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Eggsy was very content tucked into Merlin’s side. His head fit perfectly under Merlin’s chin and Merlin’s arm was just the right length to fit snugly against his side. The soft sweater the older man was wearing felt good against the skin on Eggsy’s face. The news quietly played in the background and they took turns petting the snoozing JB who was laying across both their laps.
“Merlin. Please come into the kitchen.” It wasn’t a request, but it was phrased as one. Eggsy looked up at Merlin and moved so he could stand. Merlin walked into the kitchen.
“What did you need, Harry?” That was when all hell broke loose.
“How many times have I told you to clean out your dishes and place them in the dishwasher after you use them?” Harry’s voice rang with utmost irritation.
“I’m sorry, Harry.” Merlin sighed, very uninterested. Eggsy sat up a little straighter and craned his neck to look further into the kitchen.
“I don’t want your apology! You're not fucking sorry, you never are. If you were sorry you would stop leaving your dirty mugs and bowls and plates in the sink for me to clean.” Harry’s voice was growing into a shout. “When are you going to realize that you aren’t the only one who lives in this house. You aren’t the only one who works and has shit to do.”
“Are you done yelling, Harry? Because I’m done listening.” Merlin said, obviously seething.
“Of course you are! You’re always done listening! In fact you never do it in the first place. I’d be better off yelling at a sack of potatoes in a sweater. It’d be just as useful and probably more effective.” Eggsy’s mouth went dry and he stood, taking a few steps closer to the kitchen.
“Well maybe I would listen if your comments had any meaning. Just a reminder, I don’t give a single flying fuck about most of the useless shit you say, but I have to put up with it and keep my mouth shut, because if I don’t you’ll just keep talking.” Eggsy peaked his head around the corner to get a good view of the argument. “Oh.” Harry crossed his arms.
“The things I say are useless, are they? Eggsy doesn't think so. Do you my darling?”
“Of course he does. Everybody does. Don’t you, lad?” Both men turned to Eggsy. His eyes widened and he gaped at the very intimidating men who were both trying to make him take their side.
“Uh…” He moved anxiously into the doorway to the kitchen and stared down at his feet. “I’m gonna go take JB for a walk. Be back in fifteen.” With that Eggsy left the room, got JB, and then fled the house as if his life depended on it.
Eggsy returned fifteen minutes later as he said he would. The house all three men shared was eerily quiet. He was very cautious entering in fear of re-sparking the argument from before.
“Dinner is on the table, Eggsy.” Eggsy nodded shakily and walked into the silent dining room. Harry and Merlin were staring at each other, both holding glasses of wine. Untouched plates of food sat in front of them, delicious smelling steam rose above them. Eggsy sat down at his usual place at the table and began to eat the food Harry prepared for them. After several minutes of silent staring Eggsy spoke up.
“JB saw a squirrel at the park today.” Eggsy laughed trying to hide his discomfort. Then he continued, trying to make the situation seem much more dramatic with large gestures. “He would have chased after him all the way to Manchester if I hadn’t’ve stopped him.”
Harry and Merlin had no reaction to Eggsy’s very cute anecdote. They just continued to stare and sip at their wine. Defeated, Eggsy stood, quietly thanked Harry for dinner, and left the table.
The blonde climbed halfway up the stairs before realizing that he had left his phone on the dining room table. With a sigh he turned and trudged back down the stairs. In that exact moment, four steps from the bottom of the stairwell, Eggsy saw his life flash before his eyes. His right leg buckled and his left leg slipped from under him. His head slammed back against a higher step, prompting a very sharp pain to erupt on the back of Eggsy’s head. Panicked footsteps neared the stairs and gentle hands helped him sit up.
“Are you okay, Lad?” Eggsy shook his head and winced.
“Head hurts.” Gentle fingers brushed against the back of his head making his grimace deepen.
“You’ll have a knot, but I think you’ll be fine after taking an Advil and icing it.” Harry reassured. “But, you would be fine if someone hadn’t left their shoes on the stairs.” Merlin opened his mouth to retaliate, but Eggsy cut him off with an irritated groan.
“Please stop fighting.” Eggsy stood and the other two followed. “It makes me sad to see you both so mad at each other. I can’t stand to see you both screaming at each other like that.” Eggsy looked at both Merlin and Harry with his sad puppy dog eyes. Both men looked at the boy sympathetically.
“We’re sorry, Lad. We never meant to upset you with our arguing.” Merlin placed a soft kiss to Eggsy’s temple and Harry did the same to the other.
Eggsy was very content smushed between Harry and Merlin. He loved the soft touches both were giving him as all three sat and watched a the latest Bond film.