Work Text:
Invel was seriously considering the ramifications of murdering his colleagues.
Not his equals on the Twelve, no, not this time. The ones to draw his ire this time were the incompetent idiots who'd, somehow, managed to put spelling mistakes in the formal documents that kept the Empire running.
Really. He didn't know why people said he lacked a festive spirit: he hadn't fired a single soul for this incomprehensible mess.
He sighed. There was nothing for it: he would simply have to make this one a rather late night. The snow was sitting heavy on his windowsill already, but he was hardly one to complain about that, and regardless the fire in his chamber was merrily blazing- more for the gentle crackle and soothing light than it's warmth, mind, but he would hardly be complaining of the added benefit.
For some time, the only sounds were the scratching of his quill, and the distant echoes of revalry.
And then, heavy, drunken footsteps making their way towards his office.
Invel sighed.
He quickly scrambled to finish the document he was working on, lest he lose his place. He just managed to sign it and set it aside as the interruptions crashed into his office without so much as a knock.
"Whichever of you four cause the least public destruction tonight will win a tub of ice cream." He'd put much thought into this. The competition alone would get Dimaria and Ajeel in line, and Wall couldn't get drunk in the first place given his physiology, and thus would do whatever he pleased regardless. Brandish was the only one the prize actually mattered for... "How are you already struggling to walk straight...?"
"Pregaming my good friend!" Ajeel laughed, slinging an arm around his shoulders, "You're a little behind, but won't you tag along...?"
"The paperwork still gonna be there t'mmorow!" Dimaria chimed in, already slumping over Brandish's shoulders, "I've got a whole pile of it to deal with!"
"Don't brag about that."
"Lighten up a little...?" Brandish sighed, hypocritically, "I mean, honestly... Do you ever even leave your desk?"
"It will be mint chocolate chip."
"...Noted, shutting up."
"C'mon pal, you won't rob me of a data point will you?" Wall tried, doing a very poor impression of a puppy- Invel would need a word with whomever taught him that. Or, well. Whomever tried to. "I need a decent sample size over here!"
"These need resolving before the months end. Leaving them unresolved will simply mean more work in what should be an idle period..." Invel sighed. To be completely honest, he simply didn't want to participate in this particular groups idea of a fun Christmas, but saying that to their face was...
...well. It was Christmas after all.
"C'mooon! It'll be a blast!" Dimaria slurred, slumping even lower into Brandish' side. "It's a- a friendly... ness... Improvy... Thingy..."
"...How much has she...?"
"Uh... she was already drinking when we met up, I think?" Ajeel shrugged scratching the back of his neck. "I reckon she's been trying to shut the big man in her head up..."
"...Wall?"
"Yeah?"
"Make sure whatever she does doesn't reach my desk, and I'll ignore your next expense report."
"Make it two."
"Deal."
"That seems a fairly solid no..." Brandish sighed. "Oh, who could've predicte- I did. I predicted this would be a waste of time. And told you so. I told you so."
"Yeah yeah, whatever." Ajeel laughed, finally turning around to leave Invel in peace. "Worth a shot- I'll get you one year Invy!"
"Don't call me that."
With a wave, the headaches were gone.
Invel sighed.
A quick stretch of his back later, he decided to get a fresh coffee. His mug had sat empty long enough the ceramic had become icy, and it would be better to get one now than to disturb his rhythm a second time, later into the eve.
Last year's Christmas gift from Wall had been a strange device that sped the brewing process significantly- while also reducing waste and allowing more experimentation with techniques.
He'd been quite touched by the thought- at least until Wall had used it as leverage to convince him to budge on his policy not to tinker with anything else in his office. Still, it sat pride of place, and with good reason...
And yet, even with the wonderful invention, he'd barely say down before the next set of interruptions came.
"Invel." Jacob silently appeared behind him, bowing slightly. "Apologies for startling you. I have a request to make."
"Is it an urgent matter...?" Invel asked, biting back a sigh- Jacob was one of the more professional members of the Spriggan. But even Invel didn't relish abrubt additions to his workload... "Else can it be added to-"
"Seasons!" ...oh no. ".........greetings!"
"...you're on your own, Lessio."
"Invel please-"
"Ah, there you are Jacob!" Neinhart grinned, jovially ignoring Invel to lay an arm around Jacob's shoulders, "And here I thought I'd lost you! I was nearly abandoned, all alone, to show our dear friend God the wonders of an Alvarez christmas!"
"...Bloodman is also with us."
"Bloodman doesn't count."
"You are perfectly capable of showing-"
"And yet, is not the more the merrier?" Neinhart's smug grin made it clear he knew he had poor Jacob cornered. "Why, I'd ask dear Invel here to accompany us, were he not such a grim sourpuss..."
"Do your paperwork and I'll be nicer."
"Exactly as I said! So dour and drab..." Neinhart sighed. "Why, you could suck the festive spirit from santa himself!"
"...is there a reason this must happen in my office?"
"Is it not typical of the festive spirit?" God Serena mused, dramatically covering his eyes. "Even the glumest and most miserable of our compatriots shall be invited to join us tonight!"
"...Save me."
"Every man for himself." Invel muttered. "Sadly, gents, I have quite the backlog of work. I won't be able to join you tonight- a subordinate made a severe mistake..."
A subordinate who would be finding a free lunch on his desk, when he returned after the holiday.
"Predictable." Bloodman nodded. "Mortal weaknesses..."
...Invel felt shockingly little remorse for leaving Jacob to this fate.
"Well, I suppose then, we shall leave you to your miserable priorities...!" Neinhart laughed, idly waving. "Come, friends, let us 'paint the town!'"
"I'll bring you a coffee tommorow."
"...See you then..."
And finally, finally, Invel could get back to work.
...Honestly, it was almost a shame. If it had been Jacob alone, he might've been swayed... They didn't exactly overlap interests much, but he was easy to get along with, and it was hardly as though they'd lack for conversation topics while enjoying the festivities...
Bloodman could be... Odd. But he was a favoured creation of their beloved Emperor. Even Neinhart and God Serena had their charms, when Invel was drunk or patient enough to ignore the rest of them.
But the three of them together?
...Jacob's sacrifice would be remembered...
Steadily, the pile of paperwork on his desk sunk like the sun behind him. Most of it was fairly simple- he still needed to get to the bottom of how exactly this many documents ended up with some sort of transcription error, but that could- and given the possibility the answer was simply festive excitement causing human error, likely should- wait until the new year. But for now, much of it was simply reading over documents with a fine tooth comb, the steady rhythm split only by the occasional small correction, or sheet so mangled he had to wonder if they passed out on the page...
"Burning the midnight oil, Invel?"
This visitor, at least, had the decency to knock...
"Indeed, Irene. I assume you've been doing the same?" Invel confirmed, politely inclining his head, to the former queen.
"Something along those lines- a project that Wall boy's been trying to get my interest in." Irene shrugged, letting herself in- revealing August and Larcade behind her, both silently glaring at each other with the strange tension the two of them always showed. "I figured giving it a glance would be as good a gift as any- and it proved surprisingly fascinating..."
"Did the three of you need anything?"
"That's what I came to ask you..." August chuckled, the silent starting contest breaking. "I happened across Irene on my way here- I heard there was some form of mishap in your department, and I've finished my own tasks for the day..."
"Ah... Thank you, but I'll be fine. I'm nearing the end, and I fear much of it is rather specific to my duties..." Invel chuckled. "I'm sure, logically, you could figure it out with ease, but I doubt I'll rest easy until I've checked it over for myself... What of you, Irene?"
"...You should enjoy these sorts of festivities while you're young." Irene sighed, in leui of an answer. "Times like these will pass by before you know it..."
...ah. That made sense. Had it not been winter when...?
Regardless. This time of year often made Irene more sentimental than typical of her.
"Perhaps I'll find some time once I've finished- I doubt the stall owners will exactly be quick to take their leave in the early hours." Invel chuckled, shaking his head. "As a matter of fact- there's a spot I know of that stays open till late tommorow, and it's rarely crowded to boot..."
"...See to it that you do." Irene chuckled, lightly rapping his forehead. "It would hardly do for the Emperor's favourite errand boy to work himself into an early grave, after all..."
"You flatter me," Invel sighed. "And while his heir stands in the room no less..."
"I am far more than an errand boy..." Larcade scoffed. "...You are an exceptional one, however, I'll concur."
"Larcade giving praise?" Invel chuckled, "I'd ask if christmas came early, but I fear that joke hardly works today, of all days..."
"Ha! I wouldn't have bothered with your gift, if I knew you were so easily pleased!" Larcade laughed, dropping a quill onto his desk. "Alas, it's already prepared: I found the culprit behind your current late night."
"The quill...?" Invel sighed, examining it. "This is why I banned enchanted note takers..."
"Oh gods that's- Invel I may need to strangle one of your underlings." Irene gasped, a look of abject disgust on her face and the faint glow of magic around her eyes. "Purely out of professional pride. That quill is atrocious- how does it even wri... Larcade, who made that monstrosity."
"Sadly, I couldn't discern. From the looks of things, it was a genuine mistake, someone prone to sharing mixed a personal toy with their work stationary, and the whole office suffered..." Larcade shrugged. "I'll have the full details written for you by new years. Happy holidays, errand boy."
"...Thank you, Larcade."
And with that, he was gone.
That boy had such strange ways of showing affection...
"I suppose if we can be of no help, that will be all." August sighed, already holding the door for Irene. "At the risk of nagging, please do consider Irene's advice..."
"I don't nag, brat." the woman in question scoffed, taking the offered door regardless. "And if you want to punish whoever made such a foolish mistake, just send them my way. I want a word."
"Ah, so never tell you a thing. Understood."
"...Brats, brats everywhere..."
And Invel was once again alone.
Knowing the cause sped his pace. He was almost looking forwards to the almighty lecture he had planned, by the time the stack dwindled and faded to the last few, with how many times he'd turned it over in his mind...
Right as he reached the final page, a soft thud came from outside his door.
...August was usually the last to leave, excluding himself. Who else would still be here...?
"Where is everyone...?" the Emperor mused, idly wandering around the office and gently rubbing his head. "Is it the weekend...?"
"My Emperor!" Invel immediately kneeled, "My sincerest apologies- we didn't expect your return for another week!"
"Oh? I gave you a date this time?" Emperor Spriggan sighed, "Why would I do something as foolish as that...?"
"Ah... It's the festive season, your majesty." Invel was quick to answer, "You didn't so much give us a specific date as a general timeframe..."
"I see..." Emperor Spriggan delicately fixed an askew chair. "What date is it, exactly...?"
"Christmas Day, your majesty."
"...I see." he sighed. "...it's been so very long since I celebrated..."
...One sheet remained on his desk.
His Emperor stood before him.
"If it would please you, your majesty..." Invel hesitantly offered, "I was just about to take my leave. The place I was headed is rarely crowded, and certainly not at this time, it will be... unlikely to aggravate your condition...?"
"...Thank you, Invel. That sounds delightful."
The paperwork would be there tommorow.