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Bucky let himself into my flat, it was Friday night and time for our weekly movie night. He had barely seen any movies, he preferred books, but it was my job as his best friend to show him every movie I personally loved.
He walked into to my flat, with a few snacks in his hands. I was already on the couch, I sent him a grin. The table in front of me already had two glasses on it, with a few different cans of drink in front of me.
"Hey you!" I say cheerfully. "Got the snacks?"
He sends me a lopsided grin as he shuts the door behind him, he held up the bag of crisps and a bag of popcorn with a little flourish.
"Got some weird flavour of popcorn they had at the store" He says, wrinkling his nose as he plops down next to me on the couch. "Caramel sea salt!"
He opens the bag of popcorn and places it on the table.
"You know I still think regular buttered is best but... figured we'd try this pretentious newfangled stuff." He starts opening bags with super soldier precision. "What're we watching tonight? Please tell me it's not another one of those rom-coms where people just don't communicate properly for two hours." He mock-shudders playfully.
"No" I say with a soft laugh. "We're actually watching one of my ultimate comfort movies"
Leaning forward with sudden interest, metal arm glinting in the lamplight as he grabs a handful of popcorn. "Oh yeah? Which one's got the honor tonight?" His blue eyes spark with curiosity as he studies my excited expression. "Please tell me it involves at least one decent fight scene. Or explosions. Both would be ideal." He pops some caramel popcorn in his mouth, immediately making a face at the sweetness but going back for more anyway.
"No, sorry Bucks" I say softly, blushing slightly. "It's called Casper, it's one of my favourites. It has ghosts, you might like it"
"Alright, I'll bite. But only because you look so damn pleased about this." He grins, popping the gummy in his mouth before pointing at you "But if this turns out to be secretly sad, and I know your 'comfort movies' usually have some emotional gut-punch, I'm throwing popcorn at you."
He grabs a throw blanket from beside him and starts arranging it over both of our laps. I roll my eyes playfully and get myself comfortable on the couch, I shivered slightly when our arms pressed together. My heart hammered at the domesticity of our situation. Two friends cuddled under a blanket about to watch a kids movies.
"Switch the lamp off, and I'll start the movie"
Bucky reaches beside me to the lamp, flicking the switch, and submerging the room in soft shadows. He leans back, shifting a bit so he was more comfortable.
"Alright, Casper time" There's a tinge of amusement in his voice, metal fingers tapping lightly against the sofa as he waits for me to start the movie.
I smile as the movie starts, my heart swelling at the comfort feeling the movie had always given me, ever since I was a little kid. I was captivated, completely caught up in the magic of the movie.
At the moment when Cat was sleeping, Casper leans in and whispers 'Can I keep you' my lips move with the words, mouthing them as my eyes are glued to the screen. I adored the quote, it was always something that had resonated with me.
Bucky nudges me gently with his elbow. "Hey," he says quietly, voice barely above a whisper so as not to interrupt the movie, "You say that line like it means something to you."
"When I was a little girl, I wanted nothing more than for someone to whisper it to me" I mumble, feeling my cheeks blush, my eyes never left the screen. "And it's just one of those unrealistic fluffy dreams"
"Unrealistic fluff, huh? Like a fairytale kind of stuff." He lets out a low hum, the sound half-amusement, half-sympathy. "Can't say I've ever had anyone whisper anything sweet into my ear like that"
"Maybe one day" I whisper, my attention going back to the movie.
"Yeah, maybe..."
The movie finally came to an end, Casper and Cat were dancing just before the movie ends and he whispers the words again as they danced to the music. And Casper whispers the words again. 'Can I keep you'
"You know it's total nonsense, right? No one in real life just magically whispers heartfelt lines like that." There's a slight edge of cynicism in his voice, reflecting his own experiences.
"Don't ruin this for me, Barnes" I mutter, giving him one of my playful glares. Bucky raises an eyebrow, smirking in response.
"Ruin it? I'm just keeping it real, darlin'. Can't have you expecting some Disney prince to swoop in and whisper sweet nothings in your ear." There's a hint of teasing affection in his voice. "But fine, I'll let you keep your silly romantic fantasies for now."
"Dick" I mutter playfully. "Want more snacks?"
"Damn right I do" He answers. "Do you have those sour gummy worms I like?"
"You know I always have a stash for you" I say as I stand up. I walk over to the kitchen and try to reach for the jar. It's one of those large glass jars that weigh a ton, it was far too large for my little kitchen, but anything to keep my best friend happy. I usually got the ladders out to put them away, being slightly too short. I pressed my body against the counter and reach, standing on my tippy toes.
"Bucks! Come help me reach?" I call out.
"All right, I'm coming, I'm coming." He gets up from the couch and saunters over to the kitchen, standing behind me with an air of exaggerated patience. "What do you need me to do? Lift the jar down for you?"
"If you want your sour gummy worms, yeah" I say, my body still pressed forward trying to reach, despite asking for his help.
Bucky huffs out a laugh, stepping closer he all but presses his body against mine, effortlessly plucking the jar off the shelf. He holds it above my head for a teasing second.
"You'd think after all this time you'd just put 'em lower for me" he teases, lowering the jar into your reach. "But nah, you like making me earn my treats." He leans against the counter next to me now, peering inside eagerly. "You did get my favourite flavor though. That's gotta count for something."
"It's the only place the damn jar fits" I mumble.
Bucky pops open the jar with one hand and grabs a handful of the gummy worms. "C'mon, pick another movie already, I know you've got more on that list of yours."
"Alright" I say as we walk back to the couch. I switch on the next movie. "It's called Knives Out, you'll love"
Bucky flops down next to me, popping more gummy worms into his mouth. "Knives Out, huh? Sounds... dark. You sure about this one, darlin'?" His eyes are playful, but there's a hint of wariness in his voice. I rolled my eyes and switch the movie on, I get myself comfortable on the couch next to him.
Bucky would make comments about how obvious the plot was, point out all the 'inconsistencies', and scoff loudly whenever anything mildly cheesy happened. But all that was his way of hiding the fact that he was actually enjoying the movie a lot more than he led on. I knew him, he acted like he hated every movie, but I knew he secretly liked them.
Occasionally he'd nudge me with his shoulder, stealing a few more of my sour gummies with lightning-fast reflexes.
As the movie goes on, I allow my head to drop down onto Bucky's shoulder. He tenses momentarily, he always did when we would touch. Not that it happened often, a head on the shoulder, a brush of our hands. But after a split second he would feel comfortable once more.
"You comfortable there?" He asks, his voice slightly gruff.
"Very" I mumble. He huffs out a soft laugh, shaking his head in mock-exasperation. But there's a small smile playing at the corner of his lips, and he doesn't make any move to push me off either.
"Course you are. You're just using me as a glorified pillow now," he teases, his voice holding a hint of fond affection.
"Bucky Barnes, the greatest pillow" I say with a giggle "You can use me as a pillow, that's allowed too you know"
"You're ridiculous, you know that right? Using each other as pillows... sounds like something outta a sappy movie." Despite his complaints, however, he finds himself leaning back with a content sigh, shifting a little so that my head is comfortably nestled against his shoulder.
"That's what best friends do" I say softly.
"Yeah... I guess they do." His voice is quiet. "Still think you're ridiculous though."
By the next movie, we had moved so much on the couch that I laid on the couch on my back, and Bucky had his head on my stomach whilst his body laid on the rest of my couch. We were somewhat comfortable as we watched the movie.
Bucky, usually so rigid and guarded, had somehow melted into the absurd position, head on my stomach like I was some kind of human pillow. His legs dangled slightly off the couch, but he made no move to adjust himself. There was something oddly peaceful about this moment.
"You know," he finally says after a long stretch of comfortable silence, "this is probably the weirdest way I've ever watched a movie."
"Me too" I say with a laugh. "Comfy though"
"Yeah... comfy," he agrees with a playful drawl. "You ever stop and think about how stupid we must look right now?" His tone is light, teasing.
"Nah, who cares, it's just us" I answer, the movie carries on, and I soon move my hand down to his hair, stroking him softly. His eyes flutter shut at the unexpected tenderness of my touch, a sigh escaping his lips. His usually tense muscles seem to loosen even more beneath my fingers, the sensation more soothing than he'd ever admit.
"Mhmm..." he murmurs quietly, almost unconsciously leaning into my touch just a little bit more. "Just us..."
After a while, I look down seeing his eyes shut, his breathing was heavier than usual against me. "You sleeping?"
His breathing had evened out into a steady rhythm, his mouth was slightly opened and the softest of snores started to feel the room. I smiled softly as I looked down at him, my heart swelled and my cheeks felt flush as I felt those feelings I had for him, the ones I had been ignoring for the years we had been friends.
"Can I keep you?" I whisper to him, my fingers never slowed. Bucky doesn't stir, deep in sleep, but for the briefest moment, a faint smile flickers across his lips. Whether from the softness of my touch or some quiet dream... or perhaps even my whispered words registering somewhere in his subconscious... it's impossible to tell.
The credits roll on unnoticed as we both stay like that, peaceful, comfortable, and utterly ridiculous. I turned the movie off, leaving the room dark. Bucky had stayed over plenty of times, but never like this. Maybe this was friendship. Maybe it was something else entirely. But for now? It was enough.
・・・・・
The next morning, I groan softly as I move. I woke up feeling heavy and achy all over. Bucky groans along with me as he stirs away from his sleep.
"Uh... mornin'" His voice is raspy with sleep, his hair a messy tangle. "You alright there? You seem... achy."
"You should try sleeping with a super soldier on ya, it hurts"
"Yeah... guess I'm not exactly lightweight," he admits with a smirk, stretching his arms over his head before rolling off the couch entirely. "Gotta say though," he adds casually while straightening out his wrinkled shirt "Waking up to find you were my personal pillow all night? Not the worst way to start a morning."
There’s something playful in his tone, but beneath it is an unspoken warmth neither of us will acknowledge outright. Instead, he just nudges my leg lightly with his foot before heading toward the kitchen.
"Coffee?" he calls over his shoulder, "Figure I owe ya at least that much for putting up with me crushing ya all night."
"Please" I whisper. I then stand up and walk to the kitchen, following him. "So last night... you were definitely asleep right? You didn't hear me say anything?"
Bucky busies himself with the coffee maker as I ask the question, measuring out grounds into the filter. He casts a quick glance over his shoulder at me, eyebrow slightly raised. "Uh, yeah, I was asleep most of the night. Why'd You ask? Did you say something... interesting? Something you don't want me to know about?" He grins mischievously, unable to completely hide his curiosity.
"No, nothing" I say with a quick shrug. "I was just curious if you were really sleeping" I add, I didn't need the embarrassment of Bucky knowing I whispered the words from the movie to him.
Bucky studies my face for a moment. "Uh huh, right, just 'curious" His tone dripping with sarcasm. "Well, I was asleep, no eavesdropping here" He glances at the coffee maker, impatiently checking the brewing progress.
"You wanna make an appearance tonight?" I ask, knowing one of Tony's bashes was happening tonight. As they did most weekends.
At the mention of the party, Bucky rolls his eyes dramatically. "Oh, great, a crowded room full of self-important rich folks... sounds like my idea of a good time." He sounds less than excited, but there's a touch of amusement in his eyes. "You really wanna go to that? It sounds like a headache."
"We don't have too" I say as I take my coffee. "Steve won't be happy if we miss it though, you know how he hates these social events"
Bucky takes a slow sip of his coffee, clearly mulling it over. He lets out a deep sigh before answering. "Yeah, yeah... you're right. He'll just give me that stupid disappointed puppy look if I skip out." He grimaces at the thought. "Alright, fine. We'll go, but only to save Stevie from having to make small talk with rich people alone." He smirks as he leans against the counter. "And we're bringing extra gummy worms in case I need an escape route."
"How can gummy worms be used in an escape?" I ask, if I wasn't so achy and tired I'm sure I would of laughed.
"Simple, I start flinging ‘em across the room as a distraction. The second someone sees sour gummies flying through the air? Pure chaos." He gestures dramatically with his coffee cup. "And while everyone’s scrambling to figure out why there’s gummies raining from nowhere? Boom. Exit stage left." His smirk widens as he takes another sip of coffee. "That, or I just shove them into Tony’s hands and say ‘here, entertain yourself.' Either way, escape achieved."
"You're funny, you know that Barnes" I mumble as I take another large gulp of my coffee, made to perfection. As per usual when Bucky made my coffee.
Bucky gives a mock bow, metal arm sweeping dramatically. "Why thank you, ma’am. I do aim to entertain." He straightens back up with a smirk. "But seriously, you laugh now, but when we’re knee-deep in boring rich people conversation and I start hurling gummy worms at the chandelier? You’ll be thanking me."
・・・・・
And so that evening, Bucky was wearing his suit, and I was wearing a long purple gown with heels. The dress glittered in the light of the party. Bucky and I walked into the large hall together, the music was loud, and the crowd was a plenty. I could see the team dotted around the room.
Bucky adjusts his tie with a grimace, looking entirely too stiff in the formal wear. His metal hand glints under the party lights as he glances around, clearly uncomfortable in the sea of posh socialites.
"Look at Steve's over there, already got that ‘please kill me now’ expression." He chuckles lowly before muttering under his breath, "Told you this was torture." Despite his grumbling, Bucky straightens up and starts weaving through the crowd toward Steve.
We stand and talk to Steve for a little while, until I notice one of the songs that started playing. It was the song from the movie we watched last night, the song were Casper and Cat dance, when he whispers those words I adored so much, when they kiss.
"It's the song from Casper, you know, the movie from yesterday... when they were dancing together at the end" I whispered to Bucky.
"Oh, hell, you're right." He lets out an exaggerated groan. "And here I was hoping we'd escape tonight without hearing any cheesy love songs from the '90s." He gives me a sideways glance, one eyebrow raised.
"Wait... you're not actually thinking of dancing, are you?"
"Like someone would dance with me" I mumble, a sadness washed over me for a moment. I wanted nothing more than to dance with someone, I always did at Tony's parties. But there was only one person I would even consider dancing with... Bucky.
Bucky's smirk softens into something unreadable as he looks down at me, just for a second. Then, with a dramatic sigh, he sets his drink aside and holds out his hand in an exaggeratedly formal gesture. "Alright, c'mon then. Can't have you standing around all sad like that." His voice is gruff but there's amusement beneath it. "But if anyone asks? You twisted my arm. Like, really hard." He leads me toward the dance floor.
Bucky leads me onto the dance floor, his grip on my hand gentle but firm as he takes my waist. Despite his earlier protests, there's something almost fluid in how he moves, the steps easy, as if dancing were muscle memory. He's still grumbling, of course, but his eyes twinkle with mischief as he leads me through the first few steps. "Can't believe I'm actually doing this, and to a song from Casper, no less. The things I do for you..."
"Thank you" I whisper, my heart pounded as my mind reeled, thinking about the scene again. It was beyond silly and I didn't care. That's why they're called fantasties. Bucky held me close to him, I was breathing in his scent and only him. It drove me insane. The room was loud, and crowded, but somehow I forgot all of that, only keeping my focus on Bucky.
Bucky gives me a small grin, his metal hand on my waist guiding me in time with the music. He moves surprisingly gracefully for his size, his gruff demeanor softened ever so slightly under the soft glow of the lights. "Don't mention it," he murmurs in response, his voice lower than usual. There's a gentleness in his touch as he leads me around the dance floor, far more tender than his usual rough-and-tumble exterior would suggest. For that moment, in the midst of the pompous ballroom, the world feels... surprisingly intimate.
"Bucky, can I admit something?" I whisper as we move. Bucky glances down at me, eyebrow raised in curiosity at the sudden seriousness in my tone. His hand on my waist seems to reflexively tighten its grip for a moment.
"Sure, go ahead," he replies, his voice soft but attentive. "What is it?"
"I like you" I say, the words leaving my lips and making me feel slightly numb, I felt on a high. I had been keeping this to myself for years and to finally say it. It was freeing. "More than best friends"
"You... like me more than just a friend?"
I nodded, scared of my voice for a moment. My throat felt tight.
Bucky exhales slowly, shaking his head in that fondly exasperated way of his, but the look in his eyes is undeniably soft. He doesn't let me go, doesn't step back. "Yeah... well..." He shifts slightly on his feet, grip adjusting on my waist as if to steady himself before muttering under his breath "Took you long enough to say it."
Then, in a move so uncharacteristically Bucky, he smirks and tugs me just a little closer. "Guess this means I don't gotta pretend anymore when people ask if we're 'just friends.'"
I roll my eyes playfully, though the scene from Casper still played in my mind. I had always wanted someone to whisper it to me. But like Bucky said last night, we didn't live in a movie land.
Bucky takes a deep breath, smirking down at me for a moment. Like he was reading my mind, reading my expression. He leans down, voice dropping to a murmur near my ear. "...Can I keep you?" Bucky says softly.
My eyes meet his. "You... mean it?"
"Course I do," he answers, voice gruff but without a hint of teasing. His thumb absently traces light circles on my back, the touch almost reverent in its gentleness."You're... important. To me. So yes, can I keep you?"
I lean in, ghosting my lips against his. I was shocked at the softness of his, even as they only brushed mine.
His breath catches as my lips brush his, the faintest contact that still sends a ripple of heat through me. His fingers dig into my waist for a moment, as if grounding himself, and then, almost instinctively, his hand moves up to cradle the nape of my neck. It's both tender and hungry at once, as if every second he's waited has culminated in this one moment. I hum softly into the kiss, tasting him, breathing him in.
Bucky gently deepens the kiss, tilting my head back ever so slightly to angle my mouth against his perfectly. His metal arm wraps around my back, holding me closer still, almost possessive in how tightly he pulls me against him. His touch is both soft and sure at once, his calloused fingers lightly digging into my skin like he can't get enough.
When the kiss finally breaks, he just rests his forehead against mine, eyes half-lidded as he savors the closeness between us. "Still need an answer" he murmurs, voice husky.
"My kiss not enough answer for you?" I ask playfully, my breath was a little heavier than before.
"Might need a little more convincing," he teases, his eyes glinting with mischief. His metal fingers trace idly up and down my spine, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. "You know, just to be absolutely sure."
"Of course, makes sense" I say with a grin, I move forward and press my lips to his again. We kiss as the next song ends. The moment is warm, so unlike his usual rough edges, and when we pull away, he lets out a breathless huff of amusement.
"Alright" He concedes with a smirk. "Consider me convinced" And then in a quieter tone laced with sincerity. "You're stuck with me now"
"Good, I want to be stuck with you" I say softly, the loud music and large group of people around us starting to bother me.
"You're too damn cute, you know that? Gonna make it real hard to be tough and stoic around you now."
"Wanna ditch the party?"
"Don't gotta ask me twice. Let's ditch this joint." Bucky smirks, already taking my hand and tugging me toward the door. "I didn't need to use the gummy worms afterall"
"Those bloody gummy worms" I mutter, we rush to the exit and I then stop. "Wait..."
"What is it?"
"Throw the gummy worms"
Bucky’s eyes light up with mischief, he digs into his pocket pulling out the gummy worms, and with a quick flick of his wrist, he sends a handful of gummies soaring into the crowd near Tony Stark’s general direction.
Then, grabs my hand again, he books it for the exit before anyone can turn around to see who threw them. "Operation: Gummy Distraction complete," he declares smugly once we were safely outside, "Now let's go home."
I squeeze his hand in mine and we finally leave the loudness, going back to my flat for probably another movie, a ton of snacks, and hopefully a lot more kissing.