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Chapter Text

“Hello?” said Finn. “Uh—Miss Vampire?” There was no reply from the cold cell door. “I can leave if you want,” he said. “I mean—I gave Peppermint Butler my finger to get directions. So I kind of don’t want to. Not—like—I don’t want to make you feel bad or anything. I just wanted to talk to you.”

This was a very, very bad idea. He had heard rumors about the vampire the Princess kept in her dungeon, but there were always rumors about what the Princess kept in her dungeon. “Mother’s afraid of it,” his foster sister had said, but Finn hadn’t believed her. “She’s not afraid of anything.”

But Finn knew that there was a vampire in the dungeon, because he had seen it. He had gone to the lab to bring the Princess a report on a quest, and he had seen Princess Bubblegum standing in the middle of a tangle of wires, with a humanoid figure clinging to her, its withered, burnt arms wrapped tightly around the Princess’s shoulders, face buried in her hair. Instruments beeped and blinked around it. Finn didn’t move. The vampire had seen him. She had looked up with red vampire eyes, and she had mouthed “run.”

Finn was allowed to see experiments. He was allowed to see them even when they got ugly, because the Princess trusted that he would understand. But when the vampire had told him to run, he had fled. There was something wrong in the Princess’s lab. There were secrets in the castle. There were things you weren’t supposed to see. He knew immediately that he had seen one of them.

“Hey,” said a voice from inside. It didn’t sound like Finn had expected. It didn’t sound like a monster. “Finn, right? The Candy Knight?”

“Yeah.”

“I told you to run.”

“I know,” he said. “But—“

“I guess I should have expected this.”

“Are you the vampire?”

“Yeah.”

“I wasn’t supposed to see you.”

“No,” said the vampire.

“Why?” said Finn. “Why did you try to protect me?”

“Bonnie would have killed you,” she said.

Finn flinched.

“She’ll definitely kill you if she catches you talking to me,” said the vampire. “Look. Dude. Go back to bed. You’ve got it good here, Finn. She likes you. Don’t donk it up for yourself”

“But you’re evil,“ said Finn. “My sister says the Princess is scared of you.”

“I bet she is.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Look,” said the vampire. “Maybe a monster still doesn’t want to see a kid die.”

“But—” said Finn.

The vampire cackled.

“What did you do to get locked up here?”

“I tried to kill Princess Bubblegum and destroy the kingdom,” said the vampire. “Because I hate beauty and goodness and her stupid face, and I wanted to plunge the continent into darkness and chaos forever.”

“That’s not true,” said Finn.

The vampire laughed a little more warmly. “Go to bed, man.”

Finn sat on the edge of the roof of the castle. The first city sprawled out below the castle wall. The whole thing seemed to glow gold, a spiderweb of streets that stretched out towards the horizon. Here, by the castle, streets were wide and manicured, dotted with gardens and cotton candy trees. These were the pretty frosted homes of the Court and the castle staff. Behind a grove of trees was the primary barracks, quietly tucked out of sight. Around the second wall, though, the skyline was crowded with high twisted towers and neon lights in shining pastels. Hoverbikes raced through the crowded streets. Tall, holographic billboards dotted the city.

He couldn’t see farther than that—not to the third wall. Beyond it were cotton candy trees and rows and rows of candy corn, with towers clustered on the horizon in every direction. Even here, the city was never quiet. A nightclub by the second wall pulsed with music, mingling with the violins from the ballroom. Someone shouted from a balcony. The drones whirred above his head. He closed his eyes. The castle had rules. There were questions you weren’t supposed to ask. Places you weren’t supposed to go. Sometimes people would disappear, and everyone would know why, and you knew not to bring it up. That was how it worked. That was how it had to work. If someone slipped the whole thing could come crashing down. The kingdom was delicately balanced, she had explained. One thing going wrong could put them in all danger.

The last thing he had met in her dungeon had been the Lich. There were good reasons the Princess needed to be careful.

“I’ve figured it out,” said Finn two weeks later. It had been an even worse idea to come back. “You’re trying to turn me against the kingdom.”

“You’re really pushing your luck, man,” said the vampire. “Can’t your sister read minds?”

“No,” said Finn. “I mean, like. Yeah. Not usually. Her eye is sewn shut.”

“Shit,” said the vampire. “I guess that’s how she decided to deal with that.”

“Well, it won’t work,” said Finn, feeling like he’d lost control of the conversation.

“What?” said the vampire. “Oh, right. My evil scheme.”

“I’m a hero,” said Finn. “I’ll never betray the Princess.”

“Didn’t think you would,” said the vampire. “You actually trust her. You don’t have any wires in your brain. You’re not built for her. You’re just—actually loyal. That's rarer than you’d think.”

“Yeah!” said Finn. “Wait—“

“Yeah?”

That didn’t seem right, he thought. “How do you know so much about me?”

“Dungeon gossip,” said the vampire. “You know.”

“Oh,” said Finn. “Ok.”

“Look,” said the vampire. “If I tell you what my deal is, will you stop trying to get yourself killed?”

“No promises,” said Finn. “And also I don’t trust you.”

The vampire laughed. “Alright, man. Fair enough.”

She didn’t elaborate. “Wait,” said Finn. “I still want to know.”

“Promise me you’ll at least take out your tracker.”

“I already did,” said Finn. “I keep it in my backpack when I’m on missions and stuff. And I’m cloaked, and I—”

“Alright, dang,” said the vampire. “Thats kinda punk, little man.”

Finn smiled.

The castle had rules, and Finn had broken them, and somehow he was still alive. Nothing had happened. Except that once the Princess had pulled him aside, and pointed to a chambermaid. “She’s a spy,” she had said with barely contained delight. “She doesn’t think I know. Your—“ she poked him in the shoulder “fiancée sent her. She’s planning something. But I have it under control.”

And then the chambermaid had been gone. That was how the castle worked. The Princess might know he was talking to the vampire. She might just be waiting. A month passed, and then another.

“Finn?” said Princess Bubblegum. “Finn?”

He snapped back. He was sitting at the head table by the Princess’s left side. To her right, Goliad was doing her best impression of the Princess’s smug little smile.

“You drifted off there,” she said.

He shook his head. “Sorry, Princess.”

She laughed lightly. “Finn, I was just telling the Duke about the dragon you fought last week.” She smiled at him. “I’m really proud of you.”

“Oh! Yeah!” he said. “Yeah. Just doing my job.”

“You’re a very brave young man, Candy Knight,” said the Duke of Nuts. The Princess was watching the Duke like Timmy stalking a feather toy.

She’s going to crush you, thought Finn. “Thank you,” he said.

“Well,” said the Duke. He stood in front of the table. The Princess watched him with a small smile. A second ticked by, and then another.

“Dismissed,” she said. He bowed and then fled.

“Fine,” the vampire had said. “Bonnie used to be my friend. We betrayed each other. She won.”

The third time he visited the vampire, Princess Bubblegum was there. He heard her voice before he turned the corner.

“I wish you could meet my family,” she said, and Finn froze. “I know, that’s silly—” She laughed lightly. “But I think you’d like them.”

He could try to run again. It might work. The tunnel was long and echoey and dotted with eyes, and she could remotely disable a cloak if she suspected someone was there. He waited.

“I guess you’re not feeling chatty,” said the Princess. Finn peaked around the corner. She was sitting on the stone dungeon floor, her back against the heavy iron cell door. Her suit jacket was draped over her arm, and her tie hung loosely around her neck. There was a remote in her hand. “That’s fine. I won’t force you.” She sighed. “If you could just—this would be easier with your help, Marceline.”

Marceline. The vampire was named Marceline. Someone, somewhere, had cared enough to give the vampire a name. Bonnie used to be my friend, she had said.

He uncloaked. “Princess?” he called. “Are you there?”

He heard her gasp, and his heart skipped. “Finn?” she said. He heard her footsteps draw closer. “Finn, what are you doing here?”

“I was looking for you,” he said. “I needed to talk to you about something, and Pep said you were probably in the dungeons.”

“He shouldn’t have told you that,” she said gently, rounding the corner, and Finn felt a stab of guilt. Peppermint Butler would be fine, probably. He was too important for anything really bad to happen to him. “But that’s alright. What did you need to talk about?”

“I don’t want to marry Phoebe,” he said. No. That was the wrong thing to say.

“Oh, Finn,” said the Princess. “You know her father and I have an agreement.”

“Can’t you call it off?” he said. “He has to listen to you. You’re the Princess.”

“I wish it was that simple,” said the Princess. “You know the situation with the flame county is delicate.”

“I know—I’m sorry, Princess. I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“That’s ok,” she said. “I want you to tell me anything that’s bothering you.” She glanced backwards, quickly, to the vampire’s—Marceline’s—cell. “Come on,” she said. “Let’s get out of here.”

She didn’t take him back through the secret tunnel. They wound up through the dungeon. It got less quiet. Less empty. He heard someone lose at a card game—laughingly cursing his friends as he threw down his cards. He heard someone else playing the guitar. Someone was weeping in the corner of her cell.

But chatter died when the Princess passed by. As soon as she entered a block of cells it went quiet. The girl weeping froze, hands pressed to her eyes. The prisoners watched them. The guards stood up straighter. It stayed quiet until they were out of earshot.

He always took the same route that the Princess probably did to see the vampire—an empty staircase, dimly lit and dotted with eyes in the walls, cutting straight through stone to the lower levels, where dangerous prisoners were held completely alone in the dark. No one would see the Princess visit the vampire. No one would see him either.

He didn’t like seeing this much of the dungeon. He especially didn’t like seeing people he had put in there. It was the kind of thing Goliad made fun of him for. He knew why they had to be there. He knew they were dangerous. He knew every single one had been locked up for a good reason.

But he still didn’t like it.

“We’re almost there,” said Princess Bubblegum. “I really do appreciate your sympathy for them.”

“Really?”

“Of course,” she said. “It helps to remind me how important it is to be fair to them. To be a good ruler. You can’t let sentiment make your decisions for you, of course—” She grinned. “Which is why I’m the Princess, and you’re not. But it’s good to consider these things.”

“Princess—if you—” he said. “If I thought you were doing something wrong—”

She stopped walking. Turned. Bent down to his level. “Do you?”

“If I did—”

“I’d want you to tell me, Finn,’ she said softly. “You know that.”

“Dude, you played that so good,” said Marceline. “I’m impressed. I was sure that’d be it for you.”

“Do you think she’s figured out—”

“Nah,” said Marceline. “She’d come crying to me if she knew her ward had betrayed her.”

“I wish I could talk to her about this,” said Finn. “Or—anyone, really. Even Goliad, even though she’d just say I’m being a baby. Maybe you’re just really good at jacking with my brain and I can’t figure it out because I’m not that smart.”

“I think you’re pretty smart,” said Marceline. “You’re not dead yet. That’s something.”

“I don’t get why you have to stay locked up in here,” said Finn. “You’re not dangerous, I don’t think.”

“Yes I am, Finn.”

“To the kingdom, I mean.”

“Finn—” said Marceline. “You really believe in her, don’t you?”

“Of course I do! That’s why none of this makes sense!”

“You’re just a kid, man,” said Marceline.

“That’s what everyone says!”

“You’re right,” said Marceline. “That’s my bad.”

“The Princess is good to people,” said Finn. “She keeps people safe. She takes care of them. She feeds people with her sweet bio-engineering. Ooo was a wasteland before her. The first safe city after the mushroom war was the Candy Kingdom capital. I know you’ve got some kind of personal biz with her, but—”

“Some personal biz,” said Marceline drily. “That’s one way of putting it.”

“But you can’t pretend the Candy Kingdom isn’t a good thing,” said Finn. “Not perfect. I know that. But good. People don’t have to be scared all the time. Because we protect them.”

Marceline made a noise that almost sounded like a laugh.

“A few years ago I fought the Lich,” said Finn. Marceline hissed. “It nearly killed the Princess, Marceline. It nearly killed everyone. Everything is so close to falling apart, man. I don’t like—I don’t always like how the Princess does things, but we need her. The continent needs her.”

“Dude,” said Marceline. “Yeah. I get it.”

“You do?”

“I mean, like. You’re wrong. But I get it.”

“But I don't get you,” said Finn. “You don’t make sense.”

“I’m here for the same reason as everyone else, Finn,” said Marceline. “I’m a threat to the kingdom.”

“Why do I trust you?” said Finn.

—

“Candy Knight,” said Goliad. “Target #14-4-10 at two o’ clock.”

“I see him, Goliad,” said Finn. “Can we get a light?” A searchlight flooded the alley. “Perfect.”

The target wasn’t hard to track. Every camera in the city swiveled to follow him. Now the searchlight was locked.

The target froze. He was candy, which made it an easy assignment. He would never have known anything but the sweep of the searchlights and the whirr of the drones. It was in his bones. Which he might not have. That wasn’t the point. The point was that Candy People froze when anyone from the Court so much as looked at them. He stood shaking in the light of the drone as Finn dropped to the alley in front of him, sword drawn. Goliad stalked the roof above them.

“Candy Knight—” said the target. “I’m sorry. Please.”

“No,” said Finn. This was easy. This made sense. “You broke the law.”

The target had been friends with a dissident who the Princess had replaced. And then he’d sliced the replacement in half with a kitchen knife. It had seemed stupid and impulsive and unplanned. They had caught it on three different cameras. The target had panicked and fled. He had no connections and nowhere to run.

“I don’t want to—” said the target. Finn should have been paying attention. It was an easy, routine assignment. He had been distracted. Overconfident. He should have already been too close for the target to draw a weapon faster than him.

The death ray fired right as Goliad pounced, sending the beam of light ricocheting through the air.

“Excellent work, Candy Knight,” she said smugly, paw pressing the target into the street. “I especially liked when you spaced out and I had to save your butt.”

“I didn’t think he’d have a gun!” said Finn.

Goliad inspected it, her neck twisting. “Stolen, as I suspected,” she said. She grinned. “Mother will want to know who was careless enough to lose this.”

Finn’s stomach twisted. “Right,” he said. “Yeah.”

“It’s funny, Finn,” said Goliad.

He felt sick. “Can you let him get up?” said Finn.

Goliad huffed. She grabbed the gun in her teeth, and stepped back, sitting primly on her haunches.

The target—a small upside down ice cream cone—slowly stood up.

“We have to take you back to the castle,” said Finn. He tried to look intimidating.

“The Candy Knight,” said Goliad. “Will take you back to the castle. I have more important work to do.”

“What—” said Finn. “Goliad!”

“We need to keep a united front, Finn,” said Goliad. “No arguing. Just like mother says.” And then she was gone.

“Hey man,” said Finn.

“Hey,” said the target warily.

“Are you gonna try to run again?”

“Nah,” said the target. “Wouldn’t do any good.”

“Cool.”

“Yeah.”

“You want to start walking, or?”

“Not really.” But he did. The searchlight swept away and the drones whirring faded, leaving them in the flickering street lights of a back alley. Finn followed him, sword drawn, but it didn’t matter. The fight had gone out of the target. He just looked tired.

“Stop,” said Finn, once they reached the corner. He activated his beacon. “We’re waiting for a car.”

“It wasn’t his fault,” said the target. “That thing.”

“What?”

“The—you know. The clone. It’s not like he had a choice.”

“You’re a criminal,” said Finn.

“Is he alright?”

“What? Yeah. Of course.”

“Ok.”

“You’re not allowed to slice people in half,” said Finn. “Are you trying to make me feel bad for you?”

“No,” said the target. “I guess I kind of don’t care anymore.”

“Marceline?” said Finn.

“What’s up.”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

She laughed. “So you came here?”

“Marcy, who were you? Before?”

She exhaled. “That’s kind of a big question, man.”

“I know,” he said. “Just tell me one thing. I don’t know anything about you.”

“Well,” said Marceline. “I guess I used to be a rockstar.”

“No way.”

“That’s how I met Bonnie, actually,” said Marceline. “She came to one of my concerts.”

“I don’t want to talk about her,” said Finn.

“Real.” said Marceline. “Ok, yeah. I was a rockstar. I had this sick bass—”

“You played the bass?” said Finn.

“Hell yeah I did,” said Marceline. “I used to sing, too. I was really good.”

“Can I hear something?”

“No way,” said Marceline. “I’m way out of practice. Plus all my songs were about my ex.”

Finn thought for a moment. “The one we don’t want to talk about?”

It was quiet. “Yeah,” said Marceline. “Alright. Your turn.”

“What?”

“Something I don’t know about you.”

“I play the flute,” said Finn.

“No way!”

“I’m not very good. Uh—I was raised by dogs,” said Finn. “I don’t remember much about it—I was really young when the Princess brought me to the castle.”

“Joshua and Margaret.”

“What?”

“Your parents. The dogs. Their names were Joshua and Margaret.”

“What?”

“I hear a lot about you, man.”

Joshua and Margaret. “Do you know anything about them?”

“Not very much. All second hand,” said Marceline. “Bonnie wasn’t very impressed with them.”

“She’s not impressed with anyone.”

Marceline laughed. “Yeah. One of the reasons it didn’t work out.”

“She didn’t like your music?”

“Oh, no, she loved my music,” said Marceline. “It was everything else she didn’t like.”

Finn tried to imagine the Princess at a rock concert. He giggled.

“What,” said Marceline. “You don’t believe me?”

“Not really,” said Finn. The Princess at a rock concert. Cheering for her favorite rock band. Joshua and Margaret. “Thanks, Marcy.”

“Don’t you dare fall asleep on me,” said Marceline.

“Finn has a secret,” sang Goliad. He blinked awake. He was in his own bed. He hadn’t fallen asleep in the dungeons. “Finn has a secret.” She was standing over him, staring into his face.

“Goliad?”

“Guess what, Finn,” said Goliad.

“What.”

“Mother needed my help with an interrogation yesterday.”

“Oh,” said Finn. “I don’t like those.”

“She unsewed my eye for the interrogation, Finn.”

He felt dread curl in his stomach.

“Yes, Finn. And do you know what I did when my eye was unsewn? I took a look around.”

“No.”

“Yes, Finn. You’re terrified of my mother. You’re sympathizing with prisoners. You’re talking to one of them. Planning something. Worrying about her. It’s all you can think about, Finn.”

“I’m not planning anything!” said Finn. Goliad blinked innocently. “I’m not—I just. I need someone to talk to sometimes.”

“You need someone to talk to.”

“Yeah,” said Finn.

“So you decided to sneak off to the dungeon to make friends.”

“Yeah,” said Finn.

Goliad blinked. “The sad thing is I sort of believe you.”

“Goliad, please. You can’t tell—”

“I haven’t told mother anything,” said Goliad.

“Thank glob.”

“Yet.”

“Goliad,” said Finn. “Listen.”

“She’ll figure it out, you know,” said Goliad. “Her perfect Candy Knight. A traitor.”

“I’m not a traitor!”

“Hush,” said Goliad. “Someone will hear you.”

“Goliad,” said Finn. “What do you want?”

“I want—” Her tail lashed. “Shut up, Finn!”

Goliad bounded off. Finn turned over, closed his eyes, and tried to pretend to be going back to sleep. He heard his window shatter.

“I think I’m making a mistake,” said Finn.

“Yeah,” said Marceline. “Probably.”

“It’s about uh—I think #14-10-4,” said Finn. “The guy we brought in.”

“Yes?” said Princess Bubblegum. “You did an excellent job. I’m aware Goliad ditched you. I’ve spoken to her about that.”

“Not that,” said Finn. “I don’t think he should be in jail.”

She looked up from her book, startled, and turned to face him. Finn took a step back. “Why is that, Finn?”

“I—he’s not a bad guy,” said Finn. “He just got scared. His friend was suddenly gone and he freaked out.”

“His friend wasn’t gone,” said the Princess. “She was replaced. It was still her, just a new version.”

“But—” No, he thought. No, that doesn’t make sense. She was gone. You killed her. “I know that,” said Finn. “But he didn’t. He thought—I’m sorry, Princess. You asked me to tell you if something was bothering me.”

“I did,” said Princess Bubblegum. “And I’m glad you did. But, Finn—I know you’re getting older. And I know that means asking more questions. But I’ve been a little worried about this. I’ve never had any doubts about your loyalty, but—” “No!” said Finn. “No, I promise. I’m not a traitor.”

“You’ve been questioning me lately,” said the Princess. “You know I have to make difficult decisions.You should be grateful that you don’t have to.”

“But #14-10-4—”

“Is dead, Finn,” said the Princess gently. “I didn’t mean to kill him. I had tests I needed to run, and he was a prisoner. He redeemed himself to the Kingdom in the end.”

“You shouldn’t have killed him,” said Finn. It all made sense. She shouldn’t have killed him. “You shouldn’t have killed him,” he said again, and it was still obviously true.

“Finn,” said Princess Bubblegum. Her voice had gone cold. “We’ll talk about this later.”

“No,” he said.

Chapter Text

The door opened. Marceline scrambled back. “Marcy?” said Finn’s voice. No. No. Of course he would do something stupid. “Marcy, we’re—” He stepped into her cell. “Glob, what did she do to you?”

It was kind of nice how horrified he was. You got a little too used to these things sometimes. Two tubes were embedded into her bite marks through her blinking collar and three more were jammed straight into her arm. They tangled across her cell floor and plugged into the wall. There was more Finn couldn’t see, something metal jutting against her ribs from the inside, a display screen sewn into her thigh, wires down her throat and in her ear.

“Can I take those out?” he said. “Would you die?”

“What are you doing?” hissed Marceline. “Finn!”

“Rescuing you,” he said. “I think.”

“Can I convince you not to?”

“No.” He blinked. “I mean I guess if you need the tubes to not die we’d have to figure out something else. But I’m not leaving you here.”

“The top one on my arm is feeding me a drip of Red 40,” she said. “I’ll be fine without it for a bit.”

“Dude,” said Finn. “I am fully prepared to offer you my blood.”

“Nah, I’m good. Uh—the ones on my neck cycle this weird black vampire goop. One is in, one is out. Last time Bonnie blocked the in one I think I started dying or something. I think the other two on my arm are just straight up drugs.”

“Cool. Cool.” He took her remote out of his pocket. “Do you know how to work this?”

“Finn!” said Marceline. “How did you get that?”

“Stole it.”

“Shit, dude,” said Marceline. “Maybe we both won’t die. Let me see that. I think—” she pressed a button. The metal thing beneath her ribs jolted her. “Ow! Not that one.”

Finn looked confused and frightened. “Are we just gonna push random buttons and hope none of them kill you?”

“No, man,” said Marceline. “I’ve seen her use this. Give me a minute.”

“I don’t think we have a minute,” said Finn. “Ok. The arm ones I can just take out, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Great.” He stabbed his rapier into the first tube, which started dripping red.

“Red 40, remember,” she said. “Not blood.”

“Yeah.” Finn twisted his sword and yanked. It shuddered and jerked out of her arm. “Ow,” she said. “Ok. That is blood, but it’s fine.” Ugly purple bruising bloomed from the slowly dripping needle hole in her arm.

She studied the remote. Finn yanked out the second tube, but the third one tore, its metal face still embedded in her skin as the clear fluid pooled on the floor.

“Good enough,” she said. “Thanks, man.” Her arm was starting to hurt really bad. “I’ve got like a few hours before withdrawal hits. And then if we can survive that I’ll be good. Maybe—” Marceline pressed another button that she was pretty sure was right. “Ok. That’s the out tube closed. I need a few minutes to—”

An alarm started blaring.

“Cut them both now. Don’t try to take them out.”

He did. Marceline slumped to the floor.

“Marceline?”

“Do you have a plan to get out of here?”

“I was hoping your vampire powers—”

“Dude,” she said. “I am so jacked up on Bonnie’s gnarly drug cocktail.”

“Ok,” he said, and pulled her to her feet. “New plan.” She stumbled out of the cell, leaning on him. He drew his sword.

Three rattleballs were blocking the hall. She turned to the secret tunnel. Two more. Finn had taken his best approximation of a fighting stance with a vampire slumped on his shoulder.

Even if they made it past this patrol, there would be another one. They would never make it out of the castle.

“Help!” said Marceline. “I’m dying!”

“What,” said the lead rattleball.

“I’m dying! Please!” She coughed. She tried to tell herself she was acting.

“You have to take her to the Princess,” said Finn. He had figured it out. Ok. The kid was smarter than he looked.

“Receiving a communication.” The lead rattleball pressed a robot hand to where his ear would be. “Stand down,” he said, disbelief leaking into his robot voice. “As for you, Candy Knight—”

Her vision blacked out.

They were dancing. Bonnibel was wearing a sleek black tux, hair pinned back in a french twist. She wasn’t wearing her crown. Her hand was pressed to the small of Marceline’s back, holding her close.

“This would be easier with your help,” said Bonnie. They whirled to a familiar jaunty piano tune that Marceline couldn’t place. Bonnie twirled her.

For if the bomb that drops on you
Gets your friends and neighbors too,

Marceline was wearing a silk black cocktail dress that flared when she twirled and long lace gloves. The dress was backless, with black ribbon straps crossed at her shoulder blades.

There'll be nobody left behind to grieve!

And we will all go together when we go
What a comforting fact that is to know
Universal bereavement -
An inspiring achievement!

“Simon!” That was his voice. She twisted frantically to scan the ballroom. She stepped in time to the music. She couldn’t find the piano. She couldn’t find Simon. She couldn’t figure out where the music was coming from.

“Look at me, Marceline,” said Bonnie calmly.

She did. “Let go of me,” said Marceline. “Please.”

“You promised me a dance,” said Bonnibel.

“Stop—” She tried to twist out of Bonnibel’s grip. She couldn’t. The sun was rising in the high ballroom windows, orange light creeping across the wall.

No one will have the endurance
To collect on his insurance,

“Please,” said Marceline. “I won’t be able to find him if the song ends.”

Lloyd's of London will be loaded when they go!

Bonnie smiled softly. The sun was rising higher, breaking through the dark trees against the window.

Just sing out a Te Deum
When you see that ICBM
And the party will be "come as you are."

Oh we will all burn together when we burn.
There'll be no need to stand and wait your turn.
When it's time for the fallout,

“Let me GO!” Marceline wrenched herself backwards. She tore herself out of Bonnie’s grip. The tubes pulled taut, and she stumbled. They erupted from Bonnibel’s skin and then jammed into Marceline’s, ugly and pulsing and venomous. An exact mirror—from Bonnie’s neck to her own, from Bonnie’s arm to hers.

Bonnie examined her own arm dispassionately, and then looked up at Marceline with her infuriating little smile.

When the air becomes uraneous
We will all go simultaneous—

“I’m sorry, Marceline,” said Bonnibel.

Yes, we all will go together

The rising sun hit her.

When we all go together—

Everything went white. Her skin boiled. She hit the ground hard. She could hear herself screaming.

And then Bonnie turned the sun off.

Marceline lay on the floor breathing hard. She was wearing a grey tank top and sweats. She was on the cold floor of the castle, staring up at rows and rows of light bulbs, still faintly glowing.

“I don’t want to do that again,” said Bonnie, sounding shaken.

She looked up at her. The crown was back, and the bright pink flickering screen over her eye.

“Oh, Marceline,” said Bonnibel. “What happened to you?”

“The Candy Knight broke into her cell,” said a rattleball. The other two were holding her up by the arms, roughly, her legs dragging on the grass.

“Let me see her,” said Bonnibel. Marceline opened her eyes. They had taken her from the dungeon. They were standing in a courtyard in the castle. There was a crescent moon. The Princess’s hoverbike was parked behind her. “I need to get her to my lab.” Good. Perfect. “I’ll deal with Finn later,” said Bonnie. Marceline almost smiled. “I’m not going to let you die.”

Bonnibel touched her hair.

“Do you have the remote?” asked Bonnie.

“Princess?” said the lead rattleball. “It’s the Candy Knight. He—”

The grip on her arms fell away, one after the other, with a smooth metallic snap. The lead rattleball jumped in front of Bonnie, rapier drawn. Marceline scrambled to her feet.

Finn lunged. The rattleball parried. The kid was good with a sword. Marceline had known that. Bonnie had told her. But it was different seeing it in person. He was smooth and fast and precise, effortlessly matching a robot built for combat.

He stabbed it straight through the chassis and flung it aside. The thing shuddered and sparked, pulling itself to its feet, and Finn lunged at Bonnibel.

She flinched.

He froze. The sword was an inch from her face.

“C’mon man!” said Marceline. She grabbed Finn by the sleeve and pulled him onto Bonnie’s bike. His eyes had gone blank.

“I can’t—”

“I know!”

He grabbed her by the waist while she put it into gear and pulled the throttle. The engines hummed and lit up blue. “Full disclosure, man,” said Marceline, as they rocketed over the wall. “I might pass out like. At any moment.”

“I can’t drive,” said Finn.

“Great!” Her head had gone light. She pulled a sharp turn onto another street. “How do we get out of here?”

“Keep going,” said Finn.

“Got it.”

It had been hundreds of years. She had known that too. Enough time for the city at the heart of an empire to grow into a thriving metropolis. Enough time to build towers and trains and narrow city streets, with bridges and hovercars criss-crossing the towers above them. The city shone in the dark. It breathed.

“Woah,” said Marceline. “She did it.”

“Turn right,” said Finn. She banked right. “There’s a drone on our tail.”

She slammed the brakes. The drone didn’t stop in time. It sailed over their heads. Finn sliced it cleanly in half.

“Left,” said Finn. “And down. Through the train tunnel.”

“The—I see it.” She turned sharply, sending another drone careening into a wall. She swan dove down into the tunnel. “We have got to ditch this bike.”

“I know!” said Finn. “Up!”

She saw the lights behind them and nearly slammed them into the ceiling. “Finn!” she said. “Does this train take us where we need to go?”

It raced underneath them.

“I think so,” said Finn. “It’s outbound.”

“Jump!”

The death grip on her waist slipped away. “Marceline!” he shouted. She jumped and stumbled. She landed hard. The bike slammed into the wall and crumpled.

“Are you ok?” asked Finn. “The trackers—The tunnels mess with the signal. The older ones, at least.”

“Yeah.” She clung to the top of the train. Her heart was racing. Something that almost felt like pain kept trying to get her attention. The tunnel split. She felt dizzy with relief. “They won’t know where we’ll get out.”

“We’re on our way to the rail yard,” said Finn. “We board a freight train. Get out of the city.”

“Ok,” said Marceline. “Also I kind of need you to stab me.”

“What!”

“There’s a tracker beneath my ribs. Also a shock collar thing. You need to take it out.”

“I can’t stab you!”

“I’ll be fine.”

“No you won’t! You can’t even stand up!”

There was a rush of bright cold city night air. The light blinded her. Finn shrank back from the edge. The train hurtled down an elevated track to the railyard, rows and rows of tracks framed on three sides by towers, and on one—there was a wall. There was a wide gate. Beyond it were mountains and the sky.

“Wait,” said Marceline. “We’re not being swarmed.”

“The bike,” said Finn. “They found the bike.”

“She’s looking for bodies in the tunnel,” said Marceline. She laughed. “No signal.” The train started to slow. “Which one’s our ride?”

“We don’t have much time.”

“Yeah, obviously,” said Marceline. “Which one’s leaving?”

Finn scanned the yard. “That one. Freight train. Engineer just boarded.”

He caught her as she stumbled down from the roof of the train, and half-carried her across the yard. He pulled her up into the train, and closed the door. It was dark. Finn lit a lantern from his backpack. The train car was packed with boxes of sifted cotton candy, glowing softly in the orange glow where it peaked out from under the lids.

“Finn, you need to stab me,” said Marceline. “I’ve got vampire healing powers.”

“You don’t have any vampire powers right now,” said Finn. “I’m not gonna stab you.”

Her heart rate settled, and her arm started to ache again. It was still bleeding. The bruising had gotten worse. She was so, so tired. Her neck hurt. The tattered tubes still hung off of her skin. There were wires down her throat.

The train started to move.

“I couldn’t kill her,” said Finn.

“No,” said Marceline. Her eyes closed. “She couldn’t kill us either.”

“Marcy—” said Finn.

“Sorry, man,” said Marceline. “I need a moment.”

“That’s cool,” said Finn. “You should get some rest.”

“Alright,” said Marceline. It hurt less if she let herself drift off. “Stab me when I wake up, I guess.”

She woke up in a bed she didn’t recognize, under soft pink sheets and a heavy down blanket. She blinked. Her head hurt.

“Good morning, Marceline,” said a sweet, faintly amused voice.

Right. The cute pink girl from the concert. She had gone home with the cute pink girl—Bonnie? Almost definitely Bonnie. Marceline turned over.

Bonnie was sitting cross-legged in bed, staring at her with a faint smile. “ I’d offer you coffee,” she said.

“Shit,” said Marceline, blinking sleep from her eyes. “Last night was crazy.”

Bonnie laughed. She had an unfairly cute laugh.

“Didnt know you could do all that without—you know. Bits.”

Bonnie laughed again. Marceline wanted to make her keep doing that.

“I don’t have a lot of experience,” said Bonnie. “Just—“

“No,” said Marceline. “No, you did good. That was. Good. Yeah. Hang on—could you pass me that mug?”

“It’s empty.”

“Yeah, I—yeah. It’s the red. From the mug.”

Bonnie passed it to her. Marceline drained it. “Thanks.” Bonnie’s head had tilted to the side quizzically. She still hadn’t blinked.

“Bonnie,” said Marceline. “Has anyone told you how damn cute you are?”

Bonnie blushed. “Yes, actually,” she said. “Many people. All the time.”

“Not surprising.” Marceline sat up and looked around. The room was nice. She hadn’t noticed how nice it was the night before. It had been dark, and she had been drunk, and more than a little distracted.

“Wait, Bonnie,” said Marceline. “You’re rich!”

Bonnie laughed. “Yeah,” she said.

“Is that a crown? Bonnie, is that your crown?”

“Yes,” said Bonnie.

“If that’s even your real name,” said Marceline. “Shit, dude. I was so out of it.”

“It is!” said Bonnie. “Kind of. My name is Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum. I thought I had told you but I guess I forgot.”

“Princess, huh?” Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum. There had been windows a moment ago, hadn’t there? Windows with the shades drawn to protect her from the morning sun. That had been considerate of her. The walls were closer than they were supposed to be.

“Marceline Abadeer,” she said, unsettled.

“Marceline,” said Bonnibel Bubblegum, a nasty note in her voice. Marceline’s bite marks stung.

“Bonnie, what’s going on?”

“Im sorry, Marceline.”

“Bonnie!”

The room was gone. She was falling. She woke up with a jolt.

She felt the train rumble beneath her. “Finn?” she said.

“I’m here.”

“Cool,” she said. “Do you know what happened to Simon?”

“Who?“

“My friend. Simon. He was playing the piano, but I couldn’t find him.”

“Marcy, are you ok?”

“I need to find him,” she said. “He’s in trouble.”

“Ok!” said Finn. “Ok. We will. I promise. But you need to rest, Marcy. We’ll find him when you’re doing better.”

“Ok,” she said. “Ok. Thanks, Finn.”

“Glob, Marceline,” said Bonnibel. “I didn’t do anything. He was like that when I got him.”

Marceline stared at her. She wanted to tear Bonnie to shreds. She wanted to make her listen.

“You can’t use him like that!”

“He’s a powerful ice wizard who’s in love with me, Marceline,” said Bonnibel. “What do you expect me to do?”

“Stay away from my family,” said Marceline. She sounded so helpless. “I don’t care what you do to those things you made.”

“My citizens,” corrected Bonnibel sharply.

“Whatever. I don’t care. Just don’t hurt Simon.”

Bonnibel gave her an ugly little smile. “Or what?”

“Im crazy tired, Marceline,” said Bonnie, leaning against the heavy iron door from the other side. “I think I have been for a long time.”

Marceline opened her eyes. Her whole body hurt. Finn was watching her, hugging his knees to his chest.

“Hey, man,” she said.

“Hey.”

“Where are we going?” she asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Cool.”

“My parents are dead,” said Finn. “Not, like. Murdered. Just that dogs don’t live super long. I looked them up before we left.”

Marceline nodded.

“They had two—I mean, I guess I have two brothers. But I don’t know how to find them.”

She nodded.

“I don’t know what to do.”

Marceline closed her eyes. “Is there anywhere on the continent she doesn’t own?”

“No,” said Finn. “Not really. The flame county was in revolt a couple of years ago, but the Count surrendered. It’s not—things aren’t great there right now. It’s complicated, kind of, with the wizards—they’re not really part of the Candy Kingdom; they’re supposed to be independent, but they’re ruled by Peppermint Butler, who—”

“Yeah,” said Marceline. “I know what Peppermint Butler’s like.”

“Yeah.”

“Do we just keep running forever?”

“I’m sorry,” said Finn, and her whole body tensed.

“No,” she said. “No sorries. This was already so worth it, dude.”

Finn smiled.

“I got to see the sky, man!” she said. “I got to ride a hoverbike. Stretch my legs. Meet like—another person.”

“Everything else belongs to the Candy Kingdom,” said Finn. “Marcy,” he said. “I hurt a lot of people while I was working for her. I wanted to make up for it.”

Marceline sighed. “Not how it works, kid.”

“No,” said Finn. “I guess not.” He thought for a moment. “Do you think I need to die, then? To make up for it?”

“No,” said Marceline. “No. I just mean—you don’t get to erase bad things by doing good things, you know? You just gotta keep moving.”

“I could have killed her,” said Finn. “But I froze.”

“No,” said Marceline. “No, man. You’re like twelve.”

“I’m fifteen.”

“Whatever. It's not fair to expect you to kill your mom.”

“She’s not my mom,” said Finn. “She’s like—she’s Goliad’s mom. She’s my Princess.”

“Sure,” said Marceline. “Not really the point.”

“I don’t want to hurt her,” said Finn. “That’s bad, I think. I still care about her.”

Marceline closed her eyes. “Nah,” she said. She touched the tattered rubbery tubes hanging from her neck, filled with steel wires. Her skin had started to grow over the screws where they had been implanted. “Bonnibel is—she’s easy to care about.”

“But she lied to me!” said Finn. “She tortured you!”

“She’s not lying,” said Marceline. “Not really. Not about the big stuff. All that junk about protecting the continent—she really believes that.”

“But—”

“Yeah, man,” said Marceline. “I know.” She tried to force a grin. “Besides,” she said. “I don’t think you can kill Bonnie by stabbing anyways.”

“Since she’s made of gum,” said Finn.

“Yeah,” said Marceline. “Since she’s made of gum.”

“Thanks, Marcy,” said Finn. “That kind of helps.”

“It’s getting colder in here,” said Marceline.

“We’re going through the mountains, I think,” said Finn. “Hang on.” He stood up, and cracked open the door of the train car. There was a gust of cold wind. “Marcy?” said Finn. “Now would be a really good time for your vampire powers to come back.

“What’s up.”

“Goliad.”

“Shit,” said Marceline. “Is her eye—”

“Open.”

Something landed on the top of their train car with a thud. Finn scrambled backwards and slammed the door closed.

The latch opened again, moving on its own, and the door creaked up.

“Hello, Finn,” said Goliad, head peaking down over the edge of the train car. “Mother said that I need to give you a chance to come home willingly.”

“She doesn’t trust Goliad,” said Marceline. “She’s here somewhere, cloaked.”

Goliad glared at her. “Clock is ticking, Finn,” she said. “Chance revoked in five, four—”

Finn flicked his sword across her eye.

Goliad reared back with a startled cry. The door slammed closed. Marceline pulled herself to her feet.

“Marcy?” said Finn, floating in the air like a marionette.

“Hang on,” she said. A familiar jaunty piano tune was echoing in her mind. “I got you.”

Goliad launched him like a rag doll towards the train car wall. Marceline caught him.

“I hate you!” screamed Goliad. “This is your fault!”

Marceline was floating. She was holding Finn tightly a foot in the air above the train car floor. Goliad tried to yank him away from her again.

“Finn,” she said. “Do you have anything red?”

He handed her his sword with a candy cane hilt. “Perfect.” She drained the red stripe and handed it back to him.

The train door slammed open. Marceline shot out into the cold night air.

“FINN!” shouted Goliad. She leapt from the train roof and caught his boot in her teeth. It tore off of his foot.

It was a cold winter night. The moon was high in the sky. Beneath the mountains stretched what had been the grasslands—all farmland now and cotton candy trees, dotted with lights. The train sped over a narrow bridge through the mountains towards the horizon.

Goliad stood on a rocky outcropping by the tracks, furiously glaring up at them. “Mother wants you alive,” she spat. “But she didn’t say anything about missing pieces.”

“Why don’t we ask her?” shouted Marceline. “Bonnibel!”

The mountain was silent. Her voice echoed.

“Talk to me, Bonnie!”

The Morrow shimmered into view. It was standing on the side of the mountain with Bonnie on its back. “Marceline,” said Bonnibel coldly. Goliad blinked, startled.

“Princess?” said Finn. He sounded really young. The Morrow leapt from the mountain and flapped towards them.

“I’m sorry you had to be involved with this, Finn,” said Bonnibel. “Let go of him, Marcy.”

“No.”

The Morrow turned, circling them slowly. Marceline spun to keep an eye on it.

“Marceline,” said Bonnie. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

Marceline laughed. “That doesn’t matter, Bon-bon.”

“I do love you.”

“I knowthat,” said Marceline.

“You love Goliad,” said Finn. “And you still sewed her eye shut.”

“This isn’t about you, Finn,” said Bonnie. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Yes I do! Marcy! Hold me up higher.” She did, lifting him by the armpits to face Bonnie. She saw Bonnie almost smile. “You love Marcy, but you locked her in a dungeon forever.”

“Oh, we’re on ‘Marcy’ terms with her now?”

“She’s my friend!”

Bonnie smiled fondly.

“You love Goliad, but you sewed her eye shut. You love your kingdom—all you do is hurt people you love, Princess. And I don’t know why!”

“Oh, Finn,” said Bonnibel. “I’ve always wanted what’s best for you.”

Marceline, said Goliad’s voice in her mind. It burned with resentment. Marceline. I don’t want Mother to get him back.

I can cover for you. Buy you a minute or two. You can make up whatever story you want about what happened.

Will you kill my mother if we let him go?

The answer came immediately. Goliad was in her mind. She couldn’t have lied to her. No. No, she wouldn’t kill Bonnibel. Will you kill Finn?

The answer was just as clear. Drop him.

“I need you to stay alive, Finn,” said Marceline. “You got that?”

Finn twisted to look back at her. “What?”

Goliad, thought Marceline. Catch.

“You were right, Bonnie,” said Marceline. “He is a good kid.” She dropped Finn.

And she kissed Bonnie.

She lunged forward, knocking her off the bird. Goliad caught Finn, dropping him gently on the mountainside. Marceline kissed Bonnie, sweeping her into the air. The Morrow screeched and wheeled around.

“We’re over, by the way,” said Marceline, pulling back from the kiss.

“Yeah, yeah,” said Bonnibel. She felt achingly familiar in her arms. “Like it’s the first time you’ve broken up with me.”

“What time is it?”

“4:50,” said Bonnie

“I gotta get out of here,” said Marceline. “Goodbye, Bonnibel.”

The Morrow swooped down on them. Marceline dropped Bonnie into its talons and dodged out of the way.

Goliad sat on the side of the mountain, tail curled around her haunches. Finn had disappeared.The sky was very slowly starting to turn grey.

The world below her belonged to the Candy Kingdom. She could see signs of it everywhere, creeping and parasitic in its whimsical pastels. But it wasn’t the first time the world had been broken. And it wouldn’t be the last. She would find shelter before sunrise, and then—

And then.