Work Text:
Mori: Man, they look like a real handful. How do you deal with them?
Fukuzawa, watching Atsushi screaming, Dazai trying to set a sleeping Kunikida on fire, and Kenji choking on air: I don't know either.
\o/
Dazai: I have a plan.
Atsushi: Good! As long as we aren’t breaking the law again, I’m open to hearing it.
Dazai: …
Atsushi: …
Dazai: I no longer have a plan.
\o/
Chuuya: Ok so, apparently the "bad vibes" I've been feeling are actually severe psychological distress.
Kouyou: You haven't had sleep in literal weeks.
\o/
Dazai: Kill him.
Fyodor: This is the kind of quality advice I look for.
\o/
Kunikida: We need a distraction.
Yosano: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Kenji, whispering: My time has come.
\o/
Chuuya, to Kouyou: How do you tell someone politely you want to hit them with a brick?
Kouyou: Is the person Dazai?
Chuuya:
Kouyou: There is no need to be polite. You won't be able to hit him anyway.
Mori: Say, "I'm sorry to inform you sir, I'm going to hit you with a brick."
\o/
Dazai: I’m a reverse necromancer.
Atsushi: Isn’t that just killing people?
Dazai: Ah, technically.
\o/