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Dohoon’s first relationship started way back when he was in his second year of high school. He was those athletic guys who had the looks and personality, the perfect guy to date if you were an average high schooler. So it wasn’t surprising when he had been confessed to, countless times in different ways that often happens randomly.
During one of his football matches, a girl suddenly stood up and confessed her love for him. Loud and clear, the crowd went quiet for a second. Dohoon, who was in the middle of a match, got startled and stopped his tracks. Immediately trying to find whoever that person was.
Before he even knew it, the crowd started chanting, “Accept her, accept her!” Dohoon wouldn’t really dare. His eyes darted around his surroundings, hoping to find Youngjae, maybe he could help him. People often tell him that he ‘relies’ on Youngjae too much, though he tends to avoid the obvious and always end up pestering the younger about opinions on things.
”Yo dude, what are you even looking at?” His teammate asked, eyeing the empty seat that Dohoon was staring at, his eyes flickering with confusion as Dohoon finally teared his attention away, back towards the other. “Nothing, I am gonna accept her.”
Youngjae had already left.
Dohoon never knew why he left, he probably went somewhere and forgot to come back. Or, that’s what he thought the reason was until someone told him that he saw the girl talking to Youngjae in the lockers the day before. He never pressured an answer from Youngjae, he trusted his best friend over anybody else.
They started going out, Dohoon wouldn’t say he didn’t enjoy talking to her. She’s bright, has the same interests so they clicked a lot. Dohoon really liked talking to her. But the more he hung with her, the further it felt like he was separating from Youngjae. He thought it was probably because of relationship things. (Youngjae got into a relationship right after, he didn't question because he was fairly popular with people as him. Even though he was surprised when he told Dohoon that he was gay.)
Two months flew by, everything was going great for Dohoon. His grades were pretty good, he had amazing supportive friends (Youngjae being his biggest one), a great relationship with his girlfriend and everyone around him. Life was good, just for a small slip up came right after he was about to finish his second term.
“I have to move to another country after this semester ends, let’s break up. I’m sorry Dohoon-ssi.” Dohoon stared blankly, he didn’t feel too hurt, just a bit but he did felt like their relationship was more of a friendship in disguise considering that they actually never kissed, not even once.
They broke off on friendly terms, everyone wasn’t surprised, after all most of them bet that they wouldn’t even last long. Dohoon felt bad and always reassured her that ‘it’s fine, don’t listen to them.’ Well it didn’t really matter anymore, she moved, he moved on too.
He may care too much about other people, Youngjae would always tell him that. “But is it wrong?” Dohoon often asks Youngjae, who always hums and repeats the same old words. “No, it's not Dohoon-ah. It’s okay to feel like that about people sometimes, life is just like that.”
Only Youngjae could say those types of things with a sweet voice that always make Dohoon feel safe from his problems.
The first time he found out that he liked guys too was during his second year of college. He enrolled himself in the same classes with Youngjae just in case they get separated again for the next 365 days like his first year, to which, Dohoon almost died without him. (Thankfully they did or else Dohoon would’ve dragged Youngjae with him, no complaints.)
Dohoon was roomed with a guy that he instantly clicked with, Han Jihoon. They got along well despite knowing each other for less than a few hours. Surprisingly, he was older than Jihoon even being a first year and having more connections with people around the place than him.
Youngjae ended up rooming with a senior that was pretty popular around the higher class area. During classes or recesses Dohoon would always pester him about what the senior looked like, since he never saw him before, ever.
He always gets the same answer every time, “He’s a busy person, he wouldn’t have time for you Dohoon-ah.” Or, “No way I am introducing you both, he would definitely be annoyed by you 24/7.” Youngjae would answer plainly but the way he said it didn’t bother Dohoon, he thinks he’s annoying himself as well either way.
The younger’s attention is always on his assignments that Dohoon, never cared nor remember the contents of it. He whined in annoyance whenever his question gets rejected by him. “Fine! I’ll find him myself.”
He meant it. Every single day was like a chore to him, bickering with Youngjae about how much he hated the way he treated him like a “situationship”, earning a scowl from Youngjae with a smile on his face from time to time.
He finds himself doing things he never does, following Youngjae like a hopeless puppy, people often whisper about it whenever they pass by the halls or during their lectures but Dohoon couldn’t care less.
It’s like his life depended on this one mysterious roommate of Youngjae’s. He’s come to terms that yes, he was curious. Too curious about someone who he had never met before.
During the following weeks of his “finding sunbae” operation passed by, Dohoon had noticed Youngjae had been giddy lately, it made him a little annoyed that when they hang out, he would always be on his phone giggling like a high school girl. (Which he finds cute but he would never admit that.)
He would end up asking, “Who’s that?” Or, “Youngjae-ah, pay attention to me.” In a whiny and desperate tone, not caring if Youngjae was annoyed or not. But he would shrug off saying it's just a random meme he saw, something along the lines if Dohoon could recount it.
It didn’t take long for Dohoon to introduce Youngjae to his roommate. Dohoon thinks it fair because the moment he met Jihoon back then, he already told Youngjae about Jihoon. Not that it matters anymore, he is finally meeting the mysterious sunbae that everyone has been talking about!
When Dohoon saw the senior for the first time, his eyes wavered, his muscles stiff as he slowly formed his words. “He’s.. pretty.” Youngjae sighed, smacking him from the back carefully, “I know, that’s why I didn’t wanna introduce you to him at first,” His words hung low, Dohoon saw the quick flicker in Youngjae’s eyes. He jolted suddenly when he finally heard a voice, more different that what Dohoon thought would sound like.
There stood a slightly taller and firm figure right in front of them. Junghwan’s lips formed a smile. “Youngjae-ah you’re back,” The older paused, eyeing the other who was near Youngjae. The way he called Youngjae casual made his heart ache, just a bit. He shyly smiled, Dohoon wouldn’t miss that.
“and you must be Dohoon?” Dohoon bit his lip nervously, his eyes directly staring at the older. Heart leaping so fast that it might literally fall out of his chest and run away. Youngjae raised an eyebrow at the sudden silence, Dohoon finally spat out his words. “Yes I am..” Dohoon fidgeted his fingers, he didn’t know why he was feeling that way. “Y-you must be Youngjae’s roommate right?”
Junghwan gave a nod, following with a smile. A sign of acknowledgement. Dohoon didn’t know if he should get hit by the nearest truck or jump off the nearest railing, but damn his smile is intoxicating for him. Despite that, he, still think he’s straight. Yes, there was no way he was gay.
But before he even realized it himself, he found himself chasing Junghwan the following months. Dohoon planned and execute his plans for every single day without pause. Asking if he wanted to grab a snack, asking if he could help him with his assignments, basically any excuse to get close to Junghwan.
Practically anyone could tell that he was head over heels for the senior, well everyone was. Even Youngjae who was always there when Dohoon asked for Junghwan’s accompany. But Dohoon never really thought about it, because Youngjae never share much about his feelings to anybody. At least that’s what Youngjae always tell him.
Junghwan and Youngjae’s dorm is neat whenever Dohoon comes to visit it. Although their dorms were quite far from Dohoon and Jihoon’s, he never fail to make a frequent visit just for Junghwan. Maybe today was his lucky day because he aced his tests with the help of Junghwan’s tutoring sessions recently.
And today was another day where he’s gonna ask Junghwan questions again, thinking it was just gonna be another normal day where he would enjoy Junghwan’s company and his ridiculous inducing smile that makes Dohoon melt all the time. Youngjae didn’t appear to class that day, so it was a double visit for him which makes his life easier. Or, that’s what he thought was gonna happen.
“Are Junghwan hyung and Youngjae hyung dating?” Jihoon once asked, Dohoon looked at him blankly before finally laughing. “No way they are.” He shrugged every time someone brought up that topic, maybe he felt insecure about it. His best friend and his crush? Yeah that’s definitely gonna fuck him up in a way for sure.
Dohoon quietly made his way around the living room and the kitchen, finally arriving face front the door of Junghwan’s and Youngjae’s shared bedroom. It was eerily quiet, usually it never bother Dohoon that much but he felt the need so that moment. As he was about to twist the handle, hushed voices were heard behind the door, making Dohoon instantly freeze, it was Junghwan’s voice.
“There’s nothing going on with me and him, Youngjae-ah. I promise you.” Junghwan’s voice ringed his ears, voice filled with reassurance. Dohoon’s breath hitched, who were they talking about? And what were they doing?
Youngjae spoke up, voice laced with a slight hint of anger, words twisting up every possible good luck Dohoon had this morning. “Are you sure? Do not play with me Shin Junghwan.”
Full name.
Yeah no, in his 19 whole years of living, he had never heard Youngjae be this serious to the point that he would use someone’s full name, especially someone who is older than him. Call it overreacting, but he and Youngjae are stuck like glue since little, they go way back. So he knows every single detail about him.
Dohoon listened from the other side, did he interrupt an important moment?
“I swear, I’ll tell him soon. I just don’t want to make him upset, he’s your best friend Jae.” Youngjae’s lip quivered, finally releasing a shaken sigh. His eyes a little glossy from the slight conflict, Junghwan’s hand finds his, intertwining them, waiting for an answer. “Right. I think.. I should tell him too. I feel bad that I am dating you, even though I know he likes you.”
He paused. Dohoon heart clenched, his breathing accelerating faster than he could think. Probably more faster than his unruly amount of sugar consumption that might kill him one day, or the time where he got dumped by a girl he liked in his first year of college.
He shouldn’t be hearing this. Nor he was suppose to find this out. Hell he shouldn’t even listen to it in the first place, but he felt betrayed. Not just because of Junghwan, but Youngjae.
Before he could even notice it, his hand slipped, the door that was concealing the secret? Yeah it didn’t take an idiot to figure out what to do next. His head blurred, seeing their shocked expressions already made it worse for him. Shit, he’s goners. Youngjae who was facing the door, fumbled his words but made up his line. “Wait— fuck, Dohoon?!”
It was all it took before Dohoon hastily ran out of the dorm. Hell what a way to find out that your crush was in love with your best friend. Now it was evident that they were dating. For how long? Dohoon had no clue since he wasn’t thinking straight, it isn’t that important to him at the moment.
The moment he arrived at the dorm, Jihoon turned towards him in surprise, as he joked, “Did you just run a mile just now? Your face is red hyung.” Dohoon didn’t answer, locking himself in his room. His roommate panicked, “Wait, what’s wrong?!”
He ignored the two for the rest of the day, which turned into weeks, into a month without any conversation. Youngjae would often knock on his door apologizing for it. But he always got shut down or dismissed by Dohoon. He wasn’t ready to face him yet. It probably would turn ugly.
But recently, Youngjae stopped. And he felt annoyed.
Now that he thought about it, he felt bad for himself, and maybe a bit of hatred towards them. But he couldn’t bring himself to. Not that he’d ever hate Youngjae, after all, his problems were always resolved with the help of the younger.
Maybe he had his reasons.
Dohoon felt really annoyed that he even thought about hating on his one and only best friend since they were little over a guy. Thus he decided to finally man up and talk to him.
He walked through the familiar corridors of the dormitory, although he hasn’t walked here ever since the incident, it looked different. Way too different for Dohoon’s perspective. But he digresses, it’s not the issue he has on his sleeve right now.
Surprisingly, the door was opened. Which was already a sign of “what the hell?” Ringing in his brain.
Youngjae’s not that type of person to leave his door open. Dohoon immediately opened the door. He may or maybe not have expected to face a happy Youngjae that would be delighted to see him again, but he was met with a boy with tears brimming down his delicate face, eyes widening in shock.
“Fuck,” Youngjae cursed, wiping his tears with his hands, averting his gaze in embarrassment. Dohoon didn’t like this feeling, before he could even process it, he rushed over to the other’s side.
Never in his life did he ever see the Choi Youngjae crying. Okay, maybe as a kid but that’s for another time. He clenched his fist, thinking about that fact that who made him cry like that? His knuckles turning white from the grip.
“Youngjae-ah, what’s wrong?” He pressed, fingers caressing Youngjae’s wet cheek. But when he didn’t reply, Dohoon let out a sigh as he crouched down towards Youngjae’s height. (Who was on the floor, arms crossed, still turned away from him.)
Dohoon wouldn’t say that he was that annoyed, but he was. There, Youngjae felt a pair of hands cupping his face, a pair of eyes looking through his swollen ones.
“How embarrassing..” He muttered under his breath, just enough for Dohoon to hear. “What’s wrong? Did something happen between you and Junghwan?” Dohoon asked, earning a surprised look from Youngjae who immediately turned towards him.
“Oh.. him.” Youngjae’s lip parted slightly, before closing it right after. He recalled it very clearly, breath hitched, “I am not really.. that mad that you dated Junghwan, but I was mad that you didn’t tell me beforehand.”
Dohoon waited for Youngjae’s reaction, all he got? A giggle. A fucking giggle. “Hey! I was really worried—“ He didn’t even finish when Youngjae’s finger landed on his lips, signaling a “shh”. Dohoon froze for a minute, slowly turning red, retreating his hand away with a hiss.
“I was dating him,” Dohoon already knew, it doesn’t matter anymore. “But we just broke up. He’s leaving abroad.” He said with a slight smile that felt bittersweet when Dohoon thinks about it now.
Just like me and the girl you set me up with huh?
“Wait but you were crying, real hard.” He butts in, still confused about that fact. Youngjae cooed, “I was watching a really sad movie to ease my mood, but it ended up being so bad my eyes balled, Dohoon-ah.”
“Oh.”
That day Dohoon was a day that he never regretted living in. Maybe it’s because he got his best friend back.
“I’m sorry Dohoon, about Christmas? I can’t do it. Let’s break up, I don't like you anymore.”
Youngjae laid on his bed, his mind twisting endlessly around the scenario of one specific occasion, Christmas.
He had his fair share of both sides of Christmas, mostly always negative because of his family members or friends would always never end up staying more longer than until dinner was done.
He admits, he never spent Christmas with Dohoon— that’s right. Not a single Christmas with Kim Dohoon. Youngjae never had the strength to ask since Dohoon always thrown himself into random dates, random mixers or a relationship from now and then before he could even confidently mutter an invitation.
Ironic how people always say that they were both inseparable.
He knows that if he asked, Dohoon would definitely agree right away. But his partners are always giving him the glare whenever Dohoon ask Youngjae to tag along, which ends up with him being mad mouthed when Dohoon went to find something or get something.
”Can’t you just stay away from him?” One of his boyfriends snarled at Youngjae, although they sat on the opposite side of each other, he still felt alerted. Because in one of the other encounters he had, he ended up getting slapped in the face right in front of Dohoon.
The next day Dohoon broke up with the girl who slapped Youngjae, “It’s my fault, I should’ve not went with you and her.” The older sighed, resting his hand on Youngjae’s shoulder, whispering sweetly to Youngjae. He feels guilty that his heart was feeling this way.
Not after he broke their trust just a few months ago, and the way that Dohoon forgave him that easily made his stomach twist every time he think about it. Either way, Youngjae had already given up pursuing Dohoon for Christmas, at least that’s what he thought would happen.
Youngjae slumped over his bed, draping a blanket on himself.
Suddenly his phone lid up, he grumbled, swiping it open, his eyes scanning the message.
Dohoonie
Youngjae-ah, stay at ur cafe at 6pm?
I wanna see you..
Youngjae hands responded rather quickly. Eyes wide in surprised, heartbeat a little too loud for his liking. The heartstrings of his will kill him one day. And he blames Cupid for making him realize that he likes his best friend.
Youngjae
Alright, see you Dohoon-ah
Christmas was a special occasion for couples and family. This year, no, every Christmas is always painfully boring for Youngjae. As much as he love spending time with his family, they always had to busy themselves quite literally after they eat dinner. Only sparing a ‘We’re sorry, but we have to work honey.’ And eventually, Youngjae came to terms to it, but he still felt lonely.
He finds himself in front of the same cafe that he work at. Usually he would be behind the counter working his ass off during his hour long shifts that barely had any break, but he does make good income. So he wouldn’t say that he is broke, just a normal wedging person like others. Dohoon always tells him to just work for him instead, although Youngjae always flat right refuses to take such a job.
This time, he came here as Choi Youngjae. Not the Youngjae that always had a smile plastered on his face placing the drinks for the customers, or the Youngjae, the strikingly handsome barista who always spoke kindly towards everyone, even if they were rude to him.
His body shivered each second without fail even with the puffer jacket that his mother sent him for Christmas as an apology for not having time for Christmas with him this year.
It’s cold.
As much as he wanted to go in to avoid the cold weather, sheltering under the warm cafe and its cozy, welcoming environment, he stayed there. Or maybe, he just knows well that he might come around the corner anytime soon waiting to surprise him. Although the street lights were beginning to flicker open, Youngjae still stood.
Just a tat longer. He’ll be here.
It doesn’t take a genius to figure it out, my, his Dohoon is so predictable when it comes to surprising people. Youngjae remembered during middle school, Dohoon would always make a fool out of himself trying to catch Youngjae off guard, whether it was in the chattering school halls, busy and quiet libraries, or even the breezy park that they always hung out at. Dohoon always try to scare him.
“Boo!” The cat eyed boy who was still short, considering he was still in middle school tapped on the other’s shoulder. Who, nonchalantly ignored him. Dohoon frowned, “Youngjae-ah.. I’m upset, pay attention to me!” His arms crossed with a pouty look on his cheeks, complimenting his cute features that people always swoon at when they were little.
”Fine,” Youngjae replied before adding, “But you really suck at scaring people, you’re so predictable.” Dohoon grumbled tackling Youngjae as they made their way across the park towards their neighboring houses.
He missed the old times, but they’re adults now, they can’t have fun like those days anymore. They both have their own perspective lifestyles, Dohoon inherited his parents company, while Youngjae worked as a barista around his apartment complex.
”Youngjae-ah!” The boy grinned ear to ear, Youngjae’s attention finally shifted. His heart leaped slowly in the cold weather. “Dohoon-ah.”
Dohoon grumbled as his face fell flat on the cold surface of the table, echoing the silent walls of the cafe that they just stood in front of an hour ago. His voice feud with frustration. “Youngjae-ah.. Am I really unloveable? I’m so mad that to the point I can’t even enjoy Christmas anymore..” Dohoon ranted while Youngjae listened in.
“And you know what his reason was? ‘I actually never liked you to begin with, you only had a pretty face.’ It was so infuriating that I punched him in the face before leaving, serves him right!” He scoffed before slowly grabbing the drink that Youngjae had brand newly made a few minutes ago.
Youngjae looked up at Dohoon, who made his furious remark towards the ex. Watching him take a sip of his drink, his lips curled into a smile.
“Then spend christmas with me.” Dohoon choked on his hot chocolate, his mouth shot wide open.
“what?”
Okay, Youngjae did mention he was gonna stop pursuing Dohoon for Christmas, but honestly, whoever that boyfriend was? He just did him a favor.
Not to spite Dohoon, but his partners are always shit. They’re stuck up and like controlling people around them, And Dohoon? He follows them like a puppy, and Youngjae hates it. But does he have the heart to say it aloud? No. Because it didn’t matter to him, that's what Youngjae initially thought until he realized his feelings.
A month after Youngjae’s breakup with Junghwan, he tends to make it look like he took it lightly, but his heart still ache.
“Youngjae-ah I’m sorry.”
Was the last thing he heard from Junghwan before he got a text from his friends saying that Junghwan had already left aboard. At first he played it cool, no one knew about it, but Dohoon does, of course he had to find out at the worst possible time. Youngjae hadn’t seen him in a month now, his frequent visits to Dohoon wasn’t as frequent anymore ever since Junghwan moved.
It doesn’t matter anymore, Youngjae had since forgotten about his memories with Junghwan by now, replacing them with his and Dohoon’s. He would always find himself going to Dohoon whenever he needed mortal support, even though he guise it as a “I just wanna rest for a bit.” leaning his head against Dohoon’s chest.
Their friendship was unlike Youngjae’s other friends, not like Kyungmin, Hanjin, nor his newly freshy bloomed friendship with Jihoon. But it was completely different from everyone else, at first he had initially thought it was because they’ve been friends longer than the others.
When a girl came up to him asking for help on pursuing Dohoon, his breath hitched, but he was a nice guy.
“Okay, sure I’ll help you.” Youngjae responded, and he did. Watching it unfold was a bitter feeling for the younger. Those two got together, while he and Dohoon distanced because of his relationship.
Dohoon looked at him surprised, “You’re gay?”
“Yeah.” Youngjae admits dryly, it was the first time in almost a long time where he actually tell someone about his feelings, his heart pounding hard it might just slip out. Why? He wasn’t sure if Dohoon would actually accept that fact. But Dohoon responded to him, “Well, I support you.” A glint of his eye shining as bright as ever, reminding him of their first encounter.
Youngjae had been a quiet kid, the type of kid who would often prefer doing things by himself. Not relying on people, nor tell anyone about himself. That was until— Dohoon came in the picture.
"You look lonely." Youngjae looked up, locking eyes with the slightly small figure in front of him. He wasn't that small, but Youngjae was definitely a bit taller than him.
He wouldn't say that he's a judger, but he had to say that the kid in front of him was really pretty, more pretty than any boy he had ever met. "I wouldn't say I am." Youngjae found himself answering for the first time, the other boy's eye sparked in excitement. He grinned widely, "So you do know how to talk! I've been looking at you for some time now, you know?"
It was the first time that anyone actually paid attention to Youngjae, it didn't take him long to finally give in Dohoon's persistent nature of trying to befriend him.
"Don't keep me waiting, Dohoon-ah," Dohoon blinked, before he could even process it, Youngjae had already bid his farewells and told him to, "Close the doors for me! the keys are on the table if you were wondering." While he went out.
Dohoon felt heat pooling through his cheeks, what was that all about? And.. was Youngjae inviting him on a date? The more he thought about it the more he got flustered just thinking about it.
He's gonna be the death of me.
He lazily grabbed the keys, dragged himself up, swinging the keys on the lock and shutting the door. The cold wind blew right under his nose, causing him to let out a trembling shiver under the thick layers of his coat.
"I should've asked for a ride." Dohoon sighed, nevertheless, he ended up walking his way back to his residence that was way too far than Dohoon had anticipated.
On the other hand, Youngjae sat on his couch reminiscing about what he had just done just an hour ago.
"Fuckkk..." Youngjae grumbled as his weight fell down on the cushions, swinging his arm on a black cat plushy that Dohoon had bought for him on his birthday a few months ago—Youngjae never sleeps without it ever since then. "Why did I do that?” He rolled around in annoyance as he clicked his tongue from the embarrassment.
"Do what hyung?" Youngjae gasped, he freezes immediately, straightening himself—while still holding on to the plush. Youngjae's roommate, Hanjin looked at him confused. Usually Youngjae wouldn't panic this bad for no reason.
His face instantly changed into a sweet smile, "Oh Hanjin-ah, you're back. It's nothing, don't worry about it!" Although he wasn't good at hiding things, regardless, Hanjin still believes it as he nods his head and goes to his room. “If you say so hyung..” He responded as the door shut close, Youngjae sighed in relief, he sure loves embarrassing himself.
For the record, he's still pleased that he actually even asked Dohoon to go on a Christmas date with him. But there was one problem,
Where or what the hell are they even gonna do or go to?
That question didn't cross his mind when he proposed the idea, now he feels like an idiot. Youngjae kicked his feet around the edges of the sofa, venting his frustrations, finally figuring out an idea.
Youngjae
SOS date ideas for christmas, anybody??
Kyungmin
?? A date? Hyung did you get back with Junghwan hyung?
Jihoon
Absolutely not, he’s still abroad right now
Also first of all.. context??? And two, aren't you single
I thought you like Dohoon hyung?
Isn't he still dating that guy.. what his name??
I couldn't care less but ?? Explain yourself
Youngjae
I asked Dohoon to spend Christmas with me
And.. he broke up with his boyfriend so yea
Kyungmin
And you just shoot your shot? LOLOL
Hyung that's crazy
Youngjae
LOOK that guy was a scumbag
Plus, It's probably just gonna be like our usual hangouts
Hanjin
It's definitely a date
Also this must be why you were screaming when I came home earlier..
Youngjae
Sorry Hanjin-ah.. well
I don't know what to do so it WOULD be great if someone give me an idea
Jihoon
Date at his place
And then you both get under the mistletoe together and then kiss—
Kyungmin
That's just crazy no way
How about you both just go out..
Like ice skating or something together, it's cute right?!
Those couples in my class often say they go there
Jihoon
Definitely no way!
They need alone time, it's the most perfect way!
Kyungmin
Aw come on, Youngjae hyung is probably bored staying in!
It's literally Christmas, they should go outside instead
Youngjae
So umm.. Hanjin what do you think?
These two are never gonna choose oh my god
Hanjin
Anything works, it's the quality time that matters hyung :)
Youngjae finally reached towards a conclusion. Being an introvert he is, it is hard for him to actually enjoy going out as per kyungmin’s suggestion. But Youngjae still ends up finding himself in a decorative shop.
He skimmed through the whole neighborhood for hours just to find the perfect spot, his hands sighed in defeat as he may or may not have spent over the budget last minute just for this whole thing.
Feeling small, he decided to leave immediately from the shop. It was suffocating when that’s the only good place near him that actually sell good decorations. While scrolling through the things earlier, he stumbled upon a cute looking black cat that reminds him of Dohoon.
Youngjae instantly brought it, which, turns out to be the reason why he overspent. Making his way back, he felt a light weight fell on his shoulders, indicating one thing for sure—it’s finally Christmas.
Youngjae decked out his apartment the moment he arrives home. (With the help of Hanjin before he go visit his parents in China) It wasn’t ideal, but it was better than sitting an a high rise fancy restaurant with Dohoon’s parents for sure. Youngjae adores Dohoon’s parents though, they treat him way too well for his own good.
After putting the last decoration on the tree, Youngjae falls on the couch in exhaustion. It had been almost six hours since he first started it, Hanjin left around two or three hours ago which made things harder for Youngjae to figure out because he didn’t exactly have the knowledge of how people actually put these things on.
The rest wasn’t hard for Youngjae to figure out. Food was way easier and simple than putting decorations from left to right for hours straight—don’t get him started with the Christmas tree, that part practically made him go limp just by fixing the edges and re-adjusting it. Youngjae didn’t like how it first appeared like, it looked messy and awkwardly tall for his liking—completely scrapping his initial idea of going for a “make it simple and leave it” approach.
Cooking was the least of his problems, he wasn’t as skilled, but he wasn’t bad either. As long as it’s edible then it’s fine by him. Dohoon always ask Youngjae to cook for him way back during high school, often mentioning that his cooking was the best—Youngjae wouldn’t say that he didn’t feel flustered whenever Dohoon compliments him, and it has never changed.
Their schedules and jobs don’t overlap, meaning—they barely see each other. Youngjae had gotten used to it ever since the Junghwan incident, but he still felt empty sometimes whenever Dohoon is too busy to visit during his shifts. He knows that the only sole reason why he even goes there is for Youngjae’s latte—which, the older would say that it was the best latte he had in a life time. Youngjae would end up rolling his eyes, the tip of his ears going red.
It was the day before christmas, so obviously he had to finish it right before midnight or he might actually lose it. That was the first time where he actually acknowledge Christmas as a important occasion for once.
Youngjae wraps up—finally allowed to breathe, the air conditioner blew right through his nasal as his back landed on the kitchen counter with a breathy sigh. The clock hits exactly past twelve, his eyes scrammed around the room, observing for even the littlest misplacement—just in case Dohoon would be bothered by it.
But here's the thing—he knows Dohoon wouldn't even care to notice it. Regardless, he still does it anyway. The same cat that Youngjae had impulsively bought was wrapped in a green plastic wrapper which surprisingly blended well with the tree, what a coincidence.
That night Youngjae went to sleep terribly. His anxiety got way ahead of himself, head tilting and drooping constantly before finally dozing off in a haze the next hour.
Dohoon came over that evening, well dressed to the point where Youngjae couldn't think of anything else other than his handsome face that night.
"Did you seriously transform the whole apartment just for this Youngjae-ah?" Dohoon's eye glinted when he first stepped in the apartment flat, surprised on how Youngjae had actually manage to completely turn it from a cozy-ish home to a full blown christmas festive celebration banquet that Dohoon's mom would often drag him along to—except it still felt warm unlike the blinding lights, crowded yet spacious grandy ballroom that always made Dohoon feel like shit whenever he had to meet new people.
As an introvert, Youngjae had perfectly understood assignment and polished it well, just for him. Dohoon wore a grin when he faced Youngjae, the same ones that always made the younger's heart leap. "Mhm.. I don't know if you like it or not, but just so you know—I worked really hard for this." Youngjae's face displayed a cute pout as both of his cheeks flushed in rhythm to Dohoon's tease.
Dohoon suddenly blooped his nose. Youngjae let out a small yelp, scrambling away with a hiss. "How cute~ You did great Youngjae-ah."
Youngjae swears that if he suddenly, unexpectedly die today—the reason would be Kim Dohoon and his stupid flirty remarks.
He scoffed, "Just.. come in." Dohoon didn't make haste as he quickly swept in from the chillingly cold climate that somehow went in even though the window right beside Youngjae's flat was closed.
The door shuts closed, before Dohoon could process from his initial shock from the view of the place he got before sliding through the doors of the flat, Youngjae quickly took out a scarf and wrapped it around Dohoon. His face was still red from earlier, he couldn't help but shut up when Youngjae's hand guide around his neck as his breath slowly hitched unexpectedly. The moment he pulled away, the tension he felt earlier dissipated completely, leaving only a heart beating in never ending circles as if he ran a national marathon for Korea an hour before that.
"You better not get sick," Youngjae muttered, voice low but just enough for Dohoon to hear. "I won't," He paused, the other raised an eyebrow on the sudden pause. His lips curled into a smirk. "Just for you."
Dohoon ended up getting his head hit from the back that night.
Time passed as they ate and laughed around each other. Youngjae made Dohoon's favorite, the one that he was dying to eat in a while. It started way earlier during their high school days, when there was one time where Dohoon and Youngjae's parents went on a vacation together, leaving the two alone.
Youngjae scrolled through his phone without a care, he felt a little rebellious knowing that he was finally alone.. or so he thought. "Youngjae-ah, I'm hungry." His gaze lifted to find Dohoon's who looked at him with those cute pleading doe eyes.
"Make something then." He replied coldly, shifting his attention back to the screen—but the phone gets snatched away from him before he could even protest. Youngjae realizing this, tackled Dohoon to the floor. "Give me my phone!" The younger raised his voice slightly, not too harsh for Dohoon to lose heart. Dohoon had always been a very sensitive and shy kid, despite his looks, calm demeanor, and the way that he first approached Youngjae.
Dohoon frowned when Youngjae started to actually be serious—letting go the phone as it fell perfectly on the younger's palm, pulling away before speaking up. "I know you and my mom often make chicken together, can you make it for me please?" Youngjae wanted to protest, but he ended up doing so anyway.
It ended up being Dohoon's favorite dish till this day, whenever he visits Youngjae, it was a must-have dish at all times on special occasions like their high school graduation day.
Lately they both had been busy with their respective jobs. Dohoon and Youngjae had their busy days, especially Dohoon because of his inheritance of his dad's company. It had been one of the many reasons why Dohoon could barely see Youngjae during his usual morning coffees that he only go for if he knew that Youngjae was on shift. At first—Dohoon was skeptical when Youngjae said that he was gonna have a full-time barista job.
"What? You got a job as a barista?" Dohoon's mouth fell agape when the other dropped the news on him out of nowhere, Youngjae looked dead serious about it. At that point he shouldn't even be surprised about how random Youngjae was sometimes, but the way he said it so casually raised eyebrows from the older.
What is he saying?
Dohoon was expecting any other job like a singer, or just anything but that. But barista? That was surprising to hear considering that Youngjae didn't like socializing much. "Mhm. Is it that surprising?" He tilted his head, looking so innocent that Dohoon had to pause his initial response. "Yeah." He said breathy, ignoring whatever that was.
"You actually brought something? I didn't even notice." The older eyed the small looking present under the tree, the color was green—as if Youngjae was camouflaging it on purpose. Youngjae nodded slowly, making his way to grab it and threw it carefully to Dohoon, knowing that he would catch it.
Dohoon's hand caught the present that was thrown at him perfectly, his smirk not flattering for a minute at all. "Open it.. It's not much though." Youngjae bit his lip anxiously showing signs of facial complexion as Dohoon's finger finds and loosen the tie of the ribbon, in careful strokes that Youngjae tried hard to ignore. "I don't care what you give, you already done so much." He shot a smile, one of his hands brushing against Youngjae's causing him to flinch by the contact, an obvious sign of reassurance.
The wrapper went undone and it appeared to be—
"A cat?" He questioned while his hands slowly reached and ran through the fur of the object. "It reminded me of you so.. I bought it." Dohoon's eye averted to Youngjae's, they both went silent. Not because of awkwardness, but a fleeting heartbeat that was shared between the lines of 'friendship'. "That's sweet of you Youngjae-ah." A smile formed through his lips, leaving Youngjae breathless.
"Yeah.." A hint of redness rose from his ear, Dohoon couldn't help but notice it, his own, unable to contain a grin.
After unwrapping the presents Dohoon had been been a good mood unlike earlier morning where he had to attend a meeting just exactly on christmas, he had almost missed their little house date but screw that. Youngjae asked if he wanted to watch a movie with him earlier meaning—they're gonna sit near each other. His eyes lit up immediately agreeing, searching through his phone for recommendations of the 'perfect christmas' movie.
That's how Dohoon ended up sitting near Youngjae watching a very sappy christmas movie that they got off from Tiktok. It was embarrassingly cringe and boring that almost made him doze off, the only thing keeping him awake was Youngjae to be fair. The movie may be trash but not the person sitting near him that's a fact since he couldn't avert his attention away from the other. Suddenly a shriek screeched the room, causing Dohoon to finally zone back.
"This is.. getting.." Youngjae stumbled his words, in a hushed and low voice that dripped through his ears. Dohoon slightly shifted on the couch and turned his attention to what was happening. And of course there's a reason why they should never trust Tiktok for ideas. Realizing this,
Dohoon hastily grabbed the remote and switched it off in a fright of what he had just seen. He switched his attention to Youngjae who looked like a blushing mess. Which he found kind of cute. "Thank god." Youngjae let out a heavy sigh, his cheeks were visibly red when his weight fell on Dohoon's shoulder by instinct.
Youngjae immediately yanked himself but was caught back by Dohoon's arms pulling him to his chest. "W-wait.. why are you—?"
"Just lean on me." Dohoon's tone switched as his went closer to Youngjae's face, studying it clearly. He looked extra pretty today for his liking, after quite holding himself for the past 3 hours of trying too hard not to touch him, he could finally say that he—failed, successfully?
Youngjae's mouth formed an 'oh' as heat pooled through his cheeks, no longer tensed and looking straight through Dohoon's eyes. He wished he could just screw being a coward just grab him by the face and just kiss him already—because this was killing him type of feeling that he had to go through every time they hung out.
It was as if Dohoon had literally read his mind, inching closer to his own and consumed by the moment. The respect left his body when his free hand pulled Dohoon’s tie, completely closing the gap between them in a heat of rush.
Their lips slotted each other’s perfectly in slow rhythm that brought butterflies to Youngjae’s stomach. The way Dohoon deepened it only made his heart race faster as dizziness took him over. He gripped the tie harder, probably to the ‘choking’ proximity when he heard Dohoon let out a scowl.
The remaining sanity he had left in his body snapped, he pulled away in an instant. Face flushed and an over the top racing heartbeat that would burst if it continued. Youngjae loosened his grip from the tie, facing face to face with Dohoon. The other looked just as flustered as him, and the same lips he just kissed.. made it worse for Youngjae’s heart.
“That.. never happened, understood—” Youngjae gasped out in a rush, his breath running short—only for Dohoon, to attack him by the lips again. A soft sound escaping his lips that caused Dohoon to smirk between their lips, finally parting them after.
“I like you, no screw that— I love you Choi Youngjae.”
Shock was an understatement in Youngjae’s books. It’s just.. he never expected Dohoon to like him back after these past few rough years of friendship that they kept trying to rebuild every time, it’s not like their friendship was rocky, no never. It’s the time frequency that made it harder to maintain when their jobs are total opposites—Dohoon’s was success, his was a passion. Two different things.
His lips parted without a single word pouring out of it. Youngjae was seriously shocked beyond words, and Dohoon? He waited. He waited so patiently for an answer it made his stomach flutter too much for his own health.
Before he even realized it—a tear fell down his cheek, causing Dohoon to panic.
Dohoon’s pulled his arms away from Youngjae, lifting his head up towards his shoulder level and wrapping the arm around Youngjae. Causing his cheek to fall right directly on his shoulder once more for reassurance, whispering sweet words to him. “I’m sorry for abruptly saying this, I know you like me too.. Jihoon told me.” He admits, it finally made sense.
Youngjae let out a shaky laugh, “Jihoon? I swear I’ll kill him one day.” hiding his face behind his hand titling his head on Dohoon’s shoulder—which made him jolted back straight. Dohoon let out a giggled, making Youngjae’s heart thump again. “So is it a yes?” He asked, already knowing his answer.
“I love you too Kim Dohoon, maybe a little too much.”
Youngjae’s words didn’t disappoint him either, he finally captured the other for a kiss again. Heat pooling through his stomach, whilst the window across them were covered with icy thick snow. Their hearts slowly melted into each other’s embrace despite the frost-cold bite weather.
It ended up being their best Christmas in a long time after that, and Dohoon’s favorite gift.