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The sky over Bangkok was heavy with dusk. The kind of velvet-blue evening that settles deep into your skin and makes the world feel a little slower, a little quieter.
William stood barefoot in front of the mirror, shirtless, towel hanging low on his hips, hair still damp from the shower. The bathroom was foggy, lit only by the golden spill of sunset through the bedroom windows.
His heart had been racing since five p.m.
It was now past six.
And he still hadn’t picked a shirt.
His bed was a graveyard of black clothing: a silky button-down, a sleeveless knit tank, his favorite soft cotton tee.
All black…Est liked him in black.
He’d once said so under his breath, after a photoshoot.
“You looked dangerous today.”
William had laughed, but something about the way Est said it ( quietly, as he like to do) had stuck.
Everything Est said stuck.
Everything Est did stuck.
Maybe even harder.
William ran a hand through his hair and stared at his own reflection, trying not to panic.
Tonight wasn’t just a dinner.
It was a chance.
He took his time to think about how it had started between the two of them.
Thamepo ended just a few months ago but the distance never caught the boys.
Some times other pairs fell into their own projects, their own lives.
But him and Est… they just can’t be separated.
The air between them always felt thick with something more.
But it wasn’t until one of their first trip together that the line blurred enough to shatter.
He remembered it too clearly.
It was late.
William couldn’t sleep.
They passed the whole day having fun, walking around, playing games, enjoying the pool.
Just like two friends…right?
He straight up on his bed just to find Est still awake, on the balcony.
Hoodie zipped up halfway, hair damp from the freezy air.
He approached him from behind, not silently enough because the older boy looked at him, with his usual smile.
“I couldn’t sleep”
William had sat beside him on the outdoor sofa.
Too close.
But Est didn’t move.
It started slow.
A brush of hands.
A look that lasted too long.
A kiss that felt like it had been waiting forever.
And later: skin against skin in the half-darkness of a shared bed, the ocean wind drifting through the open window.
Est didn’t speak much that night but his body had said everything that needed to be said.
They didn’t talk about it the next day.
But it happened again and again.
Like at Songkran.
That kiss everyone teased them about? It wasn’t their first.
It wasn’t even their second.
But it was the first time Est kissed him in public. Like Est, not Po or any other character.
They had gone back to Est house soaked, high on the adrenaline of the night.
William had pushed him up against the bathroom wall, hands in his hair, breathless laughter turning into gasps and groans.
And Est had clawed at his back like he needed to feel all of him, now, now, now.
But after that?
No labels, again.
Just… nights.
Many of them.
It was the day before they wrapped the LOL Fanfest, Their first ever concert together.
Both of them knew what it meant.
The adrenaline, the fun, the moments.
They did it all holding hands, together, just like how they started.
Standing on stage with the GMMTV lineup, drenched in sweat and applause, William had looked over his shoulder and caught Est watching him.
And he sees the affection.
But even something deeper, something longing
And William thought:
What if this is killing him too?
So after the show, when they were backstage, voices hoarse, the smell of energy drinks and glitters still on their faces, William had pulled Est aside.
“You doing anything on your birthday?”
Est had blinked. Shook his head.
“I want to take you out to dinner” William said, forcing his voice to stay steady. “Just me and you. Just like my birthday.”
There was a pause.
Est studied him like he was trying to read the words behind the ones he said.
Then, simply: “Okay.”
Now here he was.
Trying not to drown in his own nerves.
He finally chose one of the dark shirts. Zipped up halfway, let the collar stay open.
He reached for the cologne and of course he choose the one Est liked the most.
Sprayed once, just behind the ears.
Then the last two things:
The velvet box.
He slipped it into his jacket pocket, heart racing.
And the rose. White and trembling between his fingers like his fragile and young heart.
He checked his phone.
7:05 p.m.
He would get there early. Of course.
He needed a few minutes alone to breathe before seeing Est again.
The car ride to the restaurant was quiet.
His driver asked if he was okay.
William smiled and lied.
When he stepped into the dark private room of the rooftop restaurant, his breath caught.
The table was set. Candles flickered low. The room smelled like jasmine and heat.
He placed the rose on the table. The box beside it.
Sat down.
And waited.
Heart hammering.
Mind racing.
Every memory pressing into him like a bruise.
Tonight, he thought, please let me be brave enough.
Then here he is.
The door creaked open.
It was soft, barely a sound. But to William, it rang louder than the heart pounding in his ears.
He looked up fast, hand still clenched in his lap where he’d been gripping his phone without really seeing it.
Est stepped into the private room like he’d done it a thousand times, the city lights outlining his silhouette in silver.
He wore black. Of course he did.
A black shirt, slim-fitted, unbuttoned just enough to show a single gleam of skin at the collarbone.
His sleeves were rolled to the elbows, exposing forearms William knew too well: the strength in them and the softness too.
And his eyes.
Direct.
Focused entirely on William.
“Hi” he said simply.
William blinked. “You came.”
Est closed the door behind him with a soft click.
“Of course I did, silly.”
He laughed slightly.
That was it. Just that.
But something in his voice, made William exhale for the first time in ten minutes.
Est stepped closer, hands in his pockets, eyes flicking to the table, taking in the candlelight, the rose, the velvet box — and finally, William.
A soft, unreadable expression crossed his face.
Almost fond. Almost amused. But his mouth didn’t give it away.
And yet, somehow, William could hear him anyway.
“I got here early.” William said “Wanted to make sure everything was right.”
Est hummed. Approaching slowly.
“Looks good.”
He pulled out the chair across from William but didn’t sit yet. Instead, his fingers ghosted over the edge of the rose. He didn’t pick it up, just traced the stem lightly, then looked up.
“You brought me a flower?”
William swallowed. “Is that weird?”
Est shrugged, the corner of his mouth lifting. “No. Just… new.”
William tried to smile. “Trying new things, you know?”
Est finally sat.
And for a second, neither of them spoke.
The silence wasn’t awkward, it never was with Est.
William reached for his water. His hand shook slightly.
Est noticed, of course he did.
“You okay?”
“Just…” He exhaled, eyes on the candle. “You look good.”
Est smirked without showing teeth.
“So do you.”
William’s heart stuttered.
Est’s gaze didn’t waver. He looked at William the way he sometimes did after they kissed: like he was trying to memorize everything.
“I wasn’t sure you’d say yes.” William admitted quietly.
Est leaned back slightly. “Why not?”
“Because…” William hesitated. “Because I didn’t know if you wanted more. Or if what we’ve been doing is just… convenience.”
Est tilted his head slightly. “You mean the part where we fall asleep in the same bed four nights a week?”
William met his gaze, throat tight.
“That part. Yeah.”
Est’s eyes darkened just slightly. Not in anger, something more dangerous.
More vulnerable.
“You think I fall asleep next to just anyone?”
William opened his mouth. Closed it. He couldn’t speak.
Est leaned in, forearms on the table now, fingers steepled. The candlelight caught his lashes, his cheekbones. His mouth was so soft when he wasn’t smirking.
William feels a little shiver going all the way up on his spine.
“Do you remember the morning after Songkran?” Est asked suddenly.
William blinked. “Of course.”
“You were still asleep” Est continued, his voice a little lower now. “But you rolled over and held me like we’d done it a thousand times. I didn’t move. I just… let you do it.”
William’s breath hitched.
Est studied him. “That wasn’t habit. Or convenience, as you said it..”
William swallowed, chest rising and falling a little faster now.
“Then what was it?”
Est’s eyes were quiet for a moment. Then: “Just what i wanted.”
A pause.
William’s hands moved, slowly and cautiously, toward the center of the table.
He didn’t reach for Est, not yet.
But he left them there. Open.
For him.
If he wants.
Est’s gaze dropped to them. And then, without a word, he reached too. Fingers brushing fingers.
And it felt like the first real touch of the night.
Or maybe of their whole story.
“I brought you something.” William whispered.
Est glanced at the velvet box. “I saw it.”
William’s voice was a little unsteady. “Don’t open it yet. Just… wait until dessert.”
Est smiled. “Is it a ring?”
William choked on a laugh. “God, no.”
“Shame.”
Another brush of fingertips.
William exhaled slowly, removing his hand trembling and pushing it through his hair.
“I thought planning this would make me feel less… like this.”
Est tilted his head, just slightly. “Like what?”
William gave him a sideways smile, too shaky to land fully. “Like my stomach’s in a blender.”
Est’s lips curved. He didn’t tease. Didn’t soften it with a joke.
Instead, he just said, “You always worry too much.”
William blinked at that. “Is that a bad thing?”
Est shook his head once. “No.” A pause. “It shows how much you care, actually.”
William looked down at the table, suddenly too aware of everything.
The wine glasses. The candles. The rose still lying untouched between them.
And then — the food.
“Oh—right.” His eyes lit up, words rushing to fill the silence like breath after holding too long.
“Okay, so. I thought a lot about what to order.”
Est raised a brow, amused now. “You planned the menu?”
“Obviously.” William said, sitting up straighter, voice picking up energy.
“I know what you hate, which is like half of Thai fusion, so I made them keep it clean. Traditional stuff. Comfort food but dressed up, you know?”
Est’s mouth quirked, softly. “Like us, then.”
William blinked. Est didn’t elaborate. Just leaned back again as the first course arrived: a refined version of tom kha gai, served in delicate white porcelain, steam rising gently in the candlelight.
“They made it less creamy,” William pointed out as the server bowed out. “Like how you like it. And no mushrooms.”
Est lifted a spoon to his mouth, eyes flicking up. He didn’t speak immediately. Just tasted. Swallowed.
Then nodded, approving. “You really did plan this.”
William smiled into his own bowl. “What can I say? Worrying too much has its perk”
Est laughed.
And then the mood softened, a little lighter now, the worst of the nerves behind him.
They chatted between bites. Their feet brushed once under the table and neither of them moved.
Est never rushed his food. William watched him sometimes more than he ate, his own plate half-touched as he drank him in, the relaxed set of his shoulders, the slight line between his brows when something caught in his mind.
“How’s your throat between ?” Est asked at one point.
William groaned. “From the performance you mean? It’s good, I just need to let it relax for a few days.”
Est chuckled. “Worth it though. You killed those performance.”
William lit up like someone turned a key in his chest. “You think so?”
Est nodded. “You looked… so free.”
William took a sip of water, trying not to grin too hard. “The stages were insane. Everyone went feral. I loved it.“
Est smirked faintly. “You were louder than all of them.”
William rolled his eyes but didn’t deny it. “Fine. I had my fun. But shall I talk about you? Held upside down and showing everyone those abs…” The tease was evident but his voice turned soft again.
“You looked like you weren’t even nervous. Like you owned it.”
Est paused, fork poised mid-air. “I wasn’t trying to own anything.”
William’s eyes dropped to Est’s hands. “You did anyway.”
The second course arrived: grilled river prawns and jasmine rice, spiced just enough, plated with flowers William had forgotten he approved.
Est reached for his plate calmly.
William couldn’t stop watching the way his fingers moved
Slow, graceful and precise.
Est caught the look. “Eat.”
William flushed, looking down quickly. “Right. Eating.”
They continued to talk; about the fans, the cake for Est, the PerthSanta kiss, the backstage scenes.
At one point, Est reached into his phone to pull up a photo of William doing finger hearts with Phuwin and Pond while cross-eyed.
“Delete that” William said, half-choking on a laugh.
“No.” Est said laughing, scrolling again, slower this time. Then he stopped.
“This one’s good.”
William leaned closer.
The photo was of them. Not posed. Taken by someone else.
They were laughing. William had his head tipped toward Est’s shoulder, eyes closed mid-laugh. Est was watching him, smile just barely there, like he didn’t know a camera existed.
William swallowed hard.
“You look happy,” he said quietly.
Est didn’t look at him. “I am.”
Another pause. Another moment too thick to touch.
William looked away from the photo first, throat tight, and reached for the wine. “We’re gonna get emotional before dessert if we keep this up.”
Est raised his glass. “Then maybe don’t get too sentimental.”
“Says the guy who kept staring at me while we were singing” William muttered.
“I wasn’t staring.”
“You were literally staring.”
“I was listening.”
“To what?”
Est looked up, eyes serious now. “The part where you were singing all those love words, they looked so real..”
That silenced William. Just for a second.
Then softly, “It did.”
Their eyes locked. And for a moment, even the candles flickered.
A soft knock on the door broke the moment.
The server entered like a whisper, barely disturbing the candlelight, and placed two elegant plates on the table. Dark chocolate mousse, glossy and perfect, dusted with gold leaf and something sugared.
A small flame flickered in the center — Est’s birthday candle.
The room hushed again as the door closed.
Est stared at the dessert for a second, then huffed a quiet laugh through his nose. “You really went all in, huh?”
William shrugged, trying to ignore the way his pulse jumped just hearing him laugh like that, the most beautiful sound.
“You only turn twenty-four once.”
“I turned twenty-four this morning,” Est said.
William leaned back in his seat. “Then I’m already late.”
Est looked up, amused.
William reached into his jacket pocket.
Pulled out the velvet box. For a second, he just held it. His thumb brushed the edge.
Then he slid it across the table.
Est blinked. Looked down.
He didn’t touch it immediately.
“So what is it?”
William watched him. Every twitch of his fingers. Every breath.
He then gave him a small, nervous smile.
“Just open it.”
Est’s fingers were careful as they lifted the lid.
Inside, nestled in black velvet, was a thin silver bracelet. Simple and Elegant.
The kind Est liked. Simple and beautiful like him.
On the inside, engraved in tiny script, were two letters:
W. & E.
Est stared at it for a long time.
No reaction. No smile. Just silence.
William’s heart sank, the kind of slow, sinking dread that bloomed in his chest like ink in water.
“I… I didn’t want to make it weird,” he said quickly. “You don’t have to wear it or anything, I just—”
Est looked up.
Still no words. But his eyes were full of something the young William couldn’t read.
Then, slowly, Est took it from the box.
“Put it on me?” Est asked softly, looking at him with his big beautiful eyes.
William froze. Then nodded.
He rose from his seat and walked around the table. Est turned slightly in his chair to offer his wrist.
William kneeled next to him, fingers trembling just enough to make him slow down. He looped the bracelet around Est’s wrist, clasping it in place with a soft click.
And then… he didn’t move.
He stayed there, on one knee, face level with Est’s.
Their legs brushed.
Est’s breath hitched.
“Looks good on you.” William whispered.
Est turned his wrist, watching the bracelet glint in the candlelight. “You remembered I like it simple.”
“Of course I did.”
Another pause.
“I remember everything about you.”
And then, Est reached out, fingertips brushing the collar of William’s shirt.
William rose slightly, still kneeling but closer and Est met him halfway.
Their foreheads touched first. A pause.
Then their noses.
Then their lips.
The kiss started slow. Careful.
But William’s hand slid up, threading into Est’s hair, and that was all it took.
Est opened his mouth on a gasp. William swallowed it whole.
They didn’t rush.
They savored very minute, every movement.
Soft lips, tongue, breath, the press of a hand at the nape of a neck, the squeeze of a thigh.
William’s body turned completely toward Est.
The candlelight danced against their skin.
“You’re shaking.” Est whispered against his mouth.
William laughed breathlessly. “You have that effect on people.”
Est kissed him again. Deeper this time. Slower.
It was definitely time for the bill.
The cab ride was silent.
Every second between them vibrating with the weight of what they’d just done, what was coming next.
No words. Just glances.
The elevator ride up to Est’s apartment was worse. Close, claustrophobic, as William’s heart was thudding so loud he was sure Est could hear it.
Their hands brushed.
William reached for Est’s wrist. Touched the bracelet. His name engraved there.
Est didn’t say anything.
The second the door shut behind them, everything changed.
William turned to say something, maybe a joke, maybe just his name, but Est stepped forward and kissed him like they’d already waited too long.
Hands found mouths. Bodies collided like magnets. Est’s fingers dove under William’s shirt, nails dragging up his spine. William gasped into his mouth, already hard, already trembling with the sheer want of him.
They didn’t stumble to the bedroom.
They didn’t need to.
The wall just past the front door was enough.
William shoved him gently against it, kissed down his throat, dragged his teeth along that spot that made Est arch into him.
“Is it clearer now?” Est breathed, panting“There was always only you.”
William huffed a laugh against his skin. “It better be, I’m never letting anyone seeing you like this.”
“Good.”
Est grabbed the hem of William’s shirt and ripped it up over his head. Threw it somewhere. William returned the favor, sliding Est’s black button, up off his shoulders, hands roaming over skin he already knew too well but never got tired of.
Est was flushed. Eyes dark. Breathing hard.
William ducked to kiss his chest. Bit just above his heart.
Est hissed. “You’re always so—”
“Thirsty for you? Yeah.”
Est laughed, breathless, then cut it off with another kiss.
A messy one.
His hands were already on William’s belt, fingers fumbling, impatient.
“Bed?” William managed, barely.
Est nodded. “Please.”
They made it to the bedroom half-dressed.
William pushed him down onto the sheets and just looked at him for a second.
Est, sprawled out, hair a mess, eyes half-lidded, lips red and swollen.
The bracelet still on his wrist.
His name engraved on the other boy wrist.
William crawled over him like a starved man.
He kissed him again, slower this time, pouring everything into it.
Everything he hadn’t said before. Every inch of longing and fear and love and need.
Est moaned into his mouth. Pulled him closer.
William moved lower. Mouth on his chest. His stomach. His hipbones.
By the time he finally undressed him completely, Est was trembling.
“You do this to me.” Est whispered, hands tangled in William’s hair. “You make me forget how to breathe.”
William looked up at him, eyes burning.
He kissed down.
He worshipped his man like a god.
He tasted every inch of him like he was the most savory food.
And when he slid inside, Est’s gasp was just like a prayer.
Their rhythm was a slow burn and then a crash.
William moved like he was trying to memorize him.
Every inch on him.
Hands all over, mouth on every part of his skin.
Est met him thrust for thrust, matching every moan, every whimper with one of his own.
The room filled with the sounds of skin, breath, heat, name after name after name.
When they finally fell apart, together, it was with hands clenched and lips locked.
William collapsed beside him, dragging the sheet up, pulling Est close.
They lay there in silence. Chests heaving. Heartbeats out of sync.
Est reached for him, playing with their fingers together.
The bracelet glinted in the dark.
“You can’t run away from me anymore.” William whispered, voice hoarse, looking at the bracelet on the older’s hand.
Est kissed his cheek. “I’m not going anywhere without you.”
William kissed his hand.
Then the bracelet.
And finally, with their breaths as a lullaby they both fell asleep.
Smiling.
In love.