Work Text:
It had started out as a normal routine patrol, both of them roaming the streets of the city in their police cruiser, talking about their lives and having their typical playful squabbles. Judy was telling him that her mother had called and told her that one of her brothers was coming up to visit, to look at colleges and take in the city, and how excited she was to have him over. He told her about his mother’s latest venture in a cooking class and how she had quit after somehow managing to burn water. They laughed, they made witty quicks at each other, all was well.
And then the call came in over the radio.
“All units, come in. We have a 10-10, shooting at Hoof Ave, possible civilian casualties, do you copy?”
“10-4, Wilde and Hopps on the way.” Nick put the radio back in place and looked over at his partner. “Shooting, geez, it’s not even noon yet.”
“I don’t think mammals plan their murderous activities around time,” she quipped back, turning to head towards the location.
“But seriously, who just shoot someone in broad daylight?” he went on, reaching over to turn on the siren. “Like do you want to get away with it or not?”
“Because you know so much about that sort of thing.”
“Of course not. I was con man, fluff, not a murderer.”
This continued until they reached Hoof Ave, where they parked and quickly got out. Some of the other teams had gotten there already and were setting up a perimeter, winding the yellow police tape all around. The fox and the bunny ducked under as they headed towards the scene, bracing themselves for the worst. Murder was never a pretty sight.
To Nick’s surprise Bogo was there, standing with his hooves behind his back and his face grim. He heard them walking over, indicated by his ear twitching. He glanced over at them, his eyes darting down to Judy then over to Nick. “Wilde, Hopps, what are you doing here?”
“We got a call and we weren’t far away so we came as fast as we--…could.” Her words trailed off when she saw the victim, and Nick came up behind her to have a look.
It wasn’t pretty. The victim was a bunny, a teenager by the looks of him. There was one gunshot to the head, looking like it’d gone straight through. There was a lot of blood, he would have been dead before he hit the ground, the fox surmised.
“Poor guy,” Nick muttered under his breath, clasping his paws behind. “Just a kid—”
“Wilde, shut up.”
“Wha--!” The fox looked up at his chief, surprised to see panic in the buffalo’s eyes. “What did I--?”
“Shut. Up.” Bogo glanced down at Judy then back at Nick, his expression dead serious. And it made Nick’s heart pound.
“Sir?”
“No…”
He looked over at his partner and saw why the chief had been so insistent on his silence. Judy looked like she had just seen a ghost, her eyes wide and her ears hanging down her back. Her paws were clenched in front of herself and he could see them shaking. He blinked at her, his own eyes laying back on his head.
“Carrots…?”
“That—” She gulped and started to blink rapidly, a telltale sign that she was trying so hard to keep from crying. She took in a few more deep breaths, clearly trying to compose herself though it seemed it did little good as her entire being started to tremble.
Nick placed his paw on her shoulder, afraid she might fall over. “Carrots, what’s wrong?”
She looked over at him, a single tear escaping from one of her violet eyes. “That’s my brother…that’s Philip.” She gulped as her eyes looked at the dead rabbit again, her trembling worsening. “I don’t understand…he wasn’t supposed to be in until tonight, mom said he was going to call me when the train arrived.” She sniffled, trying so hard to keep her composure and it made Nick want to hug her but he didn’t dare. Not right now. Not when she was trying so hard…
“Judy…”
“I don’t understand, what is he doing here so early, why didn’t he call me to let me know he was here, why—?” Her shaking was starting to get worse and he feared she would fall over from it.
“Wilde.” Nick glanced up at his chief whose expression was so grim, a sadness and worry in his eyes that the fox wasn’t sure he’d ever seen before. “Get her out of here.”
“No, wait.” Judy reached out to grip Bogo’s pant leg in her paws, her eyes wide. “Who shot him? Do you know why? Please.”
The buffalo knelt down, placing both of his hooves on the bunny’s shoulders. Seeing them like that, it suddenly occurred to Nick just how small she was and it made a lump form in his throat. Her brother wasn’t too much bigger than her…how easy was it for animals like them to bleed out, to die?
Fear seized his heart.
“Hopps, go home,” the chief was saying to her, and Nick mentally shook himself so he could pay attention to what was happening. “Take care of yourself. Call your family. Your parents are already on their way here, we called them. Go meet them, take care of each other. We will take care of this.”
Judy shook her head so hard her ears flew. “No, I have to be a part of this, please, he’s my brother.” Her entire being was shaking now, only being held up by the chief. “Please…”
Nick reached out to take her from Bogo, wrapping an arm around her. “C’mon, Carrots, let me drive you home—”
“No!” She tore herself away from him, paws clenched and eyes glaring daggers at him. “That’s my brother, I’m not going to rest until I’ve arrested the mammal who shot him in cold blood! I can’t rest until he gets justice!”
“Carrots, listen to me.” Nick was the one to grip her shoulders this time, the realization of how small she was gripping him once more. “The best thing you can do for him right now is do what the chief said. Okay?”
She didn’t say anything this time so he took it as a sign of complacency. He gently guided her back to the cruiser, making her get in the passenger’s seat. There was no way in hell he was going to let her drive, not while she was like this.
Not while she was hurting so badly.
They went back to the station to grab her things and get in his car then drove towards the apartment they shared together. Nick kept stealing looks at her, to make sure she was okay. Of course he knew she wasn’t, but as long as she wasn’t about to break down he could relax just a bit. Just a bit…
They arrived at the apartment complex and he started to get out when he heard her sniffle. He froze, his eyes snapping back to her as he prepared himself for the worst. He had always been an only child, he’d never gotten to experience having siblings. He couldn’t imagine the pain she had to have been feeling right now.
“Why…” Judy sniffled, her bottom lip trapped between her teeth and he worried she would make it bleed. “Why did this have to happen…he was so excited to come see me, mom said he’d been talking about it for weeks…why…”
“Carrots…” He was a loss at what to say, what to do, how to help. “You don’t know the answer.”
“Then you tell me why.” Her gaze shifted to him, the pain and suffering in her eyes so apparent, so strong, it made his heart ache for her. “You tell me why this is happening, you always seem to have all the answers.” She was misdirecting her anger at him but that was okay, this was better than her sobbing. At least he told himself.
“I wish I knew,” he said honestly, his shoulders slumping in defeat.
All the fight left her at that point and she just hung her head and got out of the car, grabbing her bag and heading inside. Nick watched her go then decided to follow. The chief could chew him out later, he wasn’t about to leave her alone. Not right now.
The next few days were a blur to Nick, mostly full of dragging in suspects and demanding answers, demanding to know why the life of Philip Hopps had been taken so suddenly, so cruelly. There were a few times he had to be dragged out of the interrogation room because of how he wouldn’t stop shouting, how he had almost gotten violent with a few of them, the ones who scoffed at the idea of a fox being so sympathetic about a rabbit dying.
The whole station didn’t seem to understand why Nick was working so hard, why he was adamant to find the killer and bring him to justice. The chief had even tried to throw him off the case a few times but Nick fought with him about it for literally hours until Bogo gave up the idea. No one understood, no one got.
But none of them had to see the aftermath of Philip’s death.
None of them had to go home to a heart broken bunny. None of them had to see the light go out in her eyes when he told her there were still no leads. None of them had to be there to see her parents sobbing on her shoulders as she tried so hard to stay strong for them. None of them had to be there when they saw the body, had to see the bunnies struggle just to make funeral arrangements because accepting this death wasn’t something they wanted to do. None of them had to pretend not to hear Judy sobbing in her room at night, knowing her face was buried in her pillow because she didn’t want to wake him, because she didn’t want to be a burden to him, because she had no idea how badly he wished she would just come to him and let him hold her, let him comfort her.
The funeral was held in Bunnyburrow, with literally hundreds of bunnies in attendance. The ZPD attended just in case the killer decided to show up, which of course he didn’t. It was the most heart-breaking thing Nick had ever seen in his life, watching all these bunnies come together and mourn the loss of one of them. He could hear some of his fellow officers whispering, wondering why the loss of just one bunny was affecting the community so badly when there were hundreds of them. He had to clench his jaw to keep from shouting at that point.
Worst of all was watching Judy through it all, seeing her staring at her brother in the casket, violet eyes wide and glazed over with shock. It scared him. She was usually so emotional, made to cry so easily, that seeing her like this…it was like she was dead as well.
He had to scratch himself hard to yank his mind away from how terrifying that thought was.
After she came back home he prepared himself for her to break at any time, prepared to catch her when she fell and to help put her back together again.
Except she didn’t. She went about her days doing her normal routine. She was finally allowed back to work, though it was against the chief’s advice, and she went through her days like she always had. Except the same look stayed in her eyes, her ears never seemed able to stand up straight, her posture always just a bit slouched. Everything about her just seemed…defeated. Everything was different. Everything was just distinctly…not Judy Hopps.
One day she told him she was staying home to catch up on sleep and he said he would tell the chief. Bogo would be relieved that she was finally taking more time off, her performance had started to slack. Nick tried to check up on her through-out the day, but she never responded to any of his texts or his calls. He was starting to get worried.
“Wilde.”
Nick nearly jumped out of his skin as he whirled his chair around to face his chief. “Sir.”
“Go check on her.” Bogo’s expression was stern, leaving no room for argument. “You’re of no use to me like this.”
The fox felt relief wash over him and he nodded. “Yes, sir.” He rushed out of the building to his car then raced home, his heart pounding in his chest. He was scared, he realized. He tried to reason with himself. She was probably sleeping, maybe her phone was on silent, she just needed a day to herself. But nothing could make his heart stop beating so violently.
He parked in front of the building and hurried inside, taking the steps two at a time until he reached the door of their shared apartment. He knocked on the door. “Carrots? C’mon, I know you’re in there.” No answer. He unlocked the door and stepped in, looking around. “Hey, fluff, where are you? Don’t think I don’t know you’re ignoring me, you totally owe me lunch for this.”
Nothing.
He stepped in, begging his paws to please stop shaking. “I know you’re having fun playing hooky, but this is getting a little ridiculous. The chief even sent me home, apparently I’m no good without my partner.” He let a weak chuckle escape his lips as he walked towards the kitchen, sniffing the air. He could smell her, she was close, where was she? “Carrots? C’mon, this isn’t…funny…”
The sight before him made his heart stop and he knew it wasn’t something he was ever going to forget.
The bunny in question was sprawled out on the floor, her legs behind her slightly bent. Her arms were by her sides, her ears on her back. Her face was pressed against the floor, eyes closed, mouth slightly open. The only sign of life was her chest rising and falling, just barely, letting him know she was still breathing.
“Judy…!”
He dropped everything and rushed to her side, dropping to his knees beside her and gathering her up in his arms. She didn’t stir, not even a bit, completely out cold. He leaned down to press his ear to her chest, needing to heart her heart beat to reassure himself. He fumbled with his cell phone before dialing 911 and hitting call.
“Hello?? Yes, I need an ambulance right away, to the Rustic Jackle apartment complex. Please hurry, it’s Officer Hopps, she’s out, someone please help me…”
They didn’t let him ride in the ambulance with her which he threw a fit about but Nick was quick to follow behind in his car, never letting it get more than three feet away from him. When they arrived at the hospital he begged them to let him go with her but they insisted he wait in the waiting room. He paced back and forth, wringing his paws in front of himself, his mind whirling.
It didn’t help that he could hear the nurses whispering as they passed by.
“That’s Officer Wilde!”
“Did you hear? His partner is being worked on.”
“Isn’t she a bunny?”
“Did you hear that she lost her brother? Such a tragedy.”
“You know, I hear that bunnies have weak hearts.”
“They say that a bunny can die from heart break.”
“The poor thing…”
“I read somewhere that if bunnies get too stressed out they can have a heart attack and die.”
“Do you think that’s what happened to her?”
“Do you think she’s dead?”
“The poor thing…”
The doctor finally came out and Nick rushed up to her, asking her how Judy was doing, was she still breathing, did she have a heart attack, just please please tell him how she was doing, please let him see her, please.
The badger waited until Nick had calmed down to answer him. “She’s okay, she just fainted,” she explained calmly to him. “It looks like she’s exhausted and dehydrated, but we’re getting liquids in her right now. And she’s going to need a lot of rest.” She looked down at her clipboard, jotting some things down. “I understand there’s been a tragedy in her family life recently.”
Nick nodded, rubbing a paw over his muzzle. “Yes. Her brother was shot and killed not too long ago. We saw his body on the street…” Remembering all of this was painful for him and he had to clench his eyes shut for a moment.
The doctor nodded and jotted down the information before looking back at him. She gestured towards the chairs and they both had a seat. “Officer Wilde, I’m sure you already know that bunnies have weak hearts. If they’re frightened terribly or stress themselves out too much, they can have a heart attack and go into shock. Sometimes it can lead to them dying.” She must have seen the panic on his face because she went on quickly, “But like I said before, that’s not what happened to Judy. She just fainted, though it is very good that you called us. I think she’s still in shock from happened to her brother.” She tilted her head at him. “Has she had any counseling or therapy yet?”
“No.” He shook his head, running a paw over his face once more. “I know she should, but she keeps insisting she’s fine, and I know she’s not but no one can force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do.”
“I believe you.” She placed a paw on his shoulder. “But she’s not going to get any better if she doesn’t get some help. Tragedies like this take time and help to get over.” She stood up and smiled at him. “Would you like to see her now?”
He just nodded, standing up and following her down the hall. He could still hear all the whispers from the nurses, could feel their pitying stares on his back and he bit the inside of his cheek to keep from growling at them. He didn’t want their pity, he didn’t need their pity, he just needed his partner to be alright.
They arrived at her room and the doctor turned to him. “We’d like to keep her over-night for observation just to make sure her vitals are still steady, but you should be able to take her home tomorrow. See if you can’t convince her to go outside, though. It’s a lovely day.” She patted his shoulder before walking off.
Nick stared at the door for a moment before taking a deep breath and pushing it open, trying to prepare himself for what he was going to see.
Judy was sitting propped up in the hospital bed, an IV drip in her arm. She was just staring out the window, her ears hanging down her back and her eyes as vacant as they had been the last time he had seen her. It made his heart break a little just watching her, seeing how defeated she was. Was it because they hadn’t caught the killer yet? Was it because she thought she had to be the strong one? Or…was it really because her heart was getting weaker…?
“Hey, Carrots,” he started casually as he made his way over to her, stuffing his paws in his pants pockets. “You gave me a scare back there, ya know. I think you definitely owe me for that one.” There was no response, but he hadn’t really expected one. “The doc says you’re gonna be okay, you just need some rest. Which means more off time, I know you’re not gonna like that. I’ll have to keep you from trying to bribe me into bringing paperwork home.” Still nothing. Damn, he’d been hoping he would at least get a chuckle from that.
He stood by her bed, trying to think of what to say, trying to think of anything…but he couldn’t. She had scared him, really bad this time, and he was starting to get desperate. There had to be something he could do…
“See if you can’t convince her to go outside…it’s a lovely day.”
He glanced over at the wheelchair in the room and went over to grab it. He gently picked her up, which made her sputter a bit but she didn’t protest. That couldn’t be a good sign. He grabbed the IV and made quick work of attaching it to the wheelchair and started to push her out of the room. “The doc ordered some sunshine for you, fluff, don’t protest.” Nothing else was said as he pushed her out of the hospital towards the garden area.
It really was lovely outside, a perfect summer day in the uptown part of the city. He stopped in front of a fountain surrounded by flowers, knowing how much she loved this sort of sappy thing. He went to stand beside her, paws in his pockets again. Nothing was said for a few minutes as they just stood there, taking in the sound of the water and the scent of the flowers. But he knew he couldn’t let it stay this way. Nick took in a deep breath.
“Carrots…Judy. I—” He hesitated before continuing. “Look, I know it’s been hard for you since your brother died. And I’m sorry about that, I really am. If I could have stopped it…if I could take away even an ounce of your suffering I would. I would do anything to help you, god, I would.” He stopped, having to take a gulp of air before continuing. “If—if I could take his place…if it would make you smile, that would be enough for me.”
He took his paws out of his pockets, placing one on the arm of the wheel chair. “Look, I won’t pretend to know the challenges you’re facing. And I know there’s no replacing what you’ve lost and that you need to time.” He closed his eyes, trying to keep from crying himself. Even though all of this was about her and he knew she was suffering, it had all had a deep impact on him too, having to witness all this pain and being unable to do a damn thing about it.
“Judy…I’m afraid for you. I know bunnies have weak hearts, and while I know that you’re a fighter I can’t stand to just watch you grieve and not do anything about it. I’ve given you space and I’ve given you time. But…” His grip on the arm of the chair tightened. “I can’t lose you, Judy. I can’t lose you to whatever depression or agony that has taken over you…I just can’t. I…I want my partner back. I want the Judy back who believed that Zootopia is a place where you can be anything and that nothing should hold you back. I want my bunny back. So please…don’t leave me.”
Silence.
The fox sighed and opened his eyes, letting his paw fall from the chair. He stared at the fountain, dejection starting to take over his being. He let out a weak chuckle, his shoulders slumped.
“It’s quiet uptown…do you like it?”
There was nothing and he was ready to just give up and take her back in when he felt her soft paw slowly wrap around his. He froze before letting his gaze fall to his partner.
Judy was looking up at him, a weak smile on her lips and tears falling from her violet eyes. She sniffled and her paw around his tightened before she leaned over to rest her head against his arm. Then he heard her voice for what felt like the first time in forever, soft and sweet and very, very broken.
“Yeah…it’s quiet uptown.”
He instantly turned around to wrap his arms around her, feeling her go limp in his embrace as she finally, finally cried on his shoulder. She sobbed, hard and loud and heart-broken, her paws gripping the back of his shirt and her tiny body leaning into him, trusting him to take care of her, trusting him to help her hold some of her grief. And for the first time Nick knew that she was going to be okay.
After she was discharged from the hospital Judy started to see a therapist, and she seemed to be getting a little better after each session. They had prescribed her some anti-depressants and while Nick knew she hated taking them, they did help her out. She was able to return to work without any problems and they were doing even better work than before, if that was even possible.
They finally caught her brother’s killer about a month later, a schizophrenic drug-addicted porcupine who was immediately sentenced to the city asylum to be treated and never, ever let out. While he knew it didn’t help her family get over Philip’s death, it did seem to give the bunnies some closure over it and for that he was grateful.
The fox and the bunny were out on a walk a week after the sentencing, enjoying the weather once more when Judy suddenly said to him, “I’m sorry I scared you, and I’m sorry I never came to you for help. I’ve always had to be the strong one in my family, since I was one of the oldest and I just didn’t know how to tell you how I was feeling.”
It caught him a little off guard and he blinked down at her before letting his usual easy smile spread on his lips. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re better now, and that’s all I care about.”
“Still, thank you for looking out for me.” She gave him a soft smile. “I wouldn’t be here right now if it weren’t for you.”
He could feel his ears getting hot and he turned away from her, shrugging. “I’d do anything for you, Judy.”
There was a comfortable silence between them as they continued to walk, then Judy took Nick’s paw in hers, lacing their fingers together as she leaned her head on his shoulder, her ears standing up. “It’s quiet uptown.”
He smiled warmly down at her, not even trying to hide all the affection he felt for her. “Yeah. It is.”