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Soft lips on theirs.
Softs breaths on their face.
Soft hands holding their jaw.
It was so… soft.
Slate could kiss Gossan like this forever.
The pair sat on Slate's couch, Gossan straddling their thighs, chest-to-chest. Slate's hands clutched the back of Gossan's shirt. They couldn't help it. Everything was so soft, and their friend's shirt was just rough enough to keep them grounded.
Gossan's lips trapped one of Slate's between them, tugged gently, and let go — oh, stars, their heart was racing, their face heating. Slate let out a breath.
"Slate," Gossan crooned.
Thmp thmp thmp.
So much… too much.
Slate dropped their head to Gossan's shoulder and brought their hands up to hook over their friend's shoulders from behind. Close, close. If they were pressed together, Gossan wouldn't see how much Slate was feeling.
They were silent, Slate trying to control their shaky breaths.
Finally, Gossan spoke quietly.
"Too fast?"
Too much. Slate thought, flushing harder and burying their face in their friend's neck. The skin there was warm and… soft.
Slate breathed deeply. They were okay. It was only Gossan, who they'd be mortified to share their feelings with. They'd kissed like this before, though, so it was fine. Well, Gossan had kissed Slate. Slate had never done much of anything back. It was too much, too… revealing.
An idea struck Slate, then, and they took another deep breath to steady themself. Of course. Gossan was always leading, leaving Slate to react and get needy and mushy. But if Slate led…
They pressed a chaste kiss to Gossan's neck. The reaction was immediate — their friend hissed a sharp breath in and sighed with a little whimper.
"O-oh… Slate…"
Slate's entire body tensed. They let out a choked breath and pressed their open mouth to Gossan's neck before they let themself think.
"Stars— Mmn— Feels good…"
Their heart pounded, their stomach clenched, their toes curled, and sweat prickled up their back. So much, too much. But Gossan's reactions, their hands moving up to fist in their shirt, their thighs tightening around Slate's… they wanted more.
Slate swirled their tongue against the skin under their mouth and Gossan let out a soft little gasp, then a quiet, heated moan. Their hips twitched against Slate's lap and suddenly Slate's skin was on fire.
Too much.
Slate shoved Gossan off the couch and drew their knees up to their chest, covering their face.
"Ow— What the fuck!? Slate!"
Shame replaced the flames on their skin with a sickening heat from within that felt so much worse.
Sorry. Slate thought, their throat tightening up, refusing to let a single peep through. Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry.
Gossan huffed as they stood. "What in Hearth's name is wrong with you!? I thought we were— but— ugh."
Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry didn't mean to sorry sorry
"Hello?? You can't just shove me off your lap and then go silent on me. Say something!"
Slate buried their face in their arms, covering their head and curling further into themself. They stopped trying to force themself to speak. What was the point? Gossan would be hurt and angry whether Slate failed to talk or didn't even try.
"You act like we're together and then literally push me away!" Gossan's voice rose until they were shouting. "What am I supposed to think anymore, Slate? What do you want from me?"
Slate didn't know what they wanted. They wanted their friend to pin them down and kiss them stupid. They wanted to seem nonchalant and cool. They wanted to hold Gossan, trace their patterns, trail their lips over their skin. They wanted to never touch another Hearthian ever again. They wanted all of it and none of it. Their brain felt like a blown circuit.
"Fine." There was a sight tremble in Gossan's voice that tore at Slate's chest. "See if I care. Enjoy being alone, I guess."
The door slamming made Slate jump. Their heart pounded, they felt like they were gonna hurl. They rocked in place, face flushing harder when the tears finally escaped them. They wondered how much longer Gossan would tolerate this. Was this their last chance? How many would it take?
Slate sniffed, then sighed.
"Fuck," they whispered.