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Jack looked up, ears ringing and heart in his throat. Ecstatic and relieved all at once. He did it. He made it. Everything was behind him; Gus- the others had come back for him, and they were leaving Gruhuken. Together.
And nothing in the world could make him return.
Twisting, relief like a balloon filling his chest and ready to take off, Jack looked back at the empty shore that had been his entire world for so long. Already, the rocky shore was distant and indistinct. Rocks and snow, too close to discern the separations between the shades of grey.
And the bear stand. Standing apart from the landscape. Just as lonely and foreboding as it had always been.
The dread that filled him whenever he looked at it returned. Fear, crawling up his throat, nausea rocking his stomach in time with the longboat. The shadow that haunted it wasn't there.
"Jack? Are you okay?" Gus's voice was soft behind him. Slow and careful.
The same way he'd speak to Isaak when they had to walk too close to the bear stand. When long shadows trailed in their wake and it was a race to get inside and dive under the stacked blankets.
As though the blankets ever stopped the coldly reaching hands. Or the frosted fingerprints that appeared just above his neck. Trepidation came then. Twisting his gut into painful knots, it was too easy. It-
A vibration pressed at Jack's leg. Low and steady, strengthening with every second, making Jack look down until his eyes landed on his most faithful companion.
Isaak's ruff was raised, hair standing stiffly upright, the low growl turning louder as his lips peeled away from shining teeth. Staring straight ahead, where Gus sat, fingers twisted together as he said something. The words distant and lost as the ringing in Jack's ears turned into warning sirens.
There was a hand, just behind and to the side of Gus, just resting on the stained wood behind him. Some of the nails were gone, leaving raw wounds turned purple with the cold and decay.
The world slowed, even the waves seemed to pause as Jack raised his head, eyes lifting up to Gus' relieved face, and past it the dark shadow already starting to move.
"Jack?" The relief on Gus' face faltered, turning to concern as he began to lean forwards. "Are you alright?"
Mouth opening to yell, Jack could only watch as time caught up with the world and everything came crashing down.
The shadow pressed up against Gus from behind, arms looped and gripping the blue eyed man in a bear hug. Ice and water splashing as they both fell overboard.
Someone yelled, barking, the sounds of a world turned insane. A hand was grabbing Jack's shoulder, someone shouting in his ear, then screaming as Jack threw an elbow back into something soft. Breaking free of the hold and rushing forwards.
Jack dove in, the shock of the cold water crushing his lungs, any air he'd managed to suck in now exploding in bubbles fleeing his lungs as the cold hit. It forced him back up, chest heaving, fingers already numb as he desperately inhaled before diving again. Eyes open and stinging from the salt and bone deep cold, head whipping back and forth as he searched for any sign of Gus.
More bubbles. Below and rising up beneath him.
And pale fingers, glove lost, curling and grabbing at nothing as they sank further away from the light.
Jack swam after them, arms slow to move and heavy under the thick coat. Twisting in the water and ripping it off even as he kept kicking downward. One of his own gloves coming loose, unnoticed as it floated away.
Lungs starting to burn, Jack kept going, pushing through the water with everything he had left. Knowing if he lost track of Gus' clawing fingers he'd never find him.
The cold burrowed in, the strong strokes slowing, ears popping as he sank deeper. Jack pushed again, eyes widening as the pale human fingers turned into a hand.
Into a desperately writhing shape surrounded by darkness.
The blond head arched backwards, Gus' hopeless eyes meeting Jack's. Blinking in shock as another bubble escaped his tight lips and puffed cheeks.
Jack put everything he had into the last few strokes of his arms. Grabbing onto Gus' shoulder with one arm before shoving at the darkness with his right. Nails burning beneath the cold, as he pulled, trying to free Gus.
Bubbles blocked Jack's view, squinting and shaking his head to look past. The dread in his chest dropped in horror as he saw Gus' mouth open and filling with water. He ripped, numb fingers sinking into the darkness and yanking again. Losing some of his own precious oxygen as he pulled Gus closer, pressing his mouth against the struggling man and exhaling.
Pulling back just enough to see Gus begin to struggle again, frantic to reach the surface. Jack didn't hesitate, didn't stop to think, before shoving the other upward. Watching as the dark space erupted in light and bubbles as Gus kicked upwards. Free from the grip that had dragged him down.
Fingers colder than the ice surrounding them gripped Jack's wrist, halting his movement, trapping and keeping him from following Gus to safety. More bubbles, the last precious amounts of oxygen he'd trapped in his lungs escaping. Following Gus’ out of sight until there were no more.
Jack took one second, staring up as Gus moved up and away, before looking back at the form now gripping his wrist. The haunt coming home and getting his first true look at the shadow of Gruhuken.
Neck still painfully angled, mouth open and bared in a rictus grin with all of its fractured and missing teeth on display. Empty sockets, dark with a viscous fluid that defied the surrounding water where eyes had been ripped away. Either by the men who got away with it or scavengers after an easy meal. The once human face now distorted with malevolence and the undying need for revenge.
Jack wanted to say something clever, like "you can't have him". But his mouth was already filled with water, or some other sickly loving devotion. Instead, eyes blinking slowly, oxygen gone and the world darkening at the corners, Jack grinned.
His own teeth bared in triumph, letting the ghost know it had lost. Smug in the knowledge that he’d stopped it, he’d saved Gus, thrilled as the remains of the others' faces twisted and the knowledge. In this moment, he could die happy.
The darkness in the empty sockets spreads, merges with the dark water surrounding them. Shadowed fingers reaching out and taking hold until Jack knows no more.
A world explodes. Still frozen and cold, but Jack can hear voices. Shouting, with the ever present stilted loudness of voices in winter. Bursts of color and pain driving through numbness. A blue so pretty his heart started to beat again.
Warmth and arms around him, Jack smiled as his head tilted forwards, falling into wet cloth as voices turned anguished. His ears didn’t work, it didn’t look like his hand would either, not with a band of darkness wrapping around his wrist.
It’s so cold, Jack wanted to say. But the need faded along with the world, and eventually the pressing cold turned into a light warmth. Pressing against another form and hearing a familiar voice laugh and share stories. Of soft kisses that didn’t need to be hidden and pressing close under the safety of blankets.
Away from the inevitable shadow trailing in their wake. Away from an annoying voice that made his teeth grind and nails dig into his palms. Jack wished he could stay.
The calm and smug serenity he faced death with was dead and frozen when Jack awoke. When he knew he was truly awake and not trapped in dreams and nightmares. Body burning and lungs like sandpaper had scored them. As though his entire body was dying, from every bone to muscle, shifting to one side earned him the realization that his hair hurt.
Opening his eyes hurt. More than just a general ache, it felt like they were glued shut and he was ripping his skin trying to open them. The droning voice in the back of his head sputtered to a stop. Thank god, Jack was so tired of his inner voice sounding like Algie. He hadn’t thought he'd been that awful in life to deserve Algie’s voice forever in his ear.
"Jack?"
At least Algie's voice was further away now. Perhaps Jack could go back to sleep? No, his eyes were open, squinting at the bright lights and brighter white of the room. It took effort, and far longer than he expected for his eyes to stop tearing up.
"You're awake?"
"G'way." Jack muttered, though Algie's form getting between him and the overhead lights did cast a lovely shadow. He could stay if he remained quiet.
Almost immediately the shadow was gone and Algie was screaming.
"Gus! Gus, he's awake! Get in here!"
There was more yelling, and the distant crashing sounds like waves on rocks, and Jack wished it would go back to the peaceful quiet. If there was one thing he might miss about the cursed shores of Svalbard, it was the quiet. When he wasn't being stalked by darkness and the stench of salt and decay the quiet was nice. Peaceful.
None of the screaming that was steadily growing closer and louder. Driving spikes through Jack's eyes and into his skull as the wordless yelling came close enough for the slurred sounds to start forming words. Not that any of them made sense past the building headache.
"Steady on, old man!" Algie's annoying voice continued. "He's not going anywhere!"
"You can't have that dog in here!"
"Algie?! He's?"
"Get in," Algie replied, voice softening briefly before returning to the pompous one he used so well. "I'll hold them off."
Jack squinted, eyes opening just in time to slam shut again as a heavy force landed on his legs. The familiar scent of dog cutting through the medical tang in the air as something wet and warm smacked his face.
"Isaak?" Jack coughed, hands up and trying to fend off the excited dog. Energy spiking and bringing him to full wakefulness. "You're here? You're alright!"
"Jack."
He looked up, past the husky still kissing his face, eyes meeting bright blue ones.
"Gus?" Jack whispered, awkwardly petting Isaak, eyes roving over the other man.
He looked good, cheeks full and eyes bright, hands gripping the metal end of the bed as he stared back.
"You're alive?" Swallowing hurt more than opening his eyes had, the lump in his throat refusing to move. Brain refuses to make sense of his last memory and dreams all together too bright and fading. "I didn't… We escaped?"
"Yes, Jack." Gus smiled, the flesh healthy and not cracking from the motion. "We all did, you uh."
The migraine pulsed, but compared to feeling his body shut down as he drowned the pain wasn't anything he couldn't work through. And Gus was there staring at him, watching his every move like Jack was the one that had been in danger.
"You're in a hospital, back home in England." Gus spoke quietly, hands worrying. "We went to Norway first. Got you settled and out of danger. But…"
Gus' face, mouth worked, searching for words and finding none as far as Jack could tell.
"How long…" Jack coughed, the dry feeling of his throat keeping the question locked away behind pain.
"Oh, sorry Jack, here!" Gus hurriedly grabbed a large carafe to the side of the bed, on a small table that Jack could see had some partially eaten meals. Pouring water so quickly it splashed and soaked the sleeve of Gus' shirt before he held out for Jack. "Let me help."
The coolness of the water was the most refreshing taste Jack could remember, and better still with the other man holding him up, arm around one shoulder as he held the cup steady. It was pulled away only after it was empty, Gus wordlessly holding up the carafe, putting them both down at the shake of Jack's head.
"You've been unconscious for a while." Gus said, stepping backward to where he'd been hovering before at the end of the bed. His blue eyes, Jack noticed, were still roving over him. And Isaak by default. "But, you saved me."
"What?"
Jack tries to sit up, arms shaking, body weak. At least the pillows broke his fall.
"You- you" Gus's face drops expression changing into something tragic. Jack didn't even know how to understand the expression that had been there only seconds before. "You don't remember?"
"I-" Jack tries to feign confusion. Judging by the look on Gus' face, he failed terribly. But the look that was left behind? Jack wasn't sure what it was. "I was dreaming, I think. Sorry I-"
Gus in the sunlight. Beautiful and kind. Reading aloud to Isaak and Jack about his new interests. Sciences that they had used and… the shadow behind him. Moving closer every time Jack dared to glance away. A hand reaching out, ready to steal Gus away, it's skin loose and dripping with foulness that is wished to pass on.
"You were hurt." Jack said slowly. Eyes dragging over inexorably towards Algie, the other man's huge frame blocking the doorway, with increasingly upset voices echoing through the hallway on the other side. "But- I saved you."
Gus nodded, glancing quickly over at Algie as the voices grew louder.
Jack could understand. He'd normally be one of them, at least internally shouting at Algie, but now? Jack had the fleeting suspicion that he might actually owe Algie for something. He hated the feeling.
"No, no." Jack watched absently as Algie turned and seemed to grow larger, blocking the doorway from whoever was making the high-pitched bleating noises of concern. "You cannot enter at the moment. Excuse me? You are questioning- Do you know who I am?"
Another familiar speech, one Jack was too exhausted to listen to or waste his energy on. Not when Gus was still looking at him with something like hope. That… Jack remembered standing on ice and waiting for a lurking shadow to finish it.
"Jack?"
"I..." Jack stared at Gus' hands sinking into Isaak's thick fur. "You were pulled out of the boat. I. I froze, but when I couldn't see you."
Jack trailed off, not sure how to explain the feeling of stabbing pain followed by the feeling of his body turning numb as he dove into water through ice. The desperate movement, arms carving through the water, taking him deeper until he found Gus. The moment of feeling his limbs stop responding when he needed them the most.
The relief when he succeeded.
"I jumped in after you." Jack muttered, looking down at his fingers. Surprisingly they weren't wrapped as tight as he'd imagined.
"You did." Gus said gently, finally moving closer, reaching out to pet Isaak's spine. Hand moving until it paused just a hair's breath from Jack's. "You saved me."
"I…" Jack froze, staring at Isaak's black and white back. "I tried to."
"You did." Gus said firmly. His pretty blue eyes were nearly as distant as his own felt. "The…"
Gus's voice faltered.
"It… he… let go."
Jack didn't react at first half in terror and half in
Incomprehension. Because that meant it really had been a dream. A nightmare he'd woken from only to wish with all his being to return too. The ghost and its cold malevolence was worth it. Worth the quick affectionate kisses Gus would press to the edge of his lips before running after Isaak before he could steal the hanging reindeer meat. It was worth the quiet evenings, listening to the wind and hoping the sound of footsteps wasn't coming closer, as long as he spent that evening safe in Gus' arms.
Tears welled at the corners of his eyes, Jack gripping Isaak's thick fur and bending forwards, ignoring the aches and tight muscles, desperate to hide his face before the others could see the tears ready to spill down his hollow cheeks.
"Jack?"
"Gus-" Algie's voice was incomprehensibly soft, Jack had never heard it like that before, then the familiar tone returned. Loud, self-assured, and making Jack want to jump out of the bed and finally punch the bastard. "Does it look like I am talking to you?! Go find the doctor. or someone that knows what they are doing, and I shall think about allowing admittance. Gus—get on with it, man. They're about ready to go through me."
"Algie-" Gus didn't bother looking over shoulder, head dropping forwards in an uncomfortably familiar motion. "Jack."
Jack did not look up. Couldn't look up. Not when Isaak's snow proof fur was dampening under his face.
"Please don't take this the wrong way." Gus whispered, eyes still lowered, but his entire face now pink and reading as terrified to Jack's eyes. And he'd spent so much time looking at Gus's face he should know those tiny expressions. "Jack , you're everything. I've been sitting here, every day, more if Algie didn't threaten to bar me."
Another thing to curse Algie for, Jack thought morosely.
"Trying to find the right words. I've been writing them all down. Every single thought. We spent so little time together, but I thought I lost you." The breath Gus inhaled sounded wet and wretched. "When I surfaced and you weren't there. Here, when you wouldn't wake up. I didn't think I could live without you. Please."
His warm hands pressed against Jack's cheeks, gently but insistently lifting his face free of sticking dog fur. One finger brushing along his cheek, a small laugh at the dog fur stuck there. Jack had only a moment to look up beneath tear-clumped eyelashes.
Gus' blue eyes smiled before slowly leaning in. Jack stared, unsure what the other man was doing now that reality was restored. It couldn't…
As healing lips pressed against his own, Jack was still confused. This was real, right? Gus couldn't be kissing him.
It certainly felt real. Messier and more awkward than the kisses he'd dreamed up. Gus tasted sweet, as though he'd been sucking on candies, and he was not as good as Jack had imagined. But it was so much better and where was he supposed to put his hands? Could he kiss back?
Then Gus pulled back, heartbreak crossing his face, the pink embarrassment turning white with terror. Jack stiffened, looking around for the ever present shadow that dogged his steps, down to his wrist where the perpetual bruise stood dark against his wrist.
Or should have. Instead, a perfectly white, maybe not perfect, cast was wrapped around his wrist and lower arm. Hiding it from view.
"Oh," Gus murmured, following Jack's gaze. "It broke when. When we were in the water. The doctors say it's healing nicely though! They don't think there should be any lingering effects."
Like a hand shaped bruise that never left.
"I'm not dreaming?" Jack asked carefully, tears still sliding downward, heart stuttering as he looked up at Gus. The heartbroken look now at war with a bad attempt at smiling. "We escaped?"
"Yes Jack." Gus started leaning back, eyes now looking anywhere other than the bedbound man's face. "We did, and we'll make sure you get well taken care of, I'm so sorry. Please don't."
Whatever Gus was going to ask him not to do could wait.
Jack reached out, both hands shaking with effort, gripping Gus shirt like the lifeline it was and yanking him forwards. The yank didn't work, Jack had the distant feeling he'd been asleep longer than he thought, but Gus cautiously leaned forwards.
And finally it was Jack's turn to kiss him. Teeth clacking together, noses squished, and mouths almost too hot to the touch. A real kiss. Jack had to stop far too quickly, the need to breathe painful as it reminded him. He kept Gus close though, nose pressed into the pretty man's cheek as he breathed heavily.
"Tell Algie to stop looking and go away." Jack muttered. "I'd like another kiss."
Booming laughter came from Algie's direction, along with words, but Jack was far more interested in Gus' white face turning pink at the edges. That and the huge smile taking over his features.
"You mean that?" Gus asked breathily, like it was his own body trying to breathe. "With me?"
"Yes," Jack pressed closer, still breathing past exhaustion and wishing his body would put a little effort into assuring the other man. "I fought a ghost for you."
"You did," Gus' blue eyes crinkled at the edges with the force of his smile. "Please don't do that again."
"We're not going back there, right?" Jack asked after receiving a softer kiss at the corner of his mouth.
"No." It was the firmest he'd ever heard Gus' voice go. Nearly as cold as those distant shores. "Never. We can go somewhere warm. Ack!"
Isaak moved in then, clearly done with his humans being odd and ignoring him. The dog bounced closer, giving both Jack and Gus his own kisses. Whatever he'd been eating wasn't pemmican but judging by the smell it was something Jack didn't want to try himself.
"Isaak!" Gus laughed, pulling the dog back until Jack could breathe easier. "Yes, you can come too!"
Jack smiled, edges of his lips tilted upwards, watching the two loves of his life. And the utter lack of any shadow trailing after them.
Oh, and Algie in the corner still fending off whoever was still trying to enter the room. Thank god for Algie.
Jack met Gus' blue eyes and leaned back into the bed, shifting as much as his weakened limbs could, gesturing for the other to join. Maybe the life he'd thought they were living was just a dream, but this was real. They had all the time in the world now to explore and enjoy living. They could start slow, Jack decided as Gus lay gently next to him, one arm cautiously wrapping around Jack’s middle and squeezing.
Gruhuken and Svalbard would stay in their past. There were other places they could visit.