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dylan felt like this, someone who was deeply lost. in love but swimming in denial rivers for a stronger sense of survival.
after spending more time alone with jun his urges to just forget about everything and leave all the fears and trauma behind were thriving. kissing his friend was all he’d think of all day and these thoughts were pure insanity, swallowing him entirely.
dylan wanted to love jun so badly, but his senses were telling to stop. the frightening thoughts of being left behind and risking it all ¬— and maybe ending up losing a friendship — was intoxicating his mind.
jun was a venomous poison running through dylan’s mind, body and soul. dylan didn’t have a clue about his feelings of longing before the day jun helped him dye his hair. the way their eyes met, fixing on each other so deeply, made him realize something from inside, the feeling of love that was buried 6 feet deep in his heart.
“how can i love someone like jun?” “what should i do? should i confess and maybe ruin our friendship?” “what would other members think of this? would it be too weird?”
he was sitting at the living room in mars’s dorm so lost in every thought possible of jun that he didn’t even realize the boy who was poisoning him sat right on his side, putting his arm around the couch and getting closer to dylan’s face.
“what are you daydreaming about cutie?” it was the way jun found out best to annoy his dear friend. dylan jumpscared a little as he wasn’t expecting jun to be there, so close... trying to annoy every part of him.
he didn’t dare answer jun like he would always do. his mind was so clogged that he forgot for a bit how their relationship was based on being annoyed and cold hearted.
dylan was dazed, he wasn’t supposed to stare at jun’s lips like that but he did for some seconds. seconds that seemed like hours.
“your lips.... so hot” he was caught in jun’s web and felt indeed like a prey ready to be dead by so much poison consuming his mind.
for some reason, the stare didn’t seem to end. instead, jun stared back and stayed like this for an instant.
dylan took a few moments to realize he lost his way... again. when he did come back to his senses, he turned his face back to neutral position, trying to shrink himself onto the sofa. he was about to get up and leave, but suddenly a warm hand caught his right cheek and turned his face back to jun’s gaze.
the heartbeat... the freaking heart beating faster than ever. he was so done, it must be another one of jun’s jokes to annoy him. there was no way he felt something for dylan.... right?
“jun i’m really not in the mood for jokes right now, just stop wh-“ he was shut up. he really got shut up by a kiss? by JUN’s kiss? he was so surprised that he had no reaction at all.
jun did just a tiny peck on his lips and then pulled back, only to press his forehead on the other boy.
with both eyes closed they stayed together for a moment, feeling each other’s breath closely.
“i’ve realized you feel the same, there’s no need to hide” said jun while caressing dylan’s cheeks with tender.