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Dear 2667,
I'm not really sure why I'm writing this. It's not like I'll be sending it to you.
I suppose I just wanted to put my words onto paper, just for the off chance one day I'm out somewhere and you come back and break into my home. Not likely to happen, but we never know.
I still think about that day a lot. When you ran from me suddenly that evening without a word, despite the fact we only spoke that morning. I thought I did something wrong, I worried so much that I did do something wrong for you to hate me. That week was back and forth of hating you and wishing you'd come back to tell me what happened, to apologize. I didn't know what to do, so I spoke to friends, even the ones you were friends with.
So went you appeared on my door after one of our shared friends cut you off just to ask me to wish them well, I couldn't help but ask.
Did you even think of me when you came knocking on my door? I don't think you did.
You couldn't speak, you didn't have any reasons. The more you deflected, the more irritated I got. I didn't know what you wanted me to do.
When I asked you why you left, you said you didn't know. Maybe it helped you for a bit, maybe it didn't. I told you I just wanted closure, and you told me you had nothing to give.
You did. You could've given me a sorry, even if you didn't mean it. But you couldn't even give me that.
The fact even in the end, when you left me behind that day, you didn't have a reason. And that when you came back, you didn't come back to see me, but a friend.
To think I've been friends with you my whole life, when things ended like this, felt unreal.
To think that the person who was at my door that day, name and soul I could see even if I was watching it change in front of me, could be the same Guest I knew a few years back felt like someone was playing a cruel joke.
Ever since your life crumbled, I've been there for you, watching you find new things, new people to find solace in. I was happy for you, I really was, even if I could never understand it.
I wish things were in your favour more, maybe things would've turned out better. But it won't ever be.
Whatever being or person or thing you were suddenly obsessed with caused something in you to change for the worst, I see that now. The friendly but reclusive Guest I knew has turned into a person who couldn't even realize how their own actions had hurt their friend of so many years.
No amount of words could show me more on how you chose an obsession over a trusted friend, by your own words. And you showed me that with your fucking detached and ignorant responses.
Maybe I'm a hypocrite, focusing my attention all on you like my life depended on it. I would've given my life up for you if you told me to without a second thought. But the fact remains the same I suppose.
I just wanted you to say sorry. But instead you got a slam of a door because you couldn't get off your high horse and admit your adoration with your Saviour poisoned us.
You're not getting this goodbye letter from me directly, you honestly don't deserve it. But honestly, this is my final, proper goodbye to you.
I wish we could've stayed friends, 2047. I hope the next time we see each other we don't even realize or recognize us. I don't want to see you again.
I loved you, but I now I think I hate you.
Goodbye, my dearest friend. I hope I haunt you.
Yours beloved,
crashout_heart