Chapter Text
Skipping stones. It was one of the few ways to silence the voice in Reizho’s mind. He picked one of the smoother rocks on the lake’s shore, before cocking his arm and giving it a toss. He watched for as far as his vision would allow him, then reached for another stone. He was a young man of nineteen, and awaiting the birth of his firstborn. The whole thing weighed heavy on his mind. He didn’t have much choice in the matter, much less his wife. Reizho was about to skip what must’ve been his fortieth rock when he felt a gentle, almost hesitant tap on his shoulder. “They’re ready for you.” She spoke in a kind tone. Reizho could only muster a nod and a short “thank you”, before walking past Mary. Initially, he was in no rush. But the longer he was alone with his thoughts, the faster his pace got until he was in full sprint. He rushed past oleanders and yellow poppies, things he had quietly admired in passing, but never had the time or chance to truly relish in the beauty of.
It didn't take him very long to reach the village. Many were out of their houses, setting out clay pots for the oncoming rain. Reizho felt his chest heaving, slowing as he approached his own home. He urged his heart to calm itself as he walked through the open entrance. He was greeted with the sight of his older sister, mother, and wife. Clara held a red bundle of fabric in her arms, while his mother tended to Asana, whose health had been declining for the past few days. Reizho took a few steps towards Clara, his hand shaking as he pulled back some of the fabric to get a better look at his child. The boy had his dark hair but Asana’s face. Though it was a bit early to determine who he’d grow up to resemble the most.
It wouldn’t be for another two weeks before baby Ramón would be baptized. Reizho was indifferent to the practice while Asana was against it. But with no one to back her up on the decision, it went on. Reizho’s family had been helpful since Ramón’s birth, Clara and Mary helping with cooking and taking care of the baby while mamá Rocío was doing a little bit of everything. She had taken up the role as the family’s matriarch shortly after the death of her husband. She had an imposing presence, and a curt way of speaking that left others wondering what they could’ve done wrong this time while pardoning herself from those same expectations. She had been shunned by the church for years now, after the birth of Reizho and Yusei, the bastard children of her and a wealthy merchant from Japan. She has yet to see him since, and the whole ordeal was too much for her husband’s heart, as he passed shortly after the twins’ birth. Her power in the family’s dynamic gave her the control she had lacked her whole life.
Asana stood over the stove, after enough insisting she could, the relatives finally let her resume her life. Things were different now with Ramón, her precious baby bore the name of his late grandfather, who would’ve likely detested his existence. Her brow was furrowed as she wafted the garlicky scent coming from the pot.
Reizho came home earlier than usual that day. He kicked off his sandals as settle down on the floor beside Ramónito’s basket, feeling a lingering soreness from the day earlier. He was asleep, like every other time he saw him. He resisted the urge to poke or mess with the baby, knowing Asana would likely lose it. Her patience wore thin nowadays. Maybe it was from the baby, or the incessant nitpicks from Reizho’s family. Still, Reizho couldn’t help but be enamored with the small life in the basket, so fragile and pure. His eyes were closed now, but Reizho could still remember the feeling he had gotten when he first saw his son’s eyes. They were darker than dark, nothing like his or Asana’s. But he found them beautiful nonetheless. Ramón’s presence had slowly grown on him. He had never expected to find so much happiness in fatherhood, but his family didn’t share that same joy he did. Even Asana had become more withdrawn, her affection wasn’t evident whenever she was with him, and her eyes held an empty gaze whenever they were on him or their child.
Asana’s indifference to Ramón saddened him. And the loss of her personality. She was nothing like the woman he had married barely a year ago. Where was that glow and energy she exuded, that charm he had fallen in love with. Reizho wanted to hold onto the hope that she felt the same way about Ramón, for all their sakes.
“He’s beautiful, isn’t he?” Reizho asked, though it wasn’t in his nature to speak more than a few words, let alone initiate a conversation.
Asana simply nodded.
“We’re fortunate to have my family. I don’t know what we would’ve done without them.” Reizho murmured, still staring down at Ramón. Asana’s grip around the wooden spoon tightened at the comment. “I hope we get to raise him here," Reizho added. He could picture Ramónito, older, climbing trees with his cousins, and wading in lakes together, taking in the beauty of their home, and living life slowly. He wanted to protect his innocence. He wanted to see Ramón grow into something greater than themselves. Much to his disappointment, Asana didn’t give much of a response. She was indifferent towards his words, as if she couldn’t even hear him. Reizho sighed, looking back to Ramón.
“Do… Do you not love him?”
“I do.”
“Then why the silence? Why aren’t you happy?”
Asana was quiet for a while.
“I miss my family.”
She stopped stirring the pot, as she felt a resurgence of energy in her body. She once thought she would be trapped with Reizho, and his coarse relatives. Their noise had disoriented her, distracted her from the possibilities and choices she could make.
“I can’t stay here. I’m leaving, and I’m taking Rin with me.”
“Rin? Who’s-...”
Reizho’s eyes fell on Ramón. He didn’t like the new name Asana had picked for him. After all, Ramón was their child. They should have equal say in what his name would be. Though the more concerning part was Asana threatening to take his son from him.
“I’m not letting you do that.”
“...You have a year.”
Asana scooped a heaping serving of beans onto a plate, and placed it at the table, before exiting the house to attend to the laundry. Reizho’s eyes followed after her. He should’ve gone after her, but he knew her temper all too well. He patted Ramón on the head before going to eat whatever bastardized dish Asana cooked up today. Wouldn’t want the beans to get cold.
Reizho was losing sleep, contemplating over the ultimatum Asana had given him. It had only been a few months since, but time seemed to be passing faster and faster. Before he knows it, a year would have passed by, and Asana and the baby will be long gone. But if he went with them, he’d be leaving behind his family. The only home he had ever known. Then again, maybe going with Asana wouldn’t be so bad. Life in Xalapa was simple at best, and monotonous at worst. Nothing bad nor good ever happened. He knew little beyond his village but his curiosity grew ravenous.
He rose from his bed, glancing at Asana and Ramón before tiptoeing out of the house. He walked through the empty street, taking in the village as if for the last time. As he reached the end of the village the soft pattering of his foot steps returned to his usual heavy-footed steps. Reizho liked the smell of the forest after it rained, and the feel of the moist ground beneath his feat. He made his way back to the field of oleanders and poppies. Reizho laid down among the flowers looking up at the sky. His eyes were heavy with sleep, fluttering shut just moments after adjusting on the ground.