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Everyone around them saw him as a demonic cultivator, the Yiling Laozu, a threat to the whole cultivation world, but to Lan Wangji, the said person was his most beloved person in this world, his Wei Ying.
Since the moment he first laid his eyes on him when they were 15, Wei Ying was his everything. Lan Zhan, who was raised with all the rules that required him to control his emotions, was a very interesting fellow to Wei Ying, whose smile shone as brightly as the sun. But there was so much sadness behind those eyes that the younger Wangji didn’t see. It is just as they say, ‘The loneliest people are the kindest. The saddest people smile the brightest. All because they do not wish to see anyone else suffer the way they do.’ At first Lan Zhan, who is unaware and ignorant of his own feelings, pushes Wei Ying away in fear that the little gremlin will cause a ripple in his peaceful life. But little did he know that until the time he comes to acknowledge his own feelings, his Wei Ying will be the one to push him away.
Now, as Lan Zhan drags his heavily wounded body across the ground, his mind is constantly replaying the words he heard just now, “Great news! Wei Wuxian has died! ” How could it be?? It must be nonsense... How can his Wei Ying die? These are the only thoughts that come to his mind as he tries to deny even the slightest possibility of the words being true. He just had to go and see for himself because it cannot be true at any cost. His heart desperately prays that all this is a lie and just another rumour people have spread about the Yiling Laozu. But alas, when was the world so kind to let people’s prayers come true? He had so many things to ask, so many things to say, to confess, how can Wei Ying just go like that? Miserable and helpless, he tries to communicate with Wei Ying’s spirit but it is of no avail. No other spirit knows what happened to his beloved neither do they know where he is now. Lan Wangji is now lost that what to do.
He wonders aimlessly from one place to another, playing his guqin in order to find anything that can tell him something about Wei Ying. Time keeps on flowing like a river but the currents are still not in Wangji’s favour. Just then he comes across a building hidden deep in the forest and what seems to look like a temple. The building looks like it hasn’t had any guests in thousands of years. The roof looks like it’s about to collapse at any given time. But it doesn’t concern Wangji for he is still grieving and mourning for his beloved. Just as he’s about to go from there, he hears a spirit’s voice, “Go on inside. Whatever you’re looking for shall be found there”.
Wangji at this point is ready to do anything and everything if it can give him anything about his beloved’s situation. He slams the door open and suddenly all the candles placed inside the temple starts to burn, illuminating the whole place. In front of Lan Wanji is a huge statue of some kind of god that he has never read or heard about. He instantly drops on his knees and his guts tell him that maybe this can help him find his Wei Ying. He keeps on kneeling there for a week straight, still hoping some miracle will occur. His mortal body starts to give out, not being able to withstand all the harsh things but doesn’t care about his wounds or pain because if this can help him find something about Wei Ying then it’s a small price to pay.
Finally, his body gives out. He is now lying on the floor of the temple, before the huge statue, taking his final breaths. Even in his last moments all he can think of, is his Wei Ying. He glances at the statue for the final time and starts screaming internally because his body is so weak that he can’t even produce a single noise. Tell me. What did he do wrong? If only I could go back in time... of all people... why Wei Ying ... He was everything to me. I’ll give you my breath, my voice, even my heart... Please, if there’s a god…I beg you... PLEASE BRING HIM BACK-!!!!
[Would you willing to give up your “---------”?]
He hears this as his final breath leaves his body and everything goes black.
Lan Wangji slowly opens his eyes as he feels someone shaking his body. “-ister”, “MISTER!” he hears someone’s voice and jolts awake instinctively. His body hurts all over and his head feels like it’s gonna blast anytime soon. He tries to move but it’s very hard for him to do so. He brings his hands closer to his face and stares at his palms when he realises something is wrong.
“Why are my hands all wrinkled..? They look older” he mumbles in a small voice not paying attention to his surroundings. He is pulled out of his daze by the same voice he heard before, “Why are you sleeping there? Are you ok?” He looks forward and sees a child not older than 3 years. His clothes look very dirty and his hair is all messy. But his eyes remind him of a certain someone, his beloved. “…….Wei Ying?” he whispers under his breath.
“Mister? Do you know A-ying?” the child points at himself and looks at Wangji’s face all confused because everyone there in the streets called him stinky brat instead of his real name. Lan Wangji’s whole world comes to a pause. He can’t believe that the small child in front of him, is his Wei Ying. His eyes starts tearing as he looks at the child in front of him and suddenly pulls him in a tight hug. “Wei Ying…. I missed you so much” Wangji mumbles in the embrace and startles little Wei Ying.
“Hey mister? Did you know A-ying’s mom and dad?” the child asks hopefully concealing his surprise in a small voice as if he’s afraid to be heard. Lan Wangji then remembers what he knew about Wei Ying’s parents. He had once heard his Shufu saying that Wei Ying’s mother was Cangse Sanren, the disciple of the famous Baoshan Sanren and his father was Wei Changze, the trusted right-hand man of sect leader of Yunmeng Jiang Clan. “Yes, we are good acquaintances.” Lan Wangji lies to little A-ying which makes him smile brightly. ‘Even when he was young, he smiled like that’ thinks Wangji as he remembers the smile of his beloved which was lost somewhere in the past. Wangji, who was a man of few words and expression, was now smiling in such a way that it clearly showed his emotions. After living in the streets for some time, Wei Ying was used to seeing people looking at him in disgust or anger but seeing the older man smile so softly at him, he feels a warmth in his heart and becomes happy.
Lan Wangji scans through his surroundings and finds himself in what seems like an alley, near from the bustling market of someplace. “Do you know where this place is?” Wangji asks to little A-ying to which he replies “Yes Mister! People call this place ‘Yiling’. A-ying has been living here for some time now so he is sure about this.” Wei Ying looks proud of his knowledge and Wangji softly pats on his head arranging his messy hair.
“What is your name, mister?” little A-ying asks Wangji. Just as he’s about to introduce himself, a sudden headache stops him. He remembers what happened before he blacked out. He can’t let his existence be known in this world. It would unnecessarily complicate things. “My name is Wangji. You can call me shushu. Will you come live with shushu?” Wei Ying’s eyes light up when the stranger in front of him asks him to call him uncle. He feels a sense of relief for the first time after his parent’s death.
Slowly his eyes are filled with tears of joy that there’s finally someone who is here for him. His mama told him that he has to be a good boy and someone will come and take care of him. “Yes shushu” the boy replies barely holding his tears. His shushu is now here so Wei Ying can finally rest. Now he won’t have to get beaten up by those store owners for eating their leftovers or fight with the dogs for scraps. He is so relieved. Wangji witnesses this and his heart breaks to see his beloved’s miserable life. But he’s here now so he’s definitely going to change it. He gently pulls the baby in a hug and consoles him telling that it’s all going to be all right now that he’s here.
Navigating a new place in a different time is hard. It is even harder when you’re trying to not get any attention. The first thing he does is take off his forehead ribbon. The very thing that was his identity, his resolution and his restrain comes off his forehead. He forsakes his past and his existence as he unties the knot. Instead it now serves as a hair tie. A new purpose for his ribbon signifying a new purpose of his life - To make Wei Ying’s life better.
Wangji becomes a rouge cultivator and Wei Ying follows his footsteps. The little old boy grows up travelling with his shushu feeling loved and cared. As the years went by, the little boy has now become a teenager. All the travelling experience has now made Wei Ying more than capable of cultivating and he even helps his Shushu in night hunts now. His life has been nothing but wonderful since his Wangji shushu found him that day.
In the spring of Wei Ying’s 15th year, he meets someone in Caiyi city. He and his shushu were staying there for a couple of weeks before going to a new place. After leaving his shushu at the inn, Wei Ying had gone out to get some supplies when he bumps into someone. With all his things now in the ground, he sighs and sits down to pick those up when another hand comes down to help him. When he lifts his eyes, it feels like time has come to a halt. Besides the man who’s down helping him pick up his things, there’s someone else. Both of their robes are pristine white and they have a forehead ribbon bearing a cloud symbol. He finds himself staring at the young master standing in front of him who seems to be going through something similar of his own.
All flustered, he thanks the both the young masters and runs away just as the other person is about to say something. He reaches the inn in record time and gives all the supplies to Wangji who’s waiting there for him. “Did something happened at the market, A-ying?” shushu asks. But nothing comes out of Wei Ying’s mouth. All he can think of right now is the man standing in front of him. Those eyes, that ribbon it all felt so familiar. Before he knows it, his face is all red and now his shushu, being a worry rat is going to be all worried for him.
A few days later, he meet those young masters again. This time, they were at the riverside, and the other man approached him first. “Xiansheng, I believe I didn’t apologize for the last time. I’m Lan Xichen and this is my brother Lan Wangji.” Wei Ying nervously introduces himself as a rouge cultivator while his eyes are definitely not looking at this Lan Wangji who’s staring at him very obviously. Xichen doesn’t miss this and takes this as a chance for his dear brother to make some friends because for the first time Wangji has final showed some interest in someone his age.
After this starts the series of ‘accidental’ meetings definitely not set up by Lan Xichen between Lan Wangji and Wei Ying. Xichen claims that he definitely did need that medicinal herb from Caiyi city and Wangji needs to pick it up by the store near to the inn Wei Ying is staying. By their third meeting, Wei Ying calls him by his birth name, Lan Zhan. He returns to the inn all happy chirping about his new friend to Shushu who is very happy for him. On his last day at Caiyi City, Wei Ying gifts bunnies to Lan Zhan promising to write him letters and keeping their friendship.
Over the years, this friendship blossoms into something else with more letters and visits. By his 18th year, Lan Zhan proposes to Wei Ying which he happily accepts. When he first brought Lan Zhan to meet his shushu, his shushu was speechless. He had never seen his shushu with that look in his eyes. It was as if he was about to cry … not out of sadness but relief. Now that he looks at it, Lan Zhan looks so much similar to his Shushu. Even the ribbons his shushu wears in his hair looks similar to what his Lan Zhan wears on his forehead.
But he doesn’t question it because he knows his shushu has one to many secrets that he’s never going to tell anyone. Years of growing up with him has taught Wei Ying a lot about his Shushu and Wei Ying doesn’t mind it because at the end of the day, it’s his Shushu who gave him this life. The wedding processions go smoothly and after a few days, he’s about to be Lan er’ furen.
“Wei Ying, do you love him?” asks his shushu as he’s getting ready for his wedding today. “Yeah shushu” he replies with a smile. “What do you love about him? Can you tell me?”… “Actually I was too shy to say this in front of Lan Zhan but, well first of all he’s very handsome.” His shushu looks at him dumbfounded. Wei Ying continues “Well it doesn’t mean I only like him because of his looks, but I can’t complain about him being handsome. He’s a man of few words and people around him tend to misunderstand him because of that but I know that he is a kind man who loves me a lot.”
His shushu looks at him with this indescribable look and says “If he finds out you’re thinking that, he’ll probably be very happy. He really is … blessed … that guy…” A smile forms on Wei Ying’s face as he adds “Oh and I love it when he looks at me. I really feel like ‘wow, someone in this world truly loves me’ His eyes don’t hide anything from me. Whenever I look into those eyes, I feel so important to him, like I’m the centre of his world. And you know …. I know it’s sudden … but thank you for being like a father to me. I love you”
Wangji’s eyes tear up as he hugs Wei Ying, now all ready in his wedding attire. ‘I loved you, Wei Ying. And I still do. I will always protect you. All I want is for you to be happy Wei Ying. In order to do that-
[Would you willing to give up your “Wei Ying”?]
I can give up anything.
You may love a different “me”, but I still love you. I’ll give up my whole life for you.’