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Rai would occasionally wear such an expression. Like a lake veiled by a thin layer of ice—calm and unruffled on the surface, yet hiding turbulent undercurrents beneath, making it hard to see through clearly.
Some feelings are understood without words, but there are times when Konoe wishes Rai would speak a little more, be a little more open. Though for Rai, that might be asking too much.
Just as he was lost in these thoughts, Rai's weight pressed down against him. It felt like a silent warning in response to Konoe's searching gaze—a flicker of something Konoe couldn't quite decipher passed through those ice-blue eyes.
Warm breaths brushed rhythmically against the side of his neck.
—Don’t ask questions like that again.
It was as if he could hear Rai’s unspoken words.
When cool fingertips slipped beneath the hem of his clothes, they stirred a faint, instinctive tremor in his body. But Konoe’s thoughts still lingered on Rai’s earlier hesitation—until those hands began moving with a willful possessiveness over his skin, and Konoe found it impossible to focus.
Every place Rai touched burned like fire, small flames licking their way upward inch by inch. Soon, Konoe had no room left to think at all.
So hot.
Even his cheeks felt like they were burning up.
A soft whimper escaped his lips, sounding especially clear in the overly quiet room. The frantic beating of a heart—his, or maybe Rai’s—and the sound of his own intoxicated breathing.
Konoe didn’t like this—it felt as though he was the only one drowning in it, like a fool.
“Rai, wait…”
Konoe didn’t want to let him evade the subject like this, but Rai’s hand covered his mouth before he could say more.
“I won’t wait.”
Then Rai kissed him deeply, crushing all remaining questions between their lips and tongues.
After the intimacy, the air still carried a faint, ambiguous sweetness. Even after countless unions, this body could always produce reactions that felt both unfamiliar and shameful to him. Yet merely recalling the breathy moans that had escaped him earlier was enough to make him want to vanish on the spot. Rai, as expressionless as ever, was calmly smoothing down the disheveled fur on his back.
Damn it.
Konoe felt a surge of irritation.
The one responsible for all this wore a look of complete detachment, which only made him—who had so foolishly lost himself in pleasure—feel even more wretched.
He wanted to see it too—Rai losing that composure of his.
Noticing Konoe staring blankly at the corner of the bed, Rai suddenly spoke: "What are you thinking about now, baka neko?"
"Nothing!" Konoe, feeling exposed, buried his face in the pillow. "It's just..."
"What?" Rai's presence drew closer, his voice brushing against the nape of Konoe's neck. A tingling itch traveled down his spine to the tip of his tail, and Konoe curled up.
"Just what?" Rai asked again.
"...Anyway... you're already used to this kind of thing, right?"
That was what he had meant to ask, but Rai didn't answer. Instead, after flashing a complicated expression, he had sealed Konoe's lips with action—leading to that earlier, nearly uncontrollable wave of passion.
But now, after going in circles, the question had returned to its origin.
Konoe felt a wave of self-directed frustration.
Even if Rai had been with others before him, it was only natural. Konoe knew this—he understood it perfectly well. But still...
A soft sigh reached his ears, so light it was almost imperceptible.
Konoe, feeling reckless, decided to lay all his cards on the table. The words tumbled out in a disordered rush: "Anyway, anyway... but it's not like that, either."
Rai's hand suddenly gripped Konoe's shoulder, firmly pulling him out of the pillow without room for refusal. His brows were tightly furrowed, his lake-like eyes fixed intently on Konoe. "What are you trying to say?"
Konoe pushed against Rai's chest, but he didn't budge an inch.
Thoroughly irritated, Konoe snapped, "So! I'm not like you! I'm not used to things like this!"
Rai gazed at Konoe's flushed, nearly crimson face, and his frown suddenly eased. A hint of light laughter tinged his voice as he spoke again.
"Are you really that much of an idiot?"
"..."
"The one I've gotten used to... is you, isn't it?"
...As expected.
What he hated most was Rai's composure.
End.