Chapter Text
“So, were you gonna through with it? Kill me, your sister?”
“I don’t know.”
Claudia let out an audible scoff as she remembered the words Soren had uttered to her just a few weeks before. The trees around her were silent witnesses to the anger that she felt throughout her body, and then to the release of breath that had her head buried in her hands and her shoulders hunched behind her.
“He would’ve killed me,” she whispered. The trees were still and there were no creatures around her. It was just her and her thoughts, and her confused emotions that should’ve been so easy for her to organize any other day.
She could feel wetness in the corners of her eyes but refused to cry. She would cry later when she had finally found a place to rest her head that wouldn’t end up with her being discovered.
What was she running from anyway? Was it wrong to want to keep one father when the other had left you behind? Was it wrong to want to prove that the elves and dragons truly saw the humans of Xadia as inferior beings that would never receive honest respect for their trials and tribulations? Was it justice that she wanted to bring, or love that she wanted to hold onto?
Claudia shifted her palms against her eyes. Another sigh left her lips. Was love even worth anything?
There hadn’t been much news since she had last seen Aaravos and escaped from her brother and Corvus save for the newly constructed city that she figured had a overcomplicated name.
Evrkynd. Sounds like something Terry would come up with.
The mention of Terry in her thoughts made her angry too, and brought with it the memories of the betrayal she had felt when he had colluded with Katolis and used her mother against her. Only Aaravos had been with her through the end, and she had lost him too and was left behind as everyone else got to rebuild their lives and go on as if nothing had truly happened.
Claudia sat up straight and let her hands fall from her eyes. She gripped the log tighter and could feel the headache starting in her head again. She could feel the rage that she had begun to feel everyday, but who was she angry with? She didn’t even know anymore, and didn’t want to think about it.
She knew it was childish, but she only wanted Aaravos back; the one person who hadn’t betrayed her but whose loss felt like betrayal anyway.
The trees were eerily still, and Claudia figured it was her. Everything was still around her and she hated the quiet. She hated being alone.
All she had asked for was to not be alone and to have her family with her. Why wouldn’t her wishes come true?
Claudia let out another long breath and stood up from the log with her cane in her hand. She looked out towards the path she had been taking, and the trees seemed to dull with her stare. She hated that there were no animals to talk to, no colors to admire, and no flowers to smell. She could feel the trees staring at her back as she started down the path.
There were no flowers here, no sun to blink away from her eyes, and no warmth that could make her feel fuzzy inside. Claudia could feel the ache that seemed to never leave settle in her chest, and she chose to ignore it.
She wanted to speak louder into the air, but her mouth didn’t want to move. Her face felt as if it too were weighed down by something, and moving any part of her that wouldn’t help her right now seemed more effort than it was worth.
The trees on her path seemed to darken, and she continued towards what she hoped would be the end of this gloomy place and its suffocating air.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
The never-ending forest did in fact have its end. Claudia let out a breath of relief and stopped to look around her. She had finally reached a clearing that was full of some sort of life: the flowers, the butterflies, and then the small pond that held tiny little fish.
She walked towards the pond and peered over the edge. The fish swam around as she placed her hand in the water.
“Aw”, she traced her fingers over its fins. “You’re so cute.”
The fish swam around her hand as if in understanding, the scales on its back glittering gold and black. Claudia could hear the thoughts race in the back of her mind as her brain dissected the fish into parts that she could and couldn’t use for any possible spells.
Yes, it was cute and cuddling her. But she couldn’t turn off the part of her mind that saw the purpose the fish could serve with its life, and she hated it in this moment. She shooed the fish away from her and cupped some water with her hands, and drank it. The dryness of her throat didn’t go away, and she let out a cough that startled her.
Claudia glanced around once more. The flowers of Xadia bloomed beautifully, and the sun was shining slightly through the trees. Her mouth twisted into a frown. There’s no place to lay low and hide here. She closed her eyes and rubbed her temples. Another headache was coming on.
She stood up from the ground slowly, and stretched her legs. Her prosthetic leg seemed to gleam in the light, and she stared at it for a while. It was holding up very well despite all that she had put it through in the past few weeks, and with the trust she had in Terry’s skills she knew it would last for much longer.
The rustling of the bushes nearby alerted Claudia to the presence of something watching her, and she turned around to see a small rabbit poking its ears out listening for any danger. Its’ ears flickered to Claudia, and it held still.
Claudia could’ve sworn it had stopped breathing, and she held her breath too.
The rabbit, disinterested, turned tail and ran back into the bushes that it had come from. Claudia could feel the small smile on her face twisting into an even deeper frown. “You weren’t that cute anyway”, she scoffed.
The staff in her hand crunched the leaves she stepped on louder than her feet did, and she gripped it tighter as she tried to find the path that the bunny had taken. She had wanted to enjoy the scenery, but she didn’t have the time. She was on a strict schedule to find a place for herself for a while, and she had already spent too much time traveling through the lands.
There was no clear-cut path that she could see, and it made Claudia groan.
Things just didn’t want to go her way. It pissed her off.
The anger she felt startled her; she wasn’t a violent person, not really. Where did all this energy to be angry come from?
Maybe it’s a good thing to be angry. It could keep her going, it could give her a reason to move forward and have no hesitation. It could be a tool just like her magic. It could serve a purpose.
Weren’t Dad and Aaravos angry too? They used it and it got them somewhere.
Grinning to herself after what felt like the first time in forever, Claudia headed along the invisible path she had begun to see in her head.
She could turn things around for herself. She had to believe that it was possible.