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diction dripping with disdain

Summary:

“This is not funny!” Keiji squawks.

“Oh it totally is, dude.”

“I write fanfiction about him. He liked my promo tweet of fanfiction about him.”

Akinori keels over, laughing harder.

or: akaashi is a fanfiction writer. konoha is his beta reader. shenanigans ensue.

Notes:

Written as a treat for the Haikyuu Flash Exchange for November 2025: Platonic

To denduuu: Hello! When I saw your prompts, I instantly knew I needed to write this treat for you! This is my first time writing a fic with social media formatting, and I had so much fun writing it, so I hope you have just as much fun reading it!

(Title is from Oxford Comma by Vampire Weekend!)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

strix @threeofaces • 5h

New threadfic posted. Link below. ↴

20 comments 1k retweets 4.7k likes

mikhail @clockstrikestwelve

holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck

sharkes @livelaughgacha

strix-san, you always feed us so well!

i hate it here @setterprime

Reaction Photo of a Suprised Cat.

stelle @starryskies

how are you so good at writing this??

click to see more

strix @threeofaces • 3h

quote tweet of stelle @starryskies

how are you so good at writing this??

personal experience, unfortunately.

2 comments 25 likes

 


 

[11:25pm] Konoha Akinori

you tease your fans too much

[11:35pm] Keiji

They’re the ones reading fanfiction about professional volleyball players.

[11:37pm] Konoha Akinori

speaking of, great thread btw

[11:40pm] Keiji

Wow. Coming from my favorite beta reader… what an honor.

[11:41pm] Konoha Akinori

I’m your only beta reader???

[11:41pm] Keiji

Yeah.

[11:42pm] Konoha Akinori

fuck you dude

[11:46pm] Keiji

I’ll save that for the national team in my next post.

[11:47pm] Konoha Akinori

[11:47pm] Konoha Akinori

👀

 


 

rin @seijno

any1 else go to Teikyo Uni???

4 comments 1 retweet 5 likes

Aokirō @aokiro_12452

way to doxx urself

#1 shinx lover @blueevolutions

did no one teach you internet safety????

worlds next top setter @yourfavtooru

TEIKYO SUCKS LOLLLLLLL

hiro @akiyamas

…you saw it too?

 


 

new message to: hiro (@akiyamas)

[12:17pm] hiro

You saw it???

[1:02pm] rin

omg dude. how could i Not.

[1:14pm] hiro

He literally had ao3 on his laptop in the middle of class…

[1:14pm] hiro

AND he sits up front!

[1:17pm] rin

crazy shit!!!!

[1:18pm] hiro

I wouldn’t have even thought Bokuto knew what ao3 was…. He’s too much of a jock for that, right???

[1:23pm] rin

literally… I wonder who introduced him to it…

 


 

[12:35pm] Bokuto-san

KASHI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM YUOR BUGGEST FAN!!!!!!!!

[12:40pm] Keiji

Thank you Bokuto-san, but please pay attention to your class.

 


 

Konoha Akinori is lying on their couch, watching some sort of movie on the computer in his lap, when Keiji runs frantically into their apartment.

“Aki.” He stops in front of Akinori, breathless. He moves to sit up, intrigued. It’s not often that Keiji gets this frazzled over something.

“Wha-” Keji shoves his phone in his face. It takes a moment for Akinori’s vision to focus on the unexpected screen in front of him, but when it does his jaw almost drops.

He glances up from the screen to Keiji and back down again.

Holy shit.

“Holy shit.”

“I know.” Keiji drops onto the couch, forcing Akinori to move his feet closer to himself so he’s no longer splayed across the cushions. He grabs Keiji’s phone and continues scrolling, trying to make sure the notification of a volleyball Olympian liking Keiji’s tweet was real and not just Photoshop.

He grabs for his phone back and Akinori only complies due to the shocked, limp grip he has on it. Keji clicks it off and places is on the coffee table before planting his face in his hands and groaning.

Akinori makes a questioning hum, causing Keiji to look up at him. His cheeks are flushed and the expression he’s wearing is so less than mortified.

“My profile photo is him.

The quiet stands still between them. A minute passes and then-

Akinori starts laughing.

“Oh my god.”

“This is not funny!” Keiji squawks.

“Oh it totally is, dude.”

“I write fanfiction about him. He liked my promo tweet of fanfiction about him.”

Akinori keels over, laughing harder.

Once he catches his breath, he looks up at Keiji, face pink and a smug grin on his face that says he’s trying his hardest not to start laughing again. He raises his shoulder in a casual shrug.

“I’m sure he’s used to it by now.”

“I don’t want him to have to be used to it!”

“Okay, first of all: that is so parasocial of you man. Second: he liked your tweet, what, 5 minutes ago? He’s probably already clicked on your profile and is reading your pinned fic right now.”

Keiji stares at him and slowly reaches out for his phone, like a hunter trying not to let its prey know it’s intentions. Akinori is a little shit, though, and moves quicker. He grabs Keiji’s phone and holds it behind his back, smirking.

“Nope. Nope. No way you’re deleting the fic you worked on for a month. I’m not letting you.”

A groan. “I’m revoking your beta reading privileges."

He snorts. “Nah, you can’t do that. If you did, I’d just have to post the doc I have of all your terrible misspellings from when you write at 4 in the morning.”

Keiji leaps at him, now trying to grab both his own phone as well as Akinori’s laptop. “You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.”

They scramble, pulling their things just out of reach of each other. Still, a pinged notification makes them look up at the phone Akinori is now holding over his head.

Shit.

 


 

strix @threeofaces • 5 min

@taiki_official hhhhjjjkkkbbvvbb$&;/?/?$&&&$7

2 comments 3 retweets 17 likes

Imamura Taiki @taiki_official

? hi

Jack of All Trades @fallinglibra

Reaction Photo of a Laughing Cat.

 


 

strix @threeofaces • 1 min

I am very sorry to announce that, due to creative differences, @fallinglibra will no longer be my favorite beta reader.

Jack of All Trades @fallinglibra

Reaction Photo of a Scared Hamster.

yukie @yukippe

lmfao what did he do this time

 

Notes:

Thank you for reading! You can find me and my writing updates on BSKY or Twitter!