Chapter Text
Thame stood outside the club, staring at the entrance with a cold, unreadable face. The neon lights glowed in red and blue. The loud music played. People laughed, shouted, and kissed.
He hated noise. He hated crowds. But tonight, something inside him was… tired. Work had been hell. His boss screamed at him for a mistake he didn’t make. His coworkers kept their distance, they always did. Cold, boring Thame. That’s what they whispered. No one knew him. No one tried.
He liked it that way. Or so he told himself. But tonight, the silence of his empty apartment felt heavier than usual.
He didn’t want to hear the ticking clock.
He didn’t want to look at his clean, perfect walls anymore.
He didn’t want to be alone, not tonight.
So he wore a black shirt, tucked it neatly into his jeans, combed his hair, and walked out into the city. He didn’t know where to go. His feet led him here.
The club.
He took a deep breath and stepped inside. Instantly, the air changed. Warm. Wild. Bodies moved to the beat. Lights flashed in every color. The smell of alcohol and perfume mixed in the air. Laughter. Moans. Screams. Kisses in the corner. Hands wandering under clothes.
Thame moved slowly to the bar. He didn’t look around. He didn’t smile. He just sat on a
stool and ordered, “Water. Cold.”
The bartender blinked at him. “Just water?”
Thame didn’t answer. He just stared. The bartender nodded awkwardly and poured the
drink. Thame took a sip and looked down. He didn’t belong here. This was a mistake.
But someone had already noticed him.
Across the room, in a dark red private booth, Jun sat with one leg crossed over the other, a drink in hand, shirt open too low, laughing with two
friends, Pepper and Nano. His sharp eyes scanned the crowd lazily, until they landed on Thame. And
stopped.
“Damn,” Jun said softly.
Nano leaned over, curious. “What?”
“That guy at the bar. Black shirt. Sitting all stiff like someone’s gonna punch him.”
“Oh,” Pepper said. “Office guy?”
“Cold guy,” Jun said, lips curling into a grin. “I wanna warm him up.”
Nano laughed. Jun didn’t wait. He stood up, finished his drink, and walked straight to the spot where Thame was sitting.
Confident. Bold. Like he owned the place. Thame didn’t look up. Jun leaned against the counter next to him. His voice was smooth, teasing.
“Hey, stranger. You look like you hate being here.”
Thame finally turned his head. Their eyes met.
Jun's smile widened. “Cute.”
Thame’s eyes narrowed slightly. “I’m not here to talk.”
“Mm, cold,” Jun whispered, clearly enjoying this. “I like that.”
“I’m not here to play, either,” Thame added.
“Oh?” Jun leaned closer. “Then why are you here?”
Thame didn’t answer.
Jun smirked. “You don’t look like the club type. Stiff shoulders. Sharp eyes. Tidy shirt. You’re hiding something.”
Thame’s fingers tightened around his glass.
Jun kept going. “You look like a man who never touched a stranger. Never got touched.”
Thame’s face didn’t change, but inside, something burned.
“You want to forget something?” Jun whispered. “Or someone?”
Thame looked away.
“That’s it,” Jun said, watching him. “You want to forget. That’s why you're here.”
Thame stood up.
Jun raised an eyebrow. “Leaving already?”
Thame looked down at him, calm and unreadable. “What do you want from me?”
Jun smiled. “One night.”
There it was. So simple. So shameless.
Thame didn’t react. He looked at Jun’s face, then down to his open shirt, smooth skin glowing under the club lights.
Jun didn’t blink. “You’re thinking about it.”
“I don’t do this,” Thame said quietly.
Jun leaned in so close his breath touched Thame’s neck. “Maybe it’s time you start.”
Thame stayed still. The music slowed down. A sexy beat played. Bodies pressed together on the dance floor. Jun stepped back just a little and held out his hand. “Come. One dance.”
“I don’t dance.”
“I’ll guide you.”
Thame stared at the hand. He didn’t take it. Jun didn’t pull back. “Don’t think. Just do it.”
For a second, Thame didn’t move.
His mind screamed no. But his heart? It whispered yes.
Slowly, his hand reached out. Jun’s fingers curled around his. Warm. He led Thame to the dance floor.
Jun turned to face him and placed his hands on Thame’s waist. “Relax.”
Thame stood stiff.
Jun chuckled. “You’re like a statue. But a pretty one.”
“I told you, I don’t-”
“Shh,” Jun whispered, eyes locked on him.
“Let me move you.”
He guided Thame’s hips, slow, teasing, close. Their bodies brushed, not quite touching. Jun’s fingers slipped under the edge of Thame’s shirt, just a little. Thame shivered. He had never done this. Never been this close. Never let anyone in. But Jun’s body was warm, and the way he moved… it lit something inside him.
Jun leaned in, lips near his ear. “Do you feel that?”
Thame swallowed.
“That heat,” Jun whispered. “It’s real.”
Thame didn’t answer.
“You want more?”
Thame looked into his eyes. Yes. He did.
Jun’s smile was slow and dangerous. “Then come with me.”
“Where?”
“Somewhere quiet. Somewhere we can forget.”
Thame hesitated. His mind said no again. But his body… was tired of being cold. Tired of
silence. Tired of holding back.
Jun took his hand again. “Trust me.”
That was the hard part. But for some reason, tonight, it felt easier. They walked out of
the club, hand in hand.
They stepped into the alley behind the club, where the air was cooler. A single streetlight flickered overhead. Jun let go of Thame's hand and leaned against the brick wall, hands in his pockets, looking at Thame with amused eyes. “You always let strangers pull you out of buildings?”
Thame stood still, watching him. “What’s your name?”
Jun’s eyebrow rose. He smirked. “Took you long enough to ask. Jun.”
“Jun,” Thame repeated softly.
Jun tilted his head. “And you?”
Thame’s eyes flicked to him, sharp again. Cold. He didn’t answer. Jun waited. One second. Two.
“No?” he asked, tone half-teasing, half-curious.
Thame just looked away.
Jun laughed under his breath. “Mysterious, huh? I can work with that.”
He pushed off the wall and stepped closer again. “I’ll just call you Stranger. Or Stiff Shirt. Or maybe…Pretty Statue.”
Thame’s lips twitched. Not quite a smile. But close. Jun leaned in again, brushing his fingers along the edge of Thame’s collar. “You’re not used to being touched.”
Thame caught his wrist. Jun paused. Their eyes met, fire meeting ice.
“You talk too much,” Thame said.
Jun grinned. “And you don’t talk enough. That’s what makes us fun.”
After that Jun again intertwined his hand with Thame's. The walk from the club was quiet. Neither of them spoke. Thame’s mind was spinning. He didn’t know this boy. He didn’t even know where they were going. He’d never held
someone’s hand like this. Never walked through the night with a stranger by his side. It should’ve felt dangerous. Stupid. But Jun’s grip was firm, sure. Not pulling him, just holding.
Like he belonged there. They stopped in front of an apartment building. Not tall. Not fancy. But neat.
Jun turned to him with a soft grin. “Still with me?”
Thame nodded once. Jun led him inside and opened the door to his place. The room was warm, filled with soft golden lights. There were some clothes on a chair, two empty mugs on the table, and a big red couch with a soft blanket folded on top. Jun kicked his shoes off and dropped his keys in a bowl. He walked in like it was just another night. Thame stood near the door, hands still in his pockets. Jun turned around
and looked at him. Not playful now. Not flirty. Just… calm.
“Take off your shoes.”
Thame looked down. Slowly obeyed. Jun walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge. “You want a drink?”
“No.”
Jun poured himself some water and leaned against the counter. His eyes stayed on Thame. He was watching, waiting. Reading him.
“You can leave,” Jun said softly. “If you want. No pressure.”
Thame didn’t move.
Jun tilted his head. “Why are you here?”
Thame looked up. “I don’t know.”
Jun took a sip. “Wanna know why I invited you?”
Thame didn’t answer.
Jun stepped closer. “Because you looked like you needed to be touched.”
Thame flinched. Jun moved even closer. “Not in a dirty way. Not just sex. You looked like you were starving for warmth.”
Thame looked away. Jun reached out. Fingers brushed Thame’s cheek, light as air.
“When’s the last time someone held you?”
Thame didn’t speak.
Jun’s hand moved to his jaw, thumb pressing gently. “Kissed you?”
Thame’s breath hitched.
Jun leaned in, voice almost a whisper. “Do you want me to?”
Thame met his eyes. Jun saw it there. The want. So he leaned in. Soft lips brushed cold ones. No force. No rush. Thame’s body stiffened. But he didn’t pull away. Jun kissed him again, slower. This time, Thame closed his eyes.
Jun’s hand moved to the back of Thame’s neck, fingers sliding into his hair. The kiss deepened, slowly. Thame’s hands twitched at his sides. He didn’t know what to do. He had never done this before. But Jun’s kiss was patient. Melting. Then, Jun’s lips left his mouth and moved to his cheek, then his neck.Thame gasped softly. His head tilted back on instinct, and Jun smiled against his skin.
He kissed down the line of Thame’s throat, slow and deep, his lips warm and wet. Thame’s fingers finally moved, grabbing the side of Jun’s shirt like he needed something to hold onto.
“Jun…”
Jun froze for a second. His name in that voice, soft, unsure, made something inside him ache.
He pulled back just enough to look at him. “Say it again.”
“…Jun.”
Jun chuckled low. “You have no idea what your voice does to me.”
He took Thame’s hand and walked backward, pulling him toward the bedroom. The room was small, simple. A double bed, some books, a messy closet. The light was soft. Jun sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at Thame.
“Are you scared?”
Thame didn’t lie. “Yes.”
Jun reached out and placed a hand on Thame’s hip. “Me too. But I still want you.”
Thame’s breath shook. Jun pulled him closer, slowly, until Thame stood between his legs. He looked up, eyes dark and warm.
“I’ll stop if you tell me to.”
Thame said nothing. Jun kissed his stomach through the shirt, hands sliding under the hem. Fingers explored soft skin, careful, respectful.
“Can I take this off?” Jun whispered.
Thame nodded, slow. Jun undid each button with gentle fingers, eyes never leaving his. When the shirt fell open, he paused, just looking.
“You’re beautiful.”
Thame tensed. “Don’t say that.”
“Why not?” Jun stood and slid the shirt down Thame’s shoulders. “You are.”
Thame’s chest rose and fell too fast. “I’m not like the others.”
“I know.”
“I don’t know how to do this.”
“You don’t have to.” Jun placed a kiss over Thame’s heart. “Just feel.”
Their mouths met again. This time, it wasn’t soft. It was deep. Hungry. Thame’s hands finally moved with purpose, grabbing Jun’s waist, pulling him closer. Their bodies pressed tight. Thame kissed back harder, like he’d been starving for years and finally tasted life.
Jun gasped into his mouth. “That’s it…”
Hands roamed now. Jun’s fingers explored Thame’s chest, his back, his spine. Thame’s
fingers tangled in Jun’s soft hair. They kissed like they were trying to burn each other alive. Clothes fell off, piece by piece. Skin touched skin. And everything slowed down. Jun laid Thame down on the bed, soft sheets under his back. He climbed over him, eyes locked.
“Still okay?”
Thame’s voice shook. “Yes.”
Jun leaned down and kissed his lips. His cheek. His jaw. His throat. His chest. Every kiss was slow. Worshipping. Thame’s eyes fluttered closed. His body arched under Jun’s touch. He had never felt this kind of heat. This kind of closeness. Jun’s mouth explored his chest, teasing one nipple with slow licks, making Thame shivered. He grinned against the skin. “Sensitive?”
Thame covered his face with one hand. “Shut up…”
Jun chuckled. “You’re adorable when you blush.”
“I’m not blushing.”
“You are.”
Thame looked away. His body was burning but his face stayed cold, at least he tried. Jun moved lower, kisses trailing down his stomach, slow and dangerous. Thame’s breath turned shallow. Jun’s fingers caressed his hips. He looked up from between Thame’s thighs. “Still okay?”
Thame bit his lip. Nodded. Jun didn’t rush. He worshipped him, slow and intense, tasting every part, listening to every breath, every moan. Thame’s hands gripped the sheets, head thrown back, lips parted. He had never been touched like this. He had never let anyone touch him. But
tonight…
Tonight he was burning. When it became too much, Thame reached down, pulled Jun
up, their bodies crashing together.
“Want you…”
Jun kissed him hard. “I’m here.”
They moved in sync, like they’d done this forever. No words. Just heat. Sweat. Whispers. Fingers interlocked. Hips moving slow, then faster. Thame gasped. His body shook. His mind was gone. Jun kissed every sound out of him. They moved together. And then,they both fell. Breathless. Sweaty. Holding each other. For a long time, nothing was said. Their chests rose and fell in time. Their fingers tangled without thinking. Thame stared at the ceiling, heart pounding. His face was still unreadable, but his body… his body was warm. Relaxed. Touched.
Jun turned on his side and looked at him. “You okay?”
Thame nodded slowly. “I don’t know what just happened.”
Jun smiled and kissed his shoulder. “Something good.”
Silence filled the room. Then Thame whispered, “I’ve never done this before.”
“I know.”
“Why did you pick me?”
Jun smiled sleepily. “Because you looked like you forgot what it means to feel.”
“…and now?”
Jun rested his head on Thame’s chest. “Now you remember.”
Thame didn’t reply. But he didn’t move either.
Jun closed his eyes. “You can sleep here. No pressure.”
Thame stayed silent again. Then slowly, carefully, he placed an arm around Jun waist. Just once. Just for tonight.
The light in the room was soft and golden when Thame opened his eyes. For a second, he didn’t know where he was. Then he felt the warmth pressed against his side. The slow, peaceful rise and fall of someone breathing beside him. A bare arm across his waist. Soft black hair brushing his chest.Jun.Thame stared at the ceiling. His body still remembered everything that had happened.
Every kiss, every sound, every inch touched and tasted. He had let go fully. And now...
It scared him. He looked down. Jun’s face was peaceful. His lips slightly parted, still red. His body curled around Thame like he belonged there. Like they were more than strangers. Thame slowly lifted Jun’s arm from his waist. Sat up. Swung his legs off the bed. His clothes were still scattered on the floor. Shirt, pants, belt. He got dressed
quietly, each button trembling between his fingers.
He glanced back once, just once, at Jun, who still slept, one hand resting on the empty space Thame left behind. Then he walked out. He didn’t leave a note and didn't say goodbye. Didn’t let the door slam. He just left.
Outside, the morning air was cold.He reached his apartment and stepped inside the silence like stepping into a grave.Same white walls. Same spotless floors. Same ticking clock. It felt… smaller. Tighter. He took a quick shower. Hot water. But it didn’t feel hot enough. His skin still remembered Jun’s hands. His neck still remembered his lips. He scrubbed hard. Too hard. Like he could erase it.
Then he put on his work clothes, clean shirt, tie. Everything was perfectly ironed. Everything is perfectly empty. Like before. The office was grey. Cold. He walked in like a machine, as always. Nobody greeted him. Nobody noticed him. He liked that. Or he used to. He sat at his desk and opened his laptop. His calendar was full. Reports due. Meetings back-to-back. Numbers. Charts.
Graphs. All the usual. All familiar.
But he couldn’t think. Because every time he closed his eyes, he saw Jun’s face. The way his
eyes sparkled when he teased. The way his lips curved right before he kissed.
Thame shook his head and forced his eyes to the screen. He typed two lines of an email. Paused. His fingers curled. He stared at his hands.
These hands had touched Jun’s skin.
Had held him tight in the dark.
Had made someone else moan.
Had pulled hair.
Now they were typing numbers again. It felt wrong.
“Thame?”
He looked up. His manager stood by his desk. “That report for the client—did you send it yet?”
He blinked once. Twice.
“…Which client?”
She frowned. “ACCA Corp. Due this morning.”
“Oh.” He swallowed. “Right. I’m… working on it.”
She gave him a look. “Everything okay?”
“Yes.”
“Alright.”
She walked off, heels clicking. Thame turned back to the screen. He started the report. But the words blurred. His thoughts drifted back again. Last night. Jun’s hands on his hips, fingers gentle but firm. Jun’s lips sucking a bruise onto his collarbone, soft curses whispered against skin. The way Jun held him afterward, not possessive, not needy, just quiet… warm. He’d never been held like that before. He’d never let anyone hold him. And he left without saying a word.
Why?
Because he was scared.
Because that night felt too good.
Because it cracked something inside him, something he’d locked away for years.
Thame leaned back in his chair. Closed his eyes.
He didn’t even know Jun’s last name.
He had no idea what Jun did for work, what kind of music he liked, what his favorite food was.
Nothing.
But he knew how his lips tasted.
He knew how his voice dipped low when he was serious, how it changed when he whispered into Thame’s ear.
He knew how Jun kissed when he wanted to be gentle.
Thame bit his lip and opened his eyes again. He tried to focus. Forced himself to work. Hour after hour passed. He stayed quiet. Cold. Just like always. But he wasn’t okay. Lunch break came. Thame didn’t eat. He just sat outside the building, staring at the sky. Grey clouds. Heavy. No sun. It matched him. His phone buzzed. He didn’t check it. Probably work. It wasn’t Jun, he knew that. Jun didn’t ask for his number. Thame didn’t offer.
That night wasn’t meant to be more. It was just one night.
Right?
Then why did it feel like more?
He walked home late. The city felt colder than usual. His coat didn’t help. Everything around him looked normal, but nothing felt the same. He stopped in front of a shop window. Inside, a couple was laughing, sharing a bowl of soup, their legs tangled under the table. Thame looked away quickly. That wasn’t him. He didn’t want that. He didn’t need that. Except…
Jun’s hand had rested on his chest like it was the most natural thing. His fingers had brushed over Thame’s lips when he kissed him goodnight, whispering, “Sleep here. It’s okay.”
It felt okay.
And now?
Now it hurts.
Back in his apartment, Thame stood in the middle of the room. He didn’t turn the lights on. He just stood. The silence pressed into him. He pulled off his tie, shirt, and pants, one by one. Changed into a plain tshirt and soft pants. Made coffee. Didn’t drink it. He sat on the edge of his bed. Then slowly, he laid down.
The bed felt too big. He rolled to one side. It didn’t help. He grabbed a pillow, hugged it to his chest. Still didn’t help. He closed his eyes. His body remembered. The weight of Jun pressed on top of him. The way Jun kissed him. Thame turned on his side, curled up tighter. He hated this. He was supposed to forget.
That’s what one-night stands were for. But Jun didn’t leave his mind. Didn’t leave his body. Didn’t leave his chest. The next day, Thame tried again. Work. Routine. Emails. Meetings. Polite nods. But it wasn’t the same anymore. Jun had ruined him. Not in a bad way. Not really. He’d just… shown him something warm. Something that felt too real for a man who’d trained himself to feel nothing. And now Thame couldn’t go back. He was still cold on
the outside, still silent, still sharp.
But inside?
He was on fire and trembling in the heat. And no one could see it. No one but Jun.
Thame sat on his bed that night, laptop on his knees. He should be doing work. But he wasn’t. He was staring at a blank search bar. Fingers hovering. He wanted to search for Jun. But he didn’t even know how. Jun never gave him a last name. No workplace. No number. Just a name. A smile. A night. And a mark Thame couldn’t erase.
He closed the laptop. Pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes. He should forget. Move on. But he couldn’t. Because no matter how hard he tried…
He still felt Jun’s breath on his neck.
He still remembered how it felt to be seen.
To be touched not like an object, but like a man.
A man who deserved to be wanted.
And now, no amount of silence, no cold office, no hard work… could freeze that memory. Thame lay in bed that night. Eyes wide open. One thought echoing in his mind:
"I want to feel that again.”