Chapter Text
It hurts.
Under the cold embrace of the rain and soil, that thought pierced through me, a reminder I'm not dead yet, although I'd rather be so.
It hurts.
I've been here for days, or so it feels. How can I still be alive? Is this what it means to be a Variant? Is that why he did that? Did he wish for my suffering?
It hurts.
I can't open my eyes anymore. They are so unbearably heavy. I can't feel the blood, neither coursing through my veins, nor gushing from my stomach.
It hurts.
How much longer? I wish it'd be faster. I suppose that's my luck. I'll wait, until my body grows cold, I'll wait. My head is ringing, I can't feel my limbs. Am I truly still alive?
So I wait. I don't have many options but the sweet release of death. I try to focus on the sounds that should be surrounding me, but it's silent. How fitting. Not even the woods will keep me company in my final moments.
The time passes. I'm not sure how long it has been now, but the rain is still here. Koh'or, my lord, are you mourning your servant? Oh how I hope you'll allow me to join you in your divine realm, even if I am but a blasphemous being.
I feel something, it's poking me. Maybe a stick? No, it's too forceful. Ah, I'm tumbling over again. I hear a...voice? Can I ask for help?...Should I? No, I'd better stay quiet, it could be one of them.
I try to open my eyes, as much as I can. I see the sky, just barely. I see a man with dark hair and dirt on his face. That's not one of them. Safety. I want to speak, but I can't. I'm suddenly feeling more tired than before.
Warmth. I missed it. My back rests on something soft. I wish I could stay like this for the rest of my days. I open my eyes, finally. I'm met with a wooden roof. How odd. I try to stand, to touch it. My stomach suddenly aches. I cry out in pain and fall back.
The door slowly opens, revealing the man behind it. It's the one from before. He's not dirty anymore. Was he the one who brought me here? Why? He walks towards the bed, kneeling beside me. His face betrays his concern. I hope mine doesn't do the same.
"Are you alright child?"
I try to move again, to sit, so I can face him. Pain shoots through me, I wince. He helps me up
"You shouldn't move yet."
His voice isn't what I was expecting. It's gentle, like father's... I nod.
"Good. I'm glad you understand."
He sighs, in relief I believe. The tension leaves his face, slowly but surely.
"It is astounding how you were still alive when I found you"
He pauses, as if he was suddenly lost in thought.
"But I do suppose that's to be expected of a variant. What's your name child?"
...Rude. Lord, he talks too much. I could get a headache from this. I open my mouth but my voice comes out dry and laboured. Talking hurts.
"Raynne"
"let's get you something to eat Raynne. You must be starving"
He was right. I could feel my stomach growling and my insides twisting in pain. That was enough for me to accept his proposal, even if I was hesitant. What could I possibly do on an empty stomach?
I was treated to a meal that under my starving eyes looked like a feast, unlike anything I had tasted before. In reality it was not much more than what was needed to keep me going. Still, I stuffed my face like it was my last day on Istrold.
After I finished eating, I looked towards my...rescuer? Captor? I'm not sure what the dynamic is here. I should try to learn more. I speak up after a bit. I wasn't sure what to say.
"So..."
This is a lot more stressful than it should be, I'm sure of that. I can feel my wings tense up.
"...Who are you?"
He looks up at me, his expression unreadable.
"My name's Sammuel."
...That's... something. But not enough. I push away my plate.
"How did you find me Sam?"
"Sammuel."
"Sammuel." I repeat. Although it's just a name, I don't get why he's so annoyed. "So?"
"You were in my path. I couldn't just leave a dying...person, there"
Seriously? What was that? I've heard humans are wary of us but this is getting on my nerves.
"Aha.."
He nods and looks down again. He's reading something, but I can't see what. Not that it'd be much help. Father only taught me, he never let me read anything in the New Scribes. He said they've been compromised, whatever that may mean.
I should go back to the room. I want to lay down again. As I get up to leave, he looks at me again.
"Can you walk?"
Can I...is he serious??
"Do I look like I can't?"
"No, you seem very capable. But I meant long distance."
"Why would I need to walk long distance? The room is on the second floor"
He sighs. Did I say something odd?
"We need to get to my station. It's about 4 days from here. So, do you think you can do that?"
Oh so I'm a captive. I see.
"Not today"
He nods.
"Tomorrow then. Go rest for now. We'll leave at dawn"
I didn't want to listen, but I wouldn't have a say in it anyway. I make my way towards my room. Tomorrow will be a hard day, but for now, there's nothing more tempting than a warm bed on a chilly night like this.