion would be rare and a blessing. But little did he know MJ was alluding to something else.
So Moonbin leans back and looks up at the stars, admiring how easily they twinkle from so far away.
Even though Moonbin sleeps later than Eunwoo, he ends up waking up before the older, now lying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. It was probably a nightmare or something that prevented him from falling back asleep. He might as well get up and do something productive.
Careful to not step on Eunwoo, Moonbin leaves his tent and blinks to take in his surroundings. The sky is still dim, meaning the sun hasn’t yet risen. Moonbin smells a certain dampness in the air and briefly worries that it might start raining but forgets the thought when he catches sight of a familiar brunette.
“Rocky, what are you doing up so early?” Moonbin tilts his head to one side, confused by the presence of the other.
“That’s my question to you. Usually Eunwoo has to wake you up, which he complains about all the time but I know better.” Rocky grins slyly.
Moonbin pretends he doesn't hear the jab Rocky throws his way and crosses his arms, “Yah! I don’t sleep in that late." He suspiciously eyes the other boy, "Wait, are you going to see the sunrise?”
Rocky gives him a nod, “Want to come along?”
“Yeah sure, I haven’t seen one in a while actually…”
“Lazy.”
“PARK MIN HYUK, GET BACK HERE YOU PUNK!”
Rocky and Moonbin end up running all the way to the spot Rocky wanted to see the sunrise from. Having had no prior stretching, both boys are panting by the time they skid to a stop, muscles aching from the early morning exercise.
“Okay, you aren’t that lazy I guess,” Rocky quips, shouting when Moonbin jabs him in the side for revenge. The two find comfortable spots to sit down and then turn their gaze to the horizon.
“Actually I take that back, you wouldn’t be a lazyass if you’ve finally done something about that ambiguous relationship you and Eunwoo-hyung have.” Rocky matter-of-factly states.
“Why is it that every time I’m alone with someone other than Eunwoo, you guys end up bringing him up?” Moonbin grumbles. Rocky only shrugs, “Nothing else to talk about.” He laughs when Moonbin weakly punches him in the arm.
Because Rocky was the only other person whom Moonbin would consider his best friend if Eunwoo didn’t already claim that title, he considers spilling out everything. All the dark thoughts. The ones that keep him up at night and was probably the reason why he woke up early.
“Rocky…I think I may like him.” Moonbin whispers, shivering a bit as he wraps his arms tighter around his knees.
Rocky was probably smugly grinning at him or ready to say, “Told you so”, but instead Moonbin feels the other place a comforting arm on his shoulder, and he turns around in confusion.
The other boy sighs. “Now there’s only one thing left to do.”
“No.” Moonbin mumbles, more to his knees than to the other.
“Hey look Bin-ah, the sun is rising!” Rocky exclaims, nudging Moonbin excitedly, any hints of the previous conversation gone.
“Yeah, sure.” Moonbin looks at the sun gradually rising up, ready to blind him in the face.
“You know…there will always be a new day.” Rocky mysteriously says once the sun was well above the horizon, slowly getting up and lending Moonbin a hand. “So if you ever mess up, you have the next day.”
Moonbin says nothing.
Six hours pass and Moonbin grows increasingly restless. Of course Jinjin decides to put Moonbin and Eunwoo on firewood duty. So Moonbin stands outside his and Eunwoo’s shared tent, waiting for the older boy to get ready. The sky seems to darken a bit even though it’s only three in the afternoon, but as soon as Eunwoo emerges from their tent, Moonbin turns his back and starts heading into the forest.
Eunwoo follows soundlessly after him with his backpack.
They have walked quite a long distance, with Moonbin mindlessly strolling further and further into the forest, plagued by his thoughts. Eunwoo only wordlessly follows the other, having not been into this part of the forest because he stayed back on camp grounds the day before, so he decides to fully trust wherever Moonbin is taking him.
Moonbin stops abruptly, having found a clearing right beside a small cliff. “I think this is a good place to start.” He says, not facing Eunwoo as he begins to gather some firewood.
“Okay.”
The two proceed to gather wood for some ten minutes until Moonbin feels a drop of water hit his cheek.
“It’s raining Moonbin, hurry put the wood in this backpack so it doesn’t get wet!” Eunwoo’s already by his side.
“Let’s look for some shelter and wait out the rain.” He says once he closes his backpack, scouting the area for thick foliage.
“How about here?” Moonbin had unknowingly grabbed Eunwoo’s wrist and pulled the other boy towards a tree just peering over the small cliff. The two squeeze into the space under the tree, huddling against the trunk.
“Who would have thought this would have happened,” Eunwoo muses, eyes glancing over the cliff to see the rain fall.
“It’s going to be a pain to dry off though, hyung,” Moonbin says with a sigh, leaning against the trunk and closing his eyes.
Eunwoo chuckles, “Did you not get enough sleep, Bin-ah?”
Moonbin cracks open an eyelid, “I woke up early and went to see the sun rise with Rocky. Couldn’t sleep. Been thinking too much.” He says in short sentences to avoid possibly saying too much to his newfound crush.
“Were you thinking of me?” Eunwoo jokes but Moonbin’s already on his feet, standing a foot away from Eunwoo.
“W-what are you talking about?” Moonbin stutters and in his alarm, places a foot behind him.
“Yah, Moon Bin, don’t walk back!” Eunwoo warns, reaching a hand out to grab Moonbin.
But Moonbin doesn’t think, pulls his arm away from the other as if he were electrified as he takes a step back, and hears Eunwoo shout as he loses his footing and plummets down.
There was only pain.
When Moonbin finally stops rolling and ends his tumble conveniently at the bottom of the cliff, he lets out a groan. His body aches but nothing compares to the pain in his right ankle. I probably sprained it. Moonbin shakily sits up, and examines the swelling. Great, now how is he going to get back up?
He’s about to put his ankle through hell as he heaves his body weight to his other leg in an effort to stand up, but something or rather someone crashes into his side and envelops him into a tight embrace. In that second, Moonbin falls back onto the floor.
“How? What?” Moonbin says in broken syllables when he recognizes familiar black hair, now flat because of the rain but still tickling the side of his face.
“Moonbin! Moonbin, are you okay? Are you hurt? Thank goodness I brought the first aid kit. I thought I lost you there! The cliff wasn’t as high as I feared, but it still must have been an awful fall.” Eunwoo blubbers, his face wet.
“Hyung…are you crying?” Moonbin forgets his predicament and closely examines his hyung’s face in amazement. Cha Eunwoo doesn’t cry. “Why?”
Eunwoo lets out a shudder, trying to calm himself down. “Why wouldn’t I be? I thought you were –“ He doesn’t say anything else and allows Moonbin to bring him onto his lap as the two sit against the cliff, with Eunwoo’s head placed against Moonbin’s chest.
“Shh, nothing happened. Everything’s fine.” Moonbin murmurs as he wipes away the tears or rain on Eunwoo’s face.
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t lose me.”
They say it at the same time. Eunwoo accidentally blurts it out while Moonbin had meant to keep it in his thoughts but unintentionally whispers it. The older boy looks like a deer caught in headlights, having pulled his head back and is now looking at Moonbin with shocked eyes.
Moonbin closes his eyes momentarily and prays that he doesn’t screw things up.
“Cha Eunwoo, I like you. Like like you, maybe even love you” Moonbin swallows, looking down at his hands which are holding onto Eunwoo’s hips – his fingers clenched onto the damp cloth covering Eunwoo’s skin.
“Moonbin, I –” Eunwoo starts but Moonbin moves forward and hides his face in Eunwoo’s chest. “I don’t know if I want to hear it, hyung.” He whispers, trying to concentrate on the rain falling by his ear and not on the quick palpitations coming from Eunwoo’s chest.
Eunwoo laughs.
What the-
“If you would let me finish. Moon Bin. I want to be your best friend, the closest person you have in life. I want to wake up and see your smile first thing in the morning. I want to know your dreams and encourage you, and help you improve, move forward. I want to take care of you on your bad days and the days you hurt – don’t lie to me, I know you twisted your ankle, you cheeky brat – but most of all. I want to be only yours and I want you to be only mine. I love you Bin-ah.”
Eunwoo notices that Moonbin has pulled back and is no longer hiding against his chest.
“So what do you s- mm!”
Something wet and warm has captured his lips, biting Eunwoo’s bottom lip and drawing a gasp from the older boy. The visual’s brain short circuits when Moonbin somehow manages to find his way into Eunwoo’s mouth and starts to wrestle with his tongue, moaning at the sweet taste of his hyung. Eunwoo hears himself involuntarily whimper and feels Moonbin’s lips curve into a grin.
When they pull apart, they’re panting and their cheeks are undeniably red.
“Sorry hyung for interrupting but you looked really irresistibly cute.” Moonbin says, leaning over to peck Eunwoo on the cheek.
He watches as Eunwoo covers his face in adorable embarrassment, muttering “the nerve of this kid…”
“So is my boyfriend going to help me get back to camp?” Moonbin asks, mind straying to other thoughts when he sees Eunwoo hesitantly wet his bruised lips.
“Can you stand up at all?” Eunwoo slides off Moonbin’s lap and gives the other a hand. He frowns when he sees Moonbin wince, albeit how much the younger tries to hide it.
“Get on my back, Bin-ah,” he orders, moving his backpack in front of him as he crouches down.
“Is this a privilege of being your boyfriend?” Moonbin says as he climbs onto Eunwoo’s back without a protest. Eunwoo rolls his eyes, “Sure, and this is too.” He pinches the inside of Moonbin’s thigh and revels in the cute, little shriek Moonbin lets out.
Fortunately Eunwoo doesn’t need to scale the cliff, as he slowly makes his way up a stray path on the side. They’re back at the clearing and the rain has lessened to a drizzle.
“Hyung, how do we tell the others about us?” Moonbin wonders out loud, placing butterfly kisses on the older’s neck as Eunwoo trudges his way back on the same path they came from (bless his memory).
“Yah, stop distracting me. And I think they already know, just my intuition.” Eunwoo surmises, seeing the campsite, “I mean if you keep up the non-platonic kisses, they’ll know right when we walk in…which is right about now.”
“What happened to you guys?” Jinjin and MJ run to Eunwoo’s side, worriedly looking at both boys. Rocky and Sanha have also ran over, helping Eunwoo take off his backpack.
“This idiot here fell off a cliff and twisted his ankle.” Eunwoo says.
“I’m not an idiot!” Moonbin protests, yelling when Sanha curiously pokes at his right ankle. Eunwoo quickly whirls on his heels so that Moonbin’s ankle is out of Sanha’s reach, “Careful there, Sanha-ah.”
“I’ll go fetch dry pairs of clothes for you two then,” Rocky says. He winks at Moonbin and high-tails it out of there before Moonbin realizes what the wink entailed.
“I already know you’re planning to bandage Moonbin up, so MJ-hyung and I will make a fire. Right hyung?” Jinjin says slowly and elbows MJ, who had been eyeing Moonbin and Eunwoo curiously, in the ribs.
“Right! We’ll leave you two alone so we aren’t a bother. Of course, of course,” MJ exclaims, a bit too gleefully.
"Oh, I get it now."
Everyone in the vicinity turns in the direction of Sanha’s voice. The maknae has an elated smile on his face.
"You guys confessed to each other?” Sanha blurts out in delight, "Finally!"
Both Moonbin and Eunwoo turn red but make no move to force the others to retract their statements.
“Since everyone knows, we might as well take our leave.” Eunwoo says, a bit embarrassed.
“But hyung, how did they already find out? Are we just bad at keeping secrets?” Moonbin’s eyes widen, "Yah, I demand answers!" he whines, hitting Eunwoo's back as the visual tries to discreetly walk away.
Jinjin, MJ, and Sanha only laugh.
A week has passed since the camping incident. Other than the earful of reprimands the manager gave him upon seeing Moonbin's ankle tied up in a pretty, white cast, Moonbin doesn’t think much has changed actually. He and Eunwoo are still as close as ever; they’re best friends afterall. Maybe he has to suffer from the occasional teasing about kissing Eunwoo or the use of the boyfriend card that the others like to play against him. But that isn’t to say the other isn’t also suffering along with him. And maybe their kisses now aren’t as platonic as before, but Moonbin isn’t complaining. He’s glad things turned out the way they did.
“Bin-ah, I can hear you thinking all the way from the bottom bunk.” Eunwoo bluntly says in the dark, his soft laughter floating up and into Moonbin's ear.
“Then do you want me to climb down and have you shut it up for me?” Moonbin slyly asks.
Eunwoo rolls his eyes. “Of course, get down here.”